


Twisted Agentcorp, Supercorp and much more - Nothing makes a Danvers girl pine like a Luthor woman!

by Tukma



Category: Smallville, Supergirl (TV 2015), Twisted Agentcorp, supercorp - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Asperger Syndrome, Awkward Romance, Bipolar Disorder, Confusion, Dysfunctional Family, Earth 74, Earth-Prime (DCU), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Falling In Love, Family Bonding, Family Dynamics, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Physical Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kara Danvers is Supergirl, Kryptonite experiments, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Lena Luthor Needs a Hug, Lesbian Alex Danvers, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Kara Danvers, Lesbian Lena Luthor, Lex Luthor needs a hug, Love Confessions, Love/Hate, Minor Sanvers, Past Relationship(s), Phantom Zone, Post-Crisis on Infinite Earths Crossover Event (CW DC TV Universe), Pre-Crisis on Infinite Earths Crossover Event (CW DC TV Universe), Project 7734, Project Cadmus, Protective Alex Danvers, Protective Lena Luthor, Protective Lex Luthor, Revenge, Romantic Angst, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Smallville inspired, Supergirl (TV 2015) Season 5, Time Travel, Unexpected Connection, Unexpected partnership, Useless Lesbians, alternative Earth Prime, alternative versions of Kryptonite, energy cells, lesbian Lex Luthor, locked in syndrome, re-connecting, sanitarium
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:26:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 58
Words: 222,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26770621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tukma/pseuds/Tukma
Summary: Lillian Luthor Earth 74 had a daughter, she wasn't quite what her husband wanted but with Lillian's help she was able to prove she was every bit as amazing as Lillian said.  A small accident meant that Lillian found her way to Earth Prime, and with a flick of her pen, she changed destiny, meaning that now the three Luthor women were in charge, how it should be………….…………..or what happens when Lex Luthor gloats about his brilliance and how he created a whole new reality to the wrong Lillian Luthor.Alexandra Josephine Luthor - a woman with a tormented past, aspergers and bipolar disorder under the treatment of her mother is now running the DEO, Lena is back and trying to help, Lena and Kara connect and Alex is not happy about it, however she somehow finds herself feeling drawn to Lex much to her own shock…………… Alternative universe, fun and frolics, why??? Because I could.
Relationships: Alex Danvers & Kara Danvers, Alex Danvers/Lex Luthor, Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Lena Luthor & Lex Luthor, Lena Luthor & Lex Luthor & Lillian Luthor
Comments: 130
Kudos: 56





	1. Lane's Legacy

**Author's Note:**

> Lex in my mind is played by Lana Parilla, Evil queen from Once
> 
> This story is born from a number of role plays that I have been involved in, a genderbent Lex Luthor with a backstory that is very detailed, inspired this fic. It is a dual story or a Twisted agentcorp - Lex and Alex and Supercorp post season 5. Since the multiverse is all a mess following season 5; I decided that it was the perfect oportunity to write something a little different, I hope that you like it, comments always welcome as long as they are constructive.
> 
> Supercorp storyline co-constructed with CeruleanLemniscate
> 
> Chapter pairings - 
> 
> 1-3 Background and set up  
> 4 Supercorp  
> 5 Danvers sisters  
> 6 Supercorp  
> 7-8 Twisted Agent corp  
> 9 Supercorp  
> 10 Sanvers - Smut  
> 11-12 Twisted Agent Corp - minor Supercorp  
> 13 Lena and Alex  
> 14 Lex Lillian  
> 15 Supercorp  
> 16 Lex and Maggie / Supercorp  
> 17 Sanvers  
> 18 Lena and Lex (minor Alex)  
> 19 Kara and Alex (minor supercorp  
> 20 Supercorp (minor Alex)  
> 21 Supercorp  
> 22 Twisted Agentcorp (minor alex and vasquez)  
> 23 Twisted Agentcorp (minor supercorp)  
> 24 Supercorp - Twisted agentcorp  
> 25 Twisted agentcorp  
> 26 Lex and Lena  
> 27 Kara and Alex (minor supercorp)  
> 28 Lena and Lex  
> 29 Alex and Kara/supercorp  
> 30 Supercorp  
> 31 Supercorp - smut  
> 32 Alex (danvers sister) (Vasquez)  
> 33 Lena (Alex) (Lex)  
> 34 Twisted Agentcorp  
> 35 Twisted agentcorp  
> 36 Lena and Kara  
> 37 Twisted  
> 38 Twisted  
> 39 Twisted  
> 40 Danvers sisters  
> 41 Lex and Kara  
> 42 Alex and Lena  
> 43 Kara minor Alex and Lena  
> 44 Supercorp  
> 45 Luthor sisters, Danvers sisters  
> 46 2 months Luthor sisters  
> 47 2 months Danvers sisters  
> 48 Twisted and Supercorp  
> 49 Twisted and supercorp  
> 50 Alex, Lena and Kara  
> 51 Lex, Minor Alex  
> 52 Twisted, supercorp smut  
> 53 Luthor sisters  
> 54 Danvers sisters  
> 55 Twisted - date  
> 56 Twisted, supercorp, sisters  
> 57 Twisted, supercorp, sisters  
> 58 Twisted agencorp  
> 59 Luthors and Danvers  
> 60 Luthors and Danvers  
> 61 small Lena and Alex then Kara and Lex  
> 62 Lena, AleX and Lex - Twisted after  
> 63 Supercorp smut  
> 64 Twisted - Alex and Lena - All  
> 65 Twisted smut  
> 66 All  
> 67 The luthors   
> 68 Twisted (minor Lena)  
> 69 Twisted

Sanitarium (Metropolis) 09-21-2015 Earth 74 06:00……... 

Admitted: Jane Doe   
Patient: 29358-4   
Gender: Female   
Hight: 5ft 5in   
Weight 120lb  
Hair: Brown  
Eyes: Brown  
Status: Comatosed

There was no press, no fanfare nothing, Alexandra Josephine Luthor infamous Murderer, Xenophobic maniac was being transfered into the Sanitarium from a military facility. The day was cold and dark, the operation to move the patient completed with military precision under the watchful eye of General Lane. The cover of darkness and the time meaning that only the night staff were in attendance, the fewer people that saw who they were bringing into the facility the better it was. The skelington crew of nursing staff were bolstered by security, a private firm, all vetted and ex military. Everyone was to sign NDA’s and ensure that the move was secret and that no one knew that she was there. The clause in the contract was imprisonment as an act of terrorism, meaning that they would have no rights, they would be taken for project 7734, The Luthor woman would turn them all into weapons, when she finally returned from her trip, if they dared either way it was a win, win for the General, they kept it quiet and he had a hold over Lillian, they didnt and he had a new army.

The records in the hospital read Jane Doe, the payment was through a project in the government. There was just a designation 7734/001. All information regarding Lex Luthor was redacted from the government database and she was deposited there. There were movements in her eyes, sometimes rapid, sometimes slow; it was put down to electrical stimulation within her brain, a result of the ECT. Initially the staff were freaked out by the way she seemed to sleep and wake, her eyes open and closed at different times, the way that her lids moved with what seemed like patterns, how sometimes it seemed as though they followed the staff around the room, like she was watching them. The staff were assured that there was no danger. Lex Luthor posed no threat to them and that she would never change from the state that she was in.

People wondered why there was an insistence in keeping her alive, she was fed through a tube, given IV fluids and electrolytes. For the first few months people expected the matriarch of the Luthor family to descent all ice and venom, removing her daughter from them and threatening everyone. She never came, even the military stopped coming around after a year, no longer continuing the treatments; the hospital staff believed that the military treatments were keeping her in this state and there was concern once they stopped coming that she would come back. It was a tense few months but nothing changed and people became comfortable again. It was years later and things had changed. It started out that no one knew about her being there, however over time, people found that they could make money off the rich, the influential, some even took nothing for the pleasure of helping someone grieve. For all intensive purposes the woman was dead, although her body just didn't seem to give up. Still no one came, not her sister who had taken over the company and renamed it, not her mother, not a friend. 

No one felt sorry for her, as much as they were all trained nurses, people who were supposed to care, that was Lex Luthor, she was a mass murderer, she had tried twice to kill superman. The bare minimum of care was afforded her, there was no one to answer to, no one came to check. She languished in that room, not alive, not dead just held in a state of comatose purgatory, the general consensus was that was a fitting payment for her crimes, some even went as far to hope that what they said was true that people in a coma could still hear what was happening and register the passing of time.

Sanitarium (Metropolis) six months before Crisis on infinite Earths. Earth 74 19:40…….

Lex lay in her bed, she didn't know what time it was or even the day, she had long since stopped counting them with any purpose. After three days of treatment from General Lane, ECT and compounds injected in her, she would wake long enough to refuse to speak and he would start again. Three days, he continued until it was no longer a choice. She wasn't sure when it happened exactly but she was back where she started in this life only worse. This time whatever he had done had locked her into her mind and her body. She had counted to start, three shifts a day, three different incompetent nurses, and a day was gone, she counted until two weeks had passed, but her mother didn't come. She had thought that when her mother returned to project 7734 she would find out that the treatments had gone wrong and collected her, brought her back but she had not come, so Lex stopped counting after the first year; the occasional military presence making her think that her mother could still come, but she realised she was now what her mother feared defective.

This was different to when she was a child, she had not spoken a word, her interest in the world outside her mind held interest only as far as what she could take a part and study. She could move freely and chose what she looked at, move out of the path of people and entertain herself with things that needed to be understood, she had a great interest in science, in engineering even as a three year old she had a intellect that rivaled and surpassed most people not that anyone would have known then. She had been determined to have a 12th level intellect in her later life but as a child her father had thought of her as defective. There had been arguments between her parents about what to do with her but it had been her mother Lillian that had decided that experimentation was that way to prove that she was not defective. Her treatments had eventually pulled her from inside her mind. Now she was trapped again, only she couldnt move. She was no longer able to satisfy her own curiosity, just trapped within her mind. 

She wondered if she had been less intelligent would she feel so trapped, she was feeling like she might lose her mind. Was this what it was like to go mad, something that she had been accused of time and time again, like insanity was ruling her decisions not intelligence. However in this state, in this place her own private cell, which there was no escape from, she wondered if it was possible that she would go mad. No prison could have held Lex and she couldn't help but think of the words of Aristotle “No great mind has ever existed without a touch of madness.” maybe she had been mad for a long time, maybe the quoting of ancient greeks was the sign that she had started to become introspective. She had always been a touch ego centric but there was something different about having time that can not be used in other ways, it was no surprise that when she wanted to think about possible advancements she thought about her road here.

She lay in the sanitarium, no longer caring what day it was, long since her efforts to communicate ceased, the nurses did not care if she would blink, which was all that she could do. They didn't even try to get her to give yes or no answers. She could have composed a book if there was someone with a more than mediocre mind in that place. She had finished cracking the sequence, she finally understood the missing pieces, having so much time to lay and do nothing. She was fairly sure that she was now in possession of the code needed to prove that not only were there more elements than the 118 on the periodic table but that each one corresponds to a different form of Kryptonite. If someone bothered to notice her communication in morse code using blinks, she could have even given them the information to help her not that she thought anyone cared enough to help. She sometimes told them what she thought of their abilities, their lack of intelligence. Mostly she just hoped that whoever came in the room was just an inept nurse, like now as she heard the door open.

Lex knew that she made mistakes, they were never out of malas or intent, she was just curious, she wanted to know how things worked and create things that were better than the thing that came before. Being forced into being the head of LexCorp she had no interest in the business. Her mother assured her that she would be left to do what she wanted as long as she signed the papers the board gave her, she didn't even read them. This led to the combining of the industrial Lexi-suit and the triage AI. The government wanted a weapon designed to find the source of the illness and come up with a cure became finding a weakness and eliminating the threat, a suit to help build things became a combative suit. Lex had been forced into things she didn't want, she had become depressed and by the time the suit needed demonstrating she was ready. For the second time in her life she tried to end her own torment. 

Superman intervened just as the first time that she tried to give herself release and there was a fight, she became the property of the US government. The first time had resulted in treatment, more scarring, more instability of her mood, an increase in sensory issues and an obsession around the way she got out of the accident. She built the red son machine, then they had her building cyborgs and finally the red tornado. She didn't trust or like the supers but she wanted defence not destruction so sabotaged it. Lex was a 12th Level intellect and knew that if there were supers there were others and the supers could be of use, she wasn't wasteful but some control was needed. That was the point she refused to speak, the point at which she was forced back into her own mind.

People had died, all the information pointed to her, she was the most hated person on the planet. She didn't understand the emotions that people felt towards her, she didn't really understand them at all. By the time she was 15 she had multiple diagnosis, people who believed that this or that was wrong with her, but they finally settled on Asperger's syndrome and bipolar disorder. Lex found it amusing that someone with aspergers, someone with the inability to understand the emotions to empathise would have a condition based on emotions. She learned that although they were different they were within her, Lena had been the one to explain it to her, she manage to teach her through music, getting her to explain the sensations that she felt and what they meant, she had been instrumental in Lex’s ability to fit in with society and do as her mother wanted, to keep her issues hidden. 

Lex unlike others on the spectrum had to live with the knowledge that she was not like other people that she didn't experience and understand emotion, that routine and patterns were the things that kept her stable. She just knew that when faced with her, people had strong and mostly dangerous emotions. She missed social cues at times and rarely understood humour although sarcasm she could spot on occation. There was an intelligence to it, a formula and she could spot it and appreciated it in a way that other humour just didn't penetrate her awareness. There had been some noise, nothing much more than the normal sounds of shift changed, locking up although there had been something that sounded more like high intensity lasers. Maybe it was a new treatment for the patients or a new containment some aliens needed different ways to hold them.

The door opening signified one of three things to Lex. It was either a incompitant nurse to fiddle with the machines and leave; that was the best option. Someone who had paid a guard or a nurse for the opportunity to get revenge on Lex Luthor, beatings were not allowed to her face but the rest of her was fair game. Her injuries would be kept secret and treated, the blanket covering her up to the neck. The third was the worst; this was always men, always men that to show her what real power was, to teach the infamous murdering lesbian what she was missing, the thing that would have put her right. This was the worst, not only was it not her preference but she had to live through it each face burned into her mind, each slobbering grotesque man sweating and thrusting over her lifeless body her mind trapped with no way to block out what happened. She wished that she could tense brace herself for the oncoming person, the newest arrival in her personal hell. The sound of the heels clicking on the floor of the room told Lex that it wasn't going to be the first or last option. Although some women had enough power and thirst for blood to beat a person lying in a bed; with no conscience, and people thought Lex was a monster.

Sanitarium (Metropolis) six months before Crisis on infinite Earths. Earth 74 19:55…….

Five minutes to shift change on 04-10-2019 that changed, it wasn't that Lex woke up, there was no change in her. However the doors to the secure hospital opened with force; instead of the normal complement of nurses and guards to replace the current staff, it was a big black man with a laser eye came in, flanking him either side were more cybernetic men. There was carnage as he blasted holes in the chests of the patients and nurses alike. No one was safe as people ran and scattered through the hall they fell one by one. Their deaths were quick and with military precision, barely a scream was registered on the ground floor as they made their way through to the bank of elevators in the back. The cybernetic men entered them and the door closed. 

The sound of expensive leather heels clicking across the lobby stepping over the dead bodies heading to the elevators, the radiating sound breaking through the silence like an echo in a cave. The clean white tiles covered in the blood of the people that worked in the establishment. The woman taking no notice of the carnage that laid before her collateral damage nothing more, nothing of any consequence. There were stories of what they had done in that place, there were atrocities that should never be forgiven. It was a waste of potential experiments but she knew that things were changing and soon, soon she would have everything she needed. Starting with patient 29358-4, there were some other people of interest but there was only one that was needed.

Three floors up the patients all secured in rooms, the guards in position to ensure that none of the secure criminal masterminds were released. All watching the clock tick by tick waiting for the change, their relief to come. Coats on keys at the ready, watching as the lights flicked, first floor, second, third. The most secure of wards for the most devastating criminals, had a high number of guards, more than nursing staff, all waiting for the moment that the ding of the elevator sounded. The bell chimed and the lift opened, the guards all ready to leave stepped towards the lift, a nice tight bunch, close targets all standing in a neat line, the men inside the lift fired and the guards were dispatched as quickly as they registered that the oncoming people were not the relief staff. There was minimal noise, people were all congregating together waiting to leave, to get back to the real world. The nurses stood a little farther back Once his job was done the man stood to the side and waited. For the lift to return to the third floor.

The doors pinged once again and the woman stepped out surveying the bodies littering the ground by the elevator, she pursed her lip and looked at one of the guards.

“You missed one”

The black man looked down and shot a laser through the head of the moving guard and moved the body to clear the path for the tall woman. She stepped with purpose through the corridor and to the nurses station, looking at the board for the room that she needed. Paying no mind to the deviation, or the soon to be arriving team for the night. Once the room was found she looked at the man who had cleared her way.

“No one leaves, everyone in this place is guilty they all die, including the incoming now go, I need time alone with my daughter”

“Yes Mrs Luthor”

He nodded at the men and headed back down to dispatch the other staff and patience in the building, the other men with them had already begun the purge of the unit, their own men on the inside ensuring that no one would escape. He knew well that Lillian would not stand for any mistakes, or any loose ends.

Sanitarium (Metropolis) six months before Crisis on infinite Earths. Earth 74 20:00…….

Lex chose not to look, she was not sure that she wanted the shock that would come from whatever assault but she had learned that looking generally made people think she was aware and they would be more violent getting off on the additional thrill saying things that were repugnant. The clicking drew closer and there was a hand on her head brushing her hair from her. 

“Alexandra are you still in there?”

At the sound of her mother's voice she turned her eyes to look, her mother, older but it was her mother, her lips carved into a sardonic smile, her eyes narrowed the loombing frame standing over her as their eyes met for the first time in what must have been years. The recognition immediately hit Lillian, and her smile grew.

“It's time to bring you out of their Alexandra we have work to do, a new world to take over, you, you can finally be free”


	2. Lillian's twist in destiny?

Project 7734 (Metropolis) 09-18-2015 Earth 74 14:30……... 

Lillian sat in the bunker looking over the latest information regarding Alien sightings, she was still looking for that specific signature, the alien that would allow her to do what she needed. Lane was getting too close to really finding out what made Alexandra different and if he was able to know that he would be able to control her, and Lillian by association with her. Lillian was by no means the picture book mother, she didn't hug, didn't bake, didn't go to soccer matches and she definitely didn't talk about her feelings. There was none of that; she was no classic mother, but her children were well educated, raised in society with manners, etiquette and appropriate pursuits. Fencing, archery, art, playing instruments, ballroom dance, sailing, languages, chess, and of course philanthropic endeavors. She ensured that they had everything that they needed to take their place in the world and become the leaders of tomorrow the elite. She loved them in her own way, Lena was always the troublesome one wanting more than Lillian could give, never appreciating the advantages, always wanting the less useful things, praise and love. Lex however didn't need her to excel in everything, she always knew that Alexandra was brilliant Lvl 12 intellect.

Lillian had managed to get her brought to the 7734 project instead of Jail but there was a problem, Lane had come with her, she had not anticipated this, he had not interfered with the project before, once he had commissioned her to work on the Alien issues he had stayed out of it, not wanting to draw attention to the project or the secret mission behind it, bit something had changed and she wasn't sure what. He was now hell bent on being involved and defeating the latest super in town. Lillian couldn't understand why this one was suddenly his focus, maybe the misogynist thought that the female of the species would be easier to take down, she hated the presumption but there was nothing that she could do right now to dissuade him from being involved. As such she wanted the shape shifter to get Alexandra out of there. The thought that she could be manipulated by the mediocre mind of Lane was distasteful to say the least, but Lillian had to admit that she did have a weakness, Alexandra had always been her weakness. Lionel had not taken too their daughter, he called her defective, told her that she had been the reason that their child was a mute, defective. He refused to see the intelligence in the child.

Lillian had worked out how to communicate with her and taught her Morse code, as she studied her brain function, her hormonal changes, the neurotransmitters. Even this had not swayed Lionel and his view, she was not going to be labeled as a Luthor, then threatened to have her put in a sanatorium, to disown her, to make it like she had never existed. Lillian had never done anything less than perfectly, she was an exemplary example of class and sophistication, she was educated and had a genius IQ of her own. She would not allow this man to suggest that she had created something defective. She had set about to prove that not only was Alexandra was not defective but that she was brilliant beyond belief. She had treatments that unlocked her daughter, given her the ability to speak, to move forward. She wasn't sure if the emotional instability or the other issues with sensory were always there, although the way Alexandra had always screamed at touch suggested that it wasn't something that she had done. Regardless, she would not allow Lane to realize what power could be wielded by toying with her daughter.

Finally there was a report of the right frequency and she would need to go, to track this alien down before it was too late. The problem was the tornado test, it was due the next day, she needed to delay it, she needed to speak to Lane. The ability to shift was something that he wanted in his weapon, maybe that would be enough for him to delay to give him a better chance at killing the super. She picked up the report and headed to the office Lane kept within the project site. As always she walked with graceful purpose, her head high and determination etched on her face, the others moved out of her way as she commented on the area as her own. She arrived at the door and knocked before moving into the office.

“It is customary to wait to be called to enter Lillian, I thought your upper class attitude would translate to that level of etiquette at least, not to mention that I am the commanding officer of this project. I am not one of these minions that you keep around to scurry and fear your almighty Luthor presence.”

Lillian despised this man he was elevated to a position that his intellect did not reach, and with his beliefs she had no idea how he wasn’t segregated from society, one thing could be said for him, he knew how to cover his back, how to move the blame and ensure that none of his failures came back on him. Lillian had been sure to capture each and everyone, she was not someone to be toyed with, she was superior in every way to the pompous arrogant troglodyte. She stood to full height towing over the small man, her sardonic smirk pulling at her lips and the cool indifference in her eyes completed the matriarch's stoic facade.

“As you are well aware I have been running this project for over two years without your direct supervision which is not needed, and you gave two very distinct orders with your first briefing. The top priorities were the tornado, and a shape shifting alien, any information on either of these things were to be brought to you without delay, regardless of what you were doing. I am merely following orders, General.”

“Well now that is a surprising development, you actually doing anything that was a direct order, Lillian”

Lane sneered at her, he didn't trust this woman, he didn't like her, but he needed her, to keep her daughter in check, he knew the use of her name was petty but he didn't care the woman had burst in on him with out invitation and sited his own words to mitigate her disrespectful behavior. Internally Lillian cursed the man, how dare he think that he had the right to call her Lillian, she raised her brow and put the papers on the desk looking down on the overweight grotesque man that Lane was with contempt.

“That's Mrs Luthor or Dr Luthor, General, we have been over this. I am going to get the final piece to your weapon, and you need to delay the testing until I return”

Lane looked at her she was always making demands above her station, she thought that the Luthor name, that her intelligence made her more than what she was, her and that odd daughter of hers, he couldn't deny that Alexandra was brilliant, that she saw things in a different way, but the woman was odd even for a Luthor, Lillian hid what she were doing with her, it was easy when it was sporadic, but recently it had been more frequent, whatever she was doing to her daughter was lasting less and less time. With Lillian gone he could find it out, take over the control of Alexandra and by association this thorn in his side, this egocentric woman who looked down on him.

“I will arrange the delay. The shifting will give the tornado the edge that we need to rid ourselves of that kryptonian menace for good. I will put Alexandra on integration so she can modify the tornado for the new power while you are gone, and arrange for a team to go with you”

“A team will not be necessary, Henshaw is all I need.”

Lillian didn't trust him, but with Hank she should be able to get to the alien and back by the time that the test would start, she would be cutting it close. She needed the shapeshifter to get Alexandra out, this was the closest she had come to it. She couldn't let it slip through her fingers now. Less intervention from Lane meant that she would work fast and smart. Henshaw was loyal and that was what she needed. She turned and headed out of the office.

The glades (Miami) 09-18-2015 Earth 74 19:23……... 

Lilian had tracked the alien with Henshaw, she didn't like Miami any more than Florida or other hot sticky locations, it was degrading to be reduced to a sweating mess. Nothing worse than wading through the hot sickly pools of the glades looking for this alien, Henshaw had to dispatch a number of alligators and other predators during their search, but finally the readings were converging on a point ahead. They struggled through the glades and moved towards the signal, Henshaw taking the lead as he pushed the seagrass out of their path. The long tendrils wrapping around Lillian’s legs as she walked, her natural revolution to the warm wet slimy plants touching her momentarily put to the side, she didn't spare a thought for the other things that could be finding their way onto her skin, she clenched her jaw as she pushed forward, Henshaw telling her to wait as he rounded on the alien.

Henshaw left her standing to the south of the alien as he circled around, he hated aliens, hated the way they took over and threatened all that he believed in. how that impostor has taken his place. He relished in the hunt, in the kill but this time would be different. He had to take this one alive, he didn't know what Lillian had planned but he trusted her, she had saved his life, made him stronger and better equipped to deal with these aliens. As he approached he felt the wind shift, coming from the south, his eyes opened wide as he realized that Lillian was no longer safe. He moved quickly hoping that he could take down the alien before he noticed Lillian, cutting through the tall grasses with his laser, stealth no longer being a priority he just needed to draw the alien to him, to ensure that Lillian was not discovered.

As the wind shifted the alien could smell a change, danger alerting him to the presence, not a predator, as such but something, he shifted his position and could see the woman, she was tall, imposing, but looked annoyed, aggrieved, she was staring at him with narrowed eyes waiting, there was someone else. He shifted his perception and heard the lasers. This was a predator, he needed to escape, the woman was the lesser of two threats and he moved toward her. His change of direction alerted the woman and she pulled out a weapon of some description. She took a stance and he knew it was time to leave. He crossed his arms and started to phase out, creating a portal.

Lillian saw him shifting; she wasn't losing him not now, she needed him to free Alexandra, she forged forward as the portal opened and lunged forward trying to grab the alien, falling through the portal, which vanished along with the Alien. Henshaw watched, running forward, this was not a shapeshifter, the signature was off he had realized that but this, this was something else. He called out to Lillian to stop but it was too late, she was gone, and so was the alien.

Alley behind CATCO plaza (National City) 11-18-2019 Earth prime 15:00……... 

Lillian found herself dressed in her suit with her long tan overcoat standing in an alley. She was confused as to what happened but she was not one to allow the unexpected circumstances to throw her, she was better than that, maybe the alien had more than just shape shifting abilities, something that induced hallucinations. She moved through the alley trying to get some bearings on where she was, seeing the infamous sign of the CATCO building she realized that she was in National city, she picked out a paper from the stand and looked at the date. This was not possible, she was three and a half years in the future. The headline reads Lex and Lena Luthor, remodel the DEO, hope and justice prevails. The future was bright it would appear, Lex the head of the DEO, she hated that stupid nickname she had given herself but this was at least a good thing, the Luthor's were finally in a position to make a difference.

She decided to pay her daughters a visit, if anyone could help her get back it would be them, and it appeared that they had enough power behind them to do so now. A small smirk filtered onto her face, her progeny had done well. She saw a man approach her.

“Mrs Luthor, the car is waiting, to take you to your meeting at Luthor Corp”

She nodded and went with the man to the town car waiting and slid into the back. She was finding this new future something to very much look forward to. The car pulled from the curb and headed through the traffic. Pulling up to the building Lillian's door was opened and she entered the elevator, the operator selecting the top floor.

Penthouse Luthor Corp (National City) 11-18-2019 Earth Prime 15:30………

Alexander Joseph Luthor had been working with the Anti-Monitor and had taken over the new world after the paragons fought through the crisis. His intellect allowing him to not only look upon the book, but open it, he had been able to change it, there was nothing more to it than that, all the planning all the schemes, the tech and the attempts to take out the man of steel and all he had to do was flick a grateful script over the book of destiny, once the page was out any fool could look upon it, but it took genius, it took Lex to change the course of time, to laugh in the face of destiny itself to become what he always was the man of tomorrow. Of course no one had been able to revel in his brilliance with him, he couldn't tell Lena, he had her working on things, balance was needed, she still felt the pull towards that annoying blonde. If he had not needed her to help create the one earth she wouldn't have survived. He couldn't wait to have his mother with him, he would be able to tell her of his brilliance, mesmerize her with his genius and deception, worthy of the Luthor name.

As the elevator opened Lillian stood out, she looked up to see a man looking back at her, she thought to start that this was someone waiting to greet her, a receptionist of a fashion, Alexandra’s assistant, she had always leaned towards men as she found them easier to read. She placed the classic Luthor superiority on her face as she stepped forward.

“Mother finally, I thought that you would never get here, I have so much to tell you, there is nothing that I can share with Lena, she is not a believer like you, and well she has to close a connection with the super, but now, now I can finally explain the simplicity in my brilliance, the eloquence of my plan to someone that will truly appreciate it.”

Lillian instantly realized two things she was not on her earth, the multiverse theoretical no more, this was Lex, a male version of her daughter, she moved in and sat down on the chair crossing her legs and looking at her “son” she needed to play it smart if she was going to be able to get back to her earth, and maybe she could get some ideas about how this future came to pass. She could see that this version liked to talk about his own self importance, it was interesting, her Alexandra who would only talk when forced, who spoke in monologues about inventions or science but little for human connection, and here this version seemed to like nothing more than to converse about his brilliance.

“Lex where are your manners? I taught you better than that, etiquette dictates a drink before we discuss your accomplishment, seeing the headlines today I am sure that this is going to be quite the momentous moment, maybe a champagne to celebrate.”

Lex had waved in grand gestures and collected the drink, quite pleased by his mother's suggestion of celebration. He spoke at length about his brilliance, being brought back from the dead, taking the book, killing supermen all through the multiverse, changing the page so that once the antimatter destroyed the world he would be there with the paragons, his deception and plans, his use of Lena, everything came tumbling out in a long monologue. How the multiverses were no longer in effect but there was now an earth that contained all that was left and they ruled it all. His writing on the pages, changed things, and once removed even if there was someone who could use the book, his changes could not be altered, he would always win. He was able to call her to him at that moment, once it was safe to have the whole family together again. As he was the only one with enough intelligence to read and change the book, she showed her the page with pride, his script calling her forth, now the Luthors could be together and take over. 

Lillian allowed his revelry and prideful boasting gathering the information that was needed, So it hadn't been the alien that brought her here, it was Lex, she couldn't be sure that it was just Lex, he would have meant his mother not her. She needed to alter things, to have her family be the ones that were here, but she needed to get back to ensure Alexandra was okay she needed to keep her stable and well, it would only take a couple of additions. Ensuring that she had a moment with the paper, she put a circle around the three names with the female alteration. In addition she wrote to send herself back, she wrote small and ensured that she was not sent back until the next day, Lex was too busy with his own self congratulations to notice the small alterations. Once Lillian was back the timeline would play out and instead of this vapid man, there would be her and her children taking over. Lillian smiled; this was definitely a stroke of luck, one any strategist would take to twist to her own desires. She had folded and handed back the paper.

“I always said that you were a genius my bright beautiful boy, this is the best gift a mother could be given, you really have become the hero this world deserves.”

Lillian just had to sit back and wait until tomorrow she would be back with Alexandra and they could plan for a very bright future.


	3. Destiny is a woman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So just for clarity within the story. Earth 74 and earth 39 have the same time line mostly. Lena has gone through cannon to SG, so even though it is technically not 39's Lena they have the same experiences with the exception of Lex season 4, where Lex was the one they were tracking down, this has changed it would have been Lillian in this reality (74) Lex would have been thought dead. 
> 
> The variation is Lex...... as follows
> 
> Lex - smallville relationship with clark - care accident - metta humans  
> \- comic influence 7734 - making of metalo-cyborge superman - lexo suit and worlds leading brain on  
> kryptonite 12th LVL intelect  
> \- Film inspitration - supercomputer/Lex's AI from superman 3 it takes over to protect itself.  
> \- Supergirl - red tornado was Lex - red sun was Lex - fight with superman
> 
> Personal twist - Aspergers syndrome, and Bipolar disorder.
> 
> I wanted to make this explicit, although bits will unfold in the story i wanted everyone to be able to understand it. thanks for reading.

Chapter 3: Destiny is a woman.

Lex Penthouse (Metropolis) 09-15-2019 Earth 74 09:00……... 

Lex stood looking out over the city, such a familiar landscape, her home, she had always loved the way the city forged above the horizon, imposing and impressive, showing the dreams of men that build it. She would miss the city, the way the light filtered into the penthouse, the soft and muted light at the beginning of day and at sunset. She had been there since sunrise it was her last day on earth 74 if her mother was right, following the liberation from the sanitarium Lillian had given Lex more treatments, eventually finding the right mix to free her from the prison of her own body, although it had not been easy, the treatments leaving her more unstable than before, and the time languishing in a hospital bed leaving her body fragile, her muscles atrophied and her recovery slow and painful.

She had discovered that her mother had taken over Cadmus, and as always her own quest for power and dominance had distracted her, as much as Lex had been the focus of her mother, her whole childhood living under a microscope, she was obsessive, and from time to time a new obsession would take over. This time was often good for her, time away from the constant assessments, treatments and singular focus of her mother. This time however the years that it took between Lex being put into the sanatorium and the time Lillian had finally come for her was the worst, there had been the time before the car crash, the attempt on her life. Her depression caused her to want to terminate her existence, that was what it was called. She had survived and become obsessed with why; how her carefully planned and executed methodology interrupted by an unknown variable. This was thought to be the worst of it until the latest, the other times seen Lex’s Manic phases, stopped when her playgirl activities finally made too much press and her mother would intervene.

In the three and a half years of hell Lex had suffered through Lillian had tried to kill all the aliens in the national city, had framed Lena and alienated her more from the family, fought Daxamites and taken all the praise for thwarting the invasion. She had been elevated in her stature and became even more egocentric; although Lex wondered if that was possible, it seemed that it was. Her mother had clearly heard about the things that had happened, she could have walked in at a reasonable time and taken Lex legitimately, the carnage she witnessed as she was wheeled out and the papers reporting the atrocity showed that Lillian had been there not just to collect her but to take revenge on people who dared to believe that they had the right to cause harm to her project. Her own revenge was less bloody but no less brutal, every face burned into her mind was tracked, and a string of disappearances, she had come up with a perfect solution to her mind, death was too good for these people, the only one left to take her revenge on was Lane, but he would have to wait, her revenge slowed by the four months that she spent learning to walk and building her strength.

If her mother's plan was not found, and things happened as she believed this would be the last day she would be here, there would be a period that she stopped existing, while the crisis for infinite earths took hold, and then she would be transported to the new earth, she wondered when it would happen, how it would feel to enter a void of nothingness, she looked to the skyline and could see the start of the Antimatter wave, she took a deep breath, and waited, wondering what this new world would be like, and if she would be able to get Lena back. Kara Danvers, Supergirl had taken Lena from her, her mother told her that she wanted nothing to do with them but that this would be sorted with the new world. Lex never understood why Lena had turned her back on her; they were so close, but from the moment the fight with superman happened she was gone. She could feel the strangest sensation, her body began to almost vibrate and she watched as she seemed to phase out of existence. Her last tangible thought was of Lena before there was nothing.

Penthouse Luthor Corp (National City) 11-19-2019 Earth Prime 11:30………

Alexander Luthor sat in his superiority, revealing over the brilliance of his plan, the simplicity in how he took over the world. He had spent the morning in the DEO taunting Alex, and then found an opportunity to taunt Supergirl talking into a dictaphone and walking away to watch her turn it to dust. He was untouchable, he was the king of the world. He laughed as he poured his glass of scotch and moved to the window, looking over the city, National city his new base, not as advanced as metropolis but still it was by his own creation. Superman played god, thought his powers meant he was better than humans; he was the god, he was the one that had created the new world tricked the paragons and changed destiny his mother was right, he was the man of tomorrow, the hero the world deserved, and the supers would bow before him. He picked up his glass to take a well deserved draw on the perfect aged scotch.

His hand was shaking, vibrating, he felt the strange pull from within his body, the feeling of his molecular structure being changed, pulled, distorted. The book, someone had changed something. The feeling he recognized from replacing the paragon, from coming back through the crisis, taking his place. No one was intelligent enough to use the book, he had ensured that Brainy wasn't a threat, the only other living twelfth intellect in the universe. His eyes wild as he watched his body phase, grabbing for the draw, the page, this was the only part of the book that could be changed by a mediocre individual he kept it close, taking it out he scanned over the page nothing had changed, he managed to turn it, his body not completely solid and could see the writing on the back.

“Mother”

He spat out the word, the accusation, the realization, the words the letter she wasn't his mother reaching for the pen to delete. Lex fell forward over the desk phasing out into nothing.

Penthouse Luthor Corp (National City) 11-19-2019 Earth Prime 11:35………

Her awareness started to return, confusion, she was being pulled back from the nothingness of the void, anger and disbelief washed over her as he passed into the void to take her place in nothing as she felt her body phasing back into being, laying over a unfamiliar desk gripping a pen and looking at the page, the page of the book that had caused all this. Her mother had told her that it needed to be maintained, it needed to be safe, or everything would unravel. She took it in her hands seeing the past the present the merging of the multiverses everything that was planned in motion, Lena would be here, she would have no memory of this being a different world she would have to know that the other Lex was not her, that this wasn't right that the things she had been doing for him, were not what she had put in motion, she made a small amendment to the page so that Lena would know the point the time line changed, that he had manipulated her that she was her sister not his. No one else would ever know that Lex had ever been a man, it would mean that she was guilty of all the things that he had done, being the most hated person in her world was one thing now she would be the most hated in the new world the multiverse; or what was left of it.

She then decided that it was time to do as she was told she found the items needed and laminated the page, it was a start; she would work on something that would preserve it and encase it without damage for eternity, after all anyone could use it now. She looked around and, finding a bio metric lock placed her hand on it, it opened a safe and she placed the page inside locking it. No one knew about it except her mother, and for now Lex had other plans. First revolving around Lena and finding her sister and explaining the impending danger, the female super was important to Lena, and as much as Lex wanted her sister back without the super, she knew that if anything happened to her Lena would never forgive her, it seemed that no matter what Earth that they ended up on Lena and Kara would be linked. She needed to help Lena take down Leviathan; Lex wouldn't be fulfilling her part but it did mean Andrea needed to be stopped.

Lena’s office (National City) 11-19-2019 Earth Prime 13:00………

Lex had made it to the building and using all the blind spots in the security, she had made her way through the people and to Lena’s office she was now sitting on the couch waiting for Lena to arrive. It would be the first time in years that she had actually seen her sister, since the moment that she was taken from court to 7734. She hadn't come to see her, had not come to find her when she was in the sanitarium everything was different there was a divide in the closeness that Lex remembered. She needed Lena, she knew that Lena didn't need her the same way but she kept her stable, she felt better when Lena was around, and she missed her when she was not there. The gap felt in her heart when Lena wasn’t there was hard to carry. She had come to understand that the feeling was love, that she cared deeply for Lena and that when she was not around she felt off. She wasn't sure how Lena would feel about her being here, especially as there was all the interference from the male version of herself. The door opened and Lena walked into the office.

“About time Little sister I have been waiting for you.”

Lena had been in the lab working on the project Lex had assigned her when the strange feeling hit her, there was a moment where she was overwhelmed with a pain in her head worse than any migraine that she had ever had, then there was two versions of reality in her mind, she had been working for Lex but he was a man, her sister was not there, she had no idea what was going on, she stopped working and decided that she must be low in sugar or something she finished up and headed to her office, the world was off but at the same time it was the same, she was in a position that she was not comfortable with, her live had shifted some how. As she opened the door and stepped inside she saw her sitting on the couch, she heard Lex speak, her sister was back instead of this strange version of Lex, he had been a vapid egocentric madman, not what she remembered of her sister. She needed to get her bearings and get some understanding of what was happening.

“Lexi, you could have had my assistant call down to the lab, or come down if you wanted an update on the project”

Lex curled her lip and raised her brow looking at Lena. She wasn't sure if her amendments had taken effect, she seemed to recognize her, used her nickname, but she appeared to think that Lex had been the one to set things in motion. She stood and smiled walking towards the younger woman and placed a hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze to ensure that this was indeed Lena and she was not hallucinating. The treatment still had an impact on her mind, not always able to focus and function; A second squeeze and she was sure that this was indeed Lena and she was here with her, Lex relaxed a little her body relieving itself of tension and her smile coming easier to her face. Now she needed to know if she was able to understand what had happened.

“Well little sister that would have been an idea; I should have announced my presence, checked in with security or allowed everyone to see that I was here. I must say the security is lacking in this building sister it is almost as if you are inviting trouble. Tell me Lena bean are you still working on the project for him? Do you realize what has happened?”

A flash over the younger Luthor's face was momentarily present and then controlled, as she realized that this was indeed her sister, that what ever happened had something to do with the reappearance of Lexi, she had not seen her since the trial, some accident to containment had supposedly killed her, then she was here in this place and Lexi was here, but the man before was also Lex but not her Lex. The time lines and different earths slowly slotted into her mind like a convergence of two highways, melding into one in her mind, although she was not sure what happened or why it was clear that Lex did. She raised her brow and looked at her sister, it had been so long she wanted to hold her to see that she was doing well, where she had been, and where were they now, who the hell was the other Lex.

“As you own the building, run the company and the DEO I am sure that you could have easily announced yourself, you wouldn't have been kept waiting and you would probably have a drink in hand.”

Lex saw the small micro gestures on Lena’s face as whatever needed to be completed reached fruition but there was not acknowledgment from her, instead she placed the Luthor facade on her face and made that inane statement, still trying to postulate what was happening, Lex needed to get things moving in the right way, she didn't want to be in this new universe alone, she was content being alone for the most part but she needed Lena, and the male versions plan was still in effect, she had to help Lena save the super, losing her would cause unimaginable pain to her sister, and Lex couldn’t have that. Lex laughed lightly at Lena, they were always caught in this game of chess countering and posturing, there was always something new for them to play.

“Lena bean I have missed you and I have never lied to you, I don't think that a game of cat and mouse is the most effective way to go about this, there are things that are happening beyond our control, and I need to fill you in; so if you want to save your flying blonde and move forward then I suggest that you stop trying to deceive and work out my next move because I am more than happy to tell you. I am aware that you hate me and that you didn't come to see me since the trial but, even though you don't want me in your life I would never hurt you”

Lena looked at Lexi and a small smile pulled at her lips, this really was her Lexi but she couldn't understand how she had survived or where she had been for the near four years since the trial. She didn't know why she thought she hated her, she had mourned the loss of her sister every day, in her reality which was swayed with this new information she looked into her eyes and could see the sister she loved staring back at her, she was here. What did she mean about Kara, this timeline like her own, they were not friends she had done horrible things to her, she didn't think that Kara could ever forgive. She could see Lexi waiting and moved closer to hold her slinging to her with all her strength she knew that Lexi needed and let out a sigh of relief, happiness she wasn't sure what.

“Kara would never forgive what I have done, but even if she won't I will not see her hurt Lexi. Where have you been? I was told you died in transit to the containment facility following the trial. I missed you, hell I even mourned you, that man was not you, he was cruel and evil the things he has done.”

Lex held her sister in a tight embrace, she never thought that this would be the outcome of the visit. The thought that Lena had been separated from her because she was told she was dead, the years locked into her own body, Lena could have helped her could have gotten her out. Why would mother lie to her about this, thoughts swirled in her mind over and over, she was finding it hard to combat all the thoughts and the intrusions, she started to recite her numbers over and over in her mind. Muttering them, lightly 14372, 275736, 47264. Lane, the project, the trial, superman, everything beating in on her, too much too quickly. Lena heard the mumbles and knew that this meant Lex was struggling that she needed to ground her; she held tighter, never telling her to stop the more pressure on her mind the worse that Lex got, clearly the question about where she had been was causing this. Once Lex had calmed Lena slowly let her go, stepping back to allow Lex to come back to herself.

“The male version has a plan in effect and that will once again fall at my feet, I could get taken again, but I will not let them hurt you, and hurting her will hurt you Lena”

Lena thought about this, Lex being taken, when she had not done anything was not acceptable to her, she looked at her and placed her hand on Lexi’s shoulders. 

“They can not take you if you are innocent Lex”

“Innocent is such a relative term, I am not professing to be innocent, just that the intention behind the actions were Misconceived, the original intention warped, and unexpected variables caused issues that couldn’t be taken into consideration at conception. The times lines are similar, the car accident in smallville, the fight, the red sun, even the tornado and Metalo only here he did it, on our earth it was a manipulation however both of us are guilty for our creations”

Lena knew that Lexi as brilliant as she was did not deal in morality, or purpose just things that sparked curiosity, she had no interest in power in its literal term just the knowledge and ability to create, she paid little attention to the workings of those around her because it was something that she didn't understand. She knew about Lexi’s diagnosis and had grown up with her difficulties; she didn't want to see her sister hurt.

“Tell me everything”

The conversation was long and it took a toll on Lex but the conclusion Lena knew that she had to go to Kara and repair the damage to take down leviathan and to stop the final part of the crazed Lex’s plan. She also knew that Lexi is not faring well, she recognized the signs, the counting, the tapping of her fingers she was losing her stability, she could end up in a depressive or manic phase.

“Lexi tell me what I can do to help you, I can see you're struggling, I don't want to save her and lose you again please what do you need?”

“I think that it is time to find mother for another treatment, I have needed her help more and more since Lane and his interference”

Lena was horrified at the thought of Lexi having to rely on treatments from their mother, she was not to be trusted, clearly, she had told lena that Lex was dead and Lex that lena didn't want to see her, the time in the sanitarium and the outcome of that all because Lex was left unprotected. She didn't know everything Lex had shut down a number of times during the talk but all in all the life her sister had led was not one she would have wished on her worst enemy, she wasn't going to let this cycle continue she would find a way to balance Lex without the barbaric treatments. ETC, hormone blockers, neuro inhibitors, it was amazing that Lex had managed to function at all.

“I'm going to fix this Lexi, I promise I will find another way. Neither of us need to live with the Legacy she had given us, and this needs to stop.”

“I need it, now; I can't wait for you to find an alternative Lena; I won't be locked in again, but I will come to you when you have something, now you need to help Kara.”


	4. Small olive branches

Chapter 4: Small olive branches

Lena’s penthouse (National City) 13-03-2020 Earth Prime 23:45………

Lena had followed Lexi’s instructions, and they had managed to take down Leviathan, not Lex though as she had removed her involvement, the super friends had not been happy that Lex was not guilty and couldn't be taken out of the way, she had kept quiet about the involvement and came to a uneasy civility with Alex, nothing major but she wasn't actively trying to kill her so that was good. Her and Kara had agreed after everything that they would both take a little time. It pulled at her heart, although she knew what she had done, it wasn't her, and she would never have done that, not in her right mind, but then she wasn't, she needed Kara to understand that she was insane with the pain, not that it took the actions away. She loved Kara more than anything and even though she had never told her in either reality both of them seemed to love the sunny blonde. She had been furious when she found the deception but she still couldn't have killed her, she just wanted to have her feel some of the paint that she had, to hurt her, to show her, but she regretted it now, so much it ripped her heart in two. She stood in the penthouse looking at her phone, the text message written over and over but not sent. 

Lexi had been supportive even though she could tell that she didn't much like the super, Lexi didn't like either of them to be fair. Looking down at her phone she felt like a teenager, and she wasn't even confessing her feelings just that she missed her and wanted to meet. Stood in front of the floor to ceiling windows, so aptly reflecting the emptiness back at her Lena couldn't take it any longer, she may not be able to have Kara as her girlfriend but she could have her back as a friend.

Lena Luthor - Kara Danvers: I miss having lunch with you, I don't suppose you're free tomorrow?

Kara’s Loft (National City) 13-03-2019 Earth Prime 23:45………

Sitting looking out of the window of the apartment, Kara struggled with her heart and her mind. Lena had come back, she had apologised, she had told her how she felt, helped her and the others take down leviathan, on top of that she had talked down Andrea and saved her when she was vulnerable. She missed Lena, Listening to her heart beat gave her that familiar desire to see her.

“It's wrong and I won’t do it” She told herself, however some days She wished she could; just a peek just watch for a little while, to see her smile or watch her read, to know she was safe and ok. It had been weeks since the tentative talk in the DEO; being able to hear her heart rhythmically beating; wherever Kara was in the city with no effort, She was just so attuned to it; was a blessing and a curse, always there but out of reach.

When she is sad and stressed, She listens to her heart and longs to see her but Kara won’t misuse her powers, and Lena showed no sign of wanting to see her. The thing that was making her the saddest was also the comfort, it was a hard line to walk. There was a beep and she looked at her phone, her heart racing when she saw Lena looking back at her. An invitation and olive branch? She immediately typed back.

Lena’s penthouse (National City) 13-03-2020 Earth Prime 23:45………

Lena had watched the message send then deliver and then the final read notice. She knew it was silly to watch after all there was no reason to believe that Kara would be so close to her phone or that she would respond straight away she held her breath and her heart rate had increased. She could see the three bubbles suggesting that Kara was responding, she knew that this behaviour was that of a love sick teenager but above all else, she wanted the closeness, the friendship back. She loved Kara and was in love with her. She knew that but there was also the friendship forged over four years that she didn't want to lose. The phone beeped and the message appeared. Her heart racing she looked at the phone nervously as to what Kara had said.

Kara Danvers - Lena Luthor: I miss you too, shall I bring BBB?

A wave of happiness filled the Luthor as she read the message, Kara agreed she wanted to see her too, she fumbled with her phone her heart racing and hands shaking as she started to type back, she would see Kara tomorrow, for the first time in ages she felt hopeful she managed to type out a message. Kara has been listening, of course she had, the alert from the phone caused a spike in Lena’s heart rate, she was anxious about reading what Kara wrote, she didn’t like that this was her reaction, she used to have the excited flutter when Kara messaged; the kryptonian had allowed herself on occasion to fantasize that it was a sign of love.

Kara’s Loft (National City) 13-03-2019 Earth Prime 23:46………

She put her phone in her pocket and tried to think about anything else, her love for Lena would never be returned. She shook her head any chance that it could be; long gone now. She waited listening as Lena steadied her heart and then there it was the little flutter, Kara smiled to herself she was happy Kara agreed. It took everything she had not to fly to her right now, she wanted to see her, but she had said tomorrow. She took the phone that vibrates in her pocket out and looked at it.

Lena Luthor - Kara Danvers: That would be great, I haven't had BBB in ages, your office or mine?

Kara read the message and started to worry this was nothing unusual when it came to interactions with Lena, never sure that she was answering as just a friend or if her words could give her away, she wanted to say that she would go to lena, that she could pick her up and they could fly to Paris, Rome, anywhere that they woman desired, that as long as they were meeting Kara would be happy, but she knew that was not a friend reply. They were trying to get back to friends, maybe they needed a natural ground. She typed her response and sent it to Lena. Kara had second guessed herself almost the moment that she sent it, the park, it was neutral and maybe that would be better, although she wanted Lena to be comfortable. She knew how much Lena was beating herself up, and she hated thinking that there was a part of Lena that wouldn't forgive herself, Kara had forgiven her, she hoped that Lena could forgive the lies that she had told. She typed a second and sent it. Was the string of emojis too much?

Lena’s penthouse (National City) 13-03-2020 Earth Prime 23:46………

Lena heard the beep, Kara was getting back to her quickly, she wondered if she was as excited at the prospect of seeing her as Lena was, it felt like it, the urgency in her own heart seemed to be mirrored in the speed at which Kara was responding. She finally looked down at the message from Kara.

Kara Danvers - Lena Luthor: I am not sure that either office is right to meet up, am I not still banned (winky face) I am not sure if you're ready to see Andrea or if that would put too much pressure on this, how about the park? (emoji stream Zany faces, grinning faces”

Lena looked at the message she had not thought about the location as much as just wanted to see her. Lena was contemplating the location proposed there were very few places in the city that didn't make Lena think of Kara, it was like everything in the past four years had intertwined their lives so completely. She decided to agree, the park was nice. Then there was a second beep and Lena went back to the messages to open and have a look.

Kara Danvers - Lena Luthor: You know what it’s, it’s fine your choice Lena, I am happy to be having lunch, you should pick the place and I will bring the food (Emojis - happy face, burger, salivating smile, woman face palming)

Lena laughed out loud it was the first time in what felt like a very long time, the sound bubbled forth from her lips like a small unstoppable wave of happiness. Kara was such a dork she loved it, the string of nonsensical emojis accurately portraying her emotion behind the text, she loved how she could elicit emotion in her, before Kara she felt empty devoid of feeling, but Kara just seemed to make the world a brighter place. She responded in kind and smiled as she slipped down onto the chair.

Kara’s Loft (National City) 13-03-2019 Earth Prime 23:47………

Kara waited looking at her phone and the three dots that meant Lena was typing, it was amazing to her that something as unimpressive as three small dots on her screen could fill her heart with such joy. An algorithm programmed into the phone to eliminate the dots one at a time, in a rhythmic pattern, something so small so commonplace was filling her heart with joy. She watched as they bounced and listened to Lena’s heart with a smile on her lips. She laughed when finally the dots reversed and words replaced them, not just words Lena had placed an emoji too. 

Lena Luthor - Kara Danvers: The park sounds great, I think it would be nice to get out of the office, and of course see you, I am looking forward to it, see you tomorrow. (smile emoji, heart eyes)

Lena was happy with the park, she sighed softly it wasn’t long to wait, but the expanse of time before her felt like an eternity. She had been patient, not something that she was good at it, now that Lena had offered a small olive branch she couldn't contain her excitement. The level of nervous energy was palpable in the air she decided to send one more message and then as there was no way she was going to sleep tonight, at the very least not yet, she decided on patrolling, she could maybe get rid of some of the nervous energy she had, so much rested firmly on tomorrow’s lunch and she wanted it to go well.

Lena’s Penthouse (National City) 13-03-2019 Earth Prime 23:47………

Lena sat in her chair looking out towards the city, towards downtown, towards the woman that pulled her heart. Her phone was cradled in her hand close to her chest. She couldn't help but feel that this was her chance to get back to feeling, back to knowing that the world would once again make sense. The phone beeped and vibrated in her hand, she sighed happily and looked down at her phone.

Kara Danvers - Lena Luthor: Looking forward to seeing you too, sleep well Lena (smiley face)

Lena thought that this would actually be a possibility for the first time since Lexi explained what was happening, since she had to take on the responsibility for the things Lena and Lex had done. She had been mad at Kara but even though she knew that she would never forget she had forgiven her almost instantly it was her pride that has kept them apart, her anger the pain, the feeling of betrayal, logically her mind understood and she would never have been able to hold it against her, but the emotions so strong she had been acting on them. Saving Kara from Leviathan had helped but there was still so much ground to cover to get back to where they were, she didn't allow herself to hope for more but she knew that Kara in her life would make it better in any role. She pulled herself up from the chair and made her way to her room, the relief the removal of anxiety leaving her suddenly tired. She completed her routine and settled into her bed to sleep, a small smile on her lips and the promise of tomorrow's meeting settling on her heart.

Andrews Cafe, Luthor Corp Plaza (National City) 14-03-2019 Earth Prime 07:00………

Lena was up and ready to go by the time her alarm went off, she was more rested than she had been in a while, her sleep restful and without nightmares, she was happy to have the chance to see Kara for lunch but first she had finally tracked down Lexi. Lena knew that Lexi was a creature of habit, routine being the most important part of keeping herself stable. She knew where she would be every day for dinner, there was a different standing reservation in a different restaurant every night, all paid for discretion, all picked for Lexi’s own needs, access, staff regularity and the ability to have her regular meals. Mornings were the same although it was one place Andrews Café, she wasn't sure why Lexi had breakfast everyday outside Luthor Corp but she did. So she found herself at the small Café, she went through the door and looked around not seeing Lexi, she decided that she would grab herself something to eat and drink, she was sure that this was the right place, and Lexi always had breakfast at seven in the morning. She ordered food and then turned to see Lexi sitting in a booth.

She took her food and moved towards the booth, the placement was perfect and she knew instantly why Lexi had chosen the spot. She moved to sit opposite her sister and smiled brightly. She watched as Lexi smiled back an easy smile, it told Lena that she was currently quite stable and doing well. She was happy to see that whatever her mother had done was holding and that she wouldn't have to submit to that, wouldn't have to have another round of ECT and whatever her mother was lex had explained to her the pain, the groggy feeling the inability to know her own mind for a time after, how she was plagues with the thoughts and memories of the sanitarium and the issues with Superman. She hated that her mother would do that to her, Lexi had always been different if her mother could just accept that then maybe she wouldn't have tormented her so much.

From her vantage point Lex watched Lena come in, she knew that she would eventually, Lex wasn't hiding, she was just going through her life, every day she would have breakfast work in her lab and then go to the DEO, she didn't much like it there but it was a price she paid. She had learned from her past though, she didn't just sign things, not like at Luthor Corp where the board had leaked and sold her inventions to the government and tied her into a contract that caused her to become unstable and a prisoner of 7734. She couldn't bring herself to care about them, she didn't really have a moral or political standpoint so there were many that were not signed as yet she was hoping to ask Lena to help, especially as Lena had a vested interest and wasn't well, she wasn't Lillian who definitely had a political agenda. With Supergirl also wrapped up in it she wanted to make sure that Lena’s interests were protected. She often wondered about the bond that they seemed to share, wondering if it was more than Lena let on. However she would never push her sister to talking about that, not if she didn't want to, it also helped her, talking about her made her less stable.

“So little sister you have finally tracked me down, not that I have been hiding, but then I guess that things have been busy with.”

“Well I knew you had breakfast here, although I am not sure why it's quite a distance from the DEO, not that you seem to spend that much time there, how is running the DEO going? I know that it isn't really what you want to be doing?”

Lex contemplated Lena's words there was an interest in what Lex was doing there was a clear pattern of observation of her movements, was Lena observing for signs of instability, or just interested in her life, wanting to make more of a connection. Lex had not pushed the younger Luthor, she had a lot to deal with and very little time to do so, the merging of the time lines, the realization that Lex had always been there but kept from each other. Where Lex really was, and what happened, plus taking on Leviathan and trying to rebuild the relationship whatever that was with the Super.

“The choice of breakfast location is based on proximity to my secret lab, the place that I spend my time; out of the reach of the government and Mother. Your right the DEO is not something that I want to be doing, it is dangerous and I don't have the disposition for it any more than I did for Luthor Corp.”

Lena always appreciated the way that Lexi was direct, her lack of filter was something that her mother had always hated which made Lena love it more, she had not thought about Luthor Corp being something that Lexi had not wanted, she didn't want to be CEO either, and when that had been handed to her she was determined to change Luthor Corp. she had learned that Lexi had been just signing everything given, the direction, the decisions made by the board, most of which Lena had dispatched. Their direction was not in keeping with Lenas view; more Lillian’s she wondered who was pulling the strings at the DEO. she hoped that Lexi had learnt to look at the things first but she had always had a lack of understanding of the morality, the emotional and the political forces in play. It seemed that Lexi had found a place to feel comfortable and herself and that made Lena happy. She knew that the proximity meant that Lexi had a place close but she wasn't sure where that would be but Lexi loved to hide in plain sight.

“So your Lab is close, somewhere no one would expect you to be, is there a place in Luthor Corp that you have hidden your lab?”

“Close little sister, but that is too obvious, mother would anticipate that, it makes Logical sense that I would work from Luthor Corp, after I signed it over to you I wouldn't be expected to be, so being there would be hiding in plain sight but mother is too smart for that, and so are you little sister.”

Lena looked at her she was right that was the most obvious, but still Lexi would want to be close, she already knew that she could slip in and out without being noticed if she needs something she didn't have, but she would need to be close, but where, she thought about the typography of the area and then a small smile started to brim across her scarlet lips. It was brilliant, close to the most expected place for people who know Lexi to look, where she could see them, to give her time to leave or hide. Somewhere she could access and observe Luthor Corp and still have the distance to give her an additional layer of protection. It was Lexi; her brilliant self, always the additional move ahead.

“You’re under the building opposite, close but not too close, something that mother wouldn't think of, hiding under a rival company. Your brilliant Lexi but you know that, since you're so close maybe we can work together at some point.”

“Well it isn't quite what you have in mind but I could use your help with something, the paperwork at the DEO, the orders, I can't just sign everything I have no idea who is deciding on the direction and I am not planning to be in the same position as I was four years ago. It's not that I don't understand what they say; I just have no interest in posturing, politics or deciding what actions they take. Clearly he had aspirations outside of the Lab that I just don't and that is something that Mother would love. There have been a lot lately in regards to Supergirl, I do not think that I am best placed to make those decisions”

Lena looked at Lexi and nodded she knew that the interactions of people and how they were based on emotions confused her and that the less interest she had in something the less she was able to focus on it, it was like this from when they were small. Whenever mother would send them to Galas and cotillions Lex couldn't bear to be slobbered over by the elite boys of the supposedly eligible men. The information about Kara worried her a little, she knew that Lexi didn't like her, although unlike the rest of the world she knew that Lexi is not malicious or a monster, she just found the inconsistencies hard.

“I can help you with it, we can meet for breakfast and go over them, we could make it a regular thing, we can catch up with each other, deal with the paperwork and well, I missed you so much Lexi I want to be part of your routine again, as for Supergirl, please don't sign anything that could hurt her, she agreed to lunch and I think that we could finally be on the right track.”

Lex smiled and saw the slight flush as Lena mentioned the Kryptonian and the small but distinguishable twitch in the upper lip. On the left, an emotional response, there was definitely more to this relationship than Lena was giving her. She couldn't help but wonder if Lena was more like her than she realized. She smiled at Lena and checked her watch, she needed to get going but she wanted to stay. She hated it when there was this kind of decision.

“She is important to you isn't she, I can tell, I used to have someone that was important like that too, long ago before the accident, the only other person that I care for is you, so having you back in my life would be most agreeable. How about we meet Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday here for breakfast, we can go over the paperwork and you can tell me how things are going with Kara. Although now I have to go, I will see you Sunday Lena”

Lexi was up and gone before Lena had responded. She was used to that through, she knew it wasn't because Lexi didn't care just that she was on schedule. She smiled to herself Lexi was giving three days, she knew she preferred to eat alone to not have her routine disrupted, so that showed just how much Lexi loved her.


	5. Danvers sisters - Alex off balance.

Kara’s Loft (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

Kara woke early, the sun filtering through her window charging her cells, the slight buzz in her skin; the power filtering into her muscles pulling her from slumber. She stretched and moved in the bed rolling towards the light, she blinked a few times and remembered, excitement and anxiety filtering through her body as the sun's rays had moments ago.

“Lena”

She breathed the name out as her lips curled into a smile, she was up and ready in moments heading into patrol before going to Alex’s for breakfast, she had wanted to talk to Alex before meeting with Lena, there had been enough difficulties lately without keeping Alex out of the loop, she had a meeting with Lena tomorrow and if she heard from Lena that they met before Kara told her, that would be all kinds of awkward. Not to mention that Alex had been hostile towards Lena and she wanted to ensure that things went smooth, she wanted Alex on board, she wanted out of the DEO and more than anything she wanted to go back to how things were, not just with Alex, but with Lena too. It may only be a friend's thing, Lena may never love her back but, she would take a friendship with Lena over nothing everyday.

Alex’s Flat (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:20………

Alex didn't trust Lena, she didn't believe that she wanted to help, she had not forgiven her and had no intention of letting her hurt Kara again. She had helped in the defeat of Leviathan but she had convinced Kara this was not Lex, she didn't believe that either. Lex Luthor was less than human, a monster, something that had no morals, no thought for anyone or anything. Leaving Lex at the DEO had been a mistake, Alex had taken her position back for the mean time, so she could be sure that Lex didn't do anything to Kara, that she would have back up. Lena had offered to help with this, she didn’t want to work with either Luthor, however whereas Alex might have the skills to back Kara up, and a nice suit, she didn't have the money to fund the project, she could get a few good people from the DEO and create a supergirl back up team. Lena had suggested that she could supply a place to work from, tech and funding, that they could come to an agreement and Alex would be in control. Alex had worked with people she didn't trust, or like before, and would do whatever it took to to keep Kara safe. Nia and Kara had both convinced her to take a meeting and she would go but this just felt all wrong. There had already been a shift in Kara towards forgiveness of the younger Luthor, but they had distanced themselves from each other for now.

Her relationship with Kelly had fizzled out, there were just too many other things happening, although she didn't feel as broken as she expected, she did miss her; they had shifted to a place where they were friends. Their time together less and less romantic, Alex’s thoughts drifting more to the way it had been with Maggie, and she realised she was missing the passion that she felt for her first love when it came to Kelly. Kelly in return had helped her realise that her and Maggie were not the healthiest relationship, although full of passion had very toxic elements. She seemed to crave something that was not the safe option, her and Kelly were safe, the relationship was healthy, caring, they talked openly, Kelly helping with her father’s passing, but there was something missing, something that couldn't be worked on. Alex knew that there was no compromise when it came to passion and attraction, Kelly was amazing and Alex loved her but just not in that all consuming way that kept it going. Kelly had left the City and gone to help James, she knew that it was the best for her, maybe Alex was just destined to be alone.

She pulled herself from her melancholy after all there would be a bouncy sunny kryptonian arriving any moment, Kara had contacted her and asked to meet her for breakfast. They were still adjusting to the world after the crisis and the fallout of that, Kelly had helped, fought with them and it was great but Alex couldn't help but compare, she always felt safe with Maggie on her six with Kelly she felt like she needed to protect her. Alex tried to shake it off, it had been years since her and Maggie split she had no idea why she was playing on her mind, there was never closure exactly, they wanted different things and they split apart knowing they loved each other. Maybe it was just the recent split with Kelly making her nostalgic, making her think over her previous failed relationships. She started to pull together the ingredients to make pancakes and bacon, she needed to stop dwelling. It was putting her in a bad mood; not that it was hard since going back to the DEO she was practically constant in her mood. She finished up the breakfast as she heard the familiar flap of a cape. She turned to face the window and smiled at her sister, she must have just finished patrol.

“Hey Kara, Hungry? How was patrol?”

Kara stepped inside and she was really excited about lunch with Lena but she knew that Alex would be somewhat less impressed. She was still holding on to the Lena is evil thing and even though she agreed to let Lena help with the super friends base she wasn't really on board with Lena having anything to do with it, once established. Kara felt bad about that, it was ok for her to bankroll and invent as long as she was nowhere near. Lena seemed happy that they were letting her help at all, although that may have changed the tentative talk at the DEO about her doing this a while ago, and she was making connections again, Kara hoped that Alex would follow suit.

“Nothing I couldn't handle, last night and tonight were both mostly quiet, nothing Alien but a few things that I helped with. Hungry? Did you really just ask?”

Kara smiled brightly and moved closer, grabbing Alex for a hug as she pinched a strip of bacon. As much as she was anxious about the conversation they were about to have, Kara also noted that there was something a little off with Alex, she had been more surly lately, more unhappy, breaking up with Kelly going back to the DEO, everything was just moving backwards it seemed. Since the crisis and the takedown of Leviathan everything seemed off, it wasn't just the two timelines, the strange way that the world was now. It was more than that, Alex seemed a little restless.

Alex enjoyed the hug and melted into it a little something that still made her feel right, she had been feeling off, she just felt that there was something missing from her life, she thought it was the lack of progress becoming a mum, or the lack of passion in her relationship, maybe it was the job, she didn't want to be at the DEO any more, the time as a vigilante had been exciting, that had felt right to a degree. That was probably half of the reason she agreed to meet with Lena. she would still need a job though something flexible, she had savings but that wouldn't keep her going indefinitely.

“Ok let's eat, tell me what's new?”

“Well um, there is one thing I guess that's new, Lena contacted me last night, and well we are going to have lunch today.”

Alex looked at her. She couldn't believe this, so much for the time apart and this was just the icing on the cake today. Not only was she struggling with this low mood, constant thoughts of Maggie and the lack of purpose, now the Luthor was wheedling her way back into Kara, not enough that she was planning the super friends squad and behind that but now, if she and Kara were back to friends, well she wouldn't walk away.

“Kara what are you doing? I thought you two were taking time, I mean come on Kara she locked you in a kryptonite cage, almost shot you out of the sky with kryptonite cannons, and not to mention the deception and the attempts to manipulate you, are you sure you should be opening that door back up?”

Kara frowned, the crinkle becoming evident on her forehead as she looked at Alex, it wasn't like she had forgotten everything that happened, she just didn't want to discount all that Lena had done so easily as Alex, after all she helped with Leviathan and was helping create a super team so Alex and her could move away from the DEO. She looked up to her sister, azure eyes locking on to the hazel of Alex, looking into her eyes she could see the anger, frustration and the oh Rao that was disappointment. Kara swallowed hard and looked at her sister.

“I know what she did Alex, I was there, I was also there when she saved the world on more than one occasion, you know that I have no desire to remove Lena from my life, I have missed her, Alex you know how I feel about her, even if she doesn't feel the same, I don't want to lose someone I care about, I had to adjust to Astra, Dad and mother when I found out they were not all good. Lena was always honest that she felt she walked the edge, I hurt her and tipped her off that she is worth a second chance.”

Alex could feel her anger building she couldn't believe after all this Kara still loved her, that mean Lena would have a in that was something that Alex couldn't counter, she felt like everything was just a bit off, she had been feeling off since the day before, it was like something change but she couldn't put her finger on it. She ran her hand through her hair, and looked at Kara, she didn't want to fight and she knew that this conversation would end there. Her heart was beating faster because of the adrenalin and her muscles felt tense. She looked at Kara, the crinkle on her face and a small frown on her own face she took a deep breath.

“She has had a second and a third chance, I don’t have another one in me for her, I know how you feel and I just want you to be happy, but most of all I want you to be safe, and she has proven that she is not safe, and what about Lex? She wouldn't let us go after her……..”

That uneasy feeling again as she spoke, something connected to Lex this time, what was it about the Luthors that set Alex on edge like this. She needed to get out of this situation, working for a woman she didn't trust, entering into a partnership with another. She focused and finished what she was saying.

“...... She was protected by Lena, and now I am stuck working for her so I can protect you, so that I can make sure that no one is after you”

“Lena was right, Lex didn't have anything to do with it, she even gave her the information. I don't need you to protect me Alex, I love having you watch my back but you can do that with Lena’s help, Nia is on board, you're still meeting her tomorrow right? Alex you promised, and I think that if you leave the DEO you can have it ready quicker, if you really want to help me, help me get out of the DEO too.”

Kara didn't like seeing Alex so unhappy and definitely didn't like that she was still working at the DEO when it was clearly something she hated now. She longed for the simplicity of last year, where Alex was happy, Lena and her were close, although she was enemy number one, things had gone from bad to worse since Reign, but at least she had Alex and Lena. it was time for things to change, Alex not working for the DEO, taking her life back, Alex wanted love, a family and it kept getting put on the back burner. She still didn't understand what happened with Kelly but she knew that Alex living to protect her was not right. She wanted Alex to have the life that she wanted.

Alex looked at her and nodded, she couldn't deny that Lena helped, and that there was no connection to Lex, much to her disappointment. Maybe if she did leave and concentrate on getting the super friends set up right she could find a new calling, something that would mean that she could move forward, she was unsettled. Dwelling on the past was not something that Alex needed to do, Maggie, was a unhealthy relationship, the DEO was a unhealthy work environment, she needed to change this, she needed to get her out of the DEO, she didn't trust Lex, she didn't trust the government and she didn't want Kara at risk.

“Yes Kara, I am still meeting with her, and well maybe you're right I need to get out of the DEO once and for all, I shouldn't have gone back. It was a mistake. I need you to promise that you will be careful Kara, don’t just let her all the way in ok. Just remember if she is walking on the edge she can fall either side, and you are the one that will get hurt when she falls, I just want you to be safe.”

Kara’s head snapped around and she looked to the window, Alex looked up and nodded, she knew that Kara had to go, the conversation wasn't finished, but it was paused for now, like many conversations lately, they would need to take a rain check. Kara hugged her and flew through the window, leaving Alex with her thoughts. That would definitely change the conversation with Lena, after all now there was more than just working with her, Kara and her were back in contact and that meant a sister talk too. She was not having Kara pulled all the way into this again without warning the woman what would happen if she even thought about hurting Kara again. She had to go into work, maybe she should wait to see how tomorrow went with Lena before quitting, after all there was no guarantee that after their little talk Alex would be on the team. The image of Kara in that cage the glowing kryptonite all around her, the veins on her face shining under the toxic crystal. She never wanted to see that again, Lena may have made a suit to stop it but she wasn't off the hook, not with Alex now by a long shot.

Noonan's (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 08:00………

Alex had cleaned up the flat and then headed out to the DEO, she decided to stop at Noonan's for Coffee, not that she needed any she was already feeling quite the buzz from the adrenalin, she was not sure about what was happening between Kara and Lena but she didn't like it any more than she liked working for Lex. she walked into the coffee shop and waited in the line, she was in a world of her own, planning out what she was going to say and do when she met with Lena when a familiar laugh cut through the fog of her mind, that was Maggie's laugh, she looked through the shop for the familiar smile, the woman that she had been in love with, the one that changed everything, she couldn't see through the crowd; Alex needed to get a grip, not only was she dwelling on thoughts she was now hallucinating the melodic laugh of her. She needed to work out whatever kink that was in her mind and get things back on track. The woman at the front of the line laughed again and then made her way out, Alex looked up and saw the retreating form, damn it now she was seeing Maggie. She needed to punch something, training today would be hell for the new recruits.

DEO (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 08:15………

At the DEO she started the training session, fifteen new recruits, all of them were going to get a workout today. She started with some drills, and then moved on to the sparring, she took on one after another, each recruit trying to defeat the seasoned agent, each one was dispatched in brutal fashion, the training they had received so far no match for Alex in this mood. Alex wasn't getting the kind of challenge she needed and dismissed them for Lunch. Alex hitting the gym, she needed something to keep her mind of the fact that Lena and Kara were about to meet, and that was something else for her to worry about. She felt like she was a raw nerve at the moment, that her mind was trying to catch up with whatever was going on, she continued to punch the bag harder and harder just trying to get some of her energy out.

She had a small lunch after working out at the gym, then looked at the next task, it was time to train with the older recruits, she liked this, these were seasoned agents, much more able to give her the challenge she needed, she had found lunch was less than fun, her thoughts drifting to what happened with Kara and Lena, drifting to Maggie, or the woman that she thought was her, she had taken a moment to check out Maggie online there was nothing about her moving. She thought about using the database to find out if Maggie was still working in Gotham, but that would be a misuse of the system and she would probably end up in Lex’s office. She didn't care if she had to see Lex anyway, she checked and Maggie had left her position in Gotham, and was being reinstated in National city, it was Maggie she saw. She thought about heading out and tracking her down; No, she decided to just go to the training room and begin.

The agents were ready; there was an air of nervousness in the room, a palpable energy adding to Alex’s own abundance. She started with some basic sparing and soon began to get carried away with the fight. Some of the agents got in a good punch or kick, but Alex had beaten them all one by one, it still wasn't enough.

“Again”

The agents started again, two at a time but there was still not defeating Alex in this mood, soon the Agents even the toughest were reticent at taking another round against Alex, all hanging back and looking amongst themselves, nurturing bruises, cracked ribs, bloodied lips and noses. Alex had not been like this in a very long time, and they were starting to worry about their commander. Vasquez dismissed everyone, whatever happened next there was no need to have an audience.


	6. Oblivious lovers

Lena Luthor's office (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 12:50………

“Miss Luthor, you asked me to, remind you about your Lunch appointment, oh and the special treat that you asked for has arrived”

Lena had been caught up in work, nothing unusual there, although she had spent almost as much time caught up in thoughts of Kara. She knew that today would be a pinnacle point in their relationship, she was nervous and that didn't help she just wanted to have things go back to normal, well what passes for normal, when you are totally and irrevocably in love with your best friend; who you had tortured because she betrayed you, but you couldn't stop loving her. On top of that there was the friendship, the only true friendship she had ever had one so important to her that she wouldn't even admit her feelings to her in case she lost her entirely. What happened was worse, but she wanted to get past it, to get back the friendship at least, she looked up to see Jess as she stepped in and spoke.

“Thank you Jess, that's great, thank you for getting that for me, I will head out now for Lunch. I will be back in an hour or so. Only transfer calls that are urgent otherwise I am taking a lunch break.”

Jess smiled at her and she was more than happy to see Lena having a break of any kind, and the request for the dessert suggested Kara would be there, that and the change in access from the morning. She didn't know exactly what happened but it had been bad, Lena had changed so much and Jess was worried, the loss of Kara seemed to have such an effect on her boss. She didn't want to see Lena hurt again but at the same time, she wasn't happy without the sunny blond. She placed the containers on Lenas Desk and smiled as she moved away. Leaving Lena to gather her things. Lena smiled, Jess was a treasure and she was so glad that she was there. She gathered up the containers and rushed out to the Park to meet Kara.

Park (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 13:00………

Lena wandered around the park looking for Kara, she wondered where exactly they would be meeting because she knew enough about Kara to know that she would find her. She was nervous and wondered how it would go, would it be awkward, would there be more crying and shouting? She really wasn't sure, she didn't want that to be the case. This was the chance she needed to have Kara back and she smiled softly to herself, something that often happened when she thought of Kara. Hovering above the park listening to Lena making her way, her heart was racing a little, Kara could hear the excitement and nerves playing out in the beating of her heart, she closed her eyes for a moment and listened. Landing just around the corner and changing she moved to where Lena was her nervousness coming out in her uncontrolled movements. Her hands twisting and her eyes skirting around, she approached the woman of the hour.

“Lena, hi, it’s nice to see you”

“Kara, Hello, it's nice to see you, I hope that you were not waiting to long, you know how work can be”

The smile on her face erupted into a wide and welcoming gesture Lena moving closer to Kara and opening her arms to offer a hug. She was not sure that she should have, but that was the natural response to seeing Kara, as much as she knew this wasn't their normal meeting she couldn't stop her arms reaching for her.Kara saw the smile begin and spread across her face and heard the heart rate increase. It was not quite the smile she used to get; but it was a start and the heart responding was encouraging.

She moved closer to her fiddling with her hands as she did, she watched and Lena opened her arms hugging her; god it felt good to feel her arms around her again. There was comfort, there was warmth, everything in this embrace was familiar and comforting although it ended too soon. She reluctantly let her go as she pulled back, her arms already missing her, her heart beating faster trying to jump out of her chest and go to the luthor. She looked up and then back at Lena with a blush on her cheeks, she wasn’t sure how casual they could be with their talk what would upset her, now she was back all she wanted was to keep her in her life however Lena would allow.

“Oh just hanging out, you know, um, How is work?”

She offered a smile and the burger, motioning to a bench. Lena moved over to the bench, Kara found that she naturally drifted to the bench with Lena, caught in her gravitational wake; Kara naturally felt the pull towards the woman and sat with her. She listened as Lena’s heart steadied and she felt more comfortable, there was a calm feeling that washed over her as the heart slowed and the common place discussion started. Lena felt more comfortable following the embrace and the casual way that Kara was being, she wanted this, she wanted the calm.

“Meeting’s, a few new projects, how about you, what is happening at CATCO?”

She winced lightly at the mention of CATCO, it wasn’t the same. Lena saw the wince and scalded herself, she had sold the company to andrea in part of her revenge scheme but she had not followed through, then there was the change in direction, Lena couldn't even do anything to help now.

“Well I guess, it’s just..... I don’t really like it there anymore, I think that it is to far from Cats vision, I am able to write more of what I like now”

She smiled that she didn’t want Lena to think her current unhappiness at work was her fault. She picked up the burger taking a bite and softly smiling. She wasn't happy in either position in this new world that wasn't Lena’s fault either, it was Lex’s, Kara was sure that Lex would have ended Kara too if she could but it wasn't possible it would seem.

“I hope I can help get it back on track, what’s your new project?”

Lena thought about what was happening, the way the world had been created the male Lex that had done everything to make sure that the world that they were in was miserable for the blonde, it wasn't her Lexi, but if she explained that it wasn't the same Lex then she would have to explain that she was not the same Lena and well would that mean that she wouldn't give her a chance, wouldn't allow them to connect again. She didn't have her Kara exactly but this one and her had been through everything the same, maybe Kara would be able to look past this and accept her, everything had been the same as far as she could see, except the relationship with Lex. Kara had asked a question, she needed to focus on building the bond, not worry about the thought that it could be entirely one sided.

“I am currently working on the difficulties we have in storing solar energy, the energy can be collected and stored but the batteries do not retain the power, there needs to be a better way to do this, that makes it a more sustainable energy source. Just a little something that I have been meaning to work on for a while, so isn't being able to write more of what you want a good thing?”

She listened as she ate, she was finished with her first burger and took out the second, there was no need to hide her appetite now. She finished burger two and wiped her fingers listening to Lena; solar energy she knew a lot about that on many levels. She wanted to do something that would be good, something that would show Lena she trusted her; and of course spend more time with her because she didn’t want to be apart for this long again.

“I could maybe help, if you wanted me to, I um, well I know more than I let on and Um, I guess as long as it’s no harm I could help, Well having more freedom on my articles is good, but if the words I write are not trusted it makes me think it’s pointless, but I hope we can turn it around”

Lena had smiled as she watched her eating, Lena knew that Kara ate a lot but she didn't seem to be hiding it any longer, the offer of help was amazing too, she knew that Kara would have ideas and knowledge that was kryptonian, they were advanced and Kara was clearly much more intelligent than she had previously let on, Lena would be happy to have her work with her on this, and it meant more time with Kara. She smiled and pulled out the dessert as she saw Lena finish the last of the food.

“I would love to have your input, Kara, that would be great, and I have brought a little something for your sweet tooth.”

Kara could see Lena looking at her and bit her lip, she was feeling comfortable and happy; in the presence of Lena she felt more like herself, more so than for a long time. When she said that she would like to work with her Kara’s heart skipped and the smile spread on her face, unable to contain the happiness of the few words; then dessert too, Kara flung her arms around Lena and hugged her. She blushed lightly at her spontaneous admission and hug, looking instead at the offering.

“Mmmmm this is why your my favourite Lena, your company and cheese cake, Mmmm looks good”

The second spontaneous hug warmed Lena’s heart, the beat increased and she felt a budding radiating glow coming from her. She knew that Kara could hear it and she blushed lightly, she would always be betrayed by her heart, she just hoped that Kara would pick up nerves over the love she had for Kara. her stomach fluttered, the soft moans from Kara making it somewhat more difficult to keep her thoughts at bay. The overwhelming sensations having Kara back in her presence was just a reminder of how starved she had been recently without the contact with her. She craved it, she wondered if there could ever be more and then banished the thought from her mind.

“From the pastry place downtown, the authentic French pastry chef, almost as good as going to France. So your favorite huh? Don't worry I wont tell the others you said that”

Kara smiled. She loved that place, everything was real, meaning high calories; it meant that she could use that as an excuse for a quick stop there when she was busy. Kara took a bite and the cream and strawberry filled her mouth; she let out a soft moan as the sweetness hit her.

“Rao that’s so good”

She focused back on Lena and could see the glint in her eye, the one that used to mean she was being playful, she wasn’t disappointed, although there was a small sting as she really was her favourite; someone she loved very deeply, and the teasing suggested Lena was making fun, she didn’t know though it wasn’t her fault.

“Nothing they don’t already know, I’m sure if you hack into the DEO. Winn’s files will still be there, he used to make gifs and videos of my rants”

She smiled and shrugged there were many where she was telling someone off because they said something about Lena. She chuckled and popped the last of the cheese cake in her mouth enjoying the taste.

“When would you like my help?”

She spoke through a mouthful of food covering her mouth and blushing, Lena knew she ate a lot now but there was another thing being a pig. No wonder the sophisticated Lena Luthor wouldn’t be interested in her; she was still learning to chew with her mouth closed.

Lena had caught the small shift in Kara as she was speaking, if she had not been staring into those azure orbs she wouldn't have seen it, her normal playfulness the deflection of her own feelings, the way her heart had jumped. Kara had said she was her favorite, that was something that she never thought she would hear again, it may not mean all that she wanted but it was enough to sustain her. She hoped that it had not upset her, after all that was the opposite of what she wanted. All the people in her life that Kara loved and Lena was her favorite, it meant more to her than the words themselves, it meant everything. The sun glinting in her eyes made it almost impossible to look away, so she just calmed and continued to gaze.

“Well I have a few things that need to be completed and some projects to finish, with a few later evenings I could have it all finished by friday, if you're free to come by on friday we would work on it then.”

Kara watched as Lena studied her face, stared into her eyes, was she looking for more deception? Kara didn’t look away; she wanted her to see that she meant every word. Kara didn’t like the nagging feeling that Lena was waiting for her to lie, to catch her out; she did this, she broke it, she needed to fix it. Lena may never want her the way she wanted her too, but to be wanted for any reason would be enough, she would do her best to be there for Lena and show her their friendship wasn’t based on a lie. She smiled softly when Lena spoke, Friday that was days away, she had hoped that she would see her sooner but twice in a week was still more than she had in the past couple months.

“Friday sounds great, you can show me what your working on and then maybe we can look at a bio storage system, something crossed between plant and kryptonian cells, I think that would give you a better range of power storage”

She tilted her head slightly and bit her lip. The next suggestion could cause an issue but she hoped that it would show faith, show trust, show Lena that there were no more lies, nothing that they couldn't discuss, nothing that they needed to avoid. It was a big ask, she knew that Lena had taken a trip towards the dark and that Kryptonite had been her weapon but this could be a good thing, a chance to move forward.

“Can you make a small amount of kryptonite and fashion it into a cannula I would rather not blow my powers”

Lena listened to Kara, she seemed to light up talking about the possibilities, this was a new and exciting side to Kara that she hadn't seen and her theory was brilliant, plants naturally absorbed the sun for power and Kara stored the radiation to power her abilities, the combination of the two cells could make a very powerful storage device. Then came the question, Kara had paused before it and there it was, Kryptonite hanging over them like a shadow. Karas face in the cage hurt the pain, she couldn't see that again, she didn't want to go there again, it hurt her too much. Alex didn't trust her at all and making kryptonite wouldn't help with that at all. Lena felt her heart rate pick up and started fiddling with her hands picking at her fingers, she wasn't sure that this was a good idea, why would she want her too? For a blood sample?

“Kara I don't think that is a good idea? I promised never to make it again, I promised you, do you really think that this is a good idea?”

Kara smiled at the way Lena lit up at the suggestion, she really wanted to help her and then she could help people see the good in her again. She wanted everyone to forget the past, the new timeline; Lena had saved her; she wanted to give her a chance to continue. When Lena’s demeanour changed Kara’s brow furrowed and she looked at her. Something was troubling the brunette and she wondered if it was because of her suggestion. When Lena spoke about the kryptonite she realised her mistake, Lena still felt bad about it.

“Lena we talked about this, I reacted badly, I don’t want there to be kryptonite everywhere but if I ask the DEO they will take over, if you don’t feel comfortable then I will find another way but my blood will help us”

The last thing that she wanted was to upset her, if Lena didn’t think that it was a good idea maybe she should find another way she wanted there to be a new start and this; this would be a show of trust. Maybe she could get a sample from the DEO without anyone knowing there were still a few she was sure of it.

Lena wasn't sure that this was a good plan, but Kara was giving her a lot of trust, not just to make kryptonite but to use it on her, this moment how she handled it this would define how they went on, it wasn't just that Kara needed to trust her, she needed to trust herself too. If Kara thought that this was a good idea, she would try to make the kryptonite and prove she could use it for a good reason, she would also make sure that there was no way it could hurt Kara. her heart started to slow as she calmed down, thinking more clearly, she would be more than happy to have more time with Kara too.

“If you think that this is the best option, then I will make it, and we can draw the blood but then I will destroy it, I don't want even a small amount of Kryptonite anywhere near you. I don't want to hurt you again Kara.”

Kara smiled softly looking at Lena. She seemed to calm and relax; after all it was Kara that was asking about her making it. She was glad when she agreed to her plan. Her heart swelled at the statement, she didn't want to run the risk of hurting her, she smiled softly wanting to put her at ease.

“Well there will be some discomfort but it should be fine, as long as you have a lead box to put it in when done I should be fine”

Lena smiled slightly at that, even the smallest discomfort was too much, but if it was going to help then she would do it. She squeezed her hand softly and bit her lip as she spoke.

“I am so glad that you agreed to Lunch. I had a great time, Kara.”

When she smiled it was not the smile she was used to, it was less bright somehow, Kara was listening and watching everything, her heart rate temperature micro gestures. There was something right now she was feeling uncomfortable. The squeeze to the hand drew the kryptonian back out from her thoughts. Her lips curled into a smile as her eyes softened gazing at Lena. 

“I wouldn’t have missed this for the world Lena, I have found being away for this past two weeks hard, I know that we needed the time but, not everything we need is comfortable and nice”

She squeezed back and just allowed their hands to rest together, thinking to herself that it would be nice to hold her hand.

“Will you have enough time before Friday to make it?”

Lena’s heart rate increased again as their hands rested together, she could feel the warmth the way her whole body seemed to vibrate from the touch, she thought it would be easy to get completely lost in this feeling, to be lost in the love for Kara she was more than happy in this moment hands touching, looking into her eyes. She wanted to stay in this moment as long as she could. She wanted to lean forward to capture the beautiful lips of the blond, she needed to think of something else and looked away for a moment.

“Well I think that I can juggle a few things, and if I work on it in the evenings then I should be able to get it done by Friday, the process isn't hard but it takes time to crystallize.”

Kara listened, making a mental note to take food to the lab. She wouldn’t push Lena. She wanted to spend time with her; she loved it when they talked and just allowed themselves to enjoy each other’s company. She wanted nothing more most days than to talk to her in some fashion but Lena had been clear. She sighed softly as she thought about this; Lena would never want her the way she wanted her; the excitement at a text, the anticipation of the next conversation, the next meeting, hug. She shook off her thoughts Lena was clear she would do this how she wanted.

“Oh, well I don’t want you to be over working, I could help? Or bring food I will leave at reception if you want me too?”

Kara cursed herself she knew in her mind she needed to be stronger with herself and Lena, showing her that she was more than a bumbling fool, that she was stronger, but she missed everything about her when they were apart.

Lena tilted her head and looked at her, the way she spoke there was an almost desperate edge to her voice, or was it Lena’s own desperate desire to have more time with Kara that she was hearing reflected. She bit her lip if Kara wanted more time with her then she wouldn’t complain, even if she just dropped in to bring food. She would be more than happy for a brief coffee, she missed everything so much. It wouldn't be the first time she had missed something, after all there was all the time she didnt notice that Kara was Supergirl, she decided that she would go with her first instinct. Kara wanted more time with her too, just as Lena wanted more time. Lenas attention was called by the beep from her purse.

The beep signifies the end of their time and as Lena started to prepare to leave, Kara's expression grew sad. It was not enough; not after so long apart but there was nothing she could do putting a smile on her face. She gathered the items and looked at Lena, the emerald orbs that attracted her so much; bright searing into her they stole her breath.

“I have to go, but you're more than welcome to come by if you want to Kara, if the City is quiet and you're not needed anywhere else. Your access is restored fully and you can come and go as you please. If you helped me in the evenings when you are free we could definitely get things moving quicker.”

Kara loves that smile, it was bright and real and it was all for her; she had thought she would never see it again not so long ago but it was here and her heart jumped for joy. She was so excited by the prospect of more time being granted she could have floated, she could fly but that was determination not just through happiness.

“Well that would be great, I can come over after patrol with dinner and help you work on things I mean I can assist with whatever.. um, like I won’t be in the way; You.. you have given me access again?”

Kara could hardly believe it. She was smiling and looking at Lena she pulled her in for a hug holding her just a little closer than normal, a little tighter but not to hurt. Lena found herself enveloped in the kryptonians arms, she was closer, held tighter, her mind started to quieten, she was getting lost in the moment, in Kara, the whole of her body was melting into the contact the feeling of being held so close to Kara, she swallowed thickly her throat dry, she needed to maintain composure, her love for Kara needed to remain a secret, Kara would never love her back but in this moment it felt a lot like love.

“I have to go to Kara, but it would be great if you have time later to have your help.”

“I should let you go I, will get to work and I will see you later if nothing happens”

Lena’s eyes automatically closed as the rest of her senses sharpened, becoming attuned to everything about their hug. It was probably only two to three seconds, but in that short time. The CEO fell into the warmth Kara’s body offered. She breathed in the sweet radiant scent of the Kryptonian. And if Lena didn’t know any better, she would swear on her life that she could sense the blonde’s heart beat.

“I’ll see you tonight then,” she said as she pulled back.

She smiled, loosening her grip and letting her go, she couldn't help the way that her lips pulled further as she backed off; stepping away from the perfect moment, knowing that she would see her later. Turning from her she felt her goofy grin spread and it took everything to stay on the ground. She walked away heading to CATCO, waiting until she was far enough out of sight to look back on Lena. She could hear her heart racing, she had the happy bounce to the rhythm, Kara loved that, loved it was her that caused the happiness.

With another smile, Lena began to walk in the opposite direction of Kara, and couldn’t help but look back to glance at her retreating form. As though a truckload of bricks had fallen onto her chest, one phrase immediately drowned out everything else into near silence: 

The one concrete thought “I love her…”


	7. Poetic justice

Lex’s secret Lab (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 15:00………

The alarm went off and Lex sighed, she was making progress and didn't want to leave but she had to go to the DEO, she had made so much progress, the three new forms of Kryptonite were created and in containment, that made all 118 based on the periodic table and then she needed to create some of the missing elements. She wondered if finding the elements would be easier than trying to create them, but that was a project all of its own, and she was focused on the kryptonite, after all there were so many things that she could do with it. She hadn't spoken to Lena about it yet but she was sure that some of the applications would interest her. She wasn't sure that she would be on board what with the kryptonian she was so fascinated by. She wondered what the older Danvers would be thinking in connection with them talking again, Lex wasn't thrilled at the prospect but Lena loved her and Lex knew that, she wondered what would be the outcome of lunch. It would be over now, and there was every chance that Lena would be Either ecstatic or devastated. She didn't have time to dwell on this thought either. Lena knew where she was if she needed her, they had breakfast this morning, sunday would be another chance to have breakfast.

Lex packed up her things and put away the samples hiding them within containment before activating the grid and moving across the lab to the exit. She closed and locked up ensuring that everything was secure before taking the elevator to the garage and sliding into the town car. The drive was uneventful and shorter than she would have liked, she didn't want to go to the DEO but she needed to get there. 

There would be countless things to sign, initiatives to authorize. At least she wasn't on the action end of the equation, the previous people running the governments extermination squad were always in the thick of it, Lex could say one thing for her male counterpart, he knew how to delegate, he was in charge and had all the power without dirtying his hands at all. If she was at all interested in the inner workings of the government agency she would have been quite happy with the world that he created, however it would not have been her choice. She felt the car slow and took a breath, this place was a variable minefield for her, constant talk of aliens, and what they could do, the super working there, the connection with superman, this was not a safe place for her to be.

DEO (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 16:30………

Alex looked at Vasquez; she wasn't sure what she was doing, but Alex was not in the mood. At least when she was hitting things she was feeling more herself, this feeling of being off balance was not something that she was enjoying at all. She thought about having the team look into disturbances from the other day, there seemed to be some kind of shift and she was not quite right.

“What's the meaning of this Vasquez we still had a hour of training to do”

Vasquez looked at Alex, she was not right whatever this was, it was something big. She couldn't remember the last time she saw her so curbed up inside. Alex had been off since she came back, but in the last couple of days things seemed worse. Kara was fine if the reports were to be believed, out being super, she knew Alex had split with Kelly but heartbreak and Alex was more of a drinking thing not a beat agent into a bloody pulp thing. She was next in the firing line if she didn't play this a little smart. Alex did not respond to smart.

“The meaning of this is keeping alpha team in one piece so they can do their job’s, and finding out what the hell is wrong with you, you have been off for a few days and this, well this is extreme even for you”

Alex noted that Vasquez noticed there was an obvious difference in her over the past few days, she wasn't going crazy. There was something up with her, and she was sure that it wasn't just her being unhappy with her current life. She looked at the shorter woman and ran her hand through her hair, she may need some help, she definitely needed to be away from the DEO.

“A couple days ago there seemed to be some kind of shift and I don't know what caused it, Kara is meeting with Lena, which is bad enough. Maggie is back in national city, I have to deal with Lena tomorrow and I feel like the world tilted and I am struggling to catch up”

Lex walked into what should have been a training session and saw just two agents there, Alex and a shorter woman, she moved closer she was supposed to check in on the training not that it appeared to be happening. That's when she heard it, Alex was going to deal with Lena, what did she mean by that? There was no way that after all she went through she was going to have this woman threatening her sister.

“My office Agent Danvers, Now”

Alex rolled her eyes and followed Lex to her office, something about this felt so very far off. She followed, into the office and stood watching Lex, at least she could quit now, that was on the plus side whatever she had to say could be the preamble to her resignation. Lex had turned to look at the red head, she was not sure the best way to deal with her, she had little interactions with her. Every time that she saw the woman she seemed to be moaning about something, the way that things changed that the DEO wasn't what it was, that the city was in need of a new regime she clearly was not a fan of this world. Lena being threatened was already making her feel a little off.

“Always complaining Agent Danvers, tell me what exactly are you planning to do to my darling sister?”

Alex was a little surprised by the question, Lex may currently be her boss but she wasn't someone that she talked to, not someone that she was interested in sharing thoughts with. Lex seemed to be concerned about Lena, was there something about their relationship that was actually like a functioning sibling relationship? She had the stance of a protective older sister and Alex couldn't help but wonder if there was some part of her that actually did care, although that was a human emotion and Lex was anything but that.

“Well I thought I would start with some threats, then maybe some information about what will happen to her if she hurts my sister, you know the normal routine when your sister makes the decision to see their evil best friend”

“So nothing new or original, well that’s about what I expect…... After all, you're more inclined to punch first and ask questions later. Now tell me Danvers do you understand the word hypocrisy? How does someone expect something different from others than they do themselves? Was it not your sister who went off at Mon-El for lying, that even though he tried to tell her, over and over again, that she didn’t care, that she was done with him? She would never forgive him? Was this not the same line she fed Lena after lying to her for years?”

That hit Alex it wasn't fair to compare the two, Kara had lied to protect her, not to hide her truth, Mon-El was the prince of Daxam and had lied about it, he had said that he escaped due to finding a pod, where the kryptonian had been killed to take the pod for Monel. Everything that Mon-El had done was malicious and designed to manipulate Kara. It made her angry that Lex had suggested that Kara was anything like that man child. The other thing was Kara and her were different people, Kara forgave her already Alex knew that, but she would never, she could never forget or forgive what she had done.

“Kara is her own person, not that your approval of her matters but Kara lied to protect Lena not that she cares, or even took that into consideration, which is unthinkable for someone who said that she loved Kara, that they were best friends. If that wasn't bad enough she went out of her way to lock her in a kryptonite cage for twenty four hours. Stole from her a piece of tech to take over the world, and left her there in agony. My sister is a better human than I am, she had forgiven Lena; for her weakness, for her actions and for everything she has done, I am not so easily swayed, I will never forgive her for what she did.”

Lex listened to Alex speaking, she was not sure that was something that she knew about, she wondered when that happened. It suggested that there was a lot more feeling present than Lex had thought, although she did suspect that there was an infatuation, a crush maybe even the start of love, although Lena had not confirmed it, Alex had. She could see the emotion on the face of the older Danvers girl. She wasn't sure what it was: frustration, hate, anger, annoyance, it was something in the classically negative column.

“A kryptonite cage, well the blonde must have got in deep. It's surprising really that she let anyone in at all, let alone that deep. I thought that mother would have taught her like me, that we should not trust anyone? Guess having no understanding of the emotions she wanted us to suppress, was a bonus after all, they seem to have caused Lena no end of difficulties”

Alex listened to her; like the thought of letting someone in was a good enough reason to cause pain, pain which Lena shouldn’t have felt because she should have suppressed the emotions. Like this makes sense like this explains everything, Lenas inability to suppress how she felt for Kara gave her the right to inflict pain. Alex couldn't fathom what kind of twisted house they grew up in but that was not a good enough reason for anyone to do that to someone as sweet and loving as Kara.

“Well if only Lillian had done her job better, considering the level of destruction that Lena embarked upon based on a little hurt, the pain of someone lying to protect her was enough for her to go positively nuclear.”

Lex smiled a sardonic smile and moved a little away standing by the window. Alex had little or no understanding of what Lena had gone through, or she simply didn’t care; Lex decided that to educate the older Danvers girl was warranted at this point, her self-righteousness was bordering on blinding, she couldn’t see any wrong with the blonde.

“Oh Alex, how emotional and judgmental you are, I had hope for better from a scientist. I know little of emotions and love but I know Lena love’s Kara, how do I know? One, I am Lex Luthor. She has all of my inventions and her own, a multitude of which could easily kill the kryptonian. Two she chose green kryptonite, not gold to completely strip her power, or to control her with the Q wave. Three she used a cage nothing that would penetrate the skin or allow the kryptonite to kill” 

Lex turned and looked at Alex, her brow raised and her arms crossed over her chest, she looked at the agent emotion still playing across her face. She wasn’t finished yet though, there was still more that the red head needed to understand.

“The pain she suffered over three years translates into twenty four hours as a taster, probably with your knowledge of where they were and a failsafe to stop it. Lena the girl no one wanted, everyone used was lied to for years by the one person she loved, but that’s not all, you all lied and made excuses, you all used her money, power, connections and intelligence to save her and yourselves, you gave her hope she could be loved while you all used her, lied to her, made her look a fool, all of you, she took revenge on one for twenty four hours, If mother had been more successful things would have been different, mother would have slaughtered you all, I have seen her do it” 

Lex smiled she was nearly done with her monologue; how she missed giving them. There was something satisfying about being able to lay things out, things that are obvious to see but people don't want to look at, the psychological connections, the causal effects of things people do without any care.

“You see everyone knew, even me and mother, she spent billions on Kara and supergirl, gave her time and effort, for what? for hope, that’s what she is hope, the paragon of it no less and there is nothing more dangerous in the world”

Alex listened to Lex, she wasn't sure why she was entertaining this conversation but the way that she was talking was impassioned, not something that she expected to hear from Lex Luthor. One thing was clear to her; Lex in her own way loved Lena, it was much like the way she loved her own sister. She couldn't fathom that the monstrous murderer that stood before her loved anyone. However it was clear that she did. The monster that brought them up clearly had twisted them though if Lex thought that what Lena did was in any way defensible. She couldn't deny the hurt that she had seen in Lena, the love and passion and the good things that she had done, something that she had somehow forgotten in her anger. Lena had done amazing things to help them all, to save them all she had seen a lot of good in her. Kara deserved better, if that was what being loved by the younger Luthor looked like, all that good and one mistake she became unstable and hurt her. Kara deserved better, she was a good person. The world Kara even may think that the slate was even but Alex just couldn't see the balance.

“Kara never intended to hurt Lena, she never wanted to do anything but to help her to be her friend. She saved her life, risked her own on more than one occasion to save her, ironically more often than not from her own family, and what is the thanks that she got?”

Alex clenched her jaw, and tried to keep a modicum of calm before she continued.

“She was tortured, manipulated, encouraged to break the law, steal. Hope doesn't hurt people, hope gives people something to believe in, hope, love and Kara don't hurt with intention, Kara only intended to keep her safe. She offered her support, she offered her friendship, she believed in her more than she deserved, no matter how much money, how much time Lena spent helping it will never outweigh what she did, Kara embodies hope and Lena caged her, she will never be good enough for Kara”

Lex watched the emotions play over the face of the older Danvers woman. Some she recognised others she didn’t. How could she be so brilliant and find things so easy but not understand the most basic human emotions. Unlike the others on the spectrum who didn’t know there was something wrong she did. If she understood better she could maybe change this woman’s opinion of her fragile sister. However the beauty of Lena’s revenge caught her attention and her need for understanding was gone.

“How utterly beautiful in its simplicity and symbolic nature her revenge” 

Lex smiled and looked at Alex wondering if she could see it? There was nothing but more emotion. The woman had multiple degrees she was able to formulate and execute intricate planning, design and make weapons tech and all manner of things that can help with any given alien threat yet she couldn't see the simplest of causal relations.

“Lena compartmentalized her memories and emotions all her life, she didn’t have hope, Kara gave her that and when it was gone, she locked it in a box, like the ones in her mind Lena has literally caged the icon of her hope in her pain, she externalized.”

Alex’s mouth gaped a little as she listened, the depth of the analysis the way that she had constructed the logic behind it, the psychology, it was amazing, if she had seen that somewhere else, the poetic nature of the revenge it may have been something to spend a moment on but Alex could only see how Lena had used her remarkable intelligence to create a beautiful revenge. She couldn't have forgiven Mon-El for his behavior, she had tolerated him for Kara; god if he physically hurt her she would have filled him full of lead; she wasn't about to make the exception for Lena. Kara had loved her, defended her, saved her, all manner of doubts and proof disassembled by her sister and Lena had done that, not once did she step back and change her actions.

“It may have been poetic but it was still evil and not an act of someone who loves the other person. She could have stopped it, she could have avoided everything, but she forged forward even when Kara continued to try she manipulated her. Kara did everything that Lena asked to prove herself, she did everything that she could, and Lena just saw it as weakness to be used against her, she used Kara’s love against her. She overlooked the things Kara did for her, the way she defended her, loved her, she continued with her plan not caring that Kara continued to demonstrate love and affection. She uses her, that isn't love, but tell me Lex, what does the thoughts of a hypocritical emotional scientist matter, why are you trying to change my perspective. Lena is protected by Kara, she is off limits as long as that stands”

Lex watched as Alex began to talk, she quirked her brow and tilted her head, not normally interested in the interactions between people Alex has sparked her interest now. She was emotional and entering into a debate with a superior mind with gusto and Lex couldn’t help but admire that. However emotion verses intelligence make for poor competition. The final statement was the one that had Lex worried.

“More emotion Alex, but that is the point we are discussing, the antiquated and outdated methods our brains have yet to devolve from, you see it’s simple, the mood that Lena was in limited her rational brain as much as yours is limited by yours”

Lex wasn’t planning on insulting her, and didn’t mean it in that manner she turned from her for a moment trying to gather a way to explain without causing more emotional turmoil in the agent.

“What I mean is that it is a simple neuropsychological stimulus. The mood that Lena was put into, the pain she felt made it more difficult to look back on any memory that didn’t coincide with that mood. When happy, happy memories are easy to retrieve when unhappy they are not, the memories accessing Lena would have been pain, her mother, my mother our father, every person that has hurt and deceived her, every time Kara and the rest of you lied. “You see the boxes she holds in her mind were triggered by the pain, unleashing a lifetime of it every slap, every abuse, everything that hurt her, with the life my sister led you are lucky she didn’t actually go nuclear”

Taking a step forward Lex looked into Alex’s eyes, her lips curling into a small smile, she needed the woman to understand, she needed to be able to work out just how much of a threat she was, in a fight Lena would be vastly out matched. She needed to know that Lena was safe, that she was under no threat from the older Danvers sister.

“The interest in your opinion Alex; well it is based on protecting Lena from more harm, as an older sister I am sure you understand”

Alex was curious, Lex could have said all that in much more technical terms, although it was still not at its base level of theoretical science it was less intellectualized than she knew Lex could be. She didn't take offence to the slight, it hadn't been intended that way, quite matter of fact, a statement, Lex was a genius. 

Alex wasn't sure why it hadn't bothered her, she was already in quite the bad mood, that had not triggered her into a rage. Wanting to protect a sibling however she did understand. Not that she thought for a moment that Lex wanted to protect her, although the love seemed evident. Alex spotted a tumbler and some glasses, she had not expected to be talking to Lex, kicking her sorry ass maybe, quitting the position definitely. Talking, conversing, actually staying to talk to her, this was not going to continue sober. She brushed past her and poured herself a glass of what was probably very expensive scotch. She downed two fingers and enjoyed the burn as she turned and looked Lex in the eye.

“Well let me make this simple for you Lex. I am in a bad mood, so I am thinking of all the things that your sister did to hurt mine……...You know that she has my sister in her corner, who does a far better job of protecting her than you; after all she has had to protect her from you, your manipulations, your assassination attempts, you are more of a threat to her than I am, so why do you suddenly feel you need to protect her now? ……….. I don't know, I mean it's laughable to a degree to think of you as the protective older sister. I don't want your sister anywhere near my sister, that is protective; if I had my way Lena would never get near Kara but she has Kara. As long as Kara is in her corner, your sister is untouchable, not even I can take on a Kryptonian, she is protected from me and from anyone else that means her harm.”

Alex poured another two fingers and downed them as she looked at Lex, hopefully that would be enough to finish the conversation but just in case she fixed Lex with her eyes and added.

“Also, I am resigning from the DEO”


	8. Not so different after all.

DEO (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 17:30………

Lex had been managing well, it had been a while since her last treatment and this was not a conversation that would help her. Up until the moment Alex mentioned the other Lex’s activities she was holding it together there was nothing that caused too much difficulties. She had not hurt her, couldn't have been locked inside her own body, but he had tried to hurt Lena, he had manipulated her, degraded her and that was something that she would never have done. The only thing in her whole existence that made sense was Lena, she was Lex’s stability Lex’s person and she wouldn't have hurt her. Lillian had done these things in their verse, something that Lex had found out when she had spoken to her mom after being freed from her own body. She said that it was necessary to keep the needed aspects of the timeline that Lena was never in any danger. It was what brought her in contact with Kara, the thing that meant that she was taken from Lex. her body was tense and her heart was beating too fast, the thoughts of what had happened swirling in her mind, pulling at the edges of her stability trying to cause her to break, to unravel. She took a breath and looked at the Danvers woman, she had a small smirk on her face like she knew that she had got to her. Lex listened focused on the words it would appear that Alex did have some understanding of the issue after all, and was aware that her own anger was clouding her judgment and influencing her.

“Why would I be interested in that? You are one of the people who have taken all my inventions and made them evil, locked me into project 7734 and refused my liberation, allowed excessive use of ECT and blockers to get me to do what you want”

Lex had some respect for Alex, her support of her sister, her ability to meet a challenge and not back down. Her ability to temper her speech was waning and she knew it, her filter not great at the best of times was losing its tenuous hold on her mouth, lext often spoke matter of factly, in regards to her own thoughts but there was some ability to hide things. It seemed to be failing her, she couldn't stop.

“I was brought to this earth by mother; I have no interest in the DEO, or having my suits and ai manipulated, I prisoner by Lane for years working on his robot to defeat your sister, he wanted j’onn so I could make it shift, one less government person to twist my thoughts, trigger my mood and control me, the better it is for me. The fact is the Lexi suit was for industry the ai for triage they made me combine them and it almost killed superman, the red sun was to help reduce his power incase he became a threat ordered by the government mandated by the board”

She moved to the counter and poured herself a drink, the slight burning sensation a comfort, and the delay enough for her to try and collect herself. Lex started running through numbers in her head she couldn’t break now not with Alex here, she couldn’t show weakness.

“Your DEO bosses created evil from the innocent. I have no intentions nor political stand, I just like to create. I am not of this verse Alex but I know the truth, your not willing to see, the DEO is the one after her not me or Lena”

Alex had listened, the moment that Lex had said that she was brought to this earth by Lillian the strange feeling that had been with her for the past few days seemed to lift like a vale, she recognized it as it started to move. The feeling that she had after crisis, where she could remember the differences it was back, someone had messed with the book again and that someone was Lillian, she wasn't sure what the total effects was but as she looked at Lex she could see a vision around her a taller bald man, the original Lex Luthor. She wasn't sure what this meant, Lex was going through things in front of her and she paid attention. This level of information was unprecedented, she could have interrogated her for hours and not gotten this much, but she seemed off kilter somehow. Lex was the difference, Alex could see that there were some differences but the glimpse behind the vale was not enough for her to understand everything. She took another drink trying to wash down what she was hearing, to give her time to make sense of it all. She had been here talking with Lex for some time now, she didn't think that this would happen in any universe if Lex wanted to hurt Kara she could have taken Alex out, that was the quickest way but she was still here drinking scotch.

“So you're not from here, and you have no intention to hurt Lena, or me it would appear, but you hate Kara, are you telling me that given the opportunity that you wouldn't hurt her? That trying to kill her with the tornado was controlled by another that you were controlled by another. Well you appear free to do as you wish now, and you are trying to tell me that you are not trying to hurt her?”

Alex had been here a while with no bloodshed, and what appeared to be a honest conversation, however trust was not something that was easy for Alex especially when the person was a Luthor, she wasn't sure why she even bothered to ask after all Lex was infamous for the long con, the slow manipulation of others, everything was a chess game to him, surly this Lex was no different. Could she trust the word of Lex Luthor male or female?

Lex fought with her thoughts and recounted her numbers over and over. Talking too much about the Kryptonian's always caused her issues. She had another drink she could feel her mind unraveling. She was revealing too much, but it was not in her normal way, preaching about her plans or inventions this was less controlled. She shook her head trying to clear her mind; she needed to get back on track, she pinched the bridge of her nose and rubbed across her eyes, an external symptom of the internal pressure building within her.

“I am not being controlled Alex, I am in full control of my body and mind. Would I kill your sister, as much as I despise her; no, you see Alex, I don’t like her because she took my sister from me. Someone very important to me. I have no interest in hurting Lena just having her in my life again. I have no interest in running the DEO, that is mother, I handle it the same as Luthor Corp, I sign what I am given and carry on in my lab”

She took a deep breath and looked at the red head she was studying. she could see it in her eyes she needed to focus. Lex put her hand to her head. She couldn’t stop the thoughts, she needed to change the subject refocus. She didn't need Alex to believe her to be interested in her in any way, she shouldn't have mentioned her Lab. did the woman think that she was trying to get out of things? Trying to paint over history, that wasn't Lex’s style, she wasn't trying to remove blame as such, just get her to understand that there was no intention to it. Lex had no confidence that she would remain free and able to keep her sister safe.

“I admit to all my creations, I made them; it’s true. Each and every one made without intent, created with curiosity, a thought to make things that would work better than the current systems. I didn’t use them for a purpose, not the way people think, they were corrupted by our government. Connections that shouldn't have been made were weapons that were created for others. Red tornado and metalo are Lanes brain children, I made them for my freedom. Not that I expect you to believe any of it after all you are fixed in your own perceptions. Your opinion of me is biased and of little interest, tell me Alex would you kill my sister if she wasn’t protected by her?”

Alex listened and watched, Lex was definitely struggling with something. Was she in some kind of pain? Was there something wrong with her, maybe the treatments she claimed to have had; had some kind of residual effect on her. She admitted to the things she had done, although they all seemed perverted somehow. She really did love her sister, she really wanted to protect her, this wasn’t a manipulation the raw emotion showed on her face, there was truth here. Alex couldn't believe she had spent this much time talking to Lex, not that she was finding the conversation enlightening to say the least. She found herself drawn into her own mind, Lex loved Lena, she wanted to protect her, she could get on board with this, she understood the need for the drive to protect the family, Lex had said that she wouldn't hurt Kara. She thought to her question about Lena, would Alex hurt her? She couldn't forgive the assault on Kara by the manipulation, but as Lex reminded her she couldn't discount the good that Lena had done and could do, she was planning on creating a base for super friends she was trying. 

Alex had seen the sadness in Lena’s eyes the torment the way she had been treated by her family, although apparently not this Lex, she found a small spark of compassion for the younger Luthor, lurking inside her. Even with that her depths of kindness knew no bounds, she had done so much good. Alex couldn't bring herself to hate Lena, not as a person, could she kill her? Maybe if she really hurt Kara again, but if Kara was gone, not of Lena’s hand no, she wouldn't be able to as much as she may have thought she could. She isn't a cold blooded killer. She was even doubting if she could kill her if she hurt Kara again, the understanding of her mental state, the way she was manipulated and lied to, she realized as angry as she was, Lex was in one way right Lena could have easily killed her but didn't.

“No, I am angry with her, I will never forgive or forget what she did to Kara, but she is more than that, I wouldn't kill her, if Kara walked away from her she would be safe, from me at least.”

Alex had softened her tone. She wasn't sure why she wondered if Lex would believe her, or why she hoped that she would, she couldn't understand why it mattered to her what Lex thought about her statement at the moment but she found it did. 

Lex’s question had the desired effect: she needed time for a change of focus, repeating numbers in her mind helps pull her back from the brink, Lena kept her stable, mother kept her in control to a degree but she was still learning to regulate herself. She knew Alex had killed, she knew Alex didn’t enjoy it and that killing significant people, or harming them affected her, she could see that she was contemplating and struggling with herself. When she finally answered Lex turned more composed than before, her smile was softer than before, Alex had said that Lena was safe.

“I know what you must think of me and my family, none of us are what we appear exactly Alex, although human connections mean little to me, Lena does and I am glad to know that she is safe from you”

Lex thought about the tornado and frowned for a moment. It was one of her creations and it had been designed to kill Kara, Lex was in no way wasteful, she had never intended to kill the Kryptonian's she wanted to know that they were there to help against bigger threats it was more a safety measure, something to ensure that if their choices change, if their inconsistencies started to do more harm there was a way to defend humans from them. Reassurances would likely not be believed but Lex wanted Alex to have the same peace of mind as she just gave her.

“The tornado malfunctioned, because I programmed it too. I didn't want to kill her before she met my sister, as difficult as they are to understand I don't want them dead. I have no desire to kill Kara, no intention to before and I am less inclined to now because it would hurt Lena''

The spontaneous admission from Lex about the red tornado caused Alex to pause for a moment, she thought about the words and the information she had received. Lane created a tornado to kill Kara, Lex built it for him, but sabotaged it so that it wouldn't kill her. That meant that Lex not only didn't try to kill her but actively saved her from Lane. Her memories of the day drifted in, seeing Kara fight and fight as it got stronger and learned more, there was a good chance that the robot would have killed her had it worn her down enough before it went off. She had been terrified that she was going to lose Kara, the same way that Lex appeared to lose Lena. Even as she thought she realized the truth, there was a fear there Lex seemed to need Lena in a different way than with her and Kara but she loved her and worried about losing her. In amongst all that she was reassuring Alex that Kara was safe, that she was in no danger from Lex, why was she telling her this? Was there a con in play, was there something that Lex needed? She couldn't help but think that it was just a genuine conversation that nothing else was in play but she had to ask. She wasn't sure what she was feeling, there was something in her that understood Lex. 

“Is there something that you want from me Lex? All this information free from you, I haven't threatened you or tortured you or even asked for it, yet you have given it freely, what is it that you need from me? Or should I just be grateful and thank you for sparing my sister?”

Lex was feeling better, she was almost in full control, she had told the woman a lot and if she pieced it all together she could have given her too much. Lex had been good at hiding everything, compensating, right up until the crash where everything changed. Her father thought her defective, her mother saw her intellect but insisted the other things stayed hidden, it was a level of vulnerability only Lillian had known about. Alex seemed to trigger instability in her which made her dangerous but she was managing to control herself.

“There is nothing that I want from you Alex, I came to you because I was concerned about Lena, her safety and well-being the statistics, the analysis the simulations everything pointed at one issue”

She turned to look out the window taking the glass and moving to look over the city. There was something unnerving about looking directly at the redhead, she held her scotch in her hand, and drank it, the third or was it the fourth, she was feeling the effects and would need to stop. She may have managed to pull her mind back to focus but under the influence that wouldn't be possible.

“You, you were a statistical anomaly, an inconsistent variable, a wild card if you will, I needed more information and to assess this inconsistent variable myself. You see you have killed before when it would hurt Kara, and refrained when it would, you have advocated for and against Lena, saved her and threatened her, the only constant is the inconsistency, but I believe you when you say you will not hurt her, so you see I have got what I need, there is no need to thank me I did it for Lena”

Lex didn’t want either kryptonian dead, she just couldn’t stand the inconsistency in their choices and wanted to be sure that they were stoppable if needed. Kara was less unpredictable than superman himself, after all Lex knew him better yet still couldn't understand or predict his movements. 

Alex was struck but the level of thought that Lex had put into her, how she was contemplating her and researching her. She was a little flattered and a little confused, the statement was clarity and at the same time somewhat dismissive, she knew what it was like to be dismissed but this didn't seem the same not quite. It was like Lex had compartmentalized the conversation once she had the final piece of the puzzle she needed. What she needed or wanted from Alex was something that was easily given, she was glad that was all that she wanted.

“Well I have been called worse things than that, I am glad that you have what you needed, and Thank you again. I don't know what I would have done without Kara, the world without her seems dark and not a place I want to live, she means a lot to me, so even though you don't want it. I thank you””

She formed a half smile on her face as she looked at the other woman, who would have thought this was how the conversation would have played out. Alex finished the scotch, she didn't want to waste it, and placed the glass on the side.

Lex watched Alex the way her lip curled into what was almost a smile when she spoke, she knew this to be a humorous deflection, a way to show that you were offended but not enough to be hurt. Tilting her head to the side slightly as she listened to her talk about Kara. The way that her world seemed to hinge on her sister as Lex’s did she couldn’t help but offer a small smile of her own. For the second time she found that Alex had impressed her, she cared for her sister to a degree that lex cared for Lena. She was taken back by the admission and spontaneous divulgence of what would be considered a weakness by her family.

“Well then I am glad that you have her, with your adoration maybe my fears will not come to pass”

Alex moved away from the counter not really wanting to leave, not understanding why and really not wanting to analyse the feeling. She couldn’t help but think that maybe this was something that she needed to think about with a clear head, and right now she didn't want to think about it at all. Maybe she would stop by Al’s on the way home, it had been a very strange night. The fuzzy off balance feeling seemed to have gone since the realization that there were two Lex’s although the other seemed to have vanished, unlike the return both timelines were not present, there was just this knowledge that this Lex wasn't the one that was here, and that also made her feel something. This woman didn't seem quite the monster he had been. She smiled at her and turned to leave the office.

“See you around Luthor”

Lex watched her prepare to leave, although the attempts to maintain her composure and to socialize had been hard and she was tired she did not really want Alex to leave there was an interest in her that she couldn’t pinpoint. She looked up at the use of her last name but there was no malice it was almost like when Lena called her Lexi.

“Not here as you quit, however I am sure that the city is small enough to make that assumption, see you around, Danvers”

Alex had stepped into the Elevator to leave the DEO before she even realized that she was genuinely smiling, she caught her reflection in the shiny surface and could see her face, her overall posture, it was lighter, happier. She would never have guessed that this would have been the outcome of the night, that the conversation that took place would have improved her mood. However it had she found herself genuinely hoping that she might bump into Lex again. The moment that thought entered her mind she noticed her eyes widened in shock. The feeling was genuine and confusing, she had entered the DEO angry full of loathing for the Luthors and from a conversation with Lex she found herself calm and was charmed by a word that she should associate with the older Luthor. That was something that she didn't want to think about at all, the wave that hit when she was talking to her the realization that this was different, the hope that this Lex could be better that was all it was right? She didn't want to think about it anymore, she needed a distraction, she needed to be somewhere else this could be filed away for a clearer head, but now, more drinking was in order.


	9. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys I hope that you are enjoying my twisted fic. I am back to work tomorrow so updates may be a little slower, not as easy to write when its a work day.
> 
> thank you for reading, comments and kudos is great to inspire, tell me what you think of my girls :)

Lena’s Lab (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 17:30………

Lena had worked all day, there had been meetings and paperwork, Jess had been invaluable all day meaning that she was free a little earlier than she thought she would be. She looked at the cube, she had it reestablished by some tech’s during the day, she would be able to work on the Kryptonite inside without risking Kara. Kara was on her mind a lot throughout the day, she had enjoyed their lunch and being with Kara, she couldn't help but wonder if Kara would still want to be around her if she knew that she wasn't her original Lena. it was like a second secret she was keeping from her, now she knew the truth she should tell her after all there was an agreement, they wouldn't lie to each other anymore, and she was lying, about her feelings for her, and about her origins. She slipped into some more Lab friendly clothes and headed into the cube to start the process of making Kryptonite, If Kara did come she could work on the other project while she was working on the kryptonite.

Sky above (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 17:30………

Kara finished her work and was hovering above the city, it was time to patrol, she was listening to the sounds of the city, Alex’s heart at the DEO, steadily beating, but also it seemed to be slowing, which was a good sign. Lena’s heart had been elevated for a little while, maybe she was worried about the kryptonite still, it wasn't excited, or scared, definitely anxious. She hoped that there was nothing wrong that she wasn't second guessing contacting her. She couldn't think like that, she needed to focus, the truth was all she wanted to do was go to the lab and be with her. She spread her hearing throughout the city pulling back from the heart that drew her. There was an accident on the highway, she turned and flew off to assist. Arriving in time to avoid two other car’s joining the accident. She managed to put out the small fire and then move the cars, taking a couple of moments to check that there was a way through for the emergency services before heading off to another issue. This one was a robbery, it took longer to fly over than to stop the inept criminals.

There were a few more saves before she was confident that she was no longer needed; she checked the time, it was already seven an hour and a half, where did the time go. She had planned something a little more special for dinner but she wanted to spend time with Lena so she opted for some National city food, she could spoil Lena another time. She collected some Pizza and Potstickers, some doughnuts, she headed to Luthor Corp, she preferred LCorp. It was less ominous and more Lena, but this world wasn't perfect, at least Lena was back in charge of the company now that was something. She landed around back and changed heading towards the entrance wondering if her clearance was good, she moved through the door and Joe the security guard smiled and welcomed her, she smiled back and held up the bag of food.

“Hi Joe, how have you been? Bringing food for the workaholic, is she in her office?”

“I’m doing good thank you, Kara, I think food is a great Idea, she doesnt look after herself, she is down in the lab”

Kara smiled and nodded heading to the bank of elevators stepping inside, she selected the floor, the door closed and she listened, she couldn’t hear Lena’s heart, she started to worry a little, no heartbeat meant that Lena was either missing or hurt, well dead, hurt people still had heart beats. Joe thought that she was in her lab which means if she was taken she would have not been seen. Kara started to pace the elevator moving too slow, closing in around her, her heart raced as she waited for the elevator to descend. The thirty seconds seemed to take forever as the doors opened and she sped down the hall towards the Lab. her heart raced faster, she tried harder to hear, was she out of Luthorcorp, was she somewhere else in the city. She couldn't hear her at all; she was not outside either, if the doors had not opened she would have busted through once she realised that she couldn't hear her anywhere. She couldn't hear her at all, she burst through the door using her super speed she got to the lab and burst in without using her pass key, as the door gave way under her strength she looked around to see the lead cage that Sam had once been in and came to a halt. Lena stood inside completely safe.

Lena’s Lab (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 19:00………

Lena had lost track of time, she had been working on the kryptonite she wasn't sure how long she had been there, she had managed to complete stage one on all the parts she needed. Intermittants thoughts of Kara wondering if she was busy, if she was safe, what had she found on patrol, would it keep her from coming? There were other thoughts too, more about if she should tell her if she should try to explain. She had just finished with the last part for today needing the parts to all crystalise so that she could start part two. She heard the bang and looked up as her heart raced, who was coming, she knew she shouldn't be making this, was it the DEO was it someone who wanted to hurt Kara. Her mother maybe, Alex? She didnt know which would be worse, Alex would kill her, Lillian would try to make her hurt Kara, she decided that was worse dead she couldn't hurt Kara. Then she saw it was Kara herself, her hand on her chest as her heart raced, her breathing ragged, when she realised it was Kara she calmed and smiled wide. The adrenaline and nerves covered with a somewhat flirtatious tone.

“Hey Kara, were you in a hurry?”

“I thought you were dead or hurt or dead, or taken I, I couldn't hear your heart, not here in the lab, not in the city, the elevator was slow and I panicked I thought oh Rao Lena, I am sorry about the door”

Lena moved through the cubes lead particle shield, the small ionized band around her wrist disrupting the field enough for her to pass safely through without risking any exposure not that she thought the different parts of the whole separately would hurt her, but she wasn't willing to take that chance. As she moved closer to Kara she could see how hard she was breathing, she really had been scared that she was hurt. She put her arms around the kryptonian and squeezed hard, she thought about how Lexi needed the harder contact when she was struggling how it helped her feel grounded and safe, she hoped that it would have the same effect on Kara. Her own heart was still racing from the noise and being shocked by the door breaking. She steadied herself as she held her.

The moment that she stepped out of the cube her heart rang in Karas head, Lena’s heart was elevated, shock, fear, not surprising since she had just broken through her door. She was moving closer and Kara stayed still she didn't want to startle her more, she watched the smile as she moved closer and then her arms, Lena had wrapped her up tighter than she had ever done before her arms holding her. She melted into the hug, wrapping her arms around her in return dropping the pizza on the side as she did so. She melted into the embrace burying her head into the crook of Lena’s neck, listening to her heart as it slowed.

“Lena I thought you were dead, I couldn't….. if anything happened, If I didn't stop it, I was so scared. I just got you back and oh Rao.”

Kara whispered out in relief at Lena being safe and in her arms, she wished that she was more than her friend but right now being held so tightly, was enough. Lena hear her through the whispers and her hair, as Kara seemed to tighten the grip further, she had been so panicked, maybe there was more between the other Lena and Kara, more than just the friendship they had, she took a breath and realised that she had to tell her, she wasn't her Lena and hoped that she would come to trust her, be her friend, she wouldn't ask for more, she didn't deserve it she had taken her place and Kara clearly cared for her a great deal more than she thought.

“Kara come on, sit down, I am fine I didn't realize you listened for my heart, If I did I would have warned you about the lead casement, I just wanted you to be safe completely from the Kryptonite, I wouldn't take a chance, not with you. I need to talk to you about something, I think it could change things but you deserve to know.”

Kara pulled back slightly and looked at the CEO, she could see the worry etched on her face, but her eyes were full of love. Kara again wished that the love she could see was less platonic that there was a chance for them. She wondered what it was that Lena was holding that was hurting her so she didn't like anything hurting Lena. She hoped that this, working with Kryptonite again wasn't causing this, it was supposed to show that Kara trusted her not put her into turmoil, she had already caused Lena enough pain. She smiled softly and placed her hand on her face.

“Hey Lena, I am here, I am not going anywhere, I promised, you remember, it's alright you can tell me anything Lena, come on let's sit down have Pizza and you can tell me whatever this is.”

Lena remembered those words, that she would stay that she would protect her, she smiled back and leaned into the touch worrying that this would be the last one that she would get, after all Kara, her Kara has not forgiven her, and this Kara she forgave the wrong Lena, what would this mean going forward? Would she try to find a way to bring her Lena back, would it mean that the new Lena would go after Lexi. Would she bring back the other? If Lexi and her were both exchanged then they would not be in pain, Lexi wouldn't have to deal with all the change she knew that she was struggling, and her mother's treatments were bad for her. Although the thought of her sister being gone, never seeing Kara again, caused so much pain in her heart. She moved over to the couch with Kara and sat opening the Pizza, and handing her a slice. Maybe with Pizza to eat she would be more open to what she had to say.

Kara could see the turmoil that Lena was stalling, she knew that whatever this was, well it must be a big deal, Lena was worried that it would change things between them, she hoped for a moment that it was a romantic change, but the pain on Lena’s face was not anxiety it was something far more difficult. For her,Lena only had this kind of issue when she was doing something that she thought Kara would like, or if there was something that was going to hurt someone that she cared for. Lena had been pushed away by so many people, deceived, manipulated and betrayed the thing that worried her more than anything was losing people, Kara had even been one of these, it pained her but whatever this was she wouldn't let it come between them not again. She wouldn't lose Lena again. She took the pizza and smiled placing her free hand on Lena’s knee.

“It's ok, take your time, but I am here and I am listening. Whatever this is we can get through this together.”

“Kara, you're always so patient and caring, you never give up on me, it's one of the things I love about you. I have been procrastinating enough about this and it is time I told you, as much as this isn't going to be easy it's the right thing to do. These past few months, helping defeat Leviathan, talking, lunch and now you here working with me, a Super and a Luthor working together again. It is more than I thought I would get, more than I deserved.”

The pause in Lena’s speech gave Kara time to think, why did this sound like a goodbye? Was there something wrong with Lena? Was she sick, Kara felt her heart increase in her chest beating heart enough to have broken through a less invulnerable chest. She looked at her, the way she was wringing her fingers showed the level of anxiety, she was hurting. Kara put her arms around her and held her close; she just needed to let Lena know she cared that she was there. She stroked circles into the small of Lena’s back and rested her head on the Luthors.

“Lena what's wrong? Please just breath Lena, It’s ok whatever it is, its ok”

“I’m what's wrong, Kara, it's me that is not right, well me and Lex…..”

Lena trailed off and looked down, she wasn't sure what to say, how to explain would Kara even understand, did she remember the world before? Did she realise that reality was altered? Lena didn't know how to continue, she had played this conversation over and over in her mind, she just couldn't seem to find the words now, not with Kara here, not with the loombing realisation that this would probably be the last time she got to talk to her, she wanted to stay with Kara more than anything but she also loved her enough to give her the information that could lead to her real Lena, she didn't deserve this reality maybe no version of her did.

“Lena I know what you're trying to say, I knew the moment you walked into my apartment to apologize. I walked away, left the door and moved to the table, I wasn't being mean. I needed a moment, your energy, the vibration was off, like with everyone that wasn't originally from Earth 39, Kelly, Nia, you and random people I don't know too. The merging of the two realities caught me off guard, and took a moment. Our relationship was paralleled, the differences that you thought Lex was dead, that your mother tried to have you killed, destroy the venture and well the russian Kara thing, not Lex, other than that everything was the same. I was confused at first, but not everyone is the exact person that they were, I can feel it, I was not in the resettlement, the merging, Paragons all of us were kind of in a void.”

Lena looked up slowly, did she have this right, did Kara know that she wasn't her Lena? Had she continued on anyway, had she forgiven her anyway? She remembered the time that her Kara had held her as she cried over losing Lexi, she explained Lexi and her difficulties, how she had been treated by lillian that hurt her and left her disorientated, that she had not meant any harm, her Kara had taken a while to understand but at the same time, she had realised that Lex wasn't herself when there was the fight with Superman. Did Kara have that memory now? Did she realise that Lexi was here too that she wasn't the man that did those terrible things? Would she hurt her? No Kara didn't hurt people not intentionally, she hadnt meant to hurt her she realised that, would the new Kara accept her too?

“You knew the whole time? Do you remember me telling you about Lexi? Why didn't you say anything before? Your not planning on going after Lexi are you, she really didn't have a choice in this Mother brought us both here, she only changed which of us were brought here, nothing else, Lexi didn't want this it was already um, well the male Lex crafted it mother just hijacked his plan.”

Kara smiled softly and pulled Lena in for another hug, holding her tightly and soothing her as much as she could. That was a lot of questions and Kara wasn't sure what was most important to answer what would slow the rapid beating of Lena’s heart. She had first been taken back by the change, worried about the differences, thought about how it was hard to look at her, Lena but not her Lena. Working with her, defeating Leviathan, Lena building the suit, her faith and courage, protecting her, she started to realise that she wasn't different; she was the same loving kindhearted woman with the best soul. The talk in the DEO she could see that Lena wanted to tell her something but stopped herself and opted for a break, those two weeks were so long for Kara so hard that she found herself drifting to Lena’s heart over and over the feeling that it wasn't her Lena melted away and was replaced with longing, the longing to be with her, to have her back, to be able to love her, however Lena would accept. She pulled back slightly and tilted her head upward to capture the emerald orbs.

“I remember the conversation about Lexi, how she isn't evil but had issues, I am not going after her, I am not going to try and undo this, Lena I knew you were a different Lena, It doesn't matter, you're still my Lena, I am not going anywhere. I didn't say anything because most people don't know, or realise the difference and saying anything just leads to confusion. The Lena from 39 she was working with Lex, Lex was working with Leviathan, everything was spiralling and I talked until I was blue in the face but she never managed to break the hold from the book, I was so happy to have you back, working with us, I didn't think trying to convince you that you were from another world was in anyway helpful. If I had known that you knew I would have, I wasn't keeping it from you”

Lena’s heart jumped a little at the way Kara called her, “my Lena” she allowed the words to wash over her and fill her heart with joy and hope for a moment as the information from Kara slipped over her, she just couldn't deny that she loved Kara, she was so glad that she accepted her, as she was, even from a different dimension, she just felt overwhelmed with emotion as she realised that Kara from any world would always be the purest heart the person that believed about all else in her ability to be good. The tears slowly started to fall and Kara pulled her in again holding her close. The conversation over both accepting the new information, they finished their food and a little work before heading home. One last hug as they were leaving.

“You really are my favorite person Lena, in any verse”

With that the Kryptonian took to the sky and Lena watched after her the thought in her mind once more, “I love her” the other thoughts, gave pause, maybe it wasn't as one sided as she thought.


	10. Sanver's reactivated?

Al’s Dive Bar (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:30………

Alex walked for a while, heading towards the bar, there was nothing to this thing with Lex other than the shift in reality, she was sure of it, after all how could talking to Lex Luthor be in any way a positive experience. This Lex she was honest, and open and she was strangely relatable, she was charming in a way, not suave and sophisticated, but raw, honest passionate, at least about Lena, she couldn't help but wonder what else brings that kind of passion out of her, she wondered what else makes the woman come alive like when she was talking about her sister. She wondered if that passion was transferred to the relationships she had? There was definitely passion in the relationship with Superman, Alex didn't want to think about Lex Luthor passionately in connection with Clark, was it a romantic thing that caused such destruction?, Every thought about Lex made Alex quicken her step she needed to get to the bar, a drink, she needed another drink. The way Lex said Danvers at the end of the conversation, hit something too, she just didn't have time to examine all these things, well maybe time wasn't the issue, she didn't want to. She arrived at Al’s and walked in, there were a few familiar faces lurking as she passed them to the bar, not paying any mind to them really. She ordered a double and downed it waiting for a second before taking a booth.

Sitting with the drink in hand she tried not to think about Lex, or Lena, or Kara even if everything was complicated, although less upsetting than earlier thanks to a little meeting with a new and improved Lex Luthor. She shook her head, she needed a distraction, it was not something that she needed, warm and fuzzy thoughts about the newest Luthor in town, they were all bad news. Her light was suddenly marred by a person standing at the table to her booth. She looked up and it felt like the world tilted again, because looking back at her was none other than Maggie, it was that the universe had some kind of twisted sense of humor, that the distraction she wanted couldn't be as simple as a few drinks and then passing out. No for Alex Danvers it had to be another complication, she knew Maggie was back, she hadn't been looking for her but here, it was Al’s of course this would be where Maggie was. It has been Al’s they used to spend time, had she subconsciously wanted to see Maggie? Was that why she found herself walking here?

Maggie flashed a smile full of dimples looking down at the red head, she flashed a bottle of tequila and two glasses. She had been over by the pool tables when Alex walked in, she could see she was distracted, looking for a drink this was something that she could recognize on the other woman, their need to block out the troubles with Alcohol and have sex until they passed out had been a thing after a bad day. It only took one of them to have a bad day and they would hit the heavy stuff, normal days were a few beers. Wine and beer at games nights, maybe they drank too much, enabled each other too much, but their relationship was full of passion and adrenaline, they had been through so much. They had loved each other, even managed to deal with some issues from the past, but they had too many differences with the future, she thought Alex would come around she usually did but it seemed as though children were the deal breaker. Alex had called it off and she left but now she was back, maybe this time she could change Alex’s mind.

“Hey Danvers, been a while”

“I heard you were back Sawyer, take a seat, I see you have already supplied shots, what are you doing back in National City?”

Alex looked at her, she was just as beautiful as always, that dazzling smile and the dimples that were her greatest weakness in the world. Her hair was shorter but not by much, and her body just as sinful as it had been the day they met. The familiar sense of desire sparked in the back of her mind, less potent than it used to be but still there. She supposed that it would always be, Maggie was her first love, that kind of link, well it never left. She tilted her head and watched her, as she slid into the booth opposite her. She had been wondering why she had been thinking about Maggie so much, maybe more happened with that shift than she thought, but here was the woman that drove her wild, in the flesh, she knew that nothing had changed but she would at least find out what she was doing back? She couldn't help the hopeful wish that she had changed her mind and was coming back for Alex. She downed the shot that Maggie had poured and watched her pour a second. Whatever brought Maggie to the bar was not a good day, much like old times.

“So Mag’s what brings you back to National City?”

“There was a new position in the science division, a promotion of sorts, a police liaison to the DEO, I thought it sounded like a good opportunity, and it would mean working with you again. We always made a good team Danvers”

Maggie looked at her as she sat there wondering if she would be interested in working with her again, not that she would have much choice; she already had the position and would be in Alex’s proximity. She knew that with time she could wear her down, that she would be able to remind her of why they were so good together. Maggie knew she was not the poster child for a healthy relationship, none of her relationships had worked out; they normally burned bright and hot and then imploded like a dwarf star creating a vacumous black hole. That had not happened with Alex, they had the passion and the excitement, but it didn't burn up. It was taken away by a small image of what the future should look like. Maggie believed that the thought of children, that need was; well it was a throwback from Alex’s belief that she would be married, to a man, with a child, a throw back from her confused life, before she knew she was gay. Maggie had broken through Alex’s perceptions of the world before she could do it again, Alex was the one that got away, a relationship full of love that never turned sour.

“Wow is your timing off Sawyer, I am sure that you will enjoy that position, getting to play with all the new toys in the Armory, getting to kick ass and get your action fix, but I quit, I don't work there anymore”

Alex downed the shot, she has never liked tequila but it did have its advantage, she had a low tolerance for it and that would mean that she would be nicely buzzed in no time not to mention she would be able to banish the nagging thoughts about Lex Luthor from her mind quicker. She queried her brow at Maggie who appeared to be staring at her curiously. She ran her hand through her hair and picked up the newly filled shot and downed it. She had a small shiver run down her spine as the alcohol burned her throat and the dizzying effect took over.

“Well shit Danvers, you couldn't have held out a little longer, I mean you have the haircut for the job, the badass attitude and not to mention, you if it's possible have gotten even more buff, you could give supergirl a run for her money now.”

“I know the gayest haircut ever right? Don't start I have heard it all, and funny you say that I literally just quit today, I need to be away from there it's not as it was, everything is political on a whole new level, and well you know me, I was there for one reason and that reason is on her way out the door too”

Maggie raised her brow, so the super was going to be leaving the agency too? Was she going to go it alone like Superman or was she hanging up that knows it all self righteous cape of here? Although she played nice with Kara and they had come to a less tumultuous relationship, Maggie still wasn't a fan of the super side of Alex’s kid sister, the one time they worked together they almost lost Alex and they had tried to get over it all but Maggie just didn't like the way supergirl always acted like she was right. Kara was cute and adorable but the super was irritating. The haircut Maggie actually wasn't sure about, it made Alex look more like a lesbian, and a bit butch, there was nothing about Alex that was top like when they were together she wore the pants, and that wasn't something that Maggie wanted to have changed, she liked being in control. She downed a few shots and refilled Alex’s glass too.

“Your not wrong, very gay, but hey nice to see you embracing who you are. Well that's a disappointment but that doesn't mean we cant hang out together, I mean after all we were great friends and partners first. So what's Next in line for you?”

“Well I thought about picking up where James left off, but with more style, less publicity and a whole lot less male ego and god complex. He turned into a right jerk, always pushing Kara, she continually had to choose between her friends, not to mention that his idiocy almost killed her. However unlike Kate I don't have billions behind me, so I will need a job, I was thinking about maybe working with J’oon again. What have you been up to?”

Maggie listened as she poured more drinks, she could see that Alex was starting to get a buzz going, her lips freer than normal, although she wasn't surprised to find the newest vigilante was Alex, she had always been a good soldier and struggled with the bureaucracy, however she did register the bite when she spoke about Kate. Maggie grinned and took another shot, was Alex jealous of her ex, more recent than Alex knew her and Kate had been on again while in Gotham, as always it was explosive, and the most recent fight was why she decided to look elsewhere. She was Maggie's Achilles heel, there was never a time that the excitement of Kate wouldn't stoke a fire in Maggie and she knew it, the relationship was the most impassioned of her life, even more than Alex, but it was more volatile too.

“Well I went to Gotham, a new fresh start but then it wasn't new or fresh, I guess I returned to what I knew, like now, but it wasn't the same, it was darker, made for some interesting adventures but there was the crisis, and well things seemed to change after that. I don't know what happened with Kate and the others, but she was different when she came back too. I wanted to be somewhere I could actually make a difference and here the Luthor family are doing that. I wanted to be a part of something again, I missed that, I missed National City, I missed you Danvers”

Alex was feeling the effects of the alcohol, she could feel the fuzzy head and the relaxing of her mind, the simple removal of her inhibitions, the easy feeling washing over her. So Maggie had missed her, she smiled at that small half smile almost a smirk. She liked that a lot. Then there was the use of Danvers as it had earlier in the day it made Alex linger for a moment, maybe that was it that was why it had an effect when Lex had said it, there was a trigger in her, that her sir name used in that was somehow erotic all alone, because of the association with Maggie, that made so much more sense, much more than finding Lex charming. Maggie clearly didn't remember the old timeline, where Lex was evil, and a man, she would need to be careful with that. So Maggie had been in contact with Kate, that shouldn't surprise her, after all they had been together before. Drinking more would be dangerous, she knew that she knew her and Maggie's patterns as well as every other in her life, she could easily fall back into bed with her. She almost didn't survive the first pass with Maggie and Kelly had helped her to see the relationship was not as perfect as she remembered and this was one of those things, the drinking and aggressive sex. At the thought of sex with Maggie her pulse quickened the arousal in the back of her head no longer as distant or soft as it was at the beginning.

“Yeah Sawyer I missed you too, you know Kate is pretty amazing according to Kara, and well the crisis kind of kicked everyone's ass. Things here are as always exciting, and yes a good cop like you could make a difference.”

Maggie smiled and flashed her dimples again softly stroking Alex’s hand as she refilled her glass. She downed another drink and stroked her thumb over Alex’s wrist, she was hoping for a little more than a conversation, it had been a while since she had sex, and Alex was always a itch she couldn't scratch in the back of her mind. Now faced with her she was more than happy to fulfill that need nagging in the back of her mind, Maggie didn't like to be the one pushed out, especially when she was invested, and she had been. She winked as she spoke.

“Thank you Danvers, you’re not so bad yourself, I was sorry to hear about you and Kelly, I always pictured you happy and Married with a kid by now, it was the only thing stopping me coming back, stopping me telling you that I still had feelings for you, seeing if we could try again. Here you are, single again and it's hard to hold that in.”

Alex felt the touch, the excitement and electricity shooting up her arm from it, the Alcohol flowing through her now she was clearly close to being drunk now, not just buzzed, the effect of the tequila clearly being felt, she grinned at Maggie as she felt the thumb brushing over her wrist it was familiar, intoxicating, it had been a while since she had felt that touch, not just any touch, but that of Maggie’s, her first, it was something that she thought about often more recently in the long nights where she hadn't slept, the second wave of change that had caused her to be off balance had disrupted her sleep and the longer she lay in her bed alone the more she craved human contact. Maggie had always known what she needed just like now, the soft touch, the care, the slow stroking of the fire within to relax and excite. It was an old move, some more sober part of Alex knew that but it was working.

The conversation continued it moved to reminiscing, Maggie as always kept the part of herself she didn't want Alex to see back. The relationship with Kate, cheating on Kate when drunk and alone because Kate was off being Batwoman. Things that she knew Alex wouldn't want to hear or would make her think of her poorly she wanted another taste of the Danvers woman and that would not aid in her getting that goal. Alex had been more and more tactile as the alcohol entered her system, Maggie loved the feeling of it, being the object of all Alex’s attention again it was intoxicating, more so than the tequila coursing through her veins. As much as she said she didn't want someone fresh off the boat at the start she had quickly come to adore the singular attention that the first received. Kate had always been indifferent, always wrapped up in duty and her mission, but Alex could see that the old pull was there and Maggie was relishing every moment.

She guided Alex to the door at closing, she placed her arm around the redhead and the familiar scent washed over her, Alex and alcohol mixing perfectly sparking more memories, a higher level of arousal. As they stepped outside Maggie turned her into the wall and pushed her up against it, roughly pinning her hands to the wall as she leaned in and kissed her. It was heated and full, Maggie claiming the lips pushing her tongue into Alex’s mouth fighting for dominance taking charge. Alex had responded with the passion she knew of old, struggling against the hold, the alcohol to touch Maggie, she didn't allow it, just continued to hold her, pushing her thigh into Alex’s core, thrusting up and moving her hips to increase the pressure. A moan fell from Alex’s lips as she continued her movements, enough to wind up the woman without being enough to bring enough friction to give Alex what she wanted. Maggie knew she had her the moment the moan fell from her lips, lewd and needy Maggie grinned as she moved to kissing and nipping at her neck, moving her hand down over her arm, shoulder, squeezing her breast and then slipping inside her jeans.

Alex’s mind almost exploded as Maggie bit her neck and gripped her breast, she moaned and gripped the wall knowing this dance, knowing that she wasn't to touch, oh how she wanted to. As Maggie's hand slipped into her jeans, her finger slipping into her wet folds, her fingers skilled and still holding the knowledge of just how to make her come undone. She threw her head back and arched into the touch. God she missed this, the passion, the raw excitement and the drive to possess her fully. Maggie's fingers plunged into her entrance and her heel pressing against her clit. Alex thrust back against her and moaned no longer caring if someone heard her. Maggie had pulled her hand out and she was spun again this time over a pile of crates, bent over them crashing her hips into them, the pain giving way to the adrenaline. Maggie had pulled her jeans exposing her and entered her again from behind using her own hip to increase the pace and pressure. She gripped the crates and moaned out with every thrust.

Maggie growled as Alex thrust back and altered their position, she wanted to ravage her take her, this was about her need to take her, to remind Alex of what she was missing. She was thrusting hard into her, her hand roughly grabbing her breast as she did. She could smell Alex’s scent as her fingers became slick with her juices. She wanted to taste her to devour her right there. Pulling out again she heard Alex whimper, that was the sound that she loved that made her wild, the need in Alex, calling to her, begging her, she pulled Alex up and laid her across the crates lowering her jeans further until she could gain access. She roughly pushed Alex’s thighs apart and gave her what she wanted a view of the wet slick folds, familiar and perfect. Maggie used her thumbs to open her further as her tongue ran a long slow path from her entrance to her clit the taste of Alex on her tongue. She finally latched on to her clit, teeth holding lightly as she flicked the exposed nerve with her tongue, her hand reaching under Alex's shirt, pulling the bra away and squeezing the breast, pinching the nipple as she thrust three fingers into her and thrust over and over.

Alex was already close, the three fingers hurt just the right way although the crates were digging into her, she was on the edge the pain from the crates the pleasure from Maggie's fingers and tongue melding within her drunken mind, causing her to moan, and move, her back arching as her breath became harsh and almost impossible to catch. Alex felt her orgasm hit and her muscles clenched. She was sensitive, too much but Maggie kept up the movements, the pain almost hitting an intolerable place before she was pushed over again, the second orgasm causing Alex to clench around Maggie. She knew that it was wrong that pushing through her sensitivity wasn't something that she wanted, it was about power, possession, domination. Kelly had taught her that, but her mind clouded by the alcohol, the familiarity and the second orgasm made her mute. Once she was uncleansed Maggie had removed her fingers and her mouth from her the cold air shooting the sting slightly.

Maggie had what she wanted, what she needed for now, she thought about having Alex return the favor but that wasn't what she wanted, she wanted Alex when she was more sober, she loved to dominate her but when it came to her, she liked the soft sleepy morning after girl, the one that worshiped her. She pulled Alex up, holding out her fingers, she watched as Alex dutifully cleaned them for her and then kissed her. Pulling back she smiled full force dimples, and kissed her nose. She was done for the night, it was time to head home. She watched as Alex pulled up her pants and adjusted herself putting her bra back over her breast and smoothing her shirt down. She placed her hand to the side of Alex’s face capturing her eyes, and smiling again she knew how to wield her dimples.

“I need to get going, I have an early start as do you, if what you said is right, a meeting with Lena, I would like to be a fly on the wall for that one. You were perfect as always, you good Danvers?”

Alex looked into her eyes, the dimples weakening her resolve, her body ached and there were going to be bruises in the morning, she groaned when Maggie spoke, she was going to be going home alone. She could see it in Maggie's face, what was this? Was it just once for old time sake? Alex was more confused now than when she was walking away from Lex, her mind hampered by the alcohol and the cum down, she knew she wasn't getting to touch Maggie, not tonight, maybe not ever, she felt as she did in the beginning that she was waiting on Maggie to decide if she was good enough and that was never a good train of thought for her. She would inevitably be weighed and measured and find herself wanting. She swallowed hard and nodded at Maggie, looking at her watch.

“Yes I have to be up, ugg in three hours, are we going to catch up again soon? I mean what is this?”

Maggie had grinned and turned away, always leaving them wanting more, seduction 101, she raised her brow. As she looked over her shoulder walking away.

“See you around Danvers”


	11. It's a small City after all

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:20………

The uneasy alcohol fueled slumber was broken by virulent sounds emanating from the alarm, Alex groaned her body stiff and sore to hit the snooze button, after doing this twice Alex finally pulled herself out of her bed, there was bruises and sore patches over her body, her mouth filled with the residual taste of Tequila her head pounding and swimming, thoughts memories from the night before infiltrating her consciousness. She pulled herself to her feet stumbling towards the bathroom she looked at her watch, Damn it she was going to be late. She washed her face and ran her wet hands through her hair, brushing her teeth as she hopped about pulling on her clothes from the night before. She stank like a brewery and looked like hell. Spitting out the gathering foam she took a look at herself in the mirror, she had drank too much, way too much. Her head pounding she grabbed her jacket and a bottle of water downing some pills to help. She hopped on the beast knowing that it was not safe but she was going to be late and if she stood a chance at soaking up this alcohol she would need something to eat. She wasn't looking forward to seeing Lena and now she was not even at full form.

She weaved through the traffic, a couple of narrow misses telling her just how much of a bad idea this was, she knew there was a diner near Luthor corp she could get something to eat there. She finally reached the destination and parked the beast heading into the place, she left her aviators on, the light of day too bright for her still and stalked through to the counter. At least no one knew her here, no reports going back to Kara she didn't need another “you drink too much I am worried” she ordered copious amounts of pancakes, donuts and a very large coffee. Turning back to the tables looking for a seat, there were a number of them, but sitting in a booth not far from her was none other than Lex Luthor. Was the woman stalking her? What was she doing here? She moved over aware that she stank, that the alcohol still burning off her would not be received well, she was sure that she would have seen her. What could she say to her, should she speak they were not exactly friends, and well as much as she was interested in this woman for some unfathomable reason, she was.

“Yup, long night, early morning, you come here often?”

Alex winced at the way that came out like a cheesy pick up line, and shifted a little awkwardly on her feet.

Andrews Café, Luthor Corp Plaza (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:00………

Lex was sitting in her same seat, in the same café that she had breakfast, her secret lab was opposite where she got to work without anyone watching her. She smiled to herself thinking back to Lena when she had tried to work out where she was hiding and never thought to look across the road, that’s why it was so brilliant. She liked the place it was quiet especially at this time, Lex had settled on seven because she would be finished before the breakfast rush started and long gone before it hit full swing, less people, less noise, less chance that she would have an interaction with someone. After all even in this world she still wasn't liked. No the world created by a madman had people revering him, envying him, fearing him, people didn't like him at all there was no earned respect just taken, people were not quite as actively hostile but she was playing his part, so she wasn't liked either. It would appear even with a rewritten world she was still hated. He had not changed the past as much so people still knew all the things that he had done, she had done things a little different but still caused destruction.

The bell on the door sounded it was unusual, meaning someone not normally there had entered, all the regulars in their seats. Another wild card as it were, Lex had not had any treatment for a long while waiting for Lena to come up with something less painful. She looked up to see a woman enter, leather jacket, unkempt reddish hair and shades, Lex watched in surprise as she realized it was Alex Danvers. What was she doing here? She didn't normally come here, between yesterday's clothes and the very unkempt look she didn't look like she had been home even. She had not seen Lex and was now approaching her, unaware of Lex watching, she looked like she had not slept, showered or ate since their last conversation, based on her appearance and the abundance of food. As she moved closer Lex could smell the alcohol, they had not consumed that much together, Lex smiled and she had enjoyed her time with Alex in a strange way. Alex had looked up and spoken to her.

“Well yes I do actually it is a convenient location, I am able to have the same booth, I can see both exits, no one can see me from outside or approach me from behind, there is a low staff turnover and the specials are the same each week, not to mention the eggs are the best in the city”

Lex registered the question and as always responded literally, giving the facts and information requested. Her upbringing, the lessons from her mother, the attempts to fit in, to hide that she was different, said that she shouldn't always do that, but trying to decipher the tone and the emotions and everything else that can be behind a question was too hard. Especially at the moment, all the change causing her to be uneasy in almost all company, her routines keeping her stable, and this, having Alex Danvers the inconsistent variable herself strolling into her café during her normal breakfast time was definitely changed. Was she here to keep an eye on her? Social convention dictated offering her a seat, which wasn’t part of her normal routine but as anxious as the changes were making her feel, the strange realization that somehow she was feeling almost normal, or what passes for normal to her, having Alex there.

“Feel free to join me”

Alex lifted her brow and winced as she sat at the table, taking another large bite of the doughnut and chewing, the sugar was helping with the tiredness and the dough helping to absorb the alcohol, whatever was remaining in the stomach. She knew that in her current state she was no match for Lex Luthor and that this was probably a stupid thing to do, but there was this easy feeling that she was starting to associate with the woman, it must be because it lessens the residual effect of the shift in time. Perception of the distortion wasn't something that Alex liked very much and with the other things going on with her right now it was a little bit of comfort.

“Last night the drinks seemed like a good anesthetic but this morning the healing power of tequila is well, less than evident.”

She finished the doughnut and started on the stack of pancakes, she was a little concerned that the pungent smell of alcohol was going to disturb Lex, she didn't mean to drink so much and she should have showered not that the alcohol seeping out of her skin would have been removed but it would be less stale she guessed. If Lex had noticed she didn't seem to feel it was necessary to mention it, she was continuing to eat her breakfast. Alex wondered why it was that Lex had offered her a seat. It wasn't something that she would have expected after all they were not friends, they had only really ever had one conversation. Although this one had just pointed back to something from last night, what had Lex called her was an inconsistent variable. Now she was talking about the location like it was part of a wider routine in her life. Alex was curious about this, was the difficulty with her more because she didn't fit into the routine? Lex wasn't military so why was that so important to her? She looked at the points Lex made and nodded in appreciation if she was sitting in Lex’s seat it would indeed be perfect.

“Well that is a very astute assessment, are you sure you haven't been in the military? So routine is important to you then?”

Alex seemed to be in some difficulty when moving her body stiffer than normal, she had observed her before, she had power, strength and grace when she moved, but today it seemed labored. She watched as Alex took a massive bite. She deduced that it was connected to the alcohol consumption the night before, her whole plate was carbs designed to soak up the remaining alcohol she was sure. She liked the fact that Alex ate, her mother had drilled it into them that women shouldn’t eat like this in public, but Lex didn’t understand, if she was hungry she would eat. There was a lot about the perception of common place rules for women that seemed strange to her, after all why was there a bias towards me? They could eat what they wanted, sleep with who they wanted, there was nothing that seemed to be wrong with that, they were growing men, springing their seeds. Women however were gluttonous, sluts, there was a whole divide that made the sex’s different and Lex just didn’t see it that way.

“Quite the appetite you have, not that it shows of course. Not military no, and routine is good, however it appears I am the most hated woman in the world in any universe, it would appear that when rewriting the world, he liked the level of fear and hate so left it, only here it isn't so obvious as to who hates me, at least on my earth it was a safe bet that everyone did, so there is a safety factor, all the staff I know and have vetted and there is a simplicity to things in order, a beauty like a balanced equation”

Why did she feel the need to pay a compliment, there wasn’t a social convention that said she should. She looked back at Alex, maybe it was the fact that she looked a little uneasy, disheveled and clearly not quite firing on all cylinders at the moment, was there something emotional behind it, she felt compelled, like she wanted to make the woman feel better, yet another conversation for her and Lena. She didn’t know why she was interested in why Alex had such a long night but she was, the woman a mystery to her, setting a curiosity in Lex.

“So the night continued after you left me, why such a long night?”

Alex looked at Lex the fork halfway to her mouth, she stilted for a moment looking at her, she put the pancakes in her mouth and chewed. Lex Luthor just paid her a compliment, it wasn't like the ones you give when trying to flirt, it came with an observation of her mound of food and seemed to be factual. However the compliment was there just the same, Lex thought she had a nice body, she thought about her body? Why would Lex think about Alex at all. She tried to clear her mind a little, why a long night? Well that seemed like a simple question if it hadn't been that particular night, could she really talk to Lex about this? She hasn't spoken to Kara about it, she was her normal person for girl talk. Not that she would like this particular course of action, what happened with Maggie should probably be filtered before she speaks to Kara.

“Well leaving the DEO, I decided to go to have a drink, although I knew that my Ex was back in town I had not thought that I would be bumping into her so soon. What was it you said about the likelihood of bumping into each other eventually based on the size of the city. Well it happened less than two hours after I found out she was back.”

Alex winced a little, she had just come out to Lex she didn't mean to do that, it was not that she had an issue with her sexuality, the haircut alone said she was out and proud, but this was not something that you shared with a stranger. And one conversation doesn't stop Lex Luthor being a stranger and a dangerous one at that. She took a breath and continued.

“The split was because of a difference in future plans, not through a lack of love, so the conversation needed a little, well a little courage shall we say it was not easy seeing her again after so long.”

Lex had watched her eat, and registered the shock although Alex hid it well, she had clearly not thought about the implications of talking about this with her and shocked herself by being open. She guessed that Alex didn’t know everything about her. Or her leanings, she always found women more attractive; she didn’t really date, but she only had intimate relationships with women. It was clear that Alex was a lesbian, even if she had not known through her research. It wasn't the trademark Leather on the bike, not even the haircut, it was the way she held herself, the way she behaved around others, the protective nature and the somewhat masculine energy she gave off. Lex had not given much thought to anything after their first conversation; although there was a chance they would run into each other eventually, she wasn't expecting this. She wasn't expecting to see her so soon, for her to stay, this conversation, this one was a surprise so to speak. She had noticed Alex’s attractiveness but she was not expecting anything, it would hardly be anonymous and with Lena there would be other considerations. She listened to the story of the night at the bar and nodded along as she listened.

“I can see how that would have required additional alcohol, I am not one for relationships, although it would be nice I suppose. Men are less complicated and fewer emotions to navigate, but they are not to my tastes, women are complex and emotional which causes its own difficulties, but alas they are my preferred company.”

Lex had no issue with her sexuality or the fact that her contact was one night in general and anonymous she played the hand dealt her. Men were good for working alongside, they were simple and easy to manage once you got past their ego, but the thought of them touching her left her cold. She raised her brow and looked at Alex, she was not sure why she would tell her this, maybe she thought that there was a possibility that they were comparable acquaintances, they appear to have a lot in common.

Alex listened to her, it would appear that Lex herself was gay, she had not known this, that made the previous compliment slightly more loaded, although she was sure that there wasn't a romantic context to the complement, but it made sense that she would have noticed her. If she hadn't just taken a rather large bite of the doughnut she would have asked a question or prompted for more from Lex. as it was her silence seemed to be enough to get Lex to continue, she listened intently.

“I am not exactly a catch when people know who I am so I would think of myself as more of an ethically promiscuous, anonymity is my friend, however I have noted that a second meeting can be difficult. So last night became difficult and drinks became many, did anything get resolved?”

Lex was interested in how the night panned out, it wasn't just the curiosity in regards to Alex herself, there were other reasons, she now showed an interest. There were many studies into the art of forgiveness, the possibilities of what can and can’t be forgiven, she knew that there was a parallel between breakup resolution and people’s ability to forgive. The emotions involved in moving from friends to lovers to enemies back to friends which could happen with relationships, after all once the pain and emotions are gone there was normally a reason that people were drawn together in the first place. Knowing how her inconsistent variable navigated this, would show if She had a hope with the older Danvers girl. Did she just think of her as her inconsistent variable? Lex was clearly more unstable than she felt.

Ethical promiscuity, that was new to her, wasn't that just a fancy way of saying anonymous one night deals. With the exception of Sara, that wasn't Alex’s deal at all, she needed there to be a connection, and well sara there was an alcoholic and broken heart connection. She wondered how that would go for Lex, one night things with people, she didn't seem to have passion unless it came to Lena, was it regimented or did that passion come out then too. Alex shook her head. Was she really just contemplating the sexual exploits of Lex? What did she ask more painful to think of probably but far less scary. Was there any resolution? Alex almost laughed like there could be after last night there were just a million questions, things that couldn't be understood in her current state, after all she was hung over, sleep deprived and currently confused. She couldn't tell Kara all of what happened she wouldn’t understand and well she wasn't going to spill it all to Lex either, this was something that she would need to work out on her own, and fast. She was drawn to Maggie, she would always be drawn to her, she had a place in her heart regardless of what happened before or now, she was always going to be the woman that changed her life.

“Well Maggie, that's her name, she was the person who helped me understand what was going on with me, that I was gay, she was the first woman that I was ever with. My first relationship that lasted, we were going to get married, everything was planned and then there was a problem.”

Alex took a sip of her coffee and a moment to collect her thoughts. After all there were a lot of them now swirling in her mind, she had no idea what to attend to first. She was struggling to unpack just how that happened last night, she knew that was a part of their relationship that wasn't the healthiest, talking to Kelly had shown her that, she thought she would be stronger after all this time but she wasn't, she could blame it on the alcohol, and she was sure it played a part, but that wasn't it, she had been thinking about her all day, it was like she manifested her, and the desire was still softly burning, she knew what would happen if she let it and she drank anyway.

“She was my first real love and we were still very much in love when I realized that my future and hers didn't match, we talked, we looked at options but it all boiled down to one simple fact, I wanted something that she would never want. I had to tell her to go, she left, not just the apartment but the city and she has been gone for three years, Last night well everything just seemed to put me right back where I was and there was no clarity only more confusion, so no resolution…..you know how it is with love, you have been in love before right?”

Lex listened to her, she had not realized that the ex was a first love, that complicated the equation, there wasn’t such a direct correlation. The first woman that she had been with, the first long term relationship, the first person she loved with all her heart, why was nothing simple, this woman never gave her information that worked in a neat equation. She tilted her head and looked at her.

“I see yes, that does change things considerably, the first love is considered the most memorable and the most devastating of a person’s life. It is the one that causes the hardest lesson to learn”

Lex remembered the time she fell in love, although the emotions were different and processed differently the feeling of belonging and the way that person became her world was the same, it was the break up that caused her depression and attempt that brought the super into her life. The woman in question had been her everything and when there was a split, when she couldn't cope with Lex the way she was, she tossed her aside. Her descent had been gradual no one had noticed, her mother otherwise engaged and Lena off at boarding school, she had nothing to stabilize her. Lex didn’t want to think about that at all and when Alex asked if she had been in love her first instinct was to deflect it, ignore it, she didn’t give that level of information to people. She looked at the way Alex was looking at her; there seemed to be no malice, just curiosity and Lex understood that well. Maybe the Danvers woman was as curious about her as she was about her, she needed to answer in a safe way she could feel that there was too much in her mind to contain everything.

“I am not the monster that I am portrayed as, and although emotions are different for me and connections, it doesn’t mean that I don’t form them, I have formed attachments and there was a first. I found understanding, her needs difficult and she wasn’t able to express them in a clear way. The ambiguity created misunderstandings and arguments that caused it to end, the ambiguity makes it harder for me, I can't read the situation and act how I am supposed to.”

Lex looked away remembering it again and the subsequent driving incident. She wanted to change the subject so she could feel the thoughts intruding again thinking about her first break leading to her meeting the super. The super that interfered and drove her to the brink of insanity over and over, that led her to the confines of 7734 and eventually the sanitarium. She needed to change the subject and bring it back to Alex to calm herself, a new topic anything would do, what had Alex asked if she came here often, maybe something similar.

“I already know that you don't come here often, So what brings you here?”

Alex could see that there was something going on again within the woman, like last night it looked like she was fighting herself, Last night she had thought that maybe it was a migraine but this seemed transient, almost like there was something that caused her pain, something that came and went, they were talking about Lena and Kara, then about the government when she had issues last night, today it was about love. Alex didn't see the connection although both resulted in the same kind of behavior in Lex. It was interesting to say the least, she wished she wasn't so hungover, although that was slowly subsiding. There seemed to be emotional content but Lex said she didn't experience them the same, that she caught, connections, emotions and relationships were different for her, something in the back of her mind was piecing things together but she wasn't quite there yet. 

Lex Was counting or doing something she could see the small lip movements, like not quite forming words a mutter inaudible but it was there, clearly this was some kind of mantra something that was helping or hurting she couldn't tell, it was if both, like some of the things were helping some making it worse, things that were causing her difficulties in the conversation being countered. Alex watched intently and hoped that there would be some answers soon. Next time she sees Lex she wants to be sober enough to make some clear distinctions.

“After the late night I didn't have time this morning to have food, I have to meet Lena at twenty past seven so I just stumbled in here to have something to eat in an effort to be functional when I meet her.”

Lex recited numbers and patterns inside her mind to calm her as she waited for a response from Alex. 14372, 275736, 47264, twin primes, 1-3, 3-5, 5-7 not 7-9 because it's divisible by three. The voices were receding, the heavy feeling in her limbs, her lungs taking in oxygen, returning to the status quo. She was feeling better by the time Alex spoke giving her the ability to focus on the things that she was saying.

“You are here less than twenty four hours after I heard you suggesting you would deal with her, for a meeting with my sister, who you admitted yesterday were less than happy to have in your life in any respect? Although at the end of the talk you said you would not harm her, you seemed less inclined to spend time with her than someone who was about to see her the following morning.”

Lex turned her head slightly and looked into her eyes. The small twitched in the corner of her eyes suggested that she was thinking of a way out maybe? She tilted her head again. Alex was clearly not meaning to give this information out, she was hiding something and it wasn’t that she was using Kara’s friendship with Lena to get a quick job. Was yesterday's conversation just to appease her, so that Lex would lower her guard?

Alex’s mind sharpened for a second on one thought. “SHIT”


	12. Is it a date? - not sure about this

Kara’s Loft (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:00………

Kara woke as always with the sun energizing her cells, she had loved her time in the Lab with Lena although the conversation was hard it was important, she couldn't understand why Lena would think that her coming from a different earth would turn her away, after all she suffered kryptonite and still loved her, this was just another twist in their journey. Lena was meeting Alex today Kara listened in, Alex was still sleeping, although her rhythm was off she should have checked on her. It sounded like she went out and got drunk. A pang of guilt hit her and she decided that she would go to her later and make sure she was alright. She listened into Lena, she was up and already pacing, her heart giving way to the anxiety she was feeling. She knew Lena was worried about meeting with Alex, they had not had an easy reconciliation even though Lena had saved them all again she couldn't forgive her, she knew this from the conversation the other day. She thought for a moment about the situation, then she had an idea, Alex when drunk needs food, and Lena doesn't eat breakfast unless someone makes her. If she took breakfast for them, took it to Lena’s office they would have something to break tension. It's hard to be angry when you have sugary goodness to eat.

Kara sped into the shower and then out the window in her super suit, she would go to noonans last, but first she was going to get the scone things from Ireland as a treat for Lena, then coffee sticky buns and doughnuts from noonans. She rose high above the city before hitting full speed and creating a sonic boom. She would be back in plenty of time.

Lena’s office Luthor Corp (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:10…

Lena had been up for hours, she was finally in the office, she wished that there was a difference between her and the other Lena, that she could tell Alex that it wasn't her that did those things to Kara but she did. Alex had been hostile and well quite rightly so when she had found her at Kara's she had not trusted her but had worked with her. She knew that she was angry and that she was likely to receive many more unpleasant warnings and conversations with Alex. she had called Alex in for seven twenty, it was the point of cross over, she could let Alex up without being seen, then if there was any issues they would hopefully be over before her staff arrived at nine. She didn't want a spectacle not now, she just wanted to get the project started, Kara protected and out from the DEO. she was sure that there was more going on there than Lexi knew, she would have a better idea tomorrow when she brought over the paperwork for breakfast.

The thought of breakfast made Lena’s stomach rumble, she was hungry but nervous, Jess would be in for an hour or more. She started to think that maybe she should have stopped at the café, but she wasn't supposed to see Lexi until tomorrow she didn't want to upset her, she had been doing well since the last treatment and Lena wasn't quite ready to try hers yet. A familiar sound of a cape flapping and a set of leather boots landing on the balcony called her attention. She almost laughed as she watched Kara trying to juggle countless items and open the door, she looked so cute and a little helpless. She wondered if she had heard her stomach when on patrol but that was ridiculous. She moved to the door and opened it letting Kara in the cold wind bracing, she closed it behind her and looked at her, the woman was adorable in every sense of the word putting out food and drink on the desk and then turning to pull her into a hug.

“I thought that you and Alex may find it easier to talk over breakfast, something to break the ice. She quit the DEO yesterday and I think she may be a little hung over.”

Lena smiled softly as she was pulled into the hug and listened to Kara. The thought that Alex could be hung over didn't help at all; that would probably make her already tenuous grip on her anger looser and Lena in the firing line. She looked at the food with a clear distinction about who’s food it was. When she spotted the scones her eyes widened, they couldn't be could they, not real ones? Lena pulled back and looked at Kara, it was as if she knew what she was going to ask as the moment she looked at her she looked at the food and blushed lightly.

“Did you fly to Ireland to get me those?”

Kara had been rumbled; she knew there was no denying what she had done. She bit her lip and looked back, her cheeks heating more. She thought to herself, friends do that right she had not over stepped had she, Rao she hoped not. She nodded lightly and looked at her.

“You were so worried about today, and then this morning when I checked in with your heart, you were anxious and I thought that some home comforts would settle you a little as well, you told me about that little bakery place and I was up early although I didn't realize it was so late over there, but the people were really nice and had some already baked. They were supposed to be for the morning but they seemed happy enough to give them to me”

Lena put her finger on Kara’s lips to stop the rambling, it was a mistake they were so soft pressed against her finger she couldn't help imagine how they would feel against her own, on her skin, soft kisses trailing over her body, she had a pang of arousal hit her below her abdomen it was stupid to do that. She pulled her finger back and smiled at Kara who seemed almost as dumb struck as she was.

“Thank you, you don't need to go to that kind of trouble but thank you Kara that is so very sweet of you.”

Kara blushed brightly, her ramble was cut short by Lena’s finger, oh Rao it was touching her lips, she was pressing the digit onto her so softly the long slender fingers of the CEO were suddenly brought to the forefront of her mind. The thoughts she had were anything but innocent. She had thought about this kind of thing before obviously but not like this, not with Lena so close, touching her, she wanted to suck the finger into her mouth to have it touch her more in different places, places she never let anyone touch her. She had always been able to keep people satisfied without giving everything of herself, in this moment she would give all to Lena everything she wanted, if only she wanted that too. As she removed her finger Kara had to control the whine that wanted to escape. Instead she turned and picked up the coffee handing it to her.

“It's no trouble, I like to fly, what time is Alex getting here? I don't want to interfere.”

Lena looked at her watch, it was already twenty five past maybe Alex decided not to come, maybe she was hung over and decided to rearrange, she picked up her phone but there were no messages. She looked back to Kara, a small sad smile playing on her lips.

“I don't think she is coming, she was supposed to be here five minutes ago and she isn't known for her tardiness.”

Kara stood still for a moment honing her hearing to the familiar heart beat of her sister, she heard it beating steady, she was less inebriated, she was close downstairs but not in the building close enough that she could zone in on her enough to hear her heart when it spiked, nothing scary or dangerous, more like that moment when you realise that you shouldn't have done something, like eating the last cookie. The crease in her brow was more evident for a moment, she wondered what Alex could have done, she wasn't moving so it definitely wasn't dangerous.

“She seems to be in the plaza somewhere talking to someone I think, oh Rao I hope she hasn't run into Maggie, her heart rate is up a little. I was going to tell her that she was back the other day but she wasn't in a good place, Maggie is always going to be Alex’s weak spot. I would go check but I am not sure if it is Maggie that she would want me there, especially like this.”

Lena marveled at the way she did that, the concentration being able to pick out Alex’s heart, and the mood, she was going to have to be more careful about what she did. If she could hear Alex’s heart that easily from there then she would have heard how her heart reacted to touching her lips. She bit her lip and then wondered why she hadn't noticed it before, Kara always knew the moment she was sad, happy, anxious or scared. She had always been listening, how could she be so oblivious to her feelings, maybe she wasn't, but just didn't return them. She smiled and sighed softly looking at the crinkle on Kara’s face. She couldn't help herself. She lifted her hand once more and rubbed her thumb over it, smoothing it out.

“Don't worry about Alex, she will always come to you when she needs someone, that's the best thing about having a sister. Alex loves you as much as Lexi loves me, and you and I return that, she knows you're there the moment she needs you. Now there is a city that needs to see that its Hero is in the sky watching, I know I always look out for the seven thirty patrol.”

Lena also looked for the one at five thirty and ten, but she didn't need Kara to know that right now. She watched her nod and they shared another hug before Kara opened the door and took to the sky. 

“Be safe Kara”

Andrews Café, Luthor Corp Plaza (National City) 14-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:25……

Alex tried to come up with something that she would be able to tell Lex something plausible after all the whole super friends was supposed to be kept from Lex, but that was when Lex was a man, and evil as hell. This Lex wasn't like that she was starting to see that she was much more than Alex had thought. Mainly because Alex had put her into a LEX is EVIL box chained it up and stored it in her mind with all other horrific things that she had witnessed too. She didn't think about her in any other respect, not as a person, not as a man, a woman no incarnation of Lex Luthor was in her mind in any other function. Although since last night there were other thoughts filtering in, and a comfortable feeling.

“Well I am out of a job and I need a new one, something that pays well and well Lena is all about nepotism when it comes to people she cares about, Luthor Corp is a big company there has to be something that she has going.”

Alex cringed internally, had she really just come up with that lame ass excuse for meeting with Lena, she hoped that Lex wouldn't be all that interested, but her experience of Lex so far was like her and Kara, nothing was overlooked. She saw the passion, the determination and the desire to protect her sister no more than twelve hours ago.

“You think that Lena’s guilt over her actions can be manipulated into giving you preferential treatment and a job? Lena is aware that nepotism is not good business sense. What position is it that you are looking for within Luthor Corp? That you hope my sister will afford you?”

Lex wondered if Alex would answer or if this would be the end of the unexpected conversation, a conversation with someone Lex was actually enjoying the company of; as much of a surprise as that was, even if it was uncomfortable. The change in routine, the lack of distance and the questions throwing her off balance but things were alright and she was enjoying the conversation to a degree, not to mention she was managing her symptoms better the interactions affording her the ability to practice. It was helping her, she could feel it, who would have thought that such a person would be helpful to her when all she craved was stability and consistency.

Alex ran over what she said and what Lex had said in return, it was bad she could see how her mind would have jumped to the same conclusion, that this person was trying to manipulate the other. The very thing that Lex had said had happened to Lena over and over again, that she had accused all the super friends of and here she was giving her evidence of the very thing. She wasn't reacting emotionally, but then Lex didn't seem to, she was curious maybe, god she hoped that she hadn't just set Lex Luthor on her tail to ensure that nothing happens to Lena, after all a secret group working out of the city was supposed to be secret she was as bad as Kara. What was it about Luthors that made Danvers girls talk like this? She had training, she was a secret government agent for years and no one knew, ten minutes with Lex and her new secret is already on the verge. She was finishing her food trying to by time, but it was all gone now just like her breathing space, she sat up and brushed her hand through her hair, it was knotted and a mess, shit Danvers your a mess, she knew she needed to get her life back together.

“Well it isn't like I am going to be able to provide references easily, and I am good with science and security, and well Lena knows who I worked for and what I have done in the past. I could be put to use in the Lab as a tech or maybe on the security team, I mean it isn't like Luthor corp is devoid of threats.”

Lex watched as her questions registered on Alex’s face, she seemed to make more of an effort to finish her food. Lex’s questions were making her react emotionally but she wasn’t sure if it was anxiety, embarrassment or something else. She was stalling for time, then the response was curious, Lex was well aware of Alex’s abilities.

“Do you have an interest in science? your education suggests you are too bright for lab work if you were serious about making your way in science you should consider applying for something more in your field, Security Alex isn’t that just the same as you do now? That would be a sideward move and not necessarily the right fit for someone who dislikes the person she is protecting, you are good at what you do now because you have a vested interest in protecting your sister, the city, the world. You would not have the same inclination when it came to my sister.”

Was that sarcasm? Was Lex being sarcastic, a small chuckle came from Alex’s mouth. The other thing that registered was the compliment that one wasn't even valid in something else, it wasn't handed, she was complimenting her mind. Lex was a genius and had just alluded to the thought that Alex was intelligent. The shock registered on her face, she was unable to contain the blush that was starting to creep up her neck.

“Wow coming from you that is possibly the complement of the century.”

She wasn't feeling all that smart at the moment she needed space time, a break to think about what she could say to throw her off, her mind ever in a sarcastic mood threw out something ridiculous.

“Would you have dinner with me?”

Lex had just complimented her again, two in one conversation this was clearly something to analyze at a later point Alex was looking at her. She was once again compelled by something in her to do so, it always confused her when there was an emotion that she didn't understand or couldn't point out changing her reactions. She replayed what Alex had asked. Lex was curious as to the meaning of the question? Was she asking her on a date? Or was she trying to distract her? Lex struggled weighing up the possible reasons for this sudden change and decided that more time would give more information.

“You want to take me out to dinner? That is a curious suggestion Alex, after all you have shown little or no interest in me other than as an evil doer needing to be stopped, someone who is a threat to your sister and yourself. Although I can see a certain amount of curiosity in you, in your connection to me, opinions don’t change overnight, and now you're asking me out?”

Part of Lex wanted it to be a date, to see if this ability Alex had to help her change her mind and win was soothing that could be nurtured, and her strange response to the woman needed more analysis and information. However the more sensible scientific part had analyzed it and realized that there was a motive and intention behind this apparently spontaneous request. Still that part of her that wanted it to be a date was waiting with baited breath for the answer, did she like the salty Danvers woman?

Alex was still kind of off balance regarding the compliment, she looked at Lex, was the date something so far out of left field? Had she meant it? She wasn't sure, the compliment had made her feel good, Lex was a genius, she had spoken to her, been honest, complimented her body, listened to her. Although Lex was wrong in one aspect, she had been able to change her opinion over night, it wasn't like she had really contemplated it, but the evil person she had in her mind wasn't Lex, she wasn't good or bad, but she was interesting and Alex wanted to know more. She was starting to feel that comfortable feeling, the curiosity that she had about Lex was rooted in something more, did she find her attractive? Well you would have to be blind not to have soft silky dark hair, her eyes were deep and dark full of mysteries depth and intelligence, she had sculpted brows, possibly better than Lena’s or was Alex biased? Her lips were full and looked soft, the small scar on her lips were another curiosity, it didn't detract from her beauty, it just made her look strong and brave in some way. She had a sculpted jaw and a somewhat sinful neck that looked like it would be very sensitive and responsive to kisses. Alex swallowed, she was interested in getting to know her, she was finding her more appealing than she should and she should definitely not be staring.

“You think I am too intelligent for lab work? I don't expect to get a free ride just a chance. I am not afraid of hard work and I can start at the bottom. As for the dinner, I came over and spoke to you, I sat with you for breakfast, incase you didn't notice there were alot of other options but I chose this one, this seat with you, after our talk last night, I would like to get to know you better, is there something wrong with that? Would you like to have dinner with me?”

Lex looked up. She heard the shock in Alex’s voice. Why was she shocked? She knew her own resume. She had listened to her, she had come to sit with her, whereas yesterday she had told her she didn’t want to be anywhere near her. Was it the social convention that you stop and speak to an acquaintance? Was it that she had her at the table. She couldn't think of one, a polite nod to acknowledge the others existence was all that was really called for.

“Alexandra Danvers, PHD MD, Alex you are a bioengineer, physician, scientist and a field agent of the DEO, former agent, hardly a lab grunt.” 

She paused a moment thinking about the other statement in regards to the seats.

“That you did Alex, there were other seats available, your logic and observations have improved with the complex carbohydrates it would appear”

Lex had smiled and let out a soft chuckle at that, Lex sat and wondered if she really meant this, she was skilled at spotting a lie, she had lived with Lillian after all she trained her, but Alex had training too. Lex wanted to believe that Alex meant what she was saying, why did it matter to her? She wondered if there was something creating a focus on Alex she hadn’t seen.

Alex laughed, Lex was the only person that she had ever met that could suggest that eating your weight in doughnuts and other carbs actually make you more intelligent with enough confidence that it was believable, after all they had helped soak up the residual alcohol, she wasn't sure if Lex had been intentionally funny although the soft chuckle suggested that she had meant to be.

“Don't ever say that to Kara, it's hard enough to convince her to eat fruit and veg as it is, so dinner?”

Alex wasn't sure why she was pushing this so much, Lex was already distracted from the harder questions, but she was still asking, she found that she actually wanted to see Lex again, that she wanted to go out with her, a date, she wasn't sure, she couldn't be one of Lex’s ethically promiscuous people, and she was far from anonymous at this point. Was that why she wanted clarification to know if there would be physical aspects to the date.

“Well there was no clarification about the purpose of the meal, other than to eat, and I can see that at least on some level you have become more comfortable with the offer. I don’t believe the first offer was necessarily as innocent as you appear now”

Lex looked at her and the second invitation was different, calmer more certain, it would appear that Alex did want to see Lex again, the third was even more sure like she seriously wanted an answer. Although the reason for the first request was clearly some form of deception, a ruse, or to by time it would appear that the red headed woman had thought about it and decided that it was indeed an offer that she could stand by. However there was not enough in the second request to have Lex comfortable with the remaining ambiguity, so she decided on a compromise of sorts.

“I eat at CharMichaels on a Friday, I have a standing reservation, 7pm, if you wish to join me there I would not be opposed to the company”

She glanced at her watch five minutes behind schedule, the uneasy feeling washed over her and she looked up. Lex couldn’t bring herself to accept an offer of dinner when there was ambiguity around it. It put too much pressure on her, the new world and the change in her routine was enough. She stood ready to head to the door and her lab.

“See you around Danvers”

Lex exited, trying to avoid making hypotheses about Alex’s behavior, she didn’t need to enter a manic phase, be fixated, she had work to do. There was something about that Danvers girl.


	13. Common goals

Andrews Café (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:35………

Alex was left staring at the retreating form of Lex Luthor, she was dumbfounded at what the hell had happened in that moment. Why had she felt compelled to sit with her in the first place. The woman was interesting, a curiosity and nothing like she would expect, she wanted to find out more, to understand her and the way that she was. That didn't explain half of what was going on with her, she had been charmed was that the right word the night before, she was open and honest, she was frank and clear, and her intelligence was intoxicating. Then this morning she was so easy to talk to to open up to, she had been having a girl talk conversation with Lex Luthor. Then in her drink infused conversation she had almost told her about the super friends. Asking her out had been for distraction, had been to get her off her track not that she thought that would hold someone like Lex back for long. However it had resulted in this perplexing situation. 

She had decided that she liked the idea of asking her out after the first spontaneous request, the thought of more time with her somewhat exciting. She had not accepted, but she invited Alex to go to a restaurant and eat with her. Did Lex ask her out in return? Was this a date of Lex’s request. How had things got so turned around, Alex found herself smiling as she sat there, regardless of what happened, she knew exactly where to find Lex, every morning at seven and now also on a Friday night, she had an invite to join her. She glanced at the window and noticed just how wide her smile was before seeing the sign for Luthor corp. She looked at her watch and she was late, great she thought, turning up late, looking like a hobo and smelling like a brewery. She sighed and stood exiting the café, Lex had complimented her and overlooked her distinct smell and look, she wasn't expecting the same kind of discretion from Lena. not only was she not looking forward to the meeting, she was late for, with Kara and Lena talking again she was likely to tell Kara, and then she would be worried. She rushed forward and headed into the building flashing a smile at the security and heading to the elevator.

Lena’s office (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:35………

Lena had watched Kara fly off and then stood on her balcony with her coffee watching the somewhat late display from the super flying through the city and over the buildings, reminding everyone there was hope, there was someone there watching over them, that they were not alone. She found herself smiling as she drank her coffee, it was the thing that she loved most about her morning routine, when her and Kara were not talking this at least gave her the feeling that she was not alone. She hadn't noticed the knock at the door. It wasn't until there was a cough that she turned to see Alex in her office, arms folded across her chest, looking at her with a raised brow. Lena sighed, that was not unexpected but she was hoping that the morning wouldn't start off with confrontation. She moved into the office and motioned towards the breakfast laid out by Kara.

“Welcome Alex”

Alex knew going in hostile wasn't the best option for the meeting, especially when she was already late, but when there was no answer she let herself in, and with a thought that maybe if Lena was up to something she would catch her. As she stepped into the room and closed her arms across her chest she saw the woman on the balcony, there was that strange feeling again, something was off, it wasn't uncomfortable or pleasant. Maggie had felt out of place a little, but she had put that down to the years and then well things seemed pretty normal after that, Lex had been a pleasant feeling like the world came back into focus. Lena though, there wasn't much new information when she looked at her most things seemed to be the same, except an extra layer of hurt, not expected. Her Lex had been taken from her, had been thought dead, another very hard to take lie that had befell the youngest Luthor. She coughed to announce her presence and pull the woman from her thoughts. She wasn't sure what she was thinking but she had looked peaceful until she turned to look at Alex. she looked at what Lena was motioning too and then felt a pang of guilt, Lena had been trying to make this a little less unpleasant, she shook it off and ran her hand through her hair.

“Sorry I am late, I got a little side tracked and ended up meeting up with someone in the café that was unexpected. I wasn't planning on stopping but well when Lex invited me to stop I did, and I got a little behind.”

Lena brow raised, she was not expecting that Alex had eaten breakfast with Lexi, that was a very off routine for Lexi she hoped that Alex had not upset her. She had been doing well since the last treatment and she wanted the next treatment to come from her, not their mother, she hoped that she had not been pushed so far that she would have to see her mother again before Lena was ready. She also knew that Alex didn't like her or Lexi, and with the previous Lex she could understand that, but her Lexi was different and precious. She could handle herself of course but Lena was very protective of her, she didn't want to lose her again and she wouldn't let Alex go after her. She wanted to protect Kara but she wouldn't do so at the expense of Lex, if Alex was going after Lex she wouldn't allow that.

“You had breakfast with my sister? That doesn't sound like something that you or her would have been expecting. She isn't doing anything that you need to watch Alex, you probably don't believe it but Lex is not what people make her out to be”

Alex tilted her head and looked at the younger Luthor, was she just as protective and passionate about Lex as the older Luthor was of her, it was a curiosity how after so long she was seeing this, the same kind of love and devotion that she and Kara shared within the Luthors. After all they had a life that was not exactly your everyday American dream. Maybe the kind of closeness was fostered through adversity, her and Kara had been a rocky start, Kara grieving and Alex being a bit of a brat, but they came through it stronger. She couldn't help but wonder how strong the connection must be between the Luthors uniting against the horrible parents that they had. Alex could feel herself softening a little, why was it that she was struggling to hold on to her anger when it came to the Luthors.

“I have no idea what she is doing, it was a little unexpected, after all I quit last night and have spent more time with Lex in the past two days than I did the whole time I was working for her. You know well enough that any threat to Kara I take seriously and will not just stand by and watch someone hurt her, although Lex doesn't seem to want to, I dare say that her only interest seems to be keeping Kara safe for you, shame she couldn't keep her safe from you.”

Lena listened to what Alex had to say, clearly her charming sister had worked some magic on the stone faced Danvers girl, she wouldn't be surprised, Lexi was an amazing woman and all the differences that she had were endearing in a way, she was different and exciting. She heard the threat that was in there, that anything that she thought would hurt Kara wouldn't be ignored, she knew that Lex was always interested in the properties of Kryptonite, but not to hurt the supers, the whole fight with superman had been an accident that Dam AI protecting itself. The sting from Alex’s last statement hit hard, Lena had done things that were not good, she had been hurt and she reacted poorly but that was something for her and Kara to work through. Not Alex.

“My sister is a curious person without intention, she never created for a reason beyond her curious nature, I can assure you that nothing she is doing will be intended to hurt anyone. She is not what you think, she is not a monster, she is different and people dont understand that, I will not allow her to be brought to the brink by you, she has had enough people controlling her, hurting her, she deserves a chance to be left alone, allowed to take what enjoyment that she can. As for me, you know that I regret what I did, that I have tried to make up for it in as many ways possible and it is not you that I have to apologize to, and I am not going to Alex, if you think that you are going to come in here and attack me and I am going to break down and apologize again you will leave in frustration and rather quickly. Things between Kara and I are just that, between us.”

Lena had not wanted things to go this way she hadn't wanted to start with more animosity but it seemed like there were still many things that Alex was holding on to. She wanted to work with her, to help create a place for Kara to go that wasn't part of the government, but it seemed that it would not be the easiest partnership. If Alex didn't want to be on board with this, then she would have to rethink a few things, Kara’s safety and being away from the DEO was her top priority, she had no idea what the other Lex had put in place for her.

“Look Alex, you don't trust me and I get it, but on this one thing we agreed, Kara needs to get away from the DEO and she needs support, I have offered to help with that and Kara has agreed to that, she wants you on board and so do I. I don't expect you to forgive me or forget what happened, but I would expect some civility when working on a common goal.”

Alex was a little surprised, not that Lena had bite, she knew she did, she had seen the darker side of the younger Luthor on more than one occasion. Her defense of Lex was passionate as her defense of her relationship with Kara, Alex was curious about that. She said relationship not friendship was something more happening here than she knew. She had of course known that the two of them had teetered on the edge of more than friends not that either would admit it, Kara loved Lena and she could see Lena loved her but they had not moved that forward. Has something changed? The information about Lex was also interesting, the things she had noted about Lex had been to a degree confirmed by Lena, she tilted her head and raised a brow. Not for the first time today did she wish that she had not drunk so much. After all she was getting all kinds of information she needed to process and her mind was not at full speed.

“Whatever is between you is between you, and no I am not going to forget, and as for forgiveness that's Kara’s thing not mine. If you go after her again, if you hurt her again, let's just say this time nothing will stop me making you disappear, with or without the DEO I have the ability, knowledge and the skill to make that happen. However protecting Kara is my first priority, and you have provided a way to do that, I can make sure she is supported and that no one is out to hurt her, so civility I can manage.”

Lena listened to what Alex said, was that a shovel talk? Did Alex think that her and Kara were more than friends? She had been thinking about this herself, the kindness that Kara had been showing eagerness, she had thought about that, she had wondered but put it down to her own selfish hopes. Although the second part gave her a small amount of hope that Alex would at least be on board with the super friends team, and she would bring a lot to the table. She thought about it for a moment and sat down picking up a Irish scone and preparing it, she was not going to let this go to waste and she needed something to do for a moment while she gathered her thoughts, she motioned for Alex to sit and watched as she lowered her arms and took a seat. She had also taken a coffee from the table. Lena took a breath and looked at Alex capturing the chocolate orbs with her own, hoping that her statement would be seen for what it was. Honest and transparent, she was not trying to hide anything she wanted this to work for Kara.

“Look Alex, I know that you're not happy with my involvement, so I have made some discrete enquiries and have a couple of other investors that want to help. You know them both and I think that it might help. Cat Grant and Kate Kane have both put up money to get the project running, Kate has also supplied some tech already designed for the use of the agents. The money from the supergirl merchandise is being rerouted to an investment portfolio to help pay for residual collateral damage. No hero stands alone, Batman has side kicks, Superman is part of a league and Kara deserves a team around her that can watch her back. No hero should stand alone, it's a lonely job that she does through love for this city and the world. She deserves the best back up she can get. She has Nia and brainy, and most importantly she has you. All I am doing is creating a place you can work from and tools to keep the less invulnerable safe, you may not believe it but I care about her.”

Alex drank her coffee and sat a little more relaxed as she observed the woman making something to eat, she wondered if this was a stall for some time, a chance to calm, Alex knew she needed some, and for her silence was never an issue. She waited until Lena looked at her and then the way she did caught Alex off guard. She had been used to the CEO mask, the façade that she wore to protect herself. This was different, when Lena’s emerald orbs fixed on hers she could see so much in them, pain, fear, vulnerability, sadness, hope, sorrow, love she had never seen this level of emotion on the youngest Luthor's face before. Alex wondered if something in her had shifted, if something in Lena had, she felt the remainder of her anger fizzle out as she spoke. She was right, other heroes had partners, people to have their back and make sure that some of the weight was shared, Kara had the weight of the world on hers, she had taken out the crisis with help and they had all lost so much Kara shouldered it all. Then she went after leviathan and she had managed to stop yet another catastrophe. Kara was alone a lot, not just being one of the last Kryptonian's, not because she was drifting in space for so long. No this was more than that, it was the crippling isolation of someone who holds the burden of the world, that takes everything on themselves to protect everyone else.

“I can't disagree with that, others have always had support, Kara had the DEO and me, but it isn't safe, the others helping means more support for Kara and more options. I have a number of agents in mind that would be an asset too, although I am not sure how much time they can offer as vigilante teams don't pay enough and there is not medical and things. I am going to need to get something too, but I need something flexible.”

The change in Alex sent Lena through a loop, she was talking about this like she was really on board, like she would be working with her, to help her had people in mind and everything. Lena took a moment to hide her shock. She wasn't sure about all the people having a salary but when they had spoken about funding they had put the money aside and in a fund, they had allocated a fund for the building, the tech, ongoing funding for replacements and utilities. They had also put money aside for a staff, a small team of maybe six, the money that would be coming in would be from investments, the money flow would be difficult although the items created could be used to sell to the government too, only defensive items though she didn't want anything getting out that could cause harm. However all of the investors knew that this would be a loss, the project wasn't for making money it was for protecting a hero. She took the pad that was sat next to her and opened it up, getting the information that she needed on screen.

“This is the location and the layout of the base, there is a significant amount of work to be done but with Kara, Dreamer and Brainy working on it, there shouldn't be much of a delay, the computer components have been started within Luthor corp as per the specifications set out by Brainy and there are a number of other things already started. The location isn't as central as the DEO but it is close enough, the money has been allocated for a number of workers that we can have but the incoming money is only through investment, although there is a possibility of selling some tech to subsidies.”

Alex took the pad, the design and specifications were amazing Lena had shown her intelligence and understanding, there was a sunroom, not just land, a room that literally was infusible with yellow sun radiation, it was laid out for practicalities of medical need and for comfort for Kara as she recovered. There were medical bays for the agents, the tech looked state of the art. The control system and computer spec’s were beyond the DEO. Although there was a containment area it was smaller, most people being dropped to the authorities. The training area is equipped with red sun options to dampen Kara without pain. She looked at the figures for salaries and Lena had been over generous, and there was a health package, each person would be assigned a position in Luthor corp that was essentially a fabrication. She was in awe of the level of planning that Lena had already done. She flicked over and there were suits and tech, her eyes widened as she looked at the futuristic suits, and then back at Lena.

“This is amazing, are the suits possible? The wages for the positions are about twice the salary at the DEO that could be lowered to have additional positions, who is going to head up the medical team?”

With that the conversation flowed, easily with excitement and plans, options and Ideas. Both women bounced ideas around until there were names penned in for all the positions, there were now ten instead of six, there were additions to the base and ideas for transport and additional weaponry, defense plus a place to store food. Lena had had an idea about super energy bars that would deliver the kind of calories that Kara needed. They seemed to find a common goal that allowed them to put aside personal feelings and thoughts, Alex had also completely forgot about talking to Lena about Lex and if she could talk to her about it, she was so engrossed in the possibilities. Alex said that she would take a position if there was one left after trying to get a good team together, if she could have ten agents that were trained and already knew what was needed then they would be able to have two teams of 4 each day with two people off, meaning that including Nia, her and Brainy when they were available Kara should have a team of five with her at all times. 

Alex had left shortly after nine and there were a lot of things that had been planned, still more to do, however Lena thought that was a much better start than she thought possible. She couldn't help but smile, maybe this would work, she could look at a salary for Alex too maybe, although she wasn't sure that Alex would take a job from her, she would probably laugh at the thought of working for Lena, things were better but it wasn't a relationship she wanted to push too far to soon. She had meetings and work through the whole day from now on and the only saving grace was the thought that Kara may be able to work with her in the lab again that night. She would be able to tell her about the progress. Maybe if the energy cells worked based on Kara’s physiology they could use that to subsidize the project, anything that Kara helped develop could be split that way, it was definitely a thought to take forward.


	14. Lex’s confusion

Lex’s Lab (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:40………

Lex had rushed from the café, and headed to the car, she used an alternative route to the lab and ensured that all the security was back up after she entered, she didn't want Alex to have followed her and didn't want anyone knowing where she was without interrupting her. All the time in the sanitarium had given her time to think and devise the formulas needed to create the different forms of Kryptonite, and having her own lab where she was working she had the space to create them. She had two new ones to test today. They should be finished and she was very eager to find out what they did. A stray thought went to Alex and what she would think of this, of her experiments, she seemed to have moved from the position that Lex was some kind of monster but she couldn't help wonder if this would swing the vote back in the other direction. Alex was a complication in her life, she knew it and she should stay away, but there was something about the older Danvers girl that called to her.

She had completed the tests on the first rock, a deep purple in color the information was logged and added to the ones already complete, just waiting for the scan from inside the containment unit. She had been working a few hours, it took time to collate the information and look at the differences between the cells and hair the different options she had. The main considerations were human and kryptonian, but she also tested against plant life and other extraterrestrials where she had samples. After all she wouldn't want to increase the ability of any alien life form, there were already two that were practically invulnerable. It must be nice to have someone you care about like that, someone that can't be hurt or easily, you know that they will always be there, she thought how Alex had been looking to protect her so fiercely, the Kryptonite was her one weakness, she wondered for a moment if that was why she was being so hard on Lena, because she showed her that her sister could be taken away. Lex’s own mortality never really bothered her but the thought of going on without Lena there was something that she didn't want to think about, she lived it and it broke her. She recognized the same in Alex.

Lex took out the second sample and collected samples of hair and blood. She had very little left and she wasn't sure there was going to be a way to get more at the moment, especially not without drawing attention to her. She placed the blood sample of the kryptonian over the sample of the kryptonite. It was a rose pink in color, she thought the likelihood was that with the color there would be no interaction on the cellular or physical level but she was meticulous in her experiments. Placing the slide under the microscope she couldn't see any differential to the main sample on file. It appeared to have no effect she wasn't expecting it too but since meeting Alex she had come to realize that not everything fit in her equations, inconsistent variables and all just filtering into her life. There she was again Alex popping into her mind. How was this happening, she didn't normally get distracted so easily. Part of her condition was a single minded fixation and that obsessional behavior had been securely fixated on the kryptonite for a very long while. Even the thought of finding the missing elements so she could create the other forms had taken a back seat. She had worked out their formula that was as far as it got. However as inconceivable as it was a woman, a Danvers woman was popping into her mind.

Lex took a sample of human blood and held it over the new rock, wondering if this was one of the few that affected humans, was her split attention caused by the rock sitting on the workbench? She had never been distracted by a woman, she had been obsessed with one once, a long time ago but that was different this was like a distraction, a curiosity that kept circling back. Was she under the effects of the kryptonite? She looked at the sample of blood and there was no alteration to human blood either so not a cellular change, she switched to a hair sample to look for a physical change, and again she came up with nothing, the only options were emotional or mental changed, but it was almost impossible to really understand those especially for her. She couldn't help but think that she could do with someone else working with her, someone who understood the kryptonite and the alien physiology. Her mind drifted to Alex again, and how well that she would fit that roll, not to mention she had some kind of moral compass and ethical code that would ensure that Lex didn't have something that would later cause her a problem, leave her in the hands of the government or in the sanatorium again. Her progress was definitely slow today her thoughts split like this.

She decided that this sample having no physical or cellular impact on either the Kryptonian samples or humans would put it away and neutralize its effects, that way if it was the rock causing this unexpected indistinct intrusion into her mind. She checked the table to collect the correct counter measure and put the pink rock away, she pulled out a green sample, not the dark green but a lighter one to account for the different vibration and visual spectrum. She held the rock for a moment or two to ensure that the pink was neutralized. She put the green away and started the scan of the pink she had put in containment, she wanted to check it was stable also it was important to her to have a complete analysis of the radiation expulsion of the rock, some of them had a much larger field. She wanted to ensure that she was not going to be under the effects of any of them when she worked. Alex would appreciate the lengths she took to ensure that there was no residual radiation leaking from the rocks, she would be happy that Lex even if she thought the dangers were different in importance, she was ensuring they were neutralized. Still in her mind, even though the rock was neutralized. Lex couldn't understand this, maybe she was in need of a treatment, although other than Alex’s intermittent appearance in her mind she felt fine.

Unable to focus on work Lex decided she may as well try to piece together why this woman was causing this in her. She sat down and crossed her legs, loosely resting her hands on her lap. Alex Danvers, she was inconsistent, she was someone that couldn't be anticipated with ease, she was skilled, intelligent, easy to spend time with, for the most part anyway, she didn't need to fill every silence. She knew she was passionate and she loved her sister as much as she loved Lena and she seemed to be giving her a chance as a person not as a predetermined monster. She realized that she didn't know that much about her, not the real her, she knew her file obviously but not the woman behind it. She couldn't understand why she was dwelling, human interactions, people in general held little interest in her, the mediocre minds in the city hardly gave enough stimulation for a passing thought but Alex seemed to get not just one, but more and more frequently in her mind. She had started to become unstable a couple of times when in the company of Alex that in and of itself should have had her distancing herself, but she could control it, she was learning to manage her own symptoms without treatments, something that she thought she would never be able to do. Was that it? Was it the way that the woman seemed to be able to create a situation that she could overcome? 

Lex heard her phone ring and she looked over, it was her mother, that couldn't be good, she had not done anything that would be considered off balance, why would her mother be calling her? Whatever it was she was sure that this would not be in her best interest. As much as her mother in her own way loved both her and Lena it wasn't love, not that Lex particularly understood love, but she was sure it wasn't an extension of one’s own ego. It wasn't given with a price, not with condition, well that is what she was led to believe, and the way Lena loved her she could see what she meant. Alex had said she loved this Maggie woman but they had different views of the future so they had split up. She wondered what kind of love that was. Lena had once said if you love someone enough you should let them go, that the love isn't conditional on them being with you. She couldn't help but wonder if Alex loved Maggie like this or if there was a condition, something about the future that was a condition for Alex that Maggie didn't meet. She realized the phone had stopped ringing and frowned, her mother had left a message.

“Alexandra what are you doing? You should be at the DEO I am here waiting, and those impetus men in black will not let me in without you being here, you know how I hate being kept waiting. This is most objectionable, Alexandra I am being held at the gate like a common criminal, not the mother of the woman in charge of this pathetic little government compound.”

DEO (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 15:20………

Lex closed down the lab quickly and headed to the waiting town car. She wasn't aware of any meeting or why her mother would be there now. She felt the familiar feeling wash over her body, she had come to associate the tightening of her stomach, the nervous twitch of her hands, the increase in heart rate and breathing as a form of anxiety. She always felt like this when there was an unexpected thing happening in her life, a change that she did not expect. Her mother was always doing this changing things, after all she changed the entire world, and dumped her here, and hadn't even bothered to see if she was doing well. The only time she had seen her mother was for the treatment shortly after arriving and that was like everything else clinical. They took the fastest route to the DEO and Lex started tapping out the numbers on her fingers, twin primes something to help steady this increasing pace her heart was insistent on achieving. She stepped out of the car and moved towards her mother.

“Mother hello, what a pleasant surprise.”

She leaned in and kissed her cheek as was customary and then looked at the agent to let them through, she was not happy to be here. She had planned on a full day in the lab just coming in this evening before dinner to show her face. The guards opened the door and they entered the elevator heading up to her office. Once inside Lex ran through the things she needed to do.

“How are you mother, can I get you a drink, won’t you have a seat”

Lillian smiled appreciatively if not somewhat sardonically as always and placed her coat and bag on one of the chairs before sitting down, she was assessing Alexandra as always, she had greeted her appropriately, she had remembered to ask after her health, offer a drink and a seat, etiquette rules all in place as per her training. She was dressed well although the shirt was last season, it was still quite in vogue, the pumps a sensible size practical and fashionable. Her hair was a little long, but still styled well, makeup was minimal and perfect with a Smokey eye, it complimented the charcoal skirt and blazer. She had managed eye contact and was not fidgeting. All in all she had managed to present herself well, Lillian was pleased, Lex was her greatest achievement and her most profound success. After all she was a genius, was able to create and invent things, she was holding the position, and was more powerful than Lillian could have ever imagined. As an extension of her own persona Lex was the superior Luthor, and she was hers. Her concern that Lex would have needed treatment before now seemed unfounded, she was managing well.

“I am good thank you, the project is being run more legitimately now, and there are many more things that this version of the world can offer. Although I am still not able to remove all the aliens, Lena appears to be flourishing in her position at Luthor Corp although I am still not sure why you would give her such a position, she hasn't previously shown that she was capable of it”

Lex hated that, she knew full well, just as precisely as Lex herself, that Lena had not only run Luthor Corp in their reality as she did in this one. After all she had managed to change the name, and direction of the company even with Lillian herself actively trying to stop her. Why did she always have to be so derogatory about Lena, she was brilliant in her own right and Lillian never gave her any credit for that. It didn't seem to matter what Lena achieved there was always someone there waiting in the wings to remind her she is inconsequential in the greater scheme of the world. More often than not it was their mother, someone who was supposed to love her unconditionally. Not that Lex thought that Lillian was capable of that, she knew little of emotional content, and all she did know was taught to her by Lena much to Lillian's revolution.

“Mother, I may have been in a sanitarium, and well he may have been imprisoned but in both realities, Lena was the one in control of Luthor Corp, it is her rightful place. You know I have little interest in the company or the DEO but I am playing my part here, and Lena is taking care of the other. You have what you wanted, the Luthor empire is in control and you have taken your position heading your own project. Lena is doing a good job where she is, and while she is there busy she isn't getting in your way. I thought you would be happy with the turn of events, after all you orchestrated them yourself.”

Lillian listened to her, she structured the argument fairly well, she was in control of her faculties, she was able to recognize the difference in the time lines and manage them without obvious signs of distress. Although she couldn't find it in her to agree that Lena had a rightful place in the Luthor dynasty she did love her in her own way, not like she loved Lex, after all Lex was her creation. Her greatest triumph over her tedious and uninspiring husband. He had thought Lex defective and Lena superior, she had shown him that his unexceptional and rather pedestrian mind was just unable to comprehend the genius before him. Like most men with fragile ego’s her husband had not been able to contemplate the vast expansive intellect of their daughter, but then a lesser mind than hers which he was would never see the truth before his eyes, he just didn't have the intelligence to comprehend the depth within the mute child. The depth she circumvented and pulled forth the Alexandra. She had clearly managed to find the perfect balance in the treatments, to counter the damage done to her beautiful girl, once again her triumph was clear. Alexandra was again stable, and she was brilliant.

“As you wish Alexandra, she is here for you at your request, she is your responsibility, now, I was not here just for a family moment, I have some priority reports and contracts for you, I was in Washington and these were to come to you. It is my understanding that other orders will be with you within a week but these were top priority and needed implementing immediately.”

Lex took the files and placed them on her desk, she could see by the classifications on the side that both applied to Supergirl, she raised her brow and looked at the folders moving away to get her mothers drink, she had not specified so she was most likely testing her memory, she went to the small fridge and pulled out a bottle of chilled Domaine Coche-Dury Charlemange Grand Cru 1996. She poured a glass for her, it was early afternoon, so acceptable not time yet for scotch, not the right atmosphere for tea or coffee. She handed the glass to her mother with a small half smile.

“I will have them returned tomorrow Mother, this afternoon, I have to talk to the new recruits and go through the expectations. I also have to fill a request for a new Deputy, Alex Danvers decided that she no longer wanted to work here”

She watched Lillian smile, her mother would revel in that, she knew, one less person standing in the way of what was happening, one less person watching Kara’s back, little did she know that she had just been traded for Lena, and nothing in those files would be signed without her approval. She sat and took a sip of her own wine.

“Well I can't say that I am surprised Alex Danvers is a unruly woman, she shows a complete lack of respect and decorum, the loss of that particular woman is not something to worry about, I am sure that there are others that can fill the role, someone who is not interested in bringing down the whole family. Not that you should be worried, the woman is practically a Neanderthal, she is all brawn and no brain, she is only a threat to those slower than herself, so no threat at all really.”

Lex’s body reacted immediately to that statement, her heart quickened, she felt hot, gone was the twisting in her stomach, there was a squeeze on her heart, her muscles felt primed and ready to attack, like there was a treat. She found it disagreeable and unproductive when she was flooded with emotion, especially when it happened quickly and came from nowhere, her mind was running over everything her mother had said and the feeling was intensifying. She tried to think, tried to understand, her cognitive function impaired by the flood of endorphins and other chemicals. She didn't understand emotion, she didn't need them, what was the point of having them, she needed a user manual. She recognized the symptoms, they were similar to when Lillian went after Lena, anger, she was angry, but why? She only got angry when it was connected to someone important, Lena, Clark in the past, and one or two others, but this was Alex, she had spent only two meetings with the woman, how could she care about her. She forced down the feelings in her body trying to overcome the fog in her mind.

“Well she needs to be replaced by someone that can do the job and that as you know is a tiresome task. I must get on with this now mother, as I said I have to meet with the recruits. Normally Alex would have done this but without her I have to. Dealing with the pedestrian thoughts and perceptions of these grunts is always tiresome.”

Lex wondered if there was something more here, had she come to rely on Alex at the DEO? Had she somehow become important to Lex having time away from this, from dealing with the life she had not chosen? She had not registered her mother moving and gathering her stuff until she was laying her hands on her shoulders and kissing her cheek.

“Of course my beautiful girl, go be brilliant.”


	15. Love, Zhao

Luthor Corp (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 19:00………

It had just passed sunset when Lena was finally done with all her paperwork and emails for the day. The meetings had generated more work than she wanted, she really just wanted to be finished so she could be ready in case Kara arrived. She walked to the closet at the far end of the office and pressed her thumb to the pad on the wall and it slid to the right effortlessly. The Luthor always had to be prepared for anything, so it was wise to keep some belongings in her office. The brunette slipped into something a bit more comfortable. As she changed she glimpsed into the long dressing mirror in her undergarments, normally she wouldn't dwell her body always a source of ridicule for her mother: but today she paused and wondered if a certain someone would ever find her attractive. In Lena’s own eyes, on a good day, she considered herself beautiful and powerful, but when one considered the beauty and power of a Kryptonian, she was hardly a match. Kara was a goddess and Lena was human, with insecurities and imperfections. Shaking her thoughts away, she dressed and headed toward her lab, refusing to let the previous thoughts re-enter her mind. The CEO got busy by storing away equipment they wouldn’t need so they’d have plenty of space for what they did need. Before long, Kara’s voice filled the silence, she had made it, Lena’s heart skipped as she turned.

At the end of the working day she patrolled, she didn't really want to. It was the first time that she had felt that way in a long time, if Alex had been at the DEO she would have called off. Thankfully there was a little trouble here and there but nothing major and nothing that would keep her from Lena. She made a quick trip to France, gathering pastries and then to Italy for some pasta, her last stop was a small shop just around the corner to LCorp to pick up a salad too. Lena always had something healthy. She felt her heart pounding as she reached the door, her excitement to see Lena, bubbling up. She got to security and was greeted with a smile before being informed of Lena’s location. She headed to the lab, knowing the way not that it would have mattered, Kara could already hear the beating of Lena’s heart, she was not in the cube, it had been so concerning, she had panicked, not tonight, tonight she could hear the beats and her kryptonian heart beating in sync. She tapped the door and looked in with a bright smile. Lena had already replaced what she had destroyed the night before.

“Hey Lena , I am here”

“Hey, Not a bad night on patrol, I take it?”

Lena’s face erupted into a wide smile as she saw Kara enter. Kara smiled brightly as the CEO came into view, her comfy clothes were such a difference to her business wardrobe, somehow it made her look younger, softer and so beautiful. She was less guarded and more relaxed and Kara loved that. Who was she kidding she loved Lena in anything, she was strikingly beautiful, womanly, Kara sometimes wondered what she would look like with nothing on, if she would be able to handle the vision of Lena like that. She had once or twice thought of taking a peek but she couldn't do that; it was wrong, and more than that disrespectful to the love that she felt for her. She tried to banish the thoughts, she was here as Lena’s friend. That's all Lena wanted from her.

“Yeah well there were a few things I cleared up quickly but nothing major, so I called it a night and picked up dinner, you ready to eat now or would you rather work first? You know I have been thinking all day about the little issue and I was wondering if we could make a synthetic plasma, a mix between my cells and chloroform to create like jell pack style batteries?”

She lifted her hands exposing the bags and shrugged with a bashful smile at all the bags she had. She was not feeding an army but that much flying did drain her a little; Lena was worth it though and she hoped she would like it. Showing Lena the food and her interest in the project hoping that Lena would see that she was willing to do whatever she chose.

The moment Kara raises the bags, Lena notices the blonde’s arms flex and with absolutely no permission at all, her mind went back to the thoughts from earlier; what Kara’s body must look like underneath her clothes. She needed to get a grip on her mind and repeat that she is her friend, she is her friend. The problem is the thought that she loved her kept sneaking in. Lena involuntarily took a very small step back and she was unable to get her brain refocused. Some distance maybe that would help, she tried her voice but there was nothing she swallowed and tried again.

“Y- yes. Let’s eat first.”

She tried to keep her hands busy by moving some equipment over so Kara could set the bags down. She needed to get her brain to work against what Kara had said about the project, the only way to counter the emotion was thought she knew it. Plasma? Cell batteries? She’s sure this would all make sense later but right now she couldn’t process the idea. Damn it she never mastered this, Lillian had tried over and over but she just couldn't master her emotions, she wasn't a robot, she often wondered if Lillian was on the spectrum or just a sociopath. 

“Yes, that’d be... a good place to start. So what did you bring us for dinner? It smells delicious.”

Kara notes the changes in Lena, elevated heart, stutter stepping back she wondered what she had done to worry her, had she moved too fast. She lowered her arms slowly and carried the bags towards the table, she smiled as she walked and tried to ensure she wasn’t using any super speed or anything.

“Salad, pasta and pastries a three course meal fit for a queen, and enough for a hungry Kryptonian”

She chuckled and put the bags down pulling Lena into a hug, burying her face in her hair and inhaling the scent of Lena. She always smelt amazing. She mumbled through the dark locks, she needed to keep focus but with Lena’s scent all around her she was struggling.

“I’m glad you like the idea, I thought it could really make a difference in sustainability, not to mention we can mimic the radiation so it would be able to use even in darker climates”

Lena was just about to peek at the salad in the bag when Kara enveloped her in a hug. Kara had relaxed into the hug loving the way that it made her feel, knowing in her own mind that there was something wrong about enjoying it like this when Lena didn’t realise what it was doing to her, she wondered how lena would react; knowing that when she help her like this her thoughts were of love and lust. Kara has to admit as much as she loved Lena there was a lust too, she wanted to be able to do more than hug her frame, she wanted to do more than feel her pressing against her. Almost as if she was reading her mind, Lena jolted back. Kara wondered if that was the reaction to how she felt if she was to be shunned if it ever came to light.

Her mind seemed to retreat further on contact, the emotions connected to Kara taking hold. What did IQ matter when she suddenly felt a solid warm body pressed into her? Then Kara continued to talk about solutions to the solar energy storage and she was done. Every single one of her nerve endings was crackling. She’d never felt anything like it and if she didn’t pull away, she didn’t know what else her body might do. This was ridiculous. She was ridiculous. The sight, smell, and touch of Kara Danvers was making her completely come undone. Lena wouldn’t have it. She stepped away, she needed to have distance she needed to converse, science was her thing, it was easy unemotional she needed to focus. She opened her mouth to speak, she managed, knowing how dull it sounded.

“Your Idea is amazing and could be revolutionary. It very well could change energy as we know it,” 

“Well that is true but that’s nothing new for Lena Luthor really”

Lena wished for some kind of internal fire extinguisher in the seconds that passed after their hug. This had not been how she saw this evening playing out. She smiled anyway though at Kara’s words. Lena was truly flattered that even after all the horrible things she’d done, the blonde still believed in her. She didn’t deserve this woman....

Kara laughed lightly, there wasn't anything that Lena had set out to achieve that was commonplace, and when there was a need it was Lena that came up with the thing that would change the tide, that would be able to change the world. Image inducers, helping aliens fit in, smaller ones correcting abnormalities and scars until something more permanent could be made, she gave people their lives back. Kara loved that about her, she never thought about anything on an individual scale when she could improve it for everyone. She bent over and started to unpack the different items from the bags and placed them on the table, one bowl of everything and some cutlery placed in a pile. Kara smiled and motioned to the seat.

“Come, sit, eat, You probably haven’t had anything since lunch if you remembered lunch”

Lena thought about it, Jess had brought her food in between meetings, had she eaten it she couldn't remember, she did remember the amazing breakfast, Kara had been spoiling her she looked at the food it looked amazing she had no idea where it came from, but with Kara it could be from anywhere. Her stomach rumbled and she blushed a little looking at Kara.

“This all looks so good where did you get it from, what is it we have?”

There was nothing about Lena that Kara wasn’t impressed by, she had shown herself to be creative, intelligent and always trying to do better make things better, even when they didn’t see eye to eye; Lena was the person trying to change things. She had enjoyed the hug; maybe she was being too tactile but there was nothing that she wanted more than to be holding Lena and showing her the love she had for her even if she couldn’t say it. She heard Lena’s stomach and chuckled lightly almost as if it was answering her personally. So she waited for Lena to sit and smiled.

“Well um, the salad is from the little place you like just down the road, the pasta is from the restaurant in the square by the leaning tower it’s fantastic and the pastries are from a small patisserie in Angouleme it’s amazing”

She blushed lightly as she took a plate and started eating, was she showing off? Treating her? Or just doing what she could for the woman who could have anything to make it special; she didn’t know what she knew was she would fly around the world a thousand time’s for Lena’s smile. Maybe it wasn't what normal friends did, but Kara was normal. She wasn't even human, surly there should be some perks for a friend when you can fly?

Lena looked at her and blinked a moment, she had the Salad in her hand and as Kara spoke the forkful of delightful greens was set back down as her shocked expression turned to Kara. Looking at the woman absentmindedly eating some pasta, trying to look all innocent.

“You’re joking. France? Italy? You went to France? You went to Italy Why?” 

She chuckled lightly as she spoke, shock amusement she wasn't sure really, she had now turned in her seat, fully facing Kara with raised brows. Her mind began to filter the possibilities as to why the blonde would have gone all that way for dinner. For her. The conclusion surprised her more than the conundrum itself. Was it possible that Kara might feel the same? That she cares about her more deeply than a friend might? Or was Lena reading too much into the gesture because she was consumed by everything about Kara? Lena had been fooled by a pair of glasses for years. She wasn’t about to let a hunch about this pass her by without an attempt at uncovering more. With a small burst of courage, Lena leaned into Kara’s personal space and reached over, delicately placing a single finger on Kara’s chin. She gently urged the blonde to slowly face her. The brunette wanted to look into her eyes when she asked her the next questions. She noted her voice although steady was quiet and a little hesitant.

“When was the last time you flew halfway around the world for Alex?” 

Kara’s heart instantly picked up as she felt the proximity change and Lena moved into her; it felt like the air was electrified and she could feel Lena’s energy pulsating around her. As her finger touched her face the warmth was registered immediately; the skin reacted to Lena’s touch, small wisps of energy running from the connection. She swallowed thickly at the softness, the intimacy of the moment. Lena’s question seemed heavy weighted, there was an opportunity to be completely honest and tell her that she loved her. How would Lena react to that? After the lies the separation everything would be the end of their friendship, would it remove Lena from her life, her cheeks were flushed and eyes wide she just felt like the world slowed and she couldn’t breath.

“Well I, um.... Alex is more of a pizza from Chicago girl really, um I am not sure?”

She bit her lip, the last time was probably the only time just after Jeremiah disappears, she was chastised for it greatly. She was told to hide her powers not do things to draw attention, since then it was more well….. Alex didn't want to take advantage, she didn't want to fly with her unless from the DEO or something, she figured the correlation was too painful for her too.

“I was always discouraged from doing anything with my powers, but I am out now and I, um well I wanted to do something nice for you, do you not like it? Is it just a reminder of who I am you don’t want? I didn’t want to upset you?”

Kara looked into Lena’s emerald orbs they were searching; boring into her, like Lena was looking into her soul. It was intense and intimate and Kara could barely breathe, she was terrified waiting for the brunette to speak. As strong as she was, as much as she had learned to call Lena out; stand up to her, Alex, the DEO everyone, she felt as though right now her whole world was spinning out of control and all her powers couldn’t stop it. Was this the moment that Lena would leave?

Lena moved her finger, replaced by a hand cupping Kara's face softly, the connected skin ignited and her lungs finally filled as she gasped. Lena was moving closer, she was moving into Kara’s space the emerald eyes she adored never leaving hers.

The CEO’s heart was pounding in her chest but she had to know if Kara felt the same way; if she longed for just a smile or touch every second of every day. She had thought that they would never be friends again and she was wrong, she thought Kara would never accept a substitute Lena, she had been wrong, she thought that Kara could never love her back, did she hope more than anything that she had this wrong, yes, god yes she did. As Lena looks into Kara’s eyes, she sees fear and vulnerability. The blonde could lift a fleet of planes yet the concern that the CEO felt in her tentative words seemed to scare her. Even after everything the brunette had done to drive the wedge between them before when she’d believed she was doing the right thing, Kara still wanted to make her happy. To be kind and make sure that Lena was taken care of. The fire of desire she’d felt earlier smoldered into the background and was instead replaced by a tidal wave of love. It washed over, wave after wave, and Lena took a chance. She leaned further into the blonde, holding her sapphire gaze, her hands coming up to gently cup her jaws and cheeks. The brunette leaned in until their lips were a breath apart.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

Lena paused, giving Kara a chance to pull away. When she didn’t, the CEO pressed her lips to Kara’s softly, kissing her and telling her all the things words could not.

She paused and thanked her, Kara thought she was going to kiss her but she thanked her, she wanted to surge forward and claim the lips, the succulent scarlet lips that were now so close she could almost feel them ghosting over her own. Then it happened and Lena kissed her, her eyes flitted closed as they connected and Kara’s heart exploded with joy, her hands reaching out to the CEO, tentatively resting on her waist and curling around pulling her in. When the kiss broke, Kara was flushed and breathless.

“Rao”

Lena had never realized she wasn’t alive until the moment Kara kissed her back. She’d simply been on some plane of existence, trying to make a name for herself and not to get killed every other week. Kara’s skin was, as always, warm to the touch and it radiated into Lena even more when she felt the blonde’s arms around her. It was heaven. She had taken the chance to kiss her for one moment and feel what it was like, after such a touching gesture she could be forgiven, it was chased. If Kara had rejected it she could have played it off as gratitude and a friend kiss, although it meant so much more to her. The CEO grinned at Kara’s only word, knowing what it meant. She had to agree with her whole heart.

“I’ve... been wanting to do that for longer than I realized,” 

Her mouth seemed to get away from her, there was no way that it could be written off now. She whispered the words, but Kara would have heard it. She closed her eyes once again and leaned her forehead against Kara’s. Repeating in her mind, please don't run please don't leave. Lena wasn’t sure what to say, or if she should even speak at all. In Kara’s arms, nothing else seemed to matter right now.

Lena kissing her was everything, she couldn’t stop the spread of the smile that was pulling at the corner of her lips, nor would she want to, she was quite surprised they were not floating. As Lena moved forward and placed her head on to hers she sighed softly and closed her arms around her a little more. Kara heard her say she wanted to do that for a long time and she couldn’t speak. She was afraid of what would come out if she opened her mouth. Her heart was vibrating, her mind was all consumed with Lena's body in her arms. If she opened her mouth now she could spill everything, even though it seems like Lena likes her back, a lot it was a first kiss, she could hardly say I love you, marry me, be mine forever and that was what was running through her mind.

“Zhao”

She whispered before Lena continued to speak. She heard the way Lena's heart was going and the way her voice was shaky. Kara tested her voice and spoke softly and slowly.

“I really missed you, it was horrible without you in my life and seeing you again, I felt whole, I don’t know how to explain”

She pulled back a little and slid her hand up Lena’s back to her neck and chin, smoothing her thumb over the strong jaw line.

“Can I kiss you again?”

“I know what you mean, Yes. The answer will always be yes,” 

Lena agrees about feeling whole again. Kara was soft and warm and inviting and everything Lena never realized she craved. As Kara’s hands drifted up to the brunette’s face, her own drifted down the blonde’s sides until they settled at her waist. 

Her hands gripped at the blonde’s sides, wanting her closer if it was even possible. Kara pulled Lena closer with her arm wrapped around her delicate waste and held her flush to her. It was soft and sweet then Lena pulled away Kara’s lips chasing her slowly not wanting to lose the connection, her heart whining as it started its own rhythm instead of following Lena's. When she licked her lip Kara realized why she had moved and licked her lips moving forward with parted lips, kissing Lena softly chased was already filling her with soft waves of warmth, the moment their tongues met Kara felt herself lift off the floor. She moved her hand from her face to hold her more securely as she stroked the Luthors tongue with her own Kara was in a state of euphoria the cumulative passion, need, desire and love that she felt for Lena was being poured into the kiss. The way it felt to finally kiss her made Kara tingle.

The soft whimper escaping the Luthors lips was the sweetest sound Kara had ever heard. She squeezed her a little tighter. She loved her so much she would do anything to hear soft noises of pleasure from her. Lena was too lost in Kara; too lost in her strong arms, her soft lips, the way their tongues danced. Her free hand came up behind Kara’s neck and grasped gently, wanting them to stay connected like this as long as possible. Lena’s insides were a fluttering mess. A soft whimper escaped her lips and her kisses grew more and more passionate. She had to eventually pull away to pull air into her lungs. It’s only then, when her eyes slowly open, that she realizes they are off the ground. Instinctively, her grip tightens around the Kryptonian.

“Kara...!”

When she finally pulled back the whimper came from Kara she didn’t want to stop but understood Lena had a need for oxygen. When she spoke Kara opened her eyes. Realizing that they had drifted up from the couch, Kara had not even realized that she had done that.

“I have you Lena, you’re safe”

She kissed her nose and lowered her to the ground. Placing her softly onto the couch to ensure that she was safe, before with a flush not entirely from embarrassment she looked up at Lena and spoke.

“My powers are attached to emotions, happiness and contentment can lift me up, I’m sorry I know you don’t like to fly”

Lena never doubted her safety when in Kara’s arms. Especially here, now. She had never felt so alive, so safe, so loved, it was just the shock, the unexpected happening, she had been sat enjoying the most amazing kiss of her life one moment the next she realizes she is floating somewhere near the ceiling.

“It’s not that I don’t,” she said with a slight grin. “...it’s just when we have, you’ve usually been saving me from some death threat or another.”

But she isn’t complaining about being held in such a strong hold. If anything, it fanned the embers of love and desire within her. Lena looked at her heroine, touched by the emotion on her features. The pad of her thumb ghosted over Kara’s bottom lip.

“Never let me go?” 

She said just above a whisper. Hopefully her meaning was received; that Lena couldn’t imagine her life without the Kryptonian and she wanted her to stay, always. It wasn't anything to do with fear of falling, it was too late for that, far too late to change course to do anything but be utterly in love with Kara.

Kara smiled and closed her eyes as she held her relishing in the moment. She had kissed Lena, she was sure that they felt the same and she couldn't have kissed her like that without meaning it. The thought of flying with Lena filled Kara's heart with joy, she loved to fly and she would love to share that with Lena.

“Really? So if I took you somewhere just us flying me holding you you would feel safe?” 

The thumb over her lip sent a shiver down her spine and she felt her stomach clench. Lena was her everything, now that she knew Lena liked her too, she would never let her go.

“You will always be here in my arms if I had my way Lena, I will never turn my back on you, Zhao. You if you are happy to be, I would like you to be my partner, romantically”

She blushed a little at the connotations behind her words but she would wait until Lena wanted to take the next step, after all once she gave herself to Lena it would be forever. She knew it was formal but that was the way it was on krypton, there would be a match and then a formal request to the head of house followed by a bonding. She loved Lena and wanted to do this the right way.

Lena would go anywhere with Kara. To the depths of Hell if it meant they’d be together. All this time, while Lena’s brain and heart had been oblivious about just how deeply she cared for the blonde, her soul had known. The brunette was bound to the Kryptonian long before she realized. She grinned at the request, so very sweet, so proper, and just so adorable.

“Yes, I’d feel safe, I would fly with you, I’ll be your anything if it means I get to see you everyday, but tell me what’s Zhao? You mentioned it earlier too.”

Lena smiled and replied with another light kiss to the blonde’s lips. She was so happy she wasn't sure that there would ever be a moment of pure happiness like this in her life, and now that she had one, she hoped there would be more, and with Kara that hope was alive and well.

Kara’s heart soared at Lena’s response: she had always wanted to share her love with someone special, the sights that were afforded only her and Kal, Lena would love them. She smiled so wide that she could feel the corners of her eyes crinkling at the pressure. She didn’t think it was possible to smile wider until Lena’s next response. It filled her heart so much that as the smile stretched still further she lifted up and turned them slowly rotating. Lena kissing her softly again. She blushed dark pink, Lena had heard the word twice and pronounced it perfectly, she would love to teach her but this word, oh Rao.

“It is the um.. well we have words that encapsulated feelings and ideas and that is love, but it signifies a love for someone romantically it’s only used between bonded people”

Kara blushing was something Lena always found adorable. The way her eyes fell and a shimmer of panic flashed in them as she looked away. It was endearing and a stark contrast to the confidence of Supergirl. Lena’s brow raised in question but also playfulness. 

“Does it now?”

She couldn't help but tease her as her heart seemed to double in size, bonded that sounded like a forever thing, and that only made Lena happier. The CEO would have to make time to study the language of Krypton so she could share moments with her where the meaning was only between them. The thought turned her on a little.

“Forces of every kind have tried to keep us apart, and only today did I realize that our hearts and souls knew better. I’m not going a n y w h e r e, Kara Danvers. Zhao.”

Damn it that the brow of Lena’s could convey so much with a tiny waver, she loved the way she could stoke fear into people with it but then the way she did it was playful and seductive. She swallowed hard and nodded wondering if Lena knew what that meant to Kara, if Lena truly understood the depth of her feelings. Hearing the word again from Lena's lips was amazing. She pulled her closer again and she could feel Lena’s chest rise and fall the heart inside.

“I never left you Lena, in my heart there was always you, no matter what happened or what you did, my heart was loyal”

Lena’s heart melted at Kara’s words. She seemed to be so much better at expressing love than the brunette could. She wasn’t sure where to go from here. Was it as easy as telling each other how they felt? Were there things to discuss? Expectations? Fears? Or had they been so raw with emotion in the last weeks and months that they could read each without trying? Rather than let her mind overthink, she simply looked at the food beside them then back at Kara.

“What happens now? Do we finish... our date? Our lab work? Or...”

Kara was sure that Lena felt more than just liking her, she felt like there was a good chance Lena meant Zhao as it was intended she smiled brightly.

“Well you still need to eat, and we were going to revolutionize power cells, and we haven’t really decided what is happening with us”

She smiled and lowered her so that she could sit on the couch although her arms didn’t want to let go, her body really had a mind of it’s own at times.

“How about we sit and eat our food and talk about where we are comfortable taking this, I mean I know I am all in if you want me”


	16. Nothing is constant but change itself.

DEO (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 19:00………

Lex had been stuck at the DEO all day since meeting with her mother, she didn't want to be there, it was just of little interest to her and she couldn't wait to get out. She had gone and talked to the new recruits, she was with Vasquez, she was not a bad agent to be with, she said little and although she clearly didn't like her she wasn't overtly unpleasant to her. Although she did note that the normal neutral expression shifted when she looked at a Latino woman in the room. Lex noticed her glaring at her on more than one occasion. Although there was a little thought in her mind about why the two Latino women seemed to have an issue with each other, the thought passed quickly, once again the inner workings of the people around her had little to no interest for her. She gave her speech, watched the start of training, then was pulled away to a briefing. More and more demands on her over and over, every time she thought she could get away she was pulled back into something. Everyone needed direction and decisions about things that she had no interest in. She had finally got to her office, she was almost out.

She walked over to the bar and poured herself a few fingers of scotch and picked up the glass. The last time she was drinking scotch in this office it was with Alex Danvers, she had quit the DEO and Lex was feeling the fall out from that today. Alex never seemed to be overly stressed or bothered with the inane questions and constant need the agents had for input. She breezed through and commanded the place effortlessly. Oh she missed the woman, she had spent almost no time with her since she got pulled to this reality, and that was thanks to Alex, she really worked hard here and had the respect of the agents she would be hard to replace. Vasquez was the only one that she could see from the agents that would be able to start to fill the gap left by Alex. Brainy could run the place, he was a 12th Level intellect also, she enjoyed him. Someone who could actually understand everything she said and could calculate things as effortlessly. Although like her he didn't have the people skills needed to lead, not like Alex. She downed the fingers of the amber liquid allowing the warming feeling to take the forefront of her mind.

“So this is where you're hiding Luthor?”

Lex heard the tone of the words, that Luthor was nothing like the way Alex said it, that it was loaded with something other than respect and fondness, that was disdain, hate maybe even anger. She didn't recognize the voice and turned to appraise who it was that had the audacity to just walk into her office and speak to her that way. As she turned she recognized the woman as the Latino woman that Vasquez was glaring at earlier in the day, she was brash and brazen and clearly had no idea who she was dealing with. The shorter woman’s posture was designed to look superior, to intimidate but that was not going to work on her. Whatever it was that she had done to Vasquez to cause such dislike was clearly warranted.

“It is hardly hiding when I am standing in my office, in case you didn't notice it is my name on the door that you just opened without knocking and walked through without being invited. Clearly the recruitment team needs a new direction on the quality of new starters, you obviously missed the training in regards to the chain of command and the basic life skills required to maintain polite respect for your superiors. They are clearly scraping the bottom of the barrel with you, agent whatever your name is, although I do believe that there is little point in me learning it, you are not going to be here long with this attitude.”

“Sawyer, Maggie Sawyer, and I am not one of your agents, I am the police liaison for the NCPD, I am not under your jurisdiction Luthor, this maybe a link role but it is the police department that hold my contract, as for the chain of command, I have respect for it when the person in charge deserve it, just because you had some kind of presidential pardon does not negate the crimes you committed. As for hiding, you have avoided every meeting set thus far for us to discuss the role in respect to the DEO”

Maggie had no respect for the woman in front of her, she was in a position of power she didn't deserve and Alex had left because of her, she had taken her easy into Alex and that was more annoying than anything. She was more than happy to verbally spar with this woman, Alex had tried to take her on in the first meeting and she had closed her down. She would do the same with the Luthor woman, at least this woman wasn't the other Luthor, protected by supergirl. Maggie had to keep her feelings towards the super in check especially around Alex but she was someone who had no respect for what Maggie did. This Luthor however had no super powered protection.

Lex raised her brow, Maggie Sawyer, that name clicked into place in her mind, although Alex had not given the last name of the woman, she remembered looking at the file, a return to national city PD after many years away, previous work with the DEO, partnered with Alex herself on many cases, the Alien fight club, the Daxamite invasion. All information in the file she had read on Alex, there were too many converging factors to believe that this Maggie was anyone other than the Ex Alex had mentioned, it also explained the behavior of Vasquez, who was fiercely loyal to Alex. Lex could easily dispatch this annoying woman but how would Alex react to that, she seemed to be reconnecting with this woman and if she removed her reason for being here would that upset her, more to the point why did she care?

“You are correct in part with that assumption, the position is one of the NCPD however it is a conjoined working arrangement and you have to adhere to the policies and the demands of the DEO position as well. You will be evaluated as all new recruits and you will need to pass the testing, you will also have a dedicated superior here, your position was not question due to the previous work that you have done here, but if you don’t measure up the position will not become permanent, you may want to rethink your behavior and remember that there is a chain of command here, rules and expectations that you are currently falling short of.”

Maggie listened she was not impressed with Lex’s threat, she knew that there was a part of her position dependent on the continued working with in the DEO which had not been of any concern when it would have been Alex that she would have been working with; however she was not so sure that she would receive the same level of acceptance from others in the DEO. Being threatened immediately caused Maggie to go on the attack, she was not overawed with the way Lex thought she could intimidate her, Maggie was not someone that could be pushed around.

“Your idol threats may work on others Luthor but I have come up against your kind before and I am not easy to intimidate, your tests do not worry me, I have already proved myself capable, like it or not I am here to stay”

“I do not make idol threats Miss Sawyer, and your interpretation of my words are of little consequence to me, much like the rest of your abilities and posturing, you will be dealing with Vasquez as your supervisor, there is no need for you to be here, unless I specifically ask to see you, your presence is not needed. In addition the next meeting between us better be more in line with the positions we hold or the idol threats you believe me to be making will become a very stark reality”

Lex knew she was being a bit petty, knowing that Vasquez didn't like the woman, she wouldn't immediately terminate her contract. Even though she didn't understand why she cared about what Alex would think she did and she wouldn't just take the woman away from her. There was no need to make it easy for her to be here, and Vasquez seemed like the kind of person that wouldn't take it easy on her. Lex’s sardonic grin pulled at her lips as she called Vasquez into the office. She waited for her to arrive and looked to the other woman, before addressing Vasquez.

“I believe you know Miss Sawyer, she had found her way into my office, she had no need to be in here, and there is no need for her pass to have that level of access, as a liaison she has access to only the areas that are needed, I want her pass altered and her to begin the DEO training with the new recruits. Her access is to be restricted to that of a level 1 recruit and only increased as she passes through the program, no access to the containment, the labs, the offices command center, or the Armory, only to be changed as she completed the training. In addition Vasquez I want you to take point as her supervisor and the person in charge of her training and testing. Now if you will both excuse me”

Vasquez looked at Lex the sardonic grin, the way she was holding herself, she could tell that she didn't like Maggie any more than she did there was no obvious reasons that she wouldn't but that meant nothing to Vasquez, Lex had just given her carte blanche to finally beagle to teach that woman a lesson. Alex had loved her but the relationship was toxic and she didn't like the way it hurt Alex, she would be more than happy to kick her ass all over the training room. Maggie had previously had access to much more than a Level 1, Lex was being particularly brutal, it would mean that it would be a while before Maggie had any real input on anything, she liked the idea that Lex was knocking her down a peg or two. She wondered if Christmas had come early; it was clear in what Lex had not said that she wouldn't be particularly upset if she didn't make it through.

“Understood Miss Luthor this will be corrected immediately and I will schedule the necessary tests and training sessions. Detective Sawyer this way please”

Maggie glared at Lex, who the hell did she think she was, she looked at Vasquez as she entered the room and would be more than happy to wipe that shit eating grin off her face. She was more than pissed at being dismissed like this, and the alteration of her access would make it almost impossible to do her job, to say she was pissed was a understatement, she would deal with this and then drinks, maybe she should call Alex to entertain her after this day god knows she needed the work out, and maybe she could stay over and have Alex tend to her needs in the morning. She left the office with Vasquez slowly simmering away on the inside, someone would be on the receiving end of her frustrations today.

It was nearly eight when Lex looked at her watch, she had dispatched Maggie and collected the items for discussion with Lena the next day, she had missed her reservation, she normally ate at Chows on a Wednesday. The constant disruption to her routine was wearing on her as she could feel it, between her mother, Maggie, being stuck at the DEO and the constant intrusion from Alex Danvers in her thoughts, she was convinced that the latter was connected to the ambiguity over the request for dinner. Something else that was out of the norm, and very far from Lex’s experiences when it came to women. She wondered if she should order extra from Chows and go to see Lena, but she was having breakfast with her tomorrow. Her need to see her was moving from the desire to reconnect with her to the need for something to stabilize her, she could tell that as well as she was doing with things she was teetering on the edge. She had been able to pull it back but it was not safe for her to push it, especially as her mother's assessment was that she was doing well enough. It had to have been or she would not have left, any change that challenged her mother assessment would result in an investigation as to what caused the issue. She didn't want her mother looking into her life and her work. She headed out ordering her usual meal to be delivered and headed to the car to go home.

Lena’s Lab (National City) 15-03-2019 Earth Prime 20:00………

They had continued eating and Lena was taking a moment, the declaration from Kara was perfect, she was so elated to know that she was all in with her, it was complete, concrete and perfect. When things had been really good between them, before she found out about Kara, Lena could spot Kara across a crowded room and communicate with just one look. She missed that; knowing glances that were only meant for each other.

“Kara... I’m not an expert at relationships or showing love in a healthy way. I mean, I want to. I think I’m capable of it. But no matter how many missteps I might take, I’ll always be 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒊𝒏. With you. I mean it,”

Lena held the blonde’s gaze, relaying honesty with each word. she whispered, almost pleading. She wanted her to know that she was all in but that she also had insecurities and concerns, not about Kara, never about her but about Lena's own abilities, insecurities and propensity to make horrendous mistakes.

“...my life has no meaning without you in it. I’m comfortable taking this as far as you want to take it. Please, just be patient with me...”

Kara smiled softly. She didn’t like the distance since the kiss but the proximity to Lena was a little closer than it used to be. It was also a little closer than before she noted the change and this was nice, more intimate, not as intimate as kissing her but closer, she moved her hand to Lena’s hand and held it lightly wanting the additional connection. The dynamic had shifted and she felt like this was the start of something amazing. She smiled and flicked through her memories, all the things that her and Lena had been through all the times they had been able to show each other they cared.

“I disagree with you Lena, you showed a million times that you care, I just didn’t want to hope it was the way I did, I know the paragon of hope unable to hope for what she truly wanted seems strange but when ever I tried to have it all I lost things. Potstickers at a high class function? Handing me the salt without me asking? Creating a suit to stop kryptonite hurting me? Filling my office with flowers? Buying Catco? Always dropping everything to help even when you didn’t have to? The alien fight club finding the spaceship every time I came to you you showed me you cared”

She smiled wider, her azure orbs catching the emerald ones and reached over taking her other hand and brushing over her delicate wrist with her thumb. Softly caressing it to show that she was loved, adored and precious, on top of that she wanted Lena to know that her words were heartfelt and sincere.

“We can take it as slow as you want lena I am not going anywhere”

Lena’s memories of all the events Kara spoke up moved through her mind. And she was right; the CEO had done those things for Kara and their friends. Well, they’d been Lena’s friends too at the time. Perhaps, after taking this step with Kara, she could mend her friendships as well. If she was going to be with the Kryptonian until she took her last breath, she knew it would be important to the blonde that there be as little tension as possible with those she cared about.

“Okay then, Slow for now.”

The brunette placed her free hand atop Kara’s in her own and squeezed. She loved it when the kryptonian with all the power in the world at her fingertips was so soft, so careful, so tender it was almost as it everything that she did connecting to Lena was done with such attentiveness, it made her feel like she was the only person on the planet.

“Let’s enjoy this dinner that you put so much effort into getting, then we can work for a little, but it is already gone eight and we can disappoint national city, as much as I want to steal all your attention tonight, after that declaration, the people of national cry need to see their hero flying high at ten as always. Supergirl is the world's hero and I will always share her, but Kara you are my hero, my love and I will be selfish when it comes to you, I don't want to share you, so you may have to remind me that sometimes I have to share, because the most amazing woman in the world is also a superhero.” 

She said as she leaned in for one more soft kiss to Kara’s lips. The last coherent thought before the kiss stole the remaining brain function with its burning hunger that didn't stop at her lips was that she couldn't wait to tell Lexi in the morning that Kara loved her too. She may not have many friends but her sister was her best friend and now she was back Lena wanted to share everything with her.

When the kiss finally broke with the need for air, Kara looked at Lena lovingly and her face broke into a wide grin, her own lungs struggling a little to breath, she rested her head onto Lena’s for a moment and took a moment, just breathing in the woman she loved.

“You are worth waiting for Lena, and as for sharing, you may need to share my time at points but my heart belongs to you and you alone.”

Pulling back to look into Kara’s eyes, she placed her hand on the cheek of her beautiful Kryptonian, Lena’s thought drifted, the kiss had ignited the fire within her so furiously that she was struggling to think of anything other than having more of Kara, she knew that this was officially their first night as a couple, were they dating now? She wanted to be respectful and wait, to take things slowly but they had been close so long, lena had loved her so long, after three years their relationship seemed glacial, but in reality a hour or so was far too soon to be thinking about tearing the clothes of the blonde, to finally see what is beneath to touch caress and worship her in every way possible. That kiss, god that kiss had taken her mind to the gutter and she couldn't help but allow the thought, even as it caused a blush to creep over her neck and cheeks.

Kara notes the small blush and looked down smiling softly, she didn’t know what Lena was thinking about but if it made the Luthor blush then it must have been something extraordinary. She looked back at Lena and placed her hand on her cheek. She mirrored Lena’s position both claiming the others' faces in a soft embrace and an intimate almost all consuming gaze. She moved her thumb over the reddened skin as she spoke

“Will you tell me what you were thinking?”

“I was thinking... of y- you.”

Lena could feel the blush intensifying as she looked into those pool’s so cool so inviting, so open, lena didn't want to have a discussion about sex, not yet, not when they had barely shared a kiss or two. She wanted Kara to feel loved not like a piece of meat, not something that is to be possessed and devoured, oh shit her mind reeled over the thought, she would be more than happy to spend time devouring every inch of skin on the woman she loved.

Kara heard the elevation and looked up to Lena, her falter in her chewing suggested that she shouldn’t have asked it was private, she was just about to tell her it was ok that she didn’t need to answer. When Lena replied. Her heart jumped in her chest, the raven goddess was thinking of her and blushing, oh she wished she could read her mind understand what caused it, Lena so good at eliciting a blush from her early blushes herself.

“Oh, well then I won’t ask you to elaborate your thoughts about me are your own until you wish to share them”

They’d never broached the subject of sex in the years they’ve been friends. It’s a topic that simply hasn’t come up. So, Lena worries about saying anything further on the matter for now. Though if their kissing earlier was any indication, gods help her, the brunette would probably be a writhing mess in Kara’s arms. Eventually. Instead, she offers a blushing somewhat flirtatious smile and changes the subject.

“By the way, I almost forgot. I have a charity event on Saturday evening. I’m sure Catco has an invite as well... I was going to go alone, only long enough to mingle and make a donation. But, if you’re not busy, we could go together?”

“Oh another gala? This one isn’t to stop an evil plan is it? I’ll just be able to eat and dance and enjoy your company right?”

Kara’s mind wandered to thoughts of Lena in a beautiful gown and her being able to dance with her and hold her close, this time though there would be no need for her to be anxious about being too close. She could hold her, kiss her, everything about the thought made Kara’s body practically sing in excitement, if her life was one of her favored musical movies, this would be where she started singing a rousing longing and hauntingly reverent song of love and longing with the promise of satisfaction.

“It would be lovely, would it be an official date?”

Lena chuckled at Kara’s words. Of course those were her first thoughts; protecting people from evil wrongdoings and eating. How had it taken her so long to realize she loved this woman? She picked up the blonde’s hand and brought it to her lips, placing a light kiss to her knuckles.

“No, Kara. No evil plots, none that I know of anyway. The caterer is one of the best. You’ll love the food. Just in case we get too busy mingling though, I’ll buy you dinner beforehand. My treat,” 

Kara was about to open her mouth and say that it wouldn’t be necessary to do that, even with an evil plot nothing keeps her from food, and then she thought about it, Lena all to herself a romantic meal and then dancing, it was right out of a movie. Her body tingled at the thought she was finally going on a date with Lena. Her goofy smile showed just how happy that made her.

“That sounds amazing lena, what is the dress code for it? I would like to make sure I dress properly for our first date”

Lena picked up the desert that Kara had brought, she moans softly at the first bite of her dessert. She hasn’t meant to, but god it was delicious. The brunette was so comfortable with Kara in the moment that she offered her a spoonful of the desert fright from her own utensil, letting it hover in front of Kara’s lips.

“Well, you know the galas of those that want to flaunt their riches. Formal attire. I’ve already picked my gown, it’s a deep crimson. I was going to pick a black dress but it felt a little boring,” she added with a wink.

Kara’s mind almost shorted at the soft moan that escaped the CEO’s lips. She swallowed hard as her throat seemed thick, the sound was soft and almost primal, she wanted to hear it again, to be the reason for it. She blinked realizing that Lena was speaking, crimson oh Rao what was Lena doing to her, she would look unbelievable in that, she could almost picture it in her mind. As Lena moved the fork to her lips she opened her lips, captivated by the emerald orbs. The desert was good but having it fed to her by Lena made it so much better.

“Mmmm that’s so good”

She couldn’t couldn’t control the sensations in her body, the moan of the image and the way she fed her the taste of the desert was almost euphoric, Kara let out a little whimper. She had never experienced desire like this before, the moment that her love was allowed to be recognized it seemed to unleash a tsunami of thoughts and feelings like a breaking dam. Everything was heightened, everything felt more intense.

“Nothing you wear is ever boring, Lena every item of clothing is perfect on you, what should I wear?”

Lena did get quite a bit of satisfaction from Kara’s reaction. Playfulness aside, she was glad she wasn’t the only one who got weak in the knees. It was meant to be a sensuous yet silly moment, and all Lena could do was smile both inwardly and outward. 

“Well, I could always change my outfit if something were to sway my decision. What do 𝒚𝒐𝒖 feel like wearing? I could take us shopping day after tomorrow”

Kara nodded and smiled at her, another day of time with Lena she was getting more than she ever allowed her heart to dream for. They had a shopping date Friday, a gala Saturday and tomorrow she could come back to help work on the lab things. For the first time since the crisis she actually felt like this wasn't such a bad world.


	17. Not my Maggie

Alex’s Flat (National City) 15-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:00………

Alex had spent the entire day working on the plans and information from Lena, the only thing that was drawing her attention from that was the other Luthor woman. She couldn't help but dwell on things, she put most of it down to wanting to protect Kara, but even Alex couldn’t keep up that level of denial, after all she found that each and every thing that Lex had said had been honest, she knew that Lane was going after the supers, that it was him that commissioned the red tornado. It was a robot completely designed and executed what appeared to be perfect to take down her sister. However the error in the system that happened meant that she was able to overcome the tornado. The information that the malfunction that happened, had upset Lane was something that she already had, so this wasn't expected. To hear that Lex had been the one to design it the simple error that has caused the malfunction would not have been overlooked by someone as intelligent as Lex. That meant that the likelihood was Lex told the truth that she had in fact chosen to disarm the tornado.

In addition to the knowledge that she could have easily killed her once but chose not to, led Alex to the conclusion that her statement about not hurting Kara because it would hurt Lena was also true. There was enough evidence of Lex’s passion and love towards her sister to prove that her statements connected to Lena to know that was also true. All in all the information from Lex was believable, Alex couldn't discount it and found that she was not particularly inclined to try. It seemed very much like Lex had been honest and in some cases more honest than was necessarily good for her. Her assessment of Lena was also insightful and poetic, the symbolism, the in depth thought, her analysis and assessment of the way Lena had been treated, her maximum capacity for destruction and the somewhat beautiful execution of her revenge, an almost therapeutic and cathartic exchange. It was full of love, passion, and emotion that Lex continually said that she didn't experience. 

Although Alex couldn't get behind Lena’s choice of revenge or even forgive her for hurting Kara, even though Kara was well on that road already. It did show a side to Lex that Alex was more than curious about, the sister, the protective older sister who it would appear would die for her sister, much like Alex herself. The reverse was also true she found in her meeting with Lena, that she had to admit to herself if no one else, went better than expected after a slightly rocky start.

Alex put aside the tablet she had been working on. The thoughts of Lex finally taking over as they had threatened to do all day. She couldn't help but dwell on the conversations, Lex had been taken away by the government, not imprisoned although she was not free. It seemed that she was subject to ECT and other treatments, she wondered why that might have been, although she didn't know anything about the other treatments, what hormones or neurotransmitters that they were playing with she did know that there were uses for ECT. Depression, suicidal ideation, catatonia, aggression and mania. She had not seen any of those things in Lex, yet, although there were other things she had noticed. She seemed to fight with her own mind, there were times where she seemed to mumble under her breath. She liked routine and things that were consistent. She didn't like things that changed. She was very intelligent, more so than her file suggested, she wondered if Lex was more or less the same level of intelligence as Brainy. She didn't have a filter as such she seemed to say what was on her mind, especially when she was fighting with herself, Alex was aware that she got a lot more information than she would have expected. She seemed to have an issue with emotion, and social cues. However she seemed charming and polite and her manners seemed to be always on point.

There were things that Alex discounted, Autism would explain the routine and the need for consistency, also the love of equations. It didn't seem to fit, and ECT was definitely not a treatment for that, she wondered if the fighting was anxiety or an OCD issue, that would also explain the routine. Again not generally treated with ECT, but then if it was Lillian involved that woman did not care what she did or who she hurt. After meeting the grotesque woman she had felt an unbelievable sadness and sorrow on behalf of Lena, that feeling was now transferred to Lex. There were points in the conversations where she seemed to have flashes of vulnerability, her need for Lena in her life, like she had the power to make things alright when they were not, that was something that she would never have expected Lex to highlight, she literally gave Alex the way to best hurt her. Alex found that she didn't want to, she was curious about her, everything that she thought was not the case, was Lex a product of bad PR? But she didn't deny anything that she had done, just said that it had no intent, and had been subverted by others. She wished that she had been less hungover this morning, she would have been able to get so much more information if she had been more on point. Although she did know where she would be Friday at seven and had an invite, not to mention she ate at the same café every day.

Alex lingered on thoughts of Lex, how that meeting her gave her a relief from the uneasy feeling, being from another earth the change in the timeline, all gave Alex focus that she had been missing, it left a feeling of happiness within herself, she wondered if this was thanks to her feeling more stable and comfortable after the timeline shift had knocked her off balance, she was more than happy to have had the fog lifted. Was that wall it was this strange feeling that she had towards the woman. She remembered the conversation about Maggie and Lex telling her she was gay, she had not known this and from her appearance much like Lena she wouldn't have guessed right away that they were interested in women. Alex bit her lip, she had received two compliments from Lex, her body and her mind, she smiled as she thought of it, Lex had taken notice of how she looked and complimented her on her intelligence, a massive compliment from someone as intelligent as Lex. she found that she was now dwelling on the thoughts of Lex sexually. She was someone who had one night affairs, like she couldn't manage more, but Alex couldn't help but think that she would do that with all the precision that she showed in other areas, she couldn't help but wonder if it would be something that was regimented or if the passion she saw when it came to Lena would be found in the bedroom too.

Luckily before she could delve into that too much and be faced with the realization she was intrigued and would like to find out her phone rang. She looked down to snatch it and saw Maggie's face smiling back at her. An uneasy feeling settled over her again, the same kind of feeling that was in the bar, she had thought that it was just nerves but she couldn't help but wonder if it was more than that. She remembered the night, she had been more aggressive than Alex remembered the activities seemed to be more exaggerated than they used to be, and Alex was sore following it. Maggie had often used force after drinking a lot, and there was a tendency to push her through her over sensitivity, but last night seemed more, Alex wasn't sure why she had let her do that to her. The uneasy feeling persisted as she answered the phone.

“Sawyer”

“Hey Danvers, what are you up to? Last night I didn't think we were ready for a stay over but I missed you this morning. How about a drink, Al’s?”

Alex thought back to the night before there was no discussion, no thought about going home, there was barely any words at all before the antics in the alley. It definitely didn't feel like the start of anything and Alex had not thought much beyond that one night, Maggie had not wanted her to touch her at all she had walked away confused and here was Maggie saying that she missed her and wanted her to come out for another drink? Alex wondered if there was a chance they could rekindle what they had, she was not sure there was ever going to be closure, as much as the old desire and attraction was there everything else felt different. Maggie felt different but this wasn't a nice difference like Lex. she wondered if this wasn't her Maggie?

“Uh this morning I was so hung over, how much did we drink? I was late to my meeting with Lena, and ended up running into Lex too, I was not in any fit state for either really, I have been working on stuff all day, not really up for Al’s”

“Lex, god what a bitch, I mean I heard about her and knew she was some kind of inhuman monster without a soul but shit, she surpassed any expectations at all, I am surprised that you managed to hold out as long as you did. She is making it impossible to do my job, Level 1 access, I mean she is treating me like one of those green ass wet behind the ear recruits.”

Alex felt herself bristle as she spoke about Lex, she was not a monster far from it, she was direct and honest but not evil, and Maggie talking about her that way had Alex’s heckles up. She was not happy to hear that. Level 1 access, that was low, she should have come in on 4 at least but she was sure that Lex had a reason, if Maggie had gone at her like the day they first met, Lex would have made a point to put her in her place. She smiled for a moment thinking about how Lex would have handled her, she would have loved to be a fly on the wall for that. Alex almost felt compelled to defend Lex, but she held back the impulse, she could tell that Maggie wouldn't be open to that and it would just cause an argument. She decided to steer away from Lex, the woman was confusing her enough without this need to protect her.

“Level 1 huh, that means you will need an escort to most of the DEO, who has she put as your supervisor? Whoever it is should be able to move you through the training and tests quickly. You will need access at level 4 to be effective and shouldn't take you more than a week.”

“Ha yeah right that bitch, she saw the looks Agent Alex lover was giving me all day, and her fucking smile when she called her in and instructed her to strip my access not to mention giving her the ability to appraise me. That bloody agent had it in for me from the moment we got together, she wanted you for herself and didnt like that I was the one you wanted. That Jealous bitch is going to make my life hell and Lex is going to sit back and watch. Lex was threatening to take my job away unless I satisfy that bloody Vasquez”

Alex wasn't sure what part of that last statement upset her more, the continued attack on Lex or the assumptions about Vasquez. The name that she used for her was new, she had never heard her say that before and the assumption that Vasquez was interested in her and that was why she and Maggie didn't hit it off was ludicrous. Again the thought entered her mind that this wasn't her Maggie, although Alex had always regretted the end of the relationship with her Maggie, and with the exception of their less than healthy relationship with alcohol and sex the rest of it was amazing, the passion. Kelly helped her understand that the relationship was a little toxic, it was possible to work on it, although she had to admit although Kelly was the better choice there just wasn't the chemistry. Sex had been different and she could see that the dominance wasn’t needed in the bedroom all the time although fun here and there they should be more equal.

“Agent Vasquez is a good agent and she will get you through, as for Lex’s decision she doesn't care for interactions between people, social relationships and people don't hold much interest for her, so I am sure whatever the reason was, it wasn't because of the impact it had on you. I get the impression that humanity as a whole holds very little interest to Lex, I mean she is so interested in how everything works but not people, it's like she finds them boring, unless well, unless she can’t work you out in two minutes.”

Alex preened for a moment and wasn't really listening to Maggie's response, she was quietly happy to think that unlike most people Lex found her a little more interesting because she couldn't work her out, that she was more complex than the average human, what had Lex called her a inconsistent variable, someone Lex couldn’t fit in a box and anticipate, she liked that. Maggie was still speaking and Alex pulled herself from her mind to listen.

“So yeah the point is whatever is going down at the DEO I will find out, no matter how hard those two make it for me, I am not a basic bitch and they will know that soon enough. Anyway after such a shitty day I could do with a drinking buddy, not to mention after last night I can't wait to see you again, god I have missed being with you. I know you're single and well so am I, I get we want different things but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy each other.”

What the hell, enjoy each other, take herself off the market, put aside her desires to be what a play thing? The way Maggie was talking about the memory of last night, she wasn't just an itch scratcher, she definitely wasn't a toy, and she wasn’t getting herself back in the situation from last night, she shouldn't have let it happen.

“I am not being funny Mags, but Last night wasn't exactly a good time, I was too drunk and let you get away with things that I shouldn't have, I think that I have grown since we were together, I am not; what was it you called me fresh of the boat, any more and I know that sex isn’t about that, its not about pushing the other down like that, not about dominating them not when that desire is one sided. It is not what I am into and honestly, I am not looking to start drinking daily and becoming lost in alcohol fueled friends with benefits arrangements. I have moved on and that is not what I want, I still want someone in my life, children and love. As much as you were the love of my life at the time I am worth more than that.”

“You always enjoyed the way we would fuck all night with passion, come on, Alex it’s just a drink I had a shit day, that Luthor woman really messed everything up for me, it took all day to track the bitch down and then she threatened me and made everything more difficult. Come on have a drink we can exchange stories about the evil bitch in charge.” 

It was clear to Alex that Maggie was not listening to her, she was not taking no for an answer, before she didn't take much convincing to go for a drink, she would have done anything for one of Maggie's smiles but this was not the case any more. It was also clear to her that Maggie's need to take pot shots at Lex was wearing things on her too, Lex was not the monster she was made out to be, she was not Evil. she didn't deserve that kind of hate, she wasn't even interested in the DEO, she thought about that for a moment, Alex had been running the place Lex was rarely there and when she was she wasn't happy about it. She really didn't want to have anything to do with it, she felt a small pang of guilt, maybe she should have stayed. God did she just think that she should have stayed to help Lex Luthor. Alex needed to find out more about Lex, more information, more interaction she needed to find out where all this was coming from.

“Look Maggie, Lex is not the monster that people think she is, Let me guess you went in all guns blazing pissed off and aggressive, you didn't give her any respect and pushed her. Much like our first meeting, only Lex didn't bite back instead she put you in your place, reminding you that she was in charge. Which you didn't like, and now you want to get drunk and fuck me, dominate me and push me down to make you feel tough and strong again. It isn't going to happen Maggie, you and me, we are done, we are in the past and that is where we need to stay. I am done, I am not your punching bag and I am never going to be. Do what you do best Maggie, find someone else to scratch that itch and move on.”

Alex hung up and tossed the phone to the side. She had never stood up to Maggie like that, the only time she had lost it was when Kara was in danger, this time it was the comments about lex that pushed her into anger, that thought scared her, was she interested in Lex? Had the reason that the date sat well with her because she was attracted to her. She needed to observe the woman, maybe there was some truth that there was more going on with Lex, maybe the information overload was more about making Alex think she was being honest to stop her looking for more. She was looking forward to the idea of dinner, getting to see her again and find out more, but that wasn't until Friday. Alex decided that she would watch her, maybe get more answers without Lex knowing. Tomorrow she could go to the Café and watch what she does. She wasn't sure what she would learn from watching her eat breakfast, but she could then follow her to wherever she was going. There was a thought in the back of her mind that Alex was not willing to process. She wanted to see her again and Friday was too long to wait.

Andrews Café (National City) 16-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:40………

Alex had dressed with a beanie covering her hair, she didn't need to stand out, she wore jeans and a hoodie, nothing flash but also not her normal black, that would stand out. She had entered the Café and briefly sat in Lex’s booth much to the dismay of the wait staff, she looked around and assessed the seats for the one that was most obscured from the view but that would give her a view of Lex and the door. She stood and moved from the booth before the waitress made it to her, and smiled as she walked passed to the counter ordering food and then taking a seat in her chosen location. She set up the table, with her book and a small mirror to see the seat more clearly. She would be in the perfect position to keep an eye out for Lex and then she could follow her, she didn't pick a seat in earshot, Lex’s interactions with wait staff did not interest her. This was a decision that she would come to regret the moment that Lena entered the Café.

Lena had walked with purpose into the Café and took a seat on the other side of the booth that Lex normally sat. Alex could hear the staff talking in hushed tones.

“What is the interest with that booth today? Someone is going to have to move her, Miss Luthor will be here in five at the most, we don't want to give her a reason to choose to eat somewhere else, her tips alone keep this place afloat, not to mention the money she had gifted for repairs and modifications.”

“I don't know who the first one was but she moved on her own, I recognize her though. That's Lena Luthor, Lex's sister, they had breakfast together on Tuesday.”

“Should we move her until she gets here or leave her? I don't really want either of them to feel unwelcome”

Alex listened to the redhead and brunette standing just to the side of the counter the thought that someone with the wealth of Lex would be a good tipper wasn't anything unexpected, neither was the vested interest in keeping the routine by paying for modifications and repairs. That her and Lena met for breakfast now that was interesting. She continued to listen, turning her page making it look like she wasn't.

“Really after all these months, Lena joined her for breakfast? That's great she always looks so lonely, she has been alone every morning, I was starting to think that she had no one, such a shame she seems so nice not what people say at all”

“That's not all, yesterday she had another woman join her, I am not sure who that was, but they chatted away through breakfast and Lex was actually smiling.”

Alex shifted uncomfortably and moved her hoodie a little. She didn't want to be recognized by the gossiping staff, she wondered if Lex knew how much they gossiped in here? She was a private person by most accounts, with intermittent exuberance and party girl activities, although they have been less frequent in the past few years, although with what Lex said she was not exactly in the place for that recently. Alex may have been researching until the very early hours, looking more into Lex and getting thrown by the photo’s of her at functions looking stunning and smiling brightly. How different that woman looked to the one that Alex had met. She couldn't help but wonder what caused the intermittent exposure within the media. When the bell rang she focused on the small mirror. It was Lex. she stepped into view, her dark hair perfectly styled, it looked so soft, just above the shoulder in a sort of bob with light feathering over the front framing her face and highlighting her strong jaw. Her dark eyes scanned for a second before seeing Lena, the smile on the scarlet lips was instant and there was a sparkle in her eyes. All complimented by her pale skin, not as pale as Lena there was a slight bronzing, she wondered if she spent more time out of the lab would she tan, the skin looked soft and flawless.

She watched as Lex moved forward and Lena stood, Lex instantly moving into her space and wrapping her arms around the younger woman. One hand tight around her waist and the other up her back to the rear of Lena's shoulder, holding her tightly and close, her head had slipped into the crook of her neck and although the smile was still wide her eyes closed. Lena's arms had moved around Lex too pulling her close and holding her like there was no tomorrow, it reminded her of the way she and Kara hugged. Hard and tight so that Kara would feel it, something that pulled them together and almost melded them together. The same was true of the Luthor sisters, it was like they were each other's life line, they held on so tight, and for longer than Alex would have expected. As they pulled apart Lex squeezed Lena’s shoulders and then her hands before sitting down. Alex cursed the distance, this was something that she would be very interested in indeed, not only hearing more about Lex but Lena too, if there was any deception on either part this would be where she would learn it. She would have to settle to watching and what she could decipher from lip reading. Not her strongest skill. She kind of wished that she had left a listening device in the chair, but she didn't have access to tech like that right now. Her food arrived and she ate, no longer needing to change the page as she watched.


	18. The Luthor sisters

Andrews café (National City) 16-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:00………

Lex arrived at the café and opened the door, she had agreed to meeting with Lena here, and hoped that she would come, after all they had been apart so long she wasn't sure that she would, maybe she had changed over the years, everything else had. She walked in and scanned the café before seeing Lena stand and head towards her. She smiled brightly at the sight and pulled her into a hug, Lena was the only one that could hug her without hurting her. She knew exactly how to hold Lex to make her feel safe, and grounded without any discomfort. She had missed these hugs and lingered, Lena had always allowed Lex to dictate the length of hugs and all physical contact, she had always understood the difficulties she had. She pulled back placing her hands on her shoulders and looking into Lena’s emerald eyes, she could see something different in there, raising her brow as she watched as Lena’s lips curled and pulled into a wide smile.

“You told her”

Lex spoke with a wide smile on her own face and slipped her hands to Lena’s squeezing them before sliding into the booth. She could see the difference in Lena, she was lighter, easier to smile, the upset at being away from Kara was gone and it was replaced, she had only ever seen Lena with that look once back when Jack was around. She must have told her that she had feelings for her and from the look of Lena it had gone very well.

Lena couldn't contain her happiness, she couldn't wait to tell Lexi what happened with her and Kara, she knew Lexi wasn't a fan of the kryptonian but she loved her and that was the thing that would make her happy for her. She was early at the café and waiting anxiously. The moment Lexi came in she hugged her hard and with purpose as she always did. Lexi’s words caused the smile on her face to spread only wider. She nodded and slipped into the booth looking at her sister.

“I did, it was last night, she came over to help me with the energy cells, she had flown to France and Italy to get food and I couldn't help but think that it was a little much for someone who was eating with a friend, especially as Kara would be happy with pizza and Potstickers. She had done that for me and it made me think that she could like me too, so I questioned her a little and then, we kissed. We have a shopping date Friday for the Gala on Saturday and she is going to come as my date, she called me Zhao”

At the mention of the kryptonian word Lex raised her brow. That wasn't just any expression, that was a declaration with intent, she was setting out her intention to be with Lena forever. It wasn't love, not just love it was romantic love, sexual, destined, a love that was reserved for the bonded partner and Kryptonian's bonded for life. Kara was serious about this, she was very serious about how she felt for Lena, Lex was probably the only person in the world that truly understand this, she had studied Kryptonian culture, finding the fortress she had watched the Crystals, understood their language and their culture better than anyone except Kara and superman. She glanced down to Lena’s wrist as there was no cuff sitting there, so Kara had not made it official yet, but she figured that it wouldn't be long. Kryptonian engagements were never long.

“That is a big word, Lena bean did she explain what that meant little sister? Did you understand and accept?”

Lena looked at Lexi, of course she would know what it meant, she should have thought about that, maybe it wasn't such a good thing to tell her, she struggled with Kryptonian's, but at the same time she was her sister, and she wanted to share everything with her. Including this. Especially this, she was so happy and she wanted her sister to be a part of that always. She watched Lena looking at her, the smile didn't falter and she could see no malice in her.

“Its all I have wanted for three years, she explained it is normally only used for a bonded pair, and that suggests that this is a forever connection, she didn't ask, and I haven't accepted, although if she were to I would, I love her you know that, I have for years.”

Lex looked at her and rounded the table, sliding in next to her and Wrapping her in a massive hug. She held on tightly and squeezed, spontaneous hugging wasn't something Lex did often but sometimes when there was a rush of emotion, especially when it was connected to Lena, she found it better to go with it. She held her for a few moments until she felt she had conveyed enough of what she was feeling and then moved back placing her hand on Lena’s cheek and whipping away a tear that had spilled from her with her thumb as she cupped Lena’s face.

“I am so pleased for you, I am glad that you have finally managed to tell her how you feel and found, what it was plain to see to everyone else, that she was in love with you too. Who in their right mind would not be little sister, you are the kindest most amazing person that I know.”

Lena had been on the receiving end of the occasional non conformist hug a few times, each time she found herself emotional and often shed a tear, she knew that it was emotion within her sister that pulled her forward, she knew also that her sister didn't understand it, and with most people she wouldn't act on it, but Lena loved that her sister felt comfortable enough to do so with her. She felt the tear unlash from her eye and Lexi pulled back, she smiled as Lexi put herself into a level of discomfort to wipe it away and cup her face, she knew that the light touch was uncomfortable and a little painful for her sister. That made the moments like this even more special, it was moments like this when Lexi’s true heart could be seen, when she moved out of her own awareness and her own comfort to connect on a different level with her. Lena blushed and leaned in a little harder to Lexi’s hand to reduce the discomfort for her sister.

“Thank you Lexi, Everything seems to be getting better, I have Kara, I am enjoying my work, and I have you back with me again. I thought I had lost you forever” 

Lex shook her head and moved back the smile still playing on her face as she resituated herself on her own side of the booth, she looked up and saw the waitress approach and look at them.

“Your usual Miss Luthor?”

“No today is a celebration, we will have coffee black as always but chocolate chip pancakes, strawberries and cream and a side of maple, all individually placed please”

The woman nodded and moved away. She already knew the rules for serving Lex as did the kitchen although this change was a little unexpected the different order did not change the general rule. She walked passed to the counter and made the order ensuring that they knew it was for Miss Luthor and that each part needed to be delivered on individual plates no touching food. Alex who had positioned herself heard the order that didn't seem like a normal order, the way the woman spoke it was clear that this was something different for Lex, she wondered what had prompted the change. She had watched with intrigue as they spoke and Lex was smiling brightly, she was happy, her face lit up and she looked beautiful. Alex had to dismiss the thought as it entered her mind. She had watched the way that Lex had moved around the table and held her again, the soft way that she had cupped her face and brushed away a tear, although Lena had not looked upset, she had blushed at whatever Lex had said and moved her head into her hand. The touch was soft, sweet, loving, it looked like something that Alex would have done to Kara, it was loving and soft. Full of emotion and love, things that Lex said that she didn't feel.

Alex couldn't help but wonder what that would be like, not the lack of emotion but the feel of Lex expressing emotion towards you, the way she had to Lena, the softness of her hand against your face. To feel love from someone who doesn't often feel anything, how special you must be to provoke emotion in someone like Lex. Alex didn't think Lex was a monster or sub human, but she figured the lack of emotions was something that was connected to the treatments that Lillian had done the experimentation. She wondered how much love would have to be behind that simple expression to cause a reaction in Lex. she couldn't help wonder how much it would mean to be on the receiving end of that, how it would feel to have Lex focused on you so intently as she was Lena. Alex tried to pull her mind away. She ordered another coffee, something to distract and went back to watching. The food was arriving all separate, Lex didn't like anything touching, that put more weight to the OCD theory.

Lex had spotted Alex on her return to her side of the table as she was ordering coffee, she was not sure if she was here to watch Lena or her, but she wasn't concerned at this time. She knew that she couldn't be tracked and she had said she would not hurt Lena, it was interesting, she wondered what it was that kept bringing the older Danvers girl into her circle and why she was happy to see her, as the food was placed down

Lex smiled and thanked the waitress and then looked at the food before her, everything was separated just as she liked it. She placed items on her plate keeping them separate. She watched as Lena sipped her coffee as she read and she smiled, she was always more interested in things than Lex, and of course this being in regards to Kara was of more interest especially now. She took a mouthful of pancake, then dipped her strawberry in the cream before popping that in her mouth too.

“I really missed you Lexi, I thought you were dead and it didn't stop me missing you every day, I am so happy that we can have time together again, I hope that we can continue to meet for breakfast, maybe you could even visit me at my place, and have dinner, just as much as you can manage though.”

“I know that I am not exactly normal Lena, but I care about you, and when you are not with me it is difficult, not just because you help keep me stable but because you leave a gap in me, I dwell on thoughts of you, and although there is solace in memory it isn't the same. All the time I was kept by the government and in the hospital, I was told you didn't want to see me, the day I came to this earth I reached out expecting you to turn away. I know I am not normal and wish I was more like you, I don't mean to be a burden Lenabean but I am glad you are here, you make me feel better. I find that you come to mind, and when i haven't seen you it happens more frequently until i see you, this I believe is the same as missing you”

Lena hated the way that Lex talked about herself, she was not a burden, she wasn't defective, she was perfect as herself she didn't ever see her as less than that. Lexi was the most important person in her life as a child, having her ripped away from her had been the most horrible thing that ever happened. She leaned across the table and took a firm grip of Lexi’s hand looking into her eyes.

“You do not ever need to worry about me Lexi, I will always want you in my life, I love you so much, you are extraordinary, never wish to be anything less than you are. You will never be a burden to me”

Lex squeezed back and smiled at her sister. Lena always made her comfortable, she relied on that so many times. Now Lena was relying on her to protect the woman that she loved. She smiled and slid the paperwork to her.

“It is contract renewal time. I thought that you would want to see this one. The other one for Kara is about a designation, it changes her from consultant to asset. I am not sure why that needs to be completed separately; there is no specific human resource needed to do it that way, in fact it adds additional work.”

Lena had read the new contract it was a good move for Kara it would give her benefits and a salary instead of a consulting pay, that would only be implemented after she was called in, the rate would be different but the money would be more stable, meaning that she was more secure, not that Lena would let her be short of anything but, Kara was proud and wanted to pay her own way. There was a limit on what she would allow Lena to do for her, the distinction that Lex picked up was more because of her need for consistency and her desire for effectiveness, she didn't know what she had stumbled across with the two pieces of paperwork. By separating them Kara would only see the change in contract not the change of classification to her role. Lena didn't like that, what benefit was it turning her to an asset over a consultant. She picked up the other and then realized, assets were terminatable, she wasn't convinced that there was anything that the government had that could terminate Kara, but she didn't really want to take that chance.

“They have separated it so that Kara can not see the change in designation although the contract is a good change the clause in the last paragraph allows her classification to be altered without notification. This one is a change of classification meaning that she will be seen as an assessor, much like information or a computer, expendable and easily terminated.”

Lex looked up at her, there was nothing that the government had, nothing that could harm the Kryptonian, but they could not treat her when she was hurt by others, or take her out when she solar flared. Lex on the other hand would be able to terminate her quite easily if she chose, but why would anyone choose to do that, waste a good defense against stronger enemies? The threat she posed was minimal in comparison to superman although he was weaker in ever respect than Kara. it was his humanity that caused the issue, pride, anger, self righteousness and the inconsistency, Kara wasn't like that she was more practical less human in some ways.

“Well although there are ways to do so it wouldn't be easy, although being an asset would give her less rights, a possession she could be ordered to do things that she didn't want to and then they would have an excuse to use that against her. What would you like me to do with it Lena?”

“Offer the new contract to Kara but don’t sign this, she maybe in need of the easy disconnect from the DEO but I don't like the idea of this removing her rights”

Lex took the forms back and watched as Lena started to eat. She liked seeing Lena eat, she was a little larger than Lex which caused her additional ridicule from her mother, but she was beautiful and Lex hated it when she lost so much weight she didn't look right. She glanced in the direction of Alex again and wondered what it was that she was hoping to gain from watching her and Lena eat breakfast. She looked up at Lena and raised her brow.

“How did your Meeting with Alex Danvers go? Should I be concerned if there is a chance that she will be a threat to you?”

Lena wasn't sure exactly what prompted the change in conversation and tilted her head looking at Lexi, it was strange for her to take much interest in the meeting itself but the intent became clear when she clarified that she wanted to know if there was anything to worry about. She smiled at her, ever the protective sister, she loved that about Lex, she remembered her taking on a bully in school because of their treatment of Lena, she had reduced him to a quivering mess and hadn't even lifted a finger, it was masterful, she wondered what would happen if she turned that ability against Lillian, she had often wondered that though her childhood, but Lex needed her, although not for much longer she hoped. The pill was completed and it needed a test but she wasn't willing to give it to Lex until it was needed. She started her reply a little jokingly but then became more serious.

“Maybe I should ask you how breakfast was with the rather attractive, former agent? However the meeting was good, productive it went very well actually. I think that everything will be alright, I mean we are not friends not like we were, but I think we have the same goal and can work together, she is more stubborn than a Luthor.”

“Breakfast was unexpected, she joined me after a long night and we shared a conversation and a curious invitation to dinner, that is not the reason I ask, she is watching us, don't look around, I can see her, I was just trying to ascertain why she is here, she is somewhat of a unexplainable human don't you think, she is a inconsistent variable and I find myself at a loss as to what she is doing, and why?”

Lena didn't look around; she kept her eyes fixed on Lexi. unexplainable human, inconsistent variable, these were words that normally resulted in Lex becoming unstable but instead she appeared curious. Interested, maybe the comment about the attractiveness of the older Danvers had been more prophetic than a joke. Why would Alex be there? She thought that she had dissuaded her from thinking that Lexi was a threat and it would appear that Lexi thought she had done the same for her, but Alex was a big sister herself, protective to a fault.

“Well maybe she is planning on giving me the shovel talk following the change in relationship with Kara and myself, she can see me enter Luthor Corp from there?”

Lex couldn't help but dwell on the thought that Alex was observing, was she curious about her, she had definitely found herself lingering on thoughts of her, she wondered if Lena would have any information about the older Danvers girl she just suggested that they were friends previously. She bit her lip as she was thinking about her.

Alex saw the lip bite, she was almost sure that Lex had mentioned her by name a moment ago, she was wondering if the biting of the lip was in someway connected, the most surprising thing was she hoped that it was, it was becoming increasingly more prominent in her mind that she felt it would be nice to be someone that Lex was interested in, she was definitely prominent in her mind. She watched Lex’s lips, as she asked the next question and smiled when her name was wrapped around the luscious lips of Lex Luthor. God did she just think that?

“What do you know about Alex Danvers?”

“Well she is smart, strong, independent, fiercely loyal, stubborn, sometimes spontaneous to the point she doesn't think of consequences. She loves Kara more than anything in the world, and would and has protected her with her life, almost not making it a number of times. She is sarcastic and funny, likes to bet on people, she can be difficult to change the mind of, she loves games, action movies, good scotch, she is a skilled scientist, agent, leader and above all else she is pretty selfless. Why?”

Lena wondered why Lex would ask this, she knew that Lex would have had access to her file, and would have been able to read everything that was in there, so she added little personal details to the list, it was a strange and sudden a change, but Lena knew well enough that Lexi never asked anything without a reason.

“Well I have been on this earth for months, and have had no involvement with either of the Danvers sisters, which was fine, I was able to carry on with my work without interference. Since going to the DEO on Tuesday I have spoken to her twice, both times she has caused difficulties, which I have managed to control, and then she was talking about your meeting and asked me out as some form of distraction, although when pressed, she pointed out that she was not like others and was curious about me, not only that but she wanted to take me out. With the fact that the possible date was a distraction I wouldn't accept but did give her the option to join me tomorrow. Now she is here, watching and I can't help but wonder why. There are so many things that I am intrigued by when thinking about Alex Danvers, she seems to pop up not only everywhere I go but in my mind.”

Lena listened to her, the information was definitely unexpected, the idea that Alex was able to somehow test her boundaries and not tip her over, the fact that she was dwelling on her, popping into her mind, and that Lexi and Alex were going on a possible date? Lena couldn't quite believe what she was hearing, Lexi liked her, she was attracted to her. She couldn't think of anyone Lexi had ever been interested in, there were letters when she was at boarding school but that seemed to end badly.

“Lexi, do you think that maybe you like Alex? You know, like her like her?”

Lex contemplated the question for a moment and then tilted her head wondering if there was any substance to the observation. She was thinking about her more than she would normally think of a random human, and she had found her company to be interesting. However what Lena was suggesting was a romantic entanglement, something that was not within her remit at all.

“I do not think that that is a plausible conclusion little sister, I think that your thinking may be flawed. Did we not discuss earlier how I don't have the normal range of human emotions, you appear to be attributing them to me anyway.”

Lena knew that was the last of that conversation for a while, they finished breakfast and said their goodbyes. Lena glanced at Alex as she left wondering if maybe there was more to her appearance here than a covert op. She knew how charming Lexi was, she had many people over the years crying on her shoulder over the fact that Lexi didn't seem to notice them no matter how they tried. Looked at Alex shrinking away she wondered, had the older Danvers girl been charmed by her sister too?

Alex watched them Leave, no longer interested in following Lex, she needed to talk to Kara. Maggie, Lex everything was confusing her.


	19. Danvers and Luthors

Andrews café (National City) 16-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:30………

Alex knew that Kara would be heading to Noonan's after her patrol, she was almost as predictable as Lex’s routine; she decided to change her course and go to see Kara, that was most important right now. She was not sure what was happening with Lex and Lena although it looked like a loving sister meeting, she did wonder if there was something else there too. Were they working together on something? Lena was supposedly working with Alex on the super friends base, but maybe she was working with Lex too, playing both sides? But there was something very happy in regards to the exchange between them. She made her way down town towards Noonan's. She walked in and looked around seeing Kara sat happily in a booth with a pile of sticky buns. She smiled and ordered a coffee, heading back to the seat.

Noonan's (National City) 16-03-2020 Earth Prime 08:00………

Kara had done her normal patrol and made a few little saves, helped a few citizens of the national city but nothing too big was needed. She was starting to wonder if this new world had some kind of clause in it to render her obsolete, the previous Lex would love that, a hero with no one to save. She was finding it strangely appealing though especially after her recent relationship change with Lena, being able to work in the lab to be able to spend time with her without interruption was an amazing thing. She had been enjoying working in the lab, she had been enjoying the kisses that came with soft speaking from the night before. She had sat at the booth, she had time before going into work to enjoy her breakfast, she looked up when a familiar heart beat entered the Café and she saw Alex, she smiled brightly and waited for her to join her. It was nice to have Alex with her. Once she sat down Kara offered a sticky bun but Alex just shook her head.

“Hey Alex, how did the Meeting with Lena go yesterday? You were talking to someone before?, I meant to tell you that Maggie was back. I hope running into her wasn't too difficult for you?, I am sorry I didn't get to you first. I know we only had a chat a few days ago but it feels like so long, and so much has happened even though the city has been quiet, did you leave the DEO? Have you decided to help with the new project? Are you going to take one of the paid positions?”

Alex listened to Kara’s ramble so many questions, so many things have changed in the past few days, and it had left Alex in a very strange position, confused and not really sure what direction that she was going to take. She thought about the questions and then decided that she needed to answer some of them more fully than others especially if she was hoping for some clarity from Kara.

“I left the DEO yes, and the meeting went better than expected, there is a option for ten members of the team paid, and then Nia and Brainy and maybe myself as additions not paid, I will try and get ten agents on board as that offers more support but it does mean I will need a flexible job. As for talking to someone that was Lex, she was at the Café, she is a very interesting person. Not what I was expecting at all, and after meeting with her that strange feeling I have been experiencing was gone. As for Maggie we have met up and it was kind of like the old days but not, I was wondering if she was not the Maggie that was originally on our earth there was an unexpected exchange.”

Kara listened, she expected Alex to refuse the job, and the salaries, Lena had been over generous and Alex didn't like the thought of being beholden to Lena, especially after everything. She looked at her tilting her head lightly. Alex's heart was off, she was anxious. What was causing this anxiety in her, having breakfast with Lex was something she didn't expect but Maggie, she was sure that the detective would be back on Alex’s radar. Alex had noticed the difference this time, that was new, Alex had not registered the change in people close to her particularly mainly because the new earth was constructed of many, something had changed.

“Maggie wasn't the original one no, but it's interesting you noticed, what do you mean an unexpected exchange Alex?”

“Well after I met with Lex, and quit there was an interesting conversation and the world seemed to shift, I know that sounds strange but the feeling that I have been having dissipated, then I went to Al’s to have a drink and bumped into Maggie. She is back working as a liaison to the DEO and was a little annoyed that I had quit. We caught up over some drinks and then, well lets just say we fell into old patterns.”

Kara looked at her and her eyes opened wide for a moment, old patterns, did that mean what Kara though it did? Oh Rao Alex wasn't being sucked back into that relationship with Maggie again was she? She couldn't help but think that this was something that would be harmful to Alex, she hadn't been drinking as much since the relationship with Kelly she thought that she had put a end to the thoughts of Maggie, Kara had hoped that even though it was not her Kelly they would stay together she didn't want this for her. Her mind drifted to the words of James Kavanaugh.

“To love is not to possess, To own or imprison, Nor to lose one’s self in another. Love is to join and separate, To walk alone and together, To find a laughing freedom, That lonely isolation does not permit. It is finally to be able, To be who we really are. Maggie and you, the love you had, it wasn't like it should be, you drank too much, you were her possession Alex, I thought you worked through that, you're not going to slip back into that.”

Alex listened to Kara, was that something from scripture? She was sure she heard it before, and the comments on Maggie, well Kara was one to talk! her and Lena didn't have the best history yet she was always ready to forgive her, and let her back in. As for Maggie she already knew that it wasn't healthy. It wasn't the same, this version of her was even more toxic, it was like her worse qualities, their worst interconnections were more aggressive, more dominating and she was definitely not going to go back for seconds. She didn't want to argue though she needed to have time to reflect to talk to Kara.

“Are you quoting the bible at me Kara? I mean I know I have heard that in church. Don't worry about Maggie, it was definitely not something I intend to repeat, and I am more than aware that it isn't healthy. You should think about that yourself, not to own or impression, isn't that exactly what Lena did? I know you want to forgive her and have her back in your life, but remember she is dangerous, she made you something that you are not. She is working with Lex too, I watched them at breakfast this morning, they are up to something.”

Kara listened, she knew Alex’s stand on Lena but hoped that there was some way that she would be able to see that Lena was different, that they had done things to each other, that the problems were both of their construction, because of lies and half truths. If Kara had known that Lena loved her back all those years ago things would have been different; they were holding so much back from each other. Kara didn't realize the damage she was doing, that both versions of her had done to both versions of them. She wanted Alex to really understand.

“Not from the bible although it is often in church at weddings it is the writing of James Kavanaugh. It doesn't make it less relevant, and yes I am aware that Lena and I have hurt each other, you only see what she did to me, but I think I know why. We had the time apart and that Was horrible. I could hear her heart every anxiety dip in mood but I couldn’t see her, then she text and we met for lunch, she is working on power batteries to store solar energy and I offered to help and then we’ll..”

Kara looked away for a moment and then started playing with her sleeve. The words bubble up and without a pause or breath everything spilled out in somewhat faster than human pace.

“So I flew about a bit for dinner and she realized and then she asked if I do that for you I said you like Chicago pizza haha and then she asked if I liked her more than I was sharing and then we kissed and that was Rao I almost floated out the lab and we worked together and she asked me out we went shopping and I am going to the gala Saturday and it will probably be in the papers and I want your help to look nice because it’s an official date. You can only truly hurt someone as deeply as i hurt Lena when that person loved you so much, I know that you can't forgive her but please Alex, please don’t be mad”

Alex thought back to the moment in the Café, she was sure that she had seen Lex say a kryptonian word before there was that hug, Lena had cried with Joy, Lex had been so tender with her. Was she telling her that Kara and her were together? Was that why they had shared that intimate moment, the moment that had confused and excited Alex. She wanted to have that feeling for Kara but she couldn't. She just couldn't forget, seeing the green veins covering her face, as she cried in pain inside a cage of Kryptonite. It was one of the most haunting visions of her life, topped only by the death at the hands of red daughter, and the defeat from reign, both people that Kara forgave. Alex had forgiven Sam she didn't have a choice, but Lena chose that path. The information about the love was interesting, it was something that Kara had for Lena and that Lena had for Kara, she was not oblivious to that.

“I am not going to ever forget her putting you in that cage, watching the cannons target you with cannons filled with Kryptonite, manipulating you but I love you, and I want you to be happy Kara. I can't forget how she hurt you, emotionally and physically for months, how she took all that you are and used it against you. I will be civil. I will work with the super friends project and I will happily help you pick an outfit for the date, but I can't forgive her.”

Kara shrunk back a little waiting for Alex to speak, she fiddled with her hands nervously and watched the emotions play over Alex’s face. Her words every bit the protective sister that she loved, she just hoped that there would be a way to bring her round. She took a deep breath and tried to formulate a response to that Carefully constructed debate like synopsis.

“She feels terrible about everything and is constantly apologizing, she knows that she went down the wrong path and that she crossed a line but she also saved my life. She saved us from the daxamites, save alien life, helped us find the ship, put her mother away, took down weapons that could kill me, saved Sam, saved what’s left of my home world, get millions off earth saving countless lives, built the environmental suit not once but twice stopped Andrea killing me and most importantly she loves me”

She looked down and bit her lip. She knew it would take time for Alex to come around, but she would hopefully try. She wanted her to be a part of her happiness as much as Alex wanted to be part of protecting her but that was a long way off and Kara knew it.

“We are going shopping tomorrow, I would love help with my hair and make up, and I would like you to try, not just forgive and forget but try not to make it clear you don’t like or trust her, to give her a chance”

Kara felt her heart grow heavy and she looked down at her hands, she fiddled with her cuffs and pulled at them. Alex seemed to really hate Lena, she only saw the bad not the good, not the amazing things she had done. She sighed out of her body. Kara wiped away the tear on her face with a burst of super speed, she didn’t want the two most important people to hate each other, it would make things hard.

“Maggie and you, she broke your heart twice, turned you away, played hot and cold, then comes back and you start things up again, if that what you have chosen I am happy for you, I kind of hoped for the same”

Alex listened, she couldn't deny any of it, Lena had done amazing things, and Kara’s assessment of her and Maggie was also spot on. She could see that Kara’s reflection on Lena had been accurate to a point too, she really was an amazing woman and she had done so many good things, mostly she could see that Kara really did love Lena. More so than she had ever imagined possible she would do everything she could to make sure that she was behind her completely, after all there was nothing in the universe that Alex loved more than Kara. She smiled at her and nodded.

“There is nothing between Maggie and I, I am not going down that road, it was a slip but I am done with it. As for Lena and you, Kara I am always behind you 100%. You know that, I will help with your hair, talk you down from your anxiety and I will always be happy for you. I will work on my feelings towards Lena, and I will do all I can, but I can't forget what happened. I will always be there watching and If she steps out of line, I will stop her. I would love to see what you buy but it will have to wait I am meeting with Lex for dinner on Friday”

Kara listened and she could see that there was no way that Alex was going to soften and Lena; well Lena was fragile and still not ready to meet with the others, knowing Alex was hostile she couldn’t do that to her. She nodded sadly at her sister and started to shovel food in her mouth. She didn’t want to fight with her, but this changed things, she couldn’t bring them together not yet not like this, Kara wasn’t sure what this meant long ten but for now she was back to living two lives. Kara nodded that she loved that her sister was protective but she wanted to have both the women she loved in her life equally, to have girls nights, and games nights again. Kara wasn’t sure that this was a better topic of conversation but she couldn’t think of anything else in the moment. Her heart was heavy and she didn’t like feeling that way around Alex. She ate more of her food waiting for the feeling to subside. She had never been able to stay mad at Alex long she hoped that this feeling of sadness would subside too. She looked at her sister and bit her lip and wondered if Lex had explained that she wasn’t from this earth?

“You know she isn’t stable. Alex Lena has told me about her, how she is not the Lex from this earth, as much as Lena is not the original Lena, I didn't mention it before because the time lines are similar. Both the Luthor women are from a different multiverse. I worry about you meeting with her. I know you think it’s best you keeping an eye on her but it worries me Alex”

That was an interesting bit of information, Kara knew this wasn't her original Lena but loved her anyway, and she knew that Lex was unstable? What the hell did that mean, she knew that there was something off about Lex, that she was different but Lena was saying that she was unstable, that was interesting, Lena seemed to love her so much, why would she say that? Lena had been so protective of Lex when they talked about her, why she would protect her against Alex and then say something like that to Kara.

“Well I am not sure about unstable, she has some interesting attributes, and there are some differences that I am trying to work out, I don't know all of the facts, I am piecing together a puzzle, and there is a significant connection to Lena, she seems to be a failsafe for Lex, she is very important, she defends her with as much passion as you. I know that she has had treatments and things in the past but I don't know what for. She has not had an easy life I can tell that, and she told me herself that she is from a different world. She has been nothing but honest so far, although I am keeping an eye on her, and I want to find out more. She intrigues me.”

Kara’s mouth opened and closed, she wasn’t sure what to make of this information at all, she knew Lena was trying to help her to avoid further damage and instability. She knew that Lex had both emotional instability and was once pushed into a catatonic state. She also understood that Lex had Asperger's syndrome, Lena had explained it all, the treatments and how much they hurt Lex. she had expected that kind of passion from her sister, but Alex was defending her.

“I um.... well I just want you to be safe as much as you want me to be but I guess we can’t always agree on everything.”

Kara was a little upset that she was so hard on Lena when she seemed to defend Lex it made no sense to her at all, Lex was a murderer, on any of the multiverses, yes she was different to the original Lex of this world but she had tried to kill Clark more than once, but Alex was suddenly cheering for team Lex. She listened to her statement, she intrigues her, Kara couldn't help but wonder if there was an attraction there? The level of interest and the way she was defending her Kara couldn't help but think there was more to it. 

“Just remember she is very manipulative and watch your back please Alex, I can’t lose you”

Alex could tell that there was more than Kara was letting on, she knew more, but she wasn't going to tell her, clearly this was something that was shared by Lena that she wasn't ready to share, so maybe she wanted to get Lena’s permission before doing so. It was interesting, they seemed to be closer in this world, maybe the alternate Lena wasn't as bad, if it engendered this level of loyalty from Kara. She was giving her a warning but at the same time she could see there was a softness about her thoughts of Lex. It was curious something that Lena had told Kara had both softened her and worried her. She checked her watch, Kara needed to go soon and she didn't want to end the meeting this way.

“You are not going to lose me Kara, there is no way that I would let that happen. We will work this all out and remember we are stronger together, if that means we are increasing our number to include Nia, Brainy and even Lena then that is alright with me, because you are my sister and we are unbreakable. I love you Kara, it will take time, but Lena is what you chose, I will get there, I just need time until then it will be, well not comfortable maybe but it will be alright.”

She stood and hugged her tightly. She wanted them to continue being there for each other. They separated and Kara made her way off to Catco, Alex returned to her apartment to continue working.

Lena’s Lab (National City) 03-16-2020 Earth Prime 20:30………

Lena was already in the lab when she arrived, she had been held up by a rogue alien, she couldn't help but think that there was something in her earlier thoughts about how nice it had been to have uninterrupted time with her that called this latest issue. She had been given a new contract too at the DEO which took time after the take down. Everything seemed hell bent on stopping her getting to Lena today. Although now it was finished she had grabbed some basic food for dinner, she was hungry even if Lena had eaten she needed something after the fight, and well after care seemed a little off there was no sun lamps just a little check over and on her way. She arrived at the lab and smiled, greeting Lena. sharing an elongated hug and a very passionate kiss that almost made Kara forget that they haven't eaten. Sitting down the pair ate, swapping small talk about their work day as they did so. 

“Ok well if we are done eating do you want to show me what you're working on? Let me see that beautiful Luthor brain in all its glory, you know you are very intelligent even by kryptonian standards”

“Well I wasn’t doing Calculus in fourth grade, but by Earth standards, I’m pretty smart,” she says with a light laugh. She stood and offered her hand to Kara. Let me show you what I have laid out so far. I figured we could start by seeing where the current technologies fail. What do you think?” 

Lena emphasized her question by giving Kara’s hand a quick squeeze. The scientist knew it was the perfect place to start but she wanted the blonde’s input every step of the way.

Kara looked at her, she was more than just pretty smart, by any standard, she took the offered hand and stepped into Lena’s space, enjoying the way her body tingled in excitement at their proximity. She smiled at the suggestion and leaned in giving her a small chaste kiss and squeezing the hand she had refused to drop. She was sure that whatever Lena did would be an amazing advancement, and anything that she could do to help her was more than worth the time, especially when it came with kisses from Lena. She couldn't help but think that maybe her presence was slowing the CEO from making progress but at the same time, maybe her insight would help, after all the human advancements were not close to the Kryptonian.

“Well if there is a way to correct a failure instead of starting completely afresh it would save time, on the other hand cataloguing all the areas that have gone wrong will help guide a completely new project, already knowing the pitfalls” 

Kara took off her glasses and tied up her hair ready to work. She didn't even think about it, after all she didn't need the glasses and her hair was in the way but this was very much her, the real Kara Zor-El. She was sharing exactly who she was with the woman she loved, and that was a beautiful thing.

Lena was already smiling at Kara’s concise interpretation of their starting point and as she watched her pin up her hair, she was mesmerized. This was going to be a long night but she wouldn’t have it any other way. This was a different look for her, she had Kara’s hair with no glasses, it was beautiful and simple, and Lena realized this was her, this was the real her and she couldn't help but smile as she observed her. They worked for a number of hours, making alterations and creating possibilities together, Kara was amazing and Lena couldn't help admire the hidden depths of her now on display, it was like getting a first glimpse of her, of the real her and Lena loved her even more. From the evaluations they already had a few possibilities for the gel pack contaminants, the cases to hold the hypothetical gel. They had also managed to uncover an additional transfer that they couldn't explain. It was getting late though so Lena placed her hand on Kara’s forearm and smiled at her.

“We have done enough for today, and tomorrow after work we have a big day, I have moved things to finish at four, if you meet me here we can go shopping, I can't wait to see what we find for you, Saturday should be well fun, now that I have you coming with me.”

Kara looked at her, their first date would be something indeed, she was more than happy to go with her. She couldn't wait to get to show Lena off as her date, then she thought of a date tomorrow, she wondered if Lex had mentioned it to Lena. she wondered about the connection between them, she understood that Lex didn't make connections the same, but she loved Lena and well that relationship meant a lot to her, Lena had spoken so fondly of her connection to Lex, how she made the effort to connect with Lena and how much that meant. Alex was someone who fell hard and fast when she did, but she wasn't sure that Lex would return that. She wasn't sure but Alex had defended Lex and the way she spoke with a small smile on her face made Kara think that this was more than just recon.

“You know that Alex was late yesterday? Well she told me earlier she had breakfast with Lex, and well they are going to dinner tomorrow.”

“Lex did mention it, I think she might like Alex, but I am not sure, Lex isn't always easy to read, it seems that there is a connection between us Luthor’s with you extraordinary Danvers woman.”


	20. Dress for a date

Luthor Corp (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 16:00………

Kara has loved working with Lena, pitting her mind to good use, casual touches and stolen kisses. She had loved every moment for it. She was looking forward to this afternoon although she was nervous. She knew that everyone seemed to have a thing for her muscles, but she thought her body was too manly. Lena on the other hand had an amazing womanly shape, all soft and beautiful. She wouldn’t mind a glimpse, she bit her lip as she landed in the alley behind Luthor Corp it was time to meet Lena. She went up to the office and knocked lightly before entering.

“Are you ready, beautiful?”

Lena would never tire of this; Kara’s sweet voice, her loving words aimed at the brunette only, the softness in her eyes when their gazes met. It was heaven. Lena leaned in to place a soft kiss on her girlfriend’s lips. She’d seen her just last night but oh how she’d missed her. She was excited but nervous about today the thought of seeing Kara in those beautiful dresses, she couldn't help but wonder if there was a nice suit that she would get her in too, after all, Kara had the height and the bone structure to look beautiful and graceful yet powerful in one.

“Yes, darling. All set, our chariot awaits,”

She replied as she stood and walked directly toward the blonde. She said quietly, glad to be skipping their lab work this evening. In favor of a nice evening shopping and watching Kara in many different beautiful things, then a cozy dinner, she had planned to take Kara home and have a nice evening with no work.

Kara’s breath came faster and her heart beat out of her chest, how did Lena have this effect still she only saw her a few hours ago, she thought that when they finally got together this would stop but it didn’t. She moved towards the smiling CEO and kissed her back. She smiled and placed her arm around her and guided her out.

“I will never get tired of that, being able to kiss you, So where are we going to go? Do I need a mortgage to pay for it? you know we could go to Paris or Milan or something if you wanted”

Kara laughed lightly and pressed the button for the elevator, and smiled at her. Lena had indicated she felt safe flying with her; maybe she would be happy to fly somewhere else for a date one day. She grinned cheekily. Kara smiled softly at her, she was more than happy to spend a little money on an outfit fit for a date with Lena.

It isn’t until after the warmth of Kara’s touch settles against her that she realized how effortlessly the blonde had reached for and held her. It’s almost enough to make Lena a bit emotional. She moved into the embrace a little and stepped inside pressing the button for the underground parking. She placed her hand into that of Kara, the warmth feeding through her warming her soul, through the casual touch.

“You won’t need a mortgage, no, we don't need to go to Paris or somewhere else there are plenty of amazing designers up town, not only that I have booked a location that will stay open late for us. I am sure there is something perfect here, not that it needs to be spectacular as you will be wearing it, and you are spectacular yourself. It is also possible to find something to compliment yourself.”

She held the hand that was gingerly put in hers and squeezed a little before threading her fingers through the long slender fingers of the CEO, the action drawing attention to them, Kara’s creeping blush was intensified from her thoughts and Lena’s compliment. On Krypton she was just the same as everyone else average, Lena was stunning and Kara loved the way her figure was so womanly.

“Pfft no Lena I am average, and I can’t have you buy something in my price range you're Lena Luthor, people expect you to be wearing a one off gown by a fancy designer to these events, no one will be looking at me. Since my new suit I have destroyed less clothes so I have some budget for clothing, I could spend 3 or maybe 4 hundred on it, although I will have to wear it more than once I suppose”

“Well, you’re forgetting one important thing Miss Danvers, Lena Luthor doesn’t care what others expect from her, she makes her own way. Especially if she gets to walk into an event on the arm of the most beautiful woman she knows.”

Lena says with a crooked grin, one reserved only for the blonde. By the gods does Lena mean 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒇𝒖𝒍. Not just her outward appearance, but everything Kara Danvers is from the inside out. She was always amazed by Kara and everything about her continued to shine like a star, even the simple change with the glasses and ponytail had stolen her breath for a moment. They slipped into the car and it pulled away. As the car takes them closer to their destination, Lena begins to imagine the different options Kara might try on and how gorgeous she’d look in even the simplest garments. She’s reminded of the blonde in sweats and a t-shirt and the effortless way casual material sits on every curve.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure we can find something versatile that you can wear a few times. Next time, when we know about an event more in advance, we can always have something custom made. I know several up and coming designers that would love the chance to do so. Won’t need to go anywhere but downtown. We have perfectly lovely designer selections at our fingertips. For today though you tell me a price range you’re comfortable in, and we’ll stick to that. After all, if I look good in a paper bag, heaven knows you’d look like a goddess in one too,” 

Kara smiled softly at her, she was more than happy to spend a little money on an outfit fit for a date with Lena. She held the hand that was gingerly put in hers and squeezed a little before threading her fingers through the long slender fingers of the CEO, the action drawing attention to them, Kara’s creeping blush was intensified from her thoughts and Lena’s compliment. Kara blushes lightly, she couldn’t understand how the raven goddess stood before her and talked about herself in such a deprecating way but revered her with such reverence and awe. She gazed at her and placed her hand to her cheek.

“Thank you lena, but compared to you I am just average, my body is aided by genetics, from the matrix and sustained by the sun, everyone looked like me on krypton, different color, maybe but generally all the same, you however. You are the most stunning thing I have ever seen, your physical beauty only outmatched by the beauty of your heart and soul”

She sat back listening for a moment. She didn’t think that anyone would partially want nobody wearing their designs, she may have a Pulitzer under her belt but she was just a reporter. However designing for the CEO, the youngest female, most influential, the 30 under 30, the top on the Forbes. That would be something that would get their name out there and boost their career.

“Maybe if you have someone willing to design for you they would make us a matching set, a complimentary duo for the next event?”

The car stopped and Kara got out, a small burst of speed to open Lena’s door and hold out her hand.

“M’lady”

Lena supposes they can go on and on like this all afternoon, each claiming how the other was ‘better’ in so many ways. But the truth was, no matter how modest Kara insisted on being, the things that made her unique to Lena had nothing to do with Kryptonian genetics. The brunette loved Kara for the things that made her human; her kindness, her persistence, her loyalty, her generosity, her spirit, her stubbornness, her natural beauty first thing in the morning adorned with nothing but a sleepy smile. Most importantly to Lena, the 𝒘𝒂𝒚 she loved. Kara’s heart was capable of giving so much love to those she cared about. That was no exaggeration of the truth, it was a fact. Lena turned her face slightly to place a gentle kiss on the palm that rested on her cheek. 

“Most stunning?” 

She teases playfully with another raised brow, but she takes the compliment reluctantly for fear of succumbing to tears at just how much the brunette adored the journalist. She’d spend the rest of her years proving it. She stepped out of the car still holding Kara’s hand and smiled softly. She gazed at her and placed her hand to her cheek.

“I actually know a number of designers that would love that opportunity not to mention the boost it would give to their new label. Some very talented people on the fringe of the industry, yet to be discovered.”

The soft look on Lena’s face and the way she turned her face and kissed her palm made Kara’s heart skip a beat the way people saw her as cold kara would never understand; then this was in private and Lena was always soft with her.

“Mmmmm complimentary designs, Ying and yang perfect balance”

Being led in the shop Kara’s eyes filled with wonder at the clothes and her mouth dropped a little. The items were so beautiful, she could see Lena in all of it looking beautiful in her splendor. Kara was bouncing a little excited about picking things that would make Lena look like a goddess. She looked at her with puppy eyes as she waited for her response scanning the store for beautiful options for her, she wondered if Lena would consider an alternative way of shopping and looked at her with a big grin and puppy eyes.

“I have an idea how about we pick things for each other to try, and then see how it looks, I know you look good in suits and dresses so I’ll pick a little of each, you can find different things for me, you know more about this than me”

Kara’s giddiness was absolutely adorable and Lena reached out to take one of her hands. It was a brilliant idea and the brunette was pleasantly surprised at the alternative strategy. They knew each other so well by now, their little exercise might be fun and produce interesting results.

“I think that’s a perfect idea, darling,” she said as she pulled her in for a quick kiss. Twenty minutes then we meet back in the dressing rooms?” 

A minute later, she was drawn first to a flowy white dress fit for a queen. She imagined how the fabric would rest against the blonde’s strong lithe frame and pulled the right size of the rack. She repeated this with various styles and colors of dresses then stopped dead in her tracks. In front of her, on a mannequin, was a deep blue grey suit that commanded silent but absolute authority. The CEO nearly swooned imagining Kara Danvers walking into a room wearing it. Good gods. Her knees went weak and her mouth was suddenly dry and when had it suddenly become so hot in the store?! 

Kara felt like a kid in a candy store so many beautiful things she rushed around probably a little too fast looking at everything. Each item was considered, how it felt against her skin, the shade and color against the creamy skin of her girlfriend. She chuckled as she thought of that, Lena Freaking Luthor was her girlfriend!! Something to bring out her beautiful eyes and contrast against her dark hair, pale skin and signature red kissable lips. Her hand moved to her own lips remembering for a moment the kisses. She imagined Lena in everything she looked at and the clothes that made the cut all left her breathless. It wasn’t just dresses. She had a few suits too so Lena looked so amazing in a suit so she picked up two. She flirted about and headed into the dressing room placing the items on a rack for Lena.

Twenty seven minutes later, Lena finally made it back to the dressing room. “Ready?” She asked the blonde, not 𝒂𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒍 flustered or sweating.

“I have everything ready for you to try on, I think they will all look amazing, I may have gone over budget on a couple but I couldn’t resist, the emerald dress and the three piece suit are both beautiful and practically made for you”

Kara gushed as Lena finally made it in. she had been ready for a while, but she may have cheated but she didn't mind waiting for Lena, as everything her excitement only grew with anticipation and she couldn't wait to see Lena in some of these things. It was only five thirty and they had a while before they had to be out, not that Kara thought that the shop would turn away Lena.

Lena smiled, having forgotten about price. She’d picked each piece solely based on Kara and her beautiful form and features. They could sort those details out later. It was the CEO’s turn to barely contain her excitement. She wasn’t sure what she looked forward to more; trying on what Kara picked out for her or seeing her girlfriend in everything she’d in turn picked for her. 

“Let’s get to it then, shall we? One at a time until we narrow it down?”

Goodness, that could take them hours. Two women with two different but exquisite tastes? But Lena had nowhere else to be and she’d happily spend hours playing dress up with the blonde. Her hand gently ran over the material of each outfit that hung for her on the rack. It’s not until she begins to study them that she sees the hidden intimacy of what they’re about to do. Years of friendship, through good and bad and 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 bad, had bonded them in more ways than couples who’ve spent half their lives together. Each choice Kara made for her was completely her own, without any input from the CEO. And yet, they were things Lena might very well have picked had she been shopping completely alone. Lena Luthor and Kara Danvers were 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒅 and the brunette will always regret not seeing it sooner.

“Kara, these are lovely...”

While Lena looked at the items picked by her she moved to the selection from Lena. They were all beautiful and exquisite, Lenas taste could not be faulted in any respect. She blushed lightly at some of the more revealing dresses. Not one was something she would pick, not because she didn’t want to but because they were designed to be noticed. Kara craved wearing beautiful things and going places with Lena and complimenting her instead of shrinking into the background. She bit her lip Lena had crawled into her desires and given her a selection of gowns that reflected them.

“They will compliment you, and look amazing, and these Lena, they are like something out of a dream, I am not sure I will blend in with them, but Rao they are beautiful”

Lena turned, brows slightly furrowed but there was still nothing but admiration in her expression. She didn't think that Kara could blend in anywhere, she was always the person that caught Lena’s eye without any attempt to do so, no matter how she tried to hide in any given location Lena was always drawn to her. Her eyes seek out the bright smile and the amazing otherworldly eyes that shine so brightly.

“Darling... they’re not meant for you to blend in. They’re meant to radiate who you are. When we walk into that room together, I want everyone to see what I see. To see Kara Danvers light up the entire space in just a few elegant strides. I want them to see that understated brand of confidence that is all your own. To see kindness, strength, and intelligence all sculpted into one breathtaking form.”

The brunette brought her hands to Kara’s cheeks, searching her eyes for some understanding or acceptance of what she was telling her. Lena leaned in to place a soft kiss on her lips before whispering.

“Kara, you’re not the sun. You’re the entire galaxy... too bright to hover in shadows.”

Kara listened to what Lena was saying and a small but distinct smile spread across her face. She couldn’t agree with the things she was saying about her, she didn’t have that high an ego, but the message was clear, she didn’t have to hold back or hide for Lena. She pressed into the hands on her cheeks and looked into those loving emerald eyes, her own misting slightly as she spoke. When Lena was finished she gave her a small chaste kiss and rested her head on Lena’s.

“I’m not used to people wanting all of me Lena, this may take a little getting used to.”

Back to the task at hand, Lena picks one of the lighter colored dresses. She held it up in the front of herself as she looked into the tall dressing mirror. With a satisfied smile, Lena begins taking off her current set of clothes. At first, she’s too busy with her own tasks to notice just how far ahead of her Kara was.

Kara had smiled and moved back to the clothes picking a dress that was definitely going to get her noticed and started to change. She could hear Lena taking a dress out and starting to change herself. She couldn’t zip it up and was standing holding the soft fabric over herself. She would need Lena’s help, she made a number of failed attempts before she finally gave in.

“Um Lena could you just help”

At the request, Lena turns to see the blonde’s back facing her. Her breath catches. Perhaps she hadn’t thought this entire process through because now, displayed before her, is a chiseled muscular back that was the perfect balance of stone and femininity. Half undressed, the CEO steps forward and reaches for the hidden zipper of the outfit. She tugs on it gently as it follows the path up Kara’s back. In the short time span, Lena’s body had forgotten how to breathe. She stepped close enough that she was just able to look over Kara’s shoulder at her reflection in the large dressing mirror.

“Beautiful,” she whispers when her lungs finally fill with air again.

Lena’s hands seemed to shake as she started to zip her up, Kara could hear the beating of her heart and the way she held her breath. Each mm of the zip that fastened was a mm of skin set alight by the way Lena’s long slender fingers brushed against her bare back. Kara couldn’t help the soft moan at the tantalizing feeling of Lena touching her bare skin. She looked in the mirror and bit her lip, lenas face in the mirror so beautiful and focused. When she spoke Kara was pulled from her reverence and turned slowly, for the first time seeing that Lena was not fully dressed. It was her turn to hold her breath as she took in the sight and a light pink dusting took root on her cheeks.

“Your not.. Um you haven’t finished, I ...l”

Kara’s mind faltered Lena’s body now less of a dream image more real and more beautiful than she even imagined. Kara swallowed hard realising she had turned into Lena and she was now so close she was almost pressed into her. Lena’s skin soft and cool pressing against her, she couldn't stop thinking about how it would feel to run her fingers over her skin. She blushed and spoke with a shaky voice.

“I... do you want to finish so I can see what you picked”

As Kara turned around, Lena’s eyes lifted to meet hers. It would seem they were both flustered. It made the CEO’s heart beat out of time. The brunette turned and stepped back toward her rack of clothes and dressing mirror. She was now hyper aware that she would have to complete the outfit change with an audience of one. Somewhere, heavens knows where from, but from somewhere, Lena regains her poise and confidence. Knowing Kara’s eyes are on here, she slips into the snug dress then turns toward the dressing mirror. She takes a minute or so to adjust herself and make sure that everything is in its place. She turns left, then right, then once more so she can try to see her own back in the mirror. ‘Don’t fall on your ass, Luthor,’ she thinks to herself as she finally turns to face Kara with a questioning smile. Lena takes a few steps toward her girlfriend. 

“What do you think of option 1?”

Kara watched as Lena moved away she had to remind her what they were doing. The proximity to Lena was causing her to have thoughts that they hadn’t discussed yet and well, she didn’t want to push her. She stood trying not to stare but wherever she looked lenas reflection was in a mirror and her own reddened face. Finally Lena was done and she looked up at her words.

“Oh by Rao’s light, you look amazing Lena”

She moved forward and turned her straightening the dress and laying it against her cream skin fussing until it was perfect, she pulled her hair around the shoulders to show them off and then stood back. Some how focusing on the task helped her stop her mind drifting to other areas,

“That really looks amazing on you although I think it could do with being taken in a little, how do you feel in it?”

Lena hummed as Kara’s fingers worked delicately to fix little things on the dress. She glanced at the mirrors around them and wondered how they would look together. Lena pulled Kara to her side and linked their right and left arms, as though she were escorting her girlfriend into a grand room. Gods in heaven or anywhere else in the universe they dwelled, Kara was beautiful... As much as the brunette despised organized religion, Lena would send them a prayer of thanks everyday for putting her in her path. Together they looked complimentary, in sync, and something about being stood next to Kara in these dresses made Lena feel lucky and beautiful.

“Hm. It feels comfortable. I suppose it could use a slight adjustment, Should we put these in the ‘maybe’ category?”

Kara’s breath hitch slightly as she was confronted by the two of them standing together, the dresses looked nice but there was a definite sparkle in Lena's eyes, she smiled back to her.

“Well I think they are nice for the maybe pile”

Kara bit her lip wondering what to try on next. There was a specific dress she wanted to see Lena in and wondered. She moved to Lena’s rack and ran her fingers over the green dress. She really wanted to see Lena in it, Lena had never denied her a simple request.

“Hum would you like to pick the next option? Is there something you would like to see next? I would love to see you in this”

Lena turned toward Kara again, knowing they had several other outfits to try. She noticed the slightly shy way in which she was talking. She bit her lip and looked at her, Lena figured that Kara had a particular interest in this dress. Clearly this was something that Kara wanted to see her in, and she was more than happy to play dress up for her.

“Yes, I’ll pick something for you,” 

She said while the blonde went to Lena’s rack of clothes. Honestly, the CEO could see Kara in any of these. That first outfit had already made her look so lovely. Lena bit her lip, still thinking of the suit, but she decided to leave that one for last. Instead, Lena selected a lavender dress. She’d always loved the way Kara could pull off that shade and kill it every time. She held up a dress and turned to Kara, Her eyes landed on the green dress the blonde held up and smiled widely. She loved that color. Lena stepped forward to exchange garments with her.

“This one I think,” 

Alex’s Flat (National City) 17-03-2019 Earth Prime 17:30………

Alex had worked most of the day but the closer it got to the time she would need to leave to meet Lex the more anxious she became, would this be a date, an actual date? She had eventually admitted that she had meant it that way, but Lex had not taken it that way. She still had the invite thought. She started to look at the restaurant that they would be eating in and her heart skyrocketed. This was no ordinary place, this was high class, only celebrities and the very top of the National City elite ate here. She could understand why Lex would be allowed entrance but her god this was not somewhere that she would be permitted to enter, let alone afford to eat at. She looked at the press picture, the evening we looked more like a red carpet event, and here she sat in jeans and a hoodie. She would have called Kara but she knew that she was out with Lena, it wasn't normal for Alex to be the one having a bout of gay panic, but she understood more now why Kara was always such a mess before meeting Lena for one of the Gala’s.

She looked through her wardrobe, there was nothing, not a single outfit that would fit the bill for such an evening, she wondered what the hell she was going to do, she wanted to meet with Lex. there was more than a curiosity, more than a need to protect Kara, she had been lingering on thoughts of her since their first meeting. She needed help, no Kara, and Nia would not be someone that would make too much of this. She picked up her phone and dialed the one person that she thought could help and would ask very few questions.

“Vasquez, its Danvers, I need assistance, I need a dress suitable for CharMichaels, and I have to be there at seven, I am going to shower and get ready can you be here by six fifteen with something appropriate?”

“I gotcha Danvers, that little Black number is still at the DEO, it's a knockout, It will go out for dry cleaning and be with you in time.”


	21. Innocence revealed

Angelique's Boutique (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:00………

Kara looked at the dress she wouldn’t need help to zip up the back, because it didn’t have one. She swallowed hard. She turned it to see the neckline was also low and then split up the side she wondered if there was any point in making the dress the only thing covered was her abs. She moved into the dressing room and started to change. She was done fairly quickly but waited for Lena to call her. She was nervous this dress was revealing but she was more anxious to see Lena in the stunning emerald dress. Her heart was beating out of her chest.

“Ok that is um wow it’s a dress to be noticed for sure”

Lena took a bit longer to get out of one outfit and into the other. She continued to spare glances in Kara’s direction. When she turned toward her, Lena was trying to work on a zipper of her own. This one was a side zipper so she was confident she could take care of it on her own, even if it took a little longer than she thought. Kara’s words drew her attention back up. Lena’s heart stopped in her chest. She was caught in a strange moment of wanting to cover Kara with a blanket so that no one else could see all the bare skin, and conversely wanting to... devour her.

“Um, it’s not so bad, It might just take some getting used to, but you look absolutely gorgeous.”

The CEO said as she approached and then cleared her throat. A bright smile stretching across her face, the dress was daring and beautiful, and well it showed more of Kara than Lena had ever seen before she felt like a starving man at a feast. Lena stepped forward again until she was close enough to tame a stray golden lock behind a strong shoulder.

As Lena approached the emerald dress shimmered the light reflecting off the shiny material making her eyes shine in a way Kara has never seen she swallowed hard as the raven beauty moved towards her elegantly like she was gliding on air.

“For the price you would think that it would have more material”

Kara tried to joke as she stepped forward, her leg slipping through the split that she ended to reach her hip. Her breath caught at Lena’s fingers brushing over her skin to move the hair.

“Rao that dress is so beautiful Lena, you look perfect and your eyes are glowing”

She moved in the dress to spin and took Lena’s hand turning her slowly. Kara watched mesmerised, knowing that this would be something that she could so Saturday, spin her hold her close. There was always something so intimate in dancing, and she couldn't wait to do that with Lena. She spoke to her the statement was strange as Kara’s own mouth felt like the desert and the words rasped.

“It’s exquisite even if you don’t wear it to the gala you should get this one it, mouthwatering”

Lena turned at Kara’s direction to do so, hands gently clasped together with enough ease to move. The way Kara admired her and what she saw made Lena feel so many things all at once. That she could capture the Kryptonian’s attention in such a way made her feel like the luckiest woman alive.

“Thank you,” 

She replies to the blonde’s praises before stepping in close for yet another kiss. Desire traipsed through her and she fought against the urge to remove Kara’s dress for her in order to try on the next outfit. But she kept her hands to herself. Mostly. She whispered with a crooked smirk regarding her own dress. Although Kara seemed uneasy with how much it revealed.

“I’ll take it, if only to see you look at me that way again, If you don’t like this dress, let’s have you try on another,” 

Kara smiled softly as she gazed at Lena. The dress was truly something. She returned the kiss so tender and sweet, she was feeling a desire for Lena that was verging on lust and she needed to shake it off, they were not there yet.

“Well any time you wear this I will look at you like this, the reason I look at you like this is because you look unbelievable”

She bit her lip and looked at Lena, a small blush playing on her cheeks, it wasn’t that she didn’t like the dress. She bit her lip. It wasn't a custom on earth as much but she couldn’t get the thought of others seeing parts of her that she would only give to Lena. She picked up another dress, this one was blue.

“Lena I have no problem standing here naked in front of you, it is not modesty that is causing the issue with this dress, you are my Zhao, and as such some things are reserved for your eyes only, this dress is showing things that are for you only. Wait one moment”

She stripped and put on the next dress standing next to Lena. to look at them both in the complimentary colours, highlighting both their eyes, and making them shine.

“Alex said that blue this sapphire color brings out my eyes”

Holy Christ. Kara’s words were innocent enough, explanatory almost as she revealed more about what being Kara’s Zhao meant. She made a mental note and Lena hoped the blonde knew there were things about herself as well that she only reserved for the Kryptonian; not just the physical but also the damaged fragile parts that she normally kept under lock and key from the rest of the world. Kara was gone from her arms much too quickly for her liking but the moments that followed were not without their perks. Lena was going to have to find a way to tamp down her desire for Kara. This wasn’t the time or the place and with everything still so fresh, too soon perhaps. As Kara had done with her, Lena now reached out a hand to turn Kara around. 

“Your sister would be absolutely correct, That dress, Miss Danvers, was made for you. There are parts of me that I only share with you too Kara. I’m quickly running out of adjectives I know, but Kara, this color not only brings out your eyes, but your entire personality. You’re gorgeous, darling.”

Kara came back and smiled as Lena’s heart rate increased. She twirled happily for her; the one shoulder dress hinted at her form without exposing her and the missing fabric in the small of her back would give Lena access to her skin when dancing. She giggled lightly as she spun and she felt like a princess in the dress.

“Lena I will always accept all of you that you are willing to share with me, in return I will share all I am with you”

This time it was Kara to lean in and kiss her, her hands cupping her face as she kissed her lips. She moved her hands over her back and lifted her off the floor a little spinning them both. She smiled and nestled her head in the luthors dark locks breathing her in.

“I think these to are a wonderful compliment to each other, and well I don’t need fancy words Lena, your heart tells me what you like”

“Maybe we should try the suits I see you and I both picked one out. Yes, my heart sees something it very much likes”

Lena melted into the kiss, momentarily resting her hands on Kara’s waist. She giggled lightly as she was lifted and twirled around, every movement effortless, normally Kara had a clumsy feel but like this she was graceful. She replied with a laugh as she pulled away. Ah yes, the suit. If the Kryptonian was going to be listening to her heart for answers, she might only get half the story when she sees Kara in the suit. Something told her she was going to need some water soon. She was anticipating the growing embers in her abdomen to become a fully fledged forest fire at the sight of her in a suit. Lena moved back over to her rack of clothes and disrobed. The suit Kara had picked out was a deep shade of red, nearly a mix of red and black.

“I’ll take this dress for sure. But yes, let’s go with the suits next.”

Kara has put the blue dress to one side, she would be paying for it for a while but it would be worth it, she knew it. She pulled out the white suit with black roses; it was an interesting mix of masculinity and femininity that was striking and very bold. She started to put the pants on and then the shirt with the jacket and pulled it straight. She took a deep breath. It was a lovely suit and she liked the way it was tailored, she realised she was stalling, if lena was in that suit she could have a heart attack, she thinks it’s possible. She slips out and can see the back of Lena. The suit was cut amazingly and accentuated her curves, it was powerful and stunning she held her breath as she turned. Kara’s mouth just dropped, she could see the power, the confidence and the presence of Lena in all her glory.

“Oh my Rao, you can take me home”

A few minutes after she had managed to get herself into the suit and was taken in front of the mirror, she didn't dare to look up when she heard Kara come out but in her voice she knew her time to compose herself was up. She turned toward the blonde, bracing herself in case her heart or lungs or both gave out. 

“Regardless of what we wear to the gala you in a suit is commanding in a very exciting way.”

Lena tried to display her normal hard-edged no nonsense business persona as she let the blonde take her in. But this was completely covering up the fact that she could die happily of heart failure at this moment. Her jaw dropped as she took in the sight of Kara in that suit. 

“I- You— um...”

A genius with the inability to form a sentence, that’s what Lena was right now.

“Y- you should take the suit. Actually... um... better yet, I’m buying it for you.”

It would only be right, seeing as the CEO would likely ruin it trying to rip it off the blonde. Or worse, make her keep it on while the brunette gave in to her desire and ravished her. Either scenario worked in Lena’s mind. She smirked and nodded, willing to take Kara home this instant if that was her true wish. 𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 was Kara swagger and she wanted this Kara in the worst ways, she always wanted her but by the gods this look was devastatingly beautiful.

“That suit... brings out a side of you, that in all these years, I’ve never seen. You’re... power and calm all wrapped into a picture of perfection.”

The way Lena's heart was frantically beating and skipping had Kara worried, she moved closer to her and ran her hands over her shoulders. She thought about stripping it off but she wasn’t sure naked was the right move at the moment, she was finding it hard to keep her thoughts clean and proper with Lena looking like that. She decided that stripping would be bad, and counter productive so she just looked into her eyes and smiled softly. She spoke softly but tried a joke hoping that would take some pressure off.

“Lena I can tell you really like this, and I do to it’s very me, both girly and pretty with a strong side and I love it, I can tell you do too but I am going to need you to try and breath, Not for the gala I think lena, you will be expected to form sentences and walk without assistance”

Lena cleared her throat, obviously busted. Maybe it was a tad unfair that Kara could hear her erratic heartbeat and figure out that the brunette was a mess. But she wasn’t ashamed of how she felt. She made no promises of where her hands or eyes might be, though. Once again, Lena moved in for a kiss, but this one was not chaste or soft. It was fueled by her passion, making the kiss deep right from the start. Long moments later, she pulled away, somewhat breathless.

“Actually, if you do wear that to the gala, I promise to keep my wits about me. I think we’re done here, Unless you have your heart set on trying on your last dress?”

Kara smiled at her; her face had taken on a wide and happy look, all smiles and bright eyes, she was so happy that Lena returned her affection and started to feel like her own desires were reflected in the raven haired woman.

“Well you have seen the choices here so if you want me to wear the suit I would be happy too”

Kara found her arms full of Lena and the kiss was full of passion, her hands roaming over the curves of Lena’s hips and down to her sexy ass. The kiss was unbelievable and her body was reacting to it automatically. She started to worry that she would make a mess of the suit so as Lena pulled back, as much as she wanted to continue she knew it was not the place.

“I think that we are done Lena, I am not sure continuing down this line would possibly get us banned from here! You really are irresistible Lena Luthor. Let me clear this all up and we can go”

Kara’s arms around her made everything else drown away around them. She felt safe and warm, and loved. The CEO struggled on the inside, both wanting more and feeling as though she wasn’t deserving of it. But she wasn’t going to push it away either; she’d done that long enough. In the next moment after pulling away, Lena laughed lightly. She didn’t think they’d be banned but she understood her point. They seemed like a couple of lovesick teenagers.

“Let me just get changed and we can go.”

Kara sped around and changed putting the blue green dress and the suit in one pile and everything else on the return rack. Giving Lena time to change and keeping her busy so she wasn’t watching she didn’t think she could restrain herself if she did. She was finished with the clothes all ready in their piles and waited for Lena. She looked up and saw her looking in the mirror.

It took her a few minutes to get back into her own outfit. In her reflection, she noticed her cheeks still had a shade of pink from their kiss. The brunette grinned at herself then picked up the emerald dress and the suit. Lena slipped the Lavender dress into her pile, if Kara would only wear it with her Zhau then it was something that Lena could enjoy, it had been an amazing dress. She noticed that Kara was very fidgety and raised her perfectly sculpted brow. If Lena didn’t know any better, the fidgeting in Kara alluded to anxiety, which meant something was on her mind.

“Is everything alright? Are you sure you don’t want me to pay for those? I invited you to the event after all.”

Kara looked up at Lena, it was nothing to do with money, she didn’t have a concern about that, she held onto Lena’s arm keeping her in the changing room. She swallowed she wasn’t sure that this was what she should be talking about but she didn’t want to hold back from Lena after all she had promised no more lies.

“Lena I can afford it, it’s amazing how much money you can save when you don’t destroy three or four outfits a day, I mean I have even put on a little weight being able to buy more food and you know how much I love food. I don’t want to ever be someone who takes advantage of you lena, just because you can afford it doesn’t mean that you should, you invited me for the date you don’t have to pay and I’m honestly I wish that was what was wrong”

Oh Rao help her, she didn’t want to tell Lena what was going on in her but she needed to, Lena was her Zhao and that meant everything.

“All this time, all this intimacy, working in the lab, being able to hold you, kiss you and seeing you in those clothes, it’s made me feel Um... well I am more aroused than I knew was possible I’m sorry, please don’t think that is all I think about or want lena it isn’t I promise but it just caught me unaware I have never felt it before”

As she rambled her skin flushed redder and redder until she was practically glowing, she could feel her arousal, her embarrassment poignantly throughout her body she lowered her voice before the final admission.

“it’s not that I didn’t know it could happen it just never has before”

Lena’s arm was warm where Kara held her forearm. At first she thinks they’re going to kiss again but the blonde’s expression is too serious.

“What? Put on a little weight? I can’t tell—...”

Her voice trails off as she looks down and tries to step back to get a better look at her. Oh. Maybe the weight was in her muscles. Her throat was dry again as she considered asking her girlfriend to flex. As proof of this weight gain. But Kara continues her ramble and Lena tries to pay closer attention. Now the Kryptonian has stopped talking and Lena’s eyes widen. She’s muted for a moment for a plethora of reasons. Thankfully, her brain collects itself and her index finger comes up and gently presses against Kara’s lips when it looks like she might say more.

“I know that’s not all you think about,” she began quietly. “You’re always so attentive and we have long science conversations like the pair of nerds we are. I... have been feeling the same way. Since that first night in the lab this week. Sometimes I can hardly breathe. I’ve never felt anything like it before either. I feel like if I don’t control it, it might consume me alive,” she whispered as she held Kara’s gaze.

Kara was about to start again. She had more to say she wanted to explain but Lena’s finger tip on her lips silenced her. She raised her eyes a little to look at Lena, she was not sure what Lena got from her ramble but she hoped that she was understanding her. She smiled at her girlfriend and she seemed to understand that she wasn’t just after her money or her body. Her eyes widened a little at Lena’s admission and bit her lip, she was happy that she wasn’t alone in this. Although there was one more thing that she needed to tell her.

“Zhao I... I haven’t given what is yours, to anyone, I never felt like this about anyone with anyone, I know that it is because of what you mean to me. I don’t want to do anything that makes you think I can’t control myself, I am just struggling a little at the moment”

Lena’s hand now rested at the nape of Kara’s neck. She smiled at the sweet words. This honesty thing was working for them. It made her heart all the more full. Lena left the meaning of the unsaid words hanging between them. She thought Kara had been in a relationship before, so she was somewhat confused.  
If the blonde 𝒉𝒂𝒅𝒏'𝒕 been with anyone sexually, then what was happening between them was all the more important. Lena loved Kara fiercely and she wanted to show her that with more than just words. The brunette bit her lips athen took a breath before replying. 

“I’m struggling a little with it too. You’ve never...? With anyone?”

Kara looked at her and the feeling of her hand in the nape of her neck was comforting and made her focus on the other woman. She bit her lip and took a deep breath, she knew this wasn’t exactly normal for people on earth.

“I have had boyfriends, and girlfriends, to start with it was all just awkward like broken noses awkward, then there were a few in college but I didn’t get that feeling. I found that I could um well I could keep people happy without letting them touch me, I wanted to only do that if it felt right and it never did not until you. James and Adam were a couple of kisses and that was enough to know it wasn’t right. Lucy and Amy a little more but still nothing the other way. Mon-El well he was the worse he kept pushing and trying to get me to but I didn’t feel it, I didn’t want to give something to him that was being demanded, now it’s here the feeling and now I can’t seem to shut it off”

Lena listened carefully, wanting to make sure she understood. Broken noses? Oh dear. They’d have to talk about the strength thing at some point but now didn’t seem the right time. Kara’s vulnerability in these moments was endearing and Lena almost felt bad about asking in a public place, even if they were alone. Kara was unbreakable yet Lena wanted to hold her in a protective hold as a spark of anger flash over her eyes at the thought of Mon-El having pushed the blonde for more. Lena said and tiptoed to place a soft kiss on her forehead. 

“Oh Kara...,You could never make me uncomfortable with what you’re feeling. Come on. Let’s pay for these and head back to my place. We can take it as slow as you need.”


	22. The unsuccessful rouse

Alex’s apartment (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:15………

Alex had showered and put on makeup, her hair was styled to the side and she had put on some of her more expensive jewelry, she had put on her lingerie, not that she was expecting that she would be seen in it, but there was something about going to this place that made her feel she needed the extra. She was pacing in a robe waiting for Vasquez, there was nothing on the news that suggested the DEO would be needed but she could have got delayed or maybe she was not able to get the dress out. There was a knock on the door and Alex moved to it and opened it up seeing Vasquez on the other side. She reached out and ushered her in taking the dress from her and opening the garment bag.

“Whoo, no hello nothing, Jesus who are you going out with tonight, your wound like a top, and that make up is stunning”

Alex had already thrown the robe to the side and stepped into the dress pulling it up over her as she turned to Vasquez and looked at her, she may have done as asked for the dress without no question, but she wasn't confident that there would be no question about who she was going out with. She wasn't sure how long it would take her to get to the restaurant and she didn't want to be late, not only would that be a negative impression but she wasn't guaranteed that she would get into the restaurant. Alex slipped the dress over her shoulder, and moved closer to Vasquez.

“Hello, thanks for the dress, can you Zip me up please”

Vasquez noted the lack of answer, she couldn't believe it, was Alex really this stupid, she couldnt be going down that road again not with Maggie. She couldn't think of anyone that Alex would be going out with that she would not tell her about, sure they didn't sit around and braid each other's hair, and their bond was forged through battle, and through blood over hugs and fluffy girls nights but that didn't make it any more true. She moved her hands to zip up the dress and waited for Alex to turn. She looked stunning, she really did, she looked into her eyes, for anyone else anyone, she would wish her luck, tell her she looked like a knockout but for Sawyer, she hoped for the opposite. The woman had hurt Alex too much, too many times.

“You look great, but she doesn't deserve it, she has been a raving bitch for two days, she pissed off Lex and now I have to babysit her, It may not be my place Alex, but Maggie was bad news before and she is bad new now, without the DEO there is nothing stopping you turning to alcohol and back to that cycle of angry and aggressive sex, I can see the bruises, she isn't good for you.”

Alex groaned internally, she had forgotten about the bruises from the incident with Maggie, stripping in front of Vasquez common place after their time at the DEO. It was a natural conclusion she supposed, the bruises were from Maggie, but that was the last road she was planning to walk. Running her hand over the back of her neck she smiled. It was only a half smile, but it was something, she caught the dark eyes of Vasquez and nodded, she had heard from Maggie about the change of the protocol and assumed that it was something that she had done, Vasquez just confirmed that. What could Alex say though? She was going to meet Lex Luthor, who she asked out on a date as a distraction but then decided that she wanted it to be one, a woman who until a conversation a few days ago she thought was a monster but now couldn't seem to get off her mind? Could she say it was a business meeting, not dressed like this. She thought about it for a beat longer.

“I am not meeting Maggie, one slip was enough to show me that it is a painful road, I am going to dinner with Lex Luthor. Just because I left the DEO early doesn't mean that I am not still invested in Keeping Kara safe.”

Vasquez was shocked at the revelation but didn't show it, after all she was a trained agent, and well she wasn't going to let something like that show shock. She wondered for a moment, after all she had spent time with Lex, she was striking and intelligent, not at all what she expected. It didn't mean she trusted her, and Alex had a vested interest.

“Oh well why didn't you just say that, I wouldn't have got all up in your business. I have to get off, you need to be dropped off somewhere? Can't imagine that you can ride the beast in that”

Alex had accepted the drop off and arrived at the restaurant at five to seven. She waited outside, not wanting to try her luck at getting in, and smoothed down the black dress and waited.

Lex office DEO (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:30………

Lex had made it to the lab today, although she was being careful not to go directly there she chose a route that would avoid being seen, she didn’t want anyone knowing where she was. After all she still wasn't sure why Alex had been in the Café the morning before. She worked on the properties and potentials of the kryptonite, she had managed to change the color with vibrational variations and elemental shifts creating a wide variety that was now her focus. She had found that the one she was testing increased growth, it made it quicker and easier to grow larger vegetables and could have profound implications.

She had been working through the afternoon and got called to the DEO, sitting down signing things she was handed, she had learned a little from her disregard at Luthor Corp. She still had no interest in what was going on but she wouldn’t blind sign now. She read over the requests and as it approached time for dinner and Lex changed into a red dress, it was a nice sleeveless number with a plunging neckline, the bottom was an A line with a slit up the side, the dress was just above the knee. She checked her makeup, the smoky eye and the red lipstick was perfect as always, her mother's insistence on having make up that was striking but not painted was something that Lex had perfected. She called for the car and exited the DEO, the driver opened the door and complimented her outfit. She nodded politely and smiled before slipping into the town car. 

CharMichaels (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:55………

Pulling up at five to seven she saw Alex. She looked different like this, she was always attractive but she was beautiful in the dress. The black dress was not of any designer that she knew but there was a simplicity to it that was perfect on the frame of the Danvers woman. It showed her soft curves and her long torso, her long legs and the muscled shoulders. She was pleased to see her, she wasn’t sure if she would attend. There was still ambiguity around the purpose of the meeting, but she had taken her up on the return invite maybe that meant that the invitation, not the first but the subsequent one was indeed genuine. She stepped out of the car and moved towards Alex smiling softly.

“Alex, your dress is lovely and appropriate for the restaurant, you look nice, shall we?”

Alex looked at Lex as she exited her breath hitched in her chest and she licked her lips to moisten her drying mouth. The red dress didn't just hug Lex’s curves it seemed to meld to her body like a second skin, exposing her long legs, shapely and beautiful, the neckline gave a glimpse of her ample cleavage and her heart accelerated, she had not really looked at Lex not like this, normally her business suits hid this view and what a view it was, she could hardly believe that this was the same woman.

“That dress is not bad either Lex, red is definitely your color”

Alex opened the door for her, wondering if the returned compliment had been adequate, Lex had been specific with hers, the dress and the appropriateness of it. She didn't think that telling Lex she looked hot was the right response, she did, god did she look hot but that was not something you said to a woman like Lex Luthor, Alex felt out of her depth, if this was a date, she was not going to hold Lex’s interest long, Alex felt her heart squeeze a little why did she want to continue with this?.

Lex took the compliment graciously, she didn’t think much of it after all it was a social convention, when meeting someone for dinner you pay them a compliment they return and things go forward. Although there was some confusion for Lex around why they were having dinner together and Alex and her behavior in general, she was every bit the uncontrollable variable Lex had assessed her as, she didn’t think that the compliment meant any more than a greeting. She walked through ignoring the whispers as she passed. She didn’t pay any mind to the mediocre minds that had the Incapability of understanding what they don’t know, what they don’t know, and that they know nothing of Lex.

“My name is Jamie, I will be your waiter tonight, your table is ready Miss Luthor, would you like to hear the specials? Or start with a drink and then look at the menus?”

The waiter pulled the seat out for Lex and then for Alex as he spoke, placing the napkins over their laps and pouring water into glasses. He handed each a menu, although like everyone else that worked there he knew that there was no need, Miss Luthor did not order off the specials board, she ate here once a week each week had a specific meal and she didn't alter, although the addition of the red head was definitely something new. He made sure not to look up with surprise.

Alex had sat down after her seat was pulled out and she looked at him as she spoke, she was not used to this treatment, this was not the normal restaurant that Alex ate in, she had no idea what would be on offer but the house red was normally a safe bet. She was handed the menu and smiled, the waiter was definitely efficient, giving all the needed information while settling the guest to avoid unnecessary interruption.

“Can I have a house red please”

Lex had not really been paying attention. The people here knew her routine as well as she did, she allowed Alex to make the choice, she didn't need to hear the specials, and she would order the same wine as always. She heard Alex roger a house red and raised her brow.

“The house red is still the 2016 Chateauneuf-du-Pape, is it not?”

The waiter nodded, she couldn’t have that Alex was probably not much of a wine drinker but still that was not a good bottle. She wouldn't normally subvert someone's choice but if Alex was going to have a glass of wine with her dinner it needed to be better than the swill they served as house, no one ordered it, except the people who really didn't have a clue, who were not supposed to be here. However on this occasion Alex was supposed to be and she was wanted, she wouldn't have the staff looking down on her, she payed money for this kind of restaurant because it wasn't filled with general people. There was a level of etiquette and confidentiality that she enjoyed.

“Cancel the house red, please bring a bottle of decanted and rested 2008 chateau Margaux, my normal and have another bottle ready, my guest can share my bottle”

The waiter looked momentarily startled and then composed himself before nodding and leaving them.

“The house red here is not a good vintage and is very overpriced for glorified vinegar, if you do not like the one I have ordered you can feel free to reorder the house wine

Lex looked at the menu it was more for appearance than anything she knew exactly what she would have and so did all the staff but she maintained the pretense. She ran through the rules of social etiquette, there was a need to make a level of small talk when eating out with someone, and she ran through the things that she could ask, why were you watching me yesterday was something on her list but didn't really make small talk criteria. She couldn't ask about work as she had quit her job only three days ago. However she had been talking about a job with Lena. She thought it was a good place to start.

“How was the meeting with Lena? Did she find something for you?”

Fuck, that was not what she was expecting, and how the hell did she over look that, she had originally asked for the date to get out of talking about the meeting with Lena something to buy her time to have a reason behind what was happening. She had wanted to buy time so that she could continue talking to Lex, to continue to get to know her. How in the past three days had she not been able to come up with something to even remember the fact that she was supposed to have a reason. What the hell was she going to say now. She swallowed hard and looked at Lex.

“W-- we have not settled on anything yet, we had a discussion about timing, and organization, we talked about how we could work together without having to be around each other all the time. We haven't settled on a plan yet.”

Something in Alex felt bad for lying, it wasn't a direct lie but it felt less than honest, the interactions with Lex had always had this feeling of honesty in a way she had never had with anyone before like, they could just say the truth without any concern. She had never had someone be open with her, or her be open in return, not even with Kara, after all she lied to her for years about what she did. She wanted to change the subject so that she wouldn't have to talk in any more untrue ways. She felt that Lex deserved that, after all she was it would appear honest to a fault.

“Well the menu is amazing although a small business loan will be needed to pay for a meal here. You seem to know a lot about Wine, I don’t really know much about it, we only drink it at games nights and that, how do you know so much about it?”

Lex noticed the pauses and the stutter in Alex's explanation, she had found her to be quite eloquent although a little crass at times, she was confident with speaking and this told Two things. Firstly Alex wasn’t telling the truth, not the whole truth and there was something going on that Lena wanted kept from her—she didn’t like that idea at all. Secondly the invite to dinner had been as means of deception or subterfuge, a way to distract her—this also bothered her. She thought she had made progress but clearly it was not the case. She looked at the menu that bothered her more than it should have, she thought maybe just maybe Alex had seen her and something else, not just Lex Luthor the monster.

“My father didn't take kindly to me as a child. He wanted a boy, he loved wine so I learned all I could to try and create some kind of equilibrium between us..”

She no longer wanted to share with Alex although she normally found herself saying what was in her mind suddenly she was not feeling as comfortable, friends close enemies closer. Not that she had any friends since Clark and well that didn’t go so well. She would need to expand considerable energy to create a filter to avoid talking too much but she needed to do so.

“You know if Lena hasn’t found anything I could do with a bioengineer, and one with your understanding of certain rocks would be of value, don’t worry there is no chance of your sister coming into contact with them”

Lex chuckled at the irony. She was literally just thinking that she needed to add a filter and her next statement tells the sister of the super she had kryptonite. Also, Alex was concerned about the money, she didn’t have any particular reason to make Alex pay after all she had told her where to be, why did she care? It was too confusing to unpack here.

“Although you just quit the last job where we worked together of a fashion maybe that was a stupefied suggestion, something that even the most mediocre mind would have realized before saying, either way don’t worry about the bill we will write it off as a business meeting”

Alex felt that Lex closed off a little, she didn't know how she could tell she certainly didn't know her well enough for that, but there was more to the story with her father, and then the suggestion about Kryptonite, was she pushing her, she wasn't sure exactly why or what she wanted to achieve. Trying to decipher the information she needed from this and work out a plan, Lex’s plan was beyond her. She wouldn't stand a chance. She would have more luck beating her at a game of chess, and well not even Lena could do that. She didn't like the way she had been untruthful or that it had caused a change in Lex, above all else she didn't want to lose the opportunity to get to know Lex.

“I am not smart enough to do this, to try and work out what you're doing and keep what I am doing from you. I don't want to try, I met with Lena on a project it may or may not result in a job, it is a secret project and I can't tell you what it is, it is nothing connected to you, we are not looking into you, but you need to ask Lena”

Alex couldn't have weaved and dodged all through the dinner and there was no way that she could out think Lex, it could get ugly quick and she didn't want that either. What did she want? She wanted to know Lex, she wanted to be in her company, she wanted to get to know this fascinating woman better, and she could have just blown it. Above all else she wanted to just be in the moment with this woman, in this moment of honesty and share with her.

“I am sorry but it isn't my project, it is Lena’s and I am not sure if I Will be working on it or not yet, at least not in a paid capacity…”

Lex expected a threat, something of a dramatic standoff; she had more or less admitted she had kryptonite to the hot headed Danvers sister, instead she heard her mumble about not being smart. She looked up at her and tilted her head to the side raising her brow. So it was something with Lena but not a job as such and it wasn’t connected with Lex. She was so confused about this turn, ever the undefined variable she had once again surprised her.

“So you and my sister have a plan for something but not to come after me, that means one thing only there is only one person that would have you two on the same side”

“I um, I think it's best you ask Lena, I just don't want that to get in the way……..”

Alex stopped speaking as the waiter arrived and offered her a taste of the wine. She smiled politely and took a sip. She had no idea if it was good or not. She looked at the waiter and smiled.

“I think it's best that you give Miss Luthor the final say.”

Lex looked up as Alex stopped talking as the Waiter was approaching the glass was presented and Alex refused it, she wanted to know what this conversation was getting in the way of, what was it Alex was hoping for from tonight and their dinner. She was as ever lacking in definable information to make a hypothesis not that Alex was ever someone who fit into any equation. Lex took the customary sniff and sip checking as the film coated the glass and nodded two glasses poured and the waiter asked for her order.

“I will have the rib eye rare with Hassel back potatoes and peas, no mushrooms or onion rings, thank you”

She looked to Alex to order, she showed no sign that she was planning to leave at this point but she didn’t know why.

“Can I get the steak in peppercorn sauce, with the fries, garlic mushrooms and grilled tomatoes please”

Alex waited for the waiter to leave she wanted to talk to Lex, to reassure her she knew that she didn't like change and this was a big thing inviting her to join her, there was a likelihood that if she messed this up she wouldn't get another opportunity and she didn't want to waste this chance. Lex was interesting and above all that she felt comfortable in a strange way, she was sure it was some residual effect of the shift in the dimensions that meeting Lex resolved but still. Alex wasn't ready to say goodbye to that yet. She wouldn't acknowledge Lex’s correct assumption of the unifying force but she did want to reassure the brunette. She also needed to find out if Lex had Kryptonite, it was wrapped up in a job offer, she wasn't sure what was going on there.

“It's a project not connected to you or harming you in any way. As for Kryptonite, do you actually have it or was that some kind of test? Were you trying to provoke me because I can tell you now Lex anyone having that is a problem for me. It is nothing to do with who you are but more what it can do.”

Lex watched her order and waited for the server to leave, Lex had also been waiting but Alex jumped in first, Lex applied the rule of turn taking the conversational convention and closed her mouth letting Alex speak. When she was finished Lex raised her brow.

“As you said Alex although I am not sure why you felt the need to reassure me again. My sister wouldn’t come after me. We are much like you and Kara we protect each other”

She sat back and watched as Alex continued talking about the job offer, it was stupid of Lex to mention it and when she heard Alex order she thought that her admission had been unnoticed it appears not. Alex was still not angry or threatening and although she was clearly not happy at the thought and said as much she was still being civil. She had stayed and ordered, there was nothing that suggested the comment on Kryptonite was any kind of threat but then there was clearly a part of Alex second guessing the reason it was mentioned.

“You are aware I am the world leading expert on that particular rock, my research is not connected to the DEO or 7734, it is a completely sealed, protected and secret lab.”

She sighed she had hoped that this would be a longer standing option, talking with Alex but this would be the nail in the coffin she was sure, she would say what she needed to and if Alex left and came after her she would take precautions. After all there was no way to know exactly what the woman would do with this information after all it was technically a direct threat to her sister not that Lex was using it that way. Lex held up her hand and took a sip of wine.

“My work is very important to me, not only is it possible to synthesize the mineral but I have been able to change the vibrational frequencies and the visual spectrum to create a number of different colors and variations. So far I can create a power supply as strong as a nuclear reactor without the harm, I can increase the growth rate and size of plant life, and I have been able to designate plant life, none of the kinds that have properties that affect plant life or humans affected the kryptonian samples, all the ones that did are stored securely, as I said I protect my sister, and hurting Kara would hurt Lena I can assure you that is not on my list of curiosities.”

Lex sat back and waited now for handcuffs? A gun in her face? Screaming? It was anyone’s guess, this would be valuable information in understanding Alex which she really did want to do. She was sure that the world that was created by the other Lex would have safeguards, her position was not selected for nothing although it could cause problems it wouldn't be a long standing issue.

“So yes I was serious about having it and yes I was serious about you working with me”


	23. Accidentally employed

Angelique's Boutiques (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:55………

Kara smiled at her and placed her hand on the woman’s face as she leaned in to kiss her softly , she tilted her head and she moved in showing Lena how soft she could be. She saw the anger on Lena’s face for a moment and smiled before pulling her in for a hug. She chuckled and picked up the items putting her arm around lena.

“Don’t worry he regretted it. I think we are better off in private, for many reasons. But um maybe we can talk some more?”

Kara knew this was not the easiest thing in the world for her and she had a feeling it wasn’t Lena’s favored topic, as flirty as she was and how easy she made sexual undertones to embarrass her, she felt that Lena didn’t talk about this much. She put the items on the counter and put her card down smiling at Lena.

“We can pick up some food?”

“Yes, of course we can talk some more. Let’s go.”

Knowing Kara had made Mon-El pay for his unwanted advances did bring a smile to Lena’s face. She followed her girlfriend out to the front of the store, setting her own outfits down to check out next. A little part of Lena was dying on the inside. She wanted to be able to shower her girlfriend with gifts and not being able to buy these things for her made her just the tiniest bit of anxiety. But on the same hand, she respected Kara’s decision. She would always respect her decisions. The issue is more Lena’s anyway. It’s easy to show ‘love’ by buying things for another person. And this was her way of showing she cared. She’d have to work on how she showed affection and true love and learn to break down her walls one by one.

“Yes, that’s perfect. I had an early lunch so I’m on the verge of starving,” she said playfully.

Lena paid next and ten minutes later, her driver was ushering them into the car. She was holding Kara’s hand as they rode together, bringing it up to her mouth to place a soft kiss on her knuckles. 

“Did you have a little fun at least?” She asked with a grin that bordered on playfully wicked.

Kara was happy that Lena was willing to talk. She was sure that they could talk about anything but Lena was always a little reserved when it came to emotions, always frightened she was on the brink of losing her control. She smiled and waited until they were in the car, Lena's hand in hers, she stroked over her knuckles and enjoyed the way Lena's hand warmed her even though she was already hotter than a human, any touch from Lena warmed her still.

“Well we can't let you starve Lena you're going to change the world, you can’t do that on an empty stomach. Oh yes I had fun Lena, more than a little, possibly too much”

She grinned back, mirroring Lena's playful glint. It wasn’t long before they had food and were at Lena's penthouse, alone in a private place Kara’s heart picked up, she needed to control her desire.

“So food then talking? I mean we really do need to you know do the talk, about us..I have much better control now than I did but I would never want to hurt you”

They rode in the car back to Lena’s in comfortable silence, entwined hands and occasional kisses, picking up the food on the way so they wouldn't have to go out once they had arrived, and hopefully there would be no interruptions, super or otherwise.

CharMichaels (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 19:20………

There was fear, confusion, anger and a whole assault on Alex’s emotional and nervous systems, she couldn't understand why Lex would tell her this or offer her a job, she was confused by what was happening. Fearful of how this could go, Lex had not actively attacked Kara, had not used Kryptonite on her but she had previously on Clark. If Lex had it there was a chance that Lena would have access, something that she had not disclosed. Lena had used Kryptonite, more than once, Lex wouldn't hurt Kara because it would hurt Lena, but what happened if they were not together? If there was a lovers spat? If they broke up? Would Kara be fair game then. Then there was the information from Lex about what it could do, was she really looking into it to help humanity? But how could she be sure of any of it? Lex had done nothing deceptive, she had been honest even when it would be detrimental to her. What Lex said about emotional responses, she needed to calm, she couldn't think clearly.

“I'm going to need a moment”

Lex had laid out bread crumbs, led Alex to a delicious bit of information, every bit as delicious as the meal that would soon been placed in front of her. She needed to calm to get her mind focused, she couldn't take on Lex Luthor not like this not now. She needed evidence but Lex was offering it, she would let her go to her lab. She was offering her the opportunity to work with her, she opened the door to this, why? What was the end game? She took a drink of the wine and cooled her temper. Was she testing her somehow trying to see what Alex would do if she would lie and come after her? Then a recognition she had lied to Lex was this a chance to rectify it and get back on an even footing. An offer or trust from Lex Luthor?

“You knew that I was lying when I said I wanted Lena to give me a job didn't you?”

It hadn’t taken long for Lex’s words to land with the former agent, she watched the micro gestures in her face with care, she found that the science behind them was a better gage than her when it came to emotions. She saw the fear register with Alex and sighed softly, Alex was afraid of her and what she would do, then there was anger, Alex was hot headed and Lex was not convinced the public setting would deter from that. The likelihood was that dinner was going to be over, Lex just hoped that it wouldn’t result in a big show that would probably result in a meeting with her mother. Why was she being honest with this woman, it was not in her best interest, why was she meeting with her? Why had she offered her a job?

Lex sat in silence as Alex asked for a moment and watched her down the wine, there was clearly a lot going on within Alex , she was thinking not reacting, the emotion was there but she didn't want to allow it to rule her. Mental calculations and processes of elimination had not concluded that this would be the result of this particular conversation. Once again Alex was surprising her, and once again it was not causing her to become unstable.

“Even with you as a variable that seemed like a unlikely reason to be meeting her, after all you had clearly displayed a level of disdain for her that wouldn’t create a easy working relationship, your over qualified as a lab tech, and Lena wouldn’t trust you with security”

Lex wasn’t sure why this was the question that Alex had chosen to ask, or why she wasn’t currently staring down the barrel of a 22. Lex was fairly sure Alex would have one with her. It seemed like the connections in Alex’s brain worked differently, she couldn't understand them at all, and for someone with a 12level intellect and a non neurotypical brain this was quite unexpected and somewhat fascinating.

“I understand that as her sister you want to protect her and ensure she comes to know harm, but as a scientist are you not curious about the possibilities and advancements that could be made if these crystals are analyzed?”

Lex spotted the waiter heading towards them. She didn't need anyone over hearing anything that could cause issues and she didn't need Alex causing a scene where she raised her brow and lowered her voice.

“Our orders are coming, we need to change the subject, I am sure that you don’t want anyone hearing this, any more than I want a scene”

Alex observed her, trying to capture any relevant information from her. She realized that although she didn't answer the question as literally as she expected, which meant that Lex was modifying her answers or maybe she wasn't maybe the deduction was the literal answer, but the lack of distinction said that Lex had known Alex was lying, that the dinner offer had been disingenuous to start, yet she invited her to dinner anyway. Not only that, she'd laid Kryptonite on the table and possible scientific exploration just as enticing as the food. Alex knew a little about Lex and her honesty and could only assume that she was genuine when she spoke about the Kryptonite. She had thought that the information was intriguing, and the possibilities endless, Alex would have been lying to herself if she didn't admit that she was intrigued. However Alex couldn't look the possible threat to her sister, Kryptonite in any form was something that caused issues for Kara as she knew her, her very existence. Once the waiter had vacated the area Alex had calmed enough to speak.

“My sister would not be happy knowing about this neither would superman, she would probably kill me for even contemplating working with you, it would be a betrayal to do so and not tell her though, I would have to talk to her. What I don't understand is why in the hell would you talk to me about this Lex, you know my connection with Kara and you know that I would want to protect her. Are you trying to spark my scientific interest? Do you really want me watching your every move? You know how protective I am"

Alex focused on the meal for a moment, she needed more time, she was calmer but not quite there yet. The food was exquisite, the streak was tender and perfectly cooked, the peppercorn sauce was creamy and fiery, it was heavenly. She let out a moan softly in satisfaction as she closed her eyes. Eating at least wouldn’t result in death threats or catastrophe, and at the prices here she was going to enjoy it.

Lex found Alex fascinating; she couldn’t remember a time where a person held this much interest; normally the mundane existence of humans held little interest, the confusion they presented far outweighed their interest. She had been fascinated by superman, but in a negative way, his presence and lack of consistency coupled with his strange fixation on her and her survival, it caused such a catastrophic event in her mind he was dangerous for her. Alex however interested her, fascinated her, made her anxious and confused but she could manage the impact and she somehow made her better. Maybe that’s why she was being honest; and Alex’s response to her was no less fascinating.

“Then tell her” Lex state’s flatly.

“I am not doing anything evil or devious. The only thing that I am doing is keeping it from the government, I will have no more of my projects twisted, I want to see what they can do, if you want to come and inspect you can. Maybe Lex Luthor has nothing to hide Alex. As I have told you before I am not a monster, I am not him, I am just me, curious”

Lex wondered what it would be like to be the main focus of Alex Danvers. What would that look like? the simple fact is that as much as Lex is fascinated by her she wouldn’t try to get closer to her, people had no interest in Lex and Alex would be less likely to have any positive interest than most. Lex assumed after this meal that Alex appears to be staying for other than an observation operation so she wouldn’t see her again.

“It is safe it is not possible to take it from my lab, and the possibilities are endless, just because there is danger doesn’t mean the potential should be neglected, Marie curie died to create something that saved millions”

Tell her! Did Lex just suggest that? Was she so sure that what she was doing was going to be of no consequence to Kara that she didn't care if she knew? Or was she just so sure that no one could stop her. Did she really think of herself a curie? Someone who was benevolently working towards the betterment of mankind? Lex was shown to have the passion of someone like Curie but that was a double edged sword, Curie had killed herself in her explorations. She would have to tell Kara she could imagine the look on her face, the hurt if she found out after she was working on it. Lex had told her to do so, she didn't even have to hide it. If this was some crazy manipulation Alex couldn't see the endgame, then she wouldn't be able to, not with Lex, she would always be thinking so many steps in front. She was invited into the hub of Lex’s creations, the center of her world. She couldn't believe that she was doing this, she needed to tell Kara but she was agreeing, if nothing else she could make sure it was safe, she would have paid for this information a week ago a reason to go after Lex but here she is finding that she is fighting with herself, because she believed Lex and wanted to work with her, to get to know her, she believed her.

“I don't think you're a monster, and I think that we need to make sure that we are more careful than curie, when would I start because I want to talk to Kara.”

Lex put a fork full of food into her mouth as she contemplated Alex. Once again she was not reacting in any way that she would have predicted, the woman really was like an amorphous individual, in personality and behavior. There was no rhyme or reason that could explain her. She currently sat opposite the Luthor looking at her as though she was looking into her, trying to see her inner workings, like her eyes could perform the function of tools on a mechanism, dismantling it to look at what makes it work. She was analyzing her but with a softness Lex has never seen before. It was like she was seeing something other than a Luthor; something other than the monster she had been carved into. Lex wondered if it was possible that Alex would check and leave her alone after that, she wasn’t hiding what she was doing just where, she didn’t want the government involved. Lex tilted her head and looked at her, she accepted the job? That again was an unexpected turn.

“Well once I have had breakfast Monday I will be returning to the lab, as I do daily, now I hope you don’t mind but as I want some privacy to work I would prefer to take you there, not give you the address, any trackers would be disabled on entrance”

Lex wanted her to know if it was some ploy she was ready for it but at the same time there was a hopefulness in her, she had been taught this from Lena, the stimulation her body was feeling and a positive slant in her thinking, hope that’s what Lena called it she hoped Alex was truly open minded. She slid across a card with her personal number on.

“So you can start Monday, if you wish to wait until you have spoken to Kara then you can call me”

Alex’s mind spun in a million different directions at once, her body reacted to the potential threat that she was under. Being taken to a place that she didn't know with no way of communicating with anyone no way of being tracked, wondering if this was the end game that she had been trying to work out, having Alex would give her power over Kara but at the same time, Lex had been honest and suggested that there was no intent. Not to mention her predilection to protect Lena. Kara and Lena had a relationship full of pain and hurt because of a secret not unlike her and Maggie, there always being ways to twist things to change things, all lies and omission Maggie said were to help Alex but that never seemed to work out. Much like the secrets between Kara and Lena seemed to cause more damage than good. She wondered if the barrier had been removed would there have been such hurt? Lex had been nothing but honest so far, she couldn't help but wonder if this was as transparent as it seems? She took the card offered and placed it into her clutch, she would need to be transparent with Kara, and tell her what she was doing with Lex. She owed her sister that even if it would be something that would cause a disagreement. She knew in her heart as much as the thought would scare Kara there wasn’t a person in the world that she would trust with this more than Alex, and she could ensure there was no danger, even if that was all she managed to do it would be worth taking any risk that this situation presented. She would meet with her before monday. Yes she was doing this she was going to work with Lex, with kryptonite, but she was not yet in a position that she felt entirely comfortable.

“I will be transparent with Kara, but the decision is mine to make. I want you to know that I don't like anyone having Kryptonite, or a multiple variety of them, but I see that you have been honest and I will be as frank with you. I do not believe you to be a monster and I believe that you have no intent to hurt Kara. I am trusting you, I am choosing to trust you and I will be ready for Monday but I will not allow any harm to befall my sister. Hours of work can not be regular office hours. I have super friends duties to attend to.”

Lex listened watching, the emotions flashed over her face too quickly for Her to even manage to start to work them out, she would need to rely on micro gestures when she spoke. She sat with an uncomfortable feeling as she waited, she didn’t know why she cared so much what Alex thought or did, but she did, that in itself was uncomfortable and waiting for a response; one that could literally be plucked from the stratosphere was excruciating. She talked about transparency with Kara, Lex had expected that, then her caramel eyes fixed on Lex’s, she was a little shocked and her breath caught. She wasn’t comfortable with eye contact but she couldn’t not look at Alex.

“I hope you can understand this Alex, as much as I hope that you really do see me as something other than a monster, the result of me blindly trusting you will cost much more than just my lab and research, it would mean my freedom, my mind and possibly more of my inventions falling into the wrong hands”

She took a breath and smiled as she took the card and said about her other activities. Lex had a feeling that she was more than support of the sidelines but didn’t say anything. She was taking a risk with Alex and she knew it, it wasn’t even calculated as Alex was such an anomaly. She could end up In Treatment or taken back to 7734 now she was functioning and they would want her back. She was only free as long as she could keep a level of anonymity, she hoped this strange fascination and ease with Alex wasn’t misplaced. The feeling of connection to Alex, an understanding and a reverence for the red head was not something that she was accustomed to, but then whenever Alex was in proximity she appeared to have a number of things that were different but not necessarily unpleasant. The level of trust she was affording Alex, and Alex was affording her in exchange was unprecedented.

“There Will be no blindfolds or anything I am not asking for that, just that the address is held back for now, trust my dear Alex goes both ways and I have chosen, as you put it to trust you with a lot of truth, and you are trusting me to take you to the lab, which I trust you will be able to keep discrete about”

Once again there was a lot of information to take in, it would appear that whenever Lex chose to share it was like a data download, not only that but her body had reacted to the way the words “My Dear” from Lex’s lips. Her heart rate increased and her skin seemed to radiate a small current that warmed and tingled, it suddenly felt more alive than ever before. This was something that took her by surprise and that reaction was something that Alex needed to examine but not now. There was so much to unpack and look at from this and every interaction with Lex, she wondered if she would ever find the time to truly understand her. She had not even factored in Lex in the thoughts prior to her most recent words, she had thought about her own vulnerability, Kara’s the possible demise, outcome and pain that this course of action could have. What she didn't think of was the vulnerability that Lex was feeling, what damage that this course of action could do to her, how she was putting her faith in Alex and letting her into the very thing that could have her back, held against her will. She was opening it all up for Alex and trusting her.

“You have my word that you will have complete discretion, and I will not try and find out where we are working until you feel safe to tell me.”

There was a lot going on but not what the original purpose of the meal was, there was a reason that she asked Lex out, yes initially a distraction but then after that it was to get to know her, to get to know Lex and understand her. As much as Lex has turned the invite on its head and given Alex the alternate invitation taking control, which Alex could see what important to her, the reason for her attendance still remained and she wanted to know her. In an effort to change the conversation to change the meaning behind the meal back to the original function she looked at Lex. Her face held a small smile, her lips pulled to one side slightly as she gazed at the woman.

“Tell me something about you that isn’t in one of the many files I have read about you from the DEO?”

When Alex so quickly responded to her hope that Alex could be discreet she tilted her head and furrowed her brow the micro gestures and postural relax told her that Alex was being completely honest with her. She continued to eat, not enjoying her food cold, she wanted to finish. As Alex spoke again she glanced up, Alex’s had a sort of smile not quite but close like a smirk but not malicious. It was playful and changed the often harsh edge to Alex’s face. She was struck by the fact that when not being forceful and attempting to intimidate her; Alex looked younger, softer and beautiful. It caught Lex off guard almost enough for her to miss the question. She swallows and takes a sip of wine, contemplating the purpose of the question, what would Alex want to know and why? Everyone already knew everything they needed to know about her, criminal dossiers, tabloids, even gossip rags.

“Well that’s a very open question, there is a lot of information about me, not all accurate or factual, and as other than my breakfast and dinner I am normally in my lab; few people have the opportunity to ask, those who do are not interested in a reply”

She was thrown off and anxious about answering, her thoughts and body reacting to a possible danger. She thought for a moment and looked at Alex wondering what to tell her? After all she really didn’t have much use for small talk and everything about her was to be hidden according to her mother, she looked down at her hands and tapped out prime numbers.

“My favorite opus is Jupiter, I don’t care for chocolate flavored things. I prefer the real deal, and I like to walk in the rain. How about you Miss Danvers what wasn’t in your file”

Alex was struck by three things all at once. First she didn't have a clue what the opus Jupiter was and it seemed a little strange that someone like Lex who didn't seem interested in most forms of recreation liked music and it would appear classical, she wondered if it was the composition, something in the pattern of the music, she would have to listen to it, but this was very interesting to her. Especially with the second thing that she noted, the tapping of Lex’s fingers, was she tapping out the Opus? She also noticed that there were two things that they had in common, Alex loved walking in the rain especially on warm days, with someone she loved, someone that she could kiss in the warmth being bathed in the soft rain, and she loved real chocolate. She wondered how many other things that she could have in common with Lex. she looked again at the fingers tapping away, she wondered what was going on inside of Lex that was causing this behavior. She wondered if this was anxiety although the thought was odd after a conversation with such intensity moments ago but a few answers about her inner world. She had seen Lex react to things with mumbles and finger movements previously it was something that she wanted to ask about.

“I enjoy music, Hallelujah is my favorite but not the more upbeat pop version the more intense version by Jeff Buckley, I also love chocolate and anything sweet, dessert is my favorite part of the meal, I think it comes from having Kara as a sister the higher the calorie content the sweeter the treat the more she can eat, although she doesn't have to hit the gym after. Her metabolism is the thing I am most jealous of. I often walk in the rain when sad, the water washing away the feeling, the rain offers quite the romantic setting, kissing in the rain at sunset on a warm summer day is something that I enjoy greatly.”

Lex listened to Alex’s replies and thought about the song. She knew it, Lena liked to play the same song by different artists so that Lex could understand the difference in the song, how the same patterns could produce such different results, she often thought that this was some attempt to help her understand that just because there is a pattern doesn't mean the outcomes are the same.

“The guitar at the beginning is haunting, the way it starts like it’s almost of key and then harmonizes is brilliant, his voice has a rasp like he is reliving something traumatic and is on the verge of breaking one moment and soft and sorrowful the next. The lack of accompanying instruments makes it simple and elegant all at once”

Emotions may have no meaning to Lex but music had cadences that she understood patterns and rhythms that once you understood the reason behind you knew what it was trying to convey, Lena had used this when she was young to try and explain human emotion to her. She smiled at Alex talking about deserts and Lena had similar things.

“Lena and I share a secret love of pancakes she would make them for me for breakfast and flip them, I would calculate her success depending on the trajectory and angles depending on Bali it’s of the pancake and the velocity of her spinning, mother didn’t like it”

She wasn’t sure why she shared such a personal memory with Alex but the memory of Lena itself was comforting. 

Alex took a sip of her wine and looked at Lex the tapping continued and she wondered if Lex plays the piano, if it was this that she was recreating with the hand movements. She was amazed at the way she spoke about music, the speech she gave was almost like passion, the deep understanding of the emotional connection music has, but Lex says she feels little emotion. She spoke both matters of factly and honestly in most occasions, although managed to provoke emotion in Alex she showed little herself. The only time that she had really seen any displays was when talking about Lena. She liked the way that when Lex spoke about Lena the information had a softer tone and her face took on more appreciation, reverence and love. She reached out her hand tentatively and stroked over Lex’s hand.

“Will you tell me about this? Are you tapping out a piece of music?”

She noticed Alex move her hand and touch her, touch was not something Lex liked unless it was anonymous activities or Lena, although she didn’t retreat, it was soft and a little painful, firm touch was better. She registered the uncomfortable feeling and the slight pain although tried not to show it on her face.

“Alex if you are going to touch me you need to use more pressure, not that I am expecting you to be wanting to touch me but when we work together if you should please don’t brush lightly”

Although a harder touch would have shocked it wouldn’t have hurt Lex’s skin, always a little over sensitive. She knew that there was no way that Alex would have known this, that she wouldn't have that information unless she was closer to Clark than Lex knew and he had shared her information about Lex’s weaknesses, however Alex seemed shocked that she had hurt her. A small comfort, there was no intent behind her actions to harm, which suggested what exactly? Was she trying to comfort? Calm. She didn't know at the moment not enough data, and a way to inconsistent variable predict.


	24. Things are hotting up

Lena’s Penthouse (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:00………

After a quick change into more comfortable clothes, Lena sat with Kara at the large island in her kitchen. She wasn’t sure exactly what they should talk about, other than the obvious regarding the blonde’s strength, but she was open to anything. She owed it to them both to learn to talk about feelings and emotions in a much healthier way. She had not been in many relationships and there were fewer still that were good or healthy, she wanted things to be different with Kara, now that they had this chance, now that they had been brought together. They had already made so many mistakes she just wanted to have the rest of their time be good.

“We can talk while we eat if you’d like. I don’t have anywhere else to be. My time is entirely yours, sweetheart.”

Lena served herself a plate with a little bit of everything they’d picked up on the way. She only briefly got up to get them each a bottle of water, moving back to the seat next to Kara with a wide smile on her face.

Kara waited while Lena changed she loved it when the young CEO got comfortable and let her guard down every time it made Kara love her a little more, and now with the conversation they were going to have she was happy she was comfortable at least in one way.

“Well eating and talking that I can do well”

She laughed lightly and she filled her plate, she wasn’t sure what to start with. She knew that Lena and her had never talked about relationship stuff particularly but that didn't mean that they couldn't, she knew that Lena would find it just as hard as her so she hoped the little joke eased the tension.

“Well I have not really been in a relationship like this, and I am finding that I want more, I love the cuddles and kisses but I just find that I am often thinking about touching you”

She swallowed and took a mouthful of food and chewed, breaking up her talking she could already feel heat in her cheeks. Her heart was racing and she knew that it was going to be harder because the more she admitted her desires the more that she could feel it.

“But I want to let you touch me too, I know I am stronger. If I am better at controlling it, I am sure that your worried about it”

Lena listened carefully as she ate a couple of bites of her food, studying her girlfriend as she did. When she had finished talking Lena smiled a little and started to talk, she was gesticulating and her hands normally she often did this, it stopped her fidgeting and emphasized her points.

“Since earlier this week, I’ve wanted more than the kissing and cuddling too, though...not that I’m not happy just to do those things with you. You truly make me feel special.”

Her hand was back in her lap and she looked away for a moment, trying to align her words with her emotions... which was usually difficult. She was already picking at her cuticles, she just wanted to be better at this, to be better for Kara. she spoke softly when she said the next, almost afraid to hear her own voice.

“I do want to share myself with you in that way. To express through touch what I feel in my heart. To make you feel good, I trust you, completely. And if it ever gets to be more than you can control, we’ll find a way. Together.”

Kara looked up at Lena. She was very measured in her speech; she wished that she could be more clear and well spoken. Her heart jumped a little when Lena said she had wanted to do more too. Kara had never been the focus of any sexual endeavor before hearing that Lena wanted to pleasure her almost made her whimper. Kara smiled brightly at her, she was looking nervous and she didn’t want her to be.

“Lena it’s okay you don’t have to worry about what you're saying I can hear you thinking you know….. Um well I guess that is a new hurdle I have never experienced that kind of thing so I may take a moment to adjust. But I trust you Lena with my heart and my life. We could make my powers less to start if it would make you feel safe”

“Hear me thinking?” 

The CEO asked with a smile before taking another bite. A somewhat cheeky smile on her face and a sparkle in her eyes, she knew that she couldn't actually hear just that there was a look Lena got when she was, Kara was skilled at reading her. Then, Lena put her fork down and swallowed, sitting up straighter. The topic Kara just broached gave her more nerves than the sex talk. Kryptonite had always been a dividing wedge between them, for reasons that made perfect sense 𝒏𝒐𝒘. The constant battle had not made so much sense then. 

“Just to make sure I understand, you mean through the use of kryptonite? To dampen your powers the way you used to train with Alex?”

Kara watched her stiffen and bit her lip, Lena had not liked the thought of using kryptonite, since she first made it and she and Kara fought. She knew that Lena didn't want to make or use Kryptonite for their experiments; she probably wouldn't want to use it in the bedroom, and that wasn't a nice thought or something that Kara really thought would make their romantic endeavors easy.

“Well lena your brilliant, and so creative, we already know that green kryptonite weakens me enough for Alex to kick my ass, but it’s not the nicest feeling and I would prefer to feel you. Then there is the red sun technology, that Lex created which makes me human if I am exposed long enough, but it does dampen me without pain”

She moved closer and placed her hand on Lena’s face looking into her eyes. She wanted Lena to know that she would do whatever she could to ensure that she was going to be safe, knowing that Lena would be safe.

“The two are different radiation frequencies maybe you can come up with a third option something temporary effective and non painful”

Lena stepped into her girlfriend’s space and kissed the tip of her nose sweetly. Her features softened and her heart rate hopefully back to a normal range, she kissed Kara’s lips gently.

“What I’m trying to say is... finding a solution to not using kryptonite or red sun radiation, as you just said. I think I have just the thing in mind that could work. Without ever hurting you. It may take a while to get it ready but until then we can try to get you used to some touch”

Kara watched as Lena moved closer to her and smiled as she kissed her nose. She listened to the explanation that she had and her head tilted slightly. As she kissed her lips, Kara melted into the touch, she loved the way Lena thought she was brilliant truly. She kissed her back and thread her arms around her waist. She moved closer and smiled as she pushed her hair out of her face and looked into those emerald eyes.

“You really are amazing Lena, you always find a different solution”

She dipped her head and kissed her, slipping her tongue past her lips and stroking Lena’s. Food and their work forgotten, the brunette’s hands came up to cup Kara’s face. When their tongues met, Lena’s breathing hitched and her arms snaked around Kara’s neck, pulling her closer. Their lips and tongues moved in sync against each other’s. Barely audible moans crept from Lena’s throat, though she was sure Kara could hear them. Fingers from one hand threaded through silky smooth blonde hair. There was no space between their bodies yet Lena wanted her closer still.

Kara enjoyed the kiss as it progressed. She pulled Lena closer; she just couldn’t get her close enough. Her hands moved around her waist and slipped then under the shirt, stroking her thumbs against her abdomen as her fingers circled her hips. She could hear the moans from Lena and loved the sound of them. Her right hand slipped around her back and moved up through her back. Softly stroking her soft skin. The tips of her fingers grazing over the skin. She moved her head back and started to kiss along her jaw, along to her ear. Her desire was burning within her within moments of them starting to touch, the shopping trip all the exposed skin, and the kisses had primed her it seemed, the build up had been slow but it had not dampened at all it was now burning hotter in her.

“Your so beautiful Lena”

She nipped at the lobe and softly sucked on her pulse point as she pulled closer wanting to be closer. Her lips moving to the nape of Lena’s neck

Lena turned her head, hoping to give better access to her neck for Kara’s soft wandering lips. She’d hoped she might be able to steady her breathing this way, but with kissing and nipping at her now flushed skin, and warm hands on her body, it only made it that much harder.

“You are more captivating...”

Lena could barely get her words out as her hands pulled at Kara’s shirt, intending to free it from its confines of her waistband. Finally, when she did, deft fingers began to undo its buttons. 

“...than...”

Gods, she needed to feel Kara’s body with her own hands. To dig her fingertips into the warm skin at the curve of her hips.

“...the first stunning sunrise of a spring morning.”

Poetry obviously wasn’t Lena’s strong suit at the moment but hopefully her girlfriend understood.

Kara continued her soft exploration of Lena’s body allowing her hands to trail over her stomach and back.

As Lena started to kiss and pull at her shirt she moaned out a little, she wanted nothing more than to feel Lena against her.

“Mmmm lena you make me feel like something so delicate and beautiful, and all the while I thought I was the writer”

Her hand moved her hand over to her abdomen sliding them flagrantly towards Lena's bountiful breasts, she didn’t want to go too far so she stopped in her rib cage and stroked the underside, the swell of her delicate breasts with her thumbs. She pulled back catching her eyes and waiting for a sign it was ok to continue

When Lena’s hands finally roam against the blonde’s abs, it’s her turn to place open mouth kisses along Kara’s neck. Her girlfriend’s words only add fuel to the small fire inside of her. Lena almost whined when Kara pulled them apart, wondering why her hands had stopped at all. When she looks into deep blue eyes, she finds the answer. Oh, Kara. Her sweet, lovely Kara. She was asking for permission for something that was already hers to take. Still, the brunette appreciated the gesture and loves her all the more for it. In answer to the unasked question, Lena steps back slightly, despite her body’s immediate protest. She gently reaches for Kara’s glasses and removes them, setting them on the counter. Then, with a heated gaze, Lena removes her own shirt and bra, letting them fall where they may.

As Lena distanced herself further Kara wondered if she had gone too far, Lena eyes looking at her so intently silenced the concerns in her mind, she swallowed hard as her hands removed her glasses. She smiled as they were set aside and Lena removed her shirt and bra. Kara couldn’t help but allow her eyes drift to the creamy alabaster skin, the soft swell of her breasts and the beautiful rose coloured nipples. She licked her lips as she contemplated them, her desire to hold and kiss them. Her hand reached out her fingers tracing over her abdomen and up to the valley between her perfect breasts.

“Perfection”

She whispered out as she cupped her breast and moved closer, adding her other hand to the bare breast, her hands softly squeezing them. Running her thumb over the nipples lightly. She joined their lips again as she continued to softly stroke and rub over her breasts, trailing kisses down her neck, she wanted to kiss the beautiful bounty before her.

Lena bit her bottom lip to try to stifle the gasp that left when Kara touched her again. Thankfully, she pulled into another searing kiss and desire was muffled into the blonde’s mouth. This wasn’t enough for Lena. She wanted to touch more of her girlfriend too. To trail a warm path along every inch of skin as she discovered it. The brunette reaches between Kara’s body and the material of her shirt, working to unfasten the blonde’s bra. The CEO was out of practice, she hadn’t done this with a woman since college. But after another second she succeeds.

“I want to touch you too,” 

She whispers between heavy breaths, waiting for permission just as Kara had done. When granted, she separates their bodies just long to slide Kara’s shirt over strong shoulders and arms then doing the same with her bra.

Lena’s soft lips trailing over her skin had Kara feeling like she was on fire, the soft brushes of her delectable lips touching her in places that had never been touched. She could feel lenas hands on her shirt and her heart responded in nervous and excited flutters. A soft groan exited her mouth as Lena pulled back but was replaced by a nod and a whimper moments later when Lena was making her way with her shirt, she helped her remove both. Lena’s hands brushing against her skin which suddenly felt soft and mailable under her touch. She moved in once more hands trailing from her cheeks down her perfect neck to her breasts. She tenderly cupped then and toyed with the now hardened nipples leaving space for Lena to explore as she started a searing kiss to those sinfully delicious lips.

Lena let herself be swept into the passionate kiss, telling Kara everything she felt without any words. The brunette turned them so Kara’s backside was against the edge of her kitchen island countertop. Lena let her hands roam her girlfriend’s body smoothly until she reached her breasts. This time it was Lena’s turn to whimper into the kiss. Kara’s nipples were already hardened. The pads of the thumb move over them and she can’t wait any longer. Lena breaks the kiss and nips at Kara’s bottom lip, tugging it between her teeth before releasing it. She left a slow trail of wet kisses down her chin and neck until she reached the center where her collarbones met. She dipped her tongue into the small hollow and licked upward while she pinched Kara’s nipples with light pressure. She urged the blonde to lean back slightly. Then the CEO continued her kisses until she reached the breast currently in her left hand. While looking up to meet her girlfriend’s gaze, a soft tongue licked at the tip

Kara’s phone went off. It was Alex’s ring tone she ignored it, too wrapped up in Lena, she looked at her as she raised her brow, she was about to say something about it not being important when it rang off, Lena’s phone then kicking in. It was Lexi, Kara’s phone started again and they stopped looking at each other, both reaching for their phones, Lexi and Alex were both together this must be serious. Lena answered there was no noise on the other side, Kara answered to a frantic Alex. Her eyes widened and she told her she would be right there.

“Something is up, Lex isn't ok, you need to find her, and I need to find Alex.”

Kara kissed her briefly hating to leave her especially now, but this was clearly something big, she sped into her clothes and looked longingly at Lena. Lena nodded to her and smiled; she knew that she had to go.

CharMichaels (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:00………

Alex moved her hand back immediately; she had not wanted to hurt Lex at all, it was to draw attention to the action she was trying to discuss. The comment on the tough had two effects, one the need to pull away to avoid further hurt and two for Alex to linger on the thought that she could touch Lex again. Not only that she could but that Lex wouldn't be opposed as long as it was firm, that made her wonder about how firm that the touch needed to be, and if that translated into the bedroom. Her mind has spiraled down this path, quickly descending to thoughts of what Lex would be like in that situation once again, this was not the first time, but now she was wondering if Lex was another woman Like Maggie, although she wanted the harder touch for herself. She needed to shake it off and move along.

“I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt you, I will try to be more firm in the future when I touch you, I mean in the lab or whatever, um, tell me how is walking in the rain nice if soft touch hurts?”

She swallowed she needed something else, her statements were a ramble and not as innocent as they came out as they were meant or were they, after all she had just been thinking about Lex in terms of sex, and whatever was shifting to her bedroom and the touch being more intimate. She needed Lex to talk about something. Her eyes locked with Lex as the blush creeped up her face.

Her apology was unnecessary but Lex knew that was a social expectation, that If someone says that they hurt you, you apologize. Her eyes widened a bit when Alex said that she would be more firm in the future when she touched her. The thought of Alex touching her again had a strange reaction on Lex, she didn’t quite understand, she would have to talk to Lena about it, she didn’t like unexplained sensations. Her brows pulled together and looked at Alex. She was a little flustered adding clarification of in the lab, but then somehow managed to then remove it saying or wherever. That caused another reaction. Her heart squeezed and then puffed out it was so strange maybe she was having some kind of cardiac irregularity. She moved her hand and touched Alex wincing. She gripped a little tighter the firmness of a handshake or massage a touch with conviction and purpose.

“I have over sensitive skin. This is unpleasant and painful like pins and needles. This is good, it needs to be meant, have a purpose, the only time it’s different is when my focus is split and then softer can be tolerated, Rain I like, not the touch I always have an umbrella but the smells of the wet city, the diffused light, the ability to walk and think without others being around, it is liberating, to be able to experience the world with less noise and confusion, because the other people avoid the wet.”

Lex didn’t really understand why she shared the last part. Lex pulled her hand back rubbing her thumb over Alex’s wrist. When Lex pulled her hand back she saw Alex swallow and she picked up the menu and her wine, when she saw the prices she downed the glass and looked back, blinking for a moment. She saw the hitch in her breath as Lex moved her hand away.

Alex’s heart had raced, her breath had hitched, the way that Lex had touched her was sensual, it may have been firm but it was not in any way painful, it was stimulating and exciting. A far cry from the rough treatment from Maggie, she understood the differentiations in what Lex was saying it wasn't about pain, hurting the other, the firm touch was about pressure, and enough to have intention behind the movements but what was Lex’s intention and why did she suddenly want it to be more sensual, and to continue. She swallowed and her breath hitched again as Lex moved her hand. She was aware Lex missed social cues and hoped that she would miss her body's reaction to her. She downed her wine and then looked at the menu.

“Jesus, I think drinking the calories is the better way to go here, did you want to split something maybe?”

She laughed lightly at Alex, she wasn’t sure if that was meant to be funny but it tickled her. Most of the desserts had a days calorie amount, Alex could drink she could tell, being punctuated by the wine but it would be several bottles.  
She motioned to the waitress and ordered the chefs selection and smiled at Alex.

“You would have to drink a number of bottles for the calories in most of these desserts, but why choose one when you can have it all? Please Alex don’t worry about the money”

Alex couldn't help but wonder just how many times someone had touched Lex and hurt her? How many times she had had to explain that the touch hurt, but then she remembered how she said people avoided her. A sadness came over Alex, people really didn't give her a chance and that was a misjudgment, Lex was interesting, curious, passionate and honest, she had many fine qualities, and she was so intelligent and beautiful, once night affairs seemed to be a waste of such a woman. Alex had so many questions for her, she was able to calm her own system and come back to her thoughts, the sensitivity was another bit of evidence to Lex. She wondered if there were any other sensitivities she was starting to piece together the information.

“Thank you Lex that is very generous, do you have any other sensitivities? Visual Audio? You still haven't explained the tapping, what it is or why?”

“There is no need to thank me Alex, it is fine. As I said it can be a business meeting as you have agreed to work with me. Do you know anything about twin primes? I am tapping them out, although maybe I will try piano music too, some topics are difficult, small talk, things about me, the repetition helps me focus.”

Lex took a drink and then refilled her glass, she was worried about the responses to the next question she had been managing, well, learning to control herself but this was a topic she should have stayed away from, it was very dangerous, her interactions with Clark had proven that. The more knowledge one has about her and her needs the more dangerous that person is. The last person she trusted with this was Clark and the result was her being taken by 7734. She needed a moment and looked up and called over the waitress.

“We will be having desert today please bring a menu”


	25. Rapid descent

CharMichaels (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:20………

Once Lex finished with the ordering she found her attention back to the previous interaction; Alex had been flustered and she didn’t really understand why there had been nothing to put the woman at unease. Was the line of questioning to destabilize her? To draw attention away from her unease? She dismissed this as some inner turmoil that was probably based on her accepting the position to work with kryptonite. She had remembered registering the way her breathing faltered. Lex was not tactile and rarely initiated physical contact; before when she was younger and had more manic phases she was quite flamboyant and charming but not since all the issues. That kind of hitch normally came with a disgusted look and an attempt to pull away; Alex had not but then she was trained to react differently. She had touched Lex first but maybe it was not okay for Lex to touch her, she furrowed her brow, the woman was so confusing. 

Some moment she seemed almost friendly towards her like she could see Lex; then it was like she was seeing the monster again. Lex thought to herself she wished she was just normal; she regretted it the moment she thought of it. The gaggle of voices hit. “Your defective-you were born defective, you’ll die defective, everything in between holds no interest to me” Lionel’s voice “Alexandra; don’t say such idiotic things, why would you want to be one of them, a sheep? When your Alexandra Luthor” Lillian barked then the soft cadence of Lena came to chance them away, “Lexi, you’re not broken, you’re special, you are my favourite person, normal is so boring, I love you as you are” Lex sighed as calm was restored and she looked at Alex, on hearing the question she cursed in her mind, Alex was closer to understanding she wasn’t normal than she thought. Alex Danvers indeed played down her intellect, she clearly understood Lex was on the spectrum. How could she explain the other fluctuations without showing her mood disorder too? And why did she want to?

“Well they can be a little now and then, it is mainly touch that caused difficulty not that it’s a common problem for the most hated woman in the multiverse; after all people are more likely to punch or slap me than offer a sensitive touch, it has its advantages I suppose”

Her turmoil and pain from the memories was pushed behind the facade that she wore, and she didn’t think that Alex would notice her eyes particularly, Lena always said they gave her away.

“The desserts are the best here, you will enjoy them”

Alex watched, Lex was trying to have a break she could see that, there was a need to have someone there to have space, she then seemed to get lost in herself, she was gone, her eyes unfocused, her hands tapping more furiously and then there was a small smile, she wondered what it was that caused a smile at that moment. She was clearly distressed before that moment, somewhere trapped in her own mind, she wondered if this was what she had seen before, the conversation in the DEO, she thought she had a migraine, then there were the same symptoms in the cafe. Alex couldn't say that she understood the reasoning behind the issues, there were some similarities, but she would need time to think about that. She didn't have time now. She remembered what it was like for Kara how she had been when she first arrived, over sensitive to everything how she felt when the sensory overload was too much. She reached out and held her arm, firmly and smiled softly. She wanted to put her at ease, she had years of experience with Kara and hoped that this would come in handy.

“Well these words seem strange but Lex Luthor you are spoiling me, you should try the chocolate cake, even criminal masterminds, hated by all deserve chocolate cake.”

Alex winked and hoped that this would be taken as it was meant as a joke to defuse the situation, she retrieved her hand and tried a number of other deserts. She didn't think that of Lex of course, she found that these perceptions seemed to just change and filter into awareness and she found that although that kind of change normally took effort the more time she spent with Lex the more her thoughts were changing and she was happy they were. It was pushing her to learn to be more curious about the woman for all her differences. She was an amazing woman.

“Kara struggled with her sensitivity, her difference when she first arrived here, we did things to help her, I would hold her to ground her and well, you know it’s her differences that have given her the ability to be a hero, the differences in you, the way you think and react, they could be the thing that sparks your curiosity to create a new renewable energy source or cure cancer. Your differences are what make you unique Lex, both of you have sisters that love you, great sisters that will help you change the world.”

Lex watched her and listened to her words. Watching her face and everything she could to get a better gauge on what was beneath the words. The words seemed to be soft, the tone gentle, the touch, the wink, everything about her seemed to be matched to Lex’s need, and her instability in a hope to help her? To make her feel better? Was Alex aware of what was happening enough to try to help her combat it, without really knowing?

“Well Alex money has no really attraction for me but it does offer me the ability to on occasion encourage interactions, most people don’t want to spend any time with me at all but are happy to tolerate me when I do something lavish, I am glad that all I had to do to enjoy your company was treat you to a meal”

The criminal mastermind was a bit of a stretch but she registered the way Alex said it and realized it was an attempt at humor, she chuckled lightly as she knew was appropriate and looked at the selection on the table. She placed a spoonful of what she knew to be a coconut chocolate torte in her mouth and closed her eyes, enjoying the sensation of the rich dark chocolate and sweet coconut mixing in her mouth, Lex had fewer things that she enjoyed than others but this was amazing. She listened to the information about Kara and tilted her head, superman seemed to have no such issues but then he had always been here. She smiled appropriately and appreciatively at the comment about Lena.

“Well the infamous superman fight was due to sensory issues more than anything else, that and the confounded man deciding that once again I was to remain on this earth, I have no idea why he won’t just leave me alone when he allows better people to perish”

Lex bit her lip she shouldn’t have said that, why did Alex have the ability to get her to talk so easily? She had a little filter as it was. This was the most dangerous conversation of all if anything that was going to push her over the edge it was this, talking about superman. She needed to think her hand rested on her thighs tapping the numbers, needed to distract herself. This was foolish, she was clearly more in need of a treatment than she thought her own hubris, making her think that she was learning to control it.

Lex had stated time and time again that she did not experience emotions like others, and then she went and said that, it sounded like depression to her especially if she had tried to kill herself, and did she really believe that things would have turned out better if Clark had not saved her, that they would would be better off without her, well there were plenty of people who believed that to be true and would give evidence to the statement, but Alex wasn't one of them, she was brilliant she just needed guidance. What must Lex think of herself for that to be true? She couldn't help but think that whatever was going on was not part of some plan, but the real Lex, she didn't know why she was chosen to have Lex reveal as such but she was glad.

"Maybe superman was watching, Maybe he could see your potential, something you can’t see." 

Alex said, taking a bite of the tort and then putting her fork down to rest her head on her hand; table manners thrown to the wind. She knew this was a nice place and that she should be mindful but at this moment she just wanted to really be present.

“I learned something over the years dealing with Kara and superman, they have this ability to see beyond what's underneath, they see the good spark in people no matter how deep it's buried. I mean there was so much evidence against lena time and time again and Kara defended her, like she just could see Lena was innocent, I mean she was in the end, but Kara could see that, even now even after the cage after the pain and the threats, Kara still sees it, she still loves her. Superman clearly believed that you were worth it, that you were worth saving. I mean look at me, I can't stand the thought that kryptonite exists, but I believe you can make a difference, that you could achieve something good, and I am going to be working on the very thing I spent years getting rid of, because I see good in you too. While I'd have to take a loan out to pay for this meal, breakfast monday is on me. If I am the one to pay for the food then you know it is not your money I am there for, it is definitely the company.,

Lex was already agitated with herself and her inability to say what’s on her mind at times and now Alex was given an opening to talk about that kryptonian. Reciting her numbers in her head, being careful not to mouth or say out loud Lex tried to calm herself, Alex was defending him as she would, but she didn’t know the truth of the situation. She thought about him and couldn’t work out what it was that connected them. This was a dangerous road.

“Well his inconsistency causes a lot of difficulty in my life, he is not god and should not interfere with others decisions”

Lex’s tone had a bite to it, her head was full of voices and torment, she moved her hand under the table to tap out the numbers so Alex wouldn’t see, the words were not loud she wasn’t sure if Alex even caught them as she continued to talk; she talked about Lena. Lena, she allowed thoughts of Lena in. Lex could not help the way she was she knew that, but she wasn’t like Lena, she wasn’t good, didn’t want to be a hero, she just likes to unlock mysteries, to make things and do things that other people don’t see the patterns behind, hers was interest based not altruistic. Lex looked up at her not expecting Alex to say something like that, she wanted to buy her breakfast, and show that she was there because she wanted to be? Why did Alex want to be there, it wasn’t necessary for the lift to work.

“My sister is worth it, she always has been as much as she was pushed and treated like she was a pariah in the Luthor house; no one could remove the bright spark of love in her heart, trust me they tried. she would hurt herself over others, she puts herself in harm's way to help; she frequently refuses to ask for support because she believes that it’s her burden; the legacy from my father, the board, me, she wants to help cleanse the world of it, if you’re looking for that in me it doesn’t exist. I am curious not a savior, looking for something to do with my mind not altruistic; and regardless of my intentions or lack there of my mind created everything that I have been accused of. I am under no illusion that people will ever see anything but that Alex, not that people get close enough to look”

Why did she care, what Alex thought? Why did she want her to make the effort to look? Why was being under her gaze both something she liked and feared, Alex was every bit as duplicitous as the Luthors, and as inconsistent as the Kryptonian's.

Alex had a realization that the direction of the evening had taken a very wrong turn. She couldn’t help but think that it was the conversation about superman that was causing it, she wished she hadn’t kept on. Lex was talking about herself in such a foreign way, but then she could follow that she didn’t believe that she was either good or altruistic. Now Alex had moved from monster to person to person with promise, to someone she was enjoying being with and could see potential in, no mother Teresa but still she was not the person she was painting herself as. With another burst of compassion, maybe a desire to connect Alex reached out and to the hand on the table and took it firmly in her hand she wanted Lex to know that she believed her, believed in her and more than anything wanted to really see her.

“Curiosity is an important part of human nature Lex, there are probably millions of ways to hurt, to torture, there is probably a perfect method for each living soul, human and alien. You are not making devices that are perfect for this, you’re not actively seeking out to hurt people. Curiosity had brought so many advancements, curious scientists split the atom, created electricity and much more. You are taking Kryptonite and trying to find what can be made of it, how it can help create energy, grow things, and who knows what else you might find because of your curiosity. You’re trying to help humanity not find lethal ways to hurt my sister and her cousin who you clearly hate.”

Alex paused and sought out the eyes of the Luthor, trying to ensure that she was able to digest her words and really hear her.

“Lex I am agreeing to work with you on the one thing that can cause serious harm to my sister, the thing I have feared all my life, to harness its power and see if it can do something amazing. If I thought that you were going to be actively working on both advancements and ways to hurt her, I would not be agreeing to this, it is because I believe you are not trying to hurt her, I am doing this. Hearing about this I didn’t react emotionally, I didn’t put you in a cell, I didn’t go after you, and that was because I believed you, so I stayed and had dinner, accepted the position. I think that you’re honest and open to things others are not and that you are a better person than you think, a better person than the voices in your head allow you to believe.”

Finally, Alex pulled back and polished off the wine in her glass. She'd just told Lex Luthor she believed in her innate goodness. She was starting to sound like her sister, where was her cynicism now? Where was the part of her that always looked for the other side, how had she moved to this position of what hopefulness? This had been such a very strange sequence of events.

Lex watched Alex expecting her frank and honest assessment to result in the red head finally understanding that good or bad Lex was just Lex. She wasn’t motivated by things other people were, money, power, political alliances, but everything she did was in one way or another destructive. At this point she would leave with whatever information she was here for. Instead her hand reached across and took hers again, she looked down to see the grip, the way she was holding her hand, firm as she showed with purpose, she was trying to convey something to her, and emphasizing the point with a physical connection.  
Lena explained to her once that people did this to offer sympathy, convey sincerity or to initiate some level of intimacy. Lena looked up at Alex who was clearly working up to a big speech and decided sympathy or honesty were the options, there was another squeeze to her heart, that strange feeling from earlier had returned.

“So you believe me to be Earnest Rutherford instead of Robert Oppenheimer?”

She tilted her head and contemplated that for a moment, her hand warming under the grip of Alex’s hand pulling her mind to the woman and that she was not opposed to either her company or her touch.

“What if I am neither Alex? What if I am something entirely different? I mean my inventions in the past have been created with a thought, not so much to see a need, fill a need; as I could do that better, or the pattern of that would work better if. Working with kryptonite I am not trying to see how I can change the world; hurt them or anything. I am studying something I do not understand to see what it can do, the reason I have so many different types with different properties; well that was because the pattern on green and gold were part of a sequence, I cracked it when I came across black and silver. The pattern was incomplete, I finished the sequence and now I want to know what they do”

She sat forward a little and looked into Alex’s eyes. Eye contact was hard but she was sure to hold it. Her voice was low and the tone somewhat velvety Lex was definitely affected by her; she needed to analyze this further.

“However your assessment of me, is far kinder than I would expect, you have surprised me again”

What if what Lex was saying was true, what if she was indeed something completely different, what if she was something in the middle and her curiosity led her to the place where she did hurt others, hurt Kara, not through malice or intention but through curiosity of how things worked in the field. She waited with some trepidation as she was speaking, she seemed to talk in cold hard facts, at least as she saw it. Alex listened intently.

“well then all the more important it is for me to be monitoring what is happening, to be involved, if that brilliant brain of yours comes up with electricity then that is a great thing for everyone, if it comes up with the atomic bomb then I will do everything in my power to put a stop to what you are doing. That is my function, I am here to work with you, to help you but at the same time I am here to stop you if your brain comes up with something evil, or nefarious.”

Alex couldn’t help the way even as she spoke, she was leaning towards the belief that things would be good, that she wasn’t just hoping for the best she believed that it would be good. She needed to make sure that her feelings towards the woman didn’t stop her planning for the worse. Assessing the threat and making sure there was a contingency. The waitress came by to check on them and ask if they were finished with the dessert and Alex gave a polite nod.

"I'm all good. Thank you, it was delicious." 

She waited for Lex to speak again, she needed to find a way to figure out how in the hell she was going to convince Kara that this was a good idea. That Lex should be allowed to investigate these new types and see what could be done with them, that there could be something good that came from the kryptonite, she was not looking forward to the task at all.

Lex looked at her and the way she sat back and narrowed her eyes. Lex knew that look, she had seen it enough times from Lionel. Alex was seeing her more clearly, she guessed, as defective, broken, a lost cause. She took a deep breath there was that pain again maybe she didn’t know if there was any point to asking Lena what that meant any more, when it was connected to Lionel it was the pain of rejection. She understood now, there was something in her that wanted Alex to like her. However she had given her a glimpse of Lex and the look said it all. She sighed and decided that she needed to squash the thought that anyone could want to know her, especially Alex. she was barely holding herself together at this point and she needed to leave. Alex started to speak, Lex heard the threat, the warning didn't frighten her, it just confirmed that she had been foolish to think that this uncontrollable variable could be someone who could understand her, like her maybe.

“You don’t understand Alex, you are attributing a desire to be good or bad, I am just Lex, my inventions just are, they are not conceived in good or evil, it doesn’t matter, you will either see what I mean or you will not”

Lex looked up at the approaching waitress, she smiled, Callie was one of her favorites, she didn't linger and she didn't make her wait to pay, she was always watching for the moment Lex was getting ready to go.

“Thank you Callie please use the normal card and a 20% tip thank you”

Lex stood and looked at Alex. She wanted to help her understand, but Alex flitted from what appeared to be kindness and a fondness for her to threats she was emotionally drained it was like whiplash in her mind. She couldn't stay any longer, she loathed the thought that she was leaving Alex with this thought she so wanted to have Alex to be different to like her too, but that was never going to happen the thoughts battered her down and she just couldn't hold out any more she had to get out she could feel herself retreating. Her mind pulling her in, she couldn't go back to that, not again.

“Thank you for your company, I will see you Monday”

“There are no creations that exist in a vacuum Lex, the atomic bomb was not an inert invention it was a killing machine it was designed specifically to terminate life on a massive scale.”

Alex was trying to get her point across she didn’t think that Lex was evil, was a monster but she also couldn’t comprehend the thought that Lex believed that with a lack of intention that the inventions would be harmless, she couldn’t just let Lex think that she would be able to go in and wing it, to not think about the impact, that she needed to make sure there was nothing that could hurt her sister, that rock was something dangerous and she wanted to ensure that it wasn’t going to be something harmful. She watched Lex, she was preparing to leave, she was showing more obvious signs of distress now, the thing happening within Lex she was not able to contain it. The brooding genius was clearly in distress she had not wanted to cause this, she just needed to be as honest as Lex had been. With the exception of Lex’s sudden change in mood Alex had learned a lot, had a lot to unpack and actually enjoyed time with Lex, it was nice not to have to second guess everything all the time.

“I’ll see you Monday Lex, I look forward to working with you”

She heard Alex’s conjecture that she didn't need a scandal and she didn't want to see her mother. She didn’t want her mother involved in anything, and with Alex on board she was in a very difficult position, if she did something Alex didn’t like it was clear that she would come after her, she wouldn’t find her but it would be an inconvenience.

“No the killing machine is a machine, it is inert and just an object, it is the will of man that makes it kill; it is the thoughtless and wanton need for destruction that makes it a killing machine. It is the intention of the man behind the machine that makes the distinction, if there is no intention the machine just is”

She didn’t want to have that particular conversation, after all she didn’t trust Lex, or Lena, government orders regarding her sister in their hands would not be taken kindly especially after the most recent discussion.

“Yes, Monday, as I said thank you for your company”

Remembering her manners before she turned to leave. Why was this Danvers girl a fascination she was dangerous and clearly nothing Lex could say would make her understand, she sighed and headed to the door hoping to be able to get into her waiting car, not be stood on the empty sidewalk, she needed to see Lena.

Alex couldn't understand why the evening went so wrong, so fast, and her head spun at the way that Lex although seemingly polite appeared to run from the restaurant like she was stung, something had happened, something that was not good and Alex was worried, every hair was standing up on the back of her neck. She wondered if this is what Kara meant by unstable, had something happened that pushed her into some kind of instability, she was working with Kryptonite, and right now she was definitely unstable, Alex could feel she needed to talk to Kara. she took out her phone and called her, the kryptonian didn't answer, she tried again.

“Kara, something went wrong at dinner, Lex there is something wrong, I need you to meet me as soon as you can, bring your rum. I think you will need it.”

Lex had gotten into her town car and managed to hit the call button on her phone to get hold of Lena, she couldn't focus, her mind was unable to process, she repeated the numbers over and over. She could feel the weight of Alex’s disapproval, the look in her eyes that brought back everything she had tried to forget , why she cared mattered less in this moment than the fact she did and that meant even more danger for Lex. Slumping in the seat she could feel herself retreating into her own mind. The phone slipped from her hand and she slumped back in the seat.


	26. Loving sister

Lena’s Penthouse (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:40………

Lena watched Kara get ready and leave she was amazed at how quickly her heightened level of arousal was quickly replaced by concern and anxiety, Kara and Lexi had not even met yet and there was something that was concerning Alex, Kara would be drawn into that, she wanted to give Kara a chance to meet her before she started hearing negative things. On top of that she was still holding the phone, connected to Lexi, but there was no conversation, no noise other than the sound of the car moving. She didn't know if Lexi was taken, if Alex had her, or if she was triggered and now not in a good place. Depending on how the evening went there could be two possibilities, she could be manic and fixated on something, that would mean she is on the way to the Lab, she could be going into depression and locking herself in her own mind or worse looking for a way to end her life. Lexi didn't know that Lena knew about that, she always allowed it to be malfunctions and accidents, she however knew her sister well enough to know that this wasn't true. She held the phone still with no sounds that helped just driving.

“I will find you Lexi, hold on for me please.”

Lena went to her bedroom and got some fresh clothes, and then moved to the safe to get out the experimental pills, she wanted to work on it longer, test it more but she needed to take it just in case, if Lexi has gone down she would need to have help to get back, and she would risk the pills before giving her over to her Lillian again. She grabbed a purse and headed out of the penthouse, she would get down to the street and get her car, she would be better off driving herself, especially if she was going to try and get into Lexi’s Lab. She needed to find her and quickly, she thought that Lexi may like Alex, and if that was true if dinner didn't go well then she would be affected. She needed to find her so she stepped out of the elevator and onto the street. As she did there was a town car approaching, it was Lexi’s she was sure of it, she ran forward and moved to the door, opening it to see Lexi curled into seat and muttering numbers she was going down and going down hard, the numbers were connected to Superman, she knew this, maybe they had been talking to Alex about the super, why would she talk about that with Alex she knows its a trigger for her? 

“Come on Lexi come with me”

She reached in and helped Lexi out of the car, she made sure to grip her tightly and not to hurt her, she moved slowly and made sure that she was in full view. Lexi was leaning on her heavily and still mumbling, she wouldn't let people see her like this, if people knew that Lexi could be reduced to this level of function people would use it against her. The doorman saw her struggling and came over, it was Mark, she trusted him and smiled instructing him on a firm grip and allowing him to help her and Lexi inside. Once she had her sitting on the couch in the penthouse, Lena pulled her into a hug, squeezing her tightly as tight as she could. The pressure would calm her and hopefully stop what was happening inside her sister's mind. She just needed a moment to get her back, a moment of clarity enough for Lexi to actually take the pill, she didn't know what would happen if she did but she hoped that she got this right.

“Lexi, your ok you are safe now, talk to me please”

Lena knew if she retreated completely she wouldn’t take the pill she had. She kept speaking softly hoping to get through to her, she wanted her to reach back to her, as Lena reached out for Lexi she just needed her to reach back just a little to help herself out of this place, this tormented place in her mind, she couldn't lose her not again, not now, not like this, she couldn't stand to see her so broken, she thought back to the treatments Lexi endured she was so strong but the more there were the worse her swings became, she was sure her mother was damaging her, and if she retreated completely the only way would be Lillian, she was the only one that could get her back. She wasn't sure if the medication she had made would work if she was already gone. Finally the moment she needed the sign that Lexi was still fighting, still trying to stay with her, she dropped the bag and finally wrapped her arms around Lena.

Lex was struggling, the images, the voices, the fight, the time in the sanitarium everything that was happening within her mind was pulling her deeper and deeper within herself. The feeling of her heart beating too fast, it being too heavy, the way her body felt listless, everything was hard, thinking, moving she had not even tried talking yet. She could feel Lena, the way she was a grounding tether, she was holding her, it felt like she was pinning her to the world, keeping her on this earth, keeping her with her. She wanted to stay with her, she wanted to be with Lena, she was the thing that Lex cared for most above everything. She tested her voice and a croaky noise came out, rough and raspy, not really words but sound at least. She failed a few more times before she managed to speak.

“I spoke to Alex Danvers....the hypothesis was wrong, she is too much of a wild card; I can’t work it out, she is fascinating; very clever, makes me talk, pushes me, she evokes all my problems and I can, I’m starting to control, I keep pulling myself back, then it went wrong, superman, kryptonite started to shout in my mind, images, voices and now I can’t stop it.”

They had talked about Alex and Lena had recognized the signs in her sister, she liked the older Danvers girl, she had not been interested in a singular human for a very long time. Lena worries Alex was not her greatest fan and despised her sister although Lexi had convinced her that Alex didn’t pose a physical threat, she still worried about the emotional. Here it was the emotional fall out, the current state of her sister, she was not sure if this was something that was healthy for her, she would never tell her to stay away from Alex, she wanted Lexi to be happy she deserved that, she deserved love, and there was something with Alex, she knew there was, maybe if the medication worked and offered Lex more stability that could be something that she could explore. 

“Lexi it’s alright what happened what does she know?”

Lex tried to focus it was hard, if she retreated completely she would be subjected to treatments or remain locked in her mind. The slower descent happened during her first heartbreak and she tried to kill herself so she didn’t live like that, but the quicker descent like this normally resulted in being trapped unable to communicate, she needed to focus on something that happened. What does she know? That's what Lena was asking. She needed to pull herself back and she focused on something good, something that she would latch on to.

“We went to dinner, she was interesting, she, she didn't lie, she admitted to trying to distract, working, working with you, we talked about, chocolate, science, music, she is insightful, she is curious, smart, it was nice, commonalities, rain, company with no awkward silence, she is attractive, and shy, she is also not confident”

Lena listened it wasn't so much what Lexi said, it was more the way, with fondness, she spoke like this mainly in connection to her, or science, she was sure that she liked Alex, but the night sounded good, although she couldn't imagine that Alex would be someone that Lexi could converse with so easily, Alex known for her sarcasm and joking more than clean conversation. She wondered how Lexi managed with that.

“Then about my work, asked her to work with me, invention, intention, good bad, superman”

It wasn't so much complete sentences, or deep insight but the words pointed to the course of the evening, they had been in conversations, general things like music and likes much like a normal date, and then when they started talking science and things they had in common they stumbled onto topics that were tricky, intentions and motivations always something that caused Lexi difficulty she was forced to do things at others intention when all she wanted to do was be left alone. With the addition of superman in the mix that would have been a step to far, Lexi had been dealing with so much change, the new position in the DEO, being back with Lena, meeting Alex, having to find new routines and places, hell the whole world was different, there was too much going on she had waited too long before treatment, Lena had taken to long.

“Lexi what are you working on?”

Lex shuddered as she thought about what she had told Alex, the way she reacted, she wasn't dismissive, but she was scared and unhappy with the idea that she was working on something that could harm Kara, would Lena react the same? She held tighter, she needed Lena she couldn't have her leave not now, would she be angry too, no Lena was a scientist she understood the value. She opened her mouth and managed to croak out just one word.

“Kryptonite”

Lena just held her tighter, she could imagine how bad that conversation went, she was not aware that Lex was working on Kryptonite although the information didn't really surprise her, she was the most renowned scientist working on Kryptonite. She had once hypothesized that there were many more types, and that was proven with the addition of the silver from the Daxamite invasion. She wondered just how many she would have been able to create and what they did. Lexi was brilliant; she had probably already mapped a significant amount. She was worried, obviously after all she had hurt Kara with the green kryptonite, and there was the incident with the red that caused a significant change in Kara according to the news. Any form of the glowing rock struck fear into the heart of her love. They had not even had a first date yet and if what Lexi said was true, Alex knew about it and was probably telling Kara, she would be coming for Lexi, she was going to be caught between the sister she loved and the woman she loved. She wouldn't let Kara take her like this, not in this state. She also couldn't let Kara get hurt by Lexi, she was not happy that there was Kryptonite, she had not even wanted to make the small amount to draw blood, she wondered what else the kryptonite would do to her. She was sure Lexi would have made it safe, she wouldn't just have it laying around but it worried her, she couldn't ask questions about it with Lexi like this. She pulled tighter around her.

“It is alright Lexi, I am here, I have some of the pills that I have been making, will you take them? It will help”

Lex couldn't manage to keep her thoughts in line, there was to many things assaulting her simultaneously, she couldn't remember how far Lena had gotten with the treatment, she had not tested it, would it be worse, a sudden memory of previous treatments, from her mother, from General Lane filtered into her awareness the pain the convulsions, the way her mind was hit over and over again with forced triggers that caused her mind to pull itself apart, how the synapses fired over and over, connecting areas that shouldn't be, infusing memories, thoughts and sensations in a confusing and unhelpful way, blending reality into a nonsensical and unfathomable mess. It was impossible to retrieve information, understand what was happening, the way her mind was no longer her own. Whatever this did, this treatment of Lena’s it couldn't be as bad, she may wake groggy and disoriented but there would be no synaptic firing caused by excessive electrical stimulus, no neuronal damage, from it. She wasn't sure how the neurotransmitters would be affected, the synapses flooding her mind with previous treatments continuing the depletion of the chemicals needed for balance making her more susceptible to mood disturbances. She pulled back to look into the face of Lena and nodded.

“Ok Lenabean I trust you, I will take it.”

Lena smiled and looked at her sister, she was happy that she was going to let her help, she moved away breaking contact and headed to the Kitchen to grab some water, once she had it she took the pills out of her purse. She wasn't sure exactly what would happen; she was trying to replicate the rebalancing of the chemicals in her brain and stabilize her without draining valuable and needed neurotransmitters. She wanted to restart her brain like a reboot, but without damaging the white and grey matter, without fighting the neurons haphazardly she was hoping that the pill would be able to sedate her and start a cascade throughout her mind, triggering the neurons in sequence without overloading her, and the additional inhibitors that stopped the reuptake of the neurotransmitters would be slowed to ensure the additional neurotransmitters she had placed in the pills would be able to increase the storage in the neurons. She wanted to get Lexi’s brain back to normal functioning, but also leave her able to communicate with the world outside. She had no idea if it would work the simulations said that it should but there was no guarantee. She gave her the pills and the water and watched as Lexi took them. She knelt by the couch and took Lexi’s hand holding it firmly and waiting.

Lex was sitting watching Lena, she could see the way she was looking at her, curious, anxious and with so much care. She wasn't sure why Lena was anxious, she was brilliant and if she believed that this would be of help then it would, she trusted her completely. She placed her hand on Lena’s cheek as she spoke softly.

“It’s alright Lenabean, whatever happens it is better than the alternative, don't worry”

Lex started to feel nauseated. She could feel her head starting to spin, it was a curious sensation and she tried to focus on it, but her mind was drifting out of her awareness. She felt like she was falling asleep but couldn't stop herself from entering whatever altered state that Lena’s pills had induced, she felt herself lose the ability to maintain her position and sloped down on the couch before her eyes closed and she was out.

Lena watched her as she fell into unconsciousness, she had expected that but she wasn't expecting it to happen quite so quickly, she moved Lexi’s position and made her as comfortable as possible before getting her pad and some neurological readers. She placed them on the temples of her sister and watched the readouts. The information she was getting regarding the levels of neurotransmitters, she was not sure that there was enough of the Acetylcholine, she worried that there would be a decrease in memory functions, this happened when ever her mother gave her treatment, she needed to increase the stimulation of this in phase two trials. Lex would not want there to be any impairment of memory, although she was sure there were things that Lexi would like to forget, her mind was brilliant and she would be frustrated with the inability to remember, failure being a massive trigger thanks to her father. The Dopamine was doing well, it would be at normal levels, Lexi should be able to continue her ability to learn and hopefully it would help balance her emotions, the numbers were dangerously low, depleted by the reuptake inhibitors from her mother's dopamine flooding. To many receptors not enough reuptake to continue to stabilize. She knew that this had a role to play in Lexi’s depression.

There was an increase in serotonin that she didn't anticipate, maybe the reason for the rapid descent into a sleep-like state that Lexi was now in. the Norepinephrine was starting to rise which she hoped would eventually bring Lexi back to her, it would wake her, she knew that Lexi had less arousal levels than others, and less ability to understand her moods, but if these transmitters returned to normal Lexi maybe facing a new challenge. The desire for connections, additional pleasurable moods, she thought about that for a moment, and then smiled, as long as it didn't push her to a manic phase that could be good, especially as she had an interest in Alex. although that was not necessarily a good idea, but it would be better than a full manic phase, Lexi as an IT girl was different. She was charming and flirtatious, there were many stories of her parties and interest in other activities. She laughed lightly, her mother hated that, but there was a chance it would alert her mother to a change, she needed to help Lexi maintain her social expectations, to avoid detection from her mother, If Lena’s treatment was to work she needed to be able to analyze and manage this without her mother's treatments.

Glutamate production needed to be managed, too much would definitely push Lexi into a manic phase that much excitatory hormone may cause an interesting change in behavior. She caught her thoughts and shook her head, there was her sister trusting her and she was treating it as a science experiment what's worse a sociological one, she needed to remind herself that playing with Lexi’s neurotransmitters needed to be done with Lexi’s involvement, she would share everything that she had with her, so that she could manage the condition in the way she thought best. She didn't believe there was anything wrong with Lexi, she was different, special and wonderful as she was, there was nothing that needed changing, she was more than willing to help her experience anything that she wanted in the world but she wouldn't impose it. She watched her and the readings as they seemed to stabilize, there was nothing that she could do now, not until Lexi woke, she wondered how things were going with Kara and Alex, she could only imagine what Alex would have taken from the information that Lexi had given to them.

She wondered if her next interaction with Kara would be less exciting, less pleasurable, she needed to make sure that whatever was happening between Alex and Lexi didn't ruin the new and exciting relationship that was developing between her and Kara. She should have introduced Kara to the real Lexi, she had told her about her but with Lexi spending all her time in her lab they had not come in contact with Leviathan since the new Lexi arrived. She wondered if she could have avoided this, she wanted to help Lexi be stabilized and in control, she wanted Lexi to have the opportunity to be fully in control when she met her, really met her, she was a super after all. She didn't want the meeting to go poorly; they were both so important to her, she yawned. She was tired, she needed to sleep. She held Lexi’s hand and she sat on the floor watching, she kept watch as long as she could until she finally fell asleep head resting on her joined hands. She was exhausted, but wouldn't leave her sister's side.


	27. You must be crazy

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 17-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:45………

Kara flew over to Alex’s Apartment and slipped in through the window, she looked around but Alex was not there, she listened and could isolate her heart beat she was just pulling up, Kara got out her scotch and a glass, she guessed that whatever it was that happened she was upset and that would most likely want a scotch, she had stopped for the Rum as requested but had no idea why Alex would encourage her to drink. She waited, she could hear Alex’s heart beating faster, but it was taking forever for her to get there, she knew it had not been long since she arrived, but Alex’s anxiety was rubbing off on her, there had been a heightened state of arousal in her so she was already susceptible to the emotion of her sister. As Alex opened the door Kara turned and watched her enter. She looked stunning, she had not seen Alex so dressed up in a very long time, probably since the valentine date with Maggie years ago. She couldn't help but wonder just how much Alex had wanted to impress Lex, and how much she must like her for her to go to this much trouble. She could see the worry etched on Alex’s face but there was also sadness, she couldn't understand what was happening, what had happened, she moved towards Alex and hugged her, she couldn't remove the anxiety or the sadness but she could hold her.

Alex had been mulling over everything that happened, she had been enjoying the time with Lex, each and every time she came into contact with her she seemed to enjoy her company more, she had never had anyone be so open and honest with her, she was direct, fascinating, and so beautiful, she shouldn't be thinking things like that not now, she didn't know what had happened, why things went south with the meal, something that she did not yet understand about Lex, something, she almost laughed at herself, there was so much she didn't yet know. She wanted to, she really did but if Lex couldn't control what ever happened today she could be dangerous, she could only hope that Monday she would be back to normal. Did she really just think that, she was still planning on going through with this even though things went so wrong. She finally rounded the last corner to her apartment and opened the door, barely registering Kara’s appearance before she was enveloped in a hug from her sister.

“Kara, good I am glad you're here, did you bring the rum? I think that you will need it.”

Kara wasn't sure what Alex meant, but she couldn't imagine why she would need Alcohol, she knew that humans often used alcohol when things were not going well or when there is a celebration, she could tell by Alex’s demeanor that it was not the latter, although she was not sure that drinking was something that would help her feel better, she didn't like that Alex used it this way either but that was a conversation that was for another time. She pulled back from her and nodded. She was wondering if the date had gone poorly? If it was a sister's need, misery loves company? She kind of hoped that it was something that simple but the fact that Lena had a call from Lex too, the date clearly had something to do with it, but there was something more worrying.

“I have but I am not sure why being drunk is going to help. Tell me what happened Alex, you look amazing by the way, I thought that this wasn't a date, date?”

“It was but it wasn't, I invited her out because she was asking about what i was doing with Lena, but then after I asked her again I meant it, I wanted to get to know her, and well she kind of turned it around and asked me, so it was easier for her, I think that she didn't believe me and needed to have some control over the situation. She looked amazing, she is stunning, have you met her yet? And so interesting, she is honest too in the strangest ways. It's like she had the ability to be completely who she is without any concern or embarrassment, she keeps telling me she doesn't experience emotions like others, but she is so passionate and she loved Lena so much, I think that she may have OCD or possibly Asperger's syndrome, but she is so intelligent and charming, unbelievably charming.”

Kara listened to her, wow that was unexpected, the spontaneous discussion about the best attributes of Lex Luthor, her sister clearly liked her, this was unexpected, although the look on her face was admiration and reverence, she was not sure how involved Alex was but she was worried, Danvers girls seemed to fall hard. This was something that Alex would possibly be uncomfortable with but still not enough to get Alex to call her to visit, to suggest Rum, after all Alex was close to figuring out some of what was wrong with her but that was not her place, it wasn't fair to talk to her about Lex. Kara couldn't handle alcohol once the shots in the bar left her pretty drunk, and well she didn't drink often enough to build up a tolerance. She wasn't planning on having alcohol for this. She needed a clear head, it was obvious that Alex didn't she was already attached to Lex.

“Ok well, I guess that is something that you have to ask her about, what happened?”

Alex was hoping that she could encourage a drink, something to steady nerves but she was sure that Kara was not planning on drinking, she took a deep breath and poured herself a drink. Downing two fingers before she looked back at Kara, there was not way that this could be softened, there was no way that the information was going to land well with Kara and there was no way that she wasn't going to monitor it, Kara would hate the plan, she would hate Alex working on this, but most of all, she would be worried. She looked at Kara and nodded towards the couch and took another two fingers with her. She sat down and encouraged Kara to do so but she just kept pacing.

“Ok, but you have to listen to it all before you say anything, we met for dinner and I had forgotten the reason that I asked in the first place, I had not come up with a better explanation to meeting with Lena, and well I was honest about it, I didn't tell her what we are doing but at the same time I admitted it was something that was different. Once that was out of the way, we started to have a nice meal and she offered me a job, in her lab working with her, she is analyzing and working with Kryptonite, she had multiple samples and they do a variety of different things, she had said I can help her to work out what they do, check the containment and well, make sure no harm is done. She wants me to meet her Monday and she will take me to the lab to inspect it and see what she is doing, she won't tell me where it is, and you won't be able to find me there, it's got a dampening field. Then we were talking about other things and she seemed to struggle and was showing signs of distress, she made a very quick exit and I tried to follow but she was gone, I am not sure she was ok.”

Kara had nodded she had agreed to the terms but at the same time she was worried, she was doing well with the story right up until the thought of Alex working with Lex she was going to speak and clenched her jaw. The moment she mentioned the Kryptonite Her eyes widened and her pacing increased, she clenched her hands into fists and looked at Alex. Not only was Alex agreeing to go into the lab but she was thinking of doing this alone and with no way of her finding her this was not acceptable in any way. She continued to pace, she knew that from past experience any mention of Kryptonite had her react strongly, it had caused issues with her and Lena she didn't want it to cause issues with Alex. She started to take deep breaths wanting to calm herself, to allow herself to think, not react as she normally did in this situation, however this was not easy.

“Alex why would you agree to that? You must be crazy if you think I am going to let this happen, Working with Kryptonite is something that can hurt me. With a woman that is not stable, who was clearly unstable as she left, we can't track you, you would be alone, what makes you think she won't hurt you? That she won't use this as an opportunity to take you? What if she is plotting to kill me or Kal? Why would you put yourself in danger?”

“She won't hurt me, and she wont hurt you, she does have an issue with Clark but I don't think that is her interest here. She wouldn’t do anything to hurt Lena, nothing at all, she would die first I have seen it, her need to protect Lena is as strong as mine is to protect you, can't you see that if I am in the lab, if I am there I can protect you, and she is looking at energy and agricultural uses for the kryptonite. If she had a plan to kill you she wouldn't have told me.”

Alex didn't know how to convey what she knew in her heart, that Lex didn't want to hurt her, she couldn't explain it but she was a hundred percent sure that there was nothing about this that was designed to hurt her. She wanted Kara to understand that she was not a threat not the way she thought, she couldn't explain how she knew that, but every fiber of Alex’s being knew that Lex would no more hurt her than Lena, she was amazed at the moment that she realized that Lex, had been honest and open and as much as she said she was not emotional, she somehow cared about Alex, not wanting to hurt her or Kara. She watched as Kara's face showed anger and anxiety.

“How can you know that? Kal was her best friend, and she tried to kill him, more than once, you, what are you to her? I can't let you go in there with no protection Alex it is a unacceptable risk, maybe brainy can find it, we now know that it is covered with a dampening system, we could look for somewhere we cant see, to find possible locations, go in and remove the kryptonite take it away, I don't know what her intention is, but she is not taking you and she is not going to continue working with Kryptonite, we have to put a stop to this, and I will not risk you.”

Alex thought back to the conversation with Lex, she had said that there was no intention that people always put intent on her curiosity and that was not what was happening. She remembered the information about the superman attack, and how that was not through her intent. There was corruption that happened not only to her inventions but also to her mind, her health, her freedom. The ideas that Lex was having were amazing and there was potential for a multitude of reasons. She wanted to see what happened and she didn't believe that Lex was going to hurt her in any way. She needed to convey this to Kara, to make her understand.

“Lex doesn't have intentions like that, she is not someone who is planning to do good or bad, she is curious, the fight with Clark was an accident, a facet of general Lane's interference. I can't explain it as well as she did to me, but at the same time I believe her, that she isn't planning to do anything, she just wants to know what it does, she has already found some amazing abilities. I will be as safe with her as I would with you, or Lena. I don't know why I know this but I do, it's just a feeling, as for brainy I am no longer a member of the DEO and on top of that, Lex is the director, it's not like we can do that without her knowing and then she could remove the offer. Is it not better to know it's safe, that there is someone there checking, making sure that there is nothing harmful, she already knows if I see a threat it will be stopped but she invited me in anyway Kara.”

Kara and Alex argued for what seemed like forever the more Kara pushed the more that Alex defended Lex, the more she could see that she was indeed in complete belief that Lex was not planning on hurting her and that there was nothing that she wanted to achieve other than knowledge. She was also convinced that Lex had more emotion than she thought or acknowledged, she could see the emotion within her, she could see how she had a hard time with them, but they were there. Kara was getting to the point that she was starting to accept that Alex was not going to change her mind and she was starting to see that having Alex on the inside meant that they could keep an eye on what is happening. She looked at her and smiled, taking her hand and looked into her eyes. She couldn't believe that she was doing this, but she was going to advocate for Lena, for Kara to talk to her about everything so she could explain, help her to understand.

“Kara I know that the idea that Kryptonite is out there is scary and that it could cause a problem for you and Clark, but if I am in there I can make sure that what I feel is right, that if something is wrong I can be there to stop it, you can talk to Lena, she hasn't told Lex about helping you the secret base, maybe it is time for everything to be out in the open, tell Lena that Lex has Kryptonite, see what she thinks, I may not have known her long, but I believe her and trust her, but ask Lena, believe her? See if the reason behind them hiding things is because she doesn't trust her? I have a feeling it is something else, every time there are discussions about Clark Lex seems to become less able to keep herself calm.”

Kara stopped, she looked at Alex, she was amazed Alex just asked her to talk to Lena, to get her opinion to take her opinion over Alex’s she wasn't sure what to say but it completely deflated her, she just looked at her and smiled softly, the argument was over she could see that not only that but there was a bridge, a bridge between the two women she loved most and that bridge was Lex Luthor, this was the strangest day, the most incomprehensible end to the day. There were a few more tears and a few more hugs before Kara agreed and headed out of the window. She was going to go to Lena, she would do as Alex suggested. She flew back to the penthouse and landed on the balcony. The door was open and she looked in and saw Lena slumped on the floor holding the hand of Lex, her body resting on the couch and a pad in Lena’s other hand, it appeared to be readings from the transmitters on Lex’s temple. She slowly slipped in and placed her hand on Lena’s shoulder.

“Kara, Please don’t she isn't trying to hurt you, please I am trying to help her, the treatment will help.”

The plea came out as she saw Kara, she wasn't sure why she was here, but her eyes were red and she could see that she had been crying, Alex had told her, and she was here, she wouldn't let Kara hurt Lexi. She couldn't lose her. She moved a little to make sure that she was between Kara and Lexi.

“I am not going to hurt her, is she ok? Alex was worried, can I help you to put her in the bedroom and ask a few questions?”

Lena wasn't expecting that, not only was Kara calm, she was offering to help Lexi, and she was here, Lena smiled, her face bursting with the hope and happiness in her heart. She was not sure what happened with her and Alex but something had. She nodded and watched as Kara lifted Lexi off the couch softly and cradled her in her arms, carrying her to the bedroom and placing her on the bed arranging her comfortably. Lena took her hand and led her back to the couch.

“Lexi became unstable at the dinner, she needed to have something to stabilize her, she was hitting a depressive episode, I have given her something to ensure she doesn't disappear into her mind, or need to have a treatment from our mother. She told me what happened, and that she is working with Kryptonite, she has always been interested in its properties and previously hypothesized that there were about as many types as there are elements, she had made a number, and she isn't trying to hurt you, she had offered to let Alex work with her, the problems happened in trying to explain herself and discussions about superman.”

“Why haven't you told me? And why haven't you told Lex about working with Alex and me on the super friends project?”

Lena listened to the question she was not sure what she should say, she had promised that she would not lie, but she didn't want Kara thinking that Lexi was too unstable to work with kryptonite as much as she didn't like it she knew that taking away her work would cause Lexi so much stress and difficulties. She would make sure that it was safe personally, she wouldn't let anything hurt Kara but she couldn't have Lexi hurt either.

“I knew of her interest in Kryptonite but didn't know that she was working on it again, she had said that Alex agreed to work with her and I will check it specifically, I didn't tell her because I need to know my treatment works before talking to her about something that will cause her difficulties, and as much as she is trying so hard to manage with all the change, supers will be a trigger for her, I needed to know I wouldn't hurt her before I told her. I promise that she is not trying to hurt you Kara, and Alex will watch everything closely, please don't take her work away from her, I have only got her back recently.”

Kara smiled and then nodded pulling Lena closer to her and holding her in her arms she kissed her temple and smiled. She would not hurt her, she wouldn't stop Lex unless needed, she was going to trust Lena and Alex. She smiled and changed the subject.

“Ok I trust you, and Alex, Lex will take time, but I do, now as for tomorrow, or later tonight, can I get you a corsage or is that not quite right for this kind of event?”

Lena sighed and held her tightly, there was a reprieve, for now, and she was more than happy for the break. After an hour of soft cuddles and conversation Kara was leaving again, and Lena went into the bedroom and curled up next to Lexi holding her close, the readings looked good, she just needed Lex to wake.


	28. Breakfast Luthor style

Lena’s Penthouse (National City) 18-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

As Lex’s mind drifted back into consciousness she became aware of a number of things, she was rested and felt alert, there was no grogginess there was no pain. The next thing that she noted was there was someone wrapped around her, she was not accustomed to waking like that, there had been a number of ethically promiscuous nights but there was never anyone in the morning. She focused her mind on the night before, she had been having dinner with Alex, her mind started to enter a difficult area and then her mood took over, she hated that the moods from her emotions could affect her so badly even though she didn't experience them as others, they still managed to have a profound effect. She had spiraled quickly into a negative space causing her mind to retreat. She had come to Lena, taken her treatment, and she had lost consciousness. Lena, she was still with Lena, a memory stretching back many years entered her mind, Lena when she first arrived, sneaking into her room afraid, she had stayed with Lex, and she cuddled her. Lena was a cuddler, it was many times over the years that Lex woke with Lena holding her. She was never sure if the process was for her or Lena, but it was a strange and curious action that always left her feeling safe.

Lena felt Lexi move slightly she knew that she was awake, but she was not ready to let go of her yet, as much as Lena understood Lexi’s aversion to physical contact, she herself craved it, and she knew the thigh embrace would not be hurting her, she loved the way that it felt to be able to hold her like this, she wished that she was able to do this more but she would never do that to her. Above all her own need and desire to be close to her sister, she put her sisters feelings and pain, she would never want to make her something that she was not and she would never want to hurt her, she moved back and smiled at her making sure not to touch her lightly in her retreat.

“How are you feeling Lexi?”

“You are aware that my feelings are not the same as yours Lenabean, however you kept me here, you managed to help me, you kept me with you and there appears to be no adverse effects of the treatment, my memories appear to be intact, there is no missing time, and I have the ability to access my thoughts and memories with no intrusion from the previous issues, you could say that I am operating at peak capacity, although I am hungry.”

Lena listened to the overall evaluation of her stats, she was amused, sometimes Lexi could be unintentionally humorous and she was very literal, she could have simply said that she was ok, or good but that was not Lexi. She almost laughed as her statement about being hungry was punctuated by Lexi’s stomach making a dramatic entrance, she looked at her and smiled softly, it was early but for Lexi this was almost time for breakfast, her body had become accustomed to regular meal times that formed her routine.

“Well Hungry, I am Lena, and I would be happy to make you breakfast. What is it that you would like to have to eat today? Do you have a specific thing on a Saturday or do you feel up to winging it?”

Lex completely missed the joke looking at Lena seriously, was she having some kind of memory loss, she started to calculate anything they came in contact with that could have caused such an issue. She could feel the way that her heart rate increased and there was additional pressure building around her heart as if someone was holding it and squeezing. She couldn't lose Lena, she had done too much to make sure that she was there with her, she had gone against her mother's wishes, bringing her here, she had allowed her to take back her position, another defiance of her mother. She was not ready to lose her and needed information if she was going to help her, she started a number of questions. The questions came out quick in a large spiel not waiting for the answer.

“You know my name is Lex? Why would you introduce yourself to me?  
Have you bumped your head? Did you touch anything in the lab that was marked with caution, have there been any unusual strain on you lately? Have you been subject to any injectables, injectables or gasses that could impair your neurological functioning? Have you been Subject to any assassination attempts or any other bodily harm? Have you been out of the country?”

Lena didn't mean to but she couldn't help but laugh, she could see the concern etched on Lexi’s face, she had made a bad joke and it had prompted such worry. She could see from the questions that Lexi was anxious about her response and she needed to explain to make sure that she didn't cause a relapse into last night's issues. Although the responses seemed practical and diagnostic in nature, she could see the emotion behind them. She bit her lip and calmed her reaction.

“Lexi I am more than aware of who you are. It was a bad joke, what people call a dad joke, something that is generally bad and told to lighten the mood. In this case I was introducing myself because you declare yourself as hungry, so I introduced myself, I am not hurt or in any way compromised, well except for my poor humor. Just breathe, Lex ok, I am fine.”

Lex tilted her head and looked at her; she took a breath as requested, she continued to listen to her. She was not comfortable with her misinterpretations and lack of understanding but she was somewhat used to it. She always had difficulties with humor, although sarcasm had a beauty and a rhythm to it she often missed it, analyzing it after and finding its methodology quite intriguing. She ran her hand through her hair and looked confused. If it was indeed a dad joke, was it something that her father had once attempted?

“Oh, so you were being funny, I am still not good at that and with no one here to take a cue from I didn’t know to laugh, I don’t remember dad telling jokes, but then I probably didn’t realize them either”

Lena thought about their father, he was a slimy unpleasant man, something that she had always wanted to stay away from, he had not been particularly funny, caring or in any way a good father, although he had taken a interest in Lena, it was not reciprocated, Lex had spent years trying to get him to notice her but it always ended in failure. She had never quite understood why it was important to Lexi, but she had always fallen short, ironic considering the short sighted nature of their father.

“No father didn't tell jokes Lexi, it is a classification like sarcasm and slapstick humor. The joke wasn't funny and if there were people here I doubt that they would have laughed, come on I know that you need to eat soon, it is time for breakfast.”

Lex started to get up still dwelling on the information. It was a curious thing humor, it had not been something that Lex had ever been able to fully understand. She followed Lena into the kitchen as she thought about it, she wouldn't normally waste time on such endeavors but she had noted that Alex made a lot of jokes, she didn't understand them but recognized the look of her face that suggested it was humor. Lex shook her head a little.

“So a joke is supposed to be funny and make people laugh but there is a whole catalogue of jokes called “dad” jokes that are bad and don’t make people laugh, why create a group of jokes that are not funny and waste time cataloguing them into a group, a subsection of jokes, when they are not fulfilling the original criteria for the main function, it’s like having a spanner set and then a round headed spanner that doesn’t grip”

“I guess it’s because they’re supposed to be funny but they’re that bad that they’re not. Though I’m sure some people do find them amusing. They usually just cause people to roll their eyes amusedly. Some are so bad they are good, sometimes it is just the mood that you are in that makes them humorous.”

She would definitely not be using dad jokes again, mainly due to the fact of how bad they were and how she definitely shouldn’t be using such boring humour. The other thing was Lexi had a point if she was going to use humour with Lexi then it should at least be something that was good, so that if she was going to try to imitate it she was not telling bad jokes, Lexi was too intelligent to be seen as a punner or spouting dad jokes.

Lex listened, her stomach rumbled and she remembered the reason for this strange conversation. She was indeed nearing the time for her breakfast although at the moment the delay in her schedule was proving less problematic that the thought that she would like to understand humor better to be able to communicate with Alex more effectively after last night she was sure there would be no more interactions with the woman but Lex wanted the next one to be more successful. For some inexplicable reason the woman continued to occupy an ever increasing part of her mind.

“Well pleased you meet you Lena, shall we get food?”

Lex wondered if that would be a dad joke? She didn’t really understand it but she felt that was an appropriate response based on the information she had gathered from Lena, she had extrapolated the rhythm and pattern for these bad dad jokes, and formulated a response to match the pattern.

“Preferably before my stomach continues the conversation”

Lena chuckled softly at her words, her sister was Adorable at times. She loved the way that her mind worked, the joke that she used had been restructured to fit the pattern that Lena had used, the addition of the comment regarding her stomach was also quite funny, Lexi often felt like she didn't fit in and she was often unintentionally funny, although this was an attempt at being funny on purpose, she liked it when she tried something new.

“Yes, let’s. What would you like to eat today, Lexi?”

Lex smiled, Lena had laughed she must have got that bad joke thing right. Following her down to the kitchen Lex hummed to herself she was composing something in her mind but wasn’t sure what it would be. She was feeling quite relaxed, the heavy feeling the squeezing in her heart was gone, and her body felt free, less tight, whatever Lena had done this was an unexpected side effect it was like the best night's sleep following a massage and a long soak. Lex remembered Mother shouting at Lena for making them and she hadn’t seen her do it since, she had always loved the games they played even if her mother didn't think it was something that was a fruitful endeavor.

“Oh I think that I would like some pancakes, do you still make them? I am feeling less heavy that’s good I will be ok again after I eat I think”

Lena had not made pancakes with Lexi for a long time although she had in the past made them for Kara although the way her and Lexi used to do it was different. She bit her lip and smiled as she started gathering the ingredients. She smiled and winked, as she made the batter. Once she was ready with the frying pan she looked at her and raised her brow.

“Flip and spin, flip, or no flip?”

Lex looked up at Lena and tilted her head. She was smiling softly as she remembered their games, the ones that got them into trouble as children. She would not miss the opportunity for this, not now there was no-one to interrupt their fun.

“I can’t imagine that is a serious question Lena? After all the best part is watching you flip, can you still spin or will it end up on the floor?”

Lex watched Lena, the determination on her face was classic, she recognized it. Lex raised her brow, the pattern of the pancake flipping the timing the movement mentally calculating Lena’s chances with each toss, the trajectory of the pancake and the timing the precise movements, it was always Lex’s favorite part, seeing how many Lena could do perfectly how often gravity beat her. There were signs of happiness on Lena’s face, she was enjoying this domesticity as much as Lex herself was finding the activity comforting like an old routine.

A wide grin spread across her lips. She shook the frying pan to make sure the pancake wouldn’t stick to the bottom and so that it was ready to flip. She took the challenge with reverence, she was more than happy to try the flip, if she was still able she would be able to manage the flip and spin, it had been many years but she would try just to see a smile on Lexi’s face.

“We will have to find out, won’t we?”

She turned and threw a grin to Lexi before focusing on the pancake. She calculated how much force she would need to use and how to direct the pancake before letting it fly up into the air. She was sure that even after all this time a simple flip would be possible. She watched it spin and moved the pancake in the right place below before catching it, breathing a sigh of relief at managing it for the first time. She turned to Lexi and grinned raising her brow, waiting for the assessment that she knew would be coming.

Lex grinned at her, she was sure lena was asking a rhetorical question so didn’t answer she instead watched as Lena flipped the pancake over and managed to catch it. Her smile grew as she looked at her sister, she analyzed the throw and the way that it flipped watching every movement of Lena and the pan, along with the part cooked batter flipping in the air, she watched as it landed in the pan, slightly off center but still flat and ready to finish.

“3.5 flips at a 75• angle a little slow but you caught it. Although you will have to increase speed and angle along with height if you are going to spin, there is a 87.63% chance of you do it the same and spin the pancake will hit you in the arm”

Lena listened and Laughed she was used to the analysis from Lexi and she was more than happy to reinstate this old game. It was always something that they shared, there were not many things like this that she had in her life. She was one of the very few people that connected with Lexi and it made their bond special, so very special. She raised her brow and smiled putting the pancake to one side, and started the next, she would spin, she was almost sure that she would be able to do it.

“87.63, that gives me a 22.37% chance that I will make it, not great odds but hey I am ready to take that risk.”

Lex raised her brow, Lena was not a risk taker, not really she was intelligent and careful she planned things well and executed them well, she wouldn’t try something if she couldn’t do it, Lex was fairly sure that Lena believed she was still able to perform this task. She held her breath as she watched, the pancake was higher but not high enough, it was spinning a bit too fast and the trajectories were wrong and it would be folded. Lex could see the end result before it happened and started to giggle. Lex couldn’t help but laugh, she was enjoying the experiment but she was indeed hungry.

Lena watched and felt the pancake hit her arm just as Lex predicted, she should have known better to bet on a calculation by Lexi. She laughed with her. It was an amazing thing to hear Lexi laugh, she was so free in that moment and Lena decided that even if the flip and spin didnt work the result was better than if it had. There was plenty of batter and she focused on cooking for a moment as she smiled to herself.

“Well so much for a calculated risk, here start eating”

“Mm ok as long as I can watch it’s good mental exercise for my brain, and it’s funny watching you get covered in batter. How do you do that? How is it you can imbed yourself in my world and make it feel different, make me different?”

Lex smiled there were not many things that made her laugh really laugh, but Lena always had a way to get into her world and make it brighter. Lena always seemed to do so effortlessly and she was very grateful for the connection that they had, she had missed it greatly when she was missing from her life.

“It's simple Lexi, it's because I accept you as you are and I am grateful for all the time and connection that we have, you're very special to me Lexi.”

“As you are to me, Lenabean”

Kara’s Loft (National City) 18-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

Kara had not slept following the fight with Alex, then seeing Lena, she was so concerned for Lex, she could see just how vulnerable she was and she was more concerned with what could happen should Lex degrade, she could become quite the threat. She had decided that it was better to take her mind off things for a while. Eliza and Jeramiah had always taught her to focus on something specific to help when she was struggling with too much stimulus, in this situation it was too many thoughts but she hoped that it would work. She had picked up some white roses, and some other items to create a variety of items and had been working on them.

She studied each rose and found a matching one so that she could turn the white roses into replicas of those on her suit. She was focused and carried on painting until the whole bunch of roses were painted perfectly, she could place each one over the flowers on her suit, they looked as though they had been plucked straight from the suit. Once they were all finished she decided that she would drop off a number of options for Lena, she would get her some coffee too. A perfect three rose corsage painted to have grey accents. A two rose pin painted the same. Three on a comb for her hair and four single painted roses. She smiled at her handy work. It would tie the two outfits together perfectly, she would use emerald jewelry and have Alex weave some emerald ribbons through her hair, they would look like two parts of the perfect picture. She took off and headed to Noonans, gathering the coffee and heading to the balcony. She placed the items on the table when she was distracted by the sounds in the kitchen. She looked through the glass and saw Lena and Lex in the kitchen.

She shouldn't be intruding on this moment she knew that but she couldn't help it, they were talking about jokes, and Lex was trying to understand, Kara remembered how hard it was for her in the beginning, and how she still finds some jokes harder to understand. The way people laugh at her when she misinterpreted things. Alex was the one that always explained and she watched Lena doing the same for Lex. it was a sweet moment between them and reminded her of her own relationship with Alex, she wondered what it must be like for Lex, to feel different to everyone like she did but at the same time, she had a explanation a reason, Lex was human, she didn't have the same, she didn't belong because her mind worked differently. She couldn't help but feel a strange kinship with her. She shook her head this was not what she should be thinking.

She continued to watch as they moved on to making breakfast, the laughter and the analysis of the spreads and trajectories, Kara could easily follow, and watched she too concluded that Lena was not going to make the spin. She watched as Lex started laughing, it wasn't the forced laugh that she had expected when Lex was male, he would use a maniacal laugh to patronise, a mocking sound, this was melodic and quite unexpected and the smile that erupted on Lena’s face before she laughed was amazing. The whole situation was completely unexpected and quite beautiful really, when she heard Lex talking to her about how Lena made the world better and Lena’s response she felt a lump in her throat and she wiped away a stray tear. They really did love each other much like her and Alex. She flew from the balcony sending a text to tell lena of the coffee and watched her take the coffee and the flowers in, she had shown Lex who was quite complimentary of them she smiled and turned to fly away patrolling as normal.


	29. First steps

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 18-03-2020 Earth Prime 17:00………

Alex sat in her apartment, she had been unsuccessful in her attempts to meet with Lex. She wasn't happy with the way things had gone the night before, she couldn't tell exactly what it was that caused the issue but at the same time she had upset her and that didn't sit well with her. There was something about Lex that made Alex want to protect her, she had defended her against Kara and she had believed everything she had said. She had spent some of the time wondering if there was something that Lex was doing to her to so easily change her mind on things, so many beliefs just changed in her. It was like the effect Maggie had once had, changing her opinions of Aliens with small nudges in the right direction, however with Lex there was no nudging. She had been open, honest and she had been almost actively trying to get Alex to see her as less than what she was seeing her as. Was this some amazing manipulation? Something that caused Alex to look deeper, something that she wouldn't have done if Lex had been accepting of her praise or what she had expected. Lex was surly bright enough to do so however she seemed to have little interest in people in general. 

When she had not turned up at the Café for her normal time Alex began to feel a strange feeling of concern. What had happened to Lex was her fault and she wanted to undo that, she also wanted to get to know her better, she was starting to think that although Lex would never be as interested in her as she was in Lex, she was sure now that she had Asperger's syndrome, Kara had not admitted it but she saw the acknowledgment in her silence. That meant that the way she was feeling about Lex would not be returned. She found her beautiful, interesting, intelligent, charming and above all else honest. Alex liked that about her. She liked it alot, she wanted to take more time to get to know her. She also felt like there was so much more to her. She cared about Lex, and she had to admit she was attracted to her, the thought was initially rejected however the more time she had spent with her the more she had to admit it to herself. She had tried the number Lex had given her a number of times each time it went straight to voicemail. She even thought about calling Lena at one point but given that it was her that upset Lex she didn't think that would be favorable communication.

There was a knock on the door and Alex pulled herself from her thoughts, she moved to the door and opened it to find Kara with a garment bag. She pulled her brows together as she opened the door to let her in. she cursed herself at forgetting, and looked at her watch five thirty right on time, she was supposed to help Kara get ready for her date with Lena. she smiled and hugged her trying to cover the fact she didn't remember and closed the door behind her.

“Alex, what is wrong, your heart rate is off your worried about something, we are not going to have another argument are we? I told you that I love Lena and this date is really important to me, if you can’t help me without another fight I can get ready on my own”

“No, Kara that isn't it, in honesty I forgot, I have been worried about Lex she was alright when she left last night and she didn't go to the café today which is part of her routine, I am concerned what ever happened she is not ok”

Kara understood, the moment that Alex mentioned Lex, she had seen how she had defended her, it reminded her of the way it was with her and Lena in the beginning, her seeing something in Lena that others didn't. The way Alex was dressed and the subsequent defense along with this anxiety over her welfare told Kara that Alex liked Lex a lot more than she thought initially. She smiled at her sister and placed her hand on her shoulder. She was not sure how much to say as Alex was always telling her not to eavesdrop, not to use her powers to invite people's privacy but at the same time the information that she had would help her sister with this anxiety. She bit her lip as she moved away, placing her suit over the couch and picking at her sleeves. She saw Alex watching her and she would know that she was hiding something, she was always able to read her. If it caused an issue she would have to deal with it, the information she had would help her sister.

“I went to Lena after leaving here last night, she was with Lex, Lex was unconscious and Lena was sitting on the floor holding her, she had given her a treatment to help her become stable, something less violent than that of Lillian's treatments. Lex told her about the Kryptonite and the dinner and she thought I was there to hurt Lex. Lena looked so broken, so vulnerable, so did Lex, she pleaded with me not to hurt her, but she didn't need to, the moment I saw how Lena cared for her my anger dissipated.”

Alex watched as Kara spoke still picking at her sleeve, there was more to it than this, although the thought that Kara wasn't going to actively go after Lex because of Lena was very comforting, it was a strange dynamic, Lena was safe because of Kara, Kara was safe because of Lena, Lex was safe because of Lena and Alex because of Kara, all of them invested in another, although Alex was also invested in Lex’s wellbeing and would do her best to keep her safe, she still had in the back of her mind that if anything went wrong she would have to stop her, but she wouldn't hurt her. The knowledge that Lex had a treatment was not comforting, that she needed to be destabilized, she wondered what Lena had done. She knew that Lillian and Lane had used ECT and chemicals, Lex being unconscious could have been through ECT but Kara said that it was kinder than Lillian's, how kind could it be when Lex was unconscious?

“What did Lena do to her? Why was she unconscious? Is she awake now? Kara you know something else, what happened is she ok?”

Kara heard Alex’s worry, the tone and the speed at which she was speaking, she could see that Alex was worried and decided that there was more harm being done from her being quiet at this point, but she still wasn't sure how Alex would feel about the spying, although it was her girlfriend she was watching, maybe it wouldn't be so bad. She smiled and looked at her before starting a little hesitantly.

“Well, um… I may have, um...seen her again this morning when I was dropping off coffee. I had not planned on um, stopping just delivering the flowers I made and coffee. But Lex and Lena were talking and well I couldn't help but listen. They were laughing, and joking, and they were talking. She was fine, and they are really close, like we are. Lena is so much like you, trying to help Lex understand like you do for me, she was upset because she didn't understand but then Lena helped her, it was….. It was sweet”

“Kara you shouldn't have been using your powers like that, but I am very glad that you told me I have been worried that I destabilized her and that it could lead to problems for you and Clark”

Alex relaxed, she was relieved that Lex was ok, that she was recovering from whatever happened, she was also glad that Lena had helped. She had witnessed first hand how much they cared about each other in isolation, she was a little jealous that Kara had been able to see them interact and hear what they were saying. The moments she witnessed in the café were so sweet so tender at times, she had not been able to hear what was being said but she had wished that she could, if she had Kara’s gifts she would have been able to do so, she couldn't help but wonder if she could have would she have listened in, she knew that she was so intrigued that she would have, so she couldn't blame Kara.

“I’m glad you told me, but try not to eavesdrop, I know its hard and there have been times that I would have been tempted too, we need to get you ready”

“You like her, it isn't just the concerns you have for me and Clark is it?”

Alex started to flush, her sister was terrible and hadn’t noticed for nearly four years that Lena liked her but the moment that Alex started to think about anyone in a more than platonic fashion she could spot it from space, she had no idea how she did it but she managed every time. She ran her hand over the back of her neck and struggled to find the words to explain, she didn't quite understand it herself let alone know how to convey things to Kara.

“I don't know, I mean she is interesting, she is intelligent, she is so honest when she talks, even when it will get her in trouble, she is charming and very attractive, I have never met anyone like her yes I was worried about her too, I want to get to know her better, is that ok? I mean nothing will ever happen she isn't interested in people, especially not romantically, she said that she is ethically promiscuous”

Kara wasn't sure what to say to that, she knew Alex liked her, and well this was confirmation but she couldn't understand anyone not liking Alex, what did she mean by ethically promiscuous? This was not a term that she had ever heard. Why was Alex worried about what she would think, it reminded her of when Alex first liked Maggie and was coming out, she wondered how deep the feeling went, Lena had suggested that Lex liked Alex too. 

“I am worried about her, but I think if there is anyone that can keep her out of trouble it's you, just be careful, like you told me when I fell for Lena, now how about we get me ready so I am not late for my date.”

Alex raised her brow, she was not sure that she was falling for Lex, but she was happy they were not fighting; they had been doing that alot lately and she was definitely happier with this outcome. She smiled and made a start on Kara’s hair. Alex was great, she did her hair, and make up most people wouldn’t think that the older Danvers would be so good at it but she always makes Kara look good. When she was finished Kara put on the suit she took out her coms, tonight would be for her and Lena only. She took a cab to the penthouse and arrived just on time knocking on the door and waiting for Lena. Her heart was beating out of her chest. She knew Lena would look amazing and she couldn’t wait to see her.

Lena’s penthouse (National City) 18-03-2020 Earth Prime 19:00………

Lena walked to the door, grabbing her clutch off the counter as she did. Kara didn’t need to knock, but the brunette smiled because of it anyway. She had thought that maybe she would have called up, but then Kara was very cordial, she was almost sweet in her manners not to mention her adaptations of human customs. When she pulled the door open, her words caught in her throat.

“Kara, silly, you don—“

The journalist looked.... well, for lack of finding the right words in her extended vocabulary... so damn hot. Somehow the suit looked better than it had in the shop, her hair was exquisite and the emerald weaves matched her dress, they looked like they fit together perfectly, a little of Lena’s outfit in Kara’s and vice versa. They complimented each other, and she couldn't help but think that there was a symmetry to them, dark and light, color and monochrome they were perfectly matched.

“Darling... you look, exquisite,” 

She said when she came back to her senses. Lena stepped past the door and pecked her girlfriend on the lips. If she invited Kara in, they may never leave. She looked unbelievable, and the suit was having more of an effect than it had previously, how she was managing to keep moving forward she didn't know.

Kara had wanted to knock, she wanted things to be like a proper date where she picked up the girl and took her to the ball, all the nervous energy and excitement of the first date. As the door opened Lena started to speak, noting that Kara was paying attention her eyes drifted over Lena. The emerald dress looked even better than she remembered Lena's skin rich creamy alabaster shining out from under the silk her perfect form caressed by the dress and her hair up with Kara’s flowers. She swallowed hard and tried to speak but it was Lena who managed the compliment first.

“Thank you, you look ethereal Lena, I can’t believe just how amazing that you look”

She kissed her back and then held out her elbow for Lena to escort her to the car. She held the doors and helped Lena slide into the town car before getting in next to her.

“I can’t wait to escort you in Lena, you will be the most stunning woman at the gala and I will be the luckiest, I want to kiss you so badly but I don’t want to smudge perfection”

As they walked down to the car, Lena’s insides were plagued with butterflies. It felt so right being hand in hand with Kara and her smile was beaming. She had wanted this for so long but never thought it would be in grasp she was glad that for once she was wrong, normally preferring to be right, she found this occasion had changed her mind considerably, she would be wrong every day if this was the outcome.

“I beg to differ. I am undoubtedly the lucky one. Really, Kara, I was so foolish to be angry for so long, instead of seeing what was right in front of me. You’re more than what I deserve, but I intend to remind you how much you mean to me each and every day.”

Yes, tonight was special. It was officially their first date. Even if they were home in sweats eating pizza and talking about environmental issues, Lena would be happy still. However the chance to show off Kara, to make their relationship official, the fact that Kara was willing to show the world how they felt about each other. She just hoped that the papers wouldn't give them too much trouble.

Kara listened to her and then placed her finger lightly on her lips looking deep into her eyes. They had spent so much time avoiding their feelings so much time not realising what they had, and then wasted more time with anger and hostility, she didn't want to waste anymore on apologizing. She moved her finger and kissed her lips softly, taking care not to smudge perfection.

“Tonight we start our official date, and let’s make it an official new star, no more regrets, no more sorrows no more blame, just you and me, in love. We have both apologize enough, we love each other deeply and have the same kind of reverence for each other, how about we just do our best to go forward together”

She slid her hand down her neck and over the pale skin on her shoulder giving it a soft squeeze. She wanted nothing more than to have a new life, a new relationship with her love, there was nothing that she wanted more than to declare her love for Lena, and let the whole world know what a wonderful woman that she is.

“I love you Lena Luthor and wouldn’t trade our life for anything”

Lena nodded. Her smile was soft, happy. Kara was right, there was no point in bringing up what was already behind them, especially when the present was here for the taking. She agreed, reveling in her girlfriend’s warm touch. Her skin tingling and warming at Kara's touch.

“You’re right, my love, I love you too, Kara Zor-El Danvers.”

As the car came to slow stop, Lena looked out the window. Aside from mild traffic in the VIP unloading area, everything else seemed to be getting underway successfully. She was worried that Kara may have second thoughts about being so public, she may be a member of the press but she had rarely been on the receiving end of them. Not as Kara, Kara had always been safe, she hoped that her experiences as supergirl had prepared her.

“Ready for this?” 

She asked as she took Kara’s hand in hers again, even if it was just for a few minutes. 

Kara could hear the people all pushing and shoving the clicking of the cameras and the questions for who ever was currently in the spotlight. She swallowed hard. She was not ready for the spotlight, not one bit, but no one would be interested in her.

“Just don’t let me go ok”

When it was finally time to exit the car, her driver opened the door and she stepped out, elegant and poised, knowing she was about to take the arm of an amazing woman. She watched as Lena gracefully departed the car and followed behind her, stepping out of the car she held out her arm for Lena and placed her hand over her hand.

“Time to go be brilliant as always”

She leaned in and placed a small kiss to her cheek as the cameras exploded.

“In for a penny right”

“I have no intention of letting go of you,” she responded with a loving smile.

With her arm linked to Kara’s, she began walking toward their entrance. For the most part, she ignored the cameras and voices vying for her attention. Though, she could hear certain things among them that only widened her smile.


	30. A first date

Children's Gala (National City) 18-03-2020 Earth Prime 19:30………

‘𝑰𝒔𝒏'𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑲𝒂𝒓𝒂 𝑫𝒂𝒏𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝑪𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒐?' And phrases like it could be made out above the others. Lena took pride in that, knowing her girlfriend looked stunning and that others took notice. It wasn't just that, there was the acknowledgement of Kara as an individual; the Pulitzer clearly has upgraded her status amongst the other reporters. She liked that, it was good for Kara to hear that she was just as important as Lena and supergirl. Eventually, they made it through the large double doors and the media crowd noises faded away.

“We made it through part one, How’re you holding up?”

Kara did her best to block out the noise, the comments surprisingly there were a number about her and a few she wished she had not heard about Lena. They stepped through and the noise stopped. She looked at Lena and smiled.

“I am with you. I am always ok, now shall we have plenty of people yet to see your splendor, did I mention how beautiful you look?? So do we loop or head straight for the bar?”

She led Lena to the door opening it and placing her arm around her waist to walk through. The internal doors led them into an amazing room with high seedlings and sleek aesthetics, there was a bar at one corner and there were people walking around with canapes, there were signs to a silent auction and the donation area. There was a large dancing area and people talking in small groups. Everyone was dressed up and Kara recognized a number of people although most of them just from Forbes and such like. Not that any of them captured Kara’s attention for long, she only had eyes for Lena.

“You have, and have I told you how absolutely delicious you look?”

Lena replied with a side grin. The brunette emphasized her point by taking a small step away and letting her eyes roam up and down her girlfriend’s form with mischievousness. She loved the way that she looked in the suit, powerful and feminine, not to mention the most stunning woman in the room, so many eyes roaming to her, she would enjoy making them all jealous throughout the evening, not to mention getting to show off how amazing she was.

“You May have mentioned it once or twice”

Kara said with a small blush, she was more than happy to have Lena think that she was appealing, as much as she saw herself as average she didn't have a issue with Lena thinking something to the contrary, after all her feelings towards Lena were much deeper than friends, and for the first time she was ready to explore needs that she had of a more intimate nature, with Lena finding her appealing that would make it easier.

“I think drinks are in order. We’ll surely need them to deal with some of our fellow guests, there’s a martini with my name on it somewhere.” 

She laughed lightly and stood beside the blonde. She was more than happy to delay the mingling and social interactions in favor of more time with Kara. They walked through the small crowd of people. Their destination was reached in less time than Luthor had suspected.

“What’ll you have my darling?”

She took a deep breath and swallowed hard at the look in Lena's eyes, she wondered if they would make it through the night. They had found it increasingly difficult to avoid more intimate touches, and with the dress that Lena was wearing and the intimate nature of dancing with her she could already see that she would be needing a cold shower or a trip to the fortress to cool off. She smiled and pulled her close as she made her way through the crowd and to the bar.

“Well nothing her has any affect so lemonade please, oh and just to let you know, I would like the first and last dance, and all the ones in the middle but I won’t be greedy”

Lena orders their drinks, forgetting human alcohol did nothing to her girlfriend. The CEO scans the crowd briefly while they wait. She wasn't really interested in anyone there, after all she had all she needed already but there were a few that she supposed that she should speak to, the main thing was that she was seen attending, that she made a nice donation, and above all else she enjoyed the time with Kara. No real heavy-hitters quite yet, which was a good thing. It meant the chances of getting interrupted soon were slim to none.

“You may have first, last, and any in between when I’m not forced into a business obligatory glance, aside from your side job of karaoke enthusiast, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen you dance, Ms. Danvers.”

Kara smiled at Lena, she has many things Lena didn’t know about just yet and one of them was dancing. She didn't often talk about her experience of being on earth to start or of krypton, but she was happy to share her life, her memories herself with Lena.

“You know how I told you about painting, well that was for focus and to help me block things out, dancing, waltz, foxtrot, quickstep and tango were to help with my human interactions and moving as expected. Everything was so overwhelming when I first arrived, too bright, too loud, I moved too fast, I was too strong. Everything overwhelmed me and the ideas they had helped me to learn to block things out.”

Kara smirked and raised her brow, she was thinking about the dances and which ones would give her the best chance to show Lena her skill, and her love, all at the same time. She leaned over and kissed her cheek, whispering in her ear.

“I think a tango would be nice with you sensual, I can hold you tight some nice spins and it’s not too hard on heels. I’m gonna Show you just how good I can lead, scenes how I am in the suit”

Lena leaned into the whisper, a smile still spread across her face. She was more than happy to encourage the more dominant side of Kara, although the things she said gave her moments of pause. She couldn't help but think about the way that Kara had the same kind of sensory issues that Lexi had, she wondered if she would have been helped with parents like Eliza and Jeramiah.

“Well then I’ll definitely need to rely on you to lead. I can’t even remember the last time I did a tango. I may even have to rely on the internet to remind me. Maybe a video or two,” 

She says with a light laugh. She wanted to ask Kara about it however she didn't want to bring it up right now, she wanted to enjoy the night for what it was, to be able to spend a night with her girlfriend and then when they were alone she would ask her. She wouldn't push but she did want to know more and ask more. Their drinks are placed on the small bar before them. After a sip, she makes no attempt to move, preferring to stay as close to her girlfriend as possible. There’s some flirtation in her tone and her eyes as she looks at her girlfriend.

“I must say, learning these new things about you is quite exciting. I can’t wait to learn more. Maybe when we have some privacy I can ask more.”

Kara let out a small laugh and moved to stand with Lena softly placing her hand on the small of her back. Her hand warming on the skin so soft, she moved her fingers slowly. She was happy to answer any questions that Lena asked, she would also ask her own, she wanted to know everything about her, and share everything with her.

“We can talk as much as you want, I have no secrets from you any more. I can lead and I promise not to step on your toes, you know I am happy to share all that I am with you”

She took Lena’s hand and looked into her eyes lovingly. She couldn’t believe that she was here with Lena and she was her date, her girlfriend, she just felt overwhelmed with happiness. She knew that as much as this was their first date there was also a gala for something, and Lena needed to do her part, it would help with her image and more than that it would show people the real Lena, the caring and loving side of her that Kara got to see.

“What is the benefit for? And who are we looking to avoid if we can?”

A nearly invisible blush colored Lena’s cheek when she felt Kara’s hand on her back. What were once seemingly friendly touches now heated the CEO from the inside out. A small chuckle escaped her lips as she held Kara’s beautiful gaze. 

“Well, for starters, the benefit is for the city’s youth. Any programs, orphanages, recreational activities, you name it. It’s one thing the city council hasn’t been able to improve, so I will.”

She took a sip of her drink as her eyes moved to scan the room. She tried to focus on the people in the crowd although every molecule in her body seemed to resonate with the feeling being produced by Kara’s hand.

“And we definitely want to avoid a couple of the politicians like Taylor and Cruz. You know the type.”

Kara saw the faint blush on Lena’s face; it was a delightful sight, just a little colour making her even more beautiful. Everything about Lena was beautiful. She took her breath away. The contact with the soft skin of Lena’s back was amazing. She loved being able to be this close. She smiled and leaned in again, kissing the slightly flushed face. She didn't often get to see the blush on Lena’s face, she was much better at handling most situations than Kara, and isn't easily flustered, that small rose colour on her face was a rare occasion and so precious to Kara.

“Children, great, good plan, and avoid vapid political people check, Shall we dance?”

“I’d love to” 

The CEO replied with a bright smile. She set her drink on the counter and then took her girlfriend’s hand as she was led out to the dance floor. Lena’s eyes could not leave Kara. Even if she weren’t Supergirl, she was so strong, so graceful. It had been a number of years since she danced, although she had a lot as a child and as a young woman, it was expected but there were few people that she enjoyed dancing with. Mainly male suitors deemed appropriate by her father, which generally meant they were not particularly nice individuals. A shiver run through her body as she turns to face the blonde. The CEO closed the distance between their bodies, keeping her right hand in Kara’s left and placing the other on her shoulder. Before they began to move, she leaned in for another chaste kiss.

Kara smiled brightly leading the raven goddess into the dance floor she moved her around and placed her hand on the small of her back. When the chaste kiss happened she pulled her closer flus to her body and started to move her around the floor. She didn’t need to focus on the steps or the music. There was a natural balance in dancing with Lena, the moment was perfect and she continued to lead. She spun Lena slowly before pulling her back and dipping her, placing a kiss to her favored freckle on her neck, feeling Lena's pulse under her lips and bringing her back up. The music continued as did the dance.

“Lena you dance beautifully I don’t know why you were worried”

Lena tries to follow as best she can, keeping up only thanks to Kara’s excellent leading. The woman touched her in just the right way, with the gentlest nudge in the right direction when Lena feared a misstep. This proved to the brunette once again just how deep their connection ran. The dance itself drew something out of Lena that she hadn’t known she lacked in her life, and now she wasn’t sure she could ever be without it again. The dip and neck kiss set her insides fluttering. Another dance had begun between them and Lena hoped she’d be able to make it through their evening without becoming undone. When the CEO stood back up, she slid her hand from Kara’s shoulder to the back of her neck, her fingertips brushing softly against the blonde’s skin.

“Well, you’re an excellent lead.”

The touch of Lena's fingers on the back of her neck caused her body to energize, it came to life like Lena herself was the sun. She smiled softly and pushed her fingers under the soft fabric of Lena's dress needing more connection. Everything was all too much and not enough as she music switched she pulled her in closer. She wanted to keep dancing with Lena for eternity, it was so perfect a moment every moment she had experienced through their relationship so far has felt so good, like she belonged in a way she had never felt.

“The dance is just a product of love, it’s a synchronicity, you complete me”

A silent gasp fell from Lena’s lips as Kara’s hand slipped beneath the fabric of her dress. Surely the blonde had heard it but she was thankful there was no one else close by enough to witness it. Feeling bold, the CEO moved forward just enough for her lips to be near to Kara’s ear. 

“I wonder then, how well synchronized we might be in other aspects of showing love...”

Rather than pull away, Lena opted to stay this close and rest her cheek against Kara’s as they moved. Once dance became many as they continued to move together across the dance floor, other people joining and leaving with the changing of song, Lena kept her close throughout.

The gasp told Kara that Lena was feeling it too, connected to the energy that was moving between them, holding them together. A soft shiver brushed over Kara’s body, the suggestive nature of Lena's words and the way she pulled up close to her resting against her cheek caused a quiet moan.

“It will be perfect, because it’s you, we belong together Lena”

She swayed softly, her hand moving up her back brushing the soft skin, her fingertips brushing lightly. It was almost as if the energy exchange was bringing them closer together the longer they remained in contact the more that Kara could feel Lena permeating around her, the energy mixing feeling like it was penetrating her impervious skin and joining with her own.

“Can you feel me? Connected to you? I can feel you in every fiber of my being”

They had been caught in the dance for what seemed like moments but at the same time Kara was aware that she had monopolized Lena for nearly an hour dancing as one. As the music showed she guided Lena back to the bar.

“I think we have given enough of a show for now”

Lena’s body hung on every word that crossed Kara’s lips, as if she were speaking for both of them, expressing what the brunette felt as well. Lena felt like she was intoxicated, her mind knew that she had not drunk enough to be feeling the effects. She thought that maybe she was experiencing the love between them in a different way, a chemical change due to proximity, whatever it was that caused this, she didn't want to think too much just experience the feeling.

“I always feel our connection, even when we’re apart. Like we’re the only ones that exist and define string theory.”

She grinned at herself, thinking how they were two powerful women in very different ways yet were deep down just a pair of science nerds. Lena walked away from the dance floor with Kara, still high from their closeness, when she was stopped by a local businessman. She groaned internally but smiled outwardly and greeted the man. Without hesitation, she then introduced her girlfriend to him with a proud smile.

Kara’s heart seemed to swell as the words filtered through her mind, Lena felt it to the bond between them she was so happy. She moved with her and stopped to speak to some man, she stopped and waited as Lena talked to him. When she introduced her Kara smiled brightly. Lena had stated that Kara was her girlfriend, there was no hesitation no question, it was the most amazing feeling, belonging, love, acceptance all rolled into one word.

“Nice to meet you, it’s nice to know that local business people are interested in making provision for the next generation”

She drew small patterns on the small of her back, kryptonian messages of love.  
She held out her hand and shook his never moving her other from Lena. she was communicating with Lena without speaking, she knew that she would not understand but maybe one day if she could teach Lena the kryptonian language and writing they could communicate through touch, as she was doing now.

“My girlfriend told me that tonight is to bridge the gap in funding and move forward with key projects otherwise not completed by the city. Such a good cause”

Lena had no idea what the patterns on her back were and after splitting her attention between them and their conversation, she made a mental note to ask Kara later. The next hour or so continued in much of the same way. They mingled with other attendees and had been able to successfully avoid the worst attendees. At one point, Lena was thankful for the dim lighting to cover her flushed skin when Kara had touched her in a certain way. It was completely innocent on its own, but the CEO’s body had been growing tight with tension since the moment she opened her door when Kara arrived to pick her up earlier.  
The was thankful for the brief lull of conversation and pulled Kara into a far corner. Lipstick be damned, she captured Kara’s lips in a fiery kiss.

“...hi.”

Kara had moved around with Lena talking where needed and smiling, always with her fingers touching Lena. Every bit of sinfully delicious skin on display was calling her like some kind of magnetic force demanded her attention. She could feel how her body heated more as the night went on and she wanted nothing more than to be with Lena. Then she was in the corner Lena's lips and tongue dancing with her own, her hand at the base of her neck lightly scraping her scalp.

“Hey, So how much longer until I can get you out of here and stop sharing you?”

Kara hadn't meant to sound needy but she was how she felt a first date meant time with the woman she loved, and she had it tantalizing and beautiful touches but she wanted more, she wanted lena to herself. Although Kara was not sure that she would be able to control herself indefinitely she didn't want to rush their relationship, she would do her best to wait until Lena was ready, although the way she was speaking the husky sound to her voice suggested that Lena was feeling the connection as strong as she was.

“Have you reached the point you can leave without drawing attention?”

Lena’s hands cupped Kara’s cheeks as they kissed. Still, she did not feel close enough to the Kryptonian. She almost whimpered when Kara pulled away, but perhaps it had been for the best. Her girlfriend seemed to be thinking along Lena’s same thought process. She was more than happy to move forward, her desire for Kara had built exponentially since she realized that they were in the same place, although she would only go as far as Kara was ready for, their previous conversation had highlighted that Kara was not experienced.

“I think we’re almost home free. The only other thing we should do is swing by the silent auction and place some bids. Then we can sneak out through the kitchen?”

Was it wrong that Lena’s mind had already mapped the fastest way out? She absolutely did not care if it was. The way she saw it, her only job for the rest of the night was to find out what other scrumptious noises she could get Kara to make in the silence of her apartment. She was patient, not a saint.

Kara moved her head into the palm caressing her face and then placed her forehead on Lena's , looking into her eyes as a wide grin graced her face. She wanted to have a chance to spend some time with Lena, as first dates went this was exciting and enticing although far to the public, she wanted to get to know Lena better. For years they had been friends in both verses, but since the reveal things had been different and then with the replacement of this Lena there had been progression, they were not exactly the same but she felt she knew her, the experiences were comparable but there were subtle differences and Kara wanted to know them all.

“Mmm silent auction and then I get you all to myself for a while”

She kissed her softly then took her hand threading their fingers together leading the way to the auction. She wasn't sure if they had stayed hidden in the corner that they would make it to the auction, both of them appeared to be thinking along the same lines, wanting to just be together. She was relieved that Lena felt as strongly as she did.

“It feels like I have waited for this first date for ever and I am having a great time, but I am done sharing you”

Lena was smiling from ear to ear, not only because she was holding hands with the most beautiful woman in the entire city, but because she couldn’t wake to sneak out with said woman. The way that Kara said that she was done sharing made her body shiver. There was something almost possessive about it, however it wasn't threatening; it was more of a need, a desire to have time together than to possess her as an individual.

“I’ve never been a fan of sharing either, darling. Don’t think I didn’t notice how some of these people looked at you,” she replied with a smirk as they reached the auction.

The CEO spotted the two things she’d wanted to bid on since they’d been secured for the auction. One was an art piece from a promising young local artist, and the other was an antique camera that had been kept in perfect working order. She smiled at Kara thinking that if they moved around the auction in different directions they would be able to meet where they needed, she grinned with a raised brow before speaking.

“Divide and conquer, my love? Or would you like me to make a bid in your name?”

“your lucky you only have good eyesight, hearing about your perfect ass from someone other than me was a bit annoying”

She grinned and they moved in and looked at the items, Kara knew she didn’t have enough to win any of the bids but she could make one and leave a donation. She watched Lena take in the information, she wouldn't have been able to hear the information but at the same time she was aware of the effect she had on others wasn't she?

“As loathe as I am to have you out of my grasp the quicker we bid the quicker we can leave”

She pressed into Lena and grabbed said perfect ass kissing her cheek. Then giving her ass a small tap.

“What? Really?” 

She asked, deadly serious. That’s the last thing she thought was on any of these people’s minds. She doesn’t have long to ponder it further because the body part in question is gripped firmly by a Kryptonian hand. Lena purred in approval as her gaze darted to Kara’s. She would be needing more of that later tonight sans clothing. 

“As you wish, Ms. Danvers.”

The CEO walked toward the tables with the items and left a significant bid for an art piece, but left a bid high enough for the camera that Lena didn’t think she’d be outbid. Kara was a journalist but the brunette thought she might enjoy using it when opportunities presented themselves.

“Go get your things I’ll be back”

Kara was always going it endearing that Lena was modest although she wondered how much of it was low self worth. She walked around placing bids on things for nothing more than she could afford and then put two hundred dollars in the donation. It wasn't much but it was what she had. She moved to behind Lena and wrapped her arms around her kissing her neck and resting her head on her shoulder.

“Are you finished beautiful? Can we go now?”

Lena smiled widely, immediately knowing it was Kara’s touch. She had not seen the woman approach, he had not heard her, but there was a familiar feeling to the touch, and as there was connection with her skin she felt the presence within her. She sighed softly as she leaned into the touch.

“I am. Let’s get out of here,” 

She said as she took the woman’s hand and led her toward the industrial kitchen. She pulled out her phone and sent a quick text then gave Kara all of her attention.


	31. Physical love

Lena’s town car (National City) 18-03-2020 Earth Prime 22:30………

“Did you enjoy yourself tonight?” 

Lena asked genuinely. She’d been so happy to spend her evening with her girlfriend and didn’t want it to appear as though she only wanted one thing out of the evening. She knew that Kara had some difficulties with the setting, the noise and the people, she was not as aware of this before the earlier conversation but she was glad that they got to spend the time together, she was hoping that even with all the stimulus she had a good time as she herself had and had loved every minute.

Kara smiled brightly. She turned in the seat and looked at her, the question was synonymous with her insecurity. She knew that Lena had spent most of her life feeling that she was not good enough, that people didn't want to be with her, the idea that anyone would not want to spend time with her was foreign to her, after all she wanted nothing more than to do so.

“Lena I ate, danced, spent time with you, got to see you in this stunning dress, got to show the men who thought they could make a move on you that you were happy with me, I got everything I ever wanted the moment you introduced me to the first man, you called me yours and that’s everything to me, I had a great time”

She leaned in to kiss her softly and she took her hand as she asked her question.

“Did you have a good time my love?”

Lena listened intently, smiling widely as she spoke. She would announce to the world that she loved the blonde if she could. As long as Kara knew how much Lena felt for her, her heart would beat with joy. She had kissed her back without any thought, she felt so at ease with Kara that she was more than happy to display affection, to allow her heart to hope to be vulnerable in the arms of the woman she loved..

“I had an excellent time, I especially loved dancing with you. I’m looking forward to learning all the little things I haven’t in the past few years.”

She replied as she sat comfortably beside her girlfriend. Lena leaned in closer with each word until she pressed a kiss to Kara’s soft lips. Intertwining her fingers with Kara’s loving the way that their hands looked and felt combined together.

Each kiss sparked a flutter through her body, a new wave of heat, passion, desire. The proximity to Lena was good but not enough she pulled her into her lap. Feeling the kiss as her hands moved up her thigh and scratched small circles into her scalp. She pulled her as close as possible feeling her chest rise and fall into her own with each breath.

“Lena”

She moaned out as she struggled for breath, it was a strange sensation for her, she barely needed to breathe but moments with Kara like this always left her breathless. She thought it a curious sensation but at the same time she loved it.

Lena’s palms immediately land on Kara’s jaw and neck. The blonde’s touch on her thigh causes the CEO to moan into the kiss as her body reacts. Her kisses are no longer chaste and sweet, but hungry and needy. Her tongue finds Kara’s and their mouths move in perfect sync. When Kara pulls away slightly, it’s only then she realizes that the car is in motion and probably has been for a short while. Lena’s eyes open to find dark blue ones looking back at her. The brunette moves her kisses to Kara’s neck as her fingers deftly begin unfasten the buttons of Her girlfriend’s crisp shirt.

“I want you, Kara...”

Kara felt every moment every kiss like it was electricity coursing through her, tingling, burning so tantalizing she scratched her nails lightly over the creamy thighs of the raven woman. She gasped out as Lena’s lips hit a sensitive spot on her neck and her hands slipped further up her thighs and gripped her ass, squeezing it lightly as she moved to suck on the Luthors scrumptious pulse point.

“I want you too, Lena, every bit of me, I want to know all of you”

Lena gasped and it caught in her throat, Kara’s hands and mouth were touching and caressing her so softly, so attentive, the breath seemed to catch when Kara caused her body to ignite, her temperature seemed to spike as she felt her heart race. Her hips rolled into the blonde when strong hands gripped her backside.

“Dear gods... you can have all of me, take all of me” 

She husked through heavy breaths. With enough of Kara’s shirt now exposing some over her torso, Lena’s hand explored the warm skin awaiting her. There was nothing that could prepare her for the warm muscular skin, it wasn't the first time that she explored it but it was as amazing as the first. She would never touch her without being in awe. She recaptured the blonde’s lips in a hot passionate kiss.

Lena’s heart was beating almost as fast as her own the adrenaline and desire coursing through her as it was Kara. She heard her words and the raspy sound of her voice Kara let out a small growl. Smothered by the kiss the growl caught in her throat as she joined the kiss, Lena's hands on her skin making her tingle, heat pooling in her abdomen, and lower, she could feel it. She wanted to touch Lena so badly, the car was slowing.

“We are at yours Lena, we are here, do you want me to come up? I don't want to presume anything, I mean we are officially only on our first date and I am behaving like we are already there for more intimate relations.”

Lena sat back against Kara’s thighs and looked at her curiously. She thought that they were both of the same mind but now she was a little concerned that that was not the case. Her insecurities and anxieties started to surface as Kara spoke. Was Kara not ready or was she pushing her to fast? She wanted to be with her in every way but she was not sure if Kara would be ready, she had said herself that she had never done this with anyone, or rather she had never fully participated. Maybe she was nervous, maybe she wasn't ready.

“Yes, why wouldn’t I? I thought...”

She leaves the rest of her words hanging in the air between them as she smiles at her girlfriend. She was clear enough on her position, she had been willing to give herself to Kara, she wanted to, hell she felt like she needed to like her life depended on it. She had never felt this close, this connected to anyone in her life. However she needed to put Kara first, she knew that this was new to her, that there were control issues, that there would be stimulation that she may not be able to manage. Was Kara nervous or was there something wrong.

“Is something wrong?” 

Lena asked quietly. She didn't want there to be any worry for Kara, saying that she was concerned that she wasn't ready, she wanted Kara to feel in control. Thankfully, her driver must have some idea what they were up to because he has exited the car but not come around to open the door or betray their privacy.

“Nothing is wrong, by Rao lena nothing is wrong at all, I just didn’t want to assume, I can’t promise to behave. I am finding it difficult to control my impulses around you.”

She squeezed her ass lightly and leaned in and kissed her neck sucking softly as not to mark the delicate flesh. Her mind was wandering over thoughts of Lena, her body, the feeling of her the way she moved with her, the softness of her skin and the silky nature of her hair. She wondered if all would be as intoxicating as the parts of Lena that she had already been allowed to explore. She sat back and looked at her pupils already blown and smirks on her face.

Lena bit her bottom lip as Kara returned to her neck. She gripped the lapels of the blonde’s jacket to keep herself steady. There was nothing more exciting than anticipation, and she had been anticipating this for a very long time, she had herself so tightly wound that she felt every touch like a small release, never fulfilling enough but a small glimpse of the promise to come. When they’re looking at each other once again, the brunette raises a brow in question.

“Oh darling, I had no intention of behaving. It may have been the first official date, but when you count all the lunches, the dinners, the previous galas. If you count them all and factor in how long I have wanted to be with you, this is more like the hundredth date, and as long as you're willing I think that I have waited long enough. I’m going to worship every inch of you in any way you’ll allow me.”

Kara looked at Lena, the brow Rao, that brow, she loved how it accentuated Lena’s moods and it had more power over her than she cared to admit.

“Mmm well I am more than happy to hear that”

They parted as Kara could hear the driver finally walking to the door, she straightened herself and Lena as the door opened. Kara followed her out of the car and linked their hands together walking her to the door and opening it. She moved through to the elevator and slipped inside pulling Lena as if dancing so she spun into her. Kara’s hand around her waist and she kissed the side of her neck as she pressed into her.

The sensation of being spun while the elevator was moving up was odd, but she fully trusted the hold Kara had on her. It left her with a somewhat giddy feeling but not unpleasant, she had been feeling a little giddy all night after all everything was happening so fast yet so slow at the same time, there was years of build up and such a slow fruition that everything seemed to be combining at once and Lena was enthralled. Lena squeezed the hand within her own when Kara kissed her again. 

“I’m never going to tire of having you so close”

She said just as the elevator opened to the top floor. She leaned forward just enough to take the blonde’s earlobe between her teeth and tugged gently. Without untangling herself too much from the Kryptonian’s embrace, she fumbled with the door until it swung open. Lena didn’t care that it shut louder than she intended behind them, she needed to capture Kara’s lips in another heated kiss.

Kara found herself in Lena’s penthouse, the woman wrapped around her and kissing her securely, she loved the way they fit together, she moved her towards the wall and kissed her back. Her hand lifting lena's leg over her hip and running her hand down her thigh. Intertwined fingers and hand pushed up the wall as she pressed into her.

Lena’s leg willingly clung onto Kara’s hip. Her right arm instinctively wrapped around the blonde’s back to balance herself. Her kisses grew more intense and the fingers of her other hand tangled into a fist full of blonde hair. Still, somewhere at the back of her mind, she reminds herself to slow down. Just a little. Lena didn’t mind being taken anywhere in her apartment, but it wasn’t just about her. It was more about Kara. She pulled back from the kisses and tried to catch her breath.

“Darling we have lots of time, and too many clothes to continue... you deserve this to be special, how about moving to my room?”

Kara whimpered when Lena broke the kiss she looked into her eyes as she spoke. No sooner that the words were out she lifted her and moved them to Lena's bedroom. She smiled a little sheepishly at the display of super speed and held her in her arms to ensure she didn’t fall. Her hands softly caressing the skin she could touch and moving to the zip on the dress.

“Let me help with the zip”

Kara chuckled lightly and smiled at the woman. She had been a little eager, but that wasn't her fault, all the dancing and the soft touches were tantalizing, the kisses the soft touched and whispers, Lena had been suggestive and teasing through out the evening which was nothing normal really, but when coupled with all the closeness and touching it had driven her wild.

“Sorry you said this is where you wanted to be I couldn’t disagree with that assessment”

Sliding the zip down as she spoke.

“Rao”

When the zipper of her dress was all the way down, she stepped out of the garment and kicked her shoes off, all while holding her girlfriend’s gaze. While her hands were otherwise unoccupied, she also removed the pins in her hair and let it fall loose around her shoulders. She stepped back into Kara’s space and kissed her gently. Her deft hands moved to continue to remove the blonde’s clothing, deepening their kisses as she progressed. while she was at it, she removed the items.

Kara's breath caught in her throat, she swallowed hard and watched as Lena's hair fell around her shoulders. The dark hair caressing her shoulders, falling softly around her, framing her face, contrasting with the pale skin. She kissed her deeply, their tongues caressing as their lips melded. Her breathing sped up only increasing by the fire stoked kiss, filing her desire for Lena. She trailed her fingers over the newly bared flesh so flawless as she stood being undressed figuratively and literally by Lena.

“I have never wanted anyone like this Lena, can I?”

Her hands were holding the underwear tentatively irreverently the look of awe and desire battling for supremacy on her features, she was not sure what would win out. She wanted Lena to see the awe as well as the desire but at the same time she wanted her to feel loved not like a possession.

“Neither have I” 

She whispered back as she slipped the white shirt off Kara’s body. Lena bit her bottom lip and blinked, nearly on the verge of something akin to tears. Her girlfriend was beautiful. Not in the way that photos or makeup might make someone pretty or elegant or gorgeous. No, this was something different for Lena. Every curvature that progressed and formed Kara’s body was captivating. Each graceful dip and slope spoke to Lena in a way she wasn’t sure she understood yet. If it was possible, her heart swelled with more love and adoration.

“Yes... as long as I can do the same...”

Kara bit her lip and nodded as Lena spoke, she wasn’t sure that her mind was ready to see the whole of Lena, every fiber of her being called out in caution that it would be too much, at the same time in desire to keep going. She captured the soft fabric and slowly drew it down lenas legs, her fingers caressing every inch as she moved. She took a breath to steady herself before she looked up, her smile wider than she thought possible as the Luthor was laid bare in front of her. She wasn't sure how to respond to the way she was feeling, she wanted to explain, she thought that she needed to communicate, this was their first time together and she knew that Lena also had insecurities.

“you have stolen my breath and my heart”

“Sorry, not sorry.” 

She said with a devious smirk. Lena captured her lips in another kiss before moving away to slide the blonde’s pants and undies slowly down her frame. On her way back up, she looked up to meet Kara’s eyes and placed a soft wet kiss at the absolute lowest parts of her abs. Then she stood and admired the newly revealed parts of her girlfriend's body. The only thing left her those Kara Danvers glasses and her bra. It was a beautiful sight, those abs were fast becoming one of Lena’s favorite things.

Kara let out a small moan as Lena kissed her. The soft lips irradiating her skin and sending waves of warmth over her body. The way she felt was unexpected, the warmth the way the lips seemed to create sensation not only at the sight they touched but radiating over all adjoining areas.

“Lena”

It was barely more than a whisper as she picked Lena up and moved her to the bed. She put her glasses to the side and pulled off her bra. She moved onto the bed to crawl towards Lena. Kissing her deeply as she lay over her, their skin touching sending pleasure washing over Kara. She had not thought about how they would proceed but feeling Lena under her like this was exciting.

Lena moaned lightly into their kisses. Her hands roamed all along the warm body above her. She enjoyed this moment while it lasted, their stolen breaths and quiet sounds. The brunette couldn’t believe they were finally here. But there was one thing she needed to change, at least for the short term. Her focus was Kara’s first experience and making it something special, for that she wanted to take the lead. She pulled away from the kiss only enough to speak.

“On your back, Danvers.”

Kara's eyes widened at Lena's words. She was not expecting it, she was just getting used to the feeling of Lena’s body under hers. However there was something very exciting about the way she spoke, demanding but exciting.

“Oh ok I.....”

She bit her lip, looking into the emerald orbs and could see the determination on Lena’s face the way that she was looking at her, made her stomach flip. She moved her hands to hold Lena and rolled them Lena's body above hers the moonlight dancing over and illuminating her smooth skin

“Yes Lena”

Lena noted the smile and response, making a mental note for the future. She knew they had a long way to go but she wanted to learn what Kara liked when they were together like this. She wondered if Kara enjoyed having someone take the lead or if it was just because it was the first time, although she did seem confident in her own way. The brunette smiled down at her, still not used to being carried and moved like she weighed nothing. She gently caressed Kara’s bottom lip with the pad of her thumb, completely in awe at how soft Kara’s lips truly were. She was surprised every time at just how soft Kara was, she had seen supergirl crushed burned hit with no effects yet she was soft like silk.

“Tell me if there’s anything I do that you don’t want, okay?” 

Her words were quiet, reassuring. She had no intention of doing anything odd or off the wall, but she wanted Kara to know it mattered anyway. Kara had a lot of things to overcome, the sensory stimulation, the powers, the unexpected feelings that can happen in these situations, she wanted her to be happy, comfortable and most of all experience the pleasure.

Kara watched Lena, the way her thumb rubbed across her bottom lip, she chased after the retreating digit as Lena spoke. She was so focused on the way Lena spoke, and what she was saying she momentarily forgot her own desire, that she was currently just obeying Lena’s instruction. Kara reached out and brushed the hair from her face as her hand scratched lightly down her back.

“I want to be able to touch you too, I want to experience everything with you”

Lena’s smile widened, and perhaps took on a slight bit of wickedness. She wanted that too, Kara would have no idea how the touch starved woman wanted to feel Kara’s hands on her, to feel her touch her more intimately, to be able finally experience what thus far had been limited to her nights alone behind locked doors.

“Kara my darling, I promise you can touch me wherever and however you please. You said you’d been with others and that you didn’t allow yourself to experience the pleasure you gave to them. So... as your Zhao, I want to make you feel that.”

The brunette placed a soft kiss on Kara’s chin. She leaned in for a tender kiss and as the seconds passed, she let it grow more fevered. Her fingertips were brushing lightly against the underside of Kara’s breast. She could feel the way her breathing pressed Kara’s breast into her hand, almost as if each breath that Kara took urged her on, asked her to touch her more.

Kara looked at Lena and her eyes grew darker, she ran her hands over her back and down over her perfect ass. She kissed her back with passion, her body heating up the longer the kiss went on. She moaned at the soft touches to her breast.

“Zhao, my Zhao you will always be able to touch me I am yours”

Lena was going to take her up on that. For the moment, her kisses drifted to Kara’s jaw and neck while her thumb found a perfect peaked nipple and teased it gently. The brunette hummed appreciatively at Kara’s touches. It sent tendrils of arousal throughout her body and she craved more. The kisses over her neck were beautiful, they ignited her skin, her breath caught as Lena took her nipple and her back arched involuntary at the touch. Her hand moved over her abdomen scratching the back of her hands over them edging towards her breasts and softly circled the soft skin. Lena continued her trail of kisses until they landed on her collarbone then moved to the hollow of her throat. She dipped the tip of her tongue into it then kissed the soft skin above it. She came back up to look into Kara’s eyes. The brunette angled her breast more firmly into Kara’s soft touch as her own hand trailed down the blonde’s body toward her thighs.

Kara giggles lightly at the touch of Lena’s tongue, it tickled in the most pleasurable way, who knew that could make her wriggle. She looked into Lena's eyes and she pressed more into her hands and rubbed her thumbs over her hardened nipples. She leaned forward to capture the lips that called her. Her system feeling every movement of Lena’s hands

Lena’s kisses grew with passion with each passing moment. She was easily lost in the sensations of their mouths moving in sync. Undeterred though, her hand explored over the soft skin of a toned thigh until her hand slipped between thighs, urging them to spread for her.

Kara moaned lightly and moved her thighs to open up for Lena more than eager for the touch of Lena's fingers on her, in her she wasn’t sure how it would feel but she knew she was ready to experience it. Kara’s hand moved from her breast lower down her stomach and brushed over her core.

Lena adjusted her body when Kara spread her legs so that she was straddling Kara’s thigh. She interrupted their kiss and pulled away just enough to look into her girlfriend’s eyes. The brunette’s fingertips reached their destination and she slid them along the blonde’s delicate folds, finding her arousal likely matched her own.

Kara bit her lip to stifle the moan that was trying to burst forth but couldn’t stop her hips rising at the soft touch. His senses normally spread wide were suddenly in sharp focus. She heard every movement. She felt every movement there was nothing outside of the room just her and Lena. She stroked her fingers over her breasts as she slipped her hand between Lena’s thighs

Lena moaned lightly at Kara’s touch, her own hips seeking more. She bit her bottom lip as she wasn’t her girlfriend’s face. With teasing fingers running along the blonde’s core, she easily found the bundle of nerves she was looking for. Lena began forming small circles over Kara’s clit, coaxing the very beginnings of her pleasure out.

Kara couldn’t hold back the moan this time as her hips buckled forward to meet lenas fingers. Every part of her was alive, vibrating at the touch of closeness. She slipped her fingers through lena's folds the warm wetness welcoming her inside as she rubbed the front wall listening and watching for the moment she found the spot. She wanted to touch Lena too, she wanted to feel the woman she loved as much as she wanted her to touch her too.

Lena’s breath caught when Kara’s fingers entered her. Her hips pushed down into rising fingers and she almost forgot what she was supposed to be doing. Almost. Pausing her patterns over Kara’s clit, she moved to withdraw her girlfriend’s fingers from inside of her. She gently brought Kara’s fingers to her lips and licked them clean. 

“Not yet my love...”

The CEO kissed Kara’s lips then descended toward her breasts, stopping to tease and suck and lick each nipple with equal attention. She was enjoying getting to know her girlfriend's body, the dips, the curves and the noises she made when stimulating small areas. She loved every minute of it.

Kara watched as Lena denied her, not once but twice, first by removing her fingers and then by sucking them into her own mouth. She could smell lenas arousal she felt her tongue on her fingers, it was so erotic so sensual Kara whimpered as she watched. When Lena kissed her she got her first taste of Lena, it was unbelievable. A small growl left her chest

“You taste so good”

“Don’t look so upset my love, you will have your turn I promise.” 

She husked, looking up from Kara’s chest. She took one nipple between her teeth and tugged gently just as she slipped a finger inside Kara. A few gentle thrusts then withdrew only to slip inside with two fingers. As Lena found a steady rhythm, she continued to kiss her way down Kara’s torso, sucking and attempting to leave marks before remembering she probably could not.

Kara could feel Lena inside her, the initial thrust a little painful but then all there was Lena, she moved her hips with lena's thrusts and soft moans left her. Lena moving down her body felt like silk, her hair brushing her skin making it feel like it was caressing her. She brushed her hand through her hair, scratching Lena’s scalp no longer able to reach anything else.

Lena finally settled between Kara’s thighs and returned her fingers to their previous pace, enjoying every sound she drew out of her girlfriend. Her own body pulsed with arousal. She inhaled Kara’s scent and used the tip of her tongue to give her folds a long delicious lick until she reached her clit. The brunette sucked it into her mouth then lapped up and down slowly.

Kara continued to scratch lena's head and run her fingers through her hair, as she sucked she turned her hands into fists and moaned louder. The sensation of lena's lips over the most sensitive area she had ever experienced everything was just so sensitive she groaned and had to let go of her hair and fisted the sheets as her hips bucked

Lena worked her tongue over the small bundle of nerves while her fingers found a quicker, harder pace. With each inward thrust she curved her fingers just right to hit the sensitive spot along her front wall.

Kara’s moans and movement were a symphony to Lena’s ears. The woman she loved was climbing toward her first orgasm and the CEO wanted nothing more than to be the one to crest her over that edge. Kara’s hips bucked in rhythm with lena's ministrations as her moans became louder, turning lewd and needy.

“Oh Rao lena that .....”

She panted and pulled her sheet torn and her finger dug into the mattress.

“More please.”

Lena is about to adjust her position to gain a bit more leverage, but fuck, she wants to hear Kara say it. To hear the side of her only she gets. It wasn't something that she expected but now that it was so close she found it was all she could think of, having Kara ask for more, ask for what she wanted, to know that kara wanted it from her, it was intoxicating.

“More what, my love?”

Her fingers never break their pace and her mouth immediately returns to the sensitive wet flesh she’s intended to devouring.

Kara moaned louder and harder, she panted and bucked under Lena. She gripped harder. She didn’t want Lena to stop, her body was tensing all over, there were pools of energy flooding through her.

“More pressure, more of you, just more, Please Rao please Lena”

Lena complied quickly; thrusting her harder and deeper, rubbing her g-spot with each motion. Her tongue moved faster with her face nearly buried into her girlfriend. Her free hand reached around and up until Lena found a hard nipple begging to be pinched. The increase seemed to change the wave of energy it was pulsating over her body; she had never felt anything like this before.

When Lena pinched her nipple she cried out Lena’s name as the waves came crashing around her through her over her she couldn’t tell anymore. Somehow Lena had managed to stimulate her in every way that seemed possible, the soft tongue and sucking, Lena’s lips, the harder touch pushing into her, stimulating the inner walls and then the slightly harder pinch all combining on a spectral level causing her body to erupt in pleasure.

Lena continued her actions, making sure to help Kara ride out her orgasm. She was in awe of every subtle movement and sound. When Kara’s body calmed, she slowly withdrew her fingers and once again indulged in licking them clean. She moved back up Kara’s form and captured her lips in a deep kiss.

Kara was breathless. It was a strange sensation she didn’t need oxygen as much as others and nothing of this world has ever left her like that. She found the tightening of her muscles seemed to disrupt her natural rhythm, that her mind tried to get her to hold her breath to try and push forward with the feelings that were surrounding her. As Lena kissed her deeply she finally let go of the mattress and wrapped her arms around her holding her close and stoking the soft skin. She smiled at Lena and kissed her softly before gasping out.

“Wow I ... that was .... Rao I didn’t know it could feel like that”

Lena continued the kiss then took mercy on her girlfriend and pulled away to allow her to catch her breath. She was indeed proud of her handy work.

“It can, and sometimes more” 

She replied with a tiny smirk. The brunette’s hand gently caressed Kara along any bare skin she could reach. Her expression turned serious for a moment. She whispered out almost scared to hear the words, in this moment, at her most vulnerable, but she knew Kara loved her and it gave her the strength to say the words even if it was only a whisper.

“I love you, Kara.”

Kara slowly regained her breath and gazed at Lena, her whole body still sensitive to the touch of her love. She saw the serious look on her face and smiled. Kara maneuvered her so she was settled above her and looked down smiling.

“I love you too lena, you are my Zhao forever. Can I show you that now?”

A silent yelp left Lena at their switched positions. Her arms looped around Kara’s neck. The brunette still liked the way that word fell from her girlfriend’s lips. She was more than happy to experience the love Kara had for her however she wanted to show it. She pulled her down for a kiss and her hips lifted slightly in search of Kara’s.

“Yes, my love.”

Kara lay above her and looked down in awe at the woman, leaning in and kissing her as she started to move her hands over her naked body. She softly caressed the skin before exploring some sensitive points, the side of her neck and then brushing over her breast. She was in no hurry; she wanted to worship her every inch.

One of Lena’s hands was intertwined with golden locks, encouraging the soft roaming lips along her skin. Her breaths and soft moans fill the silence around them but she’s too attuned to Kara’s every touch that she doesn’t even know what sounds she’s making anymore. She’d never been kissed so tenderly, so lovingly. She wants to beg for more but she’s almost certain her girlfriend knows.

Lena’s scent was thick in the room. Kara could taste it in the air and it was driving her wild, she could hear lena's heart pick up every time she moved closer to her need. She had time to worship her, the rest of their lives, she could put her need aside for Lena, not that she didn’t need her like that too. Her hand moved between lena's thighs as her mouth moved to her breast. Fingers sliding up and down slowly as she alternated soft cold wisps and warm sucking.

“...fuck.”

She gasped out louder than intended, she had not expected Kara to be this good, or her body to be this receptive, things had never been quite like this before. Lena’s body was reacting on its own to everything Kara was doing to her. Her back arched up slightly so that her breast rose to meet Kara’s attentive mouth. Her hips rolled slightly, seeking more contact along her core. She wasn’t going to last long like this. Not for this first round anyway.

Kara could feel every movement, every breath, hear every beat of Lena's heart she was completely enthralled with her fiber. She moved to the over breast and continued her alternate sucking and soft wisps. Slowly she moved her finger into the waiting warmth of Lena. Slow movements in and out curling into her front wall, slowing anytime Lena got to close.

Every second Lena was building toward her climax. Most of what she’d done to Kara earlier had put her nearly halfway there. Her arousal had been no secret. But when Kara’s actions slowed, she whimpered in frustration, tightening her grip in her girlfriend’s hair. She looked into her eyes capturing the azure orbs, and asked a question.

“You’re not going to make this easy, are you?”

Kara looked up at her. She knew that she was teasing, she wanted to explore every part of her, she wanted to take her time, to do things properly, to satisfy four years worth of dreams, desires and fantasies.

“I can if you prefer I wanted you to feel adored, loved worshiped, not something rushed and quick”

Kara moved down her body trailing kisses she would at least taste her Zhao even if it was brief

“Darling wait,” 

Lena said and tried to steady her breathing. She didn’t know what to say to that. For her, it wasn’t rushed. For her, this dance between them had begun much earlier in the evening.

“I... didn’t mean to interrupt you. I do feel loved. More so than I ever have. You’re doing all the right things and my body gives in to you with each touch.”

She had inched down moving her wrist to accommodate nudging the soft thighs further apart. At Lena’s request to wait, She looked up at Lena as her free hand stroked over the thigh and her head rested on the other gazing at her.

“I am glad you feel it Zhao, I will not stop you again”

Lena’s fingers run through Kara’s hair a few times until she’s a bit more out of reach. Her thighs spread wider for her girlfriend, baring her most intimate parts gladly for the blonde. She feels each kiss and touch and they drive her arousal up slowly.

Kara softly licked over her folds moving to her sensitive bundle of nerves, there would be time for more worship but she would keep her word. She sucked softly on her clit and used her tongue to circle revealing in the taste of her love, finally connecting with her. Her fingers moved carefully thrusting and curling with each lick and swirl. A soft moan of appreciation leaving her lips

Lena couldn’t help the way her hips rolled against Kara’s mouth and fingers. Moans and curses fell from her lips, leaving no doubt about how much she was enjoying her girlfriend’s attention. Lena wasn’t above begging, particularly when Kara seemed to know her body so well.

“...Kara... please don’t stop...”

Kara synchronized her tongue flicks with her pressure on her g spot. Hitting both bundles of nerves front and back. She continued before realizing just how close Lena was, she moved her eyes to the emerald orbs, a small smile on her face.

“I won’t”

Lena’s body and Kara had a connection and Lena’s brain was just an extra passenger. She looked down to meet Kara’s beautiful sapphire gaze and reached for her free hand while the brunette’s other hand gripped the sheets. The CEO was seconds away from tumbling into bliss and she wanted to touch some part of her girlfriend when she did.

As if understanding the small movement and what it meant to Lena, Kara reached her hand up and intertwined their fingers, the small smile on her lips showing in her eyes as she increased her pressure just enough to tip the scales. Ensuring the connection with her love physically and more importantly to Lena emotionally, she had so long been kept at arm's length, distanced from people, Kara wanted nothing more than for her to know that she wanted her close, connected.

Lena held onto Kara’s hand tightly as her body began to tense. She threw her head back as the waves of her climax hit her. She moaned out her girlfriend’s name like a reverent prayer. Her inner walls clenched around the skilled fingers giving her pleasure and her clit pulsed wildly. Several long glorious moments passed where nothing else existed except her and Kara.

Slowly to ease out every bit of pleasure Lena could derive Kara watched her in awe. She didn’t think there had ever been a moment when Lena looked more beautiful and more free than now. Once she settled Kara slowly moved, cleaning her fingers on her way to her lover. She kissed her and continued to stroke her softly going back to memorising her body with her finger tips

“Rao your perfect”

Lena’s body came down slowly from the amazing orgasm. She was still somewhat breathless when Kara was above her again she returned the kiss fiercely. Lena smiled and perhaps her eyes were just a bit watery, but her heart was completely open to Kara.

“No my love, you’re perfect. And amazing. And beautiful.”

The exchanges continued throughout the night, taking turns, exploring together making up for the years they had been separated by secrets, lies, miscommunication and oblivious crushes, until both were satiated and fell asleep entwined.


	32. Alex’s guilt

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 19-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

Alex was awake early, she hadn't slept all that well to start with, although Kara had suggested that Lex was doing well she couldn't help but worry about her. She believed that Lena would have made sure that she was alright especially if she was going out for the night but she had a nagging feeling about everything. She had somehow caused the issue and until she was sure that Lex was doing better, see her for herself she wasn't going to be able to get it off her mind. Her mind drifted to the moment she had touched her and the way it had hurt her, she felt terrible about that, and it would appear that this was the least pain that she had caused Lex. her mind thought about the way that she had explained the sensory issues and how she had gripped her hand and rubbed over her wrist there was something about it, the touch from Lex had been nice, soft but firm. She had wondered what it would have been like to be one of Lex’s partners; she wasn't wired that way, but the thought persisted in her mind. She knew that it was a fool's errand, to want something from Lex that she stated she was incapable of giving but she couldn't do it the way Lex did, and they were no longer anonymous to each other.

She decided to go to the café again, yesterday Lex had not been there because she was with Lena. However Alex was sure that Lena would be otherwise engaged today, she had not heard from Kara yet suggesting that the first date went very well. She grabbed her jacket and headed down to the beast pulling out into traffic and heading for the café. She arrived just before seven, and entered ordering a coffee and sitting in a booth, she kept an eye on the door but there was no Lex, there was nothing, no one came in for a full thirty minutes. Alex ate breakfast and then headed back to her home. Kara arrived just after lunch full of excitement and energy. Alex did her best to forget her concerns.

“The gala was amazing, and there was lots to eat and we danced. Rao it was amazing, Lena looked beautiful and she moved so well, she was brilliant and graceful, and introduced me as her girlfriend, hers! We stayed for a few hours and everything was perfect, we were so close and she kissed me and touched me, it was like my whole body was on fire, and we went back to hers, Rao I didn't know what it would be like, but it was, you said it was good with someone you loved but this, oh wow Alex it was more than I ever thought possible she is so caring and kind and everything was just perfect.”

Kara rambled through the words spilling from her in a wave of excitement, she had finished the first volley before she even realized that Alex was only half listening to her, she looked at her and appraised the situation, she appeared distracted, upset, her heart rate and biorhythms were suggesting that she was anxious, worried about something she wasn't even able to give a smile for her sister, following the success of the first date, she thought that Alex was going to try and frowned pulling her brows together and displaying the crinkle.

“Alex you said that you would try, that you would be happy for me, but you can't even listen to me, whatever you're anxious about, it is unfounded Lena isn't trying to hurt me.”

Alex realized that she had not been listening, she was still preoccupied with Lex she looked at Kara and saw the crinkle, she sighed she had not meant to be such a bad sister, she was falling short everywhere letting everyone down. She offered a small smile and gave Kara a hug.

“I’m sorry Kara, I am glad that you had a good night it wasn't Lena that I was thinking about, Lex didn't come to the Café for breakfast again today, I think that whatever I did on our date has upset her, if she ends up hurt or unstable it is my fault, I have hurt her”

Kara understood, Alex always took too much on herself, keeping her safe, keeping her hidden, then protected, looking after her always, she took responsibility for the DEO every agent hurt was Alex’s responsibility, she remembered how it affected her when Kara was hurt, or Vasquez. This was just more evidence that Alex had feelings for her, and it wasn't just responsibility, she liked her alot more than she admitted. She wanted to put Alex’s mind at ease but she was not sure that it would be possible without her seeing Lex for herself, but Kara had no idea where she was. She could ask Lena, however she was not sure how willing Lena would be to have Alex back with Lex, she was worried about her, and her and Alex were not on good terms.

“She was due to have breakfast with Lena today but they delayed as we had our date. I think that she was working in her Lab, not something that I am comfortable with but at least she is well. When are you supposed to be meeting her?”

Alex was more concerned that Lena was not going to be seeing her, if they met on a Sunday then that would be another change to her routine and Alex worries that after what happened on Friday it was too soon for another change. It was only one day before she was supposed to be meeting her, but that was still nearly twenty four hours, she was trying to manage the anxiety, regret, and the increasing emotions for Lex at the same time and it was a lot for Alex, she wasn't easily placated. She wondered how much she had affected Lex? If any of it was positive, after all she knew that what she did Friday hurt her, that she was harmed by her, she just hoped that there was something positive, she didn't want her to pull away, if she was going to get to know her better, then they would need time. Lex had affected so much change in Alex, she had softened her anger at Lena, she had changed her mind about Lex, her as a person, she had opened her eyes to problems within the government that she was already concerned about. No-one had been able to affect so much change in opinion as Lex, she had her excited about the possibilities of working with the kryptonite to help change problems in the world. She looked back to Kara who was clearly still worrying.

“Monday, I am supposed to start working with her Monday”

“Well that is in the morning, if she doesn't arrive then, I will talk to Lena for you, find out where she is, she is probably just working in the lab”

They continued to talk, Alex doing her best to focus on the information about the date, responding more appropriately. The whole time the back of her mind telling her that continued activity off routine would not be helpful to Lex, she was worried that she had pushed her too far. Kara left on an emergency in Metropolis, Clark had called, she waited until she was gone before calling the number Lex had given her again, still straight to voicemail, she sat on her couch and spun the card in her hand. If only she knew where that lab was, she could go and try to find her, to make sure she had done no permanent damage to Lex. As much as she would have tried yesterday to put the concern down to what Lex would be capable of when unstable she had to admit that it was nothing to do with that at the moment, it was a concern for Lex and the damage that Alex has done to her.

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 20-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

Alex was up early and showered and dressed, she was sure that she would be appropriately dressed for work and smelling better than the last time that they met, she may have been taking more care in her appearance, she may have been trying to be appealing, but she may have also been lying to herself about the reason why. She wanted to be appealing to Lex, she wanted to hope that Lex would like her back, she knew logically that it wasn't the case but at the same time she was a Danvers and lost causes were their thing. It had worked for Kara, if last night was anything to go by, or Kara’s version it was perfect. She made her way to the Café and arrived early, ordering coffee and sitting in the booth that would be populated by Lex, she almost expected the waiting staff to move her along, however she noticed the same redhead that had noticed her before, as such she assumed that the woman had expected her to be meeting Lex. At eight she gave up hope that Lex would be coming the café started to fill from around seven thirty, and was now filled with people, she understood now why Lex ate between seven and seven thirty, by eight there were so many people in the café it was loud and filled with people taking and interacting even Alex in her booth had been joined by others. She finally left, people wanting to eat before going to work.

She took out the card that Lex had given her and looked at how crumpled it was. She didn't know why she bothered. She knew the number off by heart; she had dialed it so many times, looked at the elegant script of Lex’s writing. She dialed the number and this time she didn't hang up, when it went straight to voicemail she left a message.

“Good morning Lex, it's Alex Danvers, I arrived at the café as instructed to be taken to the Lab, however you were not here, if you can call me back to arrange another start date, unless you have changed your mind about the position?”

She disconnected the call and headed home, she tried to distract herself with the super friend work and studied the schematics. It didn't keep her mind busy enough she continued to check her phone wondering if Lex had been in contact. Every time she looked at the phone there was no difference. If she was not going to be working with Lex she would need a new position, but that was of little comfort at the moment, she was more interested in seeing for herself that Lex was alright.

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 21-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

Alex woke it was almost becoming routine now, there was still no word from Lex, she had thought about contacting Kara to talk to Lena, she had told her that Lex and Lena were scheduled for breakfast this morning, it was rude, she knew it, she had watched them before but that was not planned this time it would be, she was purposefully going to the café, she wouldn't interrupt, but she just wanted to see that she was ok. She kept telling herself that as long as she could see that Lex was doing alright she could walk away, that it didn't matter that the chance for an amazing opportunity was missed. She believed that Lena would make sure that nothing would happen to Kara, she believed that Lex wasn't a threat, but she couldn't stop herself wondering what the bigger missed opportunity may be. The chance to get to know Lex. Once again she headed to the café, and sat in the seat she had chosen the first time she had gone to spy on Lex. She waited with her coffee, and only looked up again when the bell went on the door, it was Lena, she was early, she didn't go to the booth but right to the counter and picked up two bags before turning and heading back out, Alex watched as she got into a car that was waiting and left.

Lena knew that Lex wouldn't be at the Café, she had arranged to pick up the food and take it to her, if Alex had followed she may have been able to find where Lex was working, to see her. It seemed that no matter what she did there was no tracking down Lex. There was something about this that caused more interest in Alex, it was like the most impressive game of playing hard to get that Alex had ever been part of. Although she wasn't sure that it was a game that Lex was intending to play, what if the damage she had done to her had been worse than Lena thought what if she was still incapacitated in some way, if Lena was keeping it quiet so no one knew, she had not wanted her mother to treat Lena. She knew confronting Lena wouldn't get her anywhere, but maybe she would use her other connections. She pulled out her phone and messaged Vasquez and invited her for a bite. She waited for her to arrive at the Café.

“Hey Vasquez, over here.”

“Alex, I have a first name you know and as you're no longer my boss it may be night for you to use it.”

Alex laughed and nodded at her, she pushed over the coffee and waited for her to take a seat. She handed over the pad she had brought with the information about the super friends, and smiled. They talked for a little about the options and they went through the staff at the DEO as to who might be interested in taking a position. Once they had been talking for a while Alex looked up and bit her lip before asking.

“So how is the new Director holding up?”

“Well Brainy and myself have taken over all of your old responsibilities so she has vanished again, only now she isn’t even bothering to come in to get the paperwork, some driver picks them up and takes them away and then brings things back signed, why the interest? Did the date not go well?”

Alex rubbed the back of her neck with the hand and rolled her neck, she was busted and she knew it, Vasquez knew her well Alex never asked anything innocently, there was always something that was in the back of her mind. She could feel the flush starting on her neck and she smiled at her and explained the situation, which caused her to laugh.

“Damn Alex, you really are a useless Lesbian.”

They talked for an hour or so and Alex was encouraged to just go and see Lena, she left the café and ignored the advice opting to go home instead, only this time she cracked open the scotch. The talk with Vasquez had unsettled her, Lex was not going to the DEO, and wasn't following her normal routine. She knew that she didn't have any love for the DEO but she did like her routine, she didn't seem like someone to forget a meeting. The more she drank the more she thought that talking to Lena was a bad idea, she would blame Alex for what happened as much as she blamed herself, it would appear that whatever the treatment was it wasn't successful, Lex was still in pain and it was Alex’s fault, she drank until she passed out.

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 13:30………

Alex woke very late, she was hungover and feeling very unwell, she moved to the kitchen to make coffee and saw that she had a number of missed calls from Kara and groaned, she sent her a message to stop her worrying. She drank her coffee, there was nothing from Lex she tried again and found that there was once again no change, straight to voicemail. She spent the rest of the day just waiting, waiting to feel better waiting to hear from Lex, waiting just to feel better but the day came and went, it was not until the evening that Kara made her presence known.

“Hey Alex, how are you? You have been a little distant, is everything alright?”

Alex turned to look at the open window, watching her enter and smiled she had turned up with Pizza and Potstickers. She walked across the room putting the food on the table and looked at Alex, she smiled and grabbed her for a hug, Alex surrendered to it and melted into the hug, she didn't realize how much she had needed it.

“Well I have been trying to see Lex, but she didn't turn up at the Café and she isn't answering her phone, it looks like I am not going to be working with her after all, maybe you need to ask Lena to check the containment for the Kryptonite, it looks like whatever I did Friday has revoked my employment opportunity.”

Kara looked at her and wondered what was upsetting her more, the lack of a job opportunity or not getting to see Lex. The way that Alex was blaming herself for the incident Friday showed how much she liked her, not to mention the clear smell of scotch in the air, she picked up the Potstickers and started popping them in her mouth, she was wondering why she hadn't asked Lena. Herself at this point, or had her speak to Lena for her. This was reminiscent of the time that Alex wouldn't leave the meds bay when she had been injured. Alex had blamed herself and she wouldn't move until she was healed. She thought that she had hurt Lex; she knew Alex wouldn’t rest until she had seen her.

“Lena isn't worried about Lex, they had breakfast yesterday, if you want me to call her to let her know Lex missed your breakfast I said that I would.”

“I don't think that Lena will want me anywhere near Lex, I think that it would be better to just forget it, don’t put pressure on your relationship over this Kara”

Alex may not be fully on board with the relationship but she wouldn't put it in danger because she messed up, she had messed up enough without putting Kara’s happiness in jeopardy, she wasn't going to have that on her conscience too. After a few more volleys Alex agreed to talk to Lena herself, she didn't want Kara as the go between and Kara finally agreed. It had taken a while but they had finally agreed. After they finished the food and all of Alex’s Ice-cream Kara finally left. Leaving Alex to wonder what to do, Kara had told her they would be having breakfast the next morning, she could meet Lena at the Café, maybe taking a coffee to Lena instead would be better than an ambush.

Andrews Cafe (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

Alex had turned up early, she would wait to see if Lena arrived, if Lex came, if she could just see her she wouldn't need to bother Lena, she had been chatting to the red head, who had noticed Alex’s frequent visits, they has been chatting for about fifteen minutes before a call came in, Alex herd the last thing she said clearly.

“Yes Miss Luthor, I will have the breakfast ready for pick up at the normal time.”

Alex looked at her and grinned, this was the first time she was going to be able to get information without highlighting the bad case of pining like a useless lesbian she had been carrying around. She leaned onto the counter and gave her best grin. She managed to find out that there had been pickups every day, that sometimes Lena came in and sometimes it was a man, she was quite chatty once Alex got her going, so much for the confidentiality that Lex thought she had there. That meant that Lex was maintaining the routine to a degree but not appearing herself. She moved from the counter and took a seat watching Lena walk in. She looked happy, there was a spring in her step and a smile on her face, she didn't look like someone who was trying to deal with an unstable sister. Alex decided to approach.

“Hi Lena, I was wondering if you have seen you sister, we had a meeting Monday but she didn't make it and I can't get her on the phone.”

Lena heard Alex’s voice as she turned as she finished assembling the phone in her hand and looked at Alex, she had not been expecting to see her, but then Lex had dubbed her the inconsistent variable, if she had wanted to get a message to Lex she could have just asked. Why didn't she just pick up the phone and call her, it was very strange. Lex had been a little focused lately she had mentioned Alex on many occasions but had not heard from her, it wasn't until Lena had suggested that she call her on Tuesday that Lex even realized that she had lost her phone, Lena was putting a new one together now. She raised her brow and smiled.

“Well once I get to breakfast I will give her this replacement and I am sure she will answer, but can you wait until after breakfast she doesn't like interruptions, any more than she liked her breakfast being late, I have to go, she is no fun when she is hungry, for what it is worth she only realized she didn't have the phone when she was going to call you.”

Lena grinned as she walked past, placing her hand on Alex’s shoulder.


	33. Back on track.

Lex’s Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

It had been a number of days and the last security adaptation to the Lab was nearly done, she had spoken to Lena about her security and they had found a number of things that could use improvement, Lex was not convinced that it was needed but Lena insisted. It wasn't that she didn't trust her she knew that, the information regarding the change was as a result of Lex’s own question. She had informed Lena that Alex was due to visit the next day and Lex had asked Lena though that she would be satisfied with the precautions. Lena had made some interesting observations and although she didn't believe that there was a need for the additional security but she didn't want Alex to be upset. She was looking forward to having Alex there and if the additional security was something that she would appreciate, Lex could take a few days to do it. The thought of Alex had brought a smile to her face and she threw herself into the changes. When Lena arrived on tuesday with Breakfast Lex realized that she had not contacted Alex, and she felt an odd wave come over her, her stomach had contracted and she felt nauseated, she couldn't stop thinking about the way she had been so rude to Alex. 

It was then that she realized that she didn't have her phone, she explained to Lena about the mishap with decorum and that she had violated a social convention, she spoke about the way she was feeling and Lena developed a strange look on her face. There was a small smirk, on half her lips, her brow had arched and she had tilted her head, there was an almost glassy look to her eyes, Lex couldn't recall a time that she had seen that look on Lena’s face and she seemed to refuse to explain. She promised to get her a new phone while she continued the modifications. Although she did offer her phone to connect with Alex, Lex didn't know what to say or what she was feeling, she didn't like unexpected sensations. Lex moved over to the panel and initiated the new system and waited until her eyes adjusted it was all quite bright. She made a quick test and then turned it off. Lena should be there shortly, she was hungry and wanted her replacement phone, she had decided what to say to Alex and was looking forward to showing her the new precautions.

“Lexi, I have breakfast, sorry I am a little late but I ran into Alex in the Café, I think she was looking for you, I have told her that you didn't have your phone, I have the replacement with me. Lexi where are you?”

Lex could hear her calling out from the other room, and moved through the containment lab towards Lena’s voice, she wasn’t late, she was right on time, Lex couldn't help but wonder why she had suggested she was late? Was it just a ploy to mention Alex, she had found that Lena initiated conversations about her on numerous occasions in the past few days, every time that Lena came to help with the security, or brought her food. If Lex didn't know that Lena was dating the other Danvers woman she would have been convinced she was interested in Alex herself. She moved through the door and smiled at her sister, although the strange feeling in her stomach had returned the moment Alex was mentioned. Lex wondered what else transpired between Lena and Alex. Lena had made a number of attempts to get Lex to open up and talk about Alex, wanting her to evaluate the relationship, think about Alex as someone that she could get to know better. She moved into the lab next to Lena, and picked up the take away sitting at the table.

“Thank you for breakfast, and the phone, I will call Alex later, invite her to meet me tomorrow the last of the modifications that you suggested are now complete. I think that it will suffice now, not that I thought it was necessary. However I am now finished to the standards that you requested and it is ready for inspection.”

Lena wondered who she was trying to impress she knew that Lexi didn't feel she needed to impress her, but Alex she was seeing differently even if she didn't believe it herself yet, Lexi struggled with a lot of human interaction, she didn't understand the emotions she experienced, or the way that she reacted to the sensations her body experienced, she had noticed that Alex wasn’t quite her normal self and had reacted to the news about Lex favorably. Her and Kara had spoken about the two of them, oblivious to the reactions that they were having in each other, Alex had once said that both Lena and Kara were oblivious, it seemed to be a Danvers and Luthor trait.

“I am sure that she will be calling soon, she seemed quite eager to talk to you, Kara said that she had been at the Café every morning, and she confirmed that she had called, maybe she left a message?”

Lex’s heart race increased and the tightening of her stomach informed her that this was a nervous reaction, but why was she nervous, she had been working non stop to get everything ready for Alex to come to the lab, she was sure all the additional extravagant security protocols would satisfy even the protective Danvers sister. So why was she nervous about the thought of speaking to her, that nauseated feeling was back and she was sweating a little, she had not meant to cause any distress, she had been in breach of social protocols, her lessons with her mother had taught her better. There seemed to have been an adverse reaction within Alex herself and that wasn't something that she was comfortable with. She was trying to understand the feeling but she was unable to match it to anything like this, the only times that she had felt like this was when things had gone wrong and people were hurt. Although individuals held little interest she never set out to hurt anyone. She was aware that collateral damage was often the byproduct of invention this feeling was present then although she didn't understand it then either.

Lena noticed that Lexi had been somewhat lost in thought she was wondering what she was thinking about. She seemed to be confused, she recognized this look on her face. She placed her hand onto her arm and squeezed lightly, she needed Lex to concentrate on her for a moment.

“Lexi, what is it? Maybe I can help alleviate some of the confusion, I can see that you are trying to understand something, tell me and I can offer support.”

Lex had explained the sensations that she was feeling the times she had felt it before and Lena had suggested that it was an emotion, it was guilt, Lena believed that she was experiencing guilt. Lex couldn't understand the function of such an emotion, how did feeling like you were sick going to help in any function and why would she feel guilty about the interaction with Alex. Lena hypothesized that she cared about her, that knowing that there was some distress caused by her social conventional laps was making her feel this way. The conversation continued through breakfast and Lex had a lot to think about. Once Lena was gone she turned on the phone, there were over forty missed calls and one message. Seeing the level of missed calls increased the unsettling feeling and Lex had to conclude that it was indeed connected to the distress caused in Alex. Lex had to conclude that there was an aspect of the hypothesis that she did in fact care about Alex. she listened to the voicemail.

“Good morning Lex, it's Alex Danvers, I arrived at the café as instructed to be taken to the Lab, however you were not here, if you can call me back to arrange another start date, unless you have changed your mind about the position?”

The sound of Alex’s voice was off, she sounded different, she was polite and factual but her voice had wavered, there was something that she was not saying, she wasn't able to understand the change in her or the way that she was speaking. She decided to call Alex and invite her over tomorrow, she would be better equipped to understand if she were able to see the other woman, look at her facial expressions. She dialed the number and waited for Alex to answer.

Alex’s apartment (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:30………

Alex had returned home and was sitting in her apartment, she was once again rotating the card in her hand. Lex had breakfast between seven and seven thirty, she would be finished, but the possibility that Lena and Lex may have more time together than her allotted time played on her mind. She didn't want to interrupt them, she had been witness to the interactions, and Kara’s commentary backed up what she had seen there was a loving relationship there, and she wanted Lex to have that time without interruption. She put down the card and headed to the kitchen, she made a coffee and then returned to her seat. She wished she had contacted Lena earlier; she didn't seem to have any reservations about her looking for Lex, she had let her preconceptions about Lena stop her from making the most logical action, instead she staked the café, spoke to others, looked for information about Lex without using the most obvious source. She sighed, maybe Lena was different? Maybe this version of her was at least. The change in her perceptions since meeting Lex, knowing that they were not the originals, had an effect that she couldn't understand, but at the same time she found the change welcome. It was a little past eight when her phone went off, she lifted the device and saw the number that she had memorized staring back at her.

“Danvers”

“Yet again an inconsistency that I had not anticipated Miss Danvers, I would have thought that you would answer your personal phone in a less formal manner. I apologize that I haven't been in contact, it was rude not to have contacted you prior to today, if you are still interested in the opportunity as your voicemail suggested I will meet you tomorrow at seven.”

Alex noted that the initial statement wasn't quite accurate, Lex knew that she always responded to the DEO with her last name, it was protocol to avoid anyone gaining sensitive information, Alex had worked there for many years and one could easily anticipate this response, she wondered if this was some kind of inside joke, Alex being a inconsistent variable. The rest of the message seemed to be within Lex’s communication skills; she had chuckled lightly as she heard Lex’s opening, she was more than happy at the offer, she wanted to see Lex and the offer was no less enticing than it had been before.

“I am the one that needs to apologize Lex, I am still not sure what I did on Friday but I didn't mean to cause any distress, I will be happy to meet you tomorrow, I have been concerned that I had upset you”

“Need I remind you that I don't experience emotions as you do Alex, your behavior at dinner was more than acceptable, you have not caused any damage, distress or upset, I will see you in the morning.”

Alex registered the final comment as a dismissal, it was impressive how Lex could do that without her feeling actually dismissed, there was never any finality about it, no power just that the need for conversation was over. It didn't surprise her when there was no further communication before the phone went dead, maybe Alex could remind her of a social convention, the art of goodbye. She ran her hand through her hair, feeling better now knowing that Lex was indeed ok and that she would be seeing her in the morning.

Lex’s Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 08:15………

Lex listened to Alex’s apology, the nauseated feeling increased, when Alex suggested that she was concerned, she had thought that she had upset Lex and she wasn't happy about her miss step with social convention, and the thought that it had caused Alex difficulties made things worse. However there was another sensation that occurred with Alex being on the phone her heart seemed to feel lighter again, she was glad to hear from the woman, she turned off the phone and placed it on the side. She would get to see Alex for herself in the morning, she was looking forward to getting to know her better, she found her memory dwelled on the small chuckle that came from her, Lex had not said anything intentionally funny, she had taken Lena’s advise and tried to break the ice before talking, it was a new thing that Lena was trying to get her to do. She didn't see the point however the sound it elicited from Alex, maybe made it worth it.

Andrews Café (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 06:50………

Alex had woken early and showered before heading to the café, when she arrived she walked in and made the order for her and asked for Lex’s usual also, she turned and looked at the booth to see that Lex was already there. She smiled and walked over to her, hoping that the past few days with little sleep and too much alcohol did not show, she had not managed the best impressions yet. She arrived at the booth and slid into the seat opposite Lex, she looked like she was scanning her, there was an unsettling feeling, she felt like Lex could see inside her somehow, would she be able to see her interest, her attraction? The slightly worn look to her appearance. She placed the food and coffee down and offered a small smile before running her hand through her hair.

“So Friday was the biggest fight I have ever had with Kara, I thought the one about Maggie would be a top the list for a long time to come, this was definitely bigger. She seems to have come around a little and is not worried about me working with you, I am not sure if it was me or your sister that convinced her but it had evened out. I did say that I would be back for the company and the opportunity.”

Lex had watched as she entered, she looked tired and troubled. Alex looked like she was uncomfortable with her gaze as she watched her move to the table and sit. She waited and soon enough Alex arrived at the table and put down food. She took the coffee in hand and looked up at her.

“Yes you did, you also brought my breakfast. This is the second time you have joined me, a little sub par; the first after a rough night with Maggie, the second after the biggest argument with your saint since her, it must have been some fight to have you looking so tired a week later.”

Lex meant no condescension or any belittle meant she was stating facts. It seemed to her that the interactions with her and the subsequent week had had a negative effect on the woman, and the unpleasant nauseated feeling returned. She thought that Lena may be right there could be a feeling of guilt. As much as she wanted to get to know Alex she felt that this joint venture was hurting her.

“Both these events have taken place after discussions with me, I appear to be a bad omen regardless; yet you're here anyway and you brought breakfast to show you want to be. Although I don’t feel that is the case, and will be less so shortly, but maybe that is for the best”

Her eyes held the sadness the façade didn’t show. Lex took a sip of coffee and looked at the red head. She still fascinated her, what she was doing made sense only if she was here to stop Lex, to allow her existing relationships to be damaged by working with Lex legitimately. Lex didn't feel that this was the case but at the same time she couldn't just ignore the information that Alex chose to share. Lena’s pill had helped though, she would be lost now without it, it was better than her mother's treatments and she was glad that she had Lena. she wanted to hope for the best that Alex really was as excited as she appeared to be working with her.

“To continue the research I will need blood and hair samples.”

Alex listened to Lex, she was not taking a pot shot at her. She knew that, although she didn't like the way that Lex was thinking, after all she was suggesting that interaction with Lex was damaging her. She had had an argument with Kara, she had had an unpleasant interaction with Maggie, but they were not Lex’s fault. Well maybe the argument with Kara was but that wasn't because of their discussion it was more about the Kryptonite, and it wouldn't have mattered who had that. Alex had been thinking about the interactions with Lex, how much they had helped, not just to understand the change in the universe but also how easily she was able to challenge her preconceptions, the progress that could be made with Lex’s research. She heard the request but was confused.

“Why would my blood and hair be of any use, I am just a ordinary human, you can get mere human DNA from anywhere, why would you want that?”

Lex could see that she didn’t have Alex’s full attention, she was in her mind, she would most likely have to repeat herself, she didn’t enjoy that part of conversing. When Alex finally spoke she said she was in and then the question that confirmed Lex's conclusion. She wasn’t necessarily going to like the answer. Lex had continued to eat as they talked, making her way through the food steadily.

“Your no mere human Alex if you were I would have lost interest by now, it is not your blood but Kara’s I will need and as you wish to keep her out of this that may be a little bit more difficult to get, and you may not be as ready to agree”

Lex had finished her breakfast and she looked at Alex, she didn’t want to discuss this here and she needed to show Alex what she meant. She wasn't sure that Alex would be all that happy about the thought of her having Kryptonian DNA but the need for her to protect her sister was innate in her, it was the one thing that she could always count on, although the actions were not predictable the need to protect her was.

“I used to have samples of blood however they are now depleted, I have to take you to the lab to fully explain, the only way for me to predict the effects of the kryptonite is with samples. I can show you if you are willing to extend enough trust to come with me?”

Lex wasn’t sure which response she would get Alex was still such a wild card to her, she smiled softly and took her hand for a moment. She hoped that the contact would reassure Alex, after all this was one of the main reasons that humans initiated physical contact.

“It will be easier to comprehend if I can show you”

Alex brought herself back to the conversation, getting blood from Kara was no small feat, neither was getting hair, it wasn't like she could just cut it or draw it without kryptonite and that meant subjecting Kara to it. That was something that she never liked to do. Not to mention that although Kara appeared to have mellowed to the idea of her working with Lex she wasn't sure that she would be willing to just give up DNA. The last person that had her DNA broke into the fortress and almost killed all the aliens on the planet with a kryptonian weapon. Although Kara didn't think of Lena in the same way as Lillian, she was not sure that Lex would be afforded the same benefit of doubt, not yet any way.

“That could be difficult, but I will try, we are both finished. Why don't you lead the way? I trust you to take me to your evil genius lair, dampened and hidden from detection”

Alex winked and hoped that Lex had understood it was just a joke as she stood and held the door for her.


	34. Building trust.

Andrews Café (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:30………

She sat and waited until Alex finally spoke, and agreed to come even calling it an evil genius layer. Lex was now used to Alex’s joking, she was punctuating them with a wink, which suggested that she had realized that Lex struggled with catching humor. Lex looked up at her and smiled before looking her in the eye.

“I suppose this is where I do the evil laugh and look to the fourth wall with a glint in my eye”

Lex stood and followed her, when Alex held the door for her she blinked a few times, it wasn’t as if no one had; although they were normally doormen or drivers, no one had done this just because, she wondered what that meant, why would she hold the door for her this way? It was normally done by men with a romantic interest in their companion, a part of chivalry.

“Well aren’t you the charmer Danvers, so chivalrous, a pleasant surprise, keep going this way and I will start to believe you actually like me”

Lex stepped out to the car and the driver opened the door, she smiled and nodded before saying route two and slid into the car. Once inside she waited for Alex the glass couldn’t be seen through either way and the car had a dispersion field on it the only thing would be a hovering Kryptonian, but route two would sort that out.

“Come on Alex I don’t bite, not unless I am asked to”

She wasn't sure if that was a joke or a statement either, there was only one way to take it, there was a sexual innuendo in there and Alex could feel the flush on her neck. Alex didn't know if Lex learned it from Lena or the other way around, but it would appear both of the Luthor women had an uncanny ability to make the Danvers girls a little crazy and blush easily. It wasn't a surprise when it came to Kara but Alex was above that, or so she thought however it would appear that did not apply to Lex. She was clearly feeling better than she was on Friday. It was almost like whatever Lena did stabilize her and gave her additional freedom, as she meant to be funny, between the sexual comment and the evil layer joke she wasn't sure what was going on. Was Lex being intentionally funny she wasn't even sure of that. All she truly knew was that the blush was creeping up her neck and across her cheeks. She needed to get her mind on something else.

“Well I can imagine that Lena has told you all about me and that I am stubborn, a maverick, a bad influence, but hey she hasn’t stopped you allowing me into your secret lair, I am not entirely sure what one wears to work when they work for an evil genius, am I dressed appropriately?”

Lex surveyed her clothes, Alex was dressed comfortably and sensibly, the jeans were cut well to show off her assets, Lex observed there were a number, the T-shirt and leather jacket combo accentuated both her chest and her strong frame. Lex realized that she was staring and gave a small smile, she was not sure what the right answer was or even one that would fall in the reins of humor. Lex had noted that Alex used humor a lot the looks she gave and the general way she spoke, Lex knew that it was supposed to be funny regardless of if she understood it or now. Lena often said that using a similar situation that is In context but different can be an easy way to make a joke, the formula was simple but it was an effort. She remembered a film that Lena had made her watch about an evil scientist, and scanned through the memory before answering.

“Well a pearl necklace and stockings, suspenders and a lab coat would have been more appropriate, or was it the French maid that was the woman in that scenario?”

Lex thought about it for a moment, her mind replaying the conversations, Lena always encouraged her interest in people, although didn’t push. She wanted her to be happy and settled although it was a stretch to imagine. Alex she had fond words for although the worry was evident on her face. She wondered why it was important to have Lena think of her fondly, Alex didn't think the same of Lena, or was that opinion changing too?

“She speaks of you well Alex, and encourages me to not be so insular, although she was worried because she knows you are an anomaly and she is aware of how I struggle with that”

The car had moved a few blocks over before entering the underground structure and returning to the lab across the road. When it came to a stop the door opened the driver letting them Lex move to the elevator and waited for Alex. She placed her hand on the panel.

“Luthor, Lex plus one, authorization for scan and store”

Alex laughed, that was a joke, that was definitely a joke, although Alex didn't think she was much of a Frankfurter or a Magenta but there was a definite attempt to communicate with her on her level. Alex loved banter and joking maybe there would be another dimension to her friendship? Working relationship with Lex? She was more than happy to engage with her, she had already realized that she needed to give her a pointer in regards to the humor, Kara had confirmed that. She appreciated Lex’s effort though it was like that moment when she touched Lena in the café, a moment where Lex reached out. She felt a little guilty about the last interaction with Lena. She didn't want her near Kara and made it clear yet Lena had been kind about her, she was a better person than Alex gave her credit for. When Lex mentioned abnormalities and how she struggled, she tilted her head, the abnormality, the inconsistent variable, wild card, these had all been things that Lex had said about her at some point, and now she was saying she had difficulties with her. She was wondering if it was the change? The way she couldn't predict her?

“What do you mean Lex? What abnormalities and how do they affect you? What is it that you struggle with?”

“Alex dear; don’t be so cliché, you and I both know that you have noticed some of my unusual traits and behaviors. We are both aware of your powers of perception and deduction, playing dumb is not really going to work”

The doors opened as the scan finished and Lex placed her hand on Alex back guiding her inside.

“I don’t experience emotion as you do, I like my routine, patterns and the reliability of variables are considered comforting I suppose, as I mentioned on our first discussion, you are a statistical anomaly, an inconsistent variable, that means I cannot adequately predict your behaviors, this causes my equilibrium to shift”

She moved to face her. She wasn't sure how much Alex had deduced but she was more than aware that her behavior had been noticed. Alex was not just modest as much as she was lacking in self confidence. She wasn’t sure why but it seemed like it was important to convey this while looking at her.

“That is why superman or Clark is so difficult for me, he affects me more than most, your effect however, I am learning to manage, you seem to create an anomaly within me, normally patterns are disturbed but I adapt”

She turned back and the doors opened, revealing the well equipped lab, and Lex stepped out. She wanted to acknowledge that there was an issue with the supers in general, that it wasn't just Kara, it also wasn't that they were aliens she didn't want Alex to think that she was anti alien, she was not her mother.

“I feel I should be giving an evil monologue, in keeping with your jokes however, shall we get started?”

Alex felt the hand on her back there was something about the contact that caught her attention, there was no need to touch her and Lex had not particularly displayed a lot of tactile behaviors. It was firm and with purpose as she had stated but it wasn't unpleasant in any way, there was something comforting to it, she couldn't help but smile. Alex knew a little more than she let on but not in the way that Lex thought after all there was some truth she had learned a lot about Lex but nowhere near enough, after all the date went south very quickly and she was not really any closer to understanding why, Lex had been charming and thoughtful before she had become unsettled, and now she was joking and talking well but she wasn't sure what kind of thing would change that. She listened to what Alex was saying and although Lex was confirming the things that she had noticed it was not all that she had said. Her mind focused on the information about superman, it was a very interesting statement, she was like him a difficulty for Lex yet she had offered her a position and was allowing her closer.

“You have made comparisons between myself and superman, you have difficulties with both of us due to our inconsistency, how do I know that you will be able to continue to manage your difficulties with me? You have displayed on many occasions that you really do not like him, why will that be different with me?”

Lex’s body stiffened as a million things when through her mind at once, she stood quietly for a moment as they flitted through her mind. Superman/Clark true/omissions, danger/partnership. Could she give this information to Alex; she was already dangerously close to being able to unravel her. She knew that giving the whole truth would cause a problem and she didn’t know how long Lena’s treatment would last under that pressure. She decided that she could answer although she would need to try to filter her responses.

“This is a very unpredictable conversation Alex, I surmise that what was meant to be a comforting statement didn’t have its desired effect, in the interest of us working together I should offer you a little more trust? After all you did come here knowing that you would not be able to reach help”

She wondered how to start and what to divulge, there was so much interconnection with everything, cause and effect, it seemed like the variables were all as connected as the weave in a tapestry and one loose thread could see her unravel again.

“It will be a long story Alex and I don’t know if you want to spend that much time listening to the truth, or even if you will believe it, however as much as I would hope that not wanting to hurt your sister by hurting Lena applies in your actions with her, hurting or allowing me to be hurt will cause Lena pain, so I need you to promise if anything unusual happens while we talk about what you have already seen, you call Lena”

Lex wasn’t sure if she could trust her and the thought of being locked in again at the mercy of men made her shudder, she hoped that Alex was worth the risk she was opening herself up to.

Alex wondered what she was asking? If she cared enough to help Lex if she was in distress? What was happening here the way Lex was talking it sounded like she was about to take a trip with Alice through the looking glass, one part of her wanted to get the information on offer to better understand Lex, to be closer to her maybe, she knew that she liked her so far and she wondered what Lex was thinking about sharing. This would be more trust on Lex’s part than she would have expected, the other part of her was concerned about what would happen or could happen to Lex. She had not forgotten last week and how the situation deteriorated leading to her leaving quickly and disappearing for a week. Lena what treatment had Lena given her that made her think that she would need her again, was there a need for more treatments? She wouldn't get these answers if she refused. She moved herself to one of the chairs in the Lab, and sat down, she had been old enough to see the male Lex fight with superman and knew that the female version had also. She believed it when Clark had said that Lex was dangerous, but at the same time she trusted Lex. She would agree, she had no choice really she wanted to know Lex, the situation was a little uncomfortable.

“Well Lex you know how to make a girl feel safe, when in a secret base, I understand, I am ready, and I would like to hear it.”

Lex watched her closely as she spoke, she made what appears to be another joke. She could only conclude that Alex was feeling a little uncomfortable, maybe she thought that if she had an adverse reaction it would result in something like the battles with superman, that Lex would try to hurt her.

“Putting people at ease not an obvious Luthor trait although I’ve be told I can be charming”

Alex sat and seemed to settle at the response, her words less explicit than she would have liked but she hoped that Alex would at least call Lena even if she left her there. She didn't see Alex as someone that would just abandon her if she was in trouble or in need, but that didn't mean that she would call Lena specifically, although she had to trust her with this, or she couldn't continue to tell her the rest. It was a leap of faith she supposed was ironic for a woman who believed in science.

“Lena was not the only one to receive a precarious amount of damage at the hands of our mother; where as she was neglected, rejected and subjected to abuse and ridicule at an unimaginable level; I was the focus of my mother's attention”

Lex turned thinking back to her earliest memory, she was three maybe when she first remembers the fighting, the screaming between her parents so loud that it felt like razors in her ears.

“My father had dubbed me defective, and my mother wouldn’t hear of it, of course it’s her hubris and self righteous indignation, her ego would not allow her to believe that something she made would be defective.”

Lex rolled her neck the conversation was not to her liking, she wanted to remain stable, to get Lane. But she could feel the tale tell signs of her body tightening.

“Mothers experiments and treatments became the focus and when she had achieved her goal and I was functional she was triumphant; however it left scars and difficulties within my mind that have had profound effects”

Lex turned back and began to count on her fingers she needed something to focus on to manage to keep her words measured and precise, not to give away too much.

“When I lose my equilibrium I lose control and behave inexplicably, one such time lead me to superman although he was not then, he was Clark my best friend who knew everything about me, even the things mother insist I hide”

Alex smirked when Lex called herself charming, it was a word that she had thought herself connected to the woman, but it wasn't in a typical way, it was like her honesty and directness was another kind of charm. People spent their whole lives moderating their thoughts and minds saying what people wanted to hear but Lex didn’t and it was refreshing, endearing and yes charming. Alex knew that Lena had an unhappy childhood, but that wasn't something that she knew about in detail, it was small bits of information. She had never stopped to think about Lex or how she would have been affected. She had always assumed that Lex had been the golden child, that she was the one that Lillian would have showered praise on but it would appear that the attention of the parents in the Luthor house was as damaging as the lack of it. 

“I don't understand, what was wrong with you? You don't seem to have any issues, what was so bad your father would say that you were defective and that your father would decide you needed curing?”

Alex’s question offered a little reprieve although it wasn’t something that she should talk about it was less difficult . She looked up and offered a half smile.

“I didn’t talk, or interact with the world around me unless it was something I could take apart, my only vocalizations were screams when I was touched or things were bright or loud, as you are aware I have some difficulties with that”

The reprieve was over too soon. The tapping of her fingers increased and Lex took a few deep breaths this was the point where it could all go wrong, this was the point of the “accident” that changed everything. She forced away the voices she recited numbers, she looked up at Alex her eyes locking into the hazel orbs. Would she be like him if she spoke more? The fear in her eyes was palpable.

“I had what was listed as an accident; it was a carefully planned and perfectly executed attempt to end my life. I am still however here, I was given treatments by my mother; one thing became fixated in my mind. Where did I make the miscalculation”

Lex remembered having the river dragged and the car returned there was nothing wrong with anything; just fingerprints in the roof where it was pulled back.

“My miscalculation was Clark, as time went on more inexplicable things kept happening and then came the man of steel! Everything made sense I had been denied my rest on a whim of another”

Alex was horrified at that, Lex was born with special needs, communication needs, not a defect, there were people all over the world that had needs there were recognized support guidance, none of which included ECT or hormone suppressants and whatever else that Lillian had done to her. She hated that woman, so much she had no idea why she was allowed near people, how she became a doctor was beyond Alex. how could any mother do this to her child, she was already in a position that she wanted to protect Lex in every way possible, to find a way to undo the damage, to show her care. The other thing that she was aware of was the destructive nature of Lex and Clark, it was clearly running a similar course to that of Lena and Kara. She knew the collateral damage of Kara and Clark in this case Lex did seem to be the main reciprocation of many peoples collateral damage. She wanted clarity, as she had been considered an inconsistent variable herself.

“So you blame Superman for the inconsistencies in your life?”

Lex laughed mirthlessly and looked at Alex, she hit a button which pulled up a multitude of graphs, all connected to people he saved and timings who were missed, if she was clever she could see how the numbers correspond to the ones she recited.

“He is an inconsistency in its truest form, with the exception of Lois and the daily planet which makes sense, there is no pattern to who he chooses or why. He has interfered with my life but that isn’t the issue here”

Lex moved to the counter both hands now tapping away trying to maintain focus. Her mind filled with images each one corresponding to a number which she recited trying desperately to hold it together. Her mind was scrolling through the information that translated into the numbers, she didn't recite them as comfort it was more as an effort in understanding making sense of the incomprehensible.

“My second attempt at freedom from the government from this life using the suit called him back. This time I was not managing well, the thrust into the atmosphere shorted the suit as I knew it would, the AI was unable to submit to its own destruction and sent out a signal at the last moment. He flew in as I plummeted, he caught me and the AI kicked in. His soft touch as he saved my life hurt so much I lashed out the AI took over and the rest you can see on YouTube”

Lex remembered being trapped in the suit trying to fight him off as the suit sent out pulses. Defending itself against him as the fight continued, that meant that the super was fighting the AI with the ability to make Kryptonite, she couldn't break it off even if she had wanted to. Him clapping by her ears and reflecting beams into her eyes, she had lost control of everything in her pain. Her tapping became more insistent and harder on the desk.

“That landed me in the hands of Lane, with no control and no Lena. I refused to work and speak after the tornado incident, my mother wasn’t there so his treatments began in my mother’s absence, three days of ECT blockers and god knows what else he pumped into me. Soon it wasn't my refusal to speak running things I was once again unable to. I became locked into my mind and unable to move”

Alex understood or thought she did, it wasn’t hard to see why Lex had a issue with understanding, Clark made choices every day without any real information, the only things that he did chose with definity was his friends and family, she knew that and suspected that Lex would have made a connection too, but did not seem to go after them. Kara made choices too but there were people helping her, even before she started to work at the DEO she had Winn and James, she always had people looking for where she was best places, and she did what she could outside of that too.

“Superman works alone and responds to what he sees; he doesn't necessarily know all the other things going on, Kara has had help or she may be just as inconsistent, having a similar chart to this one. I understand that his choices have caused you difficulties.”

She thought about the fight, did Clark know it was Lex in the suit? Did he know that these things hurt her? Lex said that Clark had known them, did he use them to disable her? Did he think that pain was the best way? He was different to Kara but they both often looked for the quick fix. She thought about the other statements about Lane, she didn't much like him either, and Lillian being there or not had devised this treatment, it must have been terrifying. However she needed to understand the information and she wanted a little more clarity.

“I am sorry that you have had to go through this Lex, but sometimes accidents happen, making the choice that he thought was best having caused you pain. The other thing is a misunderstanding like that could happen with us, I could again do something that hurt you, like when I took your hand, we need to plan for this, we need to be sure that misunderstandings don't lead to the same kind of difficulties, is Lena the best option?”

“It’s not just the choices it’s how he removes choices, people who have chosen to die are saved and good people die at the same time? It’s not a series of mistakes it was, more than that, I will try to explain, as for any issues yes calling Lena is my best hope”

Alex had never really thought about her own position on suicide, she had been in low places in her life and once could assume that her drinking had been as self destructive as putting a gun to her head but she was not actively attempting it. She didn't know how low someone would need to be to try, so she looked at Lex, her face portraying the pain that the story had reflected in her.

Lex would not share what happened to her while she was locked inside, that was not needed and was not something she wanted to relive. Her heart was already racing the images threatening to overwhelm her. She could feel the need to curl in on herself to retreat, pulling at every part of her, a tear slowly made its way down her cheek the slow torturous movement taking down her skin. Trying to breath and focus she wiped the offending tear from her cheek and looked at Alex, her soft expression almost of pity, she closed her eyes and recited over and over.

“He chose to save me over and over when I didn’t want it, he chose to hurt me in ways only he knew about, claps, lights, the touch, he did these things with no reason, and continues to save people and interfere where he chooses, he plays god and every time he has with me, worse has happened than I thought possible, he was my best friend, you have never professed to like me; quite the opposite although, when you realized you caused me pain you avoided it, he used it against me that is why you're not the same”

Alex could see that there was so much going on inside Lex again, that she couldn't control, she didn't need her to continue it, to feel worse she just wanted her to be ok, she thought about what she could do, she needed Lex to come back to herself.

“I understand better now, everything is clear, I will not use your triggers against you Lex, it's ok you don't need to answer any more.”

Lex's legs gave out and she slumped to the floor, no longer speaking, just muttering.

“14372, accidents per day, 6 saves, 275736, deaths per month, 100-1000 saves, 47264 global incidents a Year, 4-6 attended, why them? Why those people? Why me?”

Alex saw the tear that fell down her face, the way that she wiped it away, she thought about the way it felt and thought that crying was less embarrassing and more painful, that was why she was wiping it away. It had nothing to do with Alex witnessing it.

“If I ever needed to stop you I promise I would do it myself, I would do it with pressure and purpose I would not hurt you.”

Lex continued to repeat the numbers trying frantically to stop the way her brain was trying to collapse in on itself. She pulled all her limbs in and made herself smaller and smaller until she was wrapped around herself tightly.

She tried to mimic the way Lena would hold her, ground her within herself so that she could stay present the words falling from her lips faster and looked at Alex with her small smile, she was trying to be nice somehow? She promised not to hurt Lex on purpose but would that change if Lex was out of control.

“I need.. I need to ....”

Lex tried to force the words out to reconnect with Alex with the world, she gritted her teeth and closed her eyes holding herself tighter. You can control it Lexi, come on you can do it! Lena’s voice in her mind made her make her eyes pop.

“I need to calm down, talking about him unsettles me”

Alex could see the struggle in Lex, she was worse than Friday, she was collapsing in on herself, she was unable to converse, adequately, she was trying to stay focused, Alex could see the way that Lex was holding herself and thought about the early days with Kara. when things were too much and she needed to be grounded, Alex would hold her, talk to her, keep her grounded until she calmed down. She knew the touch would have to be tight, with purpose, she was not sure that Lex would want her to be held by her? Should she call Lena? She had no idea where she was how long it would take Lena to get here. If she was autistic or had Asperger's touch wasn't welcome, something Alex already knew. She was torn but decided to try. She moved to the floor and positioned herself behind Lex, wrapping her arms and legs around her as tight as possible. Holding her and whispering in her ear ensuring no soft brushing of her lips close to her ears. She didn't want to make it worse.

"It's okay. You're okay, It's just us here. Just you and me. No one is going to hurt you."


	35. extraordinary precautions

Lex’s Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 10:00………

Lex was trying hard to return to herself, this was dangerous in so many ways, the thoughts of being locked in again and what could happen, why had she done this to herself? Why was she letting Alex in? She had to admit to herself in that moment it was because as Lena had accurately deduced she liked her. She would never return any kind thoughts Lex would have towards her she knew that from past experience. She was finding it harder to catch Lena’s voice in Her mind and felt herself slipping away, maybe it was better this way? Then she felt the arms wrapped around her, how long had she been stuck like this? Had Alex lived up to her flimsy agreement and called Lena?

“Lena Bean?”

Her voice was small and barely audible when another cut in, "It's okay. You're okay," Alex said softly, praying her instincts were right. "It's just us here. Just you and me. No one is going to hurt you." The voice was soft and the arms tight she had stiffened a little before the pressure became firm. The voice belonged to Alex, Alex Danvers was comforting her, she hadn’t expected that, every bit the inconsistent variable. She moved to grip the woman holding her tightly encouraging more pressure. Clinging to Alex as a life line back to herself. After some time she could feel her body, her mind had quietened and she could breathe again. She started to notice things, Alexa strong arms, her scent, the softness of the skin her forehead was pressed against. Alex has pulled her back.

“Thank you Alex, I was not expecting you to do that, how did you know it was what was needed?”

Alex noted how fragile Lex sounded in that moment, the way she was clinging to her, she was doing her best to keep her own pressure constant and firm, with purpose as Lex had stated. She wondered if this would be allowed, with what Lex had told her about her amorous activities it sound unlikely that there would be an option for cuddles after but that was something that Alex herself enjoyed. Although this wasn't that kind of situation, Alex couldn't help but think how nice it felt to have Lex in her arms. She didn't want to be thinking about it, it would only lead to her eventually being disappointed, she knew that Lex couldn't feel things for her. She smiled at the question and thought for a moment.

“Well there are many things that I have learned by having Kara as a sister, she would have nightmares, become anxious and overwhelmed. The only way to calm her down was me to hold her, sometimes it would be all night, but it needed to be tight and consistent.”

She paused for a moment and she had thoughts and ideas about what was considered wrong with Lex, and she wasn't sure that she would express it, but considering the level of trust that she had just placed in Alex, she felt that she would reciprocate. After all, they were going to work together continuing to build trust and not hide things, especially things that are hypothesized about Lex herself.

“There have been several shows that I have watched, too, Greys anatomy, The Big bang theory and Atypical. They all contained characters with Asperger's syndrome, the things you correctly identified as things I have noted about you would fit into that, they had commonalities when in distress and that was the need for a consistent tight hold, being contained with purpose, I thought that it was worth a try, by the time that I thought Lena needed to be called I was concerned and wanted to at least hold you until she got here I was not sure how long it would take as I don't know where I am. Holding you in this way seemed to help, so I thought I would give you a little time to adjust to the abnormality that I create in you. Which would be enough I hoped.”

Lex continued to hold Alex as she listened to her, she flinched a little. Alex had worked out that she had Asperger's not that it was a great surprise. It was one of the things that was a secret but she guessed it wasn’t any more. She didn't feel concerned about it, she analyzed it and realized that sharing with Alex didn't feel uncomfortable in any way, neither did the way she was holding her, she was not accustomed to being held like this, Lena would to calm her but would retreat as soon as it was appropriate, human contact was not something that she had in any great quantity. She realized that she had just been holding Alex in place as much as Alex was holding her, she found the embrace pleasing.

“Well maybe I should write a letter the the creators outlining the fantastic job they are doing at portraying the condition and how to help people”

There was a small smile on her lips, she found that sitting in Alex’s arms was very comforting, she didn’t know why but Alex had an effect on her that she was increasingly enjoying. As the hold continued the feeling intensified, her heart rate increased, her body started to respond in ways that were more sexual in nature, but that was inappropriate, not only was this a working relationship, with the connection of Lena and Kara there would be no conceivable way that one night would be able to happen. A thought entered her mind which she was not in the position to contemplate, she would not be satisfied with one night with Alex.

“I wouldn’t ask you to to continue Alex, as much as it is calming and helping, I am sure that doing this is less than pleasant for you”

As much as Lex was still not a one hundred percent she felt stable enough to continue, provided Alex was done with talking and questions about him. Lex knew that the increased feeling towards Alex was getting more and more dangerous for her, the kindness shown was probably no more than she would do for anyone, Lex couldn’t and wouldn’t read into it, she already knew she couldn’t predict Alex.

“We can continue to work, and I am sure you don’t want to be holding me longer than necessary.”

Alex listened to her, she was somewhat pleased that Lex was unable to correctly predict her reactions and her thoughts. They were definitely not in line with Lex’s assessment in this case, she had been drifting to thoughts of a romantic nature, to thinking about cuddling after, how lovely it would be to be able to hold Lex after making love, showing her that she didn't need to run, that she didn't need to feel she was not worthy, that she could be loved and held. She knew this wasn't possible, that Lex couldn't Love her, that she probably couldn't accept love from her, something that she knew she was feeling for her. It may have been selfish but Alex wasn't ready to leave the embrace, the feeling connected with it, or the possibilities that her mind was creating. She was concerned by Lex’s continued belief that she was in some way not worthy, or that Alex didn't like or want to touch her, that she was somehow repulsed by her.

“Well I am perfectly comfortable Lex, the Danvers family are quite tactile, I mean you have met Kara, we are all huggers Lex, it would have felt more uncomfortable for me not to have held you, it is a natural instinct and I enjoy it, holding people, hugging them, it is nice, if you want me to let go I will. I am not in any way repulsed or repelled by you Lex, holding you close is not in any way unpleasant. I do not view you as a villain, and don't know why you insist on holding that belief”

Her interesting internal reaction was now resounding in her mind, she didn't want her to let go. Lex looked at the woman still holding her, she couldn’t really understand why she felt safe with her, Alex was a contradiction, unstable in her choices yet something about being wrapped in her arms was comforting. It made her feel cared for in an unexpected way. She listened to her talk about being a hugger, this was a somewhat foreign concept to Lex. Then her assertion that she wasn’t repelled by her, the small smile of the red head caused one to blossom on Lex’s face also. She liked the thought that there could be someone in all the multiverse other than Lena that could like her.

“Well, you didn’t want to be close to me so you took a while to quit, then you seemed at odd as to if you wanted to beat me into oblivion or have a conversation, then you invited me out as subterfuge, you took a job to keep an eye on me and made no qualms about taking me down if needed. But in true fashion of your unpredictable nature, you apologize when you hurt me, you stayed for dinner, you agreed to work with me to ensure that Lane is no longer a threat, help me with my investigation into kryptonite, pulled me closer and held me when I needed it.”

Alex had made a move to stand up maintaining contact with her and holding her, although not as close as before. She smiled as the woman stood pulling herself to her feet. She looked at her and smiled brightly. All was true and she wondered how little she had made of it in that summary, should alarm bells not be ringing. Lex drifted a little closer and placed her hand on Alex’s arm, she looked into her eyes and a soft hesitant smile formed on her lips. She was finding it easier to be herself, to be willingly open and it would appear affectionate.

“Only Lena has ever held me Alex, oh, I like you too, as I said as dangerous as you could be for me, I have found I care”

Alex couldn't deny that this was accurate and factual although it was not representative of her feelings towards Lex. she was happy that Lex had realized that the mistake was something that she wouldn't want to make again and in that way she is different, maybe the idea that even with her inconsistencies she was not going to end up like Clark. Alex watched as she stepped closer into her personal space and placed her hand on her arm, the eye contact and the soft smile was intoxicating, she was beautiful and somewhat captivating. Alex struggled to swallow as the words registered with her, a lot of emotions running at the same time, sadness that none showed her affection, gratitude that Lena had. Concern that Lex still felt Alex was dangerous, she had no desire to hurt her. She wanted nothing more than to help her understand that. The thought that Lex cared about her filled her with a warm feeling, she was happy that she cared that she liked her even if it wasn't exactly the way that Alex herself would have liked. Her mind getting away with her, she thought it best to focus on the job again.

“Well that is not the case anymore I assure you, also, I like you too, now how about you show me what you have been working on in this amazing Lab, I mean it is higher speck than anything that I have seen before. So you have made different forms, somehow? As much as the bio-lock is impressive I am hoping there are more safeguards in storage.”

Lex nodded and tilted her head toward the screens and turned towards it. She hit some buttons and the screens lit up with formulas for green and red kryptonite. She was more than happy to discuss her passion making for easy flow. She would explain the how and what, before showing her, it was Lex’s chance to talk to someone about her work and she would enjoy it.

“These were the first two forms of kryptonite I came across now when you look at them like this they are like any other formula, but when you change them you can see they are at different ends of a sequence. However too far apart to ascertain what that might be. When the Daxamites invaded I added the silver, which you can see is near the red, and then with the world killers I added black. black gave more parts of the sequence close to the green. As a person that loves patterns I extrapolated the sequence and found this”

The screen changes showing a multitude of types, it spanned a spectrum from red to green and beyond in both areas, she smiled at the agent. Wondering if she understood what she had done, how many she could make and what the spectrum meant. There were small divider marks between groups of similar distinction vibrational oscillation and wavelengths for example, there seemed to be a natural progression with the sequences separating the groups into potential samples, the red grouping and the green grouping pointing to different effects. She looked at Alex and could see that there was a Level of confusion on her face, patterns and equations not as commonplace to others.

“Maybe if I do this”

She changed the view and the forms were in the form of the periodic table only instead of 118 there were close to 200. She called up the periodic table, the 118 known and the others with the sequence and formula in the boxes.

“I was able to make quite a number of them although there are some that I couldn’t because the elements needed haven’t been discovered”

Lex had thought about setting out to discover them to earth the missing secrets but she was already so focused on the kryptonite that it was a thought filed for a later date. 

“As with the table there seems to be a distinct difference in functionality of the samples, instead of gasses metals they respond to mental, emotional, cellular and physical alterations, much is still hypothesis, how ever as you found using the green to counter the red, they have a similar correlation, the opposite factors counteracting the one in the diametrically opposed position”

Alex could follow some of what was being said, she had seen the formulas of red and green, and the black too, she didn't know any of the silver had been collected from the Daxamites, she was following up to the point that there were hundreds of formulas on the screen, her mind was assaulted by so many different equations she couldn't even pinpoint the once she knew in the line. Lex looked at her expectantly and all she could do was stare back blankly, she wasn't stupid, she knew that but this was way beyond her. When she changed the layout Alex recognized the periodic table but it was bigger, it had many more options. Her mind was reeling from the information and she needed to take a moment.

“Wahoo ok, you need to just um, wow stop a moment.”

Alex took a moment to breath and collect her thoughts, run through what she had and had not understood, it was a lot to take in, there were more elements than had been discovered, and Lex had worked out what their formulas were and there were as many options with Kryptonite. She was understanding the most very basic of the information but there was so much she didn't understand Lex’s mind was brilliant and complex and clearly she looked at this like some kind of join the dots. Whereas to Alex it was like trying to decrypt the ancient information from the mains.

“Ok Sheldon, Penny here is lost, you need to hold up and retrace because I am going to need a little extra time to understand this.”

Lex turned to look at Alex tilting her head to the side a little, she could see the twinkle in her eye but also the confusion on her face. She wasn’t sure who Sheldon was or Penny but she could see that she was once again dumbing herself down. Alex had the capacity and the intelligence for this, but maybe she was going too fast? She looked up as Alex spoke a final time.

“Maybe if you do a U-Turn on pine and hit the interstate we can get back on the same path?”

Lex laughed a little and placed her hand on Alex’s shoulder, she found the woman more interesting day by day. There was something about her easy to understand jokes and casual way of chatting that put her in a more social mood. It was clear that her suggestion was that she needed Lex to slow down that the locations were fictional and that she was just trying to explain that she needed a moment to understand.

“Alex, Changing direction and doing Illegal U-Turns is ill advised at best, you're not slow or in any way unable to understand. However I may have given a little much to digest in one go. Kryptonite is a mineral in and of itself, the different types that have naturally found their way to earth have a pattern and a sequence to them, much like the elements on the periodic table, in fact the elements themselves are connected to the forms of kryptonite constituent parts.”

Lex smiled and showed how the make up of the kryptonite contained one element per style, the patterns pointed to many different types, overlapping the kryptonite with the elements.

“The pattern meant I could extrapolate the types and that then pointed to missing elements on the table, hypothetically speaking, they have different functions and balance each other” 

She looked at Alex looking for understanding, looking at the acknowledgment. Alex was definitely competent and would understand how the elements could cancel each other out Acidic and Alkaline can create neutrality and such. It was the same with the Kryptonite.

“Gold strips her of power, the diametrically opposed color blue increases it, but this dark blue here, would make her completely invincible the only way to counter would be gold.”

Alex couldn't believe that Lex had managed to extrapolate so many different types of Kryptonite, not to mention that she had uncovered the structure of so many unknown elements that have yet to be discovered, her head was literally spinning. The woman standing before her was even more brilliant than she was aware of. Alex couldn't deny that this would make her possibly the most dangerous woman on the planet, although there was a battle in her mind over this thought. Part of her risk assessing and wondering if this level of intelligence in the wrong hands could be completely devastating. The other part of her reveling in the brilliance of her, the stimulation to her own thoughts and the belief that Lex herself was not in any way going to hurt her.

Lex had on many occasions produced things that were incredibly dangerous, although her intention was not to do so, if she ever truly put effort into nefarious plans she would be almost unstoppable, however Alex completely believed that she was indeed neutral, although Alex felt there was a lean in the positive. She was sure that this was her own positive feelings towards Lex herself. She had told her that she was not trying to be a savior. She looked up at the woman and took a breath, a moment to collect her thoughts.

“Ok so, I understand what you are saying Lex, but I fear that it is a shallow understanding, as much as I have biochemical understanding and genetic understanding but this is, this is incredibly complex, I know that you think that I am the person that can help here because of my qualifications and understanding of Kryptonian and other alien DNA but, compared to what you have here, I am well out of my depth. Its like I am kindergarten and you are well, you are mocking professors at MIT”

Lex looked at Alex and nodded, she thought of Alex as intelligent enough to follow this she didn’t need her to be Lex, that wasn’t what she was here for, she needed her to be Alex, to think about the figure out the consequences the possible problems, Lex could make things but should she was always the question she couldn’t answer.

“Alex you are smart but in a different way in a way, one which I am not, that is the point, I can extrapolate the possibilities of the kryptonite indefinitely alone, but I can’t weigh up the moral implications. I can not look at the ways that others may twist things that I make or know what of my inventions would be of interest, the AI and the suit individually were for areas that were not connected that were not harmful, however there was a intersecting factor that I didn't consider but it was manipulated and enforced by the government. You see I consider my inventions in isolation, as with humans I don't look at interconnections.”

She smiled and turned back pointing. At the different items that she was talking about, she wanted to show the groupings but also point out that she trusted Alex and understood that there are positives from the experiments for her sister too, that there could be benefit.

“Yes this one will give her a boost, it will give her an advantage over Lane, whatever he has will be a substandard version of something that I created. This cluster will effect her mind, emotions, inhibitions, control her, they are dangerous as the effects can’t be tested, you remember I said that then come in different sections well they have a different vibration and don’t affect physically 

She turned to Alex and smiled. Hoping that she was understanding that she had been careful in her assessments and that she was not hiding anything.

“This bunch are stored very safely indeed they are unknown variables and you know how fond I am of them”

Alex wondered if that was a joke? If that was another declaration of her fondness for her, she wished she could control her thoughts and the way that Lex’s words encouraged her to think about something more. She couldn't help the building feelings towards Lex and she knew that there was no hope that Lex would be able to feel those things towards her. Although that did sound like an inside joke, the kind you have with people that are meaningful to you, someone you care for normally quite deeply.

“Do we have an inside joke now? That did seem a little sarcastic in nature?”

Alex noticed that Lex had started to move to the door and followed, she wondered if the ones that she was unclear of that she was containing more stringently, she viewed as dangerous and that was why she wanted to test them against Kara’s blood and hair, that made sense, the other ones that were unknown, Kara was not likely to want to experiment even if as Lex said she could, would be able to remove the effect.

“I guess I have no need to remind you that you are a genius. So that's what you want the samples for to try and work out the effects on the blood and hair so you can extrapolate the effects on the whole? What if it doesn't have an effect on her physically but it changes her personality? I wouldn't be ok with any experiment where she could be effected”

“Well yes I guess you could look at it that way, much like I have a name for Lena, a classification for you as an inconsistent variable could be considered a term of endearment. Which is often what an inside joke is, is it not?”

Lex listened as Alex spoke she was more than aware of the way people hid what they really thought or felt, sometimes harder for her but using micro gestures she could normally speak the inconsistencies. Sarcasm although it has a cadence all of its own a pattern that was understandable and structured, it was often missed on first analysis however when pointed out she could normally see it.

“I have had a lot of training and practice at spotting deception, the human body leaks terribly the signs and gestures of an untrue emotion or word, the only thing is they have to be actively lying, if they are not the or they believe what they are saying then I can’t see it. Sarcasm although beautifully constructed is not necessarily a lie, and that means that I can miss it along with other humor.”

She arrived at the door and paused signaling for Alex to stop. This was the door to take them into the containment area and it had the most security, and the additional thanks to Lena’s observations and recommendations. She was hoping that this would in some way put Alex’s mind at rest.

Alex looked at her and smiled, softly she understood from Kara how frustrating it can be when everyone else is in on the joke and you are unable to see it she was sure that Lex would feel even more awkward than Kara as people expect with her level of intelligence and the charm that she would be able to understand and convey humor in all its forms. She ran her hand through her hair before speaking.

“I would be happy to help you recognize and understand it better, I often communicate with sarcasm and humor, it will be a challenge for us.”

“I would be happy to gain further insight it may help, this door leads to the containment room, it has a biometric lock and a passcode, it’s also made of lead lined Nth Metal, as is the entire structure”

Alex couldn't help but be impressed by the use of such a strong metal for the door and room, and lining it with lead would ensure that any radiation from the kryptonite wasn't able to leak into the surrounding area, or create a impact should Kara be flying or walking around in the general vicinity, in addition she figured that it would stop the samples cancelling each other out. She looked at Lex and tilted her head.

“Biometric like down stairs? The one that scanned me, does that mean that I would be able to open it? Is it familial DNA or specific? Could Lena walk in here for example?”

She was wondering just how sophisticated this lock was, would it be possible to gain access with just the Luthor DNA would it be specific to an individual. She was definitely making this place hard to just wander into, and that was a definite plus for Alex, Lex really was being careful with this, she couldn't help but wonder if this was in someway for Alex’s benefit after she had expressed concern, but that would be attributing a level of affection and care that Lex said she didn't possess.

“Well Alex it is a multi faceted reader, there is DNA scan, and there is a vitals read, and a bioelectrical read, that means that I would have to be me, reasonably calm, and conscious for it to read as me, there is then the code to input which is matched for accuracy, cadence and speech modulation. Each person that is given access to the lab would have to be scanned at the first port, and then give a code at the voice activation port, and then both would be calibrated at the far side of the lab, Lena has access yes”

She smiled briefly as she put up her hand and spoke 01001100 01100101 01111000 00100000 01001100 01110101 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110010. There was a small chuckle to herself as she wondered if Alex understood binary. The door opened and there was a large lead room with lasers all over it.

“If you would be so kind as to offer a strand of hair Alex I will show you the second precaution but please stay outside the room.”

Alex listened, that was a lot of numbers, she remembered learning binary a long time ago but had no idea what that would spell out, there was no way that she would be able to remember a code of that length, the only person that could replicate that was Brainy, maybe Lena. It was an impressive security feature, as the door finally opened Alex could see inside the room. It was mostly metal, there were a number of desks and fridges and other scientific equipment, however the overwhelming amount of red beams in there were almost too bright to look at. She wondered what kind of precautions that triggered.

“Well that is an impressive code Lex, and a lot of beams, what do they trigger?”

As much as it was impressive she couldn't help but wonder what those beams did, were they a beam that caused the room to shut? To set off an alarm? Were they dangerous in general? She was impressed so far with everything Lex had done, there was also the concern that if they wanted to get in here and neutralize it there was no way any one person could manage this. She wasn't sure that the DEO team would even get in here. She was confused by the request for a strand of hair, but moved her hand to the longer side and plucked a strand of hair offering out to Lex.

“Ok here you are”

Lex took the hair and held it towards the lasers as she did the hair was cut. She smiled at Alex and Curled her fist around the hair stepping into the room but nothing happened. She opened her hand and the beams disintegrated the hair.

“The beams target anything that has DNA that isn’t stored, the box on the far wall controls it so only people who have DNA in the system can turn it off. It essentially decompiles the unrecognized DNA on the molecular level leaving behind no trace.”

She proceeded to the end of the room and placed her hand on the panel giving instruction for stored DNA to be loaded to the beams. This was the only place in the lab where the DNA could be added to the system she had thought that this was a little excessive but the planning and implementation of this level of security had meant that Lena was comfortable, she had been very anxious about there being this amount of kryptonite in the city.

“It’s safe now for you, different panels have different abilities, this one is the only that can add DNA, so as you can see someone new would not be able to get here without first having gotten past all the security, and no-one can be added without the full security clearance. However the level of light bothers me so I am going to turn them off”

Alex was looking at the interconnecting lasers and could only see the scene from resident evil turning into diced meat, she was not overly comfortable with the idea of being decompiled. If she was still in the mid set that Lex was trying to kill her this would be a good way, there would be no evidence left. She didn't believe that this was Lex’s intention but was still nervous, she stepped over the threshold with her eyes closed as she spoke.

“I assume that there had never been a malfunction or an incorrect reading that has caused a person to turn into some kind of diced meat byproduct?”

Lex punched in the code as she chuckled and the beams retracted then she moved over to the computer and called up the storage, the floor opened and the containment came up multiple led chambers each with a lock on them.

“The final safety is that if it is not authorized and someone has managed to get this far which is pretty much impossible; is if I don’t solve the riddle the internal lead will open, the kryptonite cancels each other out and they all become inert except the ones that I can’t make the reverse of, those well they have been treated more securely than this.”

Alex slowly opened her eyes to reveal that she was in the lab the lasers were off and she was in one piece she had heard the small chuckle and realized that she probably looked rather silly. She was after all the former DEO director. She just couldn't get that image out of her mind, but hey she was in one piece.

Lex laughed she hadn’t seen the fearless woman look intimidated or fearful in any of their previous meetings but right now she was. She wondered how often Alex did that, pushed down that vulnerability and concern and did things anyway. She looked at her and raised her brow, wondering what caused it.

“I am sure that the system is flawless Lex, but that many Lasers in that configuration made me wonder if the red queen was going to turn me into chunks of meat, I mean the grid changed until it killed them all in Resident evil, just a visual connection I guess.”

Lex searched through her mind for a second and then realized what Alex was talking about, the Zombie movie, from the game, she shook her head, this was the real world not science fiction, and she could guarantee that her work was no longer theoretical and it was not dramatized. The side of her mouth lifted as she raised her brow looking at Alex.

“You live in a world with aliens, is that not enough science fiction for you Alex? I mean zombies and mutations”

She shook her head and looked to Alex where she was asking about the samples. She nodded and quickly dispatched the riddle before walking over to the containers.

“To answer you no, nothing I have ever made has malfunctioned unless I wanted it too, the grid is harmless to people who have been programmed in. Ok so never take two adjoining samples they will neutralize themselves.”

Alex smiled and looked at her remembering that Lex had told her that the tornado malfunction was by design and she couldn't help but feel affection towards Lex and how she had looked out for Kara, this setup was also going to keep her safe. She could see just how much she had done to ensure that this was safe and secure and then her mind went to the other statement about human effects.

“So this is all stored safe, but some of it affects humans. How do I know if something is going to affect me? I would like to know more about the ones that can affect us”

A buzzer sounded and Lex looked at a monitor on the wall, she shook her head with a small grin.

“Soon Alex, but it is something that will have to wait, it appears that Lena anticipated that I would forget Lunch it looks like she has sent some.”

She pressed a few buttons and the samples disappeared back into the floor and she guided Alex out.


	36. Kara’s shift

Lena’s office (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 13:00………

Lena knew that today was the day that Alex would be going to the Lab, she was nervous for Lexi, it wasn't because of the security, she already had the most amazing security. Then with Lena looking at it from a protection of Kara view, she had a few additional thoughts and Lexi had created a number of additional measures that were truly unprecedented. It was the effect that she had noticed Alex had on her, she created an instability in her although she was managing to stabilize herself a little more each time. Lena was not sure if it was the obvious attraction that she had to Alex. She had not seen this reaction in Lexi before, she was growing fond of her, she wondered if she was falling in love with her, or Lexi’s version of it. Lena had thought about Lexi’s capacity for love many times, she wanted Lexi to be happy, she wanted her to have all the things that she had finally found for herself. She knew better than to try and suggest these things to her, to encourage her to think of these things. For all her brilliance Lexi had an absolute line in her mind that stopped her contemplating relationships.

Lena leaned back in her chair and looked to her desk, she now had a picture of her and Kara and a picture of her and Lexi, she had added them to her desk in the last week, previously she had not wanted personal things on her desk, everything had been tainted, the upbringing, the incident with Lexi the thought that she was dead. Then there were the lies and the difficulties that happened with Kara and Alex, leading to her destroying the only personal photo that she had in her office, or her home. She was so happy that things had moved forward that they had changed and that they were now more than they had been before. She wanted the same thing for Lexi. She looked at the picture and they were smiling, she could see the love that was between them and the way that she had the ability to love even if she didn't believe she did. She may feel the emotion differently but there was direct correlations in regards to her emotional responses and the actions that happened because of them and the way Lex reacted were the same, she missed people, she was upset when she lost contact, and she had been profoundly affected by people close to her that had hurt her or had changed dramatically.

She may not feel love, but she expressed it many times to Lena, she demonstrated it, and she was clearly developing sensations towards Alex that were in the same area, not the way she loved her, but the level of interest, the irrational desire to be around her even though she knew it wasn't the sensible option, engaging in discussions that she wouldn't normally, her bodily reactions, were all pointing towards the start of a deep attraction. She had not spoken to her much about sexuality, she knew that Lexi was interested in women but they had not talked about relationships as such. There had been many rumors about Lexi being somewhat of a playgirl, working her way through many people and having many amorous interactions. However there had been no obvious dates, or if there was never a second one. She could see how important Alex had already become; she wondered how Alex was feeling about Lexi. She was a little worried about talking to Kara about it, after all there was an issue between Lexi and Superman. However maybe it would be something they could talk about, after all she had suggested that Alex seemed to like Lexi. She had sent food to Lexi’s lab for the both of them and was expecting Kara shortly for lunch. She wondered if she was as nervous about them as she was.

Noonan's (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 13:00………

Waiting in line Kara’s thoughts flitted between excitement and nervousness, resulting in a rather energetic set of movements in her body, she was fidgeting and this was causing a number of issues, she had already bumped a few people and knocked a stand over, she was starting to display a unusual level of clumsiness. She had finally managed to order and was now trying to reduce her movements while waiting for the food and coffee. Seeing Lena for lunch was something she was really looking forward to, they had not spent much time together since the Gala, mainly working in the lab and the occasional dinner, but she had been helping Lex a lot. She found it difficult to reconcile the stories from Kal and the images that Lena had described in regards to her. She was finding it difficult to understand that one person could generate such division in her. There was part of her that witnessed Lena and Lex, where she felt a commonality, a level of empathy and understanding based on a shared experience. She understood the difficulties that Lex experienced throughout her life, and couldn't help wonder what other things that caused her to react in ways that others saw as aggressive or destructive.

She picked up the order and started to walk towards Luthor corp, she could have been there in a matter of moments if she had flown but she needed time to think, the look on Lena’s face when she had arrived and Lex was unconscious. Lena was scared for her, she had asked Kara not to hurt her, that had caused Kara’s heart to be heavy, she wanted to avoid that look at all costs. She never wanted to hurt Lena again and it was obvious that any action against Lex would do so. The thought that Lena believed even for a moment that she would do something like that was hard for her but she understood the reaction, after all she had the same reaction to Lex in response to Alex. She had two people that she cared about deeply that seemed to be very connected to Lex. Lena made sense, she was her sister, the person that she felt closest too and had made her feel at home. It was much like the relationship she had with Alex, she had been the one to give her her first sense of belonging and their relationship was strong, as strong as the one with Lena and Lex.

Alex was the cause of the anxiety she had been feeling, there was a significant amount of information connected to Lex and the weapons she had built, not to mention everything that Kal had said, it made her dangerous, and then the addition of kryptonite, and not just one kind multiple, and the Lab that is hidden, Alex not being able to be tracked or knowing where she is. If Lex was planning something Alex was in a very dangerous position. Alex and Lena had both assured her that there was nothing to worry about over and over, Alex had fiercely defended her. She was startled by the veracity in which Alex had defended her, in addition she had admitted that there were feelings connected with her. She knew that Alex was fully capable of looking after herself and protecting others, even if they were mostly invulnerable and didn't need it. The concern was more about the amount that Alex put up with for love, or when she was feeling strong emotional connections to someone. Her love for Maggie had led her down a very destructive path, but she could only see that Maggie loved her and wanted to be with her, and she felt the same. From what she understands of Lex there is a lack of emotion, could she even return Alex’s affection, would that make any difference to Alex’s reaction based on her love for Lex.

She was with her now, she would have been in the lab for a number of hours and there was no way to communicate with her, if there was something wrong Kara would not be able to help her. She couldn't help but wonder about what Lex’s intentions were and more about what her intentions were towards Alex, Lena had hinted at the possibility that Lex liked her, what did that look like with someone like Lex, what did it mean. She rounded the corner and was only a few blocks from Luthor corp, she needed to get her thoughts together, and work out how to navigate this potential new dynamic. She wondered if Lena had any insight that would help put her mind at rest, and if it would be something that she would discuss. Lex had always been a bit of a difficult subject to her, the reunion with her sister that she had long thought dead had been difficult. Although she accepted her into her life and was very happy to have her back, she feared losing her and was upset by the distance created. Kara could see that she would do whatever she could to help her and keep her safe and well.

Kara couldn't help but think that for all their difference the Luthor sisters were much like her and Alex, but more than that she could see that Lena and Lex both had aspects of her and Alex. Lex for example showed similarities with her, the difficulties with human humor, and emotions at times. The issues with sensory overload, it was for a different reason but it was comparable, since she had known this, Kara had found empathy for Lex, something that she had not expected, since the time she was small Lex had been considered a monster. Less than human in some way, but this vulnerability seemed to make her seem different, something that they shared. Then there was Lex’s protection of Lena and the way that she took on Alex to ensure her safety, Alex has explained their conversation. That reminded her of Alex and the way she would protect her, the fondness for Lena and the desire to protect her gave her another commonality. The love of Lena, although the information said Lex didn't love, but she knew this wasn't right. The image of Lena and Lex making pancakes together had convinced her that Lex may not experience it the same but she did love. She arrived at Luthor corp and wanted to put this to one side to enjoy her Lunch with Lena.

She entered the building and gave security a wave before heading up to the elevators and heading up to Lena’s office. She stepped off and smiled at Jess behind her desk handing over a coffee. Jess had smiled brightly at her and she was clearly busy with something however she thanked her and suggested she go in as Lena was expecting her. She went to the door and knocked lightly before opening it a crack and looking through the gap. Lena looked deep in thought leaning back in her chair and appearing to be gazing into space. Whatever she was deep in thought about the knock had not pulled her from it. She was looking stunning today and Kara couldn't help but slip in and lean against the wall to take her in for a moment. She was wearing a black suit with a grey pin stripe in it and a red shirt, it looked soft and silky. Her hair was down cascading across her shoulders. She smiled as she observed her, she almost didn't want to pull her from her thoughts. Taking a step closer she spoke with a soft voice.

“You’re a million miles away can I tempt you back with lunch, coffee and the promise of a warm hug?”

Lena startled slightly at the unexpected communication and turned to look at the approaching blonde, her lips instantly drew into a broad smile as she pushed up from the chair and moved towards Kara. the combination of the tight jeans and the sleeveless shirt that Kara was wearing causing her to take in the form of her girlfriend appreciatively. Once in close enough proximity to her she reached out and pulled her in for a hug, moving back only slightly to place her hand on Kara's face and leaning in for a soft and slow kiss. She enjoyed the symbiotic ministration of their lips as they continued the slow progress of the kiss, feeling content not to deepen it but just enjoy the sensuality of the moment. She finally pulled back with a small smirk raising her brow a little.

“The price for return now includes a kiss, especially when they are that perfect.”

Kara reciprocated the kiss and couldn't help feel the swell of emotion that was present in her body. She loved the soft feeling of Lena’s lips against hers, the warmth of her body and the closeness needed for this kind of embrace. They had spent less time together than she would have liked but moments like these were perfect. It was a collection of moments that made this past week bearable, she could understand the need for her to help Lex and make sure that her treatment was effective. It was hard for her however especially since the night of the gala for her to not be with her, she didn't need physical expression in terms of sex but she did miss the sensual intimacy of touches and kisses, they had been working hard but made time for this intimacy. She blushed at the words from Lena although she couldn't disagree that the kiss was indeed perfect.

“Well now that I have your attention, I have brought lunch, coffee and as many kisses as you would like, I would like to know what you were thinking about though, you were very deep in thought.”

Lena ran her hand down Kara's arm and interlocked her fingers within Kara’s smiling softly and moved to lead her over to the couch, she had been thinking about talking to Kara about the brewing relationship between Alex and and Lexi, and talking about it with Kara. Her thoughts had not solidified exactly she wanted to talk but not have affected her and Kara’s relationship. She settled onto the couch and looked over to Kara, slipping off her shoes and slipping her feet under herself and leaning on the back of the couch. She leaned her elbow and rested her head on her hand, holding Kara's hand with her other and softly rubbing her thumb over her knuckles.

“I have been a little distracted today, Alex and Lexi are in the lab and I am concerned about how that is going, I worry that Alex is becoming important to her but at the same time she triggers Lexi, when they have talked before it has led to her becoming unstable to some degree. Although the first two times Lexi managed to calm herself the third time I almost lost her, I wasn't ready to test my treatment but I had no choice. My concern is the more Alex means to her the more that she will be able to affect her. Lexi has never had any kind of relationship, well since she was much younger and the effects of that were devastating. I don't know how Alex will react to affection from Lex, it isn't the same as other people and well she may not be receptive.”

Lena thought about the interaction with Alex in the café, the way that Alex had been so anxious about the lack of communication, the way that she was unable to find her, and the way that she was looking at that time, looked like it was causing her the same kind of distress as it had been Lexi. The way Alex had smiled when she had said that Lexi was planning on contacting her was some kind of confirmation that she was at least fond of her.

“I had the impression that Alex may like her and you have suggested that she no longer thinks of her in a negative way, that she had defended her a little but that is far from a relationship or the ability to return affection, in whatever form that takes. I guess as much as I can see that there is an attraction Lexi doesn't see, and I don't know if Alex feels that way, Lex isn't a threat. I know it in my heart, but Alex is a threat to her.”

Kara listened to her, she was just as anxious about the meeting of the two older siblings as she was; she waited until Lena had finished gathering and expressing her thoughts, she realized that there was a level of irony, the current state of affairs she was concerned about were expressed with contradiction with Lena’s words. She was concerned that Alex would hurt Lex, that Lex’s affection for her would make her more dangerous, just as she was concerned about the reverse. A small chuckle emanated from her as she captured Lena’s emerald orbs.

“I have been having the same thoughts Lena, in reverse that Alex’s feelings towards Lex would blind her to the dangers, she had been in this position before where there was someone that she loved, and was harmful to her but she couldn't see it or protect herself from it. I believe in my heart as do you, that Alex is no threat to Lex, she has developed feelings for her and the way she has defended her I know that she is currently unable to see any danger. Although Alex believes that Lex could not have any feelings for her, I am not so sure that Lex doesn't feel emotion as such, she very much loves you, not that I can blame her.”

Lena was initially upset by the chuckle, she wondered if Kara was dismissing her concerns and then as she spoke she realized just how hopeless the older siblings were, they were both thinking the same things clearly, that the other wouldn't be interested, Lexi was finding it hard to process her own interest let alone any interest from Alex. she started laughing as she looked at Kara, she couldn't help it, people had said that her and Kara were oblivious but it seemed as though Lexi and Alex were even more so, she wondered how Kara would feel about a possible connection between their sisters?

“It looks as though our sisters have the same flaw as we do, the inability to recognize affection in the other appropriately, Lexi does love, this is true, she doesn't call it that, the same as she doesn't call anxiety that, although her body sensations and thoughts are very similar. If anything her emotions are stronger than regular humans it is her ability to recognize and understand them that is the problem. This can lead to high levels of frustration and confusion. I have noticed that the start of Lexi’s affection has become apparent in connection to Alex, she is asking questions about her and thinking about her, it's like her neural pathways are becoming accustomed to her presence and she is starting to miss her when she is not there. You think that Alex has feelings towards her, would she act on them?”

Kara had not expected the laugh but she was glad that her spontaneous laughter had not caused offence, she listened to her analysis of Lex and her emotions, it was as she suspected Lex did love, she did have feelings but at the same time there was an indication that her processing was different. The question about Alex gave her pause, she felt that she was genuinely curious about the possibility that Alex might act on her feelings, Kara wasn't sure if she wanted Alex to or if she was worried that Alex would. She contemplated both sides for a moment.

“I am not sure that she would, as Lex has been very specific in her lack of emotions for Alex, and her romantic or sexual needs, I think that Alex wouldn't attempt anything and would most likely assume that they would be unrequited anyway. Alex has not been very good at judging people's interest in the past, when she had been correct they have initially rebuffed her anyway. How would Lex react to it if she did? You said you were worried about Alex in terms of Lex’s stability, are you concerned any action from her would hurt Lex? Would that put Alex in danger?”

Lena listened although she understood the reason for the question, she wished that Kara’s first thought wasn't that Lexi would hurt Alex, she still had not managed to convey that Lexi wasn't evil that she was misunderstood and subject to the whims of her mother because of her need for treatments, that the government has taken her and subjected her to horrific things. She wasn't sure exactly how Lexi would react to Alex actively doing something to express interest but it would not be dangerous to Alex, she would likely swing emotionally. The likelihood would be that she would close down in panic or go completely manic, but neither of those things would hurt Alex. She didn't know how else to convey that Lex was not going to willingly hurt Alex across to Kara.

“No, Kara she wouldn't be in danger, Alex would put her in danger, she could become emotionally unstable, possibly shut down resulting in the need for treatment or manic, which will alert mother to there being a problem which could leave her in serious danger. However I can't be sure of that, I have little knowledge of Lexi in this area, she may just return the affection, I know that you see Lexi as the one that is the danger, but she is curious and brilliant, she is not intentionally evil in any way and she is in more jeopardy than Alex. you need to understand that the more attached to someone she is the more that she will do all in her power to keep them safe.”

Kara had paused for a moment and looked at her, she could see the conviction in her face in her voice, she was sure that Lena believe completely what she was saying, she had seen some of this in Lex, she was finding it difficult to completely move to a place that she believed it, but she was definitely finding it difficult to dispel it. There were more and more people, more evidence, more information pointing towards Lexi not being the Villain that Kal portrayed her as, she wondered what Lex’s side was, everything that she had heard so far pointed towards Lex being a neutral person used by others, it reminded her of Linda, Overgirl and Sara, all people that had been forces and manipulated into a life of destruction, fighting to be free of it, to know their place and forge a life. She contemplated this for a moment, and gave Lena’s hand a squeeze looking into her eyes once more. Lena loved Lex, and Lex deserved a chance as much as anyone, she had seen what would have become of her if someone else had found her, maybe without Lillian and her treatments, without the company and its direction Lex would have been doing something very different. She didn't want to see Alex hurt, or Lena, and if there was a chance that Lex and Alex would be together she would need to get over this, to try and see more than just the current common ground.

“I think that they may need some help, not just in expressing themselves but navigating this difference and difficulty between them, but before that I would really like to meet Lex myself, after all I am dating her sister, she is going to be in my life for a very long time maybe it is time that we find a way to get along, because for as long as you will have me Zhao I am yours, and Lex means everything to you. She is also starting to mean a lot to Alex, it would appear I am a little slow to change”

Lena couldn't help the swell of love in her chest, she wasn't sure if Lexi was ready for that yet but hearing that Kara would be willing to meet her and give her a chance this was a massive step forward she had not expected. She threw her arms around her and held her tight, kissing her deeply in response.

“I’ll talk to Lexi, I would really like that Kara, thank you”

Kara was about to respond when she heard a siren and she looked at Lena and offered a small sad smile, giving her a little kiss before heading to the door.

“Be safe Kara”


	37. Lena’s surprise lunch

Lex Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 13:00………

Lex guided Alex out of the lab and closed the door heading to the entrance and picking up the food from the elevator, she gestured over to the couch in the corner and moved with her placing the back on the small table, she took a seat and opened the bag pulling out the first box of food and a coffee. She looked at what was sent, it was not her normal friday lunch, she knew that Lena knew her schedule and was not sure why she would send her an alternative. She opened it up and it was a burger with all the trimmings and fries. She sat in confusion as she looked at it. Why would Lena send this, it was not something that she would ever eat, she was a little uneasy she didn't even know how to eat something like this.

Alex watched as she opened the box and her eyes lit up, if she wasn't mistaken that was a gourmet burger, with a layer of falafel, and special sauce, she smiled brightly, she wondered how Lena knew that she liked them, then she thought it was probably Kara that had mentioned that she normally brings a burger to her when they meet for lunch. She looked at Lex to see her confusion and wondered what was wrong. Maybe it wasn't what she was expecting, maybe there was only one meal. She looked into the bag and there was a second box, Alex pulled it out as she wondered why Lena would do anything to upset Lex. it seemed very out of character for her to do anything to upset Lex, she opened the box to see an avocado salad with honey salmon and she tilted her head for a moment and then looked at lex with a smile.

“I think this one maybe for you Lex, it looks like Lena ordered two different things, that is my favorite burger and I am guessing that this salad is your normal Friday lunch.”

Lex looked over as Alex spoke and could see that there were two different meals, and she smiled softly. It was just like Lena to do something like that, she would have anticipated it, she was always thoughtful and kind like that, it was something that she appreciated about her sister. As much as Lex herself was poorly equipped to understand social interactions, she also had little time or patients for niceties or the desire to learn things about others. She would have liked to be more like Lena in some ways; there was an ease that she had with people that Lex did not. She would tell by the reaction that Alex had to it that she really appreciated it and she would like to be able do things for Alex that she liked like this. She just didn't know what or why she wanted to exactly, there was no way that Alex could have any affection for her, after all she had only recently decided she was not evil. That was a long way off of any fondness. She handed over the burger and took the salad.

“That is just like my sister, she always does little things like this for people, she is so much better than me when it comes to things like this. You know when we were little she knew how I was feeling and would always do something to help, she just seems to be attuned to what people like and need. I think that it was something she developed to help me and to ensure that mother and father were placated as much as possible. Although mother seemed to find it irritating, she never cared for niceties. Tell me how you have your coffee Alex, I can safely conclude that if the meals are different the coffees are also tailored to our personal preferences.”

Alex took the burger with a smile and then watched as Lex’s face became softer, something that she alway noted when she was talking about Lena, there was such obvious affection there. She could see how special their relationship was, she wondered what it would be like to have that kind of reaction on her, what it would be like to have that much of Lex’s attention. She knew that Lex thought that sex was something that was anonomus and one night, there was a sadness to that thought, she wondered if Lex chose this way of life because of the way that the world viewed her, or if she had just never found anyone that could be more. She knew that she shouldn't be thinking along these lines but she couldn't help the way her mind strayed. The soft affection on her voice, the look on her face, the way it softened and made her even more beautiful. She looked at her and smiled.

“Black, I have it black with one sugar, I am guessing that Kara told her about it, but it is very nice that she is thoughtful enough to get it for me. Lena has many good qualities. I guess I have been so caught up in the things that she did to hurt Kara that I have forgotten the things about her that are sweet. I mean I am not all the way there to forgive her but I realise that I may have been a little blinkered when it has come to her. I guess now that they are dating I am going to have to try a little harder. How do you feel about it? I mean I know that you have difficulties with the supers in general and you are not happy with the time Lena spends with her, but what do you think about it?”

Lex smiled and handed the other coffee to Alex. It appeared they drank their coffee the same, so there was no need for one of them to test it. She wondered if there was a possibility that Alex would like her back and that gave her other things to ponder, would she be able to continue to hold her interest, would her inability to love be something that caused issues, the misunderstandings with Alex’s emotions and needs, would it lead her back to that dark place. She knew that Alex wasn't someone who would be interested in a one night deal, and she couldn't honestly say that would be enough for her. She had not been drawn to someone like she was to Alex, she found herself wanting a little more, but she didn't know if she was capable of that. Lena and her had discussions about her and when she was talking about how she thought Lex had developed feelings for her, she had suggested that she would like her to have what she had with Kara. She had not been able to picture it at first, but the more Lena walked about Kara and the relationship that they had the more it sounded appealing. The routine of someone with you, falling into a comfortable place where they were happy. She had started to think about how Alex could fit into her life. Now she couldn't help the thoughts drift into her mind. She looked up as Alex spoke and caught those caramel eyes looking at her intently. Her body seemed to react to her gaze, her heart rate picked up and there was an unexpected pull in her abdomen.

“Well as emotions are not factored into the equation, how I feel about the topic is a mute point Alex, I am aware that this is something that you find difficult to grasp, you attribute emotion to me that is not there. Although through my discussions with Lena I can see that she is very much in love with Kara, and the way that she talks about her is different.”

Lex paused for a moment, both Lena and Alex seemed to attribute emotion to her in a way that was easier for them to understand. She had sensations and when this became overwhelming she found it very difficult to deal with it was like there was a set of reactions in her body pulling it in different ways that she didn't have a manual for, although over time she had learned to anticipate them and label them with Lena’s help she knew that they were not experienced in the same way. The reaction that she had just had to the gaze from Alex, Lena would have been attributed to love, not desire, it was a biological reaction to a pleasing stimulation. She was well aware that continued stimulation could lead to her looking for sexual gratification but, she had difficulty attributing it to love as Lena would. She was just as much a slave to biological impulses as others.

“Humans are animals and have biological drives that dictate some of the more base functions and reactions so, at first there seemed to be some kind of biological attraction. The more Lena spoke about their relationship the more evidence there was to the thought that they are connected more deeply than that. It is almost as if they are chemical compounds that have combined creating a complex chemical reaction, they are changed and now inseparable, as the chemical reaction has changed both of them forever. This simple fact suggests that there is no relevance to what I think, I can no longer change the relationship as I can reverse the combustion of magnesium filament when it is exposed to flame. However the way Lena describes it, it is as though there is a symbiosis between them, much like the animals that work together, one providing food and the other removing harmful bugs from the skin of the other. Both of them seem to flourish together in a way they did not apart. As much as I don't understand all the things that she is saying about their relationship, she makes Lena happy and that is important to me, so I will be supportive of the relationship.”

Alex ran her hand through her hair. She had not thought about her wording and it had once again resulted in Lex reminding her that she didn't have emotions. Alex couldn't wonder if Lex had somehow found out that she had been developing feelings for her, and she was reminding her that there was no hope that there would ever be more between them. She couldn't help the disappointment that she felt, it wasn't like she truly thought it could happen but the day dream was nice. She listened to the thoughts on the relationship she couldn't help but think that the description although clinical in a way was also quite beautiful. That not only do they compliment each other but the combination of the two had changed each other forever. She thought about how romantic that this idea was, for someone with a self confessed lack of emotion and understanding of human behaviour. She had managed to describe the relationship she had observed between Lena and Kara in a way that conjured an image that was in its nature very much romantic. She couldn't help but wonder if the relationship that she spoke about in the cafe had been an animal one a simple biological connection or a complex chemical reaction. Her understanding of how a first love was different to any further relationships, and suggested that she had had a relationship and therefore her unwillingness to talk about it suggested that it was indeed the chemical kind rather than the biological.

“Well I have been in the same position, although I have to agree I haven't seen Kara this happy in a really long time. Lena and I used to be friends and worked together many times, I need to get back to that, so I can support them too. Have you ever met someone that has caused a change in you like that, a chemical change that can’t be undone? I think it would be nice to have that kind of connection in a relationship like that. They do both seem happy, I haven't had much luck in that area of my life.”

Lex watched the nervous movement and wondered what it was that was making her, she had observed this movement a number of times, it was always accompanied by a small half smile, and a tilt of the head. This time was no different, she had become accustomed to it, it was quite endearing, it generally was followed by an admission of something that she was hiding, or a revelation about something that has changed. The other option was she was about to ask something that was going to be difficult for Lex. She had noticed the more time that they had spent together the more difficult questions seemed to make Alex hesitant. She wasn't sure exactly what that meant, was there a desire to save her feelings? She had been quite clear about that. The other option was that she was concerned about what would happen if Lex lost control. Maybe there was a part of Alex that was concerned about her becoming unstable and going after Kara or Clark. Then the question was asked, Lex felt the moment the question registered she felt a tight squeeze in her heart as it tried to accelerate out of control. She started to tap out numbers on her fingers this was not a topic that she was over comfortable talking about. 

She thought about it, there had been many people that had caused a change in her, the first her mother, pulling her into the world. The second was Lena, she had come into her life and accepted her, been there for her and changed her in many ways. The third resulted in the attempt on her life, the woman that she had been attached to, that things didn't work out with. This was the first attempt at a romantic relationship with someone, the result was devastating. The fourth was Clark, the persona that she trusted more than anyone who had caused almost as much change as her first love and a lot more devastation, then there was Lane, his change had been some of the most difficult to reconcile. The second woman that she had romantic feelings towards was sitting in front of her. She was able to manage some control over her mind and the issues that occurred when she was pushed, she had Lex contemplating changing her thoughts on things in ways that she couldn't imagine previously. She was even thinking about things that she couldn't have because Alex was making her want it.

Alex could see the way that Lex was tapping her fingers. She recognised the pattern, it was the primes from the other day, she didn't want to cause distress again, she definitely didn't want to send Lex back into the situation from the dinner last friday. Damn it, she had opened her big mouth when she shouldn't have, she knew that. She remembered the way Lex had avoided it before, Lex kept on telling her that she didn't have emotions, didn't have relationships, she was indulging herself with fantasies of a relationship with her. She reached out and took Lex’s hand. She made sure to hold it with a firm touch and she smoothed her thumb over her wrist looking into her eyes. She wanted Lex to come back from her mind, to come back to the room, to reconnect with her so she could capture her attention long enough to soothe the difficulties that the question had caused. 

“Hey come on, Lex it's ok, there is no need to answer, I don't want to upset you. I was just trying to get to know you better. I mean we are going to be working really closely with each other. Maybe we should just get back to it?”

Lex registered the touch and looked down at the soft caresses of Alex’s thumb, there were soft tingles radiating from the warmth of her thumb rubbing over her wrist, the sensation was so nice, she had not been expecting it, she looked up and could see Alex looking into her eyes, the racing of her heart did not change as such but the sensation of the heart being squeezed was replaced by a swelling feeling and another clenching feeling in her lower abdomen. She could feel herself calming in one way as she started to become excited in another, this was a very unexpected and rapid switch her mind was reeling from the effect that Alex had on her. She took a deep breath and a small smile came across her face, Alex’s face was calm and caring there was no trace of anything other than concern for her.

“I think that would be a good idea, Maybe we should head back into the main lab.”


	38. Examining rocks

Lex Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 14:00………

Once back in the main lab Lex made short work of the security system and inputted the answer to the riddles to access the containers. She opened two of the containers and took out the samples. Selecting two that she had already analysed but would be of interest for Alex based on her questions about human effects. She wanted to show her a physical effect and a psychological one as she had tried to explain the vibrational differences in the samples gave an idea of how the different rocks affected the samples, and how some of the samples could influence humans in different ways too. Placing them down on the bench she looked at Alex and started to explain.

“Whenever you're taking the samples out if you take out two that are next to each other they will both become inert so ensure that you either bring out one, or two from different lines. Some of the samples affect humans yes, increased healing, strength, some have other properties but they are unstable this here looks like green kryptonite but it isn’t the vibration is off, it’s duck egg or something, this causes meta human transformation, that is not stable it caused issues with human transformation in smallville, I don't know how much you know about that, but this green is dangerous but in a different way. Although there was very little pure of this kind in smallville the effects were wide spread within the community when growing up. Clark had some very interesting supervillains to deal with, much like the meta humans that Kara has met and had to tackle.”

Alex watched her, she couldn't help but wonder if the riddles changed or if she just needed to learn the answers, although she thought that it would probably be a long while before Lex trusted her in her without her so she would probably not have to worry about that for a while. She watched as Lex took the samples out and cautioned her about taking two that were next to each other, that was one of the things that Lex had in a precaution, she was impressed that people that didn't know would neutralise the kryptonite. She looked at the green one, it did look green but it wasn't quite the same as ones that she had seen before, she wondered what the danger was to Kara in this case.

“Ok so make sure that the Kryptonite next to each other isn't taken out at the same time, this green isn't the normal green but is dangerous, is it dangerous to Kara?”

Lex opened a draw and took out four slides. Moving over to the fridge she took out some of the samples, and the last remaining sample of kryptonian blood. She prepared the slides each with different blood drops passed each one over the rock, the radiation field of it was sufficient that she didn't need to be in complete contact with the substance. She didn't have all the answers about Kara, she didn't think that there were any interactions with the egg shell alone, not for Kara but there was no way to know for sure, especially as it had some interesting properties. She lined them up next to the microscope and looked at Alex.

“From my understanding from Clark and the effects from Smallville it drains his energy and was painful to a point, but there was so much of it around, smallville was littered with Kryptonite, this and the original green so it's hard to tell, I don't know what it would do to Kara in honestly, this is pure duck egg not fused with Green. In Smallville there were no pure samples so Clark never came into contact with just the duck egg, although he did come into contact with a mix. Have a look at each of the slides and see what you can deduce. I can tell you that there is no physical action that suggests that the powers are reduced like with green. This one has a physical effect, tell me what you think the possible effects are and how that could affect the samples that I have put here for you.”

Alex looked at each under the microscope, she took her time to analyse each making notes on a notepad next to the microscope, she would have liked to see each sample before and after the exposure to compare them before and after, she she could be sure what she was seeing was the effects and not a celular anomaly of the genetic sample. She looked at each and made notes and then looked at them a second time and compared the before and after notes. She noted that the degradation of the first sample was slower than the second. After the second round she went back to the first and noticed that there was a slower reaction but the first sample had indeed degraded to the same point only at a slower rate. Once she was finally satisfied with what she had seen she turned back to Lex and started her analysis.

“Slide one and two both have a similar reaction both of them seem to have the red blood cells double in size, however the cells then seem to deconstruct each other like they are consuming each other until there is complete degradation, however the first sample degrades slower, than the second, they both appear to have the same end result. However the increase at the beginning would suggest that there would be an increase in speed or strength as there would be more oxygen and energy getting to the muscles. I would say that the effect is temporary and potentially would cause a significant issue with a live host for this rock, my thought is that once the effect was over the person would have seriously depleted red blood cells and that could lead to hypoxia. Eventually death. I am not sure what would happen if there was constant contact with the substance or if there was only degradation once the radiation was removed. It potentially could be a form of radiation poisoning.”

Alex looked at the results again to check them again, she didn't know why she wanted to impress Lex so much but there was something about this that felt a little like a test. She wasn't sure why but she just felt that it was important to do well. Her feelings for Lex had gotten to the point where she didnt want to lose the opportunity to spend time with her even if it was just working in a lab. She looked back at Lex who was still waiting for the rest of her assessment, she ran her hand through her hair and gave a small half smile.

“The second sample seems to have some kind of phase in it, the cells seem to vanish and come back going transparent and then coming back, it appears to affect the white and red cells, as well as the rest of the plasma. I am not sure what this means but there seems to be some kind of invisibility or cloaking that is happening with the blood. There is no degradation of the cells on this one although the flashes between visibility and invisibility seems to slow, suggesting the effect is temporary without the rock being there, although it had not completely stopped, I also don't know if the effect would be something the host would be able to control, or if it would be random.

She knew that the last one was the kryptonian sample and she was given it for one reason only, she was sure that this was there just to show that in its pure sense the eggshell was not dangerous. Not all green is bad, just like not all Luthors are. Alex was starting to think that the Luthor sisters were both cut from a different cloth to their parents and managed to survive that house, not unaffected but also not evil.

“The Last one is kryptonian and the blood doesn't seem to be affected that much if at all, although I thought that there was a small reduction at the first glance in the white blood cells, it went back to normal on the second look. I am not sure that the initial look was right, if it was there would be a immunosuppressant effect possibly but i think that I would need to watch as it was exposed to gather the information that would clarify that.”

She watched as Alex examined them and nodded as she gave her conclusions, Lex was impressed she knew that Alex was smart but she was almost spot on. She was looking at the cell impact and hypothesising what that could mean in response to the entirety of the individual. She also correctly analyses that one of the samples burned through quicker.

“The first two yes they become super strong but move into a state of necrosis quickly like burning magnesium, they are genetically related specimens. The first one is of a male and the second a female, the increased level of blood in the male body makes the reaction faster. The third is coding much like a chameleon, the skin samples that I had for that particular sample mimicked the ability of the chameleon to change the visual spectrum to blend into the environment or in this case copy the colours I placed them in front of. However with no purpose, the translucent slide just phases in and out. The Last one is indeed Kryptonian the effect of the rock is still not clear I have no current samples that I can check it with, I am not sure if the sample I have is reliable I would like to check with a fresh sample. I too thought I saw a slight reduction on the white blood cells, however the effect only happens once on any sample and reduces over a short period when it is not in the direct radiation field of the rock itself. It is only possible to observe it for about three minutes even when in direct contact with the radiation, it appears that one exposure to it in its pure form makes its own immunity.”

Lex thought back to the stories and experiences in smallville and sighed. There had been many different reactions to the rock, currently there was no way to predict how that would react to any individual or what aspects would be reacting, she had not been able to work out what the end result would be although she had been able to encourage some reactions.

“There were many affected by this and the effects vary although some can be triggered, I thought it was green too especially when looking at the samples from Smallville as it is mixed with the original, I am not sure if Clark and his friends really looked into it enough to notice it was two different types. When I say that some results can be triggered, like for example, electric current in conjunction with the rock can result in a power transfer or an electric charge within the boy a little like the reaction with livewire. I believe that this rock has been in contact with Clark and the change whatever it is may be permanent, as I said it appears to create immunity, there is a possibility that whatever change has become permanent. Clark has had his powers transferred on multiple occasions through lightning strikes.”

Lex was impressed with Alex and with her abilities and knowledge of bioengineering she could potentially help work out the outcomes. There was all manner of other things that the blood could be exposed to with the radiation that could then lead to a specific transformation, it could be something in the DNA, after all the DNA from both siblings changed in the same way. If they could code out the DNA sequences and the outcomes it would be possible to chart how the reactions would happen. 

“With your genetic analysis ability there may be a way that with time you would be able to anticipate the outcome with the samples, not that I think making metahumans or giving humans alien powers is a way to combat potential threats in my experience they do not handle it well.”

She was not sure what the point of categorising it would be, although if there was a way to increase the body's immune system or another function it could have medical applications. Not that this was her focus she just wanted to know what it did and this was one of those unsolved aspects of the rock. She looked up and smiled at Alex then motioned for her to come back to the table, moving the other sample forward.

“This is like a drug or alcohol only stronger, hidden emotions and thoughts lies and deceptions all brought to the surface. Essentially it removes the inhibitions of the person in contact with it, it acts like a truth serum, I believe that it is more powerful than any drug on the market, and is less intrusive than the truth seeker that the DEO used on Mother.”

Alex couldn't help but take Lex’s word as a compliment she liked that she had done so well. A small curl started at the corner of her lip on the left side, she felt so happy and proud of herself. She wondered how important it was to Lex that she had understood and was able to make an analysis that was accurate, she hoped that it would put her in good stead for future work. However there was something else in her that she couldn't deny, she hoped that she was good enough for the older Luthor, even if her logical brain told her that this wouldn't happen, her heart couldn't help wanting it. She needed to concentrate as Lex was speaking again and she wanted to continue to impress her, she also didn't want her mind to drift to things like how soft her lips looked, how the light in the lab seemed to highlight her soft features, when she was smiling like that. She wondered what it would be like to kiss Lex. how the firm touch translated to more intimate relations. She wasn't concentrating, she moved closer and leaned onto the table listening to the information. A truth rock that was interesting but at the same time very concerning.

“Well I am sure the guys in the government would love to get their hands on that but facing inner truths and feelings full on could lead to chaos. After all everyone hides things and keeps their emotions in check to a degree. Can you imagine how dangerous it would be to have all of those controlled impulses just let loose?”

Alex couldn't help but to wonder what would come out of her mouth if she was holding that rock. After all she was hiding some intense feelings about Lex from her, she wondered if her training with actual truth serum would help her with the rock, she wasn't sure how close she needed to be before it affected her. She couldn't help wonder if there was any further truth that could be pulled out of Lex, or her with the use of the rock, although she couldn't help but believe that Lex had been honest, not that she had been quite as honest. She wondered if Lex had tested the rock on herself.

Lex looked at her and the small smile was cute on Alex’s face, it was only there when she was unguarded. It would appear when she wasn’t paying attention. Like an involuntary action when she was feeling something unexpected. It was fast becoming something that Lex liked to see, something that she wanted to encourage with Alex, the more often that it happened the less guarded she was being with her.

“You're not wrong Alex, this rock on mass could be very dangerous, if everyone spoke the truth, confronted themselves, their emotions, everything out in the open then the world would be in anarchy. People lie to themselves as much as others, and not only for insidious reasons, people often soften the truth with lies to avoid hurting people's feelings. The way i communicate has caused a number of issues in the past if everyone was like me things would be clear but less than amicable in most environments”

She looked at the rock and thought about how that small thing could cause a paradynamic shift that was unprecedented. She wouldn't have thought about that without Alex this was what she needed, the other side to the inventions that she made. Although she didn't understand the way people communicated and the miss direction that they employed to avoid hurt feelings and maintain status quo, but everyone speaking and acting like her could be good for her, she would no longer feel on the outside.

“In a small dose it can be used as truth aid removing the need for interrogation but it also would be in direct conflict with the 5th amendment, I have felt its effects before yes, I can see you wondering the small twitch in the third quadrant of your face. Would you like a demonstration?”

She picked up the rock and looked at Alex. offering her a chance to ask a question she knew that she wasn't someone who hid things well anyway, and she had been even more honest with Alex than with other people, on the other side of the coin, Alex had asked some of the most difficult questions that she had answered in a long time.

Alex looked at Lex holding out the rock, did she want Alex to take it? Was she still not as trustworthy as Lex wanted? Was this a test of some description? And even though she had been honest with her interactions with her she had not been about her emotions. She wasn't sure how Lex would feel about that, although she kept saying that she did not experience emotions as others, Alex just couldn't see her as emotionless. There was too much depth to Lex for her to have no emotions. She was so much more than she believed herself to be. Right now she was holding the rock that would take away her ability to lie at all Alex could literally ask anything and she would be honest, not that she thought any more that Lex was lying, infact she wondered if all the expressions of Lex being manipulative were in fact just people who saw what they wanted in her. Of course Alex knew that she was a genius and that she would be thinking a million steps ahead and that she would have a way to get what she needed. Alex just no longer believed that it was through manipulation. She felt that people interpreted her honesty and her frankness as deception because of her reputation, the perception of others leading to the opinion not the actions of Lex. Alex wondered if there was something more here, if her feelings that were emerging for Lex was clouding her judgment, no one had ever been able to have Alex do so many one eighties in such a short period of time. She was completely lost in her own mind second guessing herself, her judgment and others, if she was right Lex was not what people said and she was actually an amazing woman.

Lex watched Alex and could see she wasn’t sure what Lex was offering, she wouldn’t suggest the agent taking the rock; she was aware of the level of secrets that she would have. The emotional volatility of the oldest Danvers girl also suggested this would not be a great option. She seemed lost in contemplation so maybe she was trying to work out what the endgame was for Lex. she couldn't help but assume that Alex was still hiding things from her, that there was still something she was hoping to gain, but at the same time she was offering any answer that she could want.

“I have been in contact with this rock before and I have the ability to put it down when it becomes too much, also the different way I experience emotion means it has a lesser effect”

She smiled slightly at the redhead, she had remembered the first time she had it in her hand it was a little bit overwhelming but it wasn’t so now. She assumed that it was like the sodium pentathol the more that it is used the less effective it became, or maybe it was the wiring in Lex’s brain that made it less effective.

“Ask me anything and I will have no choice but to answer with the truth. It is a demonstration Alex, you have nothing to worry about.”

Alex listened to what Lex said, she wasn't saying that she could lie when holding the rock but that if things became too much she was able to put it down, she wondered if there was something about the rock that stopped others putting it down. She thought about it for a moment the rock wouldn't be very effective if you could just put it down when the emotions or truth became hard. She wondered what the property was in the rock that caused the inability to put it down. Although knowing that Lex would if she didn't want to answer or the question was too much was strangely comforting, like earlier when Alex asked questions Lex had struggled, the first one Lex pushed through until she couldn't take anymore and she had held her. She smiled at the memory of Lex in her arms, then she remembered the second time. Alex had not wanted her to go through that again and encouraged a change of subject. Knowing that the rock wouldnt make her distressed was a comfort but she decided to ask something silly that wasn't about Lex.

“Ok, let's start with something easy, My last haircut was a bob and now I have this new one, what do you think of it?”

Lex lifted her brow and the corner of her lip pulled upward, that was about all she managed as the rock took effect following the direct question asked. Her hand curled around the rock as the direct question was asked, activating the rock, as long as Alex asked direct questions she was essentially sealed into the rock. She felt the effect take over as the answer formed on her lips.

“The previous hair, the Bob, brown, was very safe, neutral, not a hair cut to be noticed, the longer hair hid your features and disguised your beauty, an attempt to go unnoticed I would presume, as you were unclear about who you were, or are. This hair red is bold and exciting it begs to be noticed, the shaved side short giving a full view of your neckline and facial structure shows off the strong features, while the longer side cuts perfectly accentuate your cheekbones, jaw and pointing towards your lips, pulling the eye to your smile. The overall effect is enticing and very beautiful, the duality and boldness speaks more to you as a person than the previous hair. All in all I think that this one fits you better Alex”

Lexs mouth closed and she smiled softly. She didn't normally comment on the way people looked, in such a way, it wasn't that she had not thought about it, she had analysed every inch of Alex in her mind, how her clothes seemed to showcase her emotions and feelings, how the look of her face changed her overall aesthetics, she had spent a unusually ostentatious amount of time dwelling on Alex in general, she was quite the distraction.

Alex was stunned into silence, she couldn't believe what she was hearing from Lex, clearly she was not asking a silly safe question. If the soft burning in her abdomen was anything to go by she was enjoying the compliments and assessment of her appearance a little too much, not to mention the heat traveling up her neck and over her cheeks that was telling her that she was blushing. She was not sure how to react to that assessment, or the fact that Lex had spent some time contemplating her as anything other than the inconsistent variable that she couldn't predict. Right now Alex knew the feeling she would have never expected that comment to come from Lex. There was almost an admiration in the assessment that she wasn't expecting. She couldn't help but wonder if there was a chance that Lex could see her as more. She knew that Lex was a one night only person but Alex was definitely starting to think that she may be willing to explore that as an option, would it be better to have that one time or would it make this feeling worse. She needed to change her mind set before she ended up asking Lex something that she shouldn't.

“Well, um… thank you for the compliments, I wasn't expecting that detailed a um, assessment. Although I am starting to like this rock. So tell me Lex your inventions, your curiosity creates all sorts of things, you say there is no intention, but you seem to do things that have good altruistic applications, you know I don't think that you are entirely neutral, what is it that influences your moral compass?”

Alex’s pause gave time for Lex to think for a moment; a pause to notice the blush on Alex's face and how it looked, there was something in it that she couldn’t quite put her finger on, she wondered if Alex was embarrassed by what she said. If she had somehow crossed a line and made a social fopa after all they were now working together was this something that was inappropriate, for their friendship level or their working relationship. She was about to ask if she had embarrassed her or made her uncomfortable when she asked the next question... the rock kicked in and the answer came out without though.

“My moral compass I am not sure I have one exactly, you see it requires an ability I have not been able to obtain. To a degree I have learned to recognise emotions to a degree and understand what the sensations mean within me but empathy true empathy needs understanding and expression, I am unable to do that, to put myself in others shoes. Aspergers means a lack of empathic understanding.”

She tilted her head slightly and raised a brow. Her mind running through her inventions, it wasn't that she had set out to be good or bad it was curiosity and sometimes to make things more effective not to change the world or anything she wasn't sure how to express it, as her mind started to formulate an explanation the words started to spill form her lips.

“My inventions are always planned and thought out, Luthor Corp runs many hospitals, the money is often wasted and staff are always too busy to complete all tasks, it's wasteful, and inefficient. I created an Ai to take a part of that work that takes a lot of time freeing the people to care for others. The kryptonite I made to see what could be accomplished with it to understand to see its uses, where there is a use that is better than a current system I will use it to correct it, my obsessions and phases of mania can result in many options for things, where they are of use I apply them. So I am not sure if it’s a happy accident or just curiosity”


	39. Chapter 39: Turnabout is fair play

Lex Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 17:00………

Alex listened to her. Lex had a lack of empathic understanding? She wasn't convinced of this entirely, she didn't show things in the same way maybe but she cared in her own way and Alex was convinced that if it was Lena she was upset in some way she would notice and do everything she could to understand and make it better. When there was a small pause Alex wondered if she was trying to lie in some way, or if she was finished, as she started to speak again Alex realised that she was thinking about specifics, she hadn't been hiding but trying to show an example to explain. She couldn't help but wonder if this was additional and voluntary as she had not asked a second follow up question. 

Alex couldn't help but see the good in that answer, the attempt to make things efficient to free up people to deal with the care, it may have been to correct an inefficient system but there was so much good in it. Then Lex spoke about her mania, she already knew about the depressive moments and realised that a woman with a self confessed lack of emotions suffered from a mood disorder, that just gave more evidence to her thoughts that Lex in fact did experience emotions, not only that they were stronger than Lex would admit to. She was not sure if Lex had wanted to share that but she was glad that she had, it would make Lex even more complicated but none the less attractive to Alex. She wanted to offer the same trust and held out her hand.

“Ok, well I think it's only fair to exchange, after all we are both building trust, and I am curious about the effects, your turn to ask questions Lex.”

Lex didn’t worry about the stone in her hand although it did prompt a little more truth than she would ordinarily give, because she generally said what was on her mind it just made her more her, less programmed, she didn’t have to worry about the way that people normally hide things, she didn’t have to work so hard on trying to contain herself. She looked at Alex and her outstretched hand and pondered for a moment, she wondered about a lot of things in connection to Alex and well she knew she would get the whole truth. She placed the rock in her hand.

“You May feel a little woozy, but it passes. What do you really think of me Alex? Has it changed at all?”

That shouldn’t have been the first question she shouldn’t care but she did and it was out now so she would have to hear it good, bad, indifferent? She would find out. The thoughts about Alex and how often she thought about Alex, was something that was in the back of her mind, she was already thinking that one night wouldn't be enough, she wanted to have more, that one evening wouldn't satiate her curiosity. At least this would give her some kind of understanding about how Alex felt.

Alex couldn't deny being a little nervous, the rock was in her hand and she was not sure if it was affecting her, her confusion was removed the moment that Lex finished the question, her hand tightened around the rock and the effect took hold. She wasn't able to put it down there clearly was some additional factor with it. She felt dizzy and wavered on her feeling of gripping the counter as she tried to hold back from the rock. She had not expected that kind of question from Lex, and it was the one thing that she had been hiding. She needed to temper the effect.focus her mind on facts not emotions, what would happen if she told Lex she was attracted to her, physically as well as intellectually. She forced away her emotions with as much force as she could. She focused on the question of what she thought of Lex.

“Well to start with I thought you were a manipulative, deceitful monster, less than human, something that needed to be stopped at all costs, a dangerous murderer that had tricked the world into allowing her to take over the DEO and other projects to kill my sister and her cousin to take over the world, to get rid of all aliens by any means necessary and ensure that no one is free.”

Damn it, shit, that wasn't nice, she didn't want to say that to Lex she didn't want her thinking that she thought this of her, the question was what she thought of her and if that had changed, and it had she didn't want her to think that Alex felt this way or thought like this any more she needed to finish. She looked at Lex’s face and the way that she was already resigned to that as an expression of people's general feelings towards her.

“In a short period of time my thoughts have completely changed, I understand that you are not someone who wants any of this, you don't want to work for the DEO your not interested in power or domination, you just want to be left alone, your in no way a monster, you are thoughtful and brilliant, you have a lot of things that could benefit humanity even if you believe that you are not trying to be good, you are truthful and honest to your own detriment. I believe that you mean me no harm or my sister, that you love Lena so much that you would never do anything to harm her, your complimentary and nice to people, and you are someone I really enjoy spending time with. I believe that you can be an unbelievable source of good in the world. I like you Lex.”

Lex watched as Alex wavered and grabbed for the counter, she was clearly feeling the effects of the stone. She watched the concentration on her face. It was clear that Alex was fighting the stone, not that it would do any good. When Alex spoke she raised a brow, Alex had her as a monster no surprise really although it did make her heart heavy, then she wanted her to be good, not something she could be but was not trying to accept her. It was something. Although left her feeling an odd sense of disappointment. She had wondered if there was anything more, she knew she shouldn't but the thought that Alex liked spending time with her was unexpected, but at the same she was used to Alex being a little more emotional, she was expecting more explanation of her emotions.

“Wow Lex this thing is strange and well really pulls things out, I didn't want you to think that i still thought that of you, I had to run the second part through my mind, I am sorry I didn't want you to hear that, didn't want to hurt you, but there was no way i could stop it.”

“Yes wow it is powerful and not possible to lie although valiant effort Alex. It is nothing that I haven't heard before, although I am glad I haven't brought you here still thinking that. Why did you take the job with me? Is it some kind of rouse like asking me out?”

Alex wanted to continue talking about this, she wasn't sure if she had just ruined her relationship with Lex, although she wasn't sure there would ever be a chance for anything more before that comment she was sure there wasn't going to be one now. Lex’s comment that it was nothing that she had not heard before made her feel terrible, she didn't want Lex thinking that she was just like everyone else. She liked Lex, possibly too much at this point as there was no way that Lex would like her back. She was about to say something else and Lex asked the next question, she was so wrapped up in her thoughts she was not prepared with the Rock took effect and the answer just spilled out.

“When you started questioning me about what I was going to meet Lena for I panicked and asked you out so that I could get a little time to think of a good reason for meeting her that wasn't connected to the superfriends project. However once the invitation was out and you responded to it I realised that I was interested into getting to know you better, I had already changed my mind about you being a monster and saw you differently, I realised that the only way to get to know you better was to spend more time with you and I thought that a date was a good idea, so I asked you again. The more you suggested that it was something that I wasn't really serious about, the more I realised that I was indeed serious about going out with you to spend more time with you. So although it started as a ruse I really wanted to go on the date with you, and it was good until things went a little wrong, I am really sorry about that.”

Why had she started there that wasn't the question it was about the job, but the question made her think of the date, this rock was definitely more powerful than she had thought initially.

“The job well that was a harder decision, especially when thinking about how Kara would take it. I don't like anyone having Kryptonite, and it concerns me but although you have it, you are not trying to hurt Kara with it, you are trying to use it for the good of mankind, and although you are not sure what you will find, I am looking forward to the opportunity to understand it and you more. You also made it clear that you're not altruistic and I wanted to make sure nothing harmful comes of it.”

Lex’s lips curled into a wide smile Alex had been truthful with her, without the stone that was something that she would remember and try not to assume she lied. The words were different but the overall content was the same, it had been a distraction technique that had morphed into a date. Although she was confused there was no emotional content in anything she said, the woman had been mostly emotional in their dealings.

“Thank you for being honest with me, even without the stone Alex”

So the date thing was a kind of date, it was the first date that Lex had been on since she was, well since before the accident. It had gone poorly. Well in the end, although up until that point it wasn't a bad date, the topics had been a little more difficult than a normal date for what she remembered but still she had enjoyed Alex’s company. Lex had almost lost it completely. Alex had also been honest about her interest in the job, her reservations and her intention to ensure nothing bad happens. She reached out and held her hand and then put her other on the rock to remove it. Loving the way it felt to have her hand on Alex’s skin, she needed to manage these impulses to touch Alex, she wasn't tactile, not with anyone but Lena but she just wanted to touch Alex.

“I’m sorry about that, we had many difficult conversations which are hard for me, I was in need of a treatment to help stabilise. It's funny you have the effect of making me unstable but I can often control and get back but that was too much, I find your company confusing but pleasant. You really don't need to be sorry about that. I think you have punished yourself enough, when in actuality I had pushed myself too far.”

She clasped her hand around the rock taking it from Alex still holding her hand. With her mother, she wasn't sure if she should just let go, there was no social convention that stated after maintaining contact to accept an apology or reduce negative feelings that you had to pull apart or one the other way to say you needed to keep hold. She wouldn't normally do this, but Alex was tactile and a self confessed hugger, maybe she wouldn't mind her lingering.

Alex turned her hand and squeezed Lex’s, she had noted that although she had helped east the rock out of her hand she had left the other holding hers. She couldn't help but get excited as the warmth filtered away from the contact, her heart increasing in tempo as Lex held her hand. She was caught up in the moment for a moment when she realised that Lex had apologised for the way the date had gone, that she was sorry for the way it ended as much as Alex was, that she was apologizing. Did Lex think that she had caused her some kind of distress, she was concerned but about Lex, she thought that she had upset her, ruined any chance of seeing her again. Something Alex definitely didn't want to happen, then or now. The more she spent time with her the more time she wanted.

“I know my inconsistency and curiosity drives you crazy, it isnt my intention. I just have a big feeling that I seem to prefer a place in my mouth some days.”

She had grinned through the first statement as she looked at Lex, she didn't mean anything by the choice of words. She moved her hands to her hips pulling her hand free absentmindedly as she moved over towards the containers looking around a small device had caught her eye and she was making her way to it.

“So what else do you have going on down here? Anything that will help me? You know my skills make me more effective?”

Lex was not a big fan of the word crazy, but Alex seemed to offset it with a smile, she was getting too comfortable with Alex although her sudden pulling of her hand away from her told her that Alex was not as comfortable she pulled her hand back and turned to put the rock away as Alex asked the question and froze. She clenched her jaw and took a deep breath through her nose before managing to drop the rock into the container. It took a lot of strength and concentration to manage to get the rock out of her possession without speaking. She gripped the table with her other hand and took a steadying breath.

“There are many things here that could enhance your abilities”

She turned to look at Alex. She gave a small half smile. She didn't want to share everything that was in the Lab that could be used to enhance Alex or anyone else, there were things that she just wanted to ease into not just blurt out like that. She was not sure how Alex would take some of the enhancements either and she didn't want to end the possibility of working together before they got started.

“Something to help the superfriend? Is that what you would like?”

Alex looked at Lex. There was something about the way she reacted that worried her, she had made an effort to drop the rock, was there something that she didn't want to tell Alex. She looked a little hurt and wasn't sure why but the mention of the superfriends was her first worry, was she suggesting that she take the kryptonite to Kara and the rest? That wouldn't be something that she would do, for starters there was no way of knowing what the reaction would be on Kara or the others, Kara was also not all the way there with the thought of Alex working with the rocks let alone bringing them into the new project.

“I definitely won't be taking this stuff anywhere near Kara, she would freak out and we still don't know how it would react to her. Is there something other than Kryptonite here that I should be worried about Lex? You didn't want to be holding that rock then.”

She didn't mean to be so accusatory but if Lex was willing to show the Kryptonite, but did not want to talk about something else, then there was a chance that this wasn't the most dangerous part of the lab after all. She turned to look at her and crossed her arms across her chest as she tilted her head to assess Lex’s next statement.

Lex furrowed her brow, what had she done this time to upset Alex, she couldn’t seem to get a handle on her at all. She was accusing her of having something dangerous, thinking that she would want unknown substances next to Kara, she couldn't help but wonder if she thought that Lex was hiding something still. She was starting to feel tired; it had already been a day with a number of stressors, and this was shaping up to be another.

“I didn’t put the rock down to avoid telling you, I wanted you to know I told you about things because I trust you. There are many things I have worked on over the years that will need more explanation than just telling you it exists”

She looked at her and she wasn’t sure that was it. She wasn't sure that the trust issue was the thing that Alex was worried about, she went through her mind, was she worried about the knowledge of superfriends? Alex had named them that twice, she still was not sure what they were planning but she was sure that it was something to help Kara and that Alex would be alongside her when needed.

“The superfriends I was thinking more along the lines of mini drones to see all around, or ai defence a, maybe propulsion or....“

Alex looked at her she had not seen Lex look so unsure of herself and the way she trailed off concerned her, she tried to off set it with a smile, she really had not meant to sound that way she had just been caught off guard with the thought of Kryptonite with the superfriends and the way that Lex was mentioning them, she wondered if Lena had told Lex what they were doing. She wasn't sure that they were in a position to be telling anyone about it, after all what they were doing was effectively illegal, becoming vigilanties no matter how well organised and funded. Lex did seem to know what was going on though. She needed to talk to the others about this, she wasn't sure what to do in this situation.

“I think this may be a conversation for another time, um, it's getting late and I have an early meeting with Lena tomorrow, should I meet you at the Cafe monday?”

“The driver will take you anywhere you want to go, I will be there as always”

The feeling all to familiar in her body pulled at her, she could feel the “sadness” as Lena called it creeping in, she had said something wrong maybe she wasn't supposed to know anything about the superfriends but Alex name twice, Lena was working with her on it, she already knew about the dreamer girl and that Brainy was the blue/grey alien often seen with her, and J’oon was the martian, all she could assume was a independent strike team that Lena was funding, after all the trust she had given Alex it didn't seem to go the other way quite as much.

Alex could see she had messed up she didn't mean to but she had, she reached out and took hold of Lex’s arm to get her attention holding it firm and rubbing over the writs she had observed that Lex liked it. She looked into her eyes and could see sadness in them; it just about broke her heart on the spot. She watched as Lex tried to look away and took another chance placing her hand on the side of Lex’s face to tilt her head back she made sure it wasn't too Light but at the same time she was worried not to hurt her. As she captured her eyes again Alex had the overwhelming urge to lean in and capture the red lips of Lex, wondering if they were as soft as she thought, she caught herself as she started to lean and stopped looking into her eyes and lowering her voice, softening the tone.

“It's not that I don't trust you Lex, Lena wanted to talk to you about this when the time came, she was worried that you wouldn't find what we are doing easy, and she wanted to make sure you were alright, I am just trying to respect her wishes, it's been a hard day how about we call it a night, you have a reservation in forty minutes.”

Lex had felt the touch she was becoming accustomed to the way Alex touched her, the way she held her and rubbed over her wrist, the way that the heat radiated from the connection of their skin, she looked at Alex and it was like her eyes were penetrating into her soul, if she had one, it was intense and she had to push away the sensations in her body and reduce the eye contact before she did something stupid. The touch of Alex’s hand on her face was almost perfect, she moved her head to face her and she felt her breath hitch, the words were full of sincerity and there was a moment she thought that Alex was going to kiss her, she swallowed hard as she listened to the words, Lena wanted to make sure she was stable, she wanted to be sure her supporting supergirl wouldn't upset her, and Alex as much as she had difficulties with Lena wanted to honour her decision. A small part of her wondered if Alex who she knew to be protective was trying to protect her too. That she cared for her, Lex wasn't sure that she should entertain this thought, but it was already there.

“Ok Alex, well when that day comes I have some ideas you can exit without difficulty and take the car, the driver will take you where you need to go, and I will see you monday


	40. Proving they can try

Lex town car (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:20………

Alex had been dismissed again, she knew that Alex was not sure how she kept doing that without upsetting her, it was an interesting dynamic, she was normally so stubborn about things like this, the thought that she was dismissible was that she was less than and that would normally be a trigger for her. However when Lex did things like this she just seemed to accept it, there was no malice about the way that she did it, it was always just a brief recap and an end to the conversation. She didn't feel like Lex was doing it to be dismissive or condescending, it was a formal end to the conversation she assumed that it was some kind of social convention. Something that she had learned that at the end of a conversation there was a need for clarity. That thought made Alex think that maybe it wasn't a social convention but a Lex thing. She likes clarity. It was so very important to her that she had definite and defined limits and ends to things. There was an element of control that Lex needed to stay stable and she found that she was not worried about it, that actually she liked the routine. She was sure it was just because she liked Lex, no one else would be able to get away with this with Alex, and she sighed knowing that this was the truth, that the way she felt about Lex made this almost endearing.

Alex realized that she was not paying attention to the route, she thought about it for a moment clearly she was preoccupied with Lex and she had not been thinking about where it was that she was working, what's more there was a part of her that didn't mind not knowing. She felt safe with Lex, it was a strange revelation, not only was she happy to be working with her, that she was excited by the challenge, that she was inspired by the prospects and that she also liked spending time with her. She had almost just kissed her, she knew that it was a bad move, that Lex wouldn't be interested in being with her, that she wouldn't offer more than a one night, and that it was not necessarily on offer with the lack of anonymity that Lex preferred. She didn't know what to do about it and normally it would be something that she would speak to Kara about what was going on, but this was not appropriate. Kara wasn't on board with Lex in general, not with Alex working there, and although she did know that Alex liked her she wouldn't be on board with a relationship not that she was going to get that either. Kara was trying with Lex on two fronts, she knew that she was trying for Lena and she was trying for her too. This was something that she was sure would be an issue as Kara was dating Lena. She registered the car slowing and realized that she must be at LCorp. Alex had asked for a lift there as she had left her motorbike there in the morning.

Somewhere above national city (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 17:20………

Kara had had to run off from lunch and had a number of small saves that she had to make before she returned to CATCO. She tried to work but there was something playing on her mind, she had been talking to Lena about the relationship between Alex and Lex, she was nervous about meeting with Lex, but more than that she didn't like Alex being out of range. She had tried to hear her, to call her to be able to pinpoint an area over the City that she couldn't hear anything but there was nothing, no way to find Alex. She trusted Lena and she believed that Lex would do Alex no harm. She knew that Alex liked her and if Lena was right Lex liked Alex, this was a whole other issue. They wouldn't be able to get it together; they were both oblivious, she would agree to help if she knew she would. She wanted Alex and Lena happy and if that meant time with Lex, a relationship with her then Kara would find a way to get on board. She was never going to like not being able to hear or contact Alex. she checked in on Alex’s heart almost as often as she did Lena’s and this was uncomfortable for her. Not being able to pinpoint her, not knowing that she was safe. Kara knew she had issues around loss and abandonment, this was just triggering all the negative possibilities.

She was hovering high listening out for Alex, Lex had a schedule Lena had told her that this was really important to her, she had dinner at seven pm it was always at seven. Now it was six, and if she was going to get to her dinner reservation they would have to emerge soon. She was concentrating on listening waiting for the moment that her heart would come back into focus. She closed her eyes and listened. She needed to know that Alex was ok, that she was safe, she just needed to see her. As she closed her eyes there was a thump, then another, soon the thumps made a familiar rhythm Alex, she was out of wherever she had been all day. Kara flew towards the sound and landed in front of Andrews Cafe as Alex stepped out of the town car. She could not contain her relief and excitement she sped over to her as she turned and grabbed her into a tight embrace completely forgetting that she was in her super suit.

The car door opened and Alex thanked the driver stepping out of the car and she heard the familiar sound of Kara landing hard on the ground, she turned to look and could see her in a crouch, her hand on the floor and without even a moment to adjust there was a blur and she found herself within a tight hug from supergirl. She hugged her back already noticing that there were people starting to look.

“Hey supergirl, nice to see you again, is everything alright”

Kara realized that there was a small crowd gathering outside the Café, she had not even given a second thought to the suit or the hug, she needed to get a grip on her emotions and actions, she would need to manage herself better especially around Lex. She moved back from her sister and stood tall, taking the supergirl stance so that she would sound more official.

“Everything is fine, there were a few issues in the city and there was a suggestion that you were in danger, I was just glad to see you. I am sorry for being a little inappropriate Miss Danvers, Now I see that the information about your demise was inaccurate.”

She smiled a little awkwardly and moved back to take to the sky that was already enough for social media gossip, she said her goodbyes and took to the sky, she listened as she pulled up and waited Alex and her had a way of communicating she knew if she waited a moment Alex would give her some kind of instruction. Then she heard it, Alex had said she would grab food and see her at her flat. She headed off to Alex’s place slipping in through the window and waiting for Alex to get back, she wanted to talk to her, find out what she had been doing all day, check that she was ok. She sat down and waited, then stood and paced, then she sat and repeated over and over, the whole time listening to Alex’s heart getting closer and closer, that should have been comforting however the closer she got the more nervous Kara was about what to say she knew about Lex liking her, but should she say something to her? She knew both of them liked each other from the conversation with Lena, but would Alex take Lena’s word? If she didn't say anything would Alex think that she wasn't on board, she had promised and so had Alex. She was out of time, Alex was at the door.

Alex had been thinking about what to tell Kara all the way home, she had stopped to get food and was now out of all delays she put the key into her door and turned the key. She had barely opened the door before Kara was right there arms wrapped around her and talking a million miles a minute. Even with years of experience at understanding Kara during super speech she was completely lost, Kara didn't even take a breath all the words were running together.

“AlexwhathappenedwithLexIhavebeensowrooiedeventhoughlenasaidthatLexlkesyouandwouldnthurtyouicouldntheartyourhearticouldntfindyouandthemomentthatyouheartwasbackontheradarijustswoopeddowninmysupersuitandmadeamessandidontknowwhatyouhavebeendoingdoyouevenknowwhereyouhavebeen?imeanhasLextrustedyouwiththelocationisthereanythingtherethatcanhurtyou.doesshereallyhavelotsofdifferenttypesaretheystoredaswellasLenasaid?isitsafe?”

Alex looked at Kara and the words came out like some kind of keyboard smash, everything running together, she could pick out one or two words, or names, Lena and Lex were in there but she couldn't really make out anything. She placed her finger over Kara’s lips and smiled, clearly Kara had been panicking all day and this was not going to be productive, she needed Kara to slow down and breath for a moment, then try again. Once Kara had stopped she placed the food on the kitchen side and turned back to Kara. She really did understand the anxiety Kara faced when there was someone she cared about was not trackable, someone out of place, missing that she couldn't protect. She knew that Kara would have spent the whole day worrying about her, she was sympathetic but they had talked about this and that Alex was doing something for her, to keep an eye on Lex although that did feel secondary since she had been into the lab, she was excited by the project and spending time with Lex. She spoke softly and slowly hoping that it would calm Kara.

“Ok now I didn't get any of that, even my intensive course in super speech didn't prepare me for this. I get it. I have been gone all day, you have been anxious and now you're trying to get everything out, how about we sit, eat pizza and then you try that again slowly.”

The moment Alex’s finger touched her lips she stopped speaking finally checking in with her brain. She listened to Alex and she had not caught anything she had said. She started to think about what she had said, she had spilled everything in a nervous ramble and that was not something that she wanted to do, she needed to think about this, Alex and Lex liking each other was something that she needed to think on more she definitely shouldn't be just blurting it out, Alex had insinuated that there were feelings there but she knew Alex well enough to know that this was not something that Alex would be ready to talk about yet, she would need to come to Kara about it. The other things she needed to talk to her more softly about. She took a breath and smiled, then she hugged her sister again. Calming herself, after all there was nothing more calming than a hug from her sister. Well maybe a hug from Lena, she smiled at the thought of Lena and that calmed her further. She snagged the food and made her way over to the couch in a quick burst, slipping a slice out and chewing to give herself a little more time.

“Ok you are right, I was just anxious about you being gone all day, and I was a little overwhelmed. How was the first day with Lex? Is the lab safe? Is the project going well?”

Alex wondered if this was something very different to whatever Kara had said the first time, for starters that there was a lot less said, and there was no mention of Lena in this clearly Kara had revised what she had to say. She wasn't sure why Kara would change what she said but she was clearly not ready for her to be talking about Lex, she had been worried about talking to her about it so maybe this was a sign that Kara wasn't ready to hear it. She grabbed herself a slice and sat next to Kara.

“Well the Lab is amazing and so much more secure than anything that I have ever seen, I don't think that you could even get to the kryptonite, and if you did it would all be made inert, she has things that would make you stronger and something that counters traditional green kryptonite. She had a number of rocks some of which react on humans, there was one that acted like a truth seeker and one that created powers in humans, she said that it was in high concentration in smallville. That Clark had experience with it but the smallville samples were often fused with traditional green so they had a negative reaction on him, has he mentioned the issues?”

Kara wasn't sure if the comment that even Kara couldn't decide if it was good or bad, the level of security to keep Kara out would probably be something that was fatal to others which she wasn't sure that she was comfortable with. The mention of the rock from Smallville made her anxious. Clark had spoken about the green kryptonite during one of his visits, it was the first time she had heard about kryptonite. She didn't realize that there were two kinds there the stories that Clark had told her were quite scary. He had not said that it was two forms together, maybe he didn't know. A truth serum sounded dangerous and what if it affected her too??

“Well Clark said that in Smallville there were a lot of people who had metahuman abilities, but that the change made them all very dangerous, he spoke about people that could be invisible, people that were very strong, people that took his powers, and could control plants all sorts of things. There were always people with abilities causing problems, him and Cloe seemed to always be on the trail of someone with abilities. The truth rock will that work on me too? How is she working out the effects on Kryptonian's?”

Alex couldn't help but think that this could be a difficult question to navigate, there was the request from Lex to see if she could get some samples, she knew that Kara would have an issue with it, she wanted Kara to trust her with the samples even if she couldn't trust Lex yet. She needed to make sure that the samples were safe to have around ones that were not going to hurt Kara and samples would help. The other thing she wanted Kara to know was how safe Lex was being. The ones that would be a problem were the ones that could affect her emotionally or psychologically. This would be more difficult to work out, some may have no effect but Lex was actually not taking any chances. Something that Alex knew logically was because she thought that Kara could be dangerous if effected, something that Kara should appreciate.

“Well that was something that I wanted to talk to you about. Lex had samples of kryptonian DNA and hair but she has run out now, and well to work out if there are effects. Lex has categorized the vibrations and has been able to group them, ones with similar vibrations to red she thinks could affect you psychologically. There is a group that she thinks could affect your emotions, but she is not sure, the ones that she is not sure about are stored more securely, but she wants to make sure there are no physical issues. There are a number that she has left to check, I was wondering if there would be a chance to get a few samples from you?”

Kara was not sure how to respond to that, but she could hear the increase of Alex’s heart rate and the nervousness in her voice. She was not thrilled with the thought of Lex having her DNA but at the same time if Alex knew that Lena had it she wouldn't be happy either, maybe this was a good thing, her own anxiety about this would rival Alex’s and this would show if they were both going to be able to support each other, Alex may not be dating Lex but for her to be asking for samples from Kara she trusted her and was serious in her feelings. She decided that this was the perfect moment to offer an olive branch and see if Alex would be able to do the same. She would tell Lena that Alex knew before their meeting tomorrow. Just in case she didn’t want Lena to be blind sided.

“Well Lena has a number of samples, I will ask her to give you some tomorrow, we have been working on our energy cells and we needed blood for it so we have some that could be given to Lex.”

Alex was surprised that Kara had offered the samples so easily but the fact that she already had them was a shock, she had not mentioned that she had been working on something with Lena that needed blood. How on earth had they got blood? Did that mean that Lena had Kryptonite again. What if there was an argument, what if Kara didn't show for a date, if something went wrong? Would she be suffering again in another cage of Kryptonite or would it be something worse. She thought about it and this was a test right, something that would show that Alex could put her mistrust behind her, that she could be there for Kara, that things would work out, she pushed her anxiety down and smiled as she rubbed her hand over the back of her neck. She took a final breath and looked at Kara who was clearly nervous awaiting an answer.

“Right ok, well that would be fine, and it would really help with making sure there are no physical effects. I will pick it up from Lena Monday though, I am not going to be back in the lab until then. As for the other effects maybe there is an opportunity to find out what they do to you, but only the ones that could help with something else, and not for a long time. You know she had ones that help with agriculture but there is no way I am letting it go out anywhere if it could affect you, so maybe we could look at a safe test?”

Kara had not expected that she didn't mention Kryptonite or how she had got the blood, she was impressed that Alex had been able to accept this. She was a little shocked at the second statement though, did Alex want her to be exposed to kryptonite? Something that she didn't know what was going to happen? She was saying that it wouldn't be for a long time but does that mean that there would be a time that Alex would ask her to do this. She wouldn't let herself be exposed to something that they didn't know what it would do without a lot of safeguards and as much as Alex may dislike the idea one of them would be Lena. she wasn't thrilled at the idea at all, but what if there was something good that could come from the destruction of her home. That her planet would die and this planet could benefit in some way, she was interested in what kind of benefits that the rocks could have. She had wanted to help save Krypton but there was nothing that they could do, what if something from her home could help save earth. She would need time for this, time to be ok with the thought of having herself altered by the kryptonite.

Kara was about to speak when she heard a shout followed by a screeching sound, her head whipped around and she was up heading out of the window and flying towards the sound where she could see a woman in the direct path of a fast moving oncoming car. She pushed hard and there was a sonic boom she heard the windows shatter and she couldn't focus on the trouble that she would get in, the car was seconds away from hitting the woman that was standing in the road apparently frozen to the spot. The car was not going to stop, and she wouldn't be able to stop it safely, the only option was to move the woman, she just managed to get in front of the car in time to wrap her arms around the woman and fly into the air above  
CharMichaels. Kara hoped that she didn't hurt the woman with how tight she had gripped her, she was just so concerned that she wasn't going to get to her in time. The woman spoke……

“Perfect that is just perfect……..”


	41. Gay panic

Lex Lab (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 18:20………

Lex watched as Alex turned and moved towards the door, she liked that about her, she wasn't sure if she was aware that Lex was struggling in the moment, it had been a difficult day with the historic talk earlier in the day and some difficult questions over lunch. She had just closed down the conversation and more or less sent Alex on her way and she had said nothing and just moved out of the lab, no comments nothing. The almost kiss had been the final uncertainty in her day, the thing that she couldn't manage in the moment. She and Alex were entering another area of difficult conversation with her about the superfriends and they had a misunderstanding. One that Alex corrected in a kind and almost loving way, the touch to her cheek the words it was all things that would be a part of a romantic scene. Then the way that she caught her eye and leaned in had caused Lex’s breath to catch. She was almost ready to lean the rest of the way when Alex stopped. Lex’s heart had sunk in that moment and she had realised that the kiss was not going to happen.

Lex had long since given up any hope of dating, or romance in the classical sense, she was happier with the beauty of a mathematical equation, the answer to a problem with a design or the way something else that you are experiencing can give the answer to modify something to make it work better. The exquisite merging of two seemingly incompatible systems that compliment each other. The way that the suit and the AI merged even though they were not systems that should have been compatible and they created something else. Although she was not proud of the way that the suit was manipulated, the merging of the two systems created an intelligence that was able to defend its own self. This to Lex was romantic, this was something that was so much easier to deal with than the complexities of human relationships. She had gone to such a dark place when her first relationship had failed, then the second had not been much better, she realised that this was not something that she was able to work with. The constant uncertainty in regards to what the other wanted or needed, the emotions the way to navigate an endless list of demands and needs of another person. Not to mention the way that her own reactions were impossible to understand. However something about Alex made her want to be able to be better, to be able to be like everyone else. 

Lex was wandering around the Lab finishing up and putting things away as she was contemplating this. She knew that she wouldn't want just the one night with Alex but she was not confident that she would be able to give Alex what she would want not that she thought that there was any way that Alex would want her, before or after the truth about her history came out, as much as she was happy that Alex had changed her opinions of her it was a far cry from liking her back. Lex was not sure that she should be thinking about this again after all they were now working together, they were also the older sisters of National cities newest super couple. There was no way that they would be anonymous, there was no way that one night would be an option, and Lex really didn't want that, but the inevitable failure of Lex to manage a relationship. There would inevitably be a point that Alex grew tired of her and they split up, which would cause problems for Lena. She sighed and went to the outer lounge and set the security and then took the garment bag and took out her dress. She was changed and ready to go by the time the driver was back with her.

She arrived at CharMichaels for her normal seven oclock reservation and went inside. She was shown to her seat as normal and the waiter came over with the menu, she waved her hand and told him that she just wanted her normal. She sat there and waited for the wine. She didn't notice the strange look that she had, she had always kept up the pretense but tonight she was off balance, she was sitting there watching the couples around the room. She was imagining the soft touches she could see, wondering what it would be like to be with Alex and receiving those kinds of touches. Then the kisses, the longing looks, the soft laughter, she could see herself laughing at Alex, the way Alex had looked at her earlier. The way she had leaned in she could almost imagine the kiss. Although she wasn't sure what kind of kisser that Alex would be but she could imagine the soft feel of her lips, the pressure being just right, Alex had shown all the signs of being an attentive lover. Lex looked up at the cough and realised the waiter was there with her food, she smiled and ate, not looking at the other people or the waiting staff, she felt as though everyone was looking at her, that everyone knew that she liked Alex, that she had almost been kissed by her. She finished her meal and paid heading out, she needed to speak to Lena, this was causing her to feel like she was unraveling. Maybe it was time for another treatment.

She had not called for her car but knew her driver would be parked just around the corner. She started across the road heading to the area the town cars parked. There was a shout and then a screech as tires skid on the road and brake pads called out in protest over the hard braking. She looked around and saw the car careering towards her. She turned to run but she froze on the spot, Lex had never frozen in her life, she was visualising Alex’s eyes, her face as she had leaned in, holding the image in her mind as she struggled to move. Then there was a moment where she felt immense pressure on her side and then a small crushing feeling. It was a little painful because of the pressure, not the lightness of the touch. She was suddenly weightless and realised that she was in fact not hit by the car that the pain was that of being scooped up by a super.

“Perfect that is just perfect…….. my mind is still spinning because your sister almost kissed me, then didn’t, when I was actually happy with the idea, proving she could never like me back. Right at the moment I realised that there is no future there and I have to have some help from my sister, I almost get hit by a car. I could have ended all this turmoil, removed the inconsistency and avoided the months of instability, then just like your cousin you swoop in and save me leaving me with all this mess in my head. Mess that was caused because I like your inconsistent sister and she will never like me back, well thank you very much”

At the voice Kara knew that she was holding Lex, this was not the way she wanted to meet with her, she had said to Lena that they should meet and get together, she knew that Lex had issues with Clark and Supers in general. She kept holding her tight and smiled apologetically to Lex. It was only at this moment that she realised what she had been saying, there had been an almost kiss between Lex and Alex, and not only that Lex was interested in Alex but that didn't sound like a one night thing to Kara. Lena had said that there were no relationships in her sisters life and well Alex has said that she was a ethically promiscuous woman, that was just a posh way of saying that there was one night only relations. There was no way that Alex would be interested in that, however the way that Lex had just spoken about it sounded more like she wanted a relationship but this was the opposite of everything that Kara had expected.

“I’m sorry, am I hurting you I grabbed pretty tight there, um I didn't know it was you, I just heard the person scream out and then the car, I almost didn't make it, I am glad I did though Alex and Lena would have been upset if you had been hit by a car. I should put you down, um, where should I take you? You and Alex, you almost kissed? When did this happen? I mean wow, you like her, what makes you think that she wouldn't like you?”

Lex looked at the face of the super holding her, she had just apologized and asked if she was hurting her, this was an unexpected question, and she didn't know that it was her, she had just saved her because she was close enough to hear there was an issue. Was this it, the reason for the inconsistencies, the proximity of the super to the incident. Is that why there were such random saves, was Clark just close enough to hear the convict over the doctor? Was she trying to make sense of the reasons for the save when it was literally just proximity? Lex had never considered that there was something as simple as the location that had caused the saves. Her smile was even apologetic and Lex could see no signs of deception in her. She did want to be returned to somewhere more solid, but strangely she felt better, about the super issue. Then there were the questions about Alex and the kiss not to mention the final question, did she think that Alex would like her back? Lex was suddenly feeling the heavy feeling that had been settled on her heart since before the almost kiss when things started to go a little wrong. She felt weightless and not just because she was currently flying.

“This is not the appropriate place to have a conversation Kara, after all you have literally just snatched me from the road and we are just floating up here. I would appreciate it if you would continue the pressure while holding me, I would also appreciate having my own feet on the floor. There is also the question of why you are asking those questions, I would have assumed that you would have spoken to Alex the moment she left my lab.”

Kara started to float down to the ground heading to the park the other side of the road and placed her on the ground before letting her go, she was careful to maintain the pressure and moved back rubbing her hand up her arm and rocking on her feet, looking at Lex she was not sure what she should do, most people were happy to be saved, she also wanted to hear more about this situation with her sister. She knew that she shouldn't push and she should probably go back to Alex but she was terrible at keeping out of things she knew that, she just wanted to help Alex and it did look like Lena was right about Lex, they were both terrible at this completely oblivious to the other, and well more information would help her and Lena.

“So you and Alex? I mean you almost kissed and seriously she is working with you and going to have dinner with you. Why would you think that she doesn't like you? Where were you going? I think that we could talk, maybe Lena wanted us to get together.”

“Well I was planning to head to Lena’s so that we could arrange another treatment, the whole day has been rather trying what with Alex’s questions about things and then the kiss that didn't happen.”

She was still feeling like she was lighter than she was earlier, and there was something about the way that Kara was speaking that made her think that some insight from Alex’s sister might be a good idea, she would have to be careful though after all her filter was not good at the best of time. She pinched the bridge of her nose as she contemplated what to say, her mind once again pulled up the picture of Alex, her face leaning in to her but stopping. Her disappointment in the moment and the subsequent thoughts about Alex and everything how she was realising that she wanted more from her, and that one kiss, one night wouldn't be enough she was trying to pull her thoughts back instead her mouth opened and completely filter free the words spilled out.

“Although I supposed that is a good thing, after all one would not be enough, I don't think that once with someone like Alex would be sufficient for me. She is an amazing person. She is strong and intelligent, analytical and decisive but at the same time she is insecure. She challenged me and made me better, she had the ability to see the possibilities in my ideas but also is mindful of the effect that this could have, and that is something that I don't have the ability to do, she will make my work better too. She is also pushing me to the point where I am able to stabilize myself.”

Lex needed to get a grip on herself she could feel her thoughts spiralling towards a life with Alex where she didn't need to take treatments, that with Alex she would be a better and more stable person, but she needed to get back on track, back to the situation at hand, the question of why Alex wouldn't want her, that was the one she needed to answer, and maybe there would be something from Kara that would help. After all she wasn't lying when she said that one night with Alex wouldn't be enough she would want more, but that wasn't her, she couldn't manage a relationship and it would go wrong, it always had before. Could it work with Alex? with Alex’s ability to make her better would she be able to make her better at this too.

“This isn't something that I should be talking about with you, after all you are her sister. Not to mention that we are working together and well you and my sister are dating so there would always be a connection. So it isn't like the normal anonymity applies so she would know it was me and everything that comes with me. She may be able to not see me as a monster any more but I am still the most universally feared and hated person in the world, that idiot male version of me wanted the fear instead of respect he could have written any world and he chose to have one where no one wants to be near me. Why would Alex want that in her life?”

As Kara watched and listened to Lex she noticed a number of things. Firstly talking about the day and that it was difficult, the almost kiss was part of the difficult feeling. Because she had wanted the kiss to happen, then after a short moment of pause she watched a small smile come across Lex’s face and then there was an increase of her heart rate, the monologue about what she thought about Alex. The more she spoke the faster the heart became and she realised just how much Lex liked her. Lex seemed to realise that she was rambling about Alex and then moved on. She seemed to have accepted her and Lena, and not only that she was willing to put her own desires aside so that they would be able to continue, the same feeling that she had about Lena, that she wanted her in her life however that would be, she was afraid of losing what she already had thinking that she wouldn't get what she wanted. She really did want more than one night one kiss, she knew that Alex was not a one night person, this was amazing news. She had a brimming smile that was threatening to burst across her face, she tried to reign it in but there was excited energy running through her.

“You have spent time with Alex now, you must have realised that she is not like other people. You know she doesn't see the world the same as other people, she took in an Alien sister and made her feel like she belonged, she doesnt think like other people and she definitely doesn't allow other people’s views to change her mind, she makes her own decisions. Just like she has with you, she has made up her mind about who you really are”

She smiled now at Lex and she couldn't help the way her excitement started to take over, she wanted to help Lex understand that there was a possibility of something more, she didn't want Lex to think the same way Lena did, or her, after all they wasted a lot of time worried about losing what they had already.

“Why would she like you? Because she thinks you're brilliant and you challenge her, she found today in the lab amazing and she has already asked me to give you samples to continue the work. She enjoys time with you, thinks you're beautiful and someone worth her time and mine. Alex is a hard person to change and once she had made up her mind that is it, but she changed her mind about you, she likes you, and has put her trust in you, once that happens she is the most loyal person in the world.”

She remembered what was said about Lex, how she needed things to be clear, how she needed clarity, that anything ambiguous would cause additional problems for her, Lex was already having thoughts that she was unstable although Kara was seeing this differently too, she could recognise gay panic, she had seen it in Alex, in her self, in Lena and right now she could see it in Lex, the dazed and confused look, the thought that Alex couldnt like her back the worry about ruining what they had already, the connections in their lives.

“I mean she already likes you Lex, and well if you want to get checked out by Lena I can take you there, but I don't think that there is anything wrong with you, I think that you are having the same kind of reaction that everyone does to an almost kiss.”

Lex was a little surprised with the things that Kara was saying, of course she knew that Alex was different to most people, it wasn't just because she was interesting or captivating her attention, the way she was was different, she was a paradox in every respect, strong but vulnerable, stubborn but flexible, she was strong and vulnerable, there was so much about her as person that engaged her curiosity, not to mention her interest. She also knew that she was different in her approach to people, she had been able to change her view on Lex, she didn't lie easily, although that was not quite true she was able to lie for a living, however she had not been able to lie to Lex, any more effectively that Lex could lie to her. She saw that her protective nature was something that pushed Alex forward. However, Alex had talked to Kara about her, had defended her that she was about to jump in for a moment but then Kara was very specific, Alex liked her, that was something, how was the next question. Did thinking she was beautiful mean that it was romantic? That Alex could see her as more than just Lex? And what about Maggie? Were they back together or were they not?

“She doesn’t think I am a monster, she has told me that. She believes I am a good person, that I am going to do good things for humanity and likes me, but I do not profess to be any of that, I have told her I am curious not intentionally good or bad. Why would I have a reaction to that, it sounds like you are attributing an emotion to me, and I do not experience them like others, after all Alex is dating that pushy cop It was possibly one of the times that I miss read the situation, I can sometimes miss read social conventions”

Kara watched, for someone so smart and confident it was strange to see this side to Lex. Alex had said that she was not what she appeared, she knew what it was like to feel different, to miss read situations especially when things were not easy to understand, like dating that was a big one for her, as the last four years had shown her, things were so much simpler on Krypton and this was just a world filled with minefields. Lex had the same kind of feelings about herself as Lena, it was strange to see that in the person that was a twelfth level intellect and appeared so confident. The question about Maggie, that wasn't expected, why would Alex have talked about Maggie with her? Was she trying to find out if Alex was dating to see if she could ask her out maybe. Kara felt strangely excited about this, she could see that Alex liked Lex, Lena had said that Lex liked Alex but this was something that she could see. She also seemed to think that it would be better to be unstable than be experiencing a normal human moment. Maybe she could take the emotion out of it for her to explain in a way that Lex could accept.

“No she is not with Maggie, and I am not suggesting this is emotional, whenever there is something that is confusing to me I over think, and well you're a genius your capacity for over thinking is probably exponentially greater than mine. Lena does the same as Alex does, especially when things like an almost kiss happened, you should have seen me after Lena filled my office with flowers. I mean I couldn't concentrate on anything until I spoke to Alex, extensively about it. That actually may be why she was a little nervous when I left. Maybe I should get back to her.”

Lex noticed that there were a number of people now showing interest in Lex Luthor and Supergirl talking, she didn't need any publicity of this discussion or any connection with the super outside of the DEO, her mother would not handle that well, not to mention that this was not a discussion to have with Kara. Although she liked the way that she suggested that what was happening was over thinking, that was something that she was able to understand, she wondered if Alex or Lena had been telling Kara how she thinks? The thought she was over thinking was in some way comforting, she should go to see Lena to get checked out, even if Kara said this was normal, to be fair she was not human, a fact that was emphasised by Kara taking to the sky. Leaving Lex alone with one question on her mind, was Alex thinking about her too?


	42. Alex’s confession

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 20:10………

Alex had waited patiently for Kara to start talking and there was a lot that she would need to think about considering that she had just dropped a bomb on her about the thought of trying Kryptonite on her. To be fair Alex couldn't believe that she had even suggested this, but there were possible benefits to the Kryptonite but she wouldn't allow anything to be used if there was a chance that it could hurt Kara. She wanted to move forward with the project and find things to do with the rocks, what she had seen so far was impressive although worrying. She had not expected Kara to take it well however she had not expected her to just fly off, after all they had always been able to talk even though there had been a number of arguments lately but even then they didn't hide things from each other. She wondered if there was an incident that she wasn't aware of, and turned the news on but there was nothing. Alex started to pace, she didn't want to stop working with Lex, or stop seeing her in general, but she didn't want it to cause a problem with Kara either. She tried to call Kara but the phone went straight to voicemail.

“Hey Kara, there isn't anything on the news and you shot out of here so fast, I guess I hoped that it was an emergency, I am now starting to think that it was me. Me that you wanted to get away from and I can't blame you, I want to explain but maybe I shouldn't have brought this up so soon, but I wanted to make sure that everything stays safe. Kara I get that you need time, but we have always been able to talk, please get back to me.”

Alex waited but there was nothing, no call no text nothing, she was really worried about what was happening with her, she thought about their conversations and she knew that she had messed up. She didn't want to have Kara feel like a guinea pig, she says that the tests and the experiments from when she was growing up felt that way, then the DEO did the same, she didn't want her to think that she was an experiment. She would need to make it up to her and they did have a sister brunch planned for Sunday but she didn't want to leave it that long. They had never left like that without an opening, she must have been really upset. She had to go to bed for her morning meeting with Lena but there was no way that she was going to be able to sleep. She had scanned the news and there was nothing that contained any information about Kara. it wasn't until she made a final check and saw a gossip picture that was highlighted, with Kara and Lex in the park across from the restaurant that Lex eats in. Kara had left to go and confront Lex, she tried to text Lex but there was no response, she was now worried that she had upset Kara and in turn Kara had upset Lex. With no one answering Alex puth the phone down and tossed and turned for a number of hours before she finally fell asleep.

Lena’s office (National City) 23-03-2020 Earth Prime 07:20………

Lena was waiting for Alex, they had planned to have their second meeting this morning, she was excited to get Alex out to the site and get things underway, since the change of contract at the DEO she had been worried about Kara’s safety, even more so than she was when Alex quit, she just wanted to make sure that Kara was safe and protected. She had made sure there was coffee waiting and some doughnuts. She was hoping that she could capitalize on the good feeling from the last meeting. When the door finally knocked Lena looked up to see Alex walking in she was tired and looked stressed, she smiled and then stood up picking up the coffee for Alex and moved towards her.

“Alex, morning, here I have coffee for you, is everything ok?”

Alex’s morning had not gone any better than her night there was still no response from Lex or Kara, she had been tired and drained and even a shower had not woken her, there was no more information about the photo of Kara and Lex and she was starting to feel anxious about the whole situation. There had been a supergirl incident and quite a significant one around nine, which could explain the lack of contact with her sister, but that was a whole other worry, after all she had been out and she had not been there to check on her, that made today's meeting even more important. She had arrived and knocked twice before opening the door. She walked into the office and took the coffee with a half smile as she ran her other hand through her hair and around the back of her neck.

“Yeah, tired and well a little worried, have you heard from Lex or Kara?”

Lena tilted her head as she observed Alex. She looked almost nervous asking was there something going on with Kara and Lexi that she didn't know about? Or were this two separate things? Kara had agreed to meet Lexi but they were not planning on doing that just yet. She hasn't spoken to Lexi following breakfast; she wasn't due to see her again until tomorrow, as for Kara they were meeting up this evening. She picked up her own coffee and motioned to the couch taking a seat with Alex. 

“Well Kara was out with the DEO this morning, according the news, Lexi well you know she isn't much for checking in, she did make her reservation at CharMichaels last night, is everything alright Alex, did something happen yesterday that I should be worried about, is she showing signs of instability?”

Lena was worried now, looking at Alex thinking about the work in the Lab, the last time Alex was worried about Lex she was unstable, very unstable, she had almost completely retreated by the time that Lena got to her. She raised her brow and looked at Alex trying to gage her reaction to the question.

“Alex I am only trying to help her and if there is anything that is happening that my mother can see she could be called in by my mother and she is not someone that takes the word no for an answer, if there is anything she will have Lex picked up and that will result in a very unpleasant set of events for her so please if there is anything Alex tell me.”

Alex had not wanted that, she was concerned for a number of reasons but she didn't think that Lex was about to head back into herself or anything, maybe be a little upset with Lena, and now with her because of Kara. She really liked Lex, damn it she had almost kissed her, and then everything was just drawn to a close, and she was left contemplating the prospect of a one night stand. Something better than nothing although she knew that wasn't really her there had only been Sara, and she didn't know her or like her first but maybe just getting to know what it would be like, what making love to Lex would be like. Well damn it wouldn't be that would it, but then one time would be better than never knowing right? She looked up at Lena.

“There was a moment where we were talking and then she cried and started counting and repeating things, she kept going with the story though trying to stabilize herself but by the end of the story she was almost unable to speak and she was on the floor. She had made me agree to call you if she showed any signs of distress like the Friday before and I thought about it, but I wanted to help so I got down on the floor with her, I wrapped my arms around her and I just held her tight until she calmed down.”

Alex took a swig of the coffee and took a moment she was rambling and she knew it, she was finding that the lack of sleep was making it harder for her to formulate a answer that was concise, because she was invested in Lex, she really liked her, there was no denying it, she wanted to spend time with her, she wanted her to like her back.

“She was alright after that until lunch and there was a sign that she wasn't comfortable, but I held her arm and told her that she didn't need to talk about whatever it was, I can't even remember now. Everything was going great after that until there was a discussion about tech, she wanted to help with the superfriends, I thought that maybe you had told her but then, it became apparent that you had not and that she had worked it out. She seemed to get sad at that point, she thought that I was trying to hide things from her or maybe that I didn't like her or was lying about the fact that I didn't see her as anything other than Lex Luthor, but that couldn't be farther from the truth.”

Alex ran her hand around her neck again and thought about what to say, that was the point at which Alex had almost kissed her the moment that she thought Lex was going to kiss her back. She had frozen but Lex had also and the moment was lost but she was still able to convey that this wasn't the case and that Lex was worth more than that.

“I managed to get her attention placing my hand on her face and getting her to look at me, I pull her from whatever negative place she was going and well there was a point that I leaned in as I was talking to her, and for a moment, well never mind, then she seemed to be ok, and said that she would see me monday. Kara was photographed with her later, I think that me asking about samples and things may have gone well. I think I may have upset Kara and then she was talking to Lex. I can't get hold of either of them and I am worried, we should tell Lex about the project she would be a good tech advisor”

Luckily Lena had a lot of experience with Kara and her rambles and waited at each break for the continuation, she knew that there would be more, although each part that she was given, was more exciting than the one before. Firstly, Alex was the only person that had ever pulled Lexi back from a retreat but her, Alex had been able to get close to her and hold her tight enough to anchor her, and Lexi trusted her enough to come back, the hug wasn't enough Alex must have spoken to her said something that got through to her. Then there were casual touches between them, that Lexi clearly had responded to positively. Even though there were three moments in one day that Lexi had become unstable she had been pulled back each time by Alex, then there was a leaning in, was that an almost kiss? The last thing was a worry, Kara had promised to be on board and she may have gone after Lexi, she picked up her phone and had a look at the picture, Lexi wasn't distressed in the photo, but she sent a quick text.

“I have just texted her, I think that she would be a good addition, but there is a reason that I haven't told her, supers have a negative reaction with Lexi and I wanted to make sure that my treatment was able to keep her stable. Thank you for looking after her yesterday, although I knew that there was a chance that things could be difficult. She was stable when I left her. Kara and I were planning on getting together with Lex at some point so they could spend some time with each other, hoping that they can be around each other. Um, so I have questions about what you were discussing but, you leaned in? Were you planning on kissing her?”

Alex knew that she had an issue and why, that was part of the conversation that had caused the biggest issue during the day and well she also understood, and knew she held the same kind of issue for Lex. She couldn't help but wonder if she had mentioned getting together with Kara to Lex, she wasn't sure that Lex was on board with that much super in her life, but then she was just talking to her in the park. Why was Lena interested in the almost Kiss, why was she not more interested in what was going on with Lex. She knew that her and Lena were not in the place to chat girl talk, that was something that they had done some time ago, never quite like this though, but that was before they were talking but they were not back there. This kind of girl talk was something that she did with Kara, and that was awkward at the best of time, she had not even discussed this with her, the last time this happened was with Lex, she had sat chatting about Maggie, and that was before she spoke to Kara. could she talk about this with Lena?

“Look it was an in the moment thing, we were having a good day there were a number of moments through the day that well were almost intimate, and yes there was a moment that I leaned in, it wasn't like I was feeling sorry for her, I mean she was sad but it wasn't that, so I took her face yes, but when she looked at me and her breath hitched I just felt something and I leaned, but I stopped myself. I am not trying to upset or hurt her Lena. I know that she is a person that doesn't do relationships, and that she didn't like to see anyone more than once, and although a part of me thinks I could be ok with that, I want to work on this project with her, I like having her around and I can’t have both.”

Had Alex Danvers just admitted to contemplating a one night stand with her sister, but wanting her to be in her life longer than one night? She just admitted out loud to liking Lexi, maybe she wasn't so far from understanding her feelings as Kara thought she was, and she wanted Lena to know that she was not out for her, she wanted her on side, this was something new, maybe there had been movement between them, was Alex softening? This was definitely not how she was expecting the day to go. But it did sound like she wasn't going to push anything, she was just as bad as Kara, not wanting to risk something, not that she was any better but on this occasion she wasn't the one that was oblivious. Lexi liked her a lot, maybe this would be something that would turn into something more than just one night, it seemed like that was something that Lexi was thinking about. Her phone beeped and she looked at the message that it was nothing bad, actually Kara had saved her life. She was in the lab working and everything was fine.

“Alex as much as I feel the need to tell you that if you hurt my sister, I will think up something beautifully poetic to exact my revenge for hurting her. You can take that as a threat or a promise. I don't care which one. However right now I am more interested in you knowing that I am grateful for you looking after her, there are not many people who she trusts enough to get close to her, which has gotten worse since she came back into my life. Last night after she finished dinner Kara saved her life, and they chatted. She said everything was fine and she would see me tomorrow. Now I knew that you liked her the other day when she was quiet and well you were anxious. You like her don't you? I mean really like her?”

Alex remembered those words, they were Lex’s about the revenge that she had taken against Kara, she raised her brow, clearly Lex and Lena were just as close and Kara she had known this but the evidence was overwhelming at this moment, not only had she given her the shovel talk but she was showing that her Lex talked to her too, does that mean that Lex talks about her? Kara had saved her last night, was that why Kara had flown off so fast? Was that where she went, did that mean that Kara was not mad at her. Alex was grateful for that and the information that Lex was ok.

“I am glad that she is ok, I couldn't get hold of her last night after I saw the photo, and I thought that talking to Kara about the tests to see if we could have some blood, and maybe some tests later to check that on the kryptonite and we can test at another time. Then when Kara took off without a word I thought that I had upset her, then the photo with Lex I thought that she had gone after her. I was so worried that Lex would have been caught off guard and after a difficult day she may decide not to continue with our work. If I only get to see her in the lab I don't want to lose that, because she is amazing and fun and so smart and beautiful and I like her alot, I mean she is a genius and could change the world, she is a good person. I just wish that she believed that.”

Shit, oh damn that was way too much information why she had just shared that, Alex was not normally so loose with her lips, she didn't tell people that kind of thing, it must have been a relief knowing that Lex was ok. She was blushing now, she looked away from Lena and focused on the doughnut, she needed something to focus on that wasn't that she had just poured her heart out to Lex’s sister and her sisters girlfriend. How was she going to manage this, Lena could say something to Kara, she would be upset to hear that she had spoken to Lena. would Lena tell Lex.

“I know that Lex doesn't want to have a relationship and that is not her thing, I will be happy being her friend there is no need to tell her anything and well Kara I will talk to myself”

Lena could see that Alex had not meant to say that, she was embarrassed to have blurted that out, and she was thinking about Lexi too. She knew that she had difficulties with relationships, Lena knew that too it was the way that Lexi constantly put herself in the place where she feels that she is unable to feel emotion but she knew that was not true. She also knew how much Lexi liked her. This just fueled her desire to help them, and if Kara had already talked to Lexi maybe there would be more hope that they could work together to help these two helpless oblivious women find the kind of happiness that they had. She couldn't wait to see Kara later.

“I won't say anything to Lexi, but Alex I wouldn't count her out yet, you already know she is not what she appears, she is not what she appears to herself either, and well I think that you are helping her see that.”


	43. Kara’s confusion

Above CharMichaels (National City) 22-03-2020 Earth Prime 21:40………

Kara had every intention of going back to Alex, she had torn out of there without a word and she didn't want to leave it with Alex thinking that there was an issue. Since talking to Lex she was also in a hurry to head to Alex and talk to her sister about the conversation she was sure that Lex was having feelings for her however she experienced them and well, she was sure that Alex liked Lex after all she had asked for samples and then she pulled up short. Alex had also suggested that she use the kryptonite on her, like some experiment. She was torn at that moment, she wanted to see Alex but this was Kryptonite and she knew that she had very strong reactions to the thought of it existing at all. She had almost lost Lena over her reaction to it once, and she didn't want there to be something like that between her and Alex, not ever. She needed to think about that, she knew that Alex would expect a conversation and her information about Lex would be enough to delay that conversation.

She turned from the direction she was facing and floated up higher past the clouds to where it was quiet she needed to think about this. She wasn't all that comfortable with what Lex and Alex were doing, she would trust that he sister wouldn't allow anything to happen to her DNA but the other thing. Testing kryptonite on her?? Well she didn't want to be a lab rat, she hated that whenever anything went wrong people took the opportunity to run countless tests on her. Then there was the fear, what did Alex say? it wouldn't have a physical effect maybe psychological, that was more terrifying, what if there was something in Lex’s lab that was worse than red K. She couldn't help the small whining sound that came from her as she remembered what that was like. Hurting Alex speaking to people the way that she did, throwing Cat over the balcony, there was just one error, one mean thing after another, the only thing she was thankful for was that she didn't kill anyone. What if the worst thing was the thing that turned her into a homicidal kryptonian, Rao knows that it was possible Non had no qualms about killing humans.

Why would Alex want to risk that, she said that the lab was secure, that even Kara wouldn't be able to get in, and if she did the samples would be inert? How could that be possible, she remembered every time they had to pull Kryptonite out of her the serums, the bullets, all the things that knocked her out and burned through her system. Was there some kind of antidote made from the rocks that Lex had, was Alex suggesting that she submitted to the test and the removal, how many samples were there and how many times would it need to be stripped. How much pain did her sister want her to endure to further this research. Since when had any research been more important than her? Was Lex somehow influencing her? Controlling her did the truth seeking rock have other effects that Alex wasn't aware of. Then she remembered the look on Lex’s face, she wouldn't want to hurt Alex, Kara was not sure of much right now but that look was unmistakable; it was so familiar even if it was on the wrong Luthor's face.

The thought of Lena made her smile, she could go and talk to Lena, get some advice, Lena knew everyone in the equation, she understood science so well, and maybe she would be able to look at the research and let her know if this was something that she should even consider. Then she remembered that Lex said that she was going to see Lena, she couldn't go there just yet, not if Lex was getting a treatment, Lena had been so worried last time there was a need for treatment, she didn't want to add to that. She drifted to her apartment and started to pace. This kind of decision needed these kinds of thoughts needed there to be someone to bounce off someone to discuss it with. It would normally be Alex, it would normally be Lena, but neither were appropriate right now. She pulled out her phone, maybe she could talk to Nia? Brainy? As she looked at the phone she saw that there was a message.

“Hey Kara, there isn't anything on the news and you shot out of here so fast, I guess I hoped that it was an emergency, I am now starting to think that it was me. Me that you wanted to get away from and I can't blame you, I want to explain but maybe I shouldn't have brought this up so soon, but I wanted to make sure that everything stays safe. Kara I get that you need time, but we have always been able to talk, please get back to me.”

Rao Alex sounded worried and a little panicked. She thought that Kara had wanted to get away from her, that she had bolted, she was clearly worried and Kara could hear she wanted to explain, that suggested there was no chance that what happened with Lex would distract her. She wasn't ready to talk about it but she should go and see Alex. She looked at the time for the first time since Alex returned from the Lab and realised it was already one AM. Shoot, it was late, too late to call anyone too late, to go to Alex. Maybe it was best to just try and get some sleep for a bit, she tossed and turned unable to sleep, she focused on Lena’s heart, slow and steady just beating rhythmically like the perfect music, it calmed her frazzled edges, it pull the jostling and raw nerve endings in the way only Lena could. She listened until she was calm and started to drift off not for long enough though. She was woken by a call about a hostile that the DEO needed support with.

Kara suited up and headed out, she was at the DEO in minutes and landed in the control room, she moved over to where Brainy and Vasques were. She was debriefed and was told that they needed her, on the outskirts of the city, that the Hostile was making a direct line for the city and they had not been able to even slow it. She nodded as she was told what they needed from her, the first thing was to draw it away, changed its trajectory and then take it down. Kara looked at the screen, it was a big alien, she had no idea what it even was let alone what powers it could have. 

“As far as we can tell this is some kind of armour, it is interfering with the scans, there seems to be a lack of thought, just reactions and instincts, we don't know what it wants or where it is going, but we have had no luck with standard weapons. It is strong but with no fitness, it is clumsy and well lost potentially. As for powers it has not displayed any as yet, but then it has not needed any”

Brainy played the footage, the alien just seemed to batter things out of the way, weapons having no effect it didn't seem to need to do much other than swat the cars, the helicopter and the agents out of the way as it continued. Luckily it didn't seem fast. Kara took off towards the hostile it was easily three times bigger than she was as she flew in ready for a fight the most unexpected thing seemed to happen, the alien seemed to fixate on her and there seemed to be a smile on its face. Kara pulled up hovering in front of the alien who tried to grab her, she moved back and it seemed to frown, she watched as the eyes seemed to track her and she started to move around, the alien turned away from the city. This seemed a little easy, not that she was complaining but it didn't seem all that hostile. The alien kept trying to grab her so she kept floating back out of reach.

She had kept up the distance and watched as it seemed to continue to stumble forward and swipe at her trying to catch her, it was like watching a child trying to catch a firefly. She continued to weave and move around leading it further away, it was making the most unusual noises, if she didn't know better she would have been convinced it was a laugh or giggle. She couldn't help but wonder just what this was, but one thing for sure was that it wasn't fully grown. It was like a child, she didn't want to hurt the Alien, but she couldn't let it continue to the city. As she pulled it further away closer to the desert she realised it seemed to be getting tired, and slowing down. She watched as it let out a strange cry, then there was a rumble and noise that was in the distance, Kara turned just in time to see two smaller aliens that looked the same growing exponentially as they ran towards her. Her eyes comically wide as there were now three of them was this a trap.

She didn't get to think much on that as suddenly there was a hand dripping her and pulling her in, she was struggling to breath with the pressure that was being displayed, the two larger aliens converged and there was a flutter of fire the bigger aliens taking up positions, one seemed to be sheltering the smaller one she was being crushed by and then the other taking out the oncoming agents. She was trying to get out of the grip which was both crushing and could only be described as a hug, a fleeting thought went to if that was what it was like to be hugged by her. She prised herself out and floated up, the smaller alien crying out and reaching for her. The guarding alien spun looking at the smaller one, and pulled it to her, cradling it, as it reached out for Kara. There was a familiar look of the larger aliens face and that's when it hit her, this was a lost child, and these others were its parents. She moved in front of the other alien and hovered to its side.

“Stop wait, this is a mistake, stand down”

The largest alien turned to look at Kara, her answering smile was soft and the guns turned quiet. She moved closer to the largest alien and held out her hands in a sign of calm and smiled, she hoped that she recognised the look correctly, she had seen the same protective look on Lena, Lex and Alex, and even more fiercely on Eliza, she wanted to calm the situation. She moved around and got closer to the smallest who pulled her back in and smiled making soft noises, as it calmed the alien and started to reduce in size. The other aliens seemed to start to shrink back too. They ended in a small circle, the smallest alien now clearly a child.

“Thank you, great and noble El, We are sorry for the commotion, we are only on earth as a stop, we were told that we could get the information that we needed and then we could continue, we didn't mean to cause a problem.”

Kara was surprised that the alien knew who she was and greeted her using both of her house titles, she should know the species if they know Kryptonians. But this was not any alien that she recognised, almost as if seeing her confusion he pressed a concealed button and the armour retracted showing the man underneath. Kara gasped as she looked at the face before her.

“You're a Xoeraniam, I thought that your people were gone? You were Legends on Krypton.”

“Yes, we all are, we are here looking for you, We were told that there was a member of the great and noble house here on Earth, that you survived, your history holds the last piece of the puzzle that we need to find our home world.”

Kara talked to him for a long while before she was able to understand, she knew exactly what they needed once they were finished and was able to give them the missing piece. It was a small part of an ancient star chart that was part of the Rao origin myth. She was able to remember it from her childhood and hovered before using her heat vision to map it out on the desert floor. She escorted them back to their ship; they were able to scan her heat signature and implement it to return home. Kara remembered about Alex in that moment, she knew that she was going to be with Lena, but she was ready to talk to her, seeing the protectiveness within the Xoeraniam had reminded her of the one thing she knew to be true, Alex would protect her with her life, she would listen to her and if Alex wanted her to do this she would but not before she understood. What the process would be, and she would want Lena there too. She pulled out her phone and messaged Alex.

Secret super friends base 22-03-2020 (earth prime) - 10:30

Alex and Lena had left for the base the drive was quiet and although Lena didn't mind the quiet necessarily it wasn't comfortable, she contemplated breaking the silence a number of times, there were things running through her head. The way that Alex seemed to be drawn to Lexi was interesting, considering her initial feelings on her, and the fact that she was working with her in the lab, was unexpected to say the least. The thing that was most curious was the fact that Lexi seemed to be so comfortable with her so quickly, there was a million things that she wanted to ask but she knew that they were not there yet, she wasn't sure if they would ever get back to being friends, and Lena understood that, she would never be able to forgive herself for what she did to Kara, why should Alex. there was also the information about Kara, something happened between them that had Kara ghosting Alex, and that never happened. She couldn't help but think that it was a reaction to the information about Kryptonite, Kara’s reactions were always so strong, but she already knew about it. She worried about her bottom lip, wondering if it was her again, something about their relationship, but then there was also the information about Kara and Lex, she wondered what that had to do with things. There was so much left unsaid so much that Lena didn't know about and she wasn't sure how much that she would be allowed to be privy to.

“You’re thinking so loud that it's actually giving me a headache”

“Alex, I know you don't trust me and we are not friends any more, I understand that, and I don’t want to over step. I was just wondering, could we put a pin in the evil Luthor thing for a moment, do you think that you could think back to a time that you didn't hate me so we can talk. I guess the things you have said today have given me a lot to think about. It would be helpful to be able to talk not just for me, but for you too”

Alex looked at her for a moment, she was looking at her in a different way, she was really trying to let the mask down and be open, there was a glimmer of something in her eyes, something that Alex had not seen for a long time in the woman, a softness a vulnerability, hope? How did Alex feel about her, she wasn't wrong, they were not friends, but she was trying, they were going to be working together and Lena was with her sister. She looked into the eyes glistening with so much hope and bit her lip hard as she contemplated it.

“I don't hate you Lena, we were friends, we are not there, but it does seem that the world is throwing us together, personally and professionally, I can't say that I trust you but, I can see that you are trying to protect Kara, that all of this is to make sure she is safe, and I can't fault you for that. How about we try, talking but I am not promising hugs and coffee at noonans, I am not Kara and it takes me longer to get there ok”

Lena smiled and looked at her, it wasn't eness, it wasn't trust but it was honest and with a possibility of a more workable relationship. She nodded and looked at her. What to talk about first? Both of the women's phones seemed to ping at the same time. Lena looked at hers, it was a message from Kara saying that she was ok, and that she forgot to ask her to get some samples for Alex. Lena looked up at Alex who had a small frown on her face and was not quite as happy with her message.

“Kara messaged, she is ok, although it looks as though your message is less comforting, what happened between you two?”

“I got over excited about the work with Lex and well, I may have gone a little far, I asked her about some samples to test the rocks, I may have mentioned that we would like to test some on her too in the future, but I didn't explain or have time to because she shot off at speed, and has not contacted me until now. She said she wants to know everything and wants you to be there, so everyone is on the same page. The message is cold.”

Alex handed the phone to Lena so she could see what she meant and lena read what was there, Kara had rambled over the text as she does in person, she could see what Alex meant though although the message was not as bad as the conversation that she had with her when she made Kryptonite, but there was still a bite. She handed the phone back.

“You were there when she apologised to me, when she explained how the kryptonite makes her scared that she will not be enough and people will get hurt. What you were not there for was Kara telling me what Kryptonite feels like when it is affecting her, or what it feels like when it's removed. Testing them on her would mean removing them, and that is almost as painful as the exposure itself.”

“But Lex can neutralize it with the opposite colour, it shouldn't hurt at all, and I wouldnt do anything that would hurt her.”

Lena reached out and placed her hand on Alex’s forearm, she was not sure that it would be accepted but when Alex didn't instantly pull away she felt that this was progress. She smiled at her and gave her a squeeze, her voice came out soft and with so much care, Alex may not like her, but she had always liked and admired the older Danvers woman, part of that was because of just how much she cared for Kara, how could she not, anyone protecting her love is worth their weight in gold.

“Kara knows that logically, but she does not react to Kryptonite logically, always emotionally. She is willing to talk, and that is a start Alex, she has not said no, she hasn't asked for it to be destroyed, and she is considering it, trust me that is big, and the reason for this is her love and trust in the person that makes her feel like she belongs, her personal hero, you Alex.”

“Thank you Lena, Let's have a look at what you have created to keep our girl safe”

Lena couldn't help it, that one sentence made her heart swell, Alex may not be there yet but that was such a leap forward, she sighed softly as the car stopped.


	44. The yellow brick road

Lena’s Penthouse 22-03-2020 (earth prime) - 18:30

Kara arrived at the penthouse in some faded apple bottom jeans and an oversized t-shirt that was drifting off one shoulder exposing a sinful amount of skin, the collar bones, neck and shoulder, and the amazing bicep on the tanned arm. Lena’s brain had almost flatlined at the way she looked, how was it that she was just so effortlessly ethereal and stunning, Lena smiled and pulled her into a hug. Their date night this week was a simple night in, with some movies and take out just the two of them. They had more extravagant dates, but this was perfect, sometimes Lena just wanted to be herself and have Kara relaxed and comfortable, a time to forget the Luthor Super dynamics and just be Kara and Lena, Lena had dressed similarly and very comfortable. The embrace was soft and all encompassing Lena melted into her, for the first time all day she felt completely relaxed and calm. She pulled back enough to kiss her softly.

“Mmmmm I am never going to get tired of that greeting, Lena you look beautiful.”

“Thank you, you as always look amazing, now how about we go create a nest, and we can just veg out”

Kara couldn't help the way that it made her feel having Lena say something so un Luthor like, hell it made her practically swoon, she started to grab snacks and things from the kitchen and headed into the living area, and stilled. She looked at the scene in front of her, there was never anything more perfect, Lena must have raised the nearest soft furnishings store, there were cushions, throws, pillows blankets, all soft and colourful littering the floor, it looked like something from Aladdin's cave. The bright colours were in contrast to Lena’s normal design but they were just like Kara’s loft, she couldn't help but smile. Lena had done this for her; she started to place the items around with a massive smile on her face.

Lena came back from the door with the take away she had gone to get the door as Kara was raiding her cupboards, she was glad that she had them restocked so that there was enough to feel her appetite for sweet things during movies. She watched with a soft expression as Kara seemed to falter when she saw the area, and then set about making the area perfect. She loved her more than she could ever express but she hoped that this would show her that Lena wanted her to see this, her penthouse as a home for Kara, she wanted to give Kara more reason to be there to feel comfortable, she was hoping that Kara would be happy feeling this space was safe and then maybe even move in, she bit her lip, she knew it was too soon but she hoped that it would happen maybe a little naturally if she made her feel at home. She slipped into the room and moved her hands around her waist and turned her head to rest on the bare shoulder. She placed a soft kiss to the offered flesh and sighed constantly.

“I thought that since you agreed to come to my place, I would try and make it a little more homely. I want you to be comfortable here, Do you like it?”

Kara could hear the nerves in Lena’s voice, the tentative question that slipped past her lips, the way she was always so unsure, even now. Kara knew that there was always going to be a hurt edge to Lena, that there was always going to be the shadow of her life colouring her confidence in these settings, it amazed her that this was never evident in her dealings as a CEO. then it made sense she thought to herself, she was pushed to be strong and confident and to take charge, but at the same time she was always belittled and made to feel like she wasn't personally worth more than she could do for them. She had not had love, not true love and well it was something that Kara wanted to change.

“Lena like you everything here is perfect, you know that when you do things like this, it makes my heart melt, it's so effortlessly thoughtful, just like you, we can make a little fort and snuggle up close”

They had eaten and watched movies snuggled together, the conversation had been easy and the silences too, they shared hugs and kisses and now Kara was curled up head on Lena’s stomach. Lena was smoothing through her hair and looking at her, not really paying attention to the movie, Kara had a crinkle between her brows although there was still a smile on her face. There was something playing on her mind even if she was trying to push it to the side not to ruin their night. Lena loved the way that Kara could completely relax, but she could see that she wasn't all the way there tonight, she sighed softly and using her thumb and finger tilted Kara's head towards her face.

“You know whatever is playing on your mind I am here to listen, sharing whatever the burden is, I can hug, kiss away and help with anything that is on your mind, you know that you're not alone any more, I am here for you Kara.”

Kara looked into Lena’s expectant face, it was soft and full of concern and she couldn't hold it in any longer she had been trying to, she wanted Lena’s thoughts on it but at the same time she knew that Lena loved her sister and this was going to be a little awkward. She still didn't trust her but she didn't think that Lex was particularly Evil. she bit her lip and looked into the eyes shining down at her and nodded.

“I, um I didn't want to ruin our night, I didn't want you to think that I am going to go after Lex, and I am sure you saw the photos of us in the park it um, it wasn't what you think…….. I promised you I wouldn't hurt her and agreed to meet her but I know that you didn't want that to happen just yet, and I didnt go behind your back, it was just that, well I didn't know who I was saving…….. I'm not that I would have not if I did you know um, Rao i am not explaining myself…... Um and then it was Lex and she was rambling about how Alex almost kissed her, and that she seems to really like Alex, and wants more than just a one night thing but doesn't want to hurt her. And then well there was Alex, and she wants to test Kryptonite on me, the stuff that Lex is making and I just Rao lena, it scared me, I know you said that Lex isn't out to get me but its, its Kryptonite and she had alex working on it, and I don't know what is happening, Alex has protected me so long, now she wants to put me in danger, and well it's something to do with Lex, and well it doesn't make sense, I know Alex likes her, but still this is so out of character.”

Lena watched as Kara rambled at a pace that was faster than her normal, she was worried, scared and clearly concerned about a number of things, Lena couldn't help but place her hand onto her face and give her a small and soothing kiss as she stopped her ramble. She thought to the information that she had, that Alex had asked her to keep to herself. Her and Kara had talked about the possibility that their sisters liked each other, both of them pretty sure that it was the case. However Alex’s information was a declaration that was private, she could only say so much about that without betraying Alex. they were not friends again but she hoped that there was some thoring after all she was hoping that one day they would be family. She understood of course, she had hurt Kara, but at the same time, she had done everything that she could to apologize and make up for that. She hoped that keeping this to herself was a way to show that she was someone who had Alex’s back. Keeping it from Kara however, that broke their pact of trust. She smiled softly and rested their heads together.

“Ok so first, we knew that there was something brewing between Alex and Lexi, we talked about that, I am a little surprised that Lexi is thinking about something more, although Alex does seem to have an inexplicable impact on her. As for what did you almost kiss, maybe you should speak to Alex about that, I mean there must be something more there for Alex if she was about to kiss Lexi. you know that we can hypothesize about it until the end of time but only Alex can tell you what she was or is thinking.”

Lena ran through that, she felt that it was enough to get Kara to talk to Alex, without giving anything away, she didn't like that it wasn't a complete truth but it was a hard line to walk at this moment. She then thought about Kara’s anxiety around her and Lexi.

“Secondly, thank you for saving Lexi, whether you knew it was her or not. I know that I have been keeping you apart, but that is because I want to give Lexi time to acclimate, she is not comfortable with change and there is a lot going on, supers do pose a problem, but I don't want you to think that you talking to her, changes how I feel about you, you said you wouldn't hurt her, and I believe you.”

The last thing was a lot more difficult for Lena, she didn't like Kryptonite any more than Kara did, she knew that Lexi was working on it and she knew Alex was helping, the security was amazing and Lex had shown her what she had so far it was truly amazing stuff but, there was always that worry in the back of her mind.

“Kara, I have seen the lab, the Kryptonite storage is safer than anything that I have ever seen. She is doing everything in her power to ensure that everything is contained and tested. If the tests are what I think it is connected to rocks that have abilities to help but no physical effects on Kryptonians. She promised me that no matter what it could do, if there was any effect on you she wouldn't use it.”

Kara had felt calmer the moment that Lena had kissed her, then the words how could she not love this woman more, she was encouraging her to talk to Alex about it, to put her mind at rest at the source, of course that was what she needed to do, she had planned to talk to Alex about the experiments, but Lena was right the Lex situation needed to be discussed. She smiled softly and listened when Lena thanked her and told her she believed her, things had moved on, and she was so happy. Then she could hear the heart beating faster, she knew that Lena was worried about Kryptonite, she had not wanted to make any but as she spoke about Lex’s precautions she slowed, her face was sure.

“I wouldn't let anyone hurt you, losing Lex would hurt you, and I wouldn't let that happen, I think your right I do need to talk to Alex about that, and the experiments, I said that you would give her some of the blood we collected, and she asked if she could have it monday, um I will need help to cut my hair for the hair sample though. I understand that they are trying to do something good for the world but it just, it's Kryptonite Lena and it scares me.”

Lena pulled her into her lap, wrapping her arms and legs around her, as Kara seemed to fall into her, her head nestled into her neck shaking slightly. She couldn't think of another time that Kara had seemed so small but there was nothing that she loved more than the fact that through everything they still got to have this, to be so vulnerable with each other. That Kara trusted her enough to be this open, it warmed her heart and she turned her head a little to kiss her temple.

“You know tomorrow is Sunday, its sister's brunch day, I can talk to Lexi and see what the experiments are that she is planning and then we can look at other precautions so that I can be involved to make safeguards. I also want to talk to her about the superfriends project, Alex thinks that she can help but I won't if you're uncomfortable. Lex will wait, the good thing about it is that until it is out in the open, Lex won't take her lack of knowledge personally, so she won't be hurt by me keeping it quiet. While I am doing that you can talk to Alex. you're never happy when you and Alex are struggling, that mind wipe period you just never seemed like yourself, your smiles did not reach your eyes, and I was sure that when Alex got your movie wrong on game night you were going to cry. Alex is important and you need to deal with this ok”

“Rao that was the worst, it was like she hated half of me, and she couldnt spend time with me, it was just always so awkward, and I felt so alone, when she forgot so much about Kara I realised just how much of me is connected to who I really am you know, the think with the movie, you know why it is my favorite right”

Lena just nodded into the side of her head, she remembered that Kara had explained how that was a comfort to her, in understanding her emotions, understanding the way she felt being torn from her life, feeling that she didn't belong where she found herself. How she felt like Dorothy and how her making friends with others in Oz had given her hope that someday, somehow she would find people that helped her feel happy again. She remembered how she spoke about Alex and that she wasn't friendly with her and then slowly she made Kara feel like she belonged and that she was the first person to take some of the pain away. Lena knew that feeling too, for her it was Lexi, Lexi had been the one to take away that fear, that feeling that she didn't belong and give her something to hold on to. Lexi was her light as much as Alex was Kara’s

“You know that my memory isn't quite as good as Lexi’s but there is nothing about you that I have forgotten Kara, you are everything to me, and you have given me something that I have not had for so long. Lexi made me feel like I belonged just as Alex did for you. Now you have given me a home for my heart, and I want more than anything for you and Lexi and Alex and I to get along, I know it is going to take time but I have hope that it will work out, I have hope because of you.”

Kara pulled back and could see the emotions running in Lena’s eyes. She knew of course that Lex had been the one that had saved what she could of Lena childhood, she knew that Lena understood being pulled from her life and deposited into something else, and she knew that the something else was horrible and traumatising. However there was something in the look in her eyes in that moment that seemed to transport Kara’s mind to a small girl being dragged into a massive mansion, with a harsh and unforgiving woman taking the place of her loving mother, going from the brightness of love to the harsh and dark world of the Luthors. For the first time it seemed like she truly understood what that meant and how much Lex meant to her. Lex was truly Lena’s Alex and the years that she was missing left scars of Lena, she understood that with Alex’s wipe and couldn't imagine how much it would have hurt her if Alex had been gone as long as Lex had been.

“You are so strong Lena, you have lived through so many hardships, I will always be here for you, and I will do everything I can to understand and connect with Lex, she is important to you so she is important to me. I will help you protect her too.”

Tears slipped from Lena’s eyes as she looked at Kara. The woman had literally just given her everything that she could have ever wanted without knowing that she wanted it. She moved forward and started to kiss her, the night slowly descended into something less soft, and much more passionate. They breathed life into each other, a new level of understanding of need. Lena pulled at Kara’s oversized t-shirt and soon had her laying back amongst the cushions, they were needy and hungry, nipping and kissing, any available skin as their hands pulled and fought with the clothes they were still wearing. Soon there was a mass of hair, limbs, hungry moaning breaking into the silence of the penthouse. When they finally managed to slip their hands between each other and started to greedily pump into each other the moans grew. Rocking together as they continued to bring each other to the brink. It wasn't elegant, it wasn't soft, but it was exactly right as they both screamed out bodies shuddering to a stop as they came hard together in amongst the madd of blankets and pillows.

“Wow, Lena that was, unbelievable”

“Round two, in the bedroom, I have a new toy to try”

The look on her face and the raised brow was all that Kara needed to scoop her up and carry her to the bedroom, the closeness and understanding bringing them just that little bit closer. It was very late, or maybe very early when they finally collapsed together curling into each other and Kara covered them with a blanket as Lena’s soft breathing and steady heart pulled her to sleep.


	45. Pancakes and sticky buns

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Lena’s Penthouse 23-03-2020 (earth prime) - 10:30

Lex arrived at the penthouse as always exactly on time, she was meticulous in her planning and execution of her schedule she lifted her hand and watched for the thirty seconds to count down to her knock, ass the final second ticked she rapped on the door, which opened immediately, she moved forward and gave her sister a hug, it was customary and well there was something about hugging Lena that always put her at ease. It Was always a strong and definite embrace, not as hard as when Lex was not well but strong nonetheless. She stepped back and smiled at her sister, her brow raised slightly.

“You know I am sure that you were waiting for me to knock on the other side of the door.”

Lena smiled brightly. She had been waiting for Lexi, she knew the way her sister was that she would be knocking at exactly ten thirty even if she was there a minute or two early. Lena had indeed been waiting on the other side of the door, she wouldn't open until Lex knocked, she didn't want to startle her or change the routine but she was eager to see her today. She blushed lightly as she had been caught, she always waited eagerly on the other side of the door, and getting to spend time on sunday with Lexi was always her favorite thing to do, since they had been reunited she was able to have her sister in her life more freely than before and she was reveling in the warmth of her sister. Lexi may reject the thought of all things emotional but the way Lena felt in the presence of her was nothing other than loved. Plus today she was excited and a little nervous about talking to her.

“Well yes I was, I want to talk to you about something and well I have missed you, I think that we should get brunch started and then we can talk, Pancakes again?”

“Now you know that sunday is pancakes day, and I have yet to see you manage a spin flip. I have something to talk to you about too, and well I am sure that you will be interested.”

Lena smiled and headed into the kitchen she had already made the batter and was ready to make the pancakes, she had fruit cut and all the syrups ready, she was fully prepared for Lexi’s arrival, she was interested to know what Lexi has to say, she was sure that it would be about the tests in connection to the kryptonite but she wouldn't let her anxiety make Lexi feel that she didn't support her, what ever Lexi was doing would be brilliant. Lena started with Flipping and preparing some basic pancakes, she was monitoring the consistency and the thickness she needed the pancake to be heavy enough to flip but not so heavy that it dropped too fast, she was sure now of how much she needed and stepped back a little to give herself enough room.

“Ready to be amazed Lexi”

Lexi took position and watched Lena, she flipped a few easily clearly practicing, Lena was preparing to try a spin, Lex couldn't help but wonder if she had been secretly practicing the movements she seemed much more fluid than she was last time. Lex watched the pancake mix change and the way that Lena watched with intent at the spin and the speed, she was clearly monitoring the mix and the timings, Lex watched closer, her brow lifted and a small quirk on her lips, the mix looked good, Lena would need more space, as she moved back Lex watched, as sht pancake left the pan and Lena started to spin she could see that Lena was going to make it. She grinned and congratulated her before the pancake landed. There was excited laughter from Lena that made Lex’s heartbeat a little quicker for a moment and then she moved around the island.

“You have been practicing, that was perfect. So shall we take these to eat and you can tell me what it is that you have on your mind.”

Lena had preened at the praise she couldn't help it, she had so little of it as a child that anything that she was offered always gave her a boost, grabbing the food they moved to the dining room and sat down with all the trimmings to eat. She handed over the items that she knew Lexi would need, and they moved together through the prep and to anyone else it would look like this was a domestic moment, but it was practiced Lena knew what Lex would need by order and would do anything to put her at ease in this moment.

“Well I have been worried about Kara, the work at the DEO, the forms that have been sent to you for signing, I don't think that she is safe, there is still a request for her identity. As such I have set up an organisation to help her, to ensure that she has back up but not from the government, Alex and a number of others will be heading up the team, there are training and medical facilities and Alex will be helping. I know that you will be happy without her at the DEO but I want you and her to get to know each other. Without the chaos that comes with the DEO. I would like your help with it if you are interested Lexi”

Lex had already worked this out to a degree but was happy to hear it directly from Lena, after all she did have some idea that would help but didn't want to be involved in anything further. The DEO took enough of her time out of her lab, she would have liked to change this earth to be more accommodating of her own interests but she didn't have enough of the book, or the page that still sat in her safe. She looked at Lena and nodded, to show her that she had understood. The idea of spending time with Kara wasn't something that she was particularly looking forward to but it was inevitable, with the plans she had, working with Alex and with Lena dating her.

“I am more than happy to lend some inventions, I had already mentioned them to Alex but she was not willing to take them until we had spoken. I do not want to be involved with the team itself, I think the less I know the better in that respect, however I am happy to create some additions for the defense. As for Kara, I saw her the other night, she rambles and speaks so unfocused that I have no idea what she is thinking, and I have understood what she has said way before she finishes talking, I have no idea how you manage with it. I can see there is intelligence under all that polyester but she hides it all in fluffy happiness and rambling that just takes so long to cut through. I can see why you like her though, so I will make time to meet her and spend time with her”

Lena watched Lexi and couldn't help but feel the love radiating from her heart towards her sister. She was going to help, she was going to meet with Kara, this was easier than she thought, but then she was well aware that Lex had an ulterior motive too. That this would have been a much different discussion if Lexi didn't have a vested interest in what Kara could provide. Not that Lena believed that Lexi had evil intentions, but she was much easier to agree when there was something that she wanted in return. It was the transnational nature of the Luthor upbringing and she knew that, she couldn't hold it against Lexi, she understood it, and well she had been the same for many years until Kara. if there was anyone that gave something for nothing it was Kara, maybe Alex too to a degree but they were not there yet.

“Maybe she would be happier if she spent time with me to help with my research, I have a number of Kryptonites that have potential revolutionary impacts, I haven't finished the testing yet, but they have no physical effects on Kryptonian DNA as yet, there are more tests to run. There is a style of kryptonite that can give powers to humans, they are not stable, but Clark had experience with them in smallville. This seems to change the Kryptonian DNA but not in a quantifiable way, however it did cause Lois and Clark to switch, Lois gained all of the superpowers and Clark was a human, there are others that seem to have no impact right now but they could affect her psychologically, the resignation of the rocks are closer to the red K style of Kryptonite, but I am not sure what it will do to her. I can neutralise them also so there will be no lasting effects. There is one that could help you with your currently never ending quest to cure cancer, it has a healing application, one that helps with growth of plants and could help with hunger in countries that can't produce enough food. However I have no plans to put something out there that could make her a danger, or him, so I need to be sure that it is safe.”

The conversations continued until Lex had explained the entire process with the testing and Lena had a plan to slowly introduce Kara and Lex. They were both satisfied with the outcome, Lena promising to talk to Kara and they had a plan for the next few months.

Noonans 23-03-2020 (earth prime) - 10:30

At their normal booth in Noonans Kara had a pile of sticky buns and was waiting for her sister. She was nervous, she needed to talk to her about how she was feeling and that she had not meant to run off. She had a good reason and had saved Lex so she hoped that she was going to be able to talk to her without getting defensive, she didn't want anything coming between them, she was already holding back the information from Lex. she needed to hold that for a while, she looked up as the familiar heart beat came in through the door, Alex looked nervous, but instantly relieved when she saw Kara waiting for her. She moved over to the booth and sat down.

“I'm sorry that I didn't explain I am not going to let anything hurt you”

“I'm sorry I ran off there was someone in need, it was Lex and I didnt come back because I was a little upset about the stones.”

Alex laughed lightly as they spoke at the same time, clearly they both wanted to be clear that they didn't want to hurt each other, and that they were here to sort this out. Alex didn't want to do anything that would ever hurt or lose her sister, but the findings so far pointed towards some amazing possibilities. Alex watched as Kara picked up and handed over a sticky bun, the unspoken, I love you and I accept your apology written in sticky sweet goodness. She smiled and took it, ripping it in half and handed the bigger to Kara, an acknowledgement and an I love you too from Alex. Kara’s love language had been food since she arrived on Earth, she ate like she was a bottomless pit. Alex smiled softly and then took a bite, there was an easy silence between them until Kara asked the question that she knew would be coming.

“So tests? Experiments? Kara the lab rat? Tell me what is it that you want to do to me?” 

“It is not like that, we are testing everything on DNA. Lex already has an idea about what it will affect based on the vibrations, and anything that has a physical effect on you is stored very securely. It is the ones that have no known effects, Lex believes they may affect your emotions or psychology.”

Kara’s eyes went wild, she remembered what she was like on Red K, how she was mean and cruel, she had hurt Alex and been insufferable, she had done so much damage to the city, to her friendships and relationships. She just didn't want to have to ever take a trip down that road again. Why would Alex want to risk that what was so special about the rocks that would make Alex even consider testing something that could unleash a super powered menace on a national city? What if it didn't just bring to the surface what was in her, what if it made her dark.

“Alex that red K was worse than green it made me dangerous and it hurt so much to get it out, not to mention the damage I did, you know how hard that was for me why would you want to see what else could be brought out of me, why would you want to put me back in that place where I could hurt someone I love, where I could be a monster?”

Alex knew that Kara still regretted her actions even though they were not her fault, she could see the panic in her eyes and hear the emotions in her voice. She moved around and put her arms around her sister pulling her close to her, she needed to comfort her before she explained more, although she hoped the explanation would help with that too, she held Kara tight until she had calmed down.

“The rocks neutralise each other, so there will be no need to hit you with antidotes for starters, there shouldn't be any pain, I wouldn't do anything to hurt you. The plan is to find the rocks that can help us, there are some that help plants grow, help people heal and there are many other applications we have not finished with yet, we plan on only testing things that have a significant application. Lex isn't willing to have something out there that can change you and make you dangerous, she will not allow any of them to be used if they can cause a reaction in you and Clark, or other aliens. She has already discounted one because she had no counter for it. The tests would be months away, and we would only ask if it is something that had applications to help humanity”

Kara looked at Alex, there was something in kryptonite that could help humans heal, that was amazing, her family had done a lot of damage to their planet, and to earth, not to mention medusa and Astra. That would help humanity fight illness and disease, it could help Lena cure cancer, that was amazing but she was still scared. She looked at Alex and bit her lip lightly.

“If we did this I would have conditions, Lena would be the one to test it on me, To create the area for testing so that if I am dangerous I can't get out. The antidote would be there ready, and there would be absolutely no and I mean no more than one test at a time, I am not playing emotional whiplash, they will be done only when I am happy to on my schedule not anyone else's, I am not a lab rat. Not that I am saying yes yet, but I am not saying no.”

“I think that Lex would be happy with that, to a point, although her need for consistency would be affected, as much as I want you to be happy when doing this, I will not sacrifice Lex either. Lena can ensure that she has whatever treatment that she has for Lex, and I think that we will be able to work it.”

The conversation continued, Kara would speak to Lena about this, she knew that she was with Lex. She looked at her sister who was clearly trying her best to balance her love for her, and the budding feelings for Lex. She wished that she could tell her about the conversation but it wasn't her place, she needed to create something with Lex that was amiable. It was becoming more obvious that Lex was going to be a part of her life moving forward and that was something that she would need to manage.

“You like her and trust her Alex, Lena trusts her, I don't, and I know that I said I would try but I am concerned, there are two Lex’s in my mind and neither of them have really been all that friendly to me, and my family. Lena has asked for me to spend time with Lex to get to know her, and I think that you being there would be of help. I want to try, I want to see the good, but she scares me, and I know that isn't very hero like, but I am also Kara, and right now, Kara is nervous about this whole thing. Maybe when I have spent more time with her I will feel a little better.”

“You saved her the other night, I saw the pictures, she didn't try to hurt you, and clearly you didn't hurt her so, I think that this is a start.”

Alex looked at her, it was unusual for Alex to be the one that was optimistic, she generally thought of herself as a cautious realist, but the thought of Kara and Lex getting along did hold special interest to her, she really liked Lex, she couldn't help but think about things that she shouldn't. Like the almost kiss, the way that Lex complimenting her made her feel amazing, how the thought of Lex and her ethical promiscuity sparked something in her. Her heart was speeding up and she could feel it beating harder and stronger as she thought about Lex, the small smile on her face as thoughts of the dark eyes, the raised brown red lipstick with a soft smirk. The way her hair fell over her face and created definition in a way that make up couldn't. She was lost for a moment in the thoughts.

“Alex, you have that look, tell me what your thinking about”

“I almost kissed her, she was struggling and talking about herself in a way that wasn't true and I captured her face and looked in her eyes, there was a wonder and a softness, damn she was beautiful and vulnerable and open, I felt like there was something there that she wanted me to kiss her, but I stopped myself. She is amazing and beautiful and you know what, when she is just her in her lab, she is nothing like the image that we see elsewhere, she is.. god Kara I really like her.”

“Rao that much huh, well maybe next time just kiss the woman”

Alex looked away blushing the thought that entered her mind was definitely not something to share with her sister, but she was now sure a kiss wouldn't be all, and she wasn't sure that one taste would be enough but if it was all she would get, she would take it. She said it to Lena, who had clearly kept her word but the thought of one night with Lex was starting to take a place in her mind that was much more prominent than she would like to admit, it would probably ruin her for the rest of her life, but just to experience it once, would be worth it.


	46. A lot can happen in two months pt 1

Lex’s POV

Things fell into a nice rhythm, Lex would have breakfast with Lena on Lena days and Alex all the other days, they would both travel to the lab together, Lex had stopped using different routes, although still took the car instead of walking across the street she trusted Alex but still there could be other people looking for her and well she wasn't about to end up in the clutches of Lane or her mother again. They worked together daily and they were working through the samples quickly they had started to find some very exciting properties, there were a number that would be helpful to humans, some aliens, and some for plant life. They continued to talk and Lex found more out about Alex, it didn't make her any less unpredictable but it did make Lex more and more intrigued by her. Lex didn't have anything to do with the superfriends in person, but there were a number of things that she brought to Alex’s attention.

“So this will give you a three hundred and sixty degree surveillance, and this is an AI style deflection disk, with three of these, you would have someone at your back and each side they will analyse and neutralise any shrapnel or projectile that comes your way”

“Wow Lex that, I mean this is amazing, to be able to get a visual like this will really help and not having to worry about things coming at me from behind is great, this will be great for the team”

Alex looked at her, it was amazing that she was able to come up with these things so easily and was willing to let them have them, she didn't want to negotiate a price, she didn't want to have them sold, there was really no reason that she could see for this behavior. Sure Lex could have though. I wonder if and when she made it, but once it was complete it could have funded her lab, been used in other areas, but she was just handing them over. She had previously said that there was no intention, just to create and then her inventions solved problems, the ones that didn't get turned into something nefarious. She was a little speechless but she did grip Lex tightly looking at her there was no pulling away, so she was pulled into a strong Danvers hug, when Alex released her she could see something on Lex’s face, she was a little flustered. Alex hoped that she hugged her with enough purpose that she didn't hurt her.

“Sorry that was just such an amazing gift, thank you Lex”

“It was nothing just a curiosity I couldn't have my inconsistent variable out there without protection”

Lex had continued to work with Alex helping with different bits when there was a problem, but never asking to go to the base, she didn't even ask where it was. Lena had started introducing her to Kara, little by little the woman didn't immediately bring her hackles up. Then there were meetings with supergirl too, they were less successful to a degree, Lex knew it was Kara but she behaved differently in the costume. It was a month in when things changed, Lex had needed treatment shortly after, her mind had not handled the loss of Alex two and a half days a week, she knew that it was coming and thought that she had prepared for it but she was definitely not. She had underestimated the pull of the Danvers woman quite considerably, in addition taking Vasquez had meant more time at the DEO, she started working two and a half days at the DEO and two and a half in her Lab, she attributed the shift to the loss of normal patterns coinciding with the difficulties in her brain.

There was a night that they were all together, and then there was an issue that needed the super, she whipped off with Alex in her arms and Lex had spiralled. She had been taken care of by Lena and she had a treatment, falling asleep easily. She woke up the next day but the issues were still there, she thought that the treatment had failed. She had calmed the moment that Kara and Lena had entered her room, Alex and Kara had returned late and were both fine. The bile in her throat told Lex that this was not enough, she continued her work, but spent weekends in the lab now too. She was not sure what she needed to do to stop this feeling, her stomach would lurch every time that Alex left, it would leave her with this nauseated anxiety until she returned. She worked through saturday and sunday for the last two weekends. Lena came to the lab on the third sunday, she brought take out and convinced Lex to stop and eat.

She was tired, she knew this, every evening she returned to her Lab, every weekend, she was living on take out from her normal places but she had become completely isolated, she wasn't meeting Alex or Lena for breakfast, she wasn't spending time out of her lab except for the DEO, she knew that this obsessive behaviour was worrying for her sister but she couldn't stop. She needed to get this to work, she needed to have a way to know that Alex would not be hurt. Her obsessional need to ensure that nothing could go wrong with the missions, that Alex would always return to her. Why did she want this she didn't know but she needed it none the same. Thoughts of her and Alex had been in her mind, she was accustomed to her in a way that was dangerous and she knew that, but more than that she wanted Alex to be hers. She wanted more than a one night stand, she wanted to have what she saw with Kara and Lena, she knew she was not capable of that, not like they were. At the same time she hoped that what she could offer would be enough. She knew that it wouldn't be, that was why she was not pursuing it.

She was caught in this place where the object of her obsession couldn't be hers, couldn't be possessed, but if she lost it she wouldn't survive it she knew that, there would be no rescuing her from the loss of Alex, there would be no car’s no suits, not this time, she wouldn't go out with flare, there would be no way for a super to interrupt her. She could see the look on Lena’s face, she knew that her dark thoughts were playing on her face, and her behaviour had already concerned her. She was a bundle of nervous energy, her fingers thrumming on her thigh and she felt the moment that Lena took her hand.

“Lexi talk to me, Do you need another treatment, is there anything that I can do, you're scaring me Lexi, I don't want to lose you.”

“I just need to get this finished, I have a project Lena you know what that is like, and you know just because I am focused doesn't mean I am not well. I have already perfected the disks to give full coverage, and I have created additional boosts for the suit, she will be able to move faster and have enough of a boost for a short flight without damaging what she had, I have incorporated, heat, radiation, and bullet proof elements but I can't get the reflective camo to work.”

Lex looked at her brows pulled together, she was trying to explain what was the problem, the technical difficulties and the way that the nano tech in her suit wouldn't accept the additional element, that it was causing her to be unable to adequately sleep, she needed to just get this sorted. Alex would be near invisible, giving her an escape, she would have flight to move out of the way, she would have speed to get in and out, she would always have someone watching her back, she wouldn't be burned, poisoned or shot, she had layer upon layer of protection, but the best protection would be to be able to vanish. After all you can not hit what you can not see. She would be able to walk in and take out people and they wouldn't even see her.

“Lexi, I know that you do not like the thought that emotions are something that you need to deal with, but you sound like me, when I think about Kara being out there, I am anxious and concerned, my stomach twists, I can taste bile in my throat, my hands shake, I can’t focus and I am clumsy and above all else I can't stop thinking about what could be happening, I watch the news, listen to the coms, and it's all because I am in love with her, and can't imagine my life without her, Lexi, I know that you love me, I can feel it, even if you don't want to label it, but I think you love Alex too. Not like you love me though, like I love Kara.”

Lex tried to argue, but there was nothing that she could say that made the statement less true, she knew it and so did Lena, they worked together on the final piece and once it was working she had taken Lex’s hand with a soft smile, and told her to give Alex the new items and then she needed to sleep, that there would be a treatment waiting if she needed it but Lena wanted to monitor her. Lex knew that it was because Lena could see the storm clouds brewing in her mind, and that she was teetering on the edge. Lex had agreed and smiled thanking Lena for her help before embracing her sister. It was a small comfort, but it was enough, the next day was set for a double sisters night, Lex was nervous especially with Lena’s words in her mind.

Lena’s POV

Lena was not one to accept the good things in her life easily, Lexi being back and being ok was tenuous, she knew that her treatments were working but there was always the looming thought that her mother could swoop in and cause an issue. She had no idea what one of her mothers treatments would do to Lexi now after her treatments, she was sure that her treatments were removing the additional receptors that had been created by the flooding of hormones, but she wouldn't be able to be sure without dissecting Lexi’s brain and she was not planning on having that happen ever. She was confident that her treatments were working; she had not needed that many and there had been a lot of things that had been potentially triggering. She had introduced Kara softly into Lexi’s world, she had spoken to her about the superfriends and she had been accepting and helpful but didn't want to be directly involved. Which was probably for the best after all she was the head of the DEO and well they were renegades, vigilantes.

Her happiness with Kara was also something that she kept expecting to blow up in her face, after all the very embodiment of hope and light was the complete opposite of her, her Luthor darkness. She continued to wait for the moment that Kara decided that she was not able to move past what she had done but there was nothing that came up. Kara just became more, and more, it was amazing to Lena that everytime she thought that Kara had become the most perfect and attentive girlfriend in the world she would do something to surpass it. Her interactions with Lexi were even something that made her heart swell, Kara doing her best to avoid anything that would cause a negative reaction. They had been getting closer, to the superfriend going live too and Lena couldn't help but smile to herself, Lexi had ensured that she was safer within the DEO but Lena couldn't wait to have her protected by her inventions, her people, her doctors, training and medical to rival the most advanced technology in every way.

“So tomorrow you are giving notice with the DEO and we are really doing this, we are getting the project off the ground. I can't believe we are finally there. The only other thing that could make this better is if you moved in here, with me”

Lena’s heart was rocketing, she knew that this was a big step it had been a month or so since she started making small alterations to make this place seem more homely and she was enjoying the fact that with each new addition there was more time spent there, but she also knew that Kara loved her loft. She didn't want to pressure her, they had been together officially for only a few months, but they had been together in Lena’s heart for years all she wanted was to have Kara with her full time, but the Luthor shadow always made her think that this was going to fall apart.

“Like, living here? All the time? Would you be happy with games nights? I mean sisters nights can be done at Alex’s and well I can arrange sister time when Lex is here and you need space, and it is easier to get in and out of the penthouse, and there is the safety issue, I mean I can make sure your safe in person instead of just checking in a few times, before I head home, and it would mean that I would sleep better there is never a night that I sleep as well as when I can hold you, Oh Rao Lena are you sure?”

“Yes if, if you want that”

Lena had loved the ramble and the resounding hug that followed had been everything, two weeks later they were officially living together, Kara was working with the superfriends and they were ready for the double sisters night. Everything had been going so well and then the emergency pulled Kara and Alex away, she was more worried about Lexi now, she was not handling things well. She wasn't sure what had caused the issue, maybe the impromptu emergency, maybe the visual of Kara becoming supergirl. She had managed Lexi, and got a treatment into her, she had fallen asleep on the couch as before, and Lena was thankful that she was there, and helping Lexi had helped Lena manage the anxious feeling she always had when Kara flew into danger. Kara returned with Alex late. Lena had been surprised when Alex had come in and saw Lexi the instant worry on her face.

“I think that it was a little much for her, but she is ok”

Alex had left and Kara had lifted Lexi off the couch and carried her to the spare bedroom, she was soft and gentle with her even though her grip and hold was tight, she remembered that Lexi needed that and Lena’s heart swelled, to see Kara take care of Lexi again was amazing the next morning she had been listening and told Lena that she was waking, they both went to the room to check on Lexi, she was still off but better, she seemed to calm after knowing that Kara and Alex were both alright. Lena could see just how much the two women cared about each other, Alex the night before and the relief washing over Lexi’s face now. She couldn't help but think that things had progressed, that there was more than like there, this was edging into love. Then it was like the other shoe dropped and Lena couldn't help but worry.

“Hey beautiful, you are thinking way too hard, and it isn't helping the only way that you can sort this out is to go to see your sister, what is this the third sisters brunch she has cancelled. Alex is confused as hell too, she is spending her two and a half days with Lex, but no breakfasts and she is sure that Lex is sleeping at the lab. She knows how much routine means to her and she isn't following any of them, I am sorry that the super emergency caused this Lena I really am, I know what Lex means to you.”

“I am not sure that is all it is, Lexi has only been like this a couple of times, and well they have not been good, and I don't mean evil empire I mean both times Lexi tried to kill herself. I know that we haven't talked about this but it is part of her bipolar, she, she gets obsessive and crashes when she can't manage the obsession, or loses the object of it.”

It wasn't that Lena didn't trust Kara, she did, but she knew that the elements of Lexi that made her dangerous to herself had been the things that had caused her to fight with Superman, had developed some of her worst technology, but more than that, Lexi was dealing with enough without anyone treating her differently because of a mood disorder that she had, even if she did consider herself lacking in emotions. She didn't want Kara to think there was more to worry about, or that Alex wasn't safe she knew that Kara was protective over Alex. The worry was clearly written over her face as Kara had pulled her into a hug and started stroking her hair, she was muttering words of comfort and encouraging her to go to Lex. she went and the resulting conversation had confirmed what she believed to be true. She returned to the penthouse and found Kara sitting on the couch eating Ice cream with a brilliant smile.

“How did it go? You look happier.”

“She is ok, she is about to see Alex and give her what she had been working on, she was stuck and that's why she was struggling, her balance is fine I scanned her, she was just anxious about Alex being in the field, and well lets just say your sister is now the most protected vigilante in the universe. She is going to give us the specs for all the agents, but it's Alex that she is trying to protect, she may be even more protective than you, how was Alex?”

“In honesty I think whatever you did with Lex had a massive impact, she messaged her to come to the lab, I think Alex’s face almost split with the goofy grin and her heart was practically humming, she is so in love with your sister its tooth rotting.”

“Humm yes coming from Lexi I needed to get a insulin shot too”


	47. A lot can happen in two months. Pt 2

Kara’s POV

Kara had enjoyed the date, the penthouse seeming more homely than before, it was like Lena was giving up some of her space to Kara, she loved the way that they moved closer to each other, she was spending more time with her at the secret base and would then bring Lena home, every visit there seemed to be something new there, little things at first, the couch was replaced with something more comfortable and big enough to snuggle. There was a new love seat too, there were DVD’s in a small cabinet by the TV, there were board games and other consoles that appeared. The cupboards were stocked with more of Kara’s favorite things. It had made it much more comfortable and after a long night at the secret base she would often opt to stay and chill with Lena, she loved the way that they would snuggle and just spend time together, it was fast becoming her home, just as Lena was. She had migrated a number of clothes to Lena’s without really thinking about it. Games nights were still at hers, as were movie nights and sisters nights but Lena’s felt every bit as home as her apartment.

Time with Lex was hard, it started slowly but it was difficult, she was fighting two parts of herself always, not unsurprising really, but it was her desire to be tactile, but she couldnt with Lex and her need to be careful which made her stand offish, it generally came out as her arm wrapped across her middle and a silly wave. She found herself nervously rambling all the time, she felt like she was messing everything up, she knew that Lex was important to Lena and Alex, but she was unable to find a grove with her, they were so similar but so different.

“You know that I have understood what you're trying to say long before you finish talking, I am a twelfth level intellect not a twelve year old, you are Kryptonian you are more intelligent than this Kara, do I make you nervous?”

“Pfftt no, um, I just um, I am just trying to get to, nervous hardly, I mean , um, you are not here planning to hurt me, I um, I know that your heart for Lena, and um me too, I just want to find a way for us to get along”

Not her finest hour she thought, she tried still and she was nervous, but not of Lex as such, more of what Lex and her relationship meant, if she couldn't find a way to get on with the woman then she would struggle with Alex and Lena, who seemed to spend so much time with her. Then Lena asked her to move in and the need for Lex and her to be amiable became more important she was giving up her apartment to be with Lena full time, that meant more time with Lex, a realisation that was lost when Lena had led her to the new addition to the penthouse a fully stocked art room with wall to wall glass to let in the sun, it was amazing and perfect. She had left the DEO and was feeling better about that, no more unexpected meetings with Lex, no more demands for her identity from the government, she was calmer and she had not even realised how much that working for the DEO had become daunting since the crisis.

The first attempt at a double sisters night ended in a emergency, she grabbed alex and flew out to the scene, there was an alien that was on a rampage, there was a fight and the DEO were there, but between her and her new team she was able to contain it, the DEO were able to keep the civilian casualties to a minimum. Getting everything sorted out and back to Lena had taken a while, when they landed on the balcony, she saw immediately that Lex had been affected, Alex had run in and the look of pain and worry on her face was evident, they had spoken briefly as Kara walked them out.

“If you and I are too much for her she will stop seeing us, she will cut me out Kara, I need to make sure that she is ok, I don't want to lose her Kara, I know that I am pathetic that she will never want me, not like I want her but just being her friend is enough, I understand how you felt with Lena now, I really do. Please take care of her, fix this please”

Kara could see the desperation on her sisters face, she was getting used to the pining and the way she was about Lex, she was so sure that she wouldn't want her too, she knew that there was more to Lex’s feeling but she couldn't tell Alex, it wasn't fair to used a moment of weakness against Lex like that even if it would help her sister. She had spoken to Lena after the conversation with Alex and Lena had come clean about the fact she knew, she told Lena about Lex fully, they both appreciated the protection of the other sibling. She wouldn't break that now, not after all the work that had been put into this. She had carried Lex to the spare room for Lena and they had slept. The morning they had both spoken to her and Lex didn't seem to be quite right but she wasn't being stranger than normal around Kara. the not quite right became worse, as Lex stopped going to breakfast and dinner, spent more time at the lab, and then no sisters brunched. She had Alex worried about her and then Lena too. She had watched Alex pining for months, and the last three weeks had been worse, she felt that Lex was slipping away, once Lena had gone to see Lex she flew to Alex’s.

“Hey sis, just thought that I would stop by and check in.”

Kara looked at Alex, tilting her head, this was getting worse, she was sitting there, eyes rimmed in red, she was looking at a unreturned message to Lex, it had been a couple days since they worked at the lab together. Alex was taking this hard, without ever dating Lex she was behaving like it was a break up. She moved over to her sister and put her arms around her holding her close. Alex was still clutching a glass of whiskey although she was not drunk, she wondered if she had actually drunk any or if she was just starting. Lena was worried about Lex and well after what she said to her about Lex Kara was worried too, if Lex hurt herself Alex would be crushed along with Lena, although right now Kara was worried about Alex and her unhelpful coping, it had been so much better since she started working with Lex. it boggled Kara’s mind that pining over someone could actually improve Alex’s destructive behaviours.

“She hasn't replied to Kara it's been three days, and she always responds, she isn't alright and I know she isn't but she is not talking about what is wrong, I don't want to push her but she seems depressed, do you know what happened last time she was?”

“Lena just filled me in”

She could see the pain on Alex’s face it caused her heart to ache, she could see that Alex was fighting her desire to drink, but also her desire to go rushing over there, she knew that pushing Lex couldn't help but at the same time she could see the need for Alex to protect, to help. She pulled her closer and took the glass out of her hand placing it on the table as the tears came flooding down her face.

“How can she think that the world would be better without her, like Lena would be better without her, that I, god Kara how could she not see that I would be devastated if she was gone, I know she doesnt love me back but she has kept me around, she must like me a little right? I mean how could she think that I would be happy if she was gone?”

Kara really didn't know how to sooth her sister at this moment, she wouldn't, couldn't even think about what the world would be like without Lena, she thought back to letting Mon-El go and the time that she held the plane, she had known back then that it was always Lena that she couldn't live without, she knew how Alex felt, she had been where she was but Lex did love her, she was sure about that. She wanted to tell her but she wanted her to be calm first to really hear her.

“Lena is with her now, she is going to find out what it is that is causing this, help her, give her a treatment if needed, Lena is not going to let anything happen to Lex and I know that ….”

The confession about Lex was interrupted by Alex’s phone beeping she snatched it up and looked at the message, all at once Kara heart the gasp and the racing of Alex’s heart, she started to sound like a hummingbird and her face was spitting with the world's largest goofy grin. She was frantically typing away on her phone completely forgetting that Kara was sitting there.

“Um, its Lex, she is at the lab at the moment and she is finished with whatever she was working on, she has something to show me and asked if I could go in, I don't know what Lena did but she did something and Lex wants to see me, she asked me to grab food, for both of us, she is ok, she is ok. God, I have to go, Kara hug that brilliant beautiful girlfriend of yours for me, Lex is ok”

Kara just watched as Alex fumbled around she hugged her and watched her race out of the room, she flew back to the penthouse and grabbed some ice cream, flopping on the couch. After the conversation about Alex and Lex, Kara grinned for a moment and grabbed Lena in a massive hug.

“Alex asked me to give you that, apparently you're brilliant and beautiful, I would say that I hope I don't have competition. However from the way she sped out like she was the super, I would say that Alex definitely only has eyes for one Luthor”

“There is only one Danvers girl for me”

Alex POV

Leading up to the start of the superfriends project Alex had been working full time with Lex, she couldn't help it, although she wasn't sure that she would have if she could, she was falling deeper for the woman. They had breakfast together three days a week, they had lunch every day, they worked together all week, and they even had dinners on the occasional late night. Lex had opened up more to her, although working was often in silence, they worked around each other with perfect synchronicity sitting so close that Alex could feel the heat radiating from Lex. Breakfast and lunch and late night dinners had been perfect, Alex couldn't help but feel like they had a quality to them like domesticity, they handed things around without asking conversed like they had known each other forever. Lex challenged her mind in a way few others did, and did not talk down to her,she complimented her and made her feel more worthwhile than she ever had. She challenged Lex back in the way that Lex had expected and they had so many deep discussions.

Discussions had not only been about work and as much as Alex loved talking about their work she loved learning things about Lex too. Lex fensed and could ride, she loved to drive fast and motorbikes as much as Alex, their conversations about music were now more in depth, she had been shocked at the insight the first time they spoke but since then the conversations were more free flowing. She learned more about Lex’s conquests and that she had not really done anything like that in a very long time, although Lex clammed up about why, which led to Alex comforting her, this was also something that Alex loved, she was able to hold her and look into her eyes, comforting her softly without making a big deal about it. This had developed over the last month and it was possible for her to calm Lex without anyone realising she was doing it. That's why she asked her to go for a drink, she felt that maybe just maybe there was more to it.

“Hey Lex, how about a drink now we have finished for the day.”

“Well thank you for thinking of me as someone who would warrant a drink, however I don’t have the time I need to dedicate to that.”

Alex had been crushed, her heart heard the no that was evident, although a polite refusal it was still a no, she smiled and headed out, ended up at Kara’s and enjoyed the evening as best she could although everyone had noticed her dip in mood. They were teasing her a little but it was no more than she had dished out over the year, she supposed it was pay back. The change in work time was needed and she was working half her time with Lex and the other half at the superfriends project. She missed Lex a lot and found that even though she wasn't interested, time with her was still as easy as it was before the attempt to ask her out. She got additional time to be called in on the introductions with Kara. Lena thought that having someone else there that Lex was comfortable with was best and she wouldn't complain about the additional.

Coming back from the emergency to see Lex passed out on the couch was more than Alex could take, her heart pounded in her chest as she moved closer to her, Lena said that she was ok but she couldn't believe that there was nothing wrong. The feeling didn't subside in the following weeks, Lex stopped coming to breakfast, she seemed to be living at the Lab, they were still working on the kryptonite but there was something else that was happening she just didn't know what it was. She could feel her slipping away, she spoke to Kara over and over, she knew that Kara couldn't understand why she liked Lex so much but she always listened, she had listened about Lena for years three weeks was nothing right? Well it wasn't nothing to Alex. this had been torture, Lex was losing weight looking more and more tired, talking less at lunch and she started to panic, was she depressed, she knew that was not a good thing in general people but for Lex it was deadly. After their last shift she had messaged Lex, she suggested coming into the lab one evening to work on the tests for the samples that they wanted to test on Kara.

It had been three days, there was nothing, no response she was just left on read. Left on read for god sake, what did that mean, had Lex finally gotten bored with her? Was it now time for her to admit that she couldn't keep the interest of such a fascinating woman for even two months? She felt sick to her stomach, she was facing the realisation that this was it, it was over and Lex was just phasing her out like an old system. The tears stung her eyes and she felt her heart squeezing like it was about to be crushed. The feeling was worse than Maggie, worse than Kelly, was there no one that could just love her, she laughed at the thought, Lex didn't and haven't ever loved her, but she at least allowed her proximity, something that seemed to be gone now.

Kara had visited, and stopped her drinking, she had not drunk since the night with Maggie, not to excess, a few with Lex here and there but nothing excessive, she wanted to now though. Then came the text, her heart soared into the sky, she smiled and looked at the phone like it was a gift from god herself. There weren't many words; it was concise like Lex always was but it was everything.

Lex to Alex: I have finished the side project that has been occupying my time, it is time to show you, please come to the Lab immediately so you can implement the changes

She replied and rushed about, it was pathetic she knew it she was a useless lovesick lesbian but she couldnt help it, she was in love with Lex, their time together had been so special to her, she had grown and she had felt so valued. Even the past three weeks where she had been distant Lex had complimented her and still talked just not as much. She wondered what this side project was. She hugged Kara and was gone. She headed to the Lab after picking up food and entered, Lex looked tired but the smile on her face when Alex walked in was blinding. She placed the food by the couch on the table where they ate dinner. Wrapping her arms around Lex, she knew this display was not what Lex would normally accept but she found that Lex had curled into her and gripped her back as tightly. She seemed to sag into her like whatever was holding back was gone and she just melted into her. Alex was confused by the display but was not going to say no.

“Alex, I am glad you were able to make it, I have been working on some projects, after the night that you left with Kara for the emergency I realised that there was a chance that even with the technology you could be hurt. This is not acceptable, and I am not willing for you to be in danger and taken away, I have become accustomed to you occupy a unique space in my mind and have created a new function in my life, for the sake of humanity and my continued stability I was unable to reconcile that”

Alex watched as Lex moved away and turned her back there was something very familiar about this, she was going into a monologue, like the first night that they talked, she was used to her doing this and the way she would turn away when there was an emotion that she was struggling with.

“As much as you are a inconsistent variable in my life, a wildcard, you are my inconsistent variable and I have come to require that, which is somewhat of a contemptuous position to be in, where as I am unable to accurately analyse your factors I am able to analyse outside ones and as such, I have developed a number of Items”

Alex liked the way she said that, “My Inconsistent variable” she would happily be Lex’s she would show her what it was like to receive love, she would help her understand relationships as best she could help Alex was no expert but together they were honest and forthright they could work through it. She smiled softly as Lex turned around she couldnt quite tell what Lex was feeling from the expression on her face.

“I have eliminated, heat, radiation, bullets, modified the defenses, given you a speed boost, a flight boost and invisibility, that should counter almost all external variables, if there is anything else I need to counter, you need to tell me, even if it is something that you only encounter once, than I can neutralise it. Now that I have finished this we can get back to work and look at the tests.”

“Oh my god Lex that is, unbelievable, you have been doing this for me? That's why you have been stuck in the Lab?”

Alex didn't argue when Lex reiterated her need for consistency, Lex didn't argue with the additional hugs and a kiss to her cheek that Alex did on the spur of the moment, they sat down to eat and after Lex was full she had somehow managed to drift off, with her head propped up on her arm on the couch. Alex had moved her to lay her comfortably and placed a blanket over her. She ran her hand through her hair and kissed her temple, and whispered, “I love you Lex” she couldn't help it, after what Lex had done for her she couldn't hold it in, after all this was something you would only do for someone you really cared about, she lay on the other couch, and watched Lex sleep until she drifted off herself.


	48. Double sisters night, feels like a double date.

Lex arrived for the predetermined double sisters night, this was going to be a trial but it was needed before Kara could come to the lab and start testing, three was going to be a discussion about the safety and the test and what Kara should expect, but they were not planning to just do that. If it was just a idea of them sitting down and talking over the practicalities of the next day it would be easy, but no, this had to be a social occasion, with apparently games and movies, a complete sisters night experience Lex was not particularly fond of the idea, movies had little place in her life they had no function other than to waste time and stop her from doing things that were more important, she didn't understand games much either after all chess was strategy not a game. She had not played games as a child, there was nothing about them that she understood, Lena had tried but at the end of the day fun was not a practical use of Lex’s intelligence.

She stood and waited for the time to tick over as always and knocked Lena opening the door, and ushering her inside. She smiled and hugged her, she saw Kara standing off to the side and offered a nod and small smile, Kara awkwardly waved as always and she looked, Alex was not there, where was she? Lex had come to expect the appearance of Alex and the calm of her presence, she wasn't early she knew that timing her arrival to the second as always, she stood in the kitchen are and waited.

“So Lena what have you been working on?”

“Well Kara and i have been working on solar energy, combining plan and kryptonian plasm to create a gel like energy pack that can hold and store more of the sun's radiation, but there is still a discrepancy the power convergence is still off.”

Lex looked at Kara clearly and was more intelligent than she let on. If she was working with Lena, she had a recollection of the information that she had gathered about Krypton and the different roles that people played in society. She assumed that with Kara being supergirl that she was one of the protectors, the army or lawmakers, could it be that she was a scientist that not only was there a hero masquerading under the cardigans but a scientist as well. She raised her brow and looked at the woman shuffling a little nervously.

“Tell me what guild were you assigned to Kara?”

“I um, well I was the youngest member of the science guild on Krypton before the planet exploded, but I don't really do a lot with science here, as you are aware with your work on the periodic table, the human sciences are um, a little behind and I didnt want to stand out”

Kara was nervous talking to Lex about almost everything but maybe she would be able to make some headway with science, she didn't know if Lex would ever consider her a equal in any way, they seemed to have a dynamic where Lex just couldn't cope with her and the way she was, maybe if she kept things a little more scientific they would be able to find some sort of common ground, outside Lena and Alex. She took a deep breath and looked at her.

“The combination of the plant genomes that create the chropaphil that aids in photosynthesis, have been combined with the kryptonian plasma and red blood cells minus the active DNA to ensure that it is the function that is captured not the actual DNA do that the plans can aid in the conversion and the cells can store the energy, the extraction was easy enough to process, using thermodynamic, it is much like a reactor, however the binding agent seems to reduce the capacity of the cells meaning that there is less capacity to store the energy, we need to create a way to bond everything and maintain the cell integrity without reducing the effectiveness”

Lex’s brow raised, for the first time it appeared that Kara was speaking the same language as she was, it was ironic as she could understand kryptonian and english perfectly well but as for kara speak, or that rambling stutters speed talk that she normally did, Lex was at a loss. Of course she knew what she was saying but it was the excessive amount of words that were used that caused her to become frustrated. After all there was no need for the excess and social convention had taught her to take turns meaning she had to wait for the ramble to stop.

“There is a form of kryptonite in my lab, I have it held most securely as it will exponentially increase your powers, however if we used it as a micro infusion to agarose gel, it could create a DNA combination factor and then it would enhance the power hold of the cells without compromising the fluidity of the cell”

Lena looked at Lexi, she was brilliant undeniably but it was the way she was casually conversing with Kara that had caused her heart to beat somewhat erratically, she was also divulging that there was something in her lab that could make kara even stronger than she was, this would not be something that she expected, if they used this would it mean that Kara would become even more super powered would it protect her? Would the gel packs become a boost for her would she just keep getting stronger? So many questions flooded her mind. Then there was a knock at the door and she felt a ruffle of wind behind her before Kara pulled open the door and hugged Alex, with a happy hello, she watched as Alex curled around her sister and smiled, her eyes locking with Lex, as her smile widened. 

Lex watched as she moved over to Lena and apologised for being late offering her a small hug. Lex noticed that it was a little less full and shorter, there was still an issue between Lena and Alex. Then Alex was headed towards her, was she going to get a hug too? Was this normal for a sisters night? The silent questions were answered as Alex moved closer and greeted Lex with a hug. Lex had once again melted into the hug, she didn't miss the look between Kara and Lena. the moment that Alex had held her the thoughts of the previous conversation left her and she couldn't help but just fall into the feeling that was uniquely Alex.

“Ok so first things first, we can talk about tomorrow and then when food arrives we can start with some games, it’s going to be fun”

“Fun in inconsequential to activities, there is no function of it in the work that I am doing but I have agreed to participate in the activities”

Lena had decided to do things this way so that it it got to much for Lexi she could bow out early, she didn't want her to be overwhelmed with this but it was something that she wanted to do more, to have all the people she loved in one room, and that included Alex, even though Alex and her were not quite there she did love her, even if it was in connection to the way that she protected and loved Kara. she looked at Lexi with a familiar smile, she remembered this conversation from their childhood and there was really no point in engaging she had started to move to the dining area where there were specs for the lab and the information that Lex gave when she heard Alex address Lex.

“The idea is that there is something that can be focused on while we all become accustomed to each other, it avoids having nothing to do, gives rules and structure, it alleviates uncomfortable feelings, that will have my sister filling the silence, especially if there isn't a focus”

“I see it is a methodology to create a link that allows people to familiarise themselves with the others behaviors while not putting them under a microscope and being overly intrusive, a social engagement that aids as a catalyst with defined rules of engagement”

Lena had let a small grin grace her face, why had she never thought of that as a way to explain playing games to Lexi all those years ago, Alex really did have a way with her, although she was completely oblivious to the feelings that she had for the woman, much like Lexi, Alex was brilliantly oblivious. They sat around the table and Lexi and Lena explained all the different security, how they would get into the lab, the multiple layers of security and the storage. They discussed that the first experiment would be one hundred percent safe as the rock only had influence when touching the skin but Lena was sure that Kara was only partially listening. She watched as Lexi sat close to Alex and every now and then there was a moment where she would glance up at the red head and then return to the room. There was a reverence in her gaze when Alex was speaking and she just wanted to lock them in a room until they worked it out. They went over things a number of times until the door went and the food was delivered.

“Pizza and potstickers, finally I am starving.”

“When are you not”

Lex was left with Alex as they had both headed off to the door, Lena collecting plates and cutlery as Kara went to the door, Lex heard the door open and close and she could smell the pizza. This was not a pizza night or a chinese night, Lex had a specific menu and this was most definitely not on it. She felt Alex’s hand around her wrist and looked up to see Alex looking at her with a small smile. She couldn't quite make out what was on her face exactly, but there was a nice calming feeling that washed over her, she could just not eat anything skipping one meal wouldn't hurt. Then there was a second knock and Alex’s face spread into a wider smile and she squeezed before letting go of Lex’s wrist and headed out to the door. Lex was confused for a few moments before the three women returned and Lex’s normal order was placed in front of her and Alex took a seat next to her. There was a small blush on Alex’s cheeks. She wondered why that was the case, Lena and Kara seemed to be laughing about some private joke. They started eating and Kara pulled out a game and started setting it up with a mouth full of pizza.

Trivial pursuit was first, and they soon realised that this was a game that was mostly pointless to play when in the presence of not one but two Luthor’s. Kara pouted at the way the game was over in record time, Lex winning as she was the first to land on the centre square. There had been some grumbling, but the lucky fact that Lex’s entertainment question was about classical music was the only reason she could answer it. They tried scrabble thinking that it would even the playing field with Kara being a journalist, but the Luthor sisters dominated that too. Alex was getting a little fed up, her competitive streak showing. Kara was pouting more and more with every moment. Lex seemed to understand the games and the most efficient way to win, although didn't seem to take any pleasure from it. She just shrugged off the jibes reminding them she was a twelfth level intellect and the games were for family time, her polite way of saying children. Kara then decided on an articulation game. They would split into teams the Luthor’s V the Danvers. Alex knew her so well she was sure that they would win.

“Um, ok well this is um, it's a actor, and um oh oh, he plays an Alien in star trek, he is um, oh Rao what else is he in, oh oh, Alex it's the DNA that Penny gave to sheldon in the big bang that made him hug her”

“Lenard Nemoy”

“Ok this is the band, my favorite from when I was younger, my OTP is the lead singer and they have still to reform so that I can take Lena to see them as it’s her guilty pleasure too.”

“NSYNC”

“Um Rao it is my favorite movie”

“Wizard of oz”

“Rao ok this um, this is the guy um its a scientist, he um, oh god he is, um her is in Big bang too..”

“Neil degrassy tennison”

“No um, he is a physicist”

“George smoot”

“No not a astrophysicist, Alex come on, you know the really smart one, Howard makes the model”

“Stephen Hawking, Damn Kara you could have said he was in a wheelchair.”

The buzzer went off and Alex just looked at Kara in disbelief, she was normally better at this game, she pinched the bridge of her nose and she looked over at her sister picking up a potsticker and eating it, much to the dismay of Kara. Lena got up and headed out to get more drinks and she felt Lex move in.

Lex had sat there so confused about what had just happened, there was no correlation between the theory of the big bang and the actor, there was no way that Alex should have taken so long to understand that she was talking about Hawkings, as for the other things, what the hell was a OTP and why was there a band that was a guilty pleasure, why was something considered a guilty pleasure. Very little of what just happened made any sense to her, she was so confused by this game she really didn't understand how what Kara was talking about had any interaction with the game at all. Lex was a twelfth level intellect; she had a better understanding of theoretical physics than anyone in the room but the random word vomit from Kara seemed to make even less sense than normal. She didn't like feeling so lost and confused, this was why she didn't like social situations.

“What has the expansion of the universe got to do with the actor that played Spock? And why would you suggest all those random scientists when Stephen Hawking literally wrote the book on the big bang, his book the brief history of time is literally phenominal.”

Alex was a little surprised by Lex knowing who Spock was in the first place but she was able to see that she was struggling with the information, it would make little sense if she had no reference for the pop culture that Kara was talking about and she clearly did not. Alex took her wrist again to calm her and then whispered, Kara would hear but she knew if she whispered Kara would take that as assumed privacy, or at least she hoped that she would.”

“The big bang is a TV show, you actually might appreciate, it is centered around science, there are physicists, theoretical physicists, neuro biologists and microbiologists, an engineer and a recurring geologist. They meet a sunny kind of silly woman and they have a very interesting dynamic.”

“Engineers are not scientists, and Geologists are not much better”

Lena had walked in as Lex spoke and started to laugh, Kara had looked up at Lena she heard what they were talking about clearly but had no idea why Lena was laughing so hard. She looked over at her sister and smiled brightly.

“You sound just like Sheldon, you know I wondered if the person that wrote him for the Big bang, ever met you and now I am convinced. So here drinks, and it's our turn Lexi. Look at the words and just give me a clue without saying the words on the card ok.”

Lex looked at the little stack and nodded, it sounded simple enough but she was not sure that she would be able to understand the social and pop references, she could be of little use to Lena, this game was frustrating. She took a deep breath and nodded for Alex to turn the timer.

“The reverse of a sudden drop in barometric pressure”

“Gone with the wind.”

“Adam and eve 3.14”

“Apple Pie.”

“Midday is no longer antiquated”

“Modern times.”

“Complex carbon tightly packed”

“Diamond.” 

“Finger tapping on the equator”

“Prime meridian.” 

“Holds the world”

“Atlas.” 

The buzzer went off and Lena looked at Kara and Alex who were both sat with their mouths open, she smiled and shrugged, there was a advantage she supposed she knew exactly how Lexi thinks, she had no idea about the song by Rhianna but she knew what made a diamond a diamond, she didn't know what gone with the wind was in terms of a movie, but she understood how a increase of barometric pressure was a sign that there was a storm coming with a lot of wind, so the reverse would be a drop. She had no idea what the game was, called atlas but she knew that Lena would understand her reference to greek mythology, she couldn't help but laugh as she looked at the references on the cards.

“What can I say, Luthor’s are ruthless and you guys lost. Shall we move into the living room and watch something?”

Kara and Lena started to clean up as Alex walked into the living room with Lex, she decided that they should leave the love seat to Kara and Lena, and they went to sit down on the couch, Lex sat a little closer than Alex was expecting almost touching but not quite. Alex could feel her heart pounding at the proximity and looked at Lex. She seemed to be still confused about the interaction in the other room. She asked again about the big bang, but a little quieter, she clearly didn't want to be overheard by the others. Alex smiled and grabbed the control calling up youtube and selecting episodes, she thought about what ones to show. First up was the lunar excitation where Sheldon met Amy, they were just settling into it when Kara and Lena slipped in and sat in the love seat neither of them asking about the choice of show. Lena had an idea and started to select the episodes. Next was the zazzy substitution where they terminated their relationship and Sheldon didn't like the lack of Amy in his life.

Lex watched in fascination normally programs had little interest, she spoke about the science here and there and was engaged in the strange behaviours of the cast with each other, she could see a lot of herself in this Sheldon character, he was brilliant and awkward, she missed most of the jokes and looked to Alex who explained them, she smiled and moved a little on the couch to get comfortable, it was strange, she didn't seem to mind watching this, it was engaging and seemed to explain social conventions well, she didn't notice it getting late. They watched another three episodes. The flaming spittoon acquisition, had Sheldon writing up a relationship contract with Amy and Lex couldn't help but see the benefit in something clear like that, how it would make roles easier to understand. The fish guts displacement showed Sheldon putting his normal behaviour aside for a sick Amy and she zoned out for most of it, thinking about the last few weeks where she put on hold everything in her life to make sure that Alex would be safe and she was lost for a while. The prom equivalency was the last episode that Lena chose, the one with the I love you’s. Lex watched as the character like her explained that he loved Amy. She had watched, and found the whole thing quite enlightening. 

“I think that is enough for tonight, although I am glad you liked it Lexi, I told you that it was a good show. If we are going to the lab before brunch tomorrow then we should probably call it a night.”

Lena didn't really want to, she was enjoying the comfort of having everyone around her but she also didn't want to overload Lexi. she knew that the episodes that she chose were significant, and there was a hidden message, she knew that Lexi wouldn't take it literally but Kara and probably Alex would know what she was doing. Alex and Lexi left the penthouse with a hug and Lena smiled at herself, she thought it was just a small push, and it may be enough.

“Lena Luthor, your DNA was on full force tonight, don't think I don’t know what you were up to there, come on let me take you to bed and we can work on the other Luthor DNA abilities”

Kara had wiggled her brows and pulled her towards the bedroom. She had shared Lena enough for one night and all that close snuggling had given her a kick into the more intimate need that was now present. Watching the love blossom between Amy and Sheldon was sweet, she could hear Alex and Lex’s heart throughout and there were glances that she didn't miss, neither did she miss the couple of times Alex had held Lex’s wrist while explaining something in the show. Her girlfriend was beautiful and brilliant.

Lex was quiet in the elevator down to the garage, she had been contemplating the show, she knew that it was only fiction but there was something about it that mirrored her own world in a way that she couldn't ignore. She wondered if Alex felt anything for her, she really wanted it to be the case, but she didn't want to pin hopes on it, she needed Alex in her life, she was so kind and sweet, she had an amazing mind and treated her like there was nothing wrong with her. Their time together was something that Lex cherished on the same level as Lena, only there was more, she knew that there was a desire to have more of Alex. she offered her a ride and Alex smiled and accepted, not quite ready to have Alex leave her just yet. They slipped into the back of Lex’s car and sat together.

“Tonight went well I think, it was an interesting way to spend an evening. I don't think that the games went well though, you and Kara seem to find them less fun than you suggested they would be, did I do something wrong?”

“No Lex, Kara and I are both quite competitive in nature and well you and Lena won every game, I think that if we are going to play anything again we will need to split you up, although I think the fairest pairings would be Lena and me, with you and Kara.”

Alex thought about that for a moment, she knew way too much about Lex and Kara for it to be fair, but Lena and her have less solid a foundation, and her and Kara had less too, although she couldn't help but grin at Lex’s response. Future games nights could be fun indeed.

“Well as much as I am not going to commit to such futile endeavours in the future but I can guarantee you that no matter who I am partnered with I wouldn't be on the losing team, Luthors don't Lose Alex.”

They pulled up at Alex’s Lex still didn't really want to let Alex go but the time was over. She slid out of the car and gave Alex a hug, she noticed how Alex stiffened momentarily but then melted into the embrace. As Lex let her go and moved towards the car she could see the flush that was on Alex’s face. She wondered if that was inappropriate, but in the moment it felt right, she wouldn't want to upset Alex, but she didn't want to spoil the evening so she slipped into her car. She could ask another day.


	49. Visiting the secret lab

Lex’s Lab National city (National City) 01-06-2020 Earth Prime 08:40………

They had agreed this and Kara had agreed to not try to work out where the lab was, they had all been in the car and there was no way that they could be tracked, Kara had kept her end of the bargain, keeping her glasses on the whole was they, they had taken a fairly fast route. When they got out of the car Lex had gone through the security and announced a guest for hand print scan only. She asked Kara to place her hand on the panel, explaining that it would be needed for the elevator as only people with clearance could use the elevator. This was the baseline meaning that she was only able to be in the lab, in the elevator with one of the other three present. She had done as asked and they all went up to the next level. Lex couldn't say that she was easy having the woman in her lab but she was comforted by the presence of Lena and Alex. She could tell by the way that the woman was fidgeting she was not enjoying this at all. She looked at Alex and she just gave a curt nod. She opened the door and walked through the first lab to the main door.

Kara had been anxious since she stepped into the car, it was one thing to spend small amounts of time with Lex and she was getting comfortable with her presence, she had a lot of things in common with her, although it was definitely a empathic thing, they had similar struggles and issues due to who they were. Although they came about in different ways they had these similarities, however they were hardly alike in any other way. Lex was calculating in speech for the most part. She occasionally went into long monologues but that was what they were there was never anything in the entire speech that was irrelevant nothing that rambled or stumbled over. She literally said what she needed to, where as Kara rambled for the world more so when she was nervous she expressed herself with her hands and her face and voice, she communicated in a million ways, but Lex was clear. The ride in the car was close quarters and she didn't like the way that there was some kind of field around it, she wasn't sure where they were, and it was very nerve racking. Then there was the scan, it was a handprint, she was nervous but it wasn't like she had not already given DNA, if Lex wanted to get into the fortress the DNA was enough.

Every time that she thought that she was ok with Lex being in Alex’s life being in her life there was something like this, that made her feel uneasy, she knew logically what was going to happen because Lena had talked her through it all, she also believed that Lex meant her no harm, why couldn't she just get passed this finally thing and be sure. As sure as she was about Lena. she knew the answer to that, and it was Kal, the information that she had been fed by him since Lex had been taken away, Kal told her about the fight and how she had come after him tried to kill him, he had been down on Lena from the start. It was hard to rewrite all the information from both timelines that she held on Lex, male and female and just be ok with her. They were finally out of the elevator and walking through a lab, it was amazing, it was almost as advanced as the home lab of her father back on Krypton, she looked around and could see the level of security precautions, and she realised how much she had done to make this place a fortress. The next door was the room with the kryptonite and lasers, that was what Lena had said but she didn't pay much attention as she was already panicking when she was about the kryptonite.

The four women stood at the door that leads into the final lab area where the Kryptonite is stored. Of course Alex and Lena know what is beyond the door but Kara had never been in there, it was the first time that Lex had felt that she could risk it, she didn't want to disable everything only to have her life's work destroyed in front of her. Lena was not concerned about after all Lena was family and they were close, not in the same way she thought as the Danvers sisters but they were close. As close as Lex could get to anyone at least, she sighed to herself, her mind pulling up images of things that she didn't want and she started tapping her fingers counting in primes. She felt the hand curl around her wrist, the firm pressure and thumb trailing over her wrist in comfort. She knew who it was without even looking that touch had come to be achingly familiar, craved. It was Alex, she had come to terms she thought in her mind that something had changed in her, that she was no longer looking for the release of anonymous sex, no longer would she be satisfied with someone she didnt know slipping into her bed and out again before the light of day. 

She had not even considered the need since she had met Alex, although the treatment in the sanatorium should have put her off for the rest of her life, she was a pragmatist, there is a need and it needs to be fulfilled, but it had not been, not since the moment that red headed inconsistency entered her life. Here she was with the unwavering belief that Alex would do anything, she knew that Alex although reticent to start was behind her all the way. It was somewhat ironic that the person that she was worried about in this situation was Kara, the lover of her sister and the sister of her… well she wasn't her lover no matter how much Lex thought about it but she trusted her.

The casual touch the pressure, the soft and determined movements had played the part that they were supposed to and Lex felt the counting slow, the images receding replaced with soft looks from Alex and Lena, telling her things were alright, the reassurance and comfort of the arms holding her hard when she was struggling, switching from Alex to Lena. She allowed the small twitch of her lip turn into a small smile as she looked back at Alex. She caught Lena’s eye as she looked back to the control panel and there was a knowing smirk on her face. She raised her eyebrow at her sister, a warning, and then looked at the panel. She started with the security and she smiled briefly as she put up her hand and spoke 01001100 01100101 01111000 00100000 01001100 01110101 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110010. 

The door opened to reveal the room with the same criss cross lasers as always and winced slightly at the brightness of them. She noticed the same wince on the face of Kara, she was about to step forward thinking that the Lasers would have no effect. In honesty Lex was not one hundred percent sure, she thought about it, the molecular decomposition in the lazers would if they could access the DNA reduce her to nothing. However if her invulnerability held the Lazors would bounce off her and strike the others, sure Alex and Lena now had access, but she wasn't going to take any chances here and placed her arm across supergirl, wincing at the light touch of the supers chest against her arm before she stepped back.

“I am sure that you will not believe this but although Lena, Alex and myself are immune to this safety measure, I am not convinced that you are, I do not do anything that I am not one hundred percent sure is going to work so if you will wait one moment for me to turn them off.”

“What, they are just lasers, what are they going to do to me?”

Lex closed her eyes for a moment and brought her hand to the bridge of her nose, the arrogance of the supers never failed to strike a nerve with her and she squeezed hard, muttering a few numbers before she felt Lena place her hand on her shoulder and strong and firm grip, a simple I am here, from her sister was all it took and she stepped into the room turning to look at Kara. She knew that Kara had been on the planet less time than Superman, that she had lived on Krypton and even with her young age when she left with such an advanced culture, even rudimentary science lessons must have far surpassed anything on earth at that time. The night before had shown that she had a firm grasp of bioengineering. She would explain, and if the woman didn't understand it, she would show her and then maybe Lena would fill in the blanks. A small smile graced her lips as she remembered Alex’s reaction to the room and shook her head. Maybe Zombies and the red queen would have been a simple answer, but from what she understood of the woman, horror movies were not her thing, much more Disney and musicals.

“The lazers are not just lazers no, they are a complex and advanced genetic coding beam set to decompile and erase any DNA that enters the room that is not stored on the system, using the genetic sequencer in the lab, it is not even possible to remotely add, or add a code that was not expressly taken from the first door, with your Kryptonian skin it would not have been possible to take the sample, so it is not in the system, and even if it was, you can only add it at the panel at the far wall over there. The decompiling of the DNA is on the molecular level somewhat akin to the effects of Anti matter, the beam is literally a inert and harmless constant stream of dedicated and intelligent antimatter that will destroy any forign DNA at the molecular level, giving even the Kryptonian healing power little or no chance to combat it. Now between here and there, there are no less that three hundred lasers interlocked in a weave that would mean that you would need to be exceptionally small to get through, and even then, there is a AI behind it that can track and monitor even the most microscopic of DNA sequences within this room and change the patterning to a wide dispersal beam and cover the entire Lab. I am not sure if they will or will not affect you, but I am not going to take that chance, we could test the theory however if you want to supply me with a strand of your hair.”

Kara looked at Lex standing in amongst the lasers with her hand stretched into the other room through the threshold, she blinked a couple times as she listened to the information over again in her mind. Of course she knew about anti-matter, the anti-monitor had almost destroyed all the multiverses with it, and before that it was in her history lessons on Krypton, they had harnessed the power and it was very dangerous it had been removed and outlawed because of the destructive nature of it. She was sure that there was no one on earth that was even close to cracking the Anti-Matter formulations, let alone combining it with DNA sequencing and AI to create inert beams of it that would become destructive the moment an unknown variable entered its proximity. She swallowed hard at the information and the sight of Lex stood in the middle of it. For the first time in her life she realised something that scared her, Lex Luthor was a genius like no one had ever seen, she was able to create and execute anything that she wanted to including killing her and Clark if she wanted to. 

That thought was chilling but with it came the realisation that what she had been told was true, that Clark had pushed her and she retaliated, that she wasn't actually trying to kill him or her, it was true, Lex wasn't evil. Scary, intelligent, misguided true but nor evil she looked at Lena and she knew that she could read her expression, Lena offered a small and watery smile as her eyes locked with Kara’s and she nodded briefly. Kara’s hand moving to her hair and pulling a strand out, handing it to Lex. They all watched each one of them not sure what would happen to the hair. Lex curled her hand around it and pulled her hand into the room, as she opened her hand in the centre of the intersectional beams, they all watched as the hair was targeted by them, there was fizzing and popping, before the hair dissolved into nothing. Kara let go of her preconceptions, for a moment and just looked at the woman who had just hurt herself to stop her experiencing that destruction happening to her, and there was that warmth again, like when she had watched the pancake flipping. Warmth in her heart for Lex?

Lex watched intrigued, she knew how quick the beam worked on other hair and DNA sequences, she had tested it on a variety of Alien, human and plant DNA, she wanted to be sure that the beams protected against everything, she wouldn't run the risk of this depth of her lab being breached. She knew that plant DNA was mostly unharmed, except plants that could cause harm, Human DNA was neutralised in 1 second, Alien DNA had ranged from 1.04 to 1.2 seconds, Kryptonian DNA lasted 2.38 seconds. She wondered if that was long enough to get to the panel, if she would be able to recover from the initial effects if she could disable it. Kara was definitely fast enough to get across to the panel in the time that she had, but that wouldn't do much if she couldn't turn it off, and that needed DNA and a pass code. She knew that she couldn't use her heat vision to blast it that would just neutralise the Kryptonite and flood the room. 

Even with that in her mind she could see that Kara was reacting differently than expected, the look on her face was confused, maybe she had not understood what Lex had said and was just surprised to see her own DNA destroyed. She had not been around her enough to really learn her skills. She walked over to the panel and disabled the lasers glad to finally have the light assaulting her removed. She called up the containment and motioned for them to come in, she decided that the first test should be something that was easy, already mostly known and small, something to help build the trust and relax the jittery blonde. She moved over and solved the necessary problem to open up a familiar draw and pull out a small rock. She watched as Kara instinctively pulled away from the small shining rock as Lex placed it on the table.

“There is nothing to fear Kara, this form of Kryptonite has a radius of less than one hundredth of a inch, unless it is direct contact with skin it has no effect on anything, it also has no physical effects on Humans, Kryptonians, or plants, it is the one that when in contact with the skin removed the ability to lie, in humans anyway, I wondered if it had the same effect on you? I haven't had the chance to test it on Aliens at all, not surprisingly there are not a line of volunteers for this. The more direct the question the harder it is to lie, if the question is ambiguous you can give more of an ambiguous answer. Now I am well aware you do not trust me, so I am going to leave the lab and close the door, Lena and Alex can ask questions, if you would be so inclined to test it, the moment it is not in contact the effect is removed.”

Alex took her arm for a moment as she was walking past looking in her eyes briefly, she knew that Lex didnt care what people thought about her, that the perceptions of the mediocre minds of regular humans held no interest at all, but she wanted to express her gratitude, her care, and the fact that she trusted Lex, that she knew that she was not what people said, she was alway reaffirming this to Lex, she wanted to affirm more, that she loved her, that she thought of her in a multitude of soft and loving ways, that for one night with Lex she would push herself to the side, just to experience it, just so she could have a perfect moment. She wouldn't, she liked being here more than she would admit to even herself and something was better than nothing right? She finally understood why Kara had held back so long, why she had fought so hard for Lena, why she had forgiven her. She was the same, a Danvers girl hopelessly in love with a Luthor woman, willing to settle on whatever she could get, whatever time she could bask in the light that came from the other. She was her own person, she was a badass and would fight for everything but when it came to the Luthor who’s arm she was holding at that moment she was soft, and nothing short of a pathetic useless lesbian with the worlds biggest crush. She removed her hand and dropped her gaze from her eyes allowing her to pass. She watched as she swayed out of the lab and the door closed with a loud click. She turned back to see the look being shared between Kara and Lena.

“What?”


	50. The truth will out

Lex’s Lab National city (National City) 01-06-2020 Earth Prime 09:10………

Lena decided that she would get this done as soon as possible after all, her sister had just given up her lab to get this first test done, and she was doing this as a show of trust but she knew that it wouldn't be comfortable for her, after all it was relinquishing control. She didn't have time to try and explain to Alex again that she was being obvious to everyone else but Lexi was literally oblivious to her subtle flirting she had after all tried to explain this to her for the last few months and it was getting exhausting. She picked up the rock and could feel her hand close around it, it was a strange sensation, but at the same time no one was speaking so there was nothing to worry about. She thought about the way truth serum worked and how the the polygraph worked so she needed something simple as a base line, she thought about the kind of questions that she could ask, is the sky blue, is your name Kara Danvers, and then she thought about it, questions that were easy and direct for others were not for Kara, she was Kara Danvers, but she was also Kara Zor-El and she was Supergirl. Oh that was a little more complicated. Something that was a simple yes or no for a base line maybe the way to go, she walked closer and smiled at Kara placing the rock in her hand and the other hand on her shoulder. She looked into her eyes and smiled, speaking softly as she let go of the rock.

“I love you Kara, Do you love me?”

Kara was hesitant; she didn't really want to have the rock anywhere near her but with Alex there and Lena she knew that she wouldn't be asked to do something that could hurt her. She trusted them, and as for Lex, well it was kind of strange that she was willing to leave, to just walk away when she wouldn't be able to lie, did she leave to make sure that she didn't ask questions, both Alex and Lena had said that she was a curious woman and that she would have so many questions. Did she do this to make sure that she did ask, that she didn't break this tentative new arrangement. Lena’s hand on her calmed her and then there was the cold rock pressed into her hand. She felt the pull of the rock and curled her hand around it, the strange feeling washing over her. It wasn't painful or unpleasant, it made her wobble a little like being drunk, it was like taking a shot of Alberium rum. Then Lena opened her mouth, she couldn't help but smile at the declaration of love, and then Lena’s question, she looked at her and couldn't help the full on ramble that sprung out of her.

“Oh Rao Lena, Yes, yes I love you, you are my yellow sun, you give me strength, it is not to bend metal or hold up a plane but strength to stand up after every time I am knocked down, you give me strength to keep fighting, to be who I am, to own my own power and everything that goes with that. You are my Yellow sun, you lift me up, and not in the way I can fly, not in the way I can float away when you kiss me, no. It is the belief that you give me that gives me belief in myself, it is the way that I feel like I can reach any heights with you as long as you're by my side, as long as I have you nothing can tie me to this earth, that there is no power that can hold me. 

Rao yes you are my yellow sun, you make me invulnerable not my skin, not even my heart, but in a way that is far surpassing anything else, it is like you can take all my insecurities and hold them for me, you can see into my heart and know that I need something and you give it to me. You turn all the weaknesses in my life into projects and take them away, making them strong and invulnerable so that nothing can touch me, nothing but you. 

Roa Lena you, you are everything to me, with you in my life I am better, I am all I can be, all I thought I could be and more, because your heart, your love, it pushes me every day to be better, it makes me more than I was alone, yout the air that I breathe, the sun on my face, my safe place, my home, you are everything to me, I love you, but it goes far beyond everything I have ever felt Lena you complete me, you are my reason to fight, you have repaired the fracture that was in my heart from the explosion of my planet, you have chased away the nightmares of being stuck in a endless void, you have given me so much love and acceptance that I feel like I can be exactly who I am and never have to doubt that it will be ok, even when we were separated i still wanted to be better for you, you were still my heart through it all, better you are my soul and it’s beautiful”

Alex listened, sure she knew that Kara loved Lena, she had no idea how deep that it went, she knew that Kara loved hard but this was so far beyond that she could barely contemplate how she was able to hold that much in her. She had always been a little gushy about Lena, even before they were together, but this was some next level rambling of epic proportions, Lena was crying, Alex didn't think that she had expected that when she asked the question. Hell she had been on the receiving end of Kara and her Lena love expressions, oh her eyes they are like a painting that never stills, her eyebrows do this thing and it makes my legs week, her heart is so good but so fragile, every aspect of the woman had a sonnet written about it, her looks, her personality her every attribute revered, but that had been over many years, this, this was like a overwhelming torrent of the purest love and devotion. 

Alex finally understood though, how Lena was able to do that to Kara and how she was able to forgive her, it wasn't that it didn't hurt, it wasn't that it wasn't soul crushing, but it was less than the thought of being without someone that was this much, that meant this much. She thought about how much it hurt when Maggie and her split but she got over it, she didn't feel anything like that, but when Maggie showed up three months ago she would have fallen back into her, but it was the strange conflicted feeling about Lex that has changed that course. She sighed, clearly what she felt for Maggie was hardly comparable to what Kara had with Lena. She thought to Lex, some of Alex could see those things in connection to them, the being better, the making each other better. How Alex wanted to try even though it was just once. There was a longing there that was different. She couldn't take this gushing any more.

“Jesus Kara, I think that I have heard enough of that, as beautiful as it was I mean come on. Have a heart some of us are single, I mean why, why was that all necessary? What have I done that means I have to listen to that?”

“What have you done? Seriously? It wasn't like I was torturing you, you're doing that to yourself quite well without any help from me. It isn't like I was making you sit back and watch the pining and the obliviousness of you and Lex, watching the heart eyes, the longing, the looks and touches, you thinking that just one night would be enough, almost ready to do it and then to torure yourself more, when that isn't what she even wants from you, I mean you two are so blind…”

Kara’s hand had flown to her mouth, Alex has stood gaping at her, she had forgotten about the rock, she watched as Kara tried to dislodge it, her eyes were wide with horror, and Lena was laughing too hard to help her not matter how much that Kara appeared to be pleading with her, she literally couldn't straighten she was doubled over laughing at the situation, clearly Lena and Kara knew something that they were not sharing, Kara’s inability to leave go of the rock meant that she had not finished delivering the truth as she saw it, and there was no way out of this. Alex's heart was frantic beating so fast that she was not sure that she was able to contain it. Her mind was reeling, the way that Kara was talking was like there was something Lex did want, maybe, something more, something that she had missed. The conversations with Lena ran through her head, and then the conversations with Kara, nothing had been said, if kara knew something why wouldn't she have said something? She was going to now.

“Go on, Kara, get it out, what is it that she wants?”

“You, you idiot, how are you so blind, she wants a relationship, she is scared doesnt think that she can do it, doesnt think that she deserves it, and definitely doesnt think that you like her like that, I mean she has an excuse Alex, she has aspergers she cant see it in you, she is not able to recognise this amount of gay panic, she has not reference for it, but she likes you, more than likes you by now, I mean she was so confused and upset when you almost kissed her I had to save her from walking into traffic. She has an excuse: what is yours?”

With that the rock flew out of Kara’s hand and she looked at Alex, Alex watched as she looked to Lena who was still laughing like she had betrayed her in some way, Lena held up her hands in surrender and moved closer to hold her, and whispered about it being ok that she had not betrayed Lex, that it was ok. Alex watched as Kara sank into Lena, her thoughts about what she said in her head, running around the almost kiss that was over two months ago, what had Lex said to Kara, why had she not told her, and what if that though of Lex’s was gone now, what if she didn't like her like that anymore, had she missed her chance with her. No one had ever held such attention from Lex Luthor, she was never going to forgive herself for not being able to show Lex that she did like her that she trusted her, that she was more to her than a boss, a woman, a monster, there was nothing there that she would regret more if she messed this up. She looked to Lena and Kara pleading for reassurance as her heart rate accelerated and she found it hard to breath, this was more than gay panic, this felt like drowning again, she couldnt catch her breath and she could feel her legs getting week. She felt herself slip to the floor, trying hard not to panic.

Kara had not seen Alex like this in a long time, shortly after the incident where she was kidnapped she had a few issues like this but that had been over for a number of years she knew what it was the moment she heard the pulse spike and the breathing become problematic, she turned and looked, sure enough Alex was pale, her eyes unfocused her breathing gasping and her legs shaking, as she started to slip to the floor Kara sped over, Rao she felt bad she shouldht have said that stupid rock, she curled around Alex and held her tightly making sure not to break her bones, and Lena realising this was a panic attack was there, she was getting Alex to focus, to breath with Kara to name things to tell what she could hear, see feel, together they made short work of bringing Alex back to her senses, working together they really could do anything. Kara continued to hold her and sooth her telling her it was ok, and Lena had moved away, she didn't want to crowd her, especially as Alex was vulnerable she knew that Alex still didn't trust her. As she was moving off Alex’s hand shot out and gripped Lena, she moved back and held Alex. Kara felt her heart swelling, dancing even her life was great, her love and her sister were finally getting to that place again, the past no longer in their way.

“How can she not know how special she is, how much I like her, what if she doesn't like me anymore, what if I missed my chance, I am just not interesting enough to hold her attention this long.”

“Alex, I am only going to say this once more, my sister can't understand subtle, she needs you to be direct and explicit, tell her in a simple and plain way, I LIKE YOU, tell her that you like her, that it is not just a friendship, tell her you are attracted to her, ask her out, and I don't mean, hey you fancy joining me for a beer, that is out of her routine and she wouldn't even contemplate it. I mean something like I like you and would like to take you on a romantic date, and Alex, you don't have to worry, I can honestly tell you, that you have all the attention from Lexi, she is always thinking about six million different things at once and the one constant is you.”

Alex listened to Lena her internal thoughts analysing what she was hearing. Lex had been confused and told her that she needed to be clear, she had tried to do this ever since, was it still not clear enough, asking her to the bar for a drink was clear. That was a destination with a goal, of having a drink together, was it still too ambiguous what was it that she had said that first night Alex was running in her mind trying to remember the words. Something about needing to know the purpose of the activity, like drinking or eating was not enough of a reason, that she needed to know what was behind the invitation, the date, that wasn't a date, Lex paid for and put it down as a business meeting because it didn't qualify as a date, there wasn't a purpose that was date like. This meant that Alex needed to be more specific if she was going to ask, how had she been so stupid, she had done so much to ensure that Lex was comfortable but that she had forgotten or maybe her own anxiety needed the ambiguity in case she said no, which was exactly what happened. Then there was the thought that Alex was always somewhere in the back of her mind, the inconsistent variable that she couldn't work out.

“I asked her on a date before”

“Yes but that was to throw her off from what was really going on, she has aspergers but she is a twelfth level intellect Alex, she had a lot of things to draw on in that moment, your recent decision to leave the DEO the information about how you felt about me, there were a million variables, she would have calculated all of the variables to the minute detail and come up with the most obvious answer that you were trying to trick her. She is a Luthor too, remember we always have to look out for the angle, nearly everyone wants something that is a almost consistent variable in all our contemplations.”

“Not me, I am her inconsistent variable, she called me that, she cant work out what I am going to do or why, she says it causes her difficulty, but that I also cause an abnormality in her that means she can adapt.”

If Lena could have face palmed in that moment she would have, it would have been ridiculous and childish, very unlike a Luthor, and very unlike Lena. However, Alex was the smartest dumb person that she had ever met, firstly Lexi never uses posessives for anyone except her and their mother, my inconsistent variable was practically labeling Alex as hers, and then the information about adapting to Alex, that was about as telling as saying that you are changing me, fundamentally, you are literally creating a space in my mind that is connected to you. Lena wondered if Alex paid any attention at all, or if she was just so sure that Lexi couldn't like her that she was keeping the information from herself. She shook her head and looked at Alex.

“Lexi clearly doesn't understand what is happening, her understanding of her own feelings are limited. You know how she regards me, I am her Lena, I have a complex pathway in her mind that creates expectancy and routine, that she finds it hard to manage without, the absence of those regular pathways being triggered by my presence causes her to think about me, in an attempt to regulate the missing triggers and associations. In a typical speech, she loves me and misses me when I am not there, she thinks about me all the time to stop from feeling bad. You are HER inconsistent variable, that gives you value, and YOU have a new function in her mind, meaning you occupy unique space. SO once again, in a typical speech, she has feelings for you, and she thinks about you alot, you make her better.”

Lena almost laughs at the small “o” that appears on Alex’s lips as the blush runs across her cheeks and down her neck, she thinks to herself, “by jove I think she has got it”


	51. On the outside

Lex’s Lab National city (National City) 01-06-2020 Earth Prime 09:10………

Lex had wanted to stay in the room, she hadn't wanted to stay there for the reasons that she thought she would, she knew that with Alex and Lena in there everything would be done perfectly acceptably, that the truth rock would be tested that there would be an adequate analysis of the effects on the kryptonian ability to lie, not that Lex was overly confident in her ability to lie with or without the rock. She knew that both Lena and Alex were scientists, that they understood the importance of empirical research and recording accurate data. No this wasn't why she wanted to be in there. She moved through to the seats by the computer terminal in the other lab and sat down crossing her legs as she rested her chin on her hand. She wasn't interested in the inner workings of the woman's mind either, not really, sure that although she came from an advanced civilisation she was not overly interested in science. She rambled a lot and that was just well frustrating to her, why did she have to speak for ten minutes for a simple answer. She was not going to be unloading information about technologies or unknown science with her, and Lex as much as she would like that she wasn't sure that Kara had the knowledge.

Lex absently looked to the chair next to her, it was where Alex normally sat when they were working, she had been having less and less time working with her, between the superfriends project that took her away at times and the DEO demanding more attention now that Alex poached some of the best agents including Vasquez who was taking on a lot of her responsibility. She knew that it made sense given the variables and the options available there is no way that Alex would trust other team leaders in the super friends to be anything less that the level of Alex. Vasquez had proved herself to be every bit as capable as Alex, although not nearly as interesting. She sighed, it was another thing that she had to get used to, not having Alex with her in the lab. This was something that was harder to manage than she had expected, after all there was a heavy feeling when Alex was not there, it was like the woman had the ability to take the weight off her. The DEO was ticking along with Brainy as director but between them neither were really good with the more emotional need of the agents. It was this that made her want to be in that room.

It was a day that she wouldn't normally see Alex but that was less unnerving than being here alone knowing that Alex was in that room and she was here on the outside. Lex had been on the outside all her life, when she was a child being locked into her own mind and unable to communicate, she was on the outside then, no one took notice of her until her mother decided to get her out and functioning. Then through school she was the brilliant nerd sitting away from others, she had no interest in them and they had little in her, not that it was an issue, but she was again on the outside. That continued all her life, but then she liked the fact that she was not having to pretend, she hated the gala’s and the meetings and the times that she had to pretend to be interested in the mediocrity masquerading as intelligence. The people who thought that they were deeper and more relevant than they really were. It was amazing to her that these people who were really very inconsequential came along with the biggest egos that needed constant validation and stroking, not that she was of any particular predilection to do that.

The years in the sanitarium that she was locked in once again had been horrific and unpalatable in many ways due to the treatment, meant that she was not bothered with the constant need for her to pretend. However she had missed Lena, she had always been connected with her in a million ways, she liked her connection with her sister. She was brilliant and interesting and found ways to bring her into the room. This was a Lena day they were supposed to be having brunch, again she thought without any irony, it wasn't the lack of that routine that was bothering her. She sighed, it was that moment, that moment in the lab as she was leaving that grasp of her wrist. The way that Alex had held her firm, the defined strokes of her thumb, that look in her eye, she had seen it so many times, but Alex had never closed the distance, never kissed her. Maybe that look wasn't what Lex had thought but whatever Alex was trying to convey that look did things to her. It was the way her stomach pulled, her heart seemed to race and feel like it was too big for her chest. How her mind would still and all the millions of thoughts running through her at any given moment would slow and calm, how she would be lost in the eyes and things were quiet. 

Lex craved those moments, it was so undeniably a effect of her inconsistent variable, the way that as much as Alex was undeniably the most frustrating and unquantifiable and enigmatic person that she had ever met, those moments when she looked at her like that gave her a sense of peace that she had never had. The world was not so bright, so loud, her head was quiet, her skin stopped protesting at the touch of her clothing. She would have a true moment of stillness and be enveloped in this feeling that she couldn't explain, as much as she could describe the impact, the feeling, it eluded her even after all this time. She didn't like to attribute emotions to herself but she had a curiosity about this one, this feeling seemed to take root over her entire being, she would have intense reactions to things, but this was different it seemed to have a reaction on her whole body, there was not a thought in her mind that could explain it. The more this happened the more that she realised that it was this feeling that was causing her the distress at the moment, Alex was right there right behind that door but she was in here, spinning into her own mind unable to bring herself to concentrate on anything other than the simple and basic fact that she is on the outside, and what she wants is to be in that Room in the presence of Alex. 

They would be leaving the Lab soon, it wouldn't be long, it was only supposed to be a quick test something that showed that she had no intent when it came to Kara something to help put her mind at ease, she would show her the way that the rocks could be neutralised next time, without infecting her, she would show on a plant. That would show that without any negative effect she could control the impact of the rock. This was Lena’s impact on the experiments, she didn't mind, of course she would want to ensure that she was safe and comfortable, she had done the same for her. The introduction to Kara had been slow and short expanding over the last two months until last night when they all met. Lex appreciated this, they did everything scientifically, they measured the effects on Lex introducing the super into her life, the impact on the medication that Lena had constructed for her, and the way they needed to modify the treatment for less calm interactions. Not that there had been anything overly aggressive or trying, but the first time that she had to switch and fly away had caused Lex to fall into a negative space.

It wasn't like she didn't know the truth, it wasn't like she had not seen her in both personas, it was the sudden change in the routine they had been working on with a change in her persona and the fact that Alex and her had both left. Lex had Lena though who instantly wrapped around her as she started counting. That was her sister, she was way to good, too pure to hold the name, to have Lillian as a mother, sure Lena had a darker side to her brilliance, the revenge she took on the super was beautiful and poetic in the most dark way, and she had set up their mother, she was not a soft and defenceless creature by any imagination but she could have been so much more without the negative impacts. In honesty Lex was not sure if it was even the super that caused the issue that night, her current predicament was most definitely connected to Alex, would she have had the same reaction if Alex had been left behind? That feeling of Alex being out of sight, out fighting, possibly not coming back was something that Lex had struggled with a lot. She was almost positive that this was the cause of the sudden instability that night, although Lena’s action pulled her back.

Lex needed to focus on something there was no reason for this train of thought it was an inefficient use of her time, the feelings or actions of her so called emotions were irrelevant, there was nothing that she could do about the situation, they were in there, she was out here. She glanced at the time it was close to ten already, they needed to be out of the lab for her ten thirty brunch, she was starting to feel the familiar feeling of her mind pushing against her, she was tapping already and had not even noticed. She wanted to get back in the room, put things away and get back to her schedule, if she was not going to get the feeling of Alex, she wanted to have the normality of her time with Lena. She hoped that this relationship with Kara would still leave time for Lena to complete their now familiar schedule. She could feel her stomach tightening her heart feeling heavier still and the thoughts in her mind getting louder, she looked around a little wild eyed as she tried to pinpoint the last treatment. There was a noise that jilted her out of her mind for a brief moment as the door opened and they all flitted into the room.

The moment that Lena entered the room she could hear the tapping, she could see the look on Lex’s face, she knew that this would be a lot for her too, maybe she should have insisted on being out here with Lex during the trial, but she was curious, had she inadvertently made things worse for her sister by leaving her out here. She noticed the way her lips were moving but her eyes were unfocused, she knew that they were pushing the treatment, she should have had one before trying this. If Lexi was hurt by this she wouldn't forgive herself. She was about to race to herside when she spotted Alex with a worried look on her face and moved to Lexi. Lena watched in fascination as Alex sat next to her closer than Lexi would normally allow, and she took the wrist of the hand tapping and just held it, then she slowly turned to look at Lexi. Lexi had looked down at the hand grasping hers and then slowly moved her gaze up the arm to the face of the person in her space. Alex’s turn seemed to be perfectly timed so as Lexi made eye contact, “what the hell” she thought to herself Lexi made eye contact, Alex was looking at her, the neutral expression on Alex’s face softened and turned into a small smile, that was slowly mirrored on Lexi’s face.

Lena glanced at Kara who was also watching, enraptured with the look that was happening between the other two. Although she seemed to recognise the move, clearly she had adapted it from times with Kara as a child, and it was working for Lexi, and it was really working. Once Lexi had stilled and was smiling softly, Alex had suggested they put things away she would explain the results and then she could go to brunch with Lena. She watched as Lex nodded and then stood Alex still holding her wrist and they moved into the other room. It wasn't until Lexi was clearly engaged with the activity that Alex let go, and she did it in a way that was almost affectionate, something that she knew wouldn't be the norm for Lexi but she said nothing just moved into the other lab further to the couch guiding Kara.

“Your sister is amazing Kara. I have never seen Lexi respond so quickly”

“Alex may be a pining, gay mess, but she knows instinctivly how to sooth others, a badass with a massive heart.”

Alex had gone through the information, the inability of Kara to put the rock down when she clearly wanted to stop talking was the same effect as on Alex and Lex, the level of truth and the ambiguity seemed to be the same also, Kara had been unable to lie when in contact with it. Lex had nodded along as she put away everything and then looked at the information that she was given. She smiled, this could potentially have uses, but then again they needed to ensure that it was something that could be used with restrictions. Alex rubbed her hand over the back of her neck wondering how best to approach things with Lex. She decided that it was something that she would only work out with more information, and it should come from Lex, what she was willing to share. She decided a question about the date that never happened was safe enough.

“When I asked you to the bar for a drink, why did you say no?”

Lex looked up at Alex, it wasn't often that she asked her direct questions like this, they talked a lot while working in the lab, they had so much in common surprisingly and the more that she had learned about her the more that Alex had intrigued her, she was an almost constant part of her thoughts and mental activities. She had become accustomed to her bring in her life, she worked with her each day Monday to friday. When the superfriends things happened and Alex had to take off, it was the agreement, but every time it caused Lex some distress. She had initially thought that it was just the disruption to her normal routine, but after some more examination and the conversation with Lena about it, she had come to the point to the belief, no that was not right is was a tried and tested hypothesis, it was a conclusion a proven one, as much as she didnt like to attribute the emotion to herself. She was concerned and anxious, that Alex would not come back, she loved her, she had made a number of new items for the superfriends including more protection for the agents, mainly so Alex had it. 

She didn't like the feeling of being unable to stop thinking about Alex, it was the same when she couldn't stop thinking about Lena. Her stomach would twist, her hands were sweaty and fidgety, she would be distracted and almost clumsy. The normal routine the pathway designed for Alex being left devoid of stimulation. She didn't know what prompted this question, was there something more to the initial request that she had missed, she scanned through her memory, there was no significance to the date, there was no context to the drink, there had been no information to say that it was important in any way. An uneasy feeling gripped her stomach and her heart squeezed, she was nauseous, had she missed something.

“Well as I recall we had a difficult week, we had been working late, it was a friday and we finished at six thirty, on a friday you normally have a movie or game night with your sister that starts at seven and I have a reservation at CharMichaels at the same time, there was only thirty minutes between the question and the pre-existing commitments, meaning that even if I was able to get you into Charmichales in the skinny Jeans and retro ACDC t shirt in Blue, you would not have had time to finish it before heading to your sisters, it seemed like the timing was just not going to work out.”

Alex groaned internally, she had not been specific enough, clearly, she was intending to spend the evening with Lex, to have a date with Lex, of course that it was CharMichaels night, she had a standing reservation, and she had told her about movie and games nights, everything Lex said was a logical deduction from the information that she had given her. And why did Lex remember everything about what she was wearing? Clearly there was not a scrap of information that was lost in Lex, she says that she has no interest and doesn't take any notice of the people around her. That clearly was not the case with her, Lena and Kara were right Lex did like her back and it was her own clumsy communication that meant that Lex didn't realise that she was asking her out. 

She had been having such a good day that friday, they finally finished the project that had been troubling them. They had been chatting and excited about what this could mean and the light caught Lex’s face and took her breath away, she had swallowed harshly and realised that she didn't want to end the day, as Lex had laughed, something Alex didn't hear often but love so much, she had blurted out the invite spontaneously hoping to continue. She needed to find a way to ask her out and give her time to prepare for a change in routine. Lex wouldn't want a spur of the moment she needed time to adapt. Clear, concise,with purpose, with a few days to allow Lex to adjust to a change in her schedule, Alex could do this, if it meant more time with Lex she could be a little more vulnerable and open up a bit more. The train of thought was disrupted by Lena who looked in.

“The drivers are here, shall we head out? Kara’s stomach is already rumbling, you know how fidgety she gets when hungry”


	52. Just to be clear

Lex’s Lab National city (National City) 02-06-2020 Earth Prime 17:10………

Alex was hovering and procrastinating, she knew this, there was nothing that she could do to change that fact other than take the chance. She was sure now that she understood what was needed Lena had made it very pointedly clear, although she was doing it with a smile on her face Alex could tell that she was a little exasperated with her. She thought it was a tad hypocritical and a little unfair considering the years of pining that Lena and Kara had been doing. This had been three months, she knew that it was quick compared to them and with the other things that they were combating it could be considered too soon. However the thought that she could have missed her chance spurred her on, before Lex lost interest she needed to act, that was why she was still hovering at ten past five. She watched as Lex put away the latest samples and closed down the lab, heading out for the day it would seem. It had been a really good day, getting the samples from Lena before breakfast meant that they could make progress today. They had breakfast, it was great but Alex didn't think it was the time. They had lunch but still they had the rest of the day to work. She was a chicken, Badass Alex Danvers, was afraid to ask out the pretty woman.

“Hey, um Lex can I ask you something?”

Lex looked at her as she closed the final door and headed into the secondary lab, she tilted her head as she looked at Alex, it was not uncommon for her to ask questions, but she often just asked in the flow, this reminded her of another occasion, she supposed if it was the same kind of thing that it would be plausible that they could have a drink before she ate at Luchini’s her normal monday night spot. As far as she was aware there were no regular commitments on Alex’s side for a monday so that didn't need to be factored in, and they could just as easily go out as to have a drink in the lab. She looked up and caught Alex’s eyes, there was something there that wasn't normally, well not for a long time around her anyway, the twitch in her seventh quadrant and the displacement of her lower lip tentatively caught on her upper incisor suggested some kind of Anxiety. She smiled brightly before answering.

“I don't know can you? If you can, then you may, obviously following the one you just asked because asking if you can kind of makes the asking redundant don't you think?”

Alex had laughed, she corrected her grammar, gave her permission and a little sass at the same time, she was getting better at using humor however intellectually she did it, or was Alex just finding the odd attempts funny because of how she felt about her? She wasn't really sure but the sudden release of endorphins from the laughter helped put her at ease. Lex had walked over, she was wearing a stunning little combination today, how did she manage to pair skirts and a shirt in a way that made her look like some kind of walking violation, she really was stunning, as she sat on the chair next to Alex and her skirt lifted slightly to show the thigh underneath Alex was back to being nervous. She so wanted to play things cool but with the kind of wording that she needed she was going to sound like an idiot anyway. As long as Lex understood that was all that mattered. Tomorrow she was at the base so she had a day to get herself in check if this didn't work out. It was now or never she told herself.

“Lex, next Friday after work is finished I would like to take you to dinner, I am going to pay, and make reservations. I will pick you up from here, and take you to a restaurant, it will not be CharMichaels. I would like to classify the dinner as a date, the romantic kind, where I give you flowers and pull out your seat for you. The purpose of this date will be to spend time with you outside of work, and our family, to get to know you better, because I like you, and would like to be more than just your friend. You do not have to answer right away. I know that it is a change to your routine and if a week isnt enough time we can arrange it for a little later, if you want to.”

Lex listened to Alex, this was not what she was expecting her to ask, this was something so much more. She could feel her heart rate increase as it felt the muscle in her chest was growing and pushing against her ribs, her stomach was doing that strange thing, like fluttering muscles, but that made no sense really it wasn't her abdomen it was her stomach. She was being very specific about the date, the purpose and the desired outcome, how she was planning to behave, the only ambiguity in the question was the location, which meant that she was unsure how she should dress. She felt her mouth go dry and licked her lips to alleviate this peculiar feeling. She needed a little more information to know what to wear and other things about how she should act, but that was more a question for Lena.

“Well the next friday is in four days from now, four days is not a week, and although I understand the premise and the role that you are planning on playing in this event, without a location I am not sure what I should be wearing, I would also not know what the exit routes are, or if the staff are trustworthy. I would however agree to the date, if I can know where it would be”

Alex felt her heart sinking to start with, was this Lex’s polite and soft way to let her down? Was Kara and Lena wrong in their assertions that Lex liked her too. Then she was talking about the location and how that was a necessary piece of information that would help dictate her part in the date. She was not saying no, and then there was a tentative agreement with only one proviso, just one thing that Lex needed to say yes to a date with her. Alex could not believe what was happening, she smiled brightly, so wide that it almost hurt her cheeks to be smiling so wide. She was relieved and happy, more than happy she was ecstatic and she felt like jumping around or kissing her, or screaming, a fist pump anything to express how amazing it felt that Lex was saying yes. A sudden thought entered her mind, that she had not been clear that there was more than just one date, that she wanted, she had not expressly said that but she didn't want this to be one night, although she knew if that was all she would get she would take it. She took a deep breath and spoke a little less sure.

“Well I guess that is reasonable, I wanted it to be a surprise but there would potentially be other times I could surprise you maybe not with location though. I am going to book a private booth at L’Econtra, I know that on Friday you have steak and this is the best steak restaurant in National city. I didn't want it to be at your normal location because I want this to be associated with a date,and a change in the relationship, I am hoping that there will be many more dates.”

Alex sounded a little unsure about herself in the moment, was she wondering if she really wanted there to be more than one? Lex thought to herself for a moment and analysed her interactions with Alex, ever the inconsistent variable, but in this she had always seemed clear, she was a monogamous person and although Lex didn't feel judged when they talked about her history, Alex didn't seem to share her feelings on ethical promiscuity, she smiled softly as she realised she was clarifying that she didn't want to have a one night stand, that she was not asking her out for sex. She tilted her head as she looked at Alex and moved her hand to take Alex's threading their hands together, she winced a little as their fingers slid between each other, but once settled she held with a little more pressure to avoid the pain.

“I would like that Alex, and I will be more than happy to go on a date with you on Friday.”

Alex watched as she moved her hand into hers, the wince, she knew that it was a little painful, she remembered the way that she did this with Lena too, sacrificed her own comfort momentarily to give Lena something that she wanted. Alex smiled brightly and nodded at her squeezing her hand a little harder to convey the thanks and the warmth she felt in the moment.

“I will book for seven and pick you up here at six thirty, now before I do something dumb to embarrass myself I am going to head off, I have plans to make”

Alex leaned forward and kissed Lex’s cheek, letting go of her hand and heading to the elevator, the kiss had been a touch off painful, it was nice, she watched her leave and couldn't help but smile as she heard the whoop from the Elevator, she wouldn't tell Alex she heard that, after all she had planned to leave before embarrassing herself, she assumed that that reaction was something that Alex would feel was embarrassing. Lex sat and placed her hand to her cheek, the kiss that had been the right side of pain still seemed to be tingling on her cheek, then she started to analyse things, there was so many things, she was clear it was not a one night thing, so it wasnt for sex, it was dinner, so she would need to dress for it, would there be more hand holding? Kisses? What was expected on a first date that was supposed to last more than one night, she really was not sure how to proceed with this. She picked up her phone and invited Lena to dinner.

Lex to Lena bean: Lena I need to talk to you please join me for dinner at Luchini’s at seven.

Lena’s office National city (National City) 02-06-2020 Earth Prime 18:00………

Lena had finished in the office nad was thinking about heading down to the lab to start on the next round of testing for the cells her and Kara were making, she wanted to see if the gel that Lex had mentioned would help, she was very interested in the thought of a kryptonite infusion that would increase the batteries storage, if they were able to hold more than her hypotheses they would really change the face of eco friendly power. She felt the small gust of wind that meant that Kara was there and turned looking at her beautiful girlfriend who was smiling brightly as always. She heard the beep from her phone and winked before kissing Kara softly and then looked down at the screen. Her brows pulled together as she read the message, then Kara’s phone went off and Lena looked up.

“Oh my Rao, Lena you're not going to believe this, she listened she finally listened, Alex asked Lex out, and she said yes, oh Rao Alex is happy, she sent emojis, and her heart rate is through the roof.”

Lena relaxed her brows and looked up at Kara, eyes crinkling with the smile on her face, she threw her arms around Kara. She pulled her in for a big hug and kissed her fiercely. She was so happy for them, she knew Kara wasnt all the way there yet but she was closer now than she had ever been. Plus the information from Kara stopped her rising panic as she read Lexi’s message. Kara had moved her to the desk and casually sat her back onto it. Wrapping her legs around her waist she moaned lightly into the kiss which meant that Kara’s tongue slipped into her mouth. The kiss was heated and passionate, Lena gripped at her back and pulled her closer. She lost her mind in Kara, she just wanted to go home and spend an evening in the arms of her lover. Then she remembered the text and pulled back panting lightly.

“I, we need to stop, um, I don't want to but I need to respond to Lexi, and she needs me to meet her for dinner, at least thanks to Alex I know that this isn't bad. I was a little concerned when she asked me to meet her for dinner. You ok with this right?”

“That you stopped kissing me to talk about your sister, no, that she is stealing you away when I had other things on my mind, no. However if you mean Alex and Lex, you know I think I am, I know that there is a long way to go with me and Lex, but Alex loves her, and I really do believe that Lex loves her. I want my sister to be as happy as I am with you, if that means dating Lex, I can be on board with that, after all Luthor women have that reaction on us Danvers girls.”

Kara’s soft expression as she was talking about Lexi, and of course her personal effect on National cities hero she couldn't help but feel the desire to continue what they had just started, it was a little fantasy of hers to be taken in her office and well Kara had already sat her on the desk. She bit her lip and looked up at Kara, her eyes hooded, her pupils blown. She pulled her forward and nipped up her neck then licked over the point, heading to her ear. She bit the lobe, and then whispered.

“I have to be at Luchini’s at seven, its six fifteen, I have always wanted you to take me here, like this, be quick but not too quick and we can have it all tonight.”

Kara didn't need to be told twice she had always wanted to take her this way too, she pulled her off the desk and turned her, slipping her hands up her skirt threading her fingers around the thin lace of her panties and sliding them down Lena’s thighs, pushing the skirt up higher she bent Lena over the desk. Lena’s hand gripped the side, her knuckles white, heart racing in anticipation of what was about to happen. She had dreamed about this for years, with that she felt the skirt shift and the cold air hit her ass as Kara slapped Lena's ass a couple of times before blowing some cooling breath over it. She then slowly threaded her fingers through her wet slit. Both actions caused a delicious moan to fall from Lena, Kara moaned lightly as she pushed into her and took her over the desk.

She set a pace to bring her up quickly for the first time, but she wanted to relish Lena, she wished there was not a time limit on this particular fantasy, after she brought her quickly to the edge she slipped her finger around and pinched her clit sending her over the edge. Listening to the screams of Lena as she tumbled into her first orgasm, she was not satisfied though she wanted to taste her too, she was not going to miss this opportunity. She sat her back and sank between her thighs spurred on by the moans to pleasure her, she nipped at the soft flesh on her thighs and sucked a mark into the apex of her hip, before she moved to run her tongue through her and then latched on to her clit, vibrating her tongue on the heightened nerves bringing her to the edge, she puffed a little cooling and brought her back, on the third time Lena was begging her to let her cum. She flicked her clit a few times with a little more dedication bringing her to a second orgasm.

Lena rested for a few moments, but she was eager to get her hands on Kara. she pulled Kara up and whispered in her ear, her eyes were comically wide for a few beats but then she nodded and moved. Kara had hovered above Lena as she lay on her desk, riding her face, Lenas tongue and fingers finding her already close from the earlier activities, she loved that Kara could get so close just by pleasuring her, and occasionally would cum with her just through that enjoyment, not that that ever stopped her taking her turn, she pushed harder and lapped at her, Kara came hard, then Lena shifted giving her a similar treatment that she gave her, enjoying watching Kara splayed over her desk, she rocked into her using her hip to add pressure as she pushed in setting a quick pace as she curled her fingers, and wondered if she could make sure that there were a few toys in the office just in case for the future. Kara came hard the second time but before she could come down fully a beep interrupted them. Lena panting over her back as she kissed her neck, picked up her phone.

“Fuck I am late, Miss Danvers, you are going to be the death of me, Just to be clear Kara, that was amazing but, please get me to the restaurant before Lexi goes into melt down.”

Kara whimpered but tore herself from the desk, she sped to the wash room and grabbed some wipes to help Lena freshen up and handed Lena her panties, she watched as she slipped them on knowing that she was going to be somewhat uncomfortable at dinner. She looked at Kara who lifted her up bridal style, she could feel Kara’s heart pounding in her chest and loved that she had caused her to be so excited, Kara held her close and flew to the location. Landing in an alley just off to the side, Kara pulled her in and kissed her, before clearing the mess of lipstick.

“Just to be clear to you, you Miss Luthor, owe me a do over that, was not long enough to truly fulfill all my fantasies.”

Lena stood as Kara flew off mouth gaping, she thought she was the only one that had them, she couldn't wait to see what else Kara had in mind. She checked herself and headed around to the entrance, Lexi was not going to be happy with her being late.


	53. Intimacy Luthor style

Luchini’s National city (National City) 02-06-2020 Earth Prime 19:05………

Lena stepped into the restaurant and could feel the eyes on her, she was used to the retrospective hate, the looks she was a Luthor after all but there was something more in the air. She could feel the anxiety crackling around the room, it was like the feeling before a storm. The electricity in the air, the pressure, it was stifling. She knew that she was late and that would have upset Lex, after all she had the same upbringing as Lex, timeliness was of utmost importance in the Luthor house. If you were late there were consequences, late for dinner you didn't eat, late for an outing you didnt go, Lena had been frequently late as a child, she was four and the complete change of expectations, clothes and the lack of help meant that she struggled. If it had not been for Lexi she would have probably missed out on more meals than she had.

Lexi had taken to getting ready early and then going to Lena to help her get ready, showing her how to tie her shoes, how to do her hair in an acceptable way for their mother, she helped her until she could manage herself, and even then she would arrive ten minutes before they had to be assessed by Lillian to ensure that she was ready and they would be on time. Lena couldn't help but wonder if she would have made it through her childhood without Lexi. As she rounded the corner heading towards the table she knew that Lexi would be at she could see a very nervous looking server, observing Lexi. Lena looked, she was tapping twins with both hands, this was worrying, her blank stare boring into the far wall, her gaze disconnected from her. She leaned to the waiter and ordered two of Lexi’s normal meals and a bottle of her wine before slipping into the booth. Taking both of her hands in her own and squeezing.

“Lexi I am sorry that I am late, I lost track of time”

Lex had stiffened then stilled at Lena’s touch she could smell the musky after sex scent coming off her and raised her brow, she was irritated not because Lena had been having sex as she was finding herself in a spiralling panic but because she was late, she would have preferred Lena to tell her that she couldnt make it and waited till breakfast than her be late, and Lex to know that she had interrupted her sister and became a burden to her. Lionels voice rang through her head, “it is not a Luthor” “it is broken” “it is a burden” “dispose of it and move on Lillian, it will never be anything” Luthor’s were proud and didn't ask for help, they were strong and independent, not a burden and here was Lex, weak and panicking, burdening her sister when she clearly had better things to be doing.

“Lena bean, you were clearly enjoying yourself and had other plans, I can smell the scent on you and you shouldn't have let me burden you, we have breakfast planned for the morning, you should have told me the truth that you and Kara were busy, I am well aware of the need to manage our more base line carnal desires, it isn't like I would have not understood that, there is nothing wrong with an active and healthy sex life between consenting adults.”

Lena looked at Lexi, she had clearly not done a great job in cleaning up, and that had caused Lexi more anxiety. She wasn’t embarrassed by Lex knowing what she had been up to, they had never shied away from conversations about sex or any other biological process, the benefits of being scientists she thought. She squeezed her wrist and looked into her sister's eyes connecting with her for a moment, she wanted Lexi to hear her. She was sorry for being late, she really was, she should have kept time better. Sex with Kara was still new and exciting, the honey moon phase was definitely something that she was planning to enjoy.

“Lexi, you are not now, nor ever have you been a burden, without you supporting me and helping me when I arrived at the Luthor mansion I don't think that I would have survived. Kara and I, it's still new, and before Kara it had been a long time, I guess we are just making up for lost time and a lot of frustration, that doesn't mean that I was too busy for you Lexi, not now not ever. We take care of each other, and right now, I want you to know you have all my attention.”

Lex could feel her heart rate lowering with the continued pressure from Lena’s hands holding her wrist and she took some breaths to steady herself further. She needed Lena to help her with this she was not in familiar waters there was no rule book, oh she had been looking, first date, kiss no kiss, third date sex no sex, fifth date sex no sex, there was nothing that gave her a clear plan, there was no relationship agreement ever written for that damn show, she had scowered the internet and there were tiny fragments, where there was a change or a breach, an expectation that needed to be filled, the only thing about sex was a once a year commitment on the birthday, but that didnt tell her how long, what to do or anything. The more research that she had done into the expectations of dating the more confused that she became, and by the time she had sat down in the restaurant she was a mess. She needed to understand the intricacies of human behaviour, of human emotions, of human interactions, and well that was not something that she was capable of. All the social lessons and rules that her mother had impressed on her were useless, and the two relationships she had been in had been a spectacular failure.

“I have three days, three days, ninety six hours well ninety five hours and fifty three minutes and then I am going to be on a date, and I have no idea what I am supposed to do, how do I know if it is a date where there will be physical expectations, Kissing, sex, this base system is confusing and I have no idea what is acceptable, there are no rules to this there are no standards, LenaBean, I dont know if I can do this, but its Alex and I want her”

Lex shifted in her chair and moved back as the food and wine arrived, she had not ordered it, she raised a brow and the waiter put the food on the table scampering off as quickly as he had appeared. Lex was still thinking trying to plan through her confusion and articulate herself better with this level of energy running through her, and her fathers words, her first lovers words in her head, the silky tone to them, “Lex you are pathetic, you have no idea what love is” “Lex it's simple I want you to want to be here not at the lab” “lex this is ridiculous I have work for god's sake give me some space” Lex had found nothing but conflict and contradiction in all her interactions and now she could lose Alex because of it.

“I can not do what I normally do, not with Alex, she is not an anonymous willing participant in my need to satiate my body's needs. It is not like I have no understanding of that, she is not that, and that isn't why I said yes. I am well versed in that aspect, when the muscles of my body and my mind are preoccupied with the physical need to release, I am well aware of how to satisfy that, the contracts are standard the explanation is easy and when my body has relaxed and my mind is back to what it should be whoever the facilitator of that is, leaves never to be seen again, but that is not what I want, I mean it is, but it isn't, I haven't done that in a very long time, and there has been a growing need, but Alex is not a facilitator and I am in no mind to allow her to just slip away. I need to know what is expected and when, when I need to do things.”

“Lexi you're talking about it like a clinical procedure, there is a broken bone we set it, there is a chemical deficiency we replicate it. That is not what Sex is like when there are feelings involved. It is so much more. I don't even understand how you have not moved forward from that very clinical standpoint. Don't you enjoy it? Everyone you have been with most definitely has, do you have any idea what the expectations were like for me at school after you? People think i live in the shadow of the Luthor name, I do but the biggest shadow is cast by your sexual prowess, do you have any idea the kinds of things that people said about you, your reputation in the bedroom is legendary, everyone wanted to try the new Luthor out when I arrived to see if I had the same predilections and skills.”

Lex looked up at her, she thought about her time at school, there was a lot of experimentation in her earlier years, the hormones kicking in gave her a boost in that particular department and she had a insatiable appetite, she was more than aware of her reputation, she was the same then, however one night is all anyone got, but it didn't stop them lining up when it was clear that she was looking, this was before it needed to be anonymous, and she had to employ NDA’s before she became hated. She smiled and looked at Lena, she could tell that as frustrated as Lena must have been coming to a school that she had ruled as the younger sister, and she had left quite the legacy. The look on her face also gave off something like pride. She put a few mouthfuls in her mouth and sat back a little.

“Well my love of patterning and repetition comes in very handy in some circumstances, I have found that balance and repetition does wonders on a woman's body, sometimes I am pretty sure that the NDA isnt needed as the women can barely remember their own name when they leave. However I am not convinced that I can rely on that with Alex, she is not accustomed to one night arrangements, and wouldn't be interested, I also have no desire to have her to have her leave after, but I have no idea what the expectations on me are”

Lena looked at Lexi and grinned, she was sure that there was more to it than Lexi’s love of repetition and patterns, the way that people had spoken about her had made her blush, she wasnt of the same delicate disposition now, but as a fourteen year old in a new environment there was definitely things she should not have heard. She thought about what Lexi was saying, she wanted a relationship with Alex, she wanted to know what order to do things, when it is appropriate to allow her “inner sexual guru” out. It wasn’t a way that she wanted to think of Lexi, but it was the only name that she could manage, “sex god” “fucktastic” “Miss Lover Luthor” “the lady whisperer” the worst was the “exceptional cunnilinguist” Lena a stuttering gay mess around a pretty girl in boarding school found that one particulally hurtful. Lexi wanted a standard set of rules, clearly, that was how she survived social situations but there just were not any for this situation. 

“Lexi you're not going to like this, not at all but it is the truth, there are no rules, you do things as you feel comfortable, if both of you want to kiss, you kiss, sex is something else, some people build up to it, some people are happy to jump right in, and well as for the bases, your source material seems to have come from a frat boy play book. Although I am not exactly the poster child for relationship advice, what did Alex say?”

She ran over Alex’s words there were definite markers that she talked about but there was nothing in there about what Lex was expected to do, she could infer from the parts that were Alex’s, she was to be ready to be picked up, she was going to receive flowers, she was going to be taken out, Alex was going to seat her, so she needed to sit, Alex was paying and then taking her home. She looked at Lena. There was no clarity anywhere, not online, not in Alex’s words, not in Lena’s words. She thought about Alex and the almost kiss, she had wanted her to kiss her, she wanted to feel Alex’s soft lips on her own. There were days in the lab that she wanted to do more than that, it was the first stirring of her need to be satiated, she was not sure how long she would be able to continue with this without satisfying her needs.

“She said she wanted to take me on a romantic date, she would pick me up, give me flowers, pull my chair and pay. I wanted her to kiss me, two months ago, I thought that she was going to, and she makes me want more too. She is very aesthetically pleasing, she is intelligent and interesting and she has a quality about her that I can't explain it makes it hard sometimes to concentrate.”

Lena knew about the almost kiss, she had heard what Kara had talked about with Lexi, she saw the desire in her sisters eyes, Alex was definitely an attractive woman, and well Lexi had always been the person that attracted beautiful women. Her reputation literally gave her the pick of anyone, even straight women wanted to have a try with her, but the thought of Lexi being in the position she was in now was different. She wanted to be with Alex. She was attracted to her, but not pursuing her, she was in a familiar position, Lena remembers the level of frustration that she had with Kara over the years, that was possibly why they were so active now, Kara had felt it too.

“Lexi, she had given you the outline where she is the one in charge, so she will be the one to make the move if there is going to be one, I understand the frustration the inability to concentrate that was what I was like with Kara, she was a useless gibbering wreck when I flirted with her, and there were times when I wanted to just kiss her but I didn't, however with Alex, I think your going to have to let her make the first move and then continue with what feels right. I would tell you to talk to her about it, but I have seen what happens when the Danvers girls try to talk sex. Seriously it's all blushing, and stuttering, with she slept overs, and excited jumping around, and bleaching eyeballs I mean their mother is a Doctor, I have no idea why it is so hard but there is nothing that they can’t do together except talk about sex”

Lex thought about that for a moment, that was not the experience that she had with Alex, they had talked about sex, Alex talking about Maggie and asking about her sex life, they had discussions about it, Alex didnt seem to be particulally effected by it, she tilted her head and put her fork down, drawing her brows together, she had found Alex quite articulate, maybe Lena was referring more to Kara than Alex? Maybe it was more of a sister thing? She knew that they wouldn't be able to move forward with any kind of relationship on the physical side if Alex was unable to think and talk about it with her. After all she had specific needs, and things that would need to be understood or things could be very unpleasant. She needed an answer to this that made more sense, was it Alex, was it Kara, or was it hearing about her sister in a sexual context.

“Alex seems to be able to hold a conversation about sex, the first morning we had breakfast she told me about the night before, an interaction with Maggie, then she has asked about my ethical promiscuity. Is Kara able to talk to you about it?”

Lena thought about it for a moment, Kara had been a little shy about it to start with but recently she had been expressing more desires and flirting, another she would blush and stumble when talking about Alex and Lexi, the conversations over the past years had always flowed better when Alex was not there but she had not thought about that specifically, she looked up at Lexi, she supposed that they did have a more clinical matter of fact way of discussing things with each other, Lexi’s condition and both of them being more scientific. She thought back to how embarrassing it had been during school to start with. Between the Luthor training, the Luthor house, the walls that she built quickly receded and the scientist in her took over. Kara and Alex were much more like normal siblings, did normal sisters talk about sex? She knew the story of Alex, and how uncomfortable she had been with her sexuality, how it had taken nearly thirty years to be comfortable with herself. If she was that uncomfortable she wouldn't have found talking about it easy. Kara who came from a completely different world wouldn't have understood, maybe just maybe that's why they were so uncomfortable with it.

“You know, I think that they struggle with each other because they have never talked about it, Kara is getting better, but her understanding is different being from a different background, I remember her being very confused as to why Alex had to come out. I think that talking to Alex if she is able would be the best, I am not talking about a relationship agreement or making a plan, I know that you would be more comfortable with rules set out, but that is not going to work here Lexi. Just talk to her as for Friday, she wants to take you but if she doesn't kiss you and you want to kiss her ask.”

“Just ask? You really think it is that simple?”


	54. Intimacy is not the Danvers style

Super base (National City) 06-06-2020 Earth Prime 12:00………

Kara had been expecting a call or a text from Alex, but she had not expected it to take four days, Lena and her had talked about how Lex was doing with it, she had needed an instant intervention which she had been expecting from her sister but nothing, for four days she had been waiting for the awkward conversation with her sister about the date. It was normally her that panicked over this but she knew that this was different and that Lex was different. With her difficulties, she knew that Alex would be worried about her reactions, and she knew that they had similarities, she had expected something but it was four days. If she had waited four days she would have been vibrating through the walls. So when the text finally came in with a request for lunch the day of the date Kara had breathed a sigh of relief that it was finally going to be done and out the way. It wasn't that she was a prude, her and Lena had been enjoying their new found dimensions to their relationship. She had not really known anything about sex, and then Alex was so awkward about it that she thought for a long time that Earth was a lot like Krypton, that sex was very taboo. It wasn't but it was backwards when it came to love and who you could and couldn't love. College had opened her eyes but it was a bridge that her and Alex had not crossed.

Alex had been flying high for days, Lex had said yes she was over the moon, she thought that she could have flown away easily enough even if she wasn't the Danvers sister that could actually fly. It was more intense than Maggie, more intense than Kelly, there was something so special and amazing about the relationship that was developing with Lex. on paper it shouldn't have worked, but the honesty and the way that they had developed the trust they had, was beautiful, tentative and slow both having to work through issues to get to where they were. Alex readressing her judgments and realising that just because something can hurt Kara it didn't mean that it couldn't help, Lex letting her guard down and trusting her, feeling something less than a villain. Alex had moved to a position that something casual would be ok, but she would prefer something permanent, and Lex she seemed to have made the transition too. They made each other better, they compromised and Alex who had always felt less than was always enough for Lex, and it was the most amazing feeling. She was watching her life in technicolour. She wanted to sing and dance. Then there was Friday morning.

Alex had woken feeling great and excited, there were a small amount of nerves but they were firmly in check because as much as she was always nervous before a date she was not nervous about Lex, she was amazed at just how sure that she was that Lex and her were a match, she was drinking coffee when it happened, she was fanning through their relationship, all the soft touches all the conversations, the invites to dinner, the long lunches, the way that Lex had been so focused on keeping her safe that she was hold up in the lab for weeks. Then the thought drifted to the kiss that didn't happen and Alex smiled at the thought of kissing her, how soft her lips looked, how beautiful she was, what it would be like to run her fingers over her...that was the point the panic hit, her coffee cup fell and smashed on the floor, the conversation in CharMichaels, when Alex was told firm and with purpose. Her mind has flitted at that time to what it would be like to have sex with Lex. she was a badass but she wasn't like that in the bedroom, Did Lex have a domination kink? Would she need to be hurt to feel things? She had not thought about it, all the things she wanted to do with Lex, what if none of it was possible because of her sensitivity.

She had text Kara asking her to meet her at the superbase for lunch, she needed to talk to someone and well Kara she had her own issues not that Alex wanted to think about what her and Lena get up to. How had she not thought about this? How had she been drifting around for the last four days not thinking about what happens at the end of a date. Of course she was thinking about it, but not the logistics, she had scoped out the restaurant, picked the location based on Lex’s needs reserved the specific table, researched the flowers, she knew that Lex would know what they were and what they meant, Lena sure as hell did, it was a wealth thing she assumed or a genius thing, but she knew that she had to be careful and go for meaning. She had found a place that they could dress up a little but she wouldn't feel uncomfortable. The timing, the traffic, the need for changing time, everything was created with a perfect logistical plan, like a Superfriends operation, to be executed perfectly. Not once had she thought about the logistics of kissing Lex. It was noon, she looked up where Kara was, she puffed out a breath and turned to pace back the way she came.

“Kara finally, can we eat in the quiet room?”

Kara knew that the quiet room that was prepared for her by lena was for days when things were too much and she needed to meditate or calm without the noise of the world assaulting her, it was soundproof in and out meaning that Alex wanted to talk and this was not a conversation that she wanted others to hear. She knew it was coming she had known since the moment that Lena had told her about Lex and her, but she was still not prepared for it, even though she had been waiting and expecting it for four days. She had information from Alex and Lena about Lex and her sensitivities, it isn't the same as her, there are distinctive differences, she wasn't sure how Lex would feel about other things but there was no way that she could know that without Lex explaining it to her. Maybe if she can open up to Alex a little bit she could give an idea. She nodded and walked forward with the food following Alex into the room, the moment the door closed she was grabbed by her sister into a tight hug. She just stood and held her until she let go.

“Kara I um, I am freaking out a little, I have a date tonight with Lex as you know, I have done everything I can to make the place perfect, the table is in the perfect location the place isn't too noisy or bright, I have had them order her normal win, man that shit is expensive, and then I have got the flowers on order, everything is times to perfection, I am going to walk her home after and then I was going to kiss her and say good night but then, this morning I realised I don't know how, I mean I know how to kiss I just don't know how to kiss her.”

Shoot Kara thought to herself, but then of course Alex would have already done everything that was possible to make Lex comfortable and happy on their date, but that meant that all the softer topics were already taken care of and that means that the only place they have to go is right to the point. This was not something that had ever been a comfortable topic, Kara wanted to help her but this wasn't going to be easy for either of them and the way that Alex was already tinged with red and not looking at her said that Alex was finding this a little difficult too. She pulled her down to the floor and handed her the bag of food, taking out her own burger and sitting with her back against the wall staring at the spot over on the other side of the wall.

“This is about her sensory issues huh…..”

Kara felt Alex shift slightly and nod her head. She knew that this was what Alex wanted to talk about and could hear the up tick in her heart, hell she could hear the blood rushing to her sisters cheeks as she took a breath.

“She can't have people touch her normally, it hurts her, physically, like a soft touch is painful, she said that she needed to be touched with pressure with purpose and that she needed things to be harder. I haven't thought about the logistics of that, um, you know that I am a badass in the black and blue, but there is a difference between taking down an alien hostile and being with someone I care about. I um, I never enjoyed things when they were too forceful, and that was a issue with M… never mind, I am not her I can't do that to someone I can't be harsh and rough, if Lex was to stay over I, I don't think I can be that and that isn't even the main issue Kara, how, how do I say goodnight and end the date, if a kiss is going to hurt god this is a mess Kara what do I do?”

Kara knew that Maggie was rough with Alex, she knew that she had hurt her and that it wasn't her sister, they had never talked about it and she was not going to ask any questions about it now, Alex was already asking about sex and she was not sure that she wanted to have this conversation with her, what if she said the wrong thing and Alex shut down again? What if her understanding was not good enough still, she still thought in Kryptonian ways, and that was different to earth. She took a final bite of her burger and then took a deep breath.

“Well um, I…. I know that there is a difference, um, there is a reason that I um, I worry about touch, and um, intimate things…. Rao, the way I touch and the way I feel is different. I can see the microscopic detail of the ridges, I can feel them but its feather light, the harder I press to feel the more it crumbles. I can feel the difference in the softness of skin and the softness of metal, but everything feels soft, breakable. When things touch me it is barely registered, a bullet feels like a feather, a rocket feels like a flick. Oh Rao when I flared and you hugged me I could have cried, you felt firm in my arms, I could feel the pressure if I had known Lena then I would…….”

“Ok, I get it I don't need to hear about you and Lena in that way ok, that is not what I need in my head right now Kara have a heart will you”

Alex knew most of what Kara had already said, she was well versed in the troubles her sister had and she was glad that she was there to hug her when she could truly feel it, she didn't like the idea of the kryptonite room they had at the DEO but every time it meant that she could hug her sister and she knew that she would feel it. She didn't want to hear about her fantasies of what could have been if she knew Lena when she was without her powers, that was not on the agenda but she did need to know about what it was like to be on the receiving end and if there was anything that she could do to ensure that Lex didn't get hurt and that she could express how she felt, the last thing she wanted to to bracket this as a romantic date and then not kiss her, god she wanted to kiss her so badly. She didn't want to think about Lena touching her either, but she needed to know. Her heart was beating so fast now, and even deep breaths were not helping. She ran her hand over the back of her neck and pinched the tense muscles.

“When you are with Lena, and she stays over um, do you feel things? I mean do you feel things the same as if I hug you, it's just soft like when she touches you, is it the same just soft or…”

Kara choked on her drink and started to cough, that was not something that she wanted to compare, Alex’s hugs with sex with Lena, was Alex trying to make this awkward enough that they both die. Rao how does she even answer that, how does she explain that there is a difference with some of her body, that some skin is a little more sensitive. More than that is it possible for a martian to wipe a thought if they can not read your mind, the last thing she wanted to have pop into her head when she was with Lena was Alex, that would be a mood killer.

“Um ok…. Um firstly a hug is different with everyone, um it physically feels the same, the soft pressure, but the different feelings towards people make the hug feel different….”

She glanced over to Alex before looking down at her hands it was now or never she guessed, and maybe explaining this would mean that Alex would feel better, that maybe she would be able to get over this hurdle and then talk to Lex, rao she wished that she had spoken to Lex about this in a different way, not just so getting to know you, where was her scientific mind? When she would question Kara it was like being interrogated, but not. Lex where an interrogation may have been helpful she is all full of curiosity about the possibilities not the practicalities and here she is about to have the most intimate conversation ever with her sister.

“When I am more intimate, I thought that um, I needed someone like me, Mon was able to touch me and I could feel it but it was painful and unpleasant. I mean I heal up quick and all but that was too much pressure and too much strength. Um when Lena touches me, um, it's soft, but I can feel it more, um, like the difference between the scar and the skin, there are parts of me that are like skin, whereas the rest is like the scar. Does that um, do it make sense?”

Alex looked up she could see the redness on Karas cheeks and her neck she could only imagine that her heart was beating as fast as hers with this, she understood though, Alex had several scars and the sensation there was muted, and her normal skin was not, then more sensitive parts were even less muted.

“Right so you have places that are compatible with lighter touch and that works, so there may be places that Lex could be touched lighter?”

“Rao I um, I don't know if it will be exactly the same, it may be that the more sensitive the harder the touch, that is um, that is something that you are going to need to ask her at some point, um, the point that I was um making is that when the more sensitive skin is touched, other places seem to light up too, I can feel more, and um as for, um kissing, well the light brushes kinda tickle and tingle and the longer the kiss the more I feel as the um, the skin on me seems to um…. Well when I start to get excited the skin reacts differently but that is the same I think right um, that's what Lena says and um, that when she is excited that things are more intense, that's why people um, they um, do the groundwork right, they don't just go straight to the main course, right Rao this is um…….I think that there is a possibility that Lex will have something similar only different? Like the harder touch could make the softer touch more bearable, but the kiss yes Rao, let's get back to that, That is much less disturbing, when I am kissed it is more the longer and makes other things nice, now with Lex we um don't know how this is um, going to play out, um kiss her firm but not hard, let her push in if she needs more. And for Rao sake, talk to her about everything else, Lena says that she is Quite used to talking about it.”

Alex felt like her brain was going to ooze out of her ears, the information was helpful to a point and the recommendation was helpful, it gave her a lot to think about and maybe there was some questions that she could ask Lex but she would need to work up to that after all that was much more personal, she chuckled to herself for thinking that, it was personal to Alex not to Lex it was just her, she had not hide anything from Alex she would probably give her a complete breakdown if she asked. She nudged Kara’s shoulder, and whispered thanks you can run off now I know you want to, she could feel the nervous energy vibrating off her, she was barely finished when she felt the side hug and the air whipping out of the room. Alex knew the feeling she wanted the world to swallow her for most of that. She guessed she could research but that seemed to be a little like going behind Lex’s back, she should just talk to her about it, hell maybe Lex wouldn't want the sexual part of a relationship, there had been no conquests in the time that Lex had been on this earth, maybe she was like Sheldon, it would only be once a year. She bit her lip, wondering if she would have the same resolve of Amy if Lex was half as good as he had been. That sparked a whole different set of thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tune in tomorrow for the up"date"
> 
> sorry to keep you all waiting but it is finally time.


	55. Dating is easy?

Lex’s lab (National City) 06-06-2020 Earth Prime 18:30………

Lex had researched the restaurant and the staff it seemed like a nice place, the staff turnover was low, they had good reviews, it was a small almost exclusive location, there was a general feeling of formal dining experience with a familial feel. The dress code was somewhere between Luthor dinners and board room, she had thought about that, the dressing for dinner part of the date was fairly easy, after all once she understood the requirement she was able to pair things that would work. She knew to forgo the formal dress and selected a line skirt and stockings with sensible four inch heels, a silk blouse in her trademark red with a cowl neck line and three quarter length sleeves, she went for soft autumn colours in her makeup and her trademark red lips. She smiled as she put it on looking at herself, it was the one thing that Lena had adopted from her general look. She looked at her watch. It was nearly six thirty, there were twenty seconds remaining. She walked towards the door closing down the lab with a press of her hand.

Alex was stood flowers in hand in the elevator doors closed but not moving, she watched as her watched ticked to twelve seconds and pressed the button to ascend, she had timed the elevator and the doors opening so that she would be able to step into the Lab as the clock ticked over to exactly six thirty, she had noted that Lex would pause for a second or two before knocking on a door to ensure that she was exactly on time, she thought that Lex would appreciate the meticulous planning, to show her that she understood the need in Lex, but also that she was important enough for Alex to go to this trouble, that Alex felt that she was important to her. She watched as the clock ticked and smiled pressing the button to ascend, the elevator moved and she stood her anxiety taking root in her stomach, she looked at herself in the shiny elevator wall. A simple and classic outfit, she was wearing plain black slacks and a single sleeveless black blouse with a scoop neck showing her shoulder on the sleeveless side, she wondered if the lack of symmetry would throw Lex but Kara assured her that she looked beautiful. The clothes showed her sleek frame and sensual curves her hair curled under creating the half bob look.

The clock ticked over to six thirty and the doors opened to reveal Alex holding a bunch of flowers, Lex had been given flowers before, people buying expensive bouquets trying to endear themselves to her maybe hoping for a second meeting but they were all over reaching. They were professionally made and without any meaning, however this bunch in Alex’s hand were not professional in the same way, the grouping of flowers would not have been chosen, not in any standard bouquet. She smiled at Alex as she excited the elevator and handed over the flowers pressing a firm kiss to Lex’s cheek. Lex took the flowers and looked at them a little more closely. Amaryllis - incredible beauty and a person you value beyond that beauty, Daffodil (narcissus) - new beginnings rebirth and good fortune, Camella red - you're a flame in my heart, Camellia Pink - longing for you, Fern - sincerity. She wondered for a moment and then looked at the somewhat nervous face of Alex who looked almost shyly at her. She placed them in the waiting vase that was on the table by the couch and turned back to Alex taking in her appearance.

“Alex, the flowers are very aptly picked and the sentiment is alluring to say the least. You look exquisite, every bit my inconsistent variable in physical form, shall we?”

Alex swallowed hard. She had not thought about the contrast in her look one side was sleeveless and her shaved hair exposed the long curve of her neck, the other covered and the soft red bob cut into her cheek, she smiled as a small blush covered her cheeks. She couldn't believe that Lex complimented her so freely and so effortlessly, the comment on the flowers had made her smile, the top of the stockings highlighted by the bend to place the flowers in the vase had caused her mouth to suddenly dry and her ability to swallow was marred by the lump in her throat. She offered Lex her elbow and smiled brightly. She wanted to complement Lex, something about her look that was specific and personal.

“You look enchanting as always, your makeup is softer, It um, I can see you, and you are beautiful”

Lex’s breath hitched for a moment and then she schooled her features into a smile before taking the offered hand, for the moment that Alex said that she didn't see her as a monster, Lex hoped that Alex would eventually see her as she was, that she was not who the Luthors forced her to be, she was not what the world expected her to be, to just be seen as Lex with all her flaws and quirks and just accept her, that was a compliment that she had not realised that she needed to hear but it was perfectly times and made her heart stutter, she spared a passing thought to if there was a medical reason for the premature ventricular contraction but as there was only one and it coincided with Alex’s words and soft smile she couldn't deny that the correlation was irrefutable, Alex danvers just had a very real and profound effect on her physical being. They stepped into the elevator and proceeded down to the waiting car. Alex opened the door and offered her hand as Lex slipped in. The chivalry continued as she opened the door and helped her out, opened the door to the restaurant and pulled her chair before sitting her at the table.

“This place is picturesque and the table choice is perfect Alex thank you, you have put much more effort into this effortless appearing date than you are taking credit for”

Lex took in the positioning, there was a clear view of each door, the table was set in the darker corner with more privacy, there was no one else seated near, there was no view of her from the outside, there was nothing to her back but a wall, she could easily exit through the two options without having to maneuver particularly difficult layouts. She smiled at the decantre on the table and realised that Alex had red wine prepared too, she knew that this place served steak and that was why Alex picked it, she wondered what the wine would be considering that Alex had told her that she had no knowledge. Lex noted the waiter placing a small sample in her glass and handing it to her with a small smile. She tested the wine and her eyes opened a little wider and her brow lifted.

“2008 château Margaux, It is the one you prefer right? I wanted things to be familiar, and routine without repeating the previous dinner we shared, I um, I wanted things to start right but not be uncomfortable for you I, I hope that it is alright”

Alex’s heart was beating fast it was the right bottle she was almost sure of it, she thought about checking with Lena but she didn't want to doubt herself, not with this, not with all the effort that she had gone to to ensure this was as close to Lex’s normal routine with none of the previous memories attached, she wanted her calm and happy, having things almost the same as she would every other friday, without the memories associated with that night, she wanted the fresh start, the new beginning the real first date. She was starting to think that she should have asked when Lex reached across the table and took her wrist, stroking her thumb over the inside calming her nerves, she looked up and saw the smile on Lex’s face and the nod, the Waiter had filled the two glasses and left the menus on the table retreating and giving them space.

“Alex, everything is more than adequate, you have thought of everything, as much as I understand the first time we ate together holds less than favorable memories, there have been many others forged since then, it wasn't your fault. This, everything you have done, it is much more than I had expected from anyone, you have really paid attention, you really do see me”

“You are very hard not to pay attention to Lex, you are amazing, the way you think the things you come up with, you have the ability to see things others don't, and you make them into something, you may not have intent behind your dazzling mind, but that doesn't make it any less beautiful and amazing, you are insightful and see things in magical ways, the way you talk about music, has a level of insight that is missed, you may not see it yourself but the way you describe things is so emotive and charming, and you care, so much, the things you have done to help me the team, and I have no words for what you are trying to achieve in the lab”

Lex was used to people complimenting her looks, using her for her mind, she didn't think that she had ever been complimented quite like that, she tilted her head and looked at Alex, she wasn't trying to attribute good or bad, or intent of any description she was appreciating her for the way she saw things, she wasn't here despite the quirks and oddities of Lex and her thoughts, her way of being, she was here because of them, because Lex was different. She didn't feel like it was interesting in making her different, fixing her, she didn't note any expectation that Lex could be different, she was embracing it and planning for it. Alex Danvers was a wonder, not just an inconsistent variable, but a completely unique individual. She picked up the menu, the look Alex was giving her was making her body react quite strangely and it just felt intense in a way that she wasn't sure that was unpleasant, she needed a moment to assess it she saw that it was indeed possible to get her normal order and smiled. Looking to Alex who had already placed the menu down and called over the waiter.

“I will take the medium t bone, with sweet potato wedges, and a side salad, thank you”

“Can I get the steak in peppercorn sauce, with the fries, garlic mushrooms and grilled tomatoes please”

The waiter nodded and took the menus leaving them together once again. The conversation flowed easily, they talked about music, and work, some less difficult aspects of their child hood’s, they talked about Alex’s friends, their sisters, some of Lex’s lesser known experiments and inventions, the food came and went the deserts too, they talked for hours until the restaurant was empty and they were simply sat with glasses of scotch talking, Alex had taken her hand at some point after dessert and she had not let it go since. They found an easy groove which was comfortable, and the occasional lull in conversation was comfortable and calming. The waiter had not been intrusive, had given them space and time, but it was clearly time for them to go, Alex true to her word had paid for the meal, Lex had felt that it was a gesture that she needed to let Alex do, and even though the meal and the wine would have been expensive she wanted Alex to feel equal, that's how Lex saw her, they made each other better. Alex rounded the table and took Lex’s seat so that she could stand, offering her arm again to escort her out of the building.

“I thought that we could walk, you don't live far from here and I am not ready for the night to be over just yet, if that is not ok the car is outside, I wanted to give you the option.”

“I think that a walk could be nice, the City is different at night, the sounds are less abrasive, the light less bright, and there is that scent of freshness that comes in at dusk that pushes away the smell of traffic and unwashed masses, I am also finding that I have no particular inclination to have the evening come to an end.”

Alex waved off the driver and took Lex’s hand. She made sure to press their hands together firmly and avoided any casual brushing. Her heart was beating strong in her chest, feeling that the night had been perfect, that the only way to end this night would be with a kiss, she would have wanted it to be tender and soft but doesn't want to hurt Lex, but she didn't want to leave without finally knowing what kissing Lex was like. She had thought about it so many times through the meal, the small smiles she had elicited from the red lips, the brief laughs that almost appeared unexpected to Lex. She was nervous about the kiss but they had a stroll through the park to calm her nerves, and she hoped that it was enough, because the building excitement and anticipation was starting to make her think about inappropriate things right now. She listened to Lex’s assessment of the city at night and a small smile graced her face.

“I enjoy the city late at night and Early in the morning the best, I grew up in a small town and there were not as many people, or as much noise. When it is late like this or really early, the city seems calmer, more at peace with itself, it feels more open some how, like you can really see the beauty of the architecture, the way the open spaces soften the edges of the city scape, I like to run along the path to the docks early when the dew can still be smelt and the only people out are taking their time there's no rush.”

“I like that too, there is so much going on in my head all the time that it is constant noise, there are very few things that can actually calm my mind and with that constant, the additional noise of the city and the busy people pushing and shoving, it escalates things, you know, like there is a direct correlation the louder the city the louder my mind until it all comes crashing down, on days where I am over sensitive it is just painful to be in the middle of the city. I am grateful for the way you can calm my mind, as much as you have been my inconsistent variable, you have also managed to become something more than that, you have an ability to sooth the frayed and exposed nerves that constantly fire and cause distress.”

Alex’ heart was racing as she rounded the corner to Lex’s building, she couldn't believe what Lex had just said, that was possibly the most openly loving thing she had ever heard, yes hearing I love you is always nice, being told your beautiful is lovely, but the rawness of the explanation of what it is like to be Lex, followed by the expression of how Alex affects that in such a profound and amazing way, she could feel the way her heart was swelling how her feelings for Lex seemed to be growing, she didn't think that it was possible, once you loved someone that was it, but not with Lex. Every new insight, every moment of this connection that deepened, so did the love she felt for her. They stopped and Alex knew it was now or never, she couldn't just let Lex say a polite good night, be dismissed, in her own charming way. She stopped and looked into Lex’s eyes, dropping her hand and taking her face with purpose, she pushed forward to kiss Lex, it was too fast a move to force a kiss, their teeth had clashed and Lex had pulled back and touched her own lips with a small wince. Alex could feel her heart squeeze, her stomach flipped and her cheeks burned, she wanted just to sink into the earth. She looked away from Lex and down to the floor.

“Alex, I think that you may have been a little exuberant with that first attempt, but that doesn't mean we can't evaluate and try again, some of the best scientific breakthroughs come from a initial failed experiment”

Lex had not expected that, the sudden surge forward, kisses had always been something that she could enjoy much like other people, there was a general sensitivity to her skin, nearly all touch had always hurt, but over the years drinking, eating applying make up the over sensitivity had subsided her lips were so much more like other peoples, there was no way for Alex to know that through all their conversations they had never been explicit about that, it was a conversation that would need to take place, as would further discussions about other kinds of touch if this was going to continue, Lex couldn't believe that she was thinking about this, but at the same time she couldn't imagine a time that she would want to push Alex away, and although she was terrible at relationships, and did not understand human interaction, she wanted to try, wanted to be better for Alex. There were things that they would struggle with but she needed to address the first pitfall, and deal with the iron taste in her mouth, Alex had been forceful and purposeful, that was her trying to do what she thought that Lex needed and she loved her more for it. It was surprising how now she had admitted how she felt how easy it was to think in those terms. She placed her hand onto Alex’s face and turned her to look at her.

“The pressure on my face was perfect Alex, the kiss was wanted, but you need to know this one thing. My lips are constantly being touched, by each other, by cups and food, they have developed resilience, and you don't need to worry when kissing me, now, I believe that is something that we should try again, just kiss me back, because I was anticipating to this all night”

Lex moved forward into Alex’s space and softly connected their lips, she kissed to the top, and to the bottom of her lips, before tilting her head a little, she took Alex’s hand and placed it on her hip, then the other as she thread her arms around her, her hand into her hair and scratching the scalp a little harder than Alex was probably used to but not unpleasant or painful she hoped. Alex had pulled her flush and held her firmly and started to kiss her back. Lex’s eyes fluttered closed as Alex’s lips moved with hers, both soft and pliable, molding into each other and fitting together so perfectly. Lex slipped her tongue to her lower lip and licked over her bottom lip, there was a moment of hesitation before Alex opened her lips slightly and allowed Lex to enter, she stroked her tongue and softly sucked her tongue into her mouth. They had her tongue ripple lightly massaging Alex’s tongue as their lips continued to dance together, Lex controlling the kiss, there was a soft moan from Alex before she moved Lex to the wall and pressed into her intensifying the kiss for her.

Alex had taken a moment to register the kisses, soft to the lips then to the top and bottom with a small suck, and then she felt Lex moving her hands and started scratching her scalp, it felt divine the softness of the kiss with the slightly harder scratch to her scalp, it caused Alex’s mind to finally pull free form the embarrassed haze and frozen posture, she pulled them flush together and held her firmly. She hoped that the way that she was holding her was tight enough that she was not hiring her the answer came a moment later as she asked for permission to enter her mouth. She had no idea what Lex was doing with her tongue, but the way it rippled against hers was magical, she could feel that her body was reacting to it, thoughts of that movement in other places danced in her mind. She turned them and placed Lex into the wall and took more control, turning her head to the other side, nipping at her lip and stroking her tongue along Lex’s. She gave it a suck and moved with her, the kiss continued to deepen, and become more heated, she pressed into Lex a little further as she whimpered. She needed to stop before she got too carried away, she didn't want just one night. She pulled back and looked at her, panting as she spoke.

“Well fuck…. that….that was better than…… holy shit, do all kisses, um that felt, um, different to normal, it was, just wow, I am sorry I messed up the first one, but that was just perfect.”

“Alex….. exhilarating”

Alex couldn't help but smile, she may have been a rambling idiot but that was as close to speechless as she had ever seen Lex, her breathing laboured as much as Alex’s, she felt a strange sense of pride, knowing that the genius’s mind was probably extremely quieted in this moment.


	56. Week of firsts part 1

Lex’s Apartment (National City) 07-06-2020 Earth Prime 06:30………

*the first request for a second date

Lex woke as she always did, looking at the clock next to her on the bedside table, the second hand ticking around exactly thirty five seconds before the alarm was due to ring, she wondered why she even bothered after all she woke at the same time regardless of when she went to bed. She turned off the alarm as it rang, slipping herself out of the sheets and headed to the bathroom, fifteen minutes shower, teeth, makeup and dressed, she had everything down to an art form, her clothes would have been picked the night before and everything laid out in order as she moved through her routine. The only difference today was the small pause as she brushed over her own lips as she thought for a moment about the kiss that she had received the night before.

Saturdays were the only unscheduled days, although that wasn't exactly right, she had breakfast as always and picked up a lunch, she would go for her normal meal at seven, but the day itself did not have form other than that. Over her life there had been many routines, after school activities, things that a person of her standing should be able to do, a well rounded socially acceptable person, with additionals that she had committed to in an effort to have some kind of relationship with her father that never worked. Over the years routines had changed, instead of fencing, archery, shooting, Karate and other martial arts, she had a set routine for exercise to maintain her body, carefully structured by a personal trainer. Instead of chess, music and reading the classic to enhance her mind, she was now working in science. Horse riding, advanced driving, ballroom dancing, ice skating and painting, were replaced with obligatory events, galas and retreats with the board, the whole point of taking the lessons. So on Saturday she would do something from her old routines.

Lena had always said that she did these things because she enjoyed them, that she missed having fun, sometimes she would join with her before the incident with superman of course, but Lex didn't look at it that way. These things had a place in her mind in her body memory, there were pathways and an expectation to manage them, it wasn't about enjoyment it was about maintaining skill. Each activity had at one point been part of her life fundamentally and she had pathways in her mind that were used to specific stimulus, she would do one of these things on a saturday. She did note that some of the things had not made it into her adult life, she put them down as unnecessary for the current state of her life. She never associated the activities with enjoyment, just the fulfilling of a missing pattern, but she couldn't deny that there was something about returning to old things that settled her. She thought about Alex and if she might like to come with her on a saturday, they could do things that were different, she thought Alex may like the driving, shooting, the martial arts, they had talked alot about music but she wasn't sure that she played any instruments, although it would be possible to attend something.

She had arrived at the Cafe and thought about her morning, she was nearly ten minutes late, that was not something in any way regular, and she realised that the time was spent thinking about Alex, the kiss, the date, and the possibilities of other activities they could do on a saturday. She took her normal booth and within no time her food was with her, and the lunch too. She smiled at the waitress and thanked her. She was clearly helping her make time up, she like everyone else was aware that Lex would leave at seven thirty, her normal breakfast felt a little rushed. She ate as she thought, for the first time following a date she wanted the person to contact her again, she wanted to see her again, not just in work, she wondered what people do in this situation so she asked suri. It wasn't the most advanced system but it gave her places to start.

There were a number of things recommended to text, she looked at them and bit her lip, they were nothing that she would say, they were simple, “I had fun, text me when you get home” clearly too late. ““I had a really nice time with you last night. We should do it again sometime.” this was too ambiguous, if Alex said yes or me too, there would be too many possibilities she couldn't cope with it. Then she saw something else, a website for dating etiquette. That was at least familiar, etiquette rules for society, when she said what she was supposed to do, she realised that she couldn't do it via text, she didn't allow personal information to be transmitted electronically like that. She finished breakfast and headed out to the car making one stop before her day.

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 07-06-2020 Earth Prime 14:30………

Alex had been in her apartment all morning, she kept herself busy and cleaned, it wasn't that it was dirty or disordered but she needed something to do. She wanted to text Lex, to call her, she couldn't stop thinking about the date, the kiss, she wondered if Lex had enjoyed it, would there be another, she said she would try, but after they had the first one, would she still want another? She knew that it wasn't the right thing to do to message her, to pester her, Lex wouldn't like that, she would be interrupting something although she had no idea what. Through all their talks Lex never mentioned her routine for Saturday, she knew every other day why Saturday never came up. She had woken early and thought about going to the cafe, but she didn't want to seem desperate, but she did want to see Lex. she had made it all the way to half past two, she had just an hour and a half before going to the super base, she could do this. Then tomorrow she could message and it wouldn't be too much.

With that there was a knock at the door and Alex looked up a little confused, she wasn't expecting anyone to be visiting. She opened the door to a delivery boy, he was maybe sixteen, oversized jeans and a flannel shirt and a backward cap. He looked at his clipboard and asked if she was Alex Danvers, she confirmed and he turned picking up a massive bouquet of flowers and some expensive looking chocolates. Handing them over to Alex he nodded and left. Alex walked back in and closed the door. There was a selection of pink and peach roses, and the chocolates were belgian. There was a card and Alex took it tentatively and opened it up, she couldn't refrain her heart that was beating faster as she opened it. With each word her heart accelerated until it was beating so hard that she was sure she was going to have a heart attack.

“Alex, thank you for the date, you thought of everything and made me so comfortable, I have been thinking about you all morning, it seems that my cerebral patterns are becoming more and more accustomed to your increased presence. You are an exceptional person and I enjoyed our walk getting an insight into your thoughts. We spoke about our shared admiration for cars and was wondering if you might like to take a drive in one of my classics. I am free next saturday and if you are amenable I would like to go on a second date with you”

Alex’s heart had continued to pound in her chest and she couldn't believe that Lex had done this, she had been so worried about pushing her and messaging her that she had not, then there were flowers and chocolates, she should have text, maybe Lex would have been open to it, maybe she had made Lex think that she didn't have such a good time. But then there was also a request for a second date. There was a gust of wind and she was suddenly being held by Kara.

“Oh my Rao, Alex what is it? What's wrong, is there an emergency?”

“No, it's just, Lex sent me flowers Kara, I was just nervous and excited and so happy, I need to look up what they mean, but she, Kara she asked me on a date next week.”

Kara smiled at her sister and gave her another hug looking at the flowers and then she pulled back and looked into Alex’s eyes.

“Well anyone would be stupid to not want a second date with you, your amazing and Lex well she is a genius, and just so you know Pink is for admiration, gratitude and appreciation, while the peach ones, they are modesty and dimurness, but some times, also used to say that someone is missing you, I would say that the date must have been good. Tell me about it tomorrow ok, I have to get back Lena is waiting”

Lena’s penthouse (National City) 08-06-2020 Earth Prime 10:30………

*the fist laugh

Alex arrived at the penthouse to find Lex stood outside, she was looking at her watch and then knocked, she smiled realising that Lex was waiting for the time to hit. It was strangely endearing to see that Lex timed things so that she would not surprise others, although it was not something that would be a problem a minute or two it was important to Lex, and Alex thought it was sweet. The fact that the door opened almost the second that she knocked meant that Lena also knew that Lex would have been waiting too. She stepped closer and smiled, as Lex turned and smiled back, the door fully open and beckoning the two women in. Lena hugged both of them, Lexi first then Alex.

“Welcome, Kara is just getting ready, she won't be a moment. Are you ready for pancakes? I think I have perfected the triple with spin”

Lex looked at her and raised her brow before smiling, at her, moving forward to the kitchen, and taking her seat. Alex had walked into the kitchen area and settled close to Lex. she watched her out of the corner of the eye and once she had settled, Lex reached out and placed her hand on Alex’s wrist giving a little squeeze. She heard when Alex’s breath caught and she was about to remove her hand as she felt Alex take her hand and hold it as they had done on Friday. She turned a little to look at Alex and smiled softly before speaking.

“So Lena bean here has been secretly practicing to complete an old challenge, I watch as she flips pancakes and calculates her odds of success. We have the triple flip, which is a standard flip with three rotations of the pancake to cook the other side. There is the single flip with a full rotation, and then there is the triple flip with the complete rotation. Now Lena has never managed to complete the triple with a spin. Given her previous experience and failures, I would say you have a very good chance at seeing my sister wearing a pancake very soon”

Alex looked at her and smiled, she knew that it was a little bit of a love sick look, she was still reeling from the proposal of the second date, she had of coursed text back using the same formula or similar, she complimented her and said that she was free that she would like the opportunity, and then in true danvers fashion, thanked her for the flowers, told her she was thinking about her too, and that she had a great time the night before. Then there were a number of kisses which she hesitated to add, but eventually did. She turned towards Lena and waited rubbing her thumb over Lex’s as she did. Kara came in then and spotted the hand holding. Throwing a knowing look Alex’s way before hugging her.

“Oh is Lena about to start? She is getting good, do you want to wait to see before we go?”

Alex felt the small squeeze to her hand, could it be that Lex didn't want her to leave? This was her and Lena’s time after all, she nodded to Kara who took a seat next to Alex and Lena looked back around to see all three women watching her intently. She suddenly felt a little nervous and wanted to start with something a little more simple before she tried the triple. The pancake was ready, it was time to flip.

“Triple flip”

Lex watched as the flip happened and smiled telling her that it was a 97% flip as the pancake spun and as it landed there was a small amount of the pancake folded on one side and Lex grinned. Lena started again and then grinned, and said triple again sticking her tongue out at Lexi. this time it was 100% stated by Lex the moment there was a contraction of her wrist. Lena smiled brightly. She raised her brow as Alex and Kara cheered a little, and Lex nodded with a very proud smile on her face.

“Single with spin”

Lex watched and then calculated as the pancake started to move and Lena started to spin, Lex declared floor before her apron catching on the cupboard, Lena cursed as she got pulled back and didn't make it around, there was a small flash and Kara caught it in a different pan. Lena detangled herself as she took off the offending article and grinned, looking at Kara heating the other side of the pancake.

“What it's chocolate chip?”

There was a small snigger from Alex and Kara placed the pancake on the side and returned to Alex, she took a little look at Lex who didn't seem to be perturbed by the save and Lena announced she would try again this time Lex said that it was a perfect flip and it was. She did a second to prove that it wasn't a fluke, Lex was watching closely, she could see that Lena was delaying, although she wasn't sure if it was nerves or if she was just enjoying the additional time with everyone. She was ready again and looked at the three of them.

“Triple with spin”

Lex watched and a moment later was stool, her smile wide, she didn't declare it she just watched as the spins started the trajectory was perfect the dlip had been flat no spin ot snach and the pancake was flying up straight and perfect. Then the speed of the spin created was going to create a perfect three spin, but Lena would need to raise the pan just 1.24 inches, the spin speed was perfect and she was spinning perfectly on the spot, on the ball of her right foot, her head span quick to keep the visual on the pancake and she raised her hand a little and tilted the pan slightly as the pancake landed perfectly. Lena looked to Lexi who was smiling wide, she cheered.

“Well done Lena bean you have mastered the laws of physics, time for the taste test?”

Lena laughed and plated up some pancakes handing them over to Lexi and kissing her cheek. She couldn't help the way she was feeling it was stupid she knew it but it was the look of pride Lexi had on her face that made her heart well and beat a little faster.

“Well I guess that we should get going well done Lena impressive flipping”

As she said that there was a moment where Kara had tried to snag a pancake for herself over balancing and tipping off the stool her hand hit the plate sending the pancake she was about to steal into the air, Lex looked out of the side of her eye and started laughing, with no interruption she said 96.43% face. Continuing to laugh, everyone was so startled by the laughing that Kara forgot to right herself and landed on the floor followed by the pancake hitting her square in the face that caused everyone to join Lex. Lena looked at Alex and Kara before looking back at a still laughing Lex. Lena loved the sound and it was fast becoming something that Alex needed to hear more. Kara’s blush was making Alex laugh harder. Lex had continued to laugh seemingly unable to stop, after a few minutes with tears running down her face, consistently resparked by the others laughing until she finally managed to catch her breath.

“Considering the laws of physics don't actually apply to you Kara, I thought you would have saved yourself, or at least the pancake”

There was another round of laughing although this time, Lex just looked at them a little confused she had not meant to tell a joke? Had she? Alex stood ready to leave and smiled softly leaning in to give Lex a small chased kiss, one which Lex returned eagerly.

Lex’s lab (National City) 09-06-2020 Earth Prime 12:30………

*the first make out session

There had been a productive morning with a number of little projects finished, they had managed a number of dispersal options for the kryptonite, they stopped for lunch and had moved to the couch in the other room and sat down together, it was at this point that they started talking, the transition seemed to be fairly easy, it was strange both of them being completely professional in the lab, there were a few touches but the moment they were no longer in the working lab things changed. Lex’s hand seemed to seek out that of Alex’s, conversation resumed about things that they had not talked about, and soon the food was consumed and they were just sitting holding hands looking at each other. There was a moment that Alex felt like the whole atmosphere in the Lab changed, it became charged and Alex could feel the same excitement from Friday night when they arrived at Lex’s penthouse.

Alex moved a little and leaned into Lex, her lips heading towards the other like there was a pull, she wanted to kiss her to feel those lips against her own again. Lex appeared to understand the movement and desire and moved towards her too. Once again Lex was showing Alex just what is possible with her abilities. She couldn't understand how she was able to pulsate her tongue, or roll it then she sucked in her tongue and Alex seemed to lose her mind moving closer Lex seemed to happily lay back onto the couch and Alex moved over her body applying pressure onto Lex, she was not sure if it was enough, a silent question answered as Lex seemed to reach up and pull her down harder. The kiss continued and Alex gripped her hip and tread her knee between Lex’s thighs. The next thing Alex knows Lex is kissing down her neck and nipping and sucking on her pulse point. Alex moaned lightly and her hand moved from her hip applying pressure up over Lex’s ribs which caused Lex to moan lightly. Alex thought that she would happily listen to that soft moan forever.

Lex moved back to kiss her again this time her hands were pulling at her back slipping under her shirt and scratching her back, Alex moaned again as shte nails caused pressure just the right side of pain and Lex rolled her hips into Alex's thigh. Alex pushed her thigh in harder to increase the pressure as Lex liften her knee to connect with Alex. they rolled their hips in time with each other and the Kisses became sloppy, Alex nipped across the jaw and the neck of the other, harder than she would normally but not enough to break the skin. Lex could feel herself getting excited, the bites were perfect although to much more stimulation and she would have to tell Alex to ease off. She moaned and bucked as she bit into her neck and leaned her head back allowing Alex extra room. Alex was intoxicating and she wanted to continue, but that was not possible right now. She placed her hands on Alex's face and kissed her softly.

“As much as this is a surprising and very much welcome alteration to the work day, I think we should stop, I don't want you like this, this isn't a quick fix, you are not an anonymous person Alex, you're my inconsistent variable and I want to do this right.”

“You're killing me Luthor.”

Alex couldn't help but feel amazed that out of the two of them, Lex was the one craving time and patience. Alex felt like a horney teenager, she wanted to see what else Lex could do with that tongue, wanted to elicit more moans from her lips, she was ready to throw out years of tempered approaches to relationships and just go for it, but Lex wanted more. God she loved her.

“Not yet Danvers but you will know when I am”


	57. Week of firsts part 2

Lena’s apartment (National City) 10-06-2020 Earth Prime 07:00………

*the first time Kara suggests working with Lex

Kara and Lena had been developing a routine, they were easily in their stride and found it more comfortable than they had ever been before, being close as best friends and then destroying that had given way to something more, something so much deeper. The swapping of the items for preparation Lena was planning to head out to meet Lex for breakfast but she still had coffee with Kara. It was after they were both sat at the breakfast bar that Kara looked up at Lena with a soft smile worrying her lip a little before she spoke.

“Lena, do you think that Lex would be willing to create a prototype of her suggestion, you um, you know the micro infusion to agarose gel, I know its Kryptonite but if she can do it safely it could really help, I um, I don't want to see another planet destroy itself and well safe sustainable power will make such a difference”

Lena Looked at Kara she smiled and took her hand looking into her eyes, Kara seemed to be a little nervous which was to be expected with the kryptonite but she really seemed open to the Idea of working with Lexi.

“Are you sure Kara? I mean it would mean that we would have Kryptonite in all the cells, it could be dangerous”

“I mean it seems Less damaging to me than the others by what Lex said, she was more worried it would supercharge me, which she didn't seem to like the idea of, but if she was able to make it safe, and was happy to help I think it would be worth it, she is brilliant and the idea is genius”

Lena felt her heart swell with love, this was Kara’s way of helping the earth but also accepting Lex into their lives she could see how important a step that was, she had been gradually moving closer to accepting Lex, the trip to the lab that Lena though could be something that removed all the progress in one swoop seemed to solidify Kara’s thoughts about Lex in a more positive way. It wasn't something that Lena was expecting and she was not only surprised but so thankful that this change was occurring with Kara. she wondered what it was that had caused this, she had not really spoken about it with Kara, she had just noticed the change, she always looked worried when she couldn't hear Alex or when she spoke about Lex but there was a change, she had stilled.

“What changed? It is not that I am not grateful that you seem to be more open to Lexi, she is important to me, but something happened in the lab and I was wondering what it was.”

Kara looked at her and she could see and hear the difference in her, her heart was beating differently and her eyes were soft and shining, Kara smiled and took her hand rubbing her thumb over the back of her hand as she looked at their conjoined hands. She brought them up to her mouth to kiss Lena’s hand before looking back into the mesmerising eyes that she loved so much. She knew that Lena was asking, she understood that there was a shift in her in the lab, that there was something in that space that finally cleared the food in her mind, and they had not spoken about it. She nodded slightly as she chose her words.

“I have visited lots of earths, and seen so many alternative timelines, I have both the information before the crisis and after in my mind. Both versions of Lex have things in common, and the fight with Kal is one of them, the male version did more damage to Metropolis and you, but this version, your Lex did damage too. Kal told me about their relationship, about the fight, about the devastation and the attempt to kill him. The information about Lex, yours and Alex’s input on what she is like, I, I trust you and Alex, but I couldn't trust her. When we were in the lab, she stopped me moving, and it hurt her. I saw her wince, then when she showed how easily that she could have killed me I realised something. It wasn't that it wasn't scary, it was, knowing that Lex can not only take away my power but also can kill me with a flick of her hand is scary for me. She, she is or was unstable and your treatments are really helping, but the thought she could just kill me or Kal so easily was suddenly very obvious……”

“She isn't going to hurt you Kara, I promise”

Kara smiled and kissed her placing her hand on Lena’s face as she looked at her as sincerely as she could.

“I know that, I do, the thing is, when I realised just how easy she could have done it, how easily she could have just let me walk in that room, how easy she could turn that Lazor on me at any time, it made something abundantly clear. If she had been trying to kill Kal, if that was her aim like he always claimed it was, he would be dead, I have no doubt about it, which means she wasn't trying to hurt him, and she was retaliating, he did used his vision to blind her, he did use a sonic clap, he did all the things that she said, and he was her best friend, I know not to do that to her, how much it hurts when things over stimulate me, Kal had the same but he did it anyway, she was not out to get him, and I know that she isn't a treat now, seeing just how easy she could kill me showed me she wasn't trying to.”

Lena smiled, her whole world seemed a little brighter, Kara and Lex could find a flow, a relationship, something more than fear and suspicion, she just hoped that Lex would eventually be able to see Kara the same. A few stray happy tears spilled and she kissed Kara knowing she needed to leave. She whispered thank you as she kissed her again and then said she would think about it before Leaving for breakfast.

LCorp Lab (National City) 11-06-2020 Earth Prime 17:30………

*the first time Lena asks for help

Lena had been thinking about the conversation with Kara since the morning before, she didn't feel comfortable when she left for breakfast with her sister, but she had thought about it a lot and she decided that between herself, Kara and Lexi they could really make a difference. It had initially shocked her when Kara mentioned it but, the way that she had been so open to the idea calmed her. She couldn't deny that the thought of reaching out and asking for help was still something that was a forign concept to her. She had always been someone who worked alone, she had taken chances and risks that Kara had not liked, and as much as she loved her it was hard to change. As for Lexi she looked up to her sister so much, she wanted her to be proud of her and asking for help meant that she wasn't able to do it alone, but she knew that this was just her own pride. She pulled out her phone and dialed.

“Hey Lexi, are you busy?”

“Lena bean I am always busy, as you know. Well I have just finished putting the samples away and i need to continue the cleansing of the lab and then close down for the evening before I head to dinner, but I have time”

“Well yes Lexi I know that your busy, I was hoping that I wasn't interrupting anything important, I wanted to ask you if there you had time to do a little side project, the information that you gave to Kara the other day about the different gell and casing, it would really make a difference to our cells and I was wondering if you would like to help by creating a prototype”

“I don't do anything that isn't important, as you know I wouldn't answer if it was a interruption, as for your project, all you had to do is ask Lena bean, I always have time for you”

Lena’s Penthouse (National City) 12-06-2020 Earth Prime 19:00………

*the first hug

Lex had arrived with Alex for the sisters movie night, Lex was not sure that this was an adequate use for time but she agreed that she would attend this once a month provided that she could have her normal meal delivered, and there had been agreement. She had met her in the lobby which was unexpected, but it was definitely preferable to arriving alone. Alex had kissed her on the way up and she very much enjoyed that, she didn't even notice that they had arrived until Lena had opened the door and spoted them not quite at the door. Lex looked up breaking the kiss and noted the small whine coming from Alex as she did. Stepping closer she hugged her sister and greeted her as she stepped inside. Moving past Lena she saw Kara who was standing there arms down by her side fiddling with the fabric of her shirt. She seemed to be embodying the clear conflict in her mind about what to do, Lex wondered if it was just nerves, or if she was struggling with a conflicting set of stimuli. She tilted her head and looked at her a little. She seemed to be itching to reach out, remembering the way she was so tactile and always hugging people she wondered if that was what she was expecting.

Lena had not expected to see that when she opened the door, she knew that Lexi and Alex had gone out and that Lexi was someone who was physically open to sexual contact, but she was a little surprised that she had missed her by the second knock, clearly Alex was quite the distraction. She smiled and hugged her sister and let her in, a slightly flustered Alex was next and Lena couldn't help but smile at the flushed look, she wasn't sure if it was embarrassment or the kiss itself, Lena decided to give her a pass and pulled her in for a hug of her own as she entered the penthouse. Lena noted that this time when Alex hugged her she had gripped her slightly tighter, she folded around her completely open and seemed to sink into her. Lena smiled softly and squeezed a little tighter before pulling back to see a somewhat shocked look on Alex’s face.

Alex had made sure that she arrived early so that she could see Lex just for a few moments before they were all together the kiss was as always mind blowing, she almost missed the door opening, she wished Lex had as she pulled away the small whine that escaped her lips as she did embarrassed Alex a little but she realised they were being observed. She watched as Lena and Lex hugged and they moved around so that Lex could enter, she was so grateful for Lena’s advice that the feelings that she had been holding seemed to have melted away over the last week. So when Lena pulled her infor a hug she couldn't help but put all that gratitude into the hug and held Lena tightly, she noticed the small sigh from Lena as she squeezed harder before letting go. It was a new start for them. She hoped after all they were going to be spending more time together and she had to admit to herself that she missed Lena, they had been friends at one point. She caught a sight as she pulled back and her face rearranged itself into something between panic, fear, and shock. She raised her hand and watched as Lena turned to see what she was looking at.

Kara watched as Lex hugged Lena and stepped into the room, she wasn't sure if she could hug Lex too, she knew that she didn't like people touching her particularly, especially if they were soft and she knew that she wasn't Lex’s favorite person. The issue was Kara was massively tactile and liked hugs, and Lex was Lena’s sister she was going to be family, and possibly even more with Alex falling for her, she wanted to reach out and hug her but didn't want to upset her, she fiddled with her hem trying to decide what to do. Her arms wanted to reach out and hug her even if it was just briefly, she watched as Lex looked at her and then she tilted her head, almost as if she was trying to work out what Kara was thinking, she inched closer giving Lex to pull away but she didn't, Kara bit her lip and took another step, Lex didn't move, so she moved her hands from her side and reached out. There was a brief moment of what looked like panic but she took Lex in her arms and held tightly. She beamed as she looked up to see Lena and Alex looking shocked as Lex moved her arms to hug her back. It was brief but it was still a hug.

Lex’s lab (National City) 13-06-2020 Earth Prime 18:00………

*the first sex talk

Alex had arrived at six she was early but that was only because she was eager, Lex had asked her to have dinner with her so she had turned up, they had spent a lot of time together this week and Alex couldn't get enough, and then even though tomorrow is their official date, this was extra time and she wasn't going to say no. Lex and her seemed to have a lot of chemistry there was no sex, but they had been getting to the relms of heavy petting. Alex thought if that continued there could be a chance that tomorrow things could change. She needed to talk to Lex about sex. She arrived and Lex was getting changed in the external area as the elevator opened. Alex flushed as she looked over the expanse of skin she was now privy to, Lex was stunning, soft curves, smooth skin, her mouth went dry as she flushed and turned stuttering an apology.

“Oh Lex I um, I am sorry I am early, I can wait down stairs.”

Her question was answered by Lex moving to her and kissing her softly, she told her it wasn't needed and then there was more kissing, they were already back to the heated kissing, and touching each other, Alex felt her knees on the couch and sat Lex straddling her, moaning lightly, it continued until Lex pulled back. She was not sure why she couldn't keep her hands to herself. She had not felt this level of compulsion towards another person in her life, she was almost constantly on the edge of arousal in Alex’s presence, but over a week of teasing was getting too much for her. She was feeling like she needed to fulfill this need soon or she felt that she may actually combust. She pulled back and looked at Alex, she didnt want to have sex with her in the lab, she wanted to do this better, it took every bit of Luthor stubbornness and every bit of her own resolve to pull back and stop.

“I’m sorry, I keep getting carried away Lex, I know that you want to do this right and honestly I am not sure that I can relax enough until we talk about it, I want to, I want you, but I am worried, you need to tell me about what I can and can't do, and well I need to know that I am doing what you need.”

Lex thought about it there was not much time to explain they could talk about it later, but maybe the clinical explanation would be enough to take the anxiety away from Alex, not that her behavior seemed to be anxiety ridden, Alex seemed extremely confident in her ministrations, in fact the way that she touched her already Lex was finding it completely different to anything that came before. Lena had suggested it was because of her emotional attachment, and she couldn't really study it or test the theory. She moved from her lap and sat next to Alex looking up and nodding before trying to explain.

“When people have sex there is a number of things that happen as you know Alex, there is a flood of excitement and adrenalin, along with dopamine, serotonin, norepanephrine and GABA. This combination in regular brains heightens emotions and attention, creates more arousal and uplifts the mood, controls the alertness of the individual and calms the neuronal transmitters. As you know that makes sex feel good, for me, when the neutones are quietened, and the adrenalin changed my blood flow, it stops the sensativity, so instead of being over sensitive and in pain I can feel touch.”

Lex looked at her she wasn't intending to give a biology lesson but here is was she was trying to explain that when they are able to have sexual relations there is going to be a point where alex will need to behave one way and then, then if she can get her aroused enough, which considering the arousal from the last make out session wouldnt be a issue. That she would be able to ease up and touch her much like anyone else and for a period after her orgasm they could cuddle. This wasn't something that she had ever explored before she had no idea how long the neurotransmitters would keep her skins over sensitivity at bat. The thought of holding Alex, being held by Alex softly even for a few moments, that would be something that she couldn't live without experiencing.

“Essentially the level of touch that you have given so far had been nice, there are a few things that you will need to touch firmly to start, but after you can, well you wont need to I will be able to tolerate touch that is much more soft, and once that happens there are parts of me that are very sensitive indeed. I don't think that it is going to be a problem Alex, the pain was receding last time, just with kissing and the intimate touches.”

“Oh”

Alex had not thought about what the prospect of arousal and biochemical interactions would be on Lex. She was the first person that she had been with that had these difficulties, Alex didn't find it as daunting any more. The initial concerns were about not wanting to be hard and dominant, not risking hurting Lex, she didn't wasn’t that at all, but this information was amazing, she would be able to explore her kiss her, touch her softly and as long as she continued to be aroused she wouldn't be in pain. She smiled up at her and leaned forward for another kiss.

“Thank you for telling me Lex, I was worried that I would hurt you, by not being firm enough or to firm, and I know that you would guide me, but I don't want to do anything to hurt you, when we find ourselves in that position I want you to enjoy it and feel, what I feel for you, as I touch you.”

Lex smiled and pulled her back for another sweet kiss before smiling softly, she was finding Alex Danvers most addicting, she couldn't help but wonder if there was something in the chemical makeup of these Danvers women because they had a hell of an effect on her and Lena. not that Lex was currently planning on complaining, Alex was truly mesmerising.


	58. Second Date

Alex’s Apartment (National City) 14-06-2020 Earth Prime 11:00………

Alex woke with the excitement of a teenager, she was going to have her second date with Lex and she couldn't help but feel every fibre of her body tingling with anticipation. Lex had asked her for the second date, that meant that Lex had fun and wanted the second date, Lex didn't do second dates but still it was happening, at Lex’s request. The last week was a blur of kisses and Lex touching her, her touching Lex, it was a strange mix of professional work and rampaging hormones. They had been exploring but nothing that was considered more than pg13 she figured, after all the clothes had stayed on the whole time. She swallowed thickly as her mind succumbed to the memory of Lex straddling her and grinding onto her, the way her lips lingered on her neck the hands firmly pressed into her. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the memory and the bodily sensations that came with it, then she squeezed her thighs together, she could feel her arousal starting to coat her thighs and realised that she needed to shower nad calm herself before Lex arrived, this was a second date, it wouldn't be a good idea to jump her the moment that she arrived.

She pulled herself from the memories and slipped out of bed heading to the shower, she had already picked her outfit, nothing fancy but on the nicer side of casual, Lex had said about driving, something about her classic cars. She wondered what she had meant by this, was Lex the sort of person to have old style crank cars? Was she about to get to drive something that came out of a forties gangster movie? She shook her head as the water started to flow over her body, she couldn't see that, something more like classic sports cars, she could see Lex being somong who liked to drive fast and test the limits of her human abilities. She knew that Alex was a speedster with her love of ducatis and fast motors, she could only imagine that this would be something that Lex would do, driving something with so much horse power that the raw of the engine itself would leave her buzzing. She washed and slipped out of the shower, towel dry and slipped on her skinny jeans, and tank, they were good quality and hugged her perfectly, she then just needed to slipp on her leather jacket, and some boots. She was ready and just waiting for Lex. She should be here any moment. The text on her phone told her that she was down stairs, she smiled and rushed out grabbing her keys as she closed the door.

Lex had dressed in what she supposed Alex would think a unusual way, but she was practical and driving required freedom not constricting skirts and heels, she was wearing a halter top with her apple bottom jeans and some trainers, of course the outfit itself was expensive but it was casual and comfortable for the task, she was looking forward to watching a excited Alex perusing the cars, she couldn't help but think that Alex would go for the Austin, after all she was a agent, and could live her bond fantasy in that car, but as normal Alex would probably surprise her and pick something completely different, she had a number of her cars taken to the track, some classic vintage and some newer cars too, she pulled up and stepped out of the town car, leaning back against it with her phone in her hand. It was something that she wouldn't normally do, but if she waited in the car she wouldn't be able to get to hug and kiss Alex on arrival. She had spent an unprecedented amount of time thinking about Alex, the noises she made as she touched her in different ways. It had been a little frustrating at first but she had changed her mind about that, the different noises and movements told her more about Alex than she knew about any other lover.

In fact Lex had realised the complex patterns and algorithms that she had developed for these encounters had proved futile when it came to Alex. with other women she could use one of her patterns and give them what they needed, she didn't really worry if everything worked because she knew that once the cycles were complete the woman would be undone, and satisfied. Alex however wanted to enjoy everything, she needed to come up with a whole new idea for her, she wanted Alex to feel good. Lex had never tailored her sexual activities to an individual before, but she wanted to for Alex. She already had a number of sequences that she could use, hitting everywhere that she knew Alex liked, in varying degrees able to work her up slowly and consistently hitting all the places she knew that she liked. As much as she knew that she would need to be taken care of too her main focus was on Alex, she wasn't oblivious to the thought that actually for the first time she was taking her time with something, it clearly was a change in her. She looked up as Alex exited the building and smiled, opening her arms for that hug she knew was coming and a mind blowing kiss that made her think that she would prefer to just take her back upstairs. That was not what Alex would want; she was a relationship person and as much as Lex found this hard, she wanted to for Alex, more than that she wanted it for herself.

“Hello, I think that I could get used to this new greeting, you look perfect Alex, Well shall we proceed?”

“I, wow, you have never looked so wow, that top is amazing and where have you been hiding these jeans? As for the greeting, I think i could get used to it too, but not just as a greeting I hope”

Lex raised her brow and smirked as Alex spoke, that was definitely something that Lex could agree too and slid into the car, moving the large bag to the floor so that they had more room. The partition went up as Alex slid in and Alex blushed lightly, Lex thought that she could get very accustomed to that soft dusting on Alex’s face making her look softer and a touch more innocent and sweet. She liked all aspects of the woman but there was something about this softness that made her hear stutter. As the door closed the car started to move Lex reached for Alex’s hand and squeezed a little before turning to kiss her again. The drive was fairly swift guided along by the fact that Lex was not paying any attention to anything other than Alex kissing her and the feeling of Alex’s hands on her breasts, they had been exploring since the car started to pull away and now it was very clear to Lex that she had become very aroused. This had not been in the plan, although strangely it didn't seem to cause her any distress at all. The thought was interrupted by the intercom.

“Ms Luthor we are at the location do you want me to pull into the hanger?”

Lex broke the kiss and heard the groan that came from Alex’s lips she couldn't help but agree with the assessment, she kissed her lips before responding and having the car taken into the hanger, she sat up and looked at Alex and bit her lip, she knew the action would mean Alex was aware of her condition but she just wanted to know what it felt like. She took alex’s hand and placed it lightly next to her face softly leaning into her hand, Alex's eyes had widened and then almost as if she understood completely she softly stroked her cheek and then slipped her hand down her neck the touch was light and reverent with slow and languid, bruising over her neck tracing her collar bone, down her shoulder and arm and back, the look on Alex’s face was amazing and full of adoration and wonder. Lex understood that as the way Alex’s fingers burned her skin as she moved over her, feeling the heat, like a wisp of flame softly caressing her, the trail sent waves of electricity down her spine, goosebumps following the finger, her skin all taking in the stimulation, radiating our in harmony with the beating of her heart. Her breath catches in her chest as a soft moan falls from her lip, she knew her skin was less sensitive when aroused, but she had never let people touch her like this. The second moan slipped out as Alex’s hand slipped up her side and brushed under her breast on the ribs below. Alex moved her hand.

“Are you ok? did I hurt you?”

“No, Although I am aware that my skin is less sensitive at times, this is not something I have experienced before, It was a surprising and gratifying sensation”

Alex smiled and stoked over the skin again, that was something that she would never tire of hearing, that she was allowed to do things that no one had ever been allowed to do. That she was trusted and wanted enough to be allowed to touch her in this way. Not to mention the beautiful sound that she was making, after all Lex had told her she had not expected her to be this responsive, she dipped down and kissed her neck with a soft brush over the pulse point with her nose, a loving and gentle gesture and she was rewarded with a sigh and soft shiver. She could definitely get used to Lex being like this, soft and responsive, she wondered how long she could keep her aroused enough to touch her and slowly take in every part of her skin. Alex let out her own soft groan as she felt the car stop again. She wanted to stay in the car and just explore this new opportunity to its fullest. She heard a soft chuckle from Lex, she knew that she could laugh at inappropriate moments and she wouldn't necessarily be able to stop.

“What made you laugh?”

“Irony I guess you could call it, Well I have tried to create a date, to do things that I am not good at for you, the relationship part because you make me want that, coming from someone who is ethically promiscuous that is a new position. You on the other hand that is a serial monogamist is the one groaning and complaining about the lack of sexual gratification, since day one. We seem to have reversed our perspectives on my dear inconsistent variable.”

Alex blushed but laughed with her, they had both changed so much since meeting each other, but it was all in a good way, they could change for each other without losing themselves, they made each other better, and Alex had been wanting to be with Lex, wondering what it would be like from the first conversation about touch. She had already been on a slow roast and now she was feeling that she was fully and completely boiled, she just wanted to be able to express how she felt for Lex. she looked her in the eye and kissed her again softly. She raised her brow and looked at Lex for a moment. She knew that she was someone that liked rules and regulations, but she was not sure what parameters she was using for their date, she knew there would be some. They had been open about things so far but she wanted to know what it was that she was using to decide.

“How exactly are you judging what can and can't be done on the dates?”

“Well I havent dated since I was a tenager and that didnt come with physical aspects, so I did what all scientists do I researched, Although I admit the information is conflicting and makes little sense at times, the physical aspects seem to have some sort of correlation with baseball which made no sense, but Lena suggested that I pay no attention to frat boy theories. I found dating etiquette interesting, and well the rest seems to be rather ambiguous although there is some kind of expectation between dates three and five for sexual intimacy”

Lex watched Alex as she was talking, she seemed to be listening and amused by some of the comments but remained quiet, she smiled at her at the end of her analysis, she wondered what Alex would think if there were rules that she had in relationship to dating, but then Alex seemed to be the one that allowed herself to get swept up in the actions first, not that she minded or had any complaints about it. She tilted her head and allowed her lip to quirk as she raised her brow.

“I suppose that there is not a manual or a guide, there isn't even a set of rules either, however i think that there is nothing that could explain on how to manage the situation with you, after all your are the very essence of a wild card, I think that if there was a step by step guide you would not follow it, tell me Alex, how would you suggest that we progress?”

“Well as much as it is against all my normal behaviours things with you, feel natural, and I am happy to share myself with you, and I am honoured that you shared that with me, I guess, we can see how the date goes? In honesty if we don't get out of this car I don't think that we will be finishing our date, or well starting it”

Lex straightened herself up and opened the door stepping out into the hanger where there were a number of cars waiting, she smiled as she watched Alex’s face spread into a wide smile and awestruck look as she took in the choices in the hanger. Lex moved over to the table set up with the keys to the cars, and motioned for Alex to come over, she showed her the keys and explained that she could take her pick and they would drive the track. She watched as Alex looked at all the cars and reverently ran her hands over them before returning and biting her lip nervously. She opted for the Audi R8 Spyder to which Lex raised a brow and handed over the key. She picked the Lamborghini Aventador SVJ. They headed out and did a few laps, Lex was impressed with the way that Alex handled the car, watching her drift around the bends, quickly changing gears and shooting off. She pulled back in and collected the bag from the car leaving Alex to do another lap while she set up.

Alex thought the car was amazing and loved the way it handles. There were a few faster ones and some vintage models too. They wouldn't be as fast but they would be a dream to try out. She realised that Lex was no longer on the track and wondered if she was swapping cars or if she was done. She slowed and entered the hanger to see Lex sitting on a blanket with a picnic of sorts on the blanket with a smile. She parked up and returned the Keys jogging over babbling about the car and handling the speed she knew that she was rambling but she couldn't help it. She sat down with Lex and kissed her passionately before thanking her for the experience.

“We are not done yet, I just thought we should eat before we take any more cars out, the track is ours until five”

They ate and talked easily for a hour before they started driving again, Alex trying all of the cars by the end after all she would not have this opportunity again for a while, maybe Lex would consider doing this a couple times a year, she couldn't really believe that Lex had allowed her to try so many expensive cars. She noticed that Lex seemed exceptionally happy, she wondered if it was the adrenaline, the date, the company or if she just really loved driving, she seemed so much more care free, she couldn't help but wonder if this was something that she enjoyed, but then she would probably say that she didn't experience the enjoyment factor, that it was some kind of neurochemical stimulation. They completed the last lap and then headed to the car, Alex opened the door for her and watched her slip in before she walked around to get in the other side of the town car. She looked at her and smiled kissing her lips in a chased kiss.

“Thank you for that, It was fun, are the cars rentals or are they yours? You seem to be quite relaxed driving, like it is something that you do a lot.”

“Well they are mine, I have quite the collection actually, I used to drive advanced techniques it was something that my Father insisted on, that we were able to drive, at speed and safely just in case, I can drive almost everything, I can also fly a helicopter and a plane, it was due to the constant attacks on the family, it was a necessity to be able to take over the driving or flying to ensure the safety of the family. Once I had mastered it, I found that I missed the stimulus that has happened with a number of things, so I do old activities on a saturday, things I need to practice. It seems that I have developed a pattern that is missed to some things.”

Alex smiled and took her hand as the car started to move heading back, she wasn't ready for the day to end but she didn't want to push Lex, after all she had shared her enjoyment, and a part of herself sexually she had not before. She couldn't help but think that maybe she would need to decompress a little, she was about to ask when she noted a shift in Lex’s position. She soon found that she had Lex in her lap straddling her and kissing her deeply. Her hands moved to Lex’s ass and squeezed as the kiss deepened. When Lex pulled back to give them both time to breathe Alex looked up into her eyes noticing the smile on her face and the smudged lipstick. Lex’s pupils were blown and she was breathing a little heavier. Alex could feel the heat surging through her body as Lex was moving against her a little, it wasn't desperate it was just slow and rhythmic. She was so unbelievably sexy, it was like receiving a lapdance from aphrodite herself, she could feel herself heating up and the arousal starting to pool, she was sure that she had already ruined her panties. The revelry was disrupted by the sound of Lex’s phone.

Lex heard the tone and stopped moving, her body suddenly frozen to the spot, there were only a few people that had distinctive ringtones and that one belonged to Lillian, her eyes were wide as she looked over to where the phone had been discarded and started to run through her mind as to why her mother would be calling, there had been no adverse press, she had been taking care of the DEO, she had not been caught in any compromising situations, although she did vanish for a little trying to sort out Alex’s safety. She couldn't think of anything that would prompt a call from her. She finally managed to move off Alex and grab the phone, signalling for Alex to stay quiet.

“Mother, to what do I owe this pleasure?”

The moment that Alex felt Lex still she wondered what happened, she heard the phone but was surprised that she would stop for a call, that was until she heard the word that slipped from her mouth. Lillian Luthor, was rotten to the core, Alex may have realised that Lena and Lex were not the same but there was nothing in this world that would make her think Lillian Luthor was anything other than evil. She had kidnapped Kara, tried to kill all the aliens in National city, created a clone of Kara to try and kill her, she had attacked Lena on many occasions. The woman was literally the epitome of a bad mother, she could understand why Lex stilled, after all Lillian knew that she was with Lane, and did nothing, it appeared that between the treatments and her actions she had no right to even call herself that. She stayed silent trying not to eavesdrop although it wasn't exactly easy in the back of a town car.

“No, I have an assistant there, I am well aware of what is needed, do you really think that someone of my intellect needs a full working week to manage that agency? I am at the DEO two and a half days most weeks, and I am not really needed there, my time is more valuable than sitting behind that desk, in a bunker. Lena has LCorp and I meet with her regularly, I have my eye on things as you wanted, after all you changed the universe to put me there, clearly it had my attention.”

Alex couldn't help but wonder why Lillian was taking such an active interest, there was clearly more going on, she also noted that Lex didn't comment on the lab.

“No mother, I have been stable, no fluctuations, I am well aware and fully capable of running the tests myself, I know what I am looking for. There is no need for you to trouble yourself by coming here. Everything is fine, yes I understand that, I need to make sure that I keep an eye on it, I will send you the latest results next week and I will collect the new paperwork as soon as it arrives, when do you think that will be? I would rather not waste a day sitting at the DEO for paperwork to arrive.”

Alex didn't like the sound of something that was for Lex’s eyes only, although she didn't seem to be interested in the DEO there were still things that she had to do, she wondered what Lillian was up to that would need Lex to sign it off? She shouldn't be listening, damn it, why did she have to call then? She didn't want this to come between them, she also didn't want to pressure Lex into telling her what it was about. She was worried that it would endanger Kara; this was not a fun position that she wanted to be in.

“Fine, I will expect it next week, I will send the information on Wednesday”

Lex hung up, she had no idea why this was happening now, there was something on its way that she had no idea about, and her mother wanted her stable for it, that didn't sound good. She looked up at Alex and could see that she was curious too.

“Mother hasn't given me a treatment in nearly six months, she doesn't know that Lena is helping, she was checking because the government has an initiative that she needs me stable for, and she is concerned about the direction of LCorp. I am sorry that it ruined the date, I need to go to Lena to get some tests modified for my mother, the last thing I want is her here, I don't want to go back to that lab.”

Alex kissed her and nodded understanding and slipped out of the now stationary car. Watching Lex pull away, she sighed, she didn't know what was going on but she knew that it wasn't good.


End file.
